Total Drama Academy: Year One
by Lord Akiyama
Summary: AU The twenty-two campers are forced to attend an elite-level boarding school. Sounds like it is going to be a good thing... right? The first year, Junior Year, is covered.
1. Week 0, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter One

---

**(Two weeks ago...)**

_Greetings, camper!_

_Bet you weren't expecting to see my handsome face again once you popped in this DVD, huh? Hope you've been enjoying whatever is left of your fifteen minutes of fame, because I got some good news and bad news for you. The bad news is that we're going to invoke a particular clause in the fine print you just oh so love. Check it, we didn't get enough applicants accepted to participate in the second season of Total Drama Island before the deadline period. We ended up receiving only seven applications and they were all very sad, believe me. Since we obviously don't have enough contestants for the next season, we're bringing the band back together. That's right, the ever lovable fine print states that we are legally allowed to drag your sorry butts back on camera under the circumstances mentioned. Awesome, isn't it?_

_But here is the good news. The producers were recently approached by a really swank boarding school with the proposition of making a reality show at their school for the sake of some cheap publicity. We pulled some strings and they agreed to let you guys in under a special scholarship. How swank of a school are we talking? Nine out of every ten students who have attended have gone on to study at either some Ivy League college or a major foreign university. Those same graduates would later become some of the biggest names in politics, business, entertainment, a couple even became Nobel Prize winners. You don't have to take my word for it. Just review the scholarship package provided and you'll see why Richmore Academy is a school you wouldn't dream of not attending. If anything, your parents would forbid you from declining this offer if you had the choice. But you don't, so you're coming whether you like it or not._

_Your experience here will be nothing like that of Total Drama Island. For one, you'll be here for two years. Our deal with the school requires that we not do any eliminations. The only reason any of you would be kicked out is either because you haven't been following the school rules or haven't been maintaining passable grades. This is a pretty strict school and education is of the highest order here. I'll explain more about what you kids will be doing once you get here in two weeks. That's plenty of time to learn more about the school, figure out what to pack, and say good-bye to your friends and family. I can promise you that from this point on your life is about to change forever._

_Welcome to Richmore Academy!_

_And welcome to Total... Drama... Academy!_

_(__Cue Theme Song)_

_

* * *

_**(Week 0, Day 0)**

The bus came to a steady stop before the front gate of the school. The doors slid open and the twenty-two passengers began to exit one by one. Most had their bags and luggage with them in hand while the others moved swiftly to the side of the bus to remove them from the storage compartment. With everyone and their stuff accounted for, the bus quickly closed its doors and made an immediate retreat from the area. The twenty-two passengers were left behind in the dust. Once the coughing fits had subsided, they all had a chance to look about their surroundings.

"Remind me why I'm doing this all over again?" LeShawna asked sarcastically.

"The damned fine print, that's why," Gwen grumbled and followed up with a sigh. "Another reason why I'm very suspicious that this school is what Chris claims it to be. It's too good to be true."

"Then let's hope so," Noah commented aloud. "Because then we can sue him for false advertising and get out of our contracts."

"Which is why the whole thing is probably legitimate, really," Harold retorted. "Chris loves to flaunt how he can legally get away with some of things he does, so you can bet he's doing everything he can to ensure that we don't hit him with a lawsuit."

"I hate to say it, but if we are indeed studying here then I'll be indebted to him," Courtney said, seemingly rather ashamed with herself while being excited at the same time. "Just to graduate from here will guarantee me a term in public office one day."

"Well, I could care less if this is for real or not," Duncan noted with a shrug. "As long as I'm not in juvie for the next two years, I'll be perfectly content." He then managed to slip an arm around Courtney's shoulders and form a sly grin on his face. "Not to mention I get to spend more time with you, princess."

"Duncan!" Courtney whined, trying unsuccessfully to release herself from his grip. She wasn't even trying all that much to begin with as her cheeks began to turn a shade of pink.

"We don't need another couple sucking face non-stop, thank you," Noah said, jerking his thumb over toward Bridgette and Geoff. The two were in the middle a heavy make out sessions which had been going on long since before they even got on the bus earlier. Some would dare imagine they've been kissing since last night.

"Make that three," Eva noted, jerking her thumb at Lindsay and Tyler. The two had apparently followed Bridgette and Geoff's lead and engage in their own make out session, probably as early as while they were on the bus.

"I must admit, I'm rather surprised they managed to still be together," Noah noted with a raised brow.

"This is going to be so cool," Izzy proclaimed as she perched herself upon Owen's shoulder. "I can't wait to check out some of the clubs they got. I wonder if they have an adventure club. Do you think they'll allow me to bring my pet snake on campus?"

"You have a pet snake?" DJ asked in horror, using his hands to try and shield his pet rabbit Bunny away from Izzy's line of sight.

"Oh yeah, it's really awesome," Owen answered for his crazy girlfriend with a chuckle. "It's a big one and one time it tried to swallow me whole. But it could only go as far up as my stomach." Hearing this did little to comfort DJ.

"I can't believe I have to spend another two years with you dweebs," Heather muttered aloud. "And there's no prize money to be gained out of this. It's completely unfair." She brushed her now shoulder-length hair behind the back of her head.

"Keep up that attitude and I'll shave off all the hair that managed to grow back," LeShawna threatened. She engaged in a glaring contest with Heather that would last the entire day if they allowed for it to.

"Speaking of changes," Cody said, clearing his throat in an effort to dissolve the tension in the air. He then turned to Beth, smiling nervously. "Beth, I noticed you got your braces removed. You look great."

"Really?" Beth asked then turned her head shyly while smiling. "Thanks. It just feels so good being able to talk normally now without having to deal with the stupid lisp any more."

"Beth looks really cute without her braces, doesn't she Sadie?" Katie asked her BFFFL.

"Totally!" Sadie agreed. "Her teeth are so white and perfect. Just like Justin!" The two girls then began to squeal as they turned their eyes to the hunk in question.

"And my contract with Glutius Maximus Modeling will make absolutely sure that I stay that way," Justin mused to himself aloud as he admired his reflection in the mirror he held.

Trent noticed that this goth girlfriend hadn't quite relaxed about the situation despite the earlier conversation. Wanting to be the ever faithful boyfriend, he wrapped his arms around her for comfort. "At least there's one good thing about all this, beautiful," he whispered to her. "Neither one of us have to drive two hours to see each other now."

Gwen managed to give out a gentle sigh and curve her lips enough to form a small smile. "You're right, handsome," she whispered back. "That is one good thing."

Cody looked around at everyone in the group, as though to make sure all were once again accounted for. He then noticed Ezekiel sitting alone, seemingly looking as though he was completely separated from the group. "Hey, Ezekiel," the techno-geek called out to the other. "Looking forward to actually going to a school now?"

The home-schooled prairie boy flinched upon hearing his name called. He looked up quite nervously, instinctively looking to pull his toque down over his eyes. His eyes darted quickly from one body to another, looking to see just what kind of faces they were making at him. Most appeared rather indifferent while others, mainly the girls, glared at him. As if daring him to say something sexist so that they would be given all the reason in the world to pummel him into a bloody pulp.

"I... I..." he stammered to begin, failing miserably. He swallowed hard, becoming increasingly more nervous by the second. "I... don't kn'oo... eh..." He finally managed to pull his toque down over his eyes in embarrassment.

Barely a second later, a golf cart rolled out from beyond the front gate and stopped before the group. At the driver's side was the ever familiar frame of Chef Hatchet. Sitting in the passenger side and holding a megaphone in hand is the handsome face of the man most everyone present hated. Their host, Chris McLean.

"Welcome back, campers!" Chris called out to them through the megaphone despite being a couple short feet away from them. "Or should I say _students_! Welcome back for another glorious season, two more in fact, of your run on Total Drama! For the next two years, we will be filming your every step and breath you take here in Kitchener, Ontario. Now let's get a move on here, people. We're on a tight schedule today and we want to delay the horrifying inevitable for as long as possible."

"The pain and suffering you'll be torturing us with?" Noah sarcastically asked aloud.

"Close," Chris replied. "You forget that you're all celebrities. And were the students here not in the middle of class, you would all be swarmed by a sea of fans from which you couldn't escape from. So we better get going to your assigned dormitory before they get out of class any time soon."

"Aren't you gonna provide us with a ride?" LeShawna asked.

"No," Chris answered. "Besides, no motorized vehicle bigger than this cart is allowed on campus. So you're all walking no matter what. Time's a wasting!"

"I hate that man..." Heather muttered in a low voice before begrudgingly grabbing all of her bags and luggage and joining the others in following the cart through the front gate. Fortunately for them, Chef was driving slow enough for them to keep pace.

"This is Richmore Academy!" Chris announced to the students through the megaphone. "A highly prestigious and private boarding school that is among the elite in all of Canada. You have to be really smart to even consider wanting to study here. And those who managed to even hear about it know that this is the kind of school your parents want you to go to. I wasn't kidding when I said that graduates here have been set for life almost immediately. So you should all be thankful that our show is giving you this opportunity of a life-time here."

Most wanted to give a retort to the last statement he had made. Instead, they were in awe of the campus they were walking through. The buildings were quite majestic, very classical looking. Everything was clean and professionally maintained. It certainly looked like an elite-level school. Much better looking than the public high schools virtually all had previously attended. Ezekiel was in awe of seeing a school for the first time.

"Now, you're all wondering how the hell we managed to pull this off," Chirs continued to speak through the megaphone. "As noted before, the school came to us. Total Drama Island was such a huge success that they went to the producers to pull another winning reality show based around the school. We liked the idea, but we liked it even better when we thought about bringing you all back for another go around. It took some convincing, but we managed to strike a deal with them so that you all would be able to attend. Given the academic scores most of you get on average, consider yourselves very lucky to even set foot on this campus. They generally only accept those with the highest of grades."

"Meaning neither Lindsay or Owen could possibly have gone here without having been on the show," Heather muttered to herself quietly. Unfortunately, she wasn't quiet enough as she was nailed in the back of the head with a slap from LeShawna.

"As part of the deal, you will be taking classes that will separate you from the students who actually belong here," Chris continued, seemingly uninterrupted. "However, we understand that there are a couple of you who feel you deserve to be a true Richmore student. So you will all be taking the entrance exam Sunday afternoon. Those who pass will be allowed to study with the rest of the student body. Everyone else will be sticking together whether you like it or not."

"Aww, that's too bad," Duncan mused quietly to Courtney. He still managed to maintain a grin on his face. "I'll probably never get the chance to see just how much of an overachiever you are, princess."

Courtney appeared as though she wanted to lash out verbally at him for making such a comment. Instead, the statement caused her to feel differently as evident by the blushing of her cheeks. Moments later, the students were led to a dormitory building that appeared to be isolated from the rest of the school on campus. This was where Chef brought the cart to a stop. Chris immediately leaped onto the top of cart, megaphone still in hand.

"This is Riker Hall, boys and girls," the handsome host announced. "It is here where you will be staying for two years. Because this whole building was empty when we made the deal with the school, this place became just right for us to set up shop. You will be rooming on the west end of the hall while the east end will house the production crew and our equipment. Making this place even more wicked is the cool amphitheater we have. Which is where we will be heading straight into right this second."

"What about our stuff, man?" Geoff asked, having taken a moment to stop making out with Bridgette.

"We need to lay down some rules of the school before you guys can settle in," Chris answered, hoping off the cart. "And trust me when I say that you guys would want to get through all that is scheduled as quickly as possible. So move, people!"

The twenty-two students begrudgingly followed the host and Chef Hatchet into Riker Hall. Upon entering, they noticed that the living space looked rather plain. Practically empty, in fact. Just a couple chairs and a couch that could barely fit four bodies.

"In case you're wondering, you will get a chance to decorate the living space later on," Chris said, answering the unvoiced question everyone had. "The question you should be asking yourselves is how we will decide for you to decorate." This statement didn't make any of the students comfortable. But before they could ask him to elaborate, he jerked his thumb over to a door on the east end of the room. "Behind that door will be the confessional cam. That room you can litter with decorations to your heart's content any time you wish."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Owen - "Ho-oh wow! This is going to be awesome! It'll be like practice for when I go to college."

Harold - "This is rather plain looking. Maybe I can spruce it up a little with some pictures and stuff. Make it more homely."

Ezekiel - "It actually doesn't look all that bad, eh? Then again, I barely have anythin' at home as it is so what do I kn'oo."

Courtney - "I think everyone is forgetting that Chris just opened the flood gates in terms of how this place will be decorated. I'm betting that this place will just be horrible looking by the end of the month with all the clashing going on in here. It's going to be just absolutely vile."

* * *

The amphitheater was quite large. Certainly enough to seat maybe a thousand people easy. The students scattered about on the main floor seats while Chris and Chef stepped up onto the stage. Also on the stage was a young woman, roughly the same age as the students, sitting near the podium the handsome host made his way toward.

The woman wore what appeared to be the school's uniform. A magenta long-sleeved shirt with a navy blue ruffle scarf popping out over her chest. The navy blue also coloring the shirt she wore while the magenta colored the long shin-high socks that were covered by a pair of fancy black heel shoes. She had her brunette hair tied into a bun with a few loose bangs hanging over her blue eyes, which were covered by a plain looking pair of glasses.

"Before you get briefed on the school rules, I need to tell you one thing about how we're going to work things out on our end," Chris spoke in the microphone at the podium. Fortunately for the students, not with the assistance of the megaphone he still had in his hand. "Education is of the highest order here at Richmore, which leaves us with having to do our challenges on the weekend. Friday night should work just fine for you folks, don't you think? And hey, today is Friday. Meaning we're going to have a challenge on your first day again. Awesome, huh?"

The students began to groan in frustration. It did, though, let them know why Chris said it would be in their best interest to get through their schedule quickly. So they could get the day's challenge out of the way as soon as possible.

"I will say that part of the deal we have with the school is that we are not allowed to have elimination challenges," Chris added, causing some of the students to sigh in relief. "It is felt that taking you out of the school just because you did bad in a challenge that had nothing to do with your academics would be unfair to your education. We'll just bank on you troublemakers getting booted out through official school means. But we need to ensure that you folks perform in our challenges. So the school has agreed to apply that you must be here to attend our challenges, or else your GPA will be affected."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "I'm not surprised Chris managed to pull such a stunt. Doesn't make me any happier. My GPA will take a hit if I don't participate? And he wonders why we're not appreciative toward him and the show."

* * *

"We also expect you to perform well in these challenges despite the fact that you don't get the boot if you fail," Chris continued. "So we're throwing in a number of incentives. Those who perform the poorest or gives the weakest effort in the challenge will be nailed with a disadvantage or handicap in the following week's challenge. Forcing you to have to work that much harder to avoid having to go through it twice in a row. Those who win challenges will be rewarded with some swank prizes."

A curtain behind Chris began to raise. It revealed a large pile of prizes that were indeed, in Chris' words, swank. Some of the students were quite impressed, a couple actually giving out long whistles to voice their approval.

"Most of the prizes will come from the pile you see before you," the handsome host added. "And some challenges will be rewarded with other cool prizes that we won't tell you about until you win. Don't worry, they're all really good. All the more reason we want you to bring your A-game. In addition, we'll randomly throw in the bonus of not having to participate in the next week's challenge. Attendance is mandatory, but you get to sit back and enjoy watching your fellow students being tortured. Just remember that these are being offered randomly, so you won't know if you will be able to sit out the next week until we tell you."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "Knowing Chris, my guess is that we will rarely see that bonus be given out. I actually wouldn't be surprised if he only gives it out once throughout our entire stay here."

* * *

"Now then, it's time to rundown the school's rules," Chris said. "And here to do that is the young lady who will be your Resident Assistant, Jessica."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "Of the hundreds who applied to be the R.A. for our group, we liked Jessica the best. Primarily because she honestly wasn't qualified to be an R.A. anywhere else. She knows the score and is more than willing to help us create some extra drama up in here. This is going to be awesome!"

* * *

"Good day, everyone," Jessica said as she now stood behind the podium. "I'm Jessica and I'll be your R.A. during your two year stay here at Richmore. The school applies a three strike policy when it comes to the rules of conduct around here. You can obviously tell that receiving three strikes means you're out of the school. Since education is valued the most, here is what you need to know in order to graduate from here.

"Because you will all be separated from the students who truly belong here, your average for a passing grade will be different. It will be based off the country's grading standards. You will receive a strike if your GPA is below the acceptable passing score at the end of a quarter. This obviously means that you need to maintain grades that are general passing level in this country through at least six quarters if you expect to graduate from here.

"As Chris mentioned, you will be taking the school's entrance exam on Sunday to see if any of you actually qualify to study with the student body here. If you happen to pass the exam, you must then maintain the school's acceptable passing level in order to avoid getting a strike. And you are expected to maintain a GPA no greater than 3.7 in order to do so. If you receive two strikes, you will be knocked out of learning with the privileged students. In addition, the two strikes will remain so you will want to avoid dropping below the accepted general passing level for the sake of your dignity."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - "To be perfectly honest, I can only see Courtney and Noah possibly passing the entrance exam and studying with the student body. I don't think anyone else in our group would be smart enough. Izzy claims she has an IQ of 188, but I have to say that I'm pretty doubtful about that."

* * *

"When it comes to rule breaking, the three strike policy is broken up into two stages," Jessica further explained. "Minor rule breaking and major rule breaking. Three minor rule breaking strikes are the equivalent of one major rule breaking strike. Obviously three major rule breaking strikes result in you getting the boot. So watch yourselves. If I don't report something, then it didn't happen. Try to avoid attracting the attention of other staff members and you should be fine.

"Let me say one more thing before we move on. Chris forgot to mention the cameras in your rooms. The school does respect personal privacy of the students, so the cameras will be deactivated from midnight to six in the morning every night. The school has no curfew regarding staying out, quiet hours, when lights should be off, or anything of the such. But noise does play a factor and you will be issued a strike if you get too loud. Whether you get a minor or major rule breaking strike will be determined by school officials. I recommend just keeping the noise at a sensible level and not getting caught doing anything stupid."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Hmmm... Sounds awfully vague as to whether the rule breaking I do will be considered minor or major. It's all up to the school officials, and it appears they don't have some sort of standard by which to recognize a minor over a major rule break. Better choose my battles carefully, because I'm not going back to juvie. Would keep me away from Courtney."

* * *

"Alright, let's move on to the next item on the agenda," Jessica announced. "Your rooms. Given some of the things Chris and company have planned for you in future challenges, there is one hallway in the west end open to you guys to room in. And there are only twelve rooms. So twenty of you will be sharing your sleeping space with someone else. Follow me so we can figure out who is in which room so you can put your stuff down."

The twenty-two students followed Jessica out of the amphitheater and into the west wing of Riker Hall. They went up one flight of stairs to the second floor before entering the hallway that no doubt would be the location of their rooms.

"The south side of the hall are the odd numbered rooms," Jessica began to explain. "That side will also be where the boys will stay in. The north side will be the even numbered rooms and where the girls are at. At the far end of the hallway are two bathrooms, one per side and each containing five shower stalls and five toilets. The furthest end is the laundry room, which contains five washers and five dryers. It's not necessary, but I highly recommend setting up a timetable sheet so that you all won't be butting heads over who gets to do their laundry load first."

"So, how do we determine who gets what room?" Cody asked.

"It's already been arranged," Jessica said, revealing a clipboard in hand that she had apparently been keeping concealed under her left arm. "By Chef Hatchet." She ignored the groans that responded to her revelation and merely walked over to the first room. "Let's just get you into your rooms so we can quickly move through the schedule for today, shall we? Room one will be occupied by Owen. All by his lonesome self."

"I get a room to myself?" Owen exclaimed with excitement. "Woo hoo! This is going to be awesome!" He pumped his hands in the air in victory before rushing into his room with all of his belongings.

"How the hell does Owen get a room to himself?" Heather asked in frustration.

"He did win Total Drama Island," Cody answered. Though the answer was perfectly reasonable, it didn't give Heather any sort of comfort as she just scowled and rolled her eyes.

"In room two will be Bridgette and Courtney," Jessica announced, reading from the clipboard.

Courtney let out a sigh of relief. "At least I get to room with a friend," she commented aloud. "Right, Bridgette?" There was no immediate response. "Bridgette?" She turned to find her roommate still in the midst of a heavy make out session with her boyfriend. "I hope this doesn't end up becoming too much of a problem."

"I'm sure you'll figure something out to let her know which room she's in," Jessica noted. She hadn't removed her eyes from the clipboard the entire time. "In room three will be Duncan and Ezekiel."

All Duncan had to do was glance over at the boy assigned to be his roommate and it was more than enough to cause Ezekiel to flinch in utter fear. Duncan shrugged and let out a light chuckle. "Just don't insult princess whenever she's in the room and we'll be perfectly peachy, home school," Duncan said.

"Who said I would ever go into your room, Duncan?" Courtney complained, though it was perfectly obvious the blush on her cheeks were not out of anger.

"Moving on," Jessica interrupted. "Room four will be Lindsay and Sadie."

Sadie and Katie looked quite horrified upon hearing that they wouldn't be rooming together. "But... But why am I being separated from Katie?" Sadie cried. "Doesn't he know by now that we're BFFFL's?"

"You're more than welcome to plead your case to Chef Hatchet," Jessica noted aloud. "Though I highly doubt any one of you could come up with a good enough reason for him to change the assignments. Consider them final, boys and girls. Whether you like it or not. Any way, room five will be Geoff and Noah."

"Great," Noah sighed sarcastically. "I have to room with the party animal. How joyous." He managed to catch sight of his roommate still in the middle of making out with his girlfriend and just rolled his eyes.

"Since your his roommate, you can help me separate them long enough for them to put their stuff away," Courtney said to Noah.

"And I should exert any effort to do so because..." Noah said with a raised brow, caring less about what he was just about to get himself into with such a cynical attitude.

"Because I'm going to make you help her," Duncan said, immediately stepping behind the know-it-all.

Noah didn't seem to care all that much. "Like you physically threatening me is going to do that much of a difference," he said. "I'm the youngest of eight, pal. I've experienced every trick in the book."

"I don't have to get physical to make you squeal, smart mouth," Duncan noted confidently.

"While that's happening, let's find the rest of you your assigned rooms," Jessica said, her attention still remaining upon the clipboard in hand. "Room six will be Beth and Izzy."

"I'm not rooming with Heather, so I think I'll be fine," Beth said after a seemingly hesitant shrug. The reason for her hesitation became apparent when her roommate glomped her from behind.

"We're going to be the best, roomie!" Izzy cheered. "I think you'll get along fine with my pet snake!"

"S-Snake...?" Beth whimpered.

"No snakes allowed on campus, Izzy," Jessica announced.

"Aww," Izzy whined. "Why not?"

"School officials consider it too dangerous of a pet to have here," their R.A. replied, her eyes still fixed upon the clipboard. "A few years back, a student got permission to have his pet cat on campus. Turned out to be a tiger. The officials had to draw the line on what kind of pets would be allowed after that."

"Pet tiger, huh," Izzy said with a curious smirk on her face. "I'd like to meet him."

"Moving along," Jessica said, not wanting to continue conversing with Izzy any further at the moment. "In room seven, it will be DJ and Justin. I've been informed that you have a pet rabbit, DJ. Yes, officials will allow pet rabbits on campus."

"Good to know," DJ said happily, stroking Bunny with a free hand. He then turned to his assigned roommate. "Hope you don't mind that Bunny rooms with us, bro."

"Sounds fantastic," Justin said, apparently oblivious to whatever DJ had just said. His attention was fixed upon the room they would be sharing. "Listen, do you mind if I have the room to myself a couple times a week? My modeling contract requires I send in stills every month and there's enough space for a number of photo shoots I have in mind."

"Over in room eight will be Katie and LeShawna," Jessica stated.

Katie sniffled. "N-Now I'm farther away from Sadie..." she whimpered.

"Girl, don't you fret," LeShawna said, wrapping an arm around her roommate's shoulders. "I know you and I are going to be good friends and Sadie's allowed to come to our room any time she wants."

"Y-You mean that?" Katie asked.

"Absolutely," LeShawna replied. "So long as you two keep the noise down." Unfortunately for her, it seemed that her roommate didn't quite get the last sentence as the would-be twins began squealing and hugging upon hearing the good news for them. "Think I'm gonna need some work on getting them to turn that noise down."

"In room nine will be Trent and Tyler," Jessica announced.

Trent looked at his roommate and shrugged. "I'm cool with that," he said.

"Same here, dude," Tyler nodded.

"So if there's only one room left for the boys, does that mean Cody and I are sharing room eleven?" Harold asked upon figuring in all of the deductions he made in his head.

"That would be correct," Jessica answered.

"Yes!" Harold said, pumping his fist.

"I know you and I are going to make great roommates, buddy," Cody said with an equal share of enthusiasm.

"So that leaves me, weird goth girl and the rage-aholic without rooms," Heather summarized. "And there's only two rooms left. Chef had better given me a room to myself for what he did to my hair."

Gwen rolled her eyes to the queen bee's statement. "As long as I don't room with her, I'll be fine," she muttered.

"Just tell me what my room is already," Eva growled in frustration. "I got a lot of weights to put down."

"Very well," Jessica responded. This time, she looked away from the clipboard and smiled at the three remaining girls. "Room ten will be Eva and Heather. Room twelve will be Gwen all to herself."

"What?" Heather cried in horror. "Why the hell does weird goth girl get the room to herself and I have to room with the rage-aholic? What's the reasoning behind that?"

"Gwen was the finalist on Total Drama Island," Trent replied, placing an arm around his happy goth girlfriend. "If you ask me, that's a fair enough reason for her to get a room to herself."

"Fair to you because you're dating her!" Heather roared in retort. "How does it explain me having to room with Eva?"

"You sure you want to be venting your anger this loudly?" Tyler asked curiously.

Heather was about to respond with great frustration and anger when she realized why Tyler asked the question. The reason for it was seething down the back of her neck. She swallowed nervously and then turned slowly to face the furious eyes of her roommate. And she didn't look too happy.

"You have a problem rooming with me?" Eva asked with a huff.

"Need I remind you people that we are on a tight schedule for today," Jessica said after clearing her throat, tapping her right foot in the process. "So will you all please drop your things in your rooms quickly so we can make our way to the tailor shop and get you boys and girls your uniforms. Those who don't like their roommates can pummel each other later."

At that second, a very loud and rather wet sounding pop was heard. Virtually all heads turned to see Courtney and Noah successfully separating Bridgette and Geoff from their lip lock. Both looked quite confused that they were now being stared at by everyone in the hallway.

"What?" Geoff asked in a clueless state.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - "Geoff is so wonderful and handsome that it doesn't take much for him to do something that would make me want to kiss him. He's much more romantic than I had ever thought. Even just thinking about him makes me want to kiss him." /_Gives out a blissful sigh._/ "... I hope it's not too much of a distraction..."

Courtney - "I really like Bridgette. And I guess I like Geoff, too. But they can't be making out every second of every day. They won't be able to focus on their studies. And if they don't focus on their studies, they're gonna get booted for their low scores. And if Bridgette gets booted, it might mean I'll get a different roommate. And to be honest, I don't think I'd be comfortable with any of the other girls as my roommate."

Ezekiel - "I... I'm really scared, eh. Scared a'boot bein' here an' all. Never b'in to a s'kool before. Havin' to be with girls I insulted the first day I met 'em. ... Now I have to share a room with Duncan. Who c'ood snap me like a toothpick if he wanted to. He w'oodn't need a reason to do it, eh. He w'ood just do it. ... Oh, why did I sign up to be on the show, eh?" /_Begins to cry in sorrow._/

Gwen - "I'm still awfully suspicious about the whole thing. But... I guess I could enjoy a little of what's happened so far. I get a room to myself. I only have to deal with challenges once a week instead of every three days." /_Begins to slightly blush._/ "And I get spend a lot of time with Trent without one of us having to drive two hours to see the other."

Cody - "So after we put our stuff down in our rooms, we have to go to a tailor shop to get fitted into school uniforms. I was pretty excited because I think the uniforms look good. Well... at least the girls' uniforms..." /_Starts to swoon._/

DJ - "I have to say, I was a little concerned about going to the tailor shop. Mostly because I could only imagine just how long it was going to take to get Owen fitted in a uniform his size."

* * *

"You're probably the second biggest boy to ever get fitted in my shop, young man," the ancient looking tailor commented aloud as he finished measuring Owen. "Fortunately for you, I managed to work on customizing sizes for folks as big as you in my spare time. Probably need to make snippets on the sleeve here and there."

While the tailor worked on getting Owen properly fitted in his uniform, the other students were getting finished putting their uniforms on. The girls were wearing similar uniforms to the one their R.A. was wearing. The boys wore a magenta coat over their white buttoned up shirt. Their pants were navy blue and their tie were stripes of magenta and navy blue.

Lindsay checked herself out in the nearest mirror and began to slightly pout. "This doesn't show enough of my belly," she whined. "You could barely see my naval in this. Don't you think so too, Tyson?"

Her focus was more upon her reflection rather than what her boyfriend thought. Otherwise, she would have noticed how Tyler probably didn't mind that not enough of her belly was showing. Not when he was too busy drooling uncontrollably at just how apparently sexy she looked in her uniform.

"All your nit-picking about the uniforms will fall on deaf ears, people," Jessica said, watching over all the students from one side of the shop. "You must wear your uniforms during all class hours. Don't even think about trying accidentally walk into a lecture wearing casual clothing. You should rather turn up late and in uniform than on time and in a shirt and jeans. Your footwear must be black and must cover your entire foot."

"Does this mean we can't wear hats either?" Geoff asked rather nervously. He wasn't the only one as Ezekiel clutched his toque as if his life depended upon it.

"The only ones who would mind about headgear would be the professors," Jessica answered with a shrug. "Some will want you to take them off, but frankly they don't care. The school is strict enough that you have to wear the uniforms so they figured you should be allowed at least a little personal flare."

"Excellent!" Geoff cheered. As if in victory, he swooped Bridgette into his arms and began to passionately kiss her.

"Not again!" Noah groaned. "Courtney, I think this is going to be a daily routine for us."

"Huh, wha?" Courtney replied, looking as though she had been momentarily distracted. "Oh, right! I'll be right there!" The pink on her cheeks were glowing brighter after catching one last glance of Duncan, who merely returned it with a smirk.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "Oh dear... Oh dear, oh dear... Duncan actually looking nice by wearing that uniform... Oh dear... I can't believe how turned on I am just thinking about it... I feel so ashamed..." /_Starts stroking her collarbone unconsciously._/

Duncan - "I hate uniforms in general. Reminds me too much of the crap I have to wear in juvie. Feels like I'm wearing something meant to be uncomfortable. But ever since I caught sight of Courtney checking me out, I think it's starting to grow on me. Feeling more comfortable wearing it by the minute. I'm liking this school more and more."

* * *

All twenty-two students were now back in the Riker Hall amphitheater, sitting in randomly scattered seats throughout the main floor, still in their school uniforms. Jessica was standing behind the podium with Chris and Chef Hatchet to her left.

"I think we managed to make good time, boys and girls," their R.A. stated rather proudly. "I think we're all going to get along just fine. Since Chris will only see you every Friday for your challenges, I'll be the person to talk to if you have any general questions during and about your stay here at Richmore. Now then, time to turn it back over to Chris." Jessica took a few steps back as Chris stepped over to be directly behind the podium.

"Thank you, Jessica," Chris spoke through the microphone before taking a good look at the students. "Wow. I have to say, you guys look rather spiffy in your school uniforms. Owen my man, I'm surprised they managed to find one in your size. But enough about your clothes, it's time for your first challenge."

The students began to groan. It just made Chris smile wider and chuckle at their misery.

"Don't worry, this week's challenge will be relatively painless," he announced. "All you have to do is decorate your room in a way that will impress myself, Chef Hatchet, Jessica, and a special jury for tonight. In a moment, you will have thirty minutes to formulate a plan of how to decorate your room. Those with roommates, you'll want to consider figuring how to sproose up the room in a way that will make you both comfortable."

Some of the students began to nervously glance over at their respective roommates, knowing their personalities would be a detriment to the challenge. In particular Heather and Eva, Duncan and Ezekiel, and Beth and Izzy. More so Beth than Izzy.

"When the thirty minutes are up, Jessica will take you to the nearest department store where you'll have an hour to shop," the handsome host continued. "Each room, and I do mean room, will have a budget of $100 for this challenge. We're not going to give you any more, but we can't stop you from dipping into your own money if you think it will help make your room that much better. We could care less what you do with your cash. Upon returning here from the department store, you'll have five hours to get your room all decorated before judging. The amount of time you have to decorate was determined by how quickly you managed to get through our schedule for today.

"Now here's where the fun part really begins. Myself, Chef Hatchet and Jessica will each make personal picks for which room we liked the best and which room we liked the least. The occupants of the three losing rooms will have a disadvantage or handicap of sorts in next week's challenge. The three favorite rooms will then be voted on by our special jury, who will determine which is the winning room. The occupant, or occupants, of the room will be rewarded from our prize pile here on the stage. The occupants of the favorite rooms will also get to decorate the living space just outside the amphitheater with the winning room getting to spear-head the whole deal. That project you'll have plenty of time to do as well as all the money you need."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "The winning prize may not seem like it would be worth the effort, but I think in a few weeks time everyone will wish they had tried their best in the challenge. I mean, these are going to be decorations we have to live with for two years. That goes for the living space, too. Since Cody and I know this, I think we'll be able to pull it off successfully so that even if we don't win we'll be quite happy with how our room looks."

Ezekiel - "Now I'm really scared, eh. I'm perfectly fine with the room lookin' so plain an' all, but I bet Duncan will wanna dress it up to his likin'. I dunno if I'm gonna like it, eh. I bet he w'ood hurt me worse than Eva if I had to tell 'em."

Gwen - "I'm betting some of the others are thinking that Owen and I will have it easy since we both don't have to deal with roommates. I keep reminding myself that Chris and Chef are judging in this challenge. They have no taste, so I'm concerned they're going to unfairly pick someone as a loser just because they don't like them despite how great of an effort they put into their decorations. Although... there is a wild card in all this. I'm not quite certain which side Jessica is on."

Jessica - "Chris said I'm allowed to use the confession cam since I'm the group's R.A. While I agreed to help create some extra drama for the show if need be, I just want to state that I'm not one of Chris' minions. I'll be pulling the strings my way."

* * *

Here is a recap of who is assigned to which room:

**Room One** - Owen

**Room Two** - Bridgette and Courtney

**Room Three** - Duncan and Ezekiel

**Room Four** - Lindsay and Sadie

**Room Five** - Geoff and Noah

**Room Six** - Beth and Izzy

**Room Seven** - DJ and Justin

**Room Eight** - Katie and LeShawna

**Room Nine** - Trent and Tyler

**Room Ten** - Eva and Heather

**Room Eleven** - Cody and Harold

**Room Twelve** - Gwen

* * *

Special thanks to the following folks:

**Just Another Fanatic** - I borrowed a number of ideas from her story _Total Drama School_. Don't worry, I'm going in a completely different direction with mine.

**The Kobold Necromancer** - Author of a fantastic story in _Total Drama Comeback_ and whose ability to write the characters I aspire to achieve.

**GoblinQueeen** - For introducing me to _Total Drama_, the series which is responsible for ending my life as I know it.

---

**Next Up:** Chris, Chef, Jessica, and a special jury pick the winner of the first challenge.


	2. Week 0, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Two

---

**(Week 0, Day 0)**

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "I won't even bother showing you folks the venture to the department store. It was quite a sad sight, just take my word for it. Except for when Owen broke wind so bad that they had to temporarily quarantine the whole place. It was pretty sick! Both figuratively and literally. But we're not allowed to show that footage by order of the government officials on hand. So we're just gonna cut to the students getting their rooms all decorated."

* * *

**(Room One)**

"Thanks for helping me out, you guys," Owen happily said to Geoff and Noah. "I can't wait for my room to become party central around here. It's going to be awesome!"

"No problem, bra," Geoff responded with equal enthusiasm. "Anything to help out a fellow party dude, man. This seventy-inch television is so gonna rock the house."

Owen and Geoff watched with great glee and anticipation as some men were installing a complete entertainment system into one side of the room. Noah just leaned against the door frame, lacking any of the excitement his two fellow students shared. He was thinking how all logic and reason was being thrown out the window to see something like this being done in a room as small as the one they were in. He would have said it aloud, but he then he remembered he already said that when Owen first announced he was buying the TV back at the department store.

"I must say that I'm surprised you still haven't blown all the money you won from Total Drama Island," Noah commented. "Managing to have more than enough to buy this TV and a whole surround sound system set while still having some money left over. I'm impressed."

"I know, huh," Owen said, giggling with joy. "Who would have thought that by saving $100,000 I would be able to use it a couple months later to buy this great set up."

"Most excellent investment, I'll say," Geoff nodded.

Noah rolled his eyes. "Why did I ever sign up for the stupid show in the first place?" he muttered quietly to himself.

* * *

**(Room Two)**

"Would it be okay if you tilt your surfboard just a little more to the left, Bridgette?" Courtney asked.

"More?" Bridgette asked with a raised brow. "Courtney, is it absolutely necessary for my board to be leaning a certain way?"

"Of course it is," Courtney replied without hesitation. "Everything in the room needs to placed in just the right position so that it will all flow together in uniformity."

Bridgette sighed. "Courtney, I'd like to think that I'd want to win this challenge as much as you do," she began to say. "But frankly, I think you're going just a little too far in wanting everything to come off perfect. It's just decorating our dorm room. We're not designing a masterpiece."

"Don't worry, Bridgette," Courtney tried to assure her friend. "We're not going to have the room appear exactly like this throughout our two year stay. It's just that first impressions are so vital sometimes and I don't want to have a repeat of making myself look like an idiot in the first challenge like I did on Total Drama Island."

Bridgette took a look at the room and the way it was laid out at the present moment. In her eyes, everything looked just fine. Then she looked back over to see Courtney looking quite agitated. She had a deep feeling that this attempt at perfection would all be for nothing. Yet at the same time, she really did want to at least try to put forth a winning effort. She sighed and moved her surfboard just a little more to Courtney's left.

* * *

**(Room Three)**

Duncan smirked as he seemingly put the finishing touches to the room. "I guess we won't have too much a problem rooming together, eh Zeke?" he commented aloud. "You mind your own business quietly over there and everything will be just fine."

Ezekiel just nodded nervously, tapping his fingers together and moving his eyes about the room. He was much too afraid to even consider doing anything else.

Duncan caught on to this. After a moment's thought, he rolled his eyes and sighed. "Okay, home school," he said. "What's the matter? Something you don't like about the decorations, but too afraid to speak?"

Ezekiel tried to shrink within himself and pull his toque down. "N-No... not really, eh..." he managed to squeak in response.

He wished to leave it at that, until he saw that his roommate was looking at him with disbelief in his eyes. He really didn't want to say anything in fear that it would result in a beating. But he was sure he was going to get a beating regardless.

"Well... it's just that... everythin' is all... crowded on yer side, eh..." he finally explained.

Duncan raised a curious brow. "And why is that a problem?" he asked.

Ezekiel swallowed. "Th-The room just looks strange... with everthin' on yer side while my side looks all plain and empty," he further said. "I mean... don't you think the judges won't like it, eh?"

"What do you care, prairie boy?" Duncan asked, looking a little annoyed. The kind of look that caused Ezekiel to flinch.

"I-I... just think that... well... the room w'ood look better if you spread the decorations 'oot..." Ezekiel managed to say.

"And you don't mind my stuff being around you at all?" Duncan asked curiously. He watched as his roommate frantically nodded. Duncan then took a good look at the room and how his decorations were organized. "Hmmm... It does make the room look like two juvie cells. And I sure as hell don't want to feel like I'm still there. Tell you what, since you're alright with the decorations I'll let you spread them out."

Ezekiel was rather hesitant to accept this unexpected offer. He had a feeling deep down that this was actually a trap so that Duncan could pummel him for arranging the room in a way that is not to his liking. "A-Are you sure, eh?" he asked nervously.

"However you arrange the place, it'll definitely ensure that it won't look like my old home away from home," Duncan stated as his reply. "So I'll be content with how you dress the room up. Just don't break anything, alright?"

* * *

**(Room Four)**

"Look what I found at the department store!" Sadie squealed with excitement. "There were, like, a whole line of these really cute teddy bears! All in different colors!"

"Oh my gosh, they're so precious!" Lindsay squealed in return, looking at the teddy bears her roommate held in her arms. "They'll so make this room look, like, really adorable!"

"And you know the best part?" Sadie asked, literally hopping up and down with joy. "When they're lined up on the desk between the beds, they make this really cute rainbow effect. So we can keep the pink sheets!"

The two girls squealed at a deafening tone over this wonderous revelation. Any one who had the misfortunate of passing by their room would have certainly suffered.

* * *

**(Room Five)**

"I get the feeling this is going to be a recurring theme the next two years," Noah noted aloud as he took a good look at the room. "Because, to be perfectly honest, I'm quite surprised the room actually looks not half that bad."

"I told ya the room would look pretty gnarly, man," Geoff said proudly. "When you've thrown as many parties as I have, you get a good sense of where something should go so that they would look appealing and not clash."

"Interesting," Noah commented. "I guess there's more to throwing a party then just having food, drinks, music, and people. If you really want to host a party to be remembered, you have to figure the science in putting one together."

"Sh'yeah, bra," Geoff nodded in agreement. "Any one can throw a party. But to throw the best parties, you have to make sure the foundations are in place. So why not apply that idea to the way our room is decorated."

Noah tapped his chin while taking another good look at how the room looked. He was mentally taking in all that his roommate had explained and found that, in a way, it made sense. He was impressed. "You know, this whole being roommates thing just might work," he muttered aloud. "Not quite the beginning of a beautiful friendship, mind you. But it'll be tolerable."

* * *

**(Room Six)**

Beth's concerns of having to room with Izzy were slowly starting to become justifed. While she was thankful that her bed and drawers were relatively untouched, the rest of the room was a jungle.

A real, true-to-life jungle.

Complete with trees, vines, dirt, grass, a mini-waterfall under the window. There were even a couple parrots flying about. Beth was quite scared about how she would react waking up every morning for the next two years to this. She was sure that she would on more than one occasion have trouble finding the door.

"Um..." Beth managed to mutter sheepishly. "I-Izzy...?" She looked around nervously, trying to find her roommate somewhere within all of the green that surrounded her.

Quite suddenly, she was startled when she heard the familiar Tarzan cry. Out of nowhere, Izzy popped up behind her. Beth literally screamed and jumped away before turning to get a good look at her roommate. Izzy was beating on her chest as she completed the familiar cry, looking quite proud in the leopard skin loincloth and top she was wearing.

"Izzy, Queen of Jungle!" the redhead cried, doing her best Tarzan imitation while retaining much of her natural voice. "Be not afraid of jungle. Jungle home for Beth."

Beth swallowed nervously. She began to wonder if it was such a good idea to have joined the show in the first place now that it had led her to being in her present predicament. She also wondered if any prize from the prize pile back in the amphitheater was worth having to live in this room for two years.

* * *

**(Room Seven)**

"Just about done..." DJ quietly noted aloud. With a smile on his face, he took the picture and taped it in the one open spot remaining on the wall. It had fit perfectly in place. "There we go."

His side of the room was literally covered in various pictures of Bunny. The vast majority of which were nothing more than shots of the rabbit staring oh so innocently at the camera. There were a couple "action" shots, but they were few and far between. The one picture that stood out upon the Wall of Bunny was the one he had just added last.

The picture of his mother.

He let out a loving sigh at the hard work he had done putting everything together. After allowing himself a moment to gently pet Bunny, he decided to look over and see how his roommate was decorating his side of the room.

Apparently, Justin had the same idea. Cover his side of the room with various pictures. Only it was pictures of himself. Each one saw the hunk in a different pose, not one ever the same despite the change in background. And it seemed that Justin still had plenty of photos left to use.

"Say DJ, I was wondering," Justin began to say. He had not once turned away from admiring his images to even face his roommate. "Do you mind if I place some of my pictures on any spot you might have left over on your side?"

* * *

**(Room Eight)**

"I don't see what the problem is, girl," LeShawna said with a raised brow. "It's just a poster."

"I know," Katie said, sounding quite nervous to even be questioning her roommate's decorations in the first place. "But it clashes with everything else in the room. I'm not saying take it down, but the room would look so much better with it there."

LeShawna took a good look at the poster and then examined the room. She will be the first to admit that she was never one with an eye for room detail and therefore could not understand why Katie felt it was a bad idea for the poster to be just above the foot of her bed. Then again, this half of the would-be twins was considered the more fashion-minded. Even if that meant she was probably responsible for picking out those faux zebra skin tops.

"So you say the poster makes the room clash by putting it here," LeShawna noted aloud. "Alright girl, where do you think it should go so it won't do that."

"Just above the head of your bed," Katie answered after taking a good look of what was laid out on LeShawna's side of the room. "And I think there's plenty of room for the picture to go a few inches above the poster."

"For real?" LeShawna asked. She happened to like the picture of her family right near her. Having it above the poster was just too far away from her. Knowing that Katie might pout that the thought of rejecting the placement of the poster though, LeShawna looked to see if there was a place that the picture might work while keep it near her. "What if I put the picture above the side of the bed and move the little banner over a few inches?"

Katie looked at the space on LeShawna's side in question and tried to picture it in her mind. Then she shrugged and smiled. "I think that can work," she replied.

"Whew," LeShawna exhaled. "Glad to know it can."

* * *

**(Room Nine)**

"_A lucky room for a lucky guy..._" Trent quietly sung to himself while decorating his side of the room. Occasionally, he would look over and examine Tyler's side of the room.

The plan was that they would place evenly matched objects at or near a spot parallel to the other. If Tyler put up a picture near the head of the bed, Trent would do something similar over at his end. If Trent placed a poster over the center area of the bed, Tyler would follow suit. To match with any sports banner Tyler would put up, Trent would use a picture or poster of a motorcycle that was equal in size to the banner.

"_Fate has made it so..._" Trent continued to sing as he adjusted the position of his motorcycle poster accordingly.

"What'cha singing about, dude?" Tyler asked curiously as he hung a framed picture of Lindsay near the head of his bed.

"Oh, nothing really," Trent replied with a shrug. "Whenever I find myself verbalizing my thoughts, I end up sound like I'm singing. It's kinda silly because they don't rhyme, you know."

"Uh, okay," Tyler commented in confusion. That wasn't exactly the answer he was looking for. "Whatever. So... what'cha mean from what you're singing?"

"Ah, I see what you're saying," Trent said in realization. He chuckled sheepishly for a little bit. "I'm just happy that I got assigned to this room. Room nine."

"That some kinda lucky number for you or something?" Tyler asked.

"Absolutely," Trent replied. The music man stepped back after putting the finishing touches to his side of the room. He examined all that he had put up and smiled proudly. "Perfect. Nine decorations."

He didn't notice his roommate staring at him with a rather disturbed look on his face.

* * *

**(Room Ten)**

"What the hell is with the tape?" Eva asked with a raised brow.

"Look, we both don't like each other," Heather began to explain as she laid down duct tape in the middle of the room. "We don't even each other's company. So let's just separate ourselves as much as possible so neither one of us will get in the other's way. Would that sound fair to you?"

Eva thought about it and then just shrugged. "Whatever," she said. "Just don't bug me and we won't have any problems."

"Fine," Heather snapped back. She was putting down the last line when she heard a series of loud clanks. She looked up to see her roommate literally dropping her weights into a pile. "Do you mind keeping it down a little?"

"You have a problem with what I do on my side of the room?" Eva asked with a glare.

Heather was about the answer when she immediately stopped herself. She almost forgot who she was dealing with. And she knew that Eva was the last person she ever wanted to get on the bad side of. Given how quickly her roommate could lose her temper, it was definitely better to just keep to herself.

"No... not at all..." Heather managed to utter in a quiet tone.

"Good," Eva growled before she resumed in unpacking all her weights.

* * *

**(Room Eleven)**

"So, let me see if I got this correct," Cody said while putting up another poster on his side of the room. "The same model of Cylons appear in the series, but they're referred to as Centurions because they're obviously not the only model of Cylons."

"Right," Harold confirmed. He too was putting up another poster on his side of the wall.

The two appeared to care less about how the room looked. It was more about making sure everything they liked was where they wanted them to be regardless of whether or not they made the room clash. It was all about being happy with how the room came out to them and not to any one else. But at the present moment, how their room was decorated was clearly secondary to the conversation they were quite engaged in.

"So, among the other Cylon models are twelve that are humanoids," Cody continued. "Seven of them revealed over the course of the series while the final five are a big secret to even the other humanoids."

"Correct," Harold nodded.

"And a great deal of the series is based around finding out if any of those humanoid Cylons are in the fleet?" Cody asked.

"Sweet, huh?" Harold commented. "It's like Blade Runner set to a military story in space. It's really cool, actually."

"Maybe," Cody noted. "I mean, I really like the older version my dad was a fan of. It was pure sci-fi fun. This one sounds all serious and dramatic. Even complex."

"But that's part of why this version is awesome," Harold reasoned. "It establishes itself as its own series while paying respect and homage to the original. Richard Hatch, the original Apollo, appears in the new version as a political antagonist."

"Wow," Cody mused. "That's rather intense. Hope Owen will let us watch your DVDs on his TV because now I want to see this version of the show."

* * *

**(Room Twelve)**

"Girlfriend, seeing your room is like a breath of fresh air," LeShawna commented aloud. "I mean, I like Katie and she ain't Heather, but boy goes that girl loses her cool anytime her fashion-minded eye comes into play. It's throwing off my groove watching her getting all worried about where my stuff is placed."

"Oh believe me, that's nothing compared to Courtney," Bridgette noted. "She was in her perfectionist mode the whole time. Wanting to make absolutely sure everything was where it was supposed to be. No leeway whatsoever if something is just slightly off. They need to be in the right place in the right position. I had to reposition my surfboard five times before she was satisfied with he leaning over the foot of my bed in a thirty-five degree angle."

"For real?" LeShawna asked in disbelief. "It had to be in a thirty-five degree angle? Man, that girl is just straight up tripping."

"Well, just know that it's like that only for the challenge," Gwen said as she skimmed through the paintings in her portfolio. "It's like you mentioned, she'll be fine with you readjusting the room more comfortably when at the end of this."

Having finished their end of decorating their rooms, Bridgette and LeShawna decided to immediately hang out with Gwen. They offered to help her in arranging her room, but she said that all that was left was putting her paintings up. Bridgette and LeShawna both raised curious brows, seeing as how extremely plain looking the room felt, but didn't really mind all that much. Not after what they had to deal with for their rooms.

"I'm not sure Katie will mind me setting my things straight, though," LeShawna mentioned, shaking her head with a sigh. "She seemed very uncomfortable with how I was doing. Looking like she was about to cry or something."

"All the more reason I should be glad I don't have a roommate, huh?" Gwen chuckled as she pulled a painting out. "I doubt there would be too many girls here who would like the way I design my room." She began placing the picture into one of the frames she had bought specifically for her artwork.

"They would probably be more surprised than anything," Bridgette said. "It's not as dark as even I was expecting it to be."

"Wait until you see the paintings I decide to hang up," Gwen said.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "I really am happy that I got a room to myself. If nothing else, I get some form of privacy. Even though the only time the cameras will stop rolling in the dorms will be from midnight to six. Still, at least I don't have to put up with people unless I want them to. Plus, I don't have to deal with a someone having a problem with Trent visiting. And that's the way I like it."

Trent - "After Total Drama Island, Gwen and I found out we lived two hours apart from each other. She was sad that our relationship would have to be a long-distance one. My buds talked me into going to a party one weekend. An hour in, I was bored. And I missed Gwen. So, I got on my motorcycle and made the two hour trip. She was quite surprised, especially since she was running the house for the night while her brother hosted a sleep over with a couple of his friends. But she was also touched. That I was willing to drive two hours on a motorcycle at night simply to be with her. Since then, I've been driving over and spending every weekend hanging with her and her family."

Gwen - "I've borrowed mom's car to drive up a number of weekends so that Trent won't go broke just to visit me. His parents appeared to accept me, I guess. I really don't know what they think about me whenever I'm not around. I just know my mom is beyond ecstatic I have a boyfriend. She's even more happy that he's not a goth like me. She doesn't even mind that he crashes on the couch every time he drives up."

Trent - "My parents were concerned at first while they were watching the show. They probably thought I'd start turning into a goth like her. But after meeting Gwen the first time, they started getting more comfortable with my being in a relationship with her. She has that affect on people, if you ask me. They were a little unsure about her having to spend the night over whenever she drove up, but stop minding after the first couple of times. They did make sure I was a gentleman by letting her sleep in my bed while I sleep on the couch. Perfectly fine with me, as long as I get to see her beautiful face in the morning for breakfast."

Cody - "You know, in all honesty... I haven't really been doing a good job getting over my crush for Gwen. I mean, she's more than happy with Trent. I think there's real love there. How can I compete with that?" /_Let's out a heavy sigh._/ "She's so hot, you know. Hotter than most of those girls who try to fix themselves up as being sexy. I just wish I can figure how to move on."

* * *

"Boys and girls, your five hours is up," Jessica announced. She walked down the hallway and knocked on each door along the way. "It's time for all of you to come out and face your judgment at the hands of myself, Chris, and Chef Hatchet."

One by one, the twenty-two students emerged from their rooms. They all stood right beside their doors, as if lining up for an official inspection than one that was a show challenge. Jessica counted the heads to make sure everyone was there. She paused upon looking at a smiling Izzy, still in her leopard skin loincloth and top. The R.A. stared for a moment then shrugged.

"At least you're not in class," she noted. Izzy cackled triumphantly.

"Good evening, students!" Chris called as he appeared in the hallway with Chef Hatchet. "I hope you people are happy with the way your room has been arranged because it is now time to decide who is going to get rewarded this week and who is going to be suffering next week. Hang tight while we take a good look at how you did."

The students stood back and watched as Chris, Chef, and Jessica began to examine each room in order. Chris and Chef muttered in quiet voices their impressions. Too quiet for the students to hear. Jessica showed no emotion and just scribbled on her clipboard. A few students started to worry as they saw this. They were also worried as the three judges gave little indication as to whether or not they liked what they've been seeing thus far. At least, until they got to room four.

"Aaaaahhh!" Chris and Chef screamed at the same time. "The cuteness!" They immediately covered their eyes and turned away so as not to look at the room any further. A number of the students began to chuckle at the scene that they had just witnessed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Lindsay - "Oh my gosh, they said that Sally and mine's room was cute! They so loved it!"

Katie and Sadie - Katie - "You are, like, so going to win this, Sadie!"  
Sadie - "I know, right? This is so exciting!"  
Together - "Eeeeeeeeee!"

Chef Hatchet - "That room was so pink it made me wanna barf!"

* * *

After spending a moment to regain their composure, Chris and Chef rejoined Jessica at room five to continue their examination of the rooms. When they stopped at room six, the two men raised curious brows. Their eyes first went to Izzy, who wore a giant grin on her face, then to Jessica.

"Parrots are acceptable pets," the R.A. said with a shrug. "And it's her responsibility to maintain the place. Since there's no one living underneath, the school probably won't have a problem with it."

Chris and Chef weren't sure if they should be okay with her explanation. In the end, they just shrugged and moved on to the next room. They went back to being difficult for the students to read until they finished examining room twelve. The three judges went back to the beginning of the hall. They huddled together and were comparing their thoughts and Jessica's notes. It took about five minutes before they turned to the students.

"Okay, students!" Chris announced. "We have made our decisions. Remember, the occupants of the rooms we didn't like will be going into next week's challenge with some kind of disadvantage. The occupants of the rooms we liked get to decorate the living space. The occupant of the room chosen by our special jury will be rewarded from our prize pile back in the amphitheater."

"You still haven't mentioned who this special jury is," Cody noted.

"What's the point in calling them our special jury if keep their identities concealed until the end?" Chris questioned in his menacing way. "Now then, let's start with the losers. And I have to say, the second I saw this room it was quite obvious to me that it had loser written all over it. And that room is...

...

...

...

"Room seven."

"Aw, man," DJ sighed in defeated. Justin looked quite saddened himself. "For real?"

"Yes, for real," Chris said, sounding quite annoyed. "Seriously, that room was the most disturbing sight I had ever seen in my life. Endless pictures of rabbit and man candy. Only one female in the midst of all that and it was DJ's mother! Really sad, dudes."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "What surprised me is that it was Chris who picked room seven as a losing room. You'd think someone as egotistical and narcissistic as him would be okay with the sea of self-love Justin had going on."

* * *

"Chef," Chris said to the cook. "Which room did you dislike the most?"

"Well, you already picked room eight so I gotta pick something else," Chef began to reply. "And I might as well pick the obvious one of the bunch. Room ten."

"How were we supposed to design even an average looking room with the two of us roomed together?" Heather complained. "Our personalities are so different, there's no way we could get any sort of cohesive decorating!"

"True, but you didn't have to make it so blatant," Chef pointed out. "Tough girl's side looks more like a gym than a room while mean girl's side looks like one of them crappy queen bee bedrooms from those stupid teen movies you kids watch. Plus, you used duct tape to make a dividing line in the center of the room. That's a waste of good tape, girl!" Heather just scoffed in anger while Eva didn't even seem to care whatsoever.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "Was there any doubt Heather and Eva were gonna have a losing room? Chef Hatchet just earned a little more respect from me for not only putting Heather with Eva, but choosing her as a loser on the first day. I am loving this!"

* * *

"So we have DJ, Justin, Eva, and Heather as the occupants of losing rooms," Chris gleefully noted aloud. "Who will be joining them in having to compete next week with a handicap? Let's ask your R.A., Jessica!"

Jessica appeared not to have comprehended anything Chris had said. She seemed quite busy scribbling in her clipboard. Seconds later, she finished whatever it was that she was writing, placed the clipboard under her right arm, and looked up rather confidently at everyone in the hallway.

"Room one," she announced.

Most of the students were quite shocked to say the least. Owen moaned in sorrow, having lost a challenge at all.

"But... Owen had the most awesome hook ups," Geoff said in defense of his fellow party animal. "How could he have a losing room when he had a seventy inch TV and the most gnarly surround sound system I've ever seen?"

"Aside from his bed, those were the only furniture he had in his room," Jessica explained. She sounded rather unsympathetic. "When I watch television, I'd like to be sitting on a chair or a couch. Not the floor. And I most especially would not like to sit on a floor that is littered with someone's dirty clothes."

"Harsh," Chris commented. "Sorry, Owen my man. But I'm afraid this wasn't your day."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "None of us saw Owen losing this challenge. Sure he probably wouldn't have won, but we didn't think someone would dislike it. If any thing, some of us expected Lindsay and Sadie's room to be the other loser because of how sickeningly cute it was."

* * *

"Okay, I think we could all use a little boost in sunshine after some dark depression," Chris announced. "Time to announce the rooms we liked. And my favorite room is going to be quite the surprise. Because I choose...

...

...

...

"Room three."

"Really?" Duncan and Ezekiel cried together in disbelief.

Their shock paled in comparison to that expressed by most of the girls. They were in utter disbelief that Chris picked the sexist as having a good room. Heather had an additional problem with the choice.

"But their room was completely the punk delinquent from top to bottom," she argued in frustration. "There was barely anything about home school anywhere in there."

"True, it screamed all Duncan and no Ezekiel," Chris explained. "But it was how the room was decorated and arranged that really impressed me the most. I gotta say, Zeke, you have quite the eye for detail and design. You made the room look really wicked compared to how it would've been left in Duncan's hands. I look forward to seeing how you do with the living space."

"Um... thanks?" Ezekiel squeaked, still overcome with shock at the compliments he received.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "What the hell kind of crap is this? Their room is picked as a favorite just because he likes how the sexist prairie boy arranged the room? This is absolute b--/**censored**/! I hate you, Chris McLean!"

Chris - "I can live with that."

* * *

"So now we know Duncan and Ezekiel have qualified for a chance to win a reward from our prize pile," the handsome host commented. "Chef, who will be joining them?"

"The occupants of the room that impressed me the most," Chef began to answer in his best announcer voice. "And those would be the ones from room two."

Courtney let out a deafening cry of victory. It was quite loud that Bridgette had to cover her eyes. Nonetheless, she was just as happy as her friend and roommate. The effort paid off and they were one step closer to winning the challenge.

"How about that?" Duncan cheered. "Looks like you and I are quite the room decorators, princess." He immediately swept his girlfriend into his arms, embracing her quite happily.

"Duncan!" Courtney shouted, her cheeks burning hotter every second she was in his arms. "Put me down!" She didn't put up any real physical effort into making him release her.

Bridgette chuckled lightly at the sight of the pair before turning her attention to Duncan's roommate. She could see that Ezekiel was extremely nervous in having to face her at all.

"Uh..." the formally home schooled boy muttered in his unsuccessful attempt to say something. "Uh... c-congra'dru'lations... eh?"

The surfer girl could see in his eyes that he was being rather honest. She could also see that he was quite afraid of his kind act being shot down by her in the belief that she still held a grudge for what he said back at Camp Wawanakwa. She formed and gentle smile and gave him a light pat on the shoulder.

"Same to you," she said.

Ezekiel nervously managed to form a small smile.

Seconds later, Bridgette found herself scooped into the arms of her boyfriend Geoff. In no time at all, the couple engaged in the latest round of passionate kissing. Courtney was not quite as willing to follow suit with Duncan. At least, not in public.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

DJ - "Courtney might as well just give in and make out with Duncan no matter if people are looking or not. Everybody knows those two are dating. Why is she continuing to pretend they ain't?"

* * *

"All this hot romance is cool and everything," Chris said after clearing his voice to bring the attention back to him. "But there's still one more room to be chosen. May we have the honors, Jessica?"

Everyone turned to the R.A. They were now more curious than ever to know which room she picked as her favorite. If she disliked Owen's room, than she obviously chose something that would appear quite the opposite of what the jolly oaf had. She gave out a little cough and formed a smirk with her lips.

"Room twelve," she said.

Many of the students were quite flabbergasted. Even Gwen was caught off guard. Though she managed to wither the shock in an instant and smile proudly. She was joined seconds later by her happy boyfriend, who wrapped his arms over her shoulders and gently pulled her into a celebratory hug.

"You picked weird goth girl?" Heather cried in fury. She was clearly losing it. "It's so plain looking! Just her bed, a couch, a love seat, desk, drawer, and her stupid paintings! How could you like that over a more decorated room like Beth and Izzy's? That one was a real jungle!"

"Yes, Gwen's room was a straightforward simple design," Jessica began to answer. "But it's how those simple things came off in the end. You may not like her paintings, but I think they're marvelous. And where they were positioned make the room look fantastic. You don't need a whole lot of things to make a grand impression. Not to say room six was bad, it was very creative and unique. I just liked twelve better."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Seems like this Jessica chick is going to be a little tough to figure out. She hated Owen's room for the lack of furniture, but she liked Gwen's room for its simplicity. She appears very strict about the rules at times, yet she's real lenient about allowing us some personal freedoms. I wonder if I should be suspicious of her..."

Lindsay - /_Pouting._/ "But... But Carl and Chevy said Sadie and I had a cute room..."

Katie and Sadie - Sadie - /_Sobbing._/ "I didn't win!"  
Katie - "Don't cry, Sadie. Your room is still so cute. And at least they gave it a compliment."  
Sadie - "You're right. They complimented my room. And that's better than losing!"

Jessica - "Had Owen put at least a couch in his room, I might have considered picking Lindsay and Sadie's instead as my least favorite room. It was way too girly for me and apparently for both Chris and Chef, too. Those girls were lucky some of the others fouled up as badly as they did."

* * *

Izzy peered into Gwen's room and gave out a low whistle. "Those paintings are really cool, actually," she said. "It's like opening up a dead jaguar and exposing its heart. Intense to see at first, but able to appreciate the beauty within. I don't mind those winning over my room. Don't you guys agree?" There was a long silence in response as everyone just stared at her. Most were quite disturbed to say the least.

"I'll... take that as a compliment, Izzy..." Gwen managed to say with a raised brow.

"Alright, so there we have it," Chris announced, looking to take back control of the mood in the atmosphere. "The occupants of our three favorite rooms are Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, Ezekiel, and Gwen. You five will be responsible for decorating the living space as you see fit. As for who had the winning room... it's time for our special jury to decide."

In mere seconds, Chef appeared pushing a cart that had a television mounted on top into the hallway. He placed it next to Chris and then turned the TV on. Everyone watched to see what appeared to be their amphitheater packed with screaming and cheering bodies. Given that they were all wearing the school unifroms, it was reasonable to assume they were all students.

Chris revealed a microphone in hand and spoke into it, seemingly so that his voice would be heard to the audience jammed in the amphitheater. "Greetings, freshman class of Richmore Academy!" he said. The television showed the overwhelming excitement the students had for being mentioned supposedly on television. "We thank you all for participating in the opening challenge of Total Drama Academy to serve as our special jury!"

"That's the freshman class?" Cody asked, looking quite frightened at the sight of just how many there were. "You mean there's at least four times that many students smart enough to be here?"

"Not quite," Jessica answered. "About half end up getting cut before advancing into sophomore year either because they couldn't keep up their grades or they broke one too many rules. The freshman class generally make up about a third of the student body on average. But that's something the school officials don't like to talk about too much."

"So how can they properly judge the rooms when they're in the amphitheater?" Beth asked.

"There's a big screen on the stage over there that they're watching, shortie," Chef answered. "Now shush so Chris can explain to them what they're supposed to do."

"Under your seats are voting devices," Chris said to the audience. "You only get one vote, so you better be sure about who you want to win. So which room do you students like the best? Room two with Bridgette and Courtney? Room three with Duncan and Ezekiel? Or room twelve with Gwen? Cast your votes... now!"

The twenty-two students watched the television screen as they witnessed the freshman class reach under their seats and pull out the voting devices they were to use. The camera didn't make any zooms or close-ups to see if they could get some clue as to which room was receiving votes. It was another five minutes before someone handed Chris a piece of paper. The handsome host read the contents and smiled.

"The votes are in!" he announced in the microphone, resulting in the television showing the cheering and excitement the freshman class displayed. "And I have to say, you guys are awesome! The votes were so close, we could have had a three-way tie here!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "I can understand people liking Bridgette and Courtney's room. Theirs was at least reasonably decent. But who in their right mind would dare like the criminal and sexist pig's room or even weird goth girl's? Don't they have any taste? I don't care how beneficial this school will be for my career, I'm starting to hate this place more and more!"

* * *

"Seriously, this is a tight-race," Chris said with a chuckle. "First place had thirty-five percent of the vote, second had thirty-three, and third had thirty-two. I'm so loving the drama here!"

"Come on," Duncan complained. "Just tell us who won already."

"Patience," Chris said. "I'm gonna so build the suspense here because it's that awesome." He cleared his throat and straightened the paper in his hands, doing all he can to bother the twenty-two students before him. "In third place was...

...

...

...

"Room three."

Duncan rolled his eyes in annoyance. "You just had to waste time to do that," he muttered. Ezekiel exhaled and hung his head in defeat. Duncan saw this and sighed. "Dude, you did your best. Don't beat yourself up for not winning."

"I kn'oo," the prairie boy uttered. "I guess... I really hoped we had a chance an' all..."

"Weren't you paying attention?" Noah asked in his every cynical attitude. "The votes were really close. You had as good of a chance as the others to win this."

"Moving on," Chris said, bringing the attention back to him. "So it comes down to two rooms. Bridgette and Courtney's room against Gwen's room." Courtney was on the verge of chewing her nails off in anticipation. Bridgette was rubbing her hands together a lot harder than ever. Gwen just crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, wanting the hose to get the whole thing over with. "The winner of the first challenge of Total Drama Academy... with thirty-five percent of the freshman class of Richmore Academy voting... is..."

...

...

...

...

...

"Room twelve! Gwen is the sole winner of the challenge!"

Gwen's immediate reaction was that her eyes shot wide open in surprise. Moments later, she found herself scooped into Trent's arms as he gave her a celebratory embrace. Being in his hug caused her to smile a little and was soon closing her eyes and returning the hug, chuckling at winning.

"You're the best, babe," Trent cheered, wanting to be quiet enough so that only she could hear him.

"I guess so," she said back, sinking herself deeper into his embrace.

On the television screen, the freshman class packed in the amphitheater were cheering wildly. While some reason that they were happy Gwen won, the camera panned to show that there was a big screen on the stage and it was showing the couple in their hug. The romantic sight drove the students, particularly the girls, crazy with excitement.

The rest of the students in the hallway reacted as they would normally to Gwen winning a challenge. Most were okay, a few even clapping in celebration. Heather crossed her arms and raised her nose up, scoffing at the winner's happiness. Courtney pouted and hung virtually her entire upper body at having lost the challenge.

"I was so close..." the C.I.T. whispered.

"Come on, Courtney," Bridgette said, rubbing her roommate's back for reassurance. "It's just a challenge. You don't have to win all the time. Having the second best decorated room is not that bad."

"And there's another consolation, too," Duncan whispered, managing to sneak up behind Courtney with a rather wicked grin on his face. "With the way you and I finished, you can say that we're the best couple here."

"You pig!" Courtney hissed, slapping one of Duncan's arms that had been quietly wrapped around her waist. The blush upon her freckles and her cheeks, however, showed that she appreciated his moral support.

She even allowed him to kiss her on the cheek without any complaints.

"Oh, is that how it's going to be, huh?" Bridgette teased. "Well, just because you guys managed to place second and third in this challenge does not make you the best couple. Right, Geoff?"

"Let's show them how it's really done, Bridge!" Geoff cheered. Seconds later, Bridgette had leaped onto him as they proceeded to make out as heated and passionately as ever.

"Guys, you can get with the loving in a minute!" Chris called out. "We need to wrap this up." He cleared his throat once he had everyone's attention. "So congratulations, Gwen, on winning the opening challenge of Total Drama Academy. You will get to spear-head decorating the living space with Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, and Ezekiel helping out. As for your reward, you get to choose from one of the follow three prizes from our prize pile."

Chris pointed to the television screen as the camera zoomed onto the stage of the amphitheater. The curtain was raised and revealed three items that appeared separated from the pile of prizes.

"You can choose from a state of the art mini-fridge," the handsome host said, after which a spotlight appeared over the aforementioned prize. "A Gateway laptop." A second spotlight shined upon the mentioned prize. "Or a custom built Harley Davidson motorcycle." A third spotlight appeared, pointing at the final prize.

"Aww, man," Trent quietly moaned. "If I had known that would be one of the prizes in this challenge, I would've really tried harder to win this one."

Gwen giggled at her boyfriend's misfortune. "Sorry, Trent," she said. "I know you want the motorcycle, but I'm gonna have to take the mini-fridge as my prize."

"And there you have it, folks," Chris announced into the microphone. "Gwen has selected the state of the art mini-fridge. Don't let the size fool you, this baby can pack enough food to last a month. And it's freezer compartment is perfect for storing any ice cream delights to sooth those midnight cravings. Not a bad choice, Gwen.

"Freshman class of Richmore Academy, we'd like to thank you again for taking part as the special jury in this week's challenge. I'm sure you will get a chance to meet your favorite Total Drama celebrity sometime during their two-year tenure at this school. But we would appreciate it if you scoot your butts out of the amphitheater at this time. Still, let's give it up one more time for our winner, Gwen, and the other finalists, Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, and Ezekiel!"

The television monitor showed the camera panning over the cheering freshman class packed in the amphitheater. A number were even holding up signs supporting their favorite Total Drama student. Moments later, however, Chef turned off the television set.

"Chef will personally deliver your mini-fridge shortly, Gwen," Chris said as the supposed former marine left for the amphitheater. "Let Jessica know whenever you and the other four have your ideas for the living space mapped out. The producers will sponge for whatever money you need to make it happen. As for the rest of you, I'll see you all next week. DJ, Eva, Heather, Justin, and Owen, you guys better get yourselves prepared as you'll be competing next week with a disadvantage. Until then, have a good first week at school, kids!"

The handsome host made his exit out of the hall, leaving the twenty-two students and their R.A. to themselves. The students looked rather perplexed as to what they should do next. Jessica watched the scene for a moment before letting a sigh.

"I guess I could get some pizza delivered for tonight," she said with a shrug. "And I bet you'll want to party in Owen's room. Just remember what I said about the noise level." She pulled out her cell phone and made a call to a pizza parlor she knew while most of the others cheered and headed directly into room one.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "Design-wise, I may not have liked Owen's room. But even I will admit that it's been perfectly set up to be the hot spot if someone wanted to throw a party around here. Who am I to deny him some fun every now and then? And I didn't mind calling in for pizza, either. After all, it's not coming out of my pocket."

Chris - "One of the negatives with choosing Jessica as the group's R.A. was her natural sense of being able to avoid getting screwed legally. She made sure to study the hell out of her contract and triple-check the fine print before signing on. So whenever she's supplying something for the group, like a pizza party or even dinner at a five-star restaurant, it's the producers who are paying for them and not her. Oh well. Can't win them all."

* * *

Gwen stuck around at the party long enough for a few slices of pizza before retreating back to her room. Once she arranged the mini-fridge in a spot that made her content, she slipped into her nightgown, pulled out her sketchbook, and began to doodle on her bed. Moments later, she heard her door being knocked upon.

Since there were nine knocks, she knew immediately who it was. She never got the chance to ask Trent why he knocked nine times, but she felt no rush to discover the answer. As a matter of fact, she kind of liked it. He was the only one who would knock that many times, thereby let her know that it was him. Not to mention he also attempted to knock in a musical rhythm.

Gwen got up and walked over to the door. She opened slowly, making sure to confirm that it was her boyfriend. Recognizing the familiar figure standing before her, she gently leaned on the door and smiled.

"Snagged you a muffin, beautiful," he said, revealing a blueberry muffin in his right hand. This made the goth girl swoon happily.

"Aww, you shouldn't have, handsome," she said. Even though she was in her nightgown, she opened the door wider so as to allow her boyfriend to enter.

"I also brought a couple cups and a bottle of cream soda," Trent said, revealing a bad in his left hand after entering her room. "Figured maybe you and I could celebrate in private."

"Sounds like a good idea," Gwen said after closing the door.

She watched as he poured cream soda into the cups and placed the bottle into her mini-fridge. They toasted and took a sip of their drink until he slipped a free around around her waist. She placed her free hand on his shoulder and then laid her head upon his chest, sighing blissfully. They began to slowly sway as if dancing to a tone they could only hear.

"So what are we celebrating again?" Gwen teased with a light giggle.

"Well, winning the challenge for one," Trent began to answer with a chuckle. "Getting yourself a very useful mini-fridge, for another. But I think there's something more important to celebrate."

"Oh?" she said with a gentle sigh. "And what would that be?"

"Our being together," he replied softly. "No more two hour drives. We can just walk across the hallway. And now we can see each other everyday, not just on the weekends."

"There are classes and Chris' challenges that will get in the way," Gwen noted.

"Sure," Trent responded. "But that's only for just a few hours on the weekdays. The rest of the time, we can spend it together whenever we want. And with you having a room to yourself, no one will be disturbing our peace."

Gwen let out another happy swoon before looking up to meet her handsome boyfriend's green eyes with a smile on her lips. He had one on, too. They lost themselves in the sight of one another before slowly and gently leaning in for a sweet and gentle kiss.

* * *

Props to **Intrigued Soul** for reminding me of Trent's lucky number. It was so right there in my face and it didn't even register until she pointed it out. Certainly helped me figure how to write his scene with Tyler a lot better, that's for sure.

For any one wondering, since I made romance as a primary genre, here's the pairings I'm can reveal at the moment: **Gwen**/**Trent**, **Courtney**/**Duncan**, **Bridgette**/**Geoff**, **Lindsay**/**Tyler**, **Harold**/**LeShawna**, **Izzy**/**Owen**. Obviously there'll be others, but it's a secret right now.

---

**Next Up:** The students take the entrance exam.


	3. Week 1, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Three

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Previously on Total Drama Academy...

We didn't have enough applicants in time for a second season of Total Drama Island. So the producers and I decided to bring the original twenty-two campers back on camera. In addition, a really swank boarding school in Kitchener, Ontario opened their doors to us for some cheap publicity. Naturally, we jumped all over it. So now we have a show in which we follow the campers as they spend two years studying at Richmore Academy.

We ran down as much information they needed to know as possible while trying to give them a look at the school, drop them into their dorms, get the required school uniforms, and introduce them to their R.A. Jessica. All of this before making them do a challenge on their first day. It was a fairly easy one, sprucing up their rooms to the liking of myself, Chef Hatchet, and Jessica. Some, like DJ and Justin, Eva and Heather, and Owen, did so poorly it was sad. Beth and Izzy, though more so Izzy than Beth, turned their room into an actual jungle and still didn't make tops.

It came down to Bridgette and Courtney, Duncan and Ezekiel, and solo Gwen whose rooms would be judged by the freshman class of the school. In the end, they chose Gwen's room, which had simple arrangements that were highlighted by some rather unique, if not disturbing, paintings. For her prize, she picked the mini-fridge over the laptop. Baffling, really. But I guess any prize won was secondary compared to having more time to spend in the loving arms of her music man Trent. Aren't they just too cute?

The students are about to experience their first week studying at Richmore Academy. But before they do, they'll be taking an entrance exam to see if any of them are smart enough to be actual students here. After that, yours truly will return Friday evening for the second of our weekly challenges. And I can assure you that this one will be a doozy. For me!

Who will pass the entrance exam?

Will they survive their first day at school?

What horrors will I be unleashing upon them?

Find out in the most dramatic episode yet, of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

_

* * *

_**(Week 1, Day 1 - Saturday)**

Bridgette slipped out of her room, controlling herself enough so that her yawning would be quiet. Being a surfer, she would occasionally wake up early every once in a while to catch the morning tide. Not quite ready to take a shower yet, especially since she forgot the grab a set of clothes and her towel, she decided to take a good look at the living space. Since she would have some say in decorating it, she figured she should develop ideas to offer Gwen.

Upon arrival, though, she found that she wasn't the only one who was awake at five in the morning. She rubbed her tired eyes a little and focused to see if she could recognize the figure sitting on the couch. Seeing a toque made it perfectly obvious that it was Ezekiel in the living space. With nothing else better to do, she shrugged and tip-toed quietly over toward him. Once she was directly behind the prairie boy, she formed a smirk on her lips.

"Morning, Zeke," she whispered ever so gently.

Just the sound of her voice was more than enough to cause him to squeak in terror and literally leap to the other end of the couch. Eyes shot wide open and every inch of his body shaking, he looked over to see a giggling Bridgette slowly make her way around the arm of the couch to sit down.

"I'm sorry," she said as her giggling began to die down. "I couldn't resist. I didn't mean to scare you that bad."

"O-Oh..." Ezekiel managed to utter quietly. His eyes went back to normal, but he continued to shake even if it was getting slower. He then began to move his hands upward so as to take hold of his toque and possibly pull it down.

"Zeke, there's no need to be scared of me," she said, still smiling in amusement. "I promise, I won't try anything like that again. Please calm down, alright?"

He gripped his toque, but managed to only swallow hard and maintain better control of his shaking. "A-Alright... eh..." he managed to say. His eyes glanced about, as if he was trying to avoid looking at her.

Bridgette sighed. "Zeke, I'm not going to hurt you," she said. "I was just teasing you, okay? Just having some fun."

After sometime, Ezekiel managed to finally get a hold of himself completely. His shaking stopped and he was now able to look at her without feeling shy. Though he still had his hands on his toque.

"I'm..." he began to stammer. "I'm... soo'ry, eh."

"Zeke, you don't need to apologize--" Bridgette began to say, but she was immediately cut off.

"No, no," Ezekiel immediately said. "I mean... What I meant... I'm tryin' to say is... I'm soo'ry about... about what I said... on the first day of the sh'oo, eh..."

Bridgette's smile faded a little, recognizing now that Ezekiel was trying to apologize to her. His nervousness about doing so having skyrocketed thanks to her teasing. She sat back and listened to him continue with his apology.

"I never imagined badly my words w'ood hurt you girls, eh," he said after a heavy sigh. "Havin' never talked with people aside from my parents... I'm so used to talkin' with them... that I never thought ab'oot how words w'oods could hurt feelin's. ... My parents and I... we were so... honest with one an'oother, eh..."

Bridgette noticed that the prairie boy had now released his grip on his toque and dropped his hands down to chest level. His fingers were tapping together as he nervously struggled to say words that would help explain himself while trying not to sound insulting. It made her feel sorry for him that he's having this hard of a time dealing with the consequences.

"I... I tried... apologizin' to you..." he continued. "You know... back at that... place where they sent after gettin' voted off..."

For the first time in listening to him, Bridgette seemed skeptical. Because it didn't look like that to her when they were at Playa Des Losers. It looked like he was trying to hit on her. Even when she was clearly making out with Geoff. "You were trying to apologize to me?" she asked, raising a brow.

Ezekiel nervously darted his eyes all over the place until settling back on her. "Kinda..." he answered. "I... guess I didn't do a good job... lookin' like I wanted to, eh..." A shade a pink began to appear on his cheeks and his hands went straight back to gripping his toque. "It's just... you were the... most approachable of the girls there..."

"Me?" Bridgette asked, not really buying his explanation at this point. "I was the most approachable of the girls?"

"Uh-huh," Ezekiel replied, nodding his head. "I mean, think ab'oot it... Eva w'ood hurt me if I tried to go near her... I don't kn'oo how to talk to those girls who try to look alike... Izzy... I don't kn'oo how to even approach her... Beth was all sad ab'oot havin' takin' that cursed tiki... Courtney was mad ab'oot how she was eliminated... Lindsay was lookin' for Tyler... That just left you..."

Bridgette thought about the reasons he explained for why he didn't go to one of the other girls about apologizing during their time at the resort. It made some sense. Though she was still skeptical that her being the most approachable of the girls was the only reason why he tried getting near her at all. And she wanted to call him on it.

"And all you wanted to do was apologize, right?" she asked him point blank.

Ezekiel hesitated to answer immediately, figuring that whatever answer he would come up with would still result in her hitting him. "M-Mostly..." he managed to say. "... Okay, I think you're attractive... B-But I w'oodn't try to get... you know... that close with you, eh. ... I mean... you have a boyfriend... Why should I try to get close to you when you're really close with Geoff? I mean, you and Geoff were kissin' all the time. How do you guys manage to breath when you have your lips together for so long?"

The comment caused Bridgette to blush a little. She knew she and Geoff tended to get carried away with their make out sessions. They were just so lost in their love, they forgot that time kept moving around them.

"I see your point," she said, more so to get the subject back onto his apology. She cleared her throat, trying to cool her face down enough to stop blushing at the thought of her new favorite activity next to surfing. "So... you've been trying to apologize to me about what you said."

Ezekiel nodded, seemingly oblivious to how the previous direction of their conversation was causing her a slight bit of embarrassment. "I tried to talk to you whenever you weren't kissin' Geoff, and all," he said. "I wanted to wait until you were alone, but that didn't happen, eh. But now we're here... and you and I are here... so I'm sayin' soo'ry now..." He took a deep breath. And then he looked up at her with puppy dog eyes. "I'm so soo'ry for what I said... C-Could you... forgive me...?"

Bridgette sighed and then looked Ezekiel straight in the eyes. It didn't take her long for her to come to a decision. "I forgive you, Zeke," she said with a gentle smile.

"Y-You do...?" he squeaked, not sure if he heard correctly or if she was joking.

"Yes, Zeke," she replied, leaning over to rub his toque-covered head in a playful manner. "I forgive you for your comments from the first day of the show."

Ezekiel began to smile for the first time that morning.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - /_Sighs with relief._/ "I'm glad to finally 'ave one of the girls forgive me, eh. I know it won't be easy to get the others to do the same, but at least Bridgette accepted my apology. One is better than n'oon, right?"

Bridgette - "I can tell that he was being really honest and sincere with his apology. I cannot imagine being able to go through life the way he did and not feel emotionally torn up. Maybe there's a really kind soul underneath. He just needs help learning what is socially acceptable these days." /_Pauses for a minute and looks around._/ "Well, Chris said this room was fair game when it came to being decorated. Doesn't look like any one has tried anything yet. So, I might as well be the first." /_Leans forward to camera and places a dolphin sticker upon lens so dolphin is visible to audience._/ "There! The first decoration of the confession cam."

Chris - /_Examines dolphin sticker on lens._/ "Pretty strong adhesive she put on there... Heh-Ha! I can imagine a number of people who are not going to like that. The chaos in here when all is said and done will be so awesome!"

* * *

It wasn't long before Bridgette and Ezekiel would have company in the living space. What surprised them was that they were joined by none other than Gwen, Courtney, and Duncan, thereby bringing together the five students who would be responsible for decorating the living space. All three gave the same answer as to why they came down.

"Nothing better to do," Duncan said with a shrug when he was asked by Ezekiel.

As soon as Gwen and Courtney arrived, Bridgette felt obligated to see that they received, and accepted, Ezekiel's apology. Gwen accepted it without any problems, even saying that she didn't feel that insulted by his remark. Both Bridgette and Courtney seemed skeptical, to which Gwen replied that Heather was the embodiment of the statement. Courtney was a little hesitant at first at accept Ezekiel's apology. Then she noticed the look in his eyes and let out a sigh, giving in and saying that she forgave. She pointed out, though, that he shouldn't expect her to be friends with him right off the bat.

"I understand," Ezekiel responded. "I'm just glad to 'ave your forgiveness, eh."

"Just as long as you don't pick up any of Duncan's bad habits," Courtney quickly stated, waving her finger at the prairie boy. She then shot Duncan look, though what kind of look greatly confused Ezekiel. It was supposed to look stern, but it didn't quite seem like it from the sparkle that he saw.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Dolphin Sticker)**

Duncan - "Oh sure, we wouldn't want home school to start acting like me. Other wise, he'll try to steal princess away from me." /_Laughs at the ridicules thought. Stops upon seeing the sticker and rolls his eyes._/ "Ah, geez. Malibu and her dolphin obsession. You'd think she'd come up with something a little more impressive than a sticker. Like this." /_Pulls out spray paint can and sprays D+C inside a heart on the side wall._/ "Now that is an impressive decoration. And a good one, too."

* * *

"Well, since the five of us are here, might as well put together some ideas of how we're going to dress this place up," Gwen commented, looking around at the living space. "Though I've been appointed as project leader on this one, I'll make it fairly reasonable for you guys. Come up with whatever ideas you have of what you think will do the place some good and give them to me. When I have an idea of what to do using all ideas suggested, I'll call you guys over and we can edit and revise as we see fit before presenting our final decision. Chris said we have all the time we need and they're fronting all the money, so don't be afraid to suggest anything expensive. As a matter of fact, I insist it for the sake of taking money out of Chris' pockets."

Bridgette shrugged. "Sounds good to me," she said, noticing that Ezekiel nodded in agreement as well.

"Whatever," Duncan said.

"You will take our suggestions seriously, right?" Courtney asked, looking somewhat concerned.

"Of course I will, Courtney," Gwen replied. "Just because I liked my room to be simple doesn't mean I'm gonna force you guys to follow my every whim. We do this as a team, alright?"

Courtney let out a defeated sigh. "Well, alright," she said.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Graffiti)**

Courtney - "Am I a bit of a control-freak? Maybe. ... Okay, definitely. I'm so used to being in charge of things that I have a hard time letting others take lead on a team I'm on. Usually, I only let it slide in desperate situations like in the dodgeball game. It's not that I don't have faith in Gwen. It's just that I was so close at winning the challenge. Meaning I was that much closer to having authority in decorating the living space. I just have this natural urge to see that everything is being done accordingly and I tend to feel that I need to step in and take charge in order for it be so. ... But, I guess I can trust Gwen. /_Sighs heavily, looks to the side and sees Duncan's graffiti. She gasps, covers her mouth with one hand, and blushes. She then realizes she's still being recorded and looks to the camera. Is frozen for a moment before letting out a sigh and looking down._/ "Oh, Duncan... How is it you're able to make me feel this way about you...?"

* * *

Moments later, the five students were spread out about the living space. Each one mentally coming up with ideas of how to decorate the place when the main door opened. In walked Jessica, their R.A. Even though it was a Saturday and thus meaning no classes going on, she was still wearing her school uniform.

"Good morning, boys and girls," she announced. "I see you five are wasting no time wanting to spruce this place up."

"Not much else we could think of doing," Gwen responded with a shrug. "Either that or tour the campus a bit so we know which is where. Though I imagine we would be mobbed the second we step outside."

"Speaking of which," Duncan noted. "Given that there were other students in the amphitheater last night, what's to stop them from barging in here and drowning us in their idolizing?"

Jessica simply pointed upward. "Chef's security system stationed on the roof," she answered. "Chris and the producers managed to convince the school officials that it would be in their best interest for Chef to have a number of his people on the roof making sure none of the other students are trying to sneak in here without any sort of authorization. That's not to say students are banned outright from ever coming in here. You guys can let them in if you want to."

"Do we even want to know what they do on the roof to keep students from coming in here?" Bridgette asked, although she started to wish she didn't do so aloud.

"I think the best way to describe it would be to take the water gun he used in the hide and seek game you guys had on the show," Jessica replied. "Only increase and size and power of it by... oh, I'd say times five... Any way, Chef has about twenty of those mounted on the roof with another thirty on stand by."

"You'd be able to wipe out a riot with that," Duncan commented, his eyes wide open in disbelief.

"At least you'll have your privacy," Jessica assured them. "Now then, I think I'll leave it to you guys to explain that to the others should they ask. In the meantime, I'm going to go check on Beth and Izzy. Seems like Izzy is going to keep their room decorated as a jungle, so I want to make sure Beth's alright."

* * *

Beth had been awake for hours, up at the usual time back at home. Only this was the first time she had gotten up in the middle of a jungle and was therefore quite afraid of what to do. So much so that she had great trouble just reaching over to the drawer next to her bed and retrieve her glasses.

Once she had her glasses on, she was still taken aback by what surrounded her. Swallowing nervously, she began to slowly make her way to the door and exit as quickly as possible. That was, if she could find the door. And at the rate she was moving, it would surely take many hours to achieve this. She was having a hard enough time mustering the courage to leave the comfort of her bed in fear Izzy hid something dangerous to further enhance the realism of the jungle setting.

"H-Hello...?" she whimpered as she finally got her feet to touch the floor. "I-Izzy...?"

There were a few sounds she was able to make out in the environment about her. The first was the gentle and quiet sound of the miniature waterfall that was underneath the window. The sound of the water running out making a small free fall to the rocks and pebbles that waited on the floor. The second were the occasional squawks and calls of the two parrots to further enhance the realism of the jungle theme. Apparently, Izzy called them Macadamia and Hornbeam. Beth didn't know why.

Beth slowly looked around some more, hoping to find one of two things. The door or Izzy. The door so she could manage to get out of the room. Izzy so that she could help her find the door. She swallowed nervously again before taking a few steps in a direction she thought would lead to the door.

"Morning, Beth!" a voice screamed joyfully from behind her.

Beth was so startled that she screamed, literally leaped forward a few feet, and landed flat on her face. She turned around to see her giggle roommate hanging upside down from a vine. Izzy continued to hang there as if perfectly comfortable with letting blood rush to her head.

"Izzy!" Beth cried. "Don't scare me like that!"

"Sorry," Izzy giggled, loosely beginning to sway herself back and forth. "Don't you just love the peace and calm this jungle gives you? It's so cool. I could spend hours in here and feel right at home."

"Um..." Beth tried to begin, wondering what to say to the lively redhead. "... C-Could you help me find the door...? ... Please? ... I really need to use the bathroom."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "The rest of the day was all boring and stuff as the students were just hanging out in their rooms or toured the rest of Riker Hall. Delaying the inevitable of going outside and meeting wave after wave of screaming adoring fans. /_Laughs._/ Although, Geoff and Bridgette did have a rather lovely game of tonsil hockey going on in the amphitheater all day, but that's about as far as they went. No one else went into the confession cam. And you can see that there aren't any new decorations in here as a result! So lame! We're just gonna jump to the entrance exam, if you don't mind."

* * *

**(Week 1, Day 2 - Sunday)**

"Alright, maggots!" Chef Hatchet hollered in the megaphone from his golf cart. "You are all to stand aside and let these celebrities through so they can take their dumb entrance exams! You will have plenty of time the next two years to bury them in a sea of humanity, rip their clothes off, and touch them in ways that would make them extremely uncomfortable! Like poking them on the cheek! But until then, they are off-limits for the rest of the day! So move over before me and my troops make you move over!"

"He's actually allowed to say things like that?" Tyler asked aloud while waiting with the others in the living space.

"If it will prevent a mob-like scene, school officials are fine with it," Jessica replied. "Now then, we will all be making our way to building twenty-four. This is where your homeroom will be, as well as where you will be taking the entrance exam. It is here you will be meeting your homeroom professor, Mr. Black. Oh, and before I forget, I also would like to note that displays of public affection in classrooms are frowned upon by the professors. So you might want to maintain some form of control over your hormones during class hours."

Upon hearing this, Geoff and Bridgette shot their eyes wide open and then slowly removed themselves from their lip lock. They both sighed heavily and looked down at the floor below them. Appearing quite sad over the news they had just heard.

"Denied, lovebirds," Duncan taunted with laughter. It was cut short when he was suddenly nudged in the stomach by an elbow. He looked over to meet Courtney's stern face. "Ow. What was that for?"

"To remind you that it also applies to your flirting, Duncan," she replied with her arms crossed.

The punk simply shrugged. "Hey, if all goes according to plan for you, we're barely gonna see each other during class hours any way," he noted. He then leaned in really close to her with a raised brow, causing her to gasp in sudden shock and blush as well. "So how about we make the most of the time we have together."

"Looks like Chef sprayed the last of the students," Jessica announced at that very second, watching the events that were unfolding outside. She then turned back to the students, scanning each one to make sure they were all in their school uniforms. "Now will probably be a good time to get moving, I believe."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "Unlike how we chose Jessica to be the group's R.A., Mr. Black was specifically selected by the school to be the homeroom professor. He seemed strange and maybe even a little dull at first glance. But then we saw footage of his handy work, and I gotta say that it was very gracious of the school to pick him for us."

* * *

The students, sitting in whatever open seat they could find, stared at the man Jessica introduced as their homeroom professor. Mr. Black looked quite strange, even by their standards. He had a stone-cold expression on his face, wearing a suit and tie, sunglasses, and his hair combed straight back. They were even more creeped out when he spoke.

"Good afternoon, students," he began. "I am Mr. Black and I have been assigned to be your homeroom professor. You may simply call me Mr. Black. I expect each and every one of you to adhere to the rules and regulations of this school whenever you gather in this classroom. And I will not tolerate behavior that is of an unprofessional nature. If you have any questions to ask of me, I will be more than capable of answering them before or after times in which you are to take examinations. Much like the one you are about to take momentarily."

The expressions on the group's faces ranged from disbelief to confusion. None of them could figure what to make of this man speaking before them. And a couple even had a feeling that this was not going to be a pleasant two years if any of the other professors are discovered to be just like him.

"At this time, your Resident Assistant is passing out your examination packets," Mr. Black said, verbally narrating what Jessica is doing. He then took a quick look at his watch. "In exactly one minute and thirty-two seconds, you will begin to take your test. I need not remind you that cheating is completely unacceptable in my classroom and I will keeping an eye on all of you to ensure it is not the case. When one hour has expired, you will hand the examination packets over to me, regardless of whether or not you answered all the questions with them, and return to your dormitories."

From the instructions he had given, everyone looked up at the clock to see that they would begin to answer questions at precisely four o'clock. They watched as the second hand began to tick around in a clockwise direction. Before long, it reached the top of the clock, resulting in the minute hand moving over to zero.

"Begin," Mr. Black announced. Within seconds, the students flipped open their packets, placed the tip of their pencils to paper, and started on the school's entrance exam.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "That Mr. Black seemed kinda spooky to me, really. It's like he's being boring on purpose to hide some kind of explosive personality underneath. I can only imagine what he is really like. /_Pauses and looks around the room._/ "There's, like, a real lack of personality in this room, too. Only a dolphin sticker on the camera and this graffiti on the wall obviously made by Duncan. I just wish I had something in hand right now to really spruce this place up..."

Tyler - "I dunno, man. I don't like taking tests in general. I get really nervous because they hype it up so much about how getting a good score on a test will get you places. So now I have this mindset every time I take a test that if I fail I'm not gonna be able to do the things I wanna do. /_Sighs and looks up. He notices something suddenly and looks disgusted. Then confused._/ Dude... Who the hell puts gum on the ceiling?"

Justin - "Taking tests is just not my thing, okay? If it has nothing to do with showing off just how incredible hot you are, why should I bother? I came on the show so that it would help get my handsome face out there so that the world would not just how ugly they were when compared to the beauty that I am. No test is going to tell me that I won't be a model. Especially when I already have a modeling contract. So what's the point of taking one ever again?"

Lindsay - /_Notices the gum up on the ceiling. Looking disgusted, she tries to move away from being underneath it._/ "Ewww! That is, like, so gross! I should really start putting things in here so that it would distract me from seeing that up there."

Eva - /_Stares at the poster of a horse on the wall opposite of Duncan's graffiti. She scoffs._/ "This room sucks. There's a crappy dolphin sticker on the camera, Duncan's stupid love tag four Courtney, a dumb poster of some horsey, and then someone had the audacity to put gum on the ceiling. Don't these people know how to decorate any more?"

Katie and Sadie - Katie - /_Looks behind and gasps in shock._/ "Oh my gosh! Sadie, don't look behind you!"  
Sadie - "Like, why not?"  
Katie - "There's this really creepy poster of Corey Clark back there."  
Sadie - /_Gasps in horror._/ "No way!"  
Katie - "Totally!"  
Sadie - "Who in there right minds would like that guy?"  
Katie - "I know, right?"

* * *

The twenty-two students sat in the amphitheater, mostly spread out about the main floor seats. The couples were generally together, locked in either a gentle embrace or, in the case of Bridgette and Geoff, a passionate make out session. Duncan wanted to be recognized in the latter, but Courtney would prefer that he keep his lips to himself at the moment. Though it didn't stop her from blushing madly and cuddling up after he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Before long, their R.A. arrived upon the stage and made her way to the podium. In addition to the clipboard in hand, she was carrying a stack of papers and a small pouch. Once she had everything organized, she tapped the microphone once to ensure that it was on and then spoke.

"Well, my underlings, your exams have been graded," Jessica announced. "If I call your name, it means you passed and will be studying with the rest of the student body. Come on up so I can give you your revised class schedule and a pin you are to wear to signify that your exam score qualified you to be an official student at Richmore. Boys, I recommend wearing the pin on your ties. Girls, have it somewhere visible on your ruffle scarf."

"What kind of pins are those?" Duncan asked both out of curiosity and just plain annoyance.

"It's of the school insignia," Jessica answered. "As you can see, I'm wearing one myself." She pointed out the pin on her ruffle scarf so that the students could see it briefly. "Now then, let me finish my announcements so you guys can prepare for your first day tomorrow. Eight of you passed the exam, incredibly with four boys and four girls. I will call you up in order of your scores from just barely passing to absolutely worthy, alright?"

After seeing the collective nods from the students before her, the R.A. sifted through the paperwork and poured the pins out of the pouch. She picked up a pin and a piece of paper before turning back to the microphone.

"It's not my thing, but I'm gonna have to do the whole cheesy announcing thing they do here at school," she stated before clearing her throat. "Any way... Richmore Academy would like to officially welcome first to its student body...

"Ezekiel."

The prairie boy shot his eyes wide open in sudden shock upon hearing his name called out. He managed to glance about and see that the others were just as surprised as he was, if not more so. He sheepishly got to his feet and walked nervously up to the stage, receiving the paper with his revised schedule and the pin he was to wear on his pin.

"You managed to make it, Zeke," Jessica said to him. "Your parents apparently did a good job educating you in that respect."

"Th-Thanks... eh..." he managed to utter before quickly returning to his seat. Upon sitting down, he immediately curled up into a ball and pulled his toque down over his eyes in shyness.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Gum on the Ceiling, a Horse Poster, and a Corey Clark Poster)**

Bridgette - "I'm starting to feel really sorry for Zeke. His first day on the show he totally embarrasses himself with sexist comments and now he's so afraid that he'll make another bad mistake. On top of that, he's going to get thrown to the sharks simply because he's smart enough to be an actual student here." /_Sighs._/ "I hope whoever joins him will watch over him. He's going to need all the help he can get."

Ezekiel - /_Looking upward and praying._/ "Please, oh please, oh please, let me live thr'oo this. I'm too young to die, eh."

* * *

"Next," the R.A. continued. "Richmore Academy would also like to officially welcome...

"Beth."

"Really?" Beth gasped. "My score was high enough? Oh, yay!" She clapped her hands together in excitement before rushing to the stage to collect her schedule and pin. "Oh thank you, thank you!"

"Good job, kid," Jessica said with a smile. "Have a cookie on me." Seemingly out of nowhere, she produced a peanut butter cookie and gave it to Beth. The farm girl more than willingly took it as she made her way back to her seat.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - "Oh my gosh! I can't believe I'm smart enough to actually be a student here! This is so great! I can't wait to tell my parents back home! They'll be so excited! And the best part, I don't have to deal with Heather!"

Heather - /_Filing her nails and scoffing._/ "So pig girl is smart. Doesn't make her any less pathetic. Besides, now I won't have to suffer through her annoying snorts everyday."

* * *

"Moving along," Jessica announced. "Richmore Academy would like to officially welcome...

"Cody."

"Alright," Cody said in his smoothest voice. Beth giggled shyly when she thought he was clicking his tongue and pointing his fingers at her. The techno-geek strutted his way to the stage, doing his best to phase out the chuckles aimed directly at him.

"Might wanna consider walking normally when going to class," the R.A. noted after handing him his schedule and pin. "Most of the professors here are not big fans of movement that isn't casual."

"Oh, okay," Cody nodded before returning to his seat. He continued strutting, to which Jessica just smirked and shook her head.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Cody - "Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I'm gonna be a true Richmore Academy student!" /_Air-guitars and does guitar sounds._/ "This is going to be great! Now I get to be a stand-out amongst the others from the show!"

Beth - /_Giggles and snorts._/ "Cody looks cute when he's excited."

Eva - /_Grunts._/ "Cody looks stupid when he's excited."

* * *

"And the fun continues," Jessica stated. "The next student Richmore Academy would like to officially welcome is...

"Gwen."

A number of students were quite surprised to hear her name called and immediately turned their attention toward her. Gwen just raised a brow for a moment and then shrugged. She got up, walked onto the stage, and took her schedule and pin.

"Must be surprised to be up here, huh," the R.A. commented.

"Not really," Gwen responded. "I just never really cared that much about how smart I might be." After giving Jessica a nod, she returned to her seat. Upon sitting down, she gladly allowed Trent to wrap an arm around her shoulders.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "I may not care about how smart I am, but I do pay attention to the grades that are important. If I want to go to a good art college, I need the scores that will get me in. Doesn't matter that I'll have listed on my transcript that I attended Richmore Academy. The right grades from the right classes are what's necessary for me to move forward with my art education."

Trent - "A lot of guys were surprised that Gwen passed the entrance exam. Hello! You people spent eight weeks in Musoka with her. Did you not know she was smart? I certainly knew. I knew as soon as I met her. She even helps me with my homework every once in a while during our weekends together. And my grades are good when I study by myself."

* * *

"Let's continue, shall we?" Jessica asked. "The next student to be officially welcomed by Richmore Academy will be...

"Harold."

"Yes!" Harold exhaled, pumping his fist. He heads up to the stage, giving LeShawna a smile and wave along the way. LeShawna looked as though she was chuckling, but both knew she appreciated his affections.

"Nice work," Jessica commented as she handed him his schedule and pin.

Harold nodded and proceeded to make his way back to his seat. As he walked, he managed to catch a glance of Courtney. He saw that she looked none to happy about having to even comprehend his presence. He hung his head slightly and sighed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "I'm still mad at Harold for getting me eliminated from the show. I want to strangle his scrawny little neck until his eyes pop out. And I've already beaten him up with a lamp post! That back-stabbing traitor has yet to feel my wrath!" /_Takes a deep breath and calms down._/ "Easy, Courtney. You're not going to let your anger get the best of you." /_Takes another deep breath then looks straight in the camera._/ "I'm not going to plot some petty revenge just because I have a grudge. Not while I'll be busy running for student office. Besides... Duncan will just doing the beatings for me. Why get my hands dirty when I have my own personal troublemaker do the work? So long as I get a few licks of my own when no one's looking."

Duncan - "Oh, you can bet your bottom dollar I haven't forgiven Harold for getting Courtney eliminated from the show. I'm just waiting for the opportunities to open up so I won't get caught doing what I've got planned for him. And if he tries to cross her again, I'll ramp the pain up a notch. No one messes with my princess and gets away unscathed!"

* * *

"Still more names to announce, boys and girls," the R.A. noted. "Richmore Academy would like to officially welcome...

"Courtney."

In a sudden shift in mood, Courtney started getting anxious at hearing who would be announced next. When her name was called, she exhaled in excitement and rather unconsciously pulled Duncan into a tight embrace before heading up the stage.

"There was no need to act nervous," Jessica said, handing the student her schedule and pin. "You were a lock to pass."

"Doesn't make it any less suspenseful," Courtney responded with a smile before making her way back to her seat. Jessica rolled her eyes and shook her head in amusement.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - /_Sighs heavily._/ "I'm having trouble figuring the best way to apologize to Courtney about what I did on the show. Not to mention she's still probably angry at move over it even after she pounded me with a lamp post. It wasn't until after the fact that I realized I badly miscalculated just how severe of a backlash would result from my actions. I did it because I wanted to get back at Duncan for bullying me just for the fun of it. But now he's going to attack because I took my revenge out on Courtney. And with her coming after me too, I find myself painted in a corner I can't get out of."

LeShawna - "I've had people come up to me and ask why I be dating that string bean. He may be some kind of freaky, but he treats a lady just right. That boy is fa-ah-ine! So you know I will not appreciate people messing with him. Pick on Harold and you gots to deal with me. I'm gonna have his back if he's faced with odds he can't handle himself. Any one has a problem with that can kiss my apple luscious--!"

* * *

"Two more, folks," the R.A. announced. "The next student Richmore Academy would like to officially welcome is...

"Noah."

Noah's immediate reaction was far different than everyone expected. He raised a rather curious brow. A short moment later, he got up and confidently made his way onto the stage.

"Almost got a perfect there, smarty pants," Jessica joked before handing him his schedule and pin.

"The story of my life," Noah retorted. To his surprise, she formed a smirk on her lips as if to say that she got his sarcastic humor. He made his way back to his seat feeling content.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "I think Noah's going to feel right at home in this school. Virtually three-quarters of the student body are as cynical as he is and they relish in each other's brand of humor. Sarcasm at it's finest can be found here."

Noah - "There was no doubt I was going to pass the exam. I'm fine with not getting a perfect. But the fact that I wasn't called last meant that there was someone smarter than me. And I take great pride in being the smart one in the group."

* * *

"And last, but most certainly not least, the student who passed the exam with a perfect score." the R.A. spoke said. "The Headmaster himself wants me to provide this letter expressing his sincerest congratulations to the student. Richmore Academy would like to warmly welcome officially...

...

...

...

"Izzy."

To say the other twenty-one students were flabbergasted would be an understatement. Owen would moments later start to cheer happily for his crazy girlfriend, but everyone else seemed more horrified than anything. Izzy just giggled and began skipping her way to the stage.

"Just remember to wear your uniform during class hours, m'kay?" Jessica reminded the redhead as she handed her the schedule, the pin, and the congratulatory letter.

"Oki-doki!" Izzy answered cheerfully. She then turned to take a good look at everyone else, who were staring at her with wide eyes and dropped jaws. With a free pinky, she gently pulled down one of her bottom eye lids and blew a raspberry at them. Satisfied, she skipped off stage and back into her seat.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - /_In shock._/ "... Does this mean she actually has an IQ of 188?"

Noah - "Crazy girl is smarter than me? It's official, hell has frozen over."

Owen - "That's my girl! Izzy's the smartest of us all!"

Izzy - "I wonder if they managed to notice that I used my own blood that I pricked from my right forefinger to mark my answers. I bet they would be so impressed."

* * *

"So, those are the eight students going on to study with the rest of the student body here," Jessica spoke as she began to close her announcements. "The rest of you will be studying under a separate schedule from them. You can pick up a copy of the schedule sheet on your way out of the amphitheater. And my I recommend, if you haven't already done so, picking up gym wear at the tailor shop. Otherwise, I'll see you all later."

Jessica stepped back from the podium and walked out of view through the backstage area of the stage. The students got up and one by one exited the amphitheater. Bridgette decided to hang back from going straight to her room and see if she could talk to one of those going off to study with the student body about her concerns for Ezekiel's possible safety. In her luck, the four girls who passed the exam were somewhat grouped together.

"Hey, guys?" the surfer called out to them. "Can I ask you something real quick?"

Gwen looked to the other three before they all shrugged. "Sure," the goth girl answered. "What's on your mind, Bridge?"

Bridgette opened her mouth, then quickly closed it. She bit her bottom lip, tapped her fingers together, and looked to one side before finally saying something. "It's just that..." she tried to begin to say, failing miserably. "Could you... I mean... Would it be okay... if you guys... you know... keep an eye on Zeke...?"

"What do you mean?" Beth asked curiously.

Bridgette took a deep breath. "I'm just... really worried," she replied. "I'm worried about what might happen to him starting tomorrow, you know. He's been home schooled all his life and now he's suddenly being thrust into attending an actual school with little to no preparation. Not to mention there will probably be a lot of girls out there who are still upset by the comments me made back on Camp Wawanakwa that we all know he deeply regrets. I wish I could be there to help him myself, but I obviously can't. So... could you guys watch over him for me?"

Courtney looked rather hesitant to even consider agreeing to help. Bridgette was her friend and roommate, though. And she did accept Ezekiel's apology yesterday. She was just still uncomfortable about being around him. Gwen appeared as though she didn't seem to mind too much. Watching just how nervous the prairie boy was to even rejoin the group upon their arrival at the school, she felt he had more than learned his lesson. Beth didn't seem to mind either. In fact, she looked rather happy that she would be able to be around someone she was familiar with at the start of class.

And then there was Izzy.

"Don't worry, Bridgette!" the wild girl proclaimed, proudly thumping her chest with a fist. "Zeke will be in goods hands! Izzy will protect him from any mean, crazy girls that come after him! I still got that tranquilizer gun that I used to shoot Heather with when I thought she was a deer--"

"I'm sure weapons will be unnecessary, Izzy," Gwen interrupted. "I think just having you alone watching his back will be enough." The goth girl then turned to Bridgette. "But I'll be sure the help out, Bridge."

"Same here," Beth said enthusiastically.

Courtney looked nervously at the others, who were all looking to her to see if she would join them or not. After a moment of silence, she rubbed her arm and gave out a sigh. "Okay," she relented. "I suppose I can find sometime to make sure he doesn't get himself into trouble. It's just that I need to get started on campaigning for student council."

"Geez, we haven't even attended a class yet and you're already working on getting elected?" Gwen commented, rolling her eyes a bit. "The students here barely even know you, except from what they've seen on the show."

"And that's the thing," Courtney stated, getting into her politician mode. "I'm coming in with national television exposure that I need to capitalize on. I need to build upon whatever fame I have and keep it going so that they know who to vote for."

"Whatever," Gwen sighed, not wanting to hear any more of it.

* * *

Here is a recap of who passed the entrance exam:

Ezekiel

Beth

Cody

Gwen

Harold

Courtney

Noah

Izzy

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Gum on the Ceiling, Horse Poster, Corey Clark Poster

* * *

I already had six of the eight names in mind before I even started on this story, but the ideas thrown about in the reviews helped me decide upon including the other two. And it may actually have been good because it opens up for some more story possibilities down the line. I haven't gone crazy yet with how the decorations in the confession cam will turn out. I actually think I hit a brain-fart on the idea, almost causing it to fall apart right away before coming up with something. I'm open to suggestions, so go ahead and throw some out there in the reviews.

As for why Gwen would take a mini-fridge over a laptop, I'll explain in the next chapter.

---

**Next Up:** First day of school.


	4. Week 1, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Four

---

**(Week 1, Day 3 - Monday)**

There was knocking on the door every ten seconds. And it got progressively louder. LeShawna growled as she unwillingly opened her eyes in frustration and looked at the clock. She groaned before sitting up and rubbing her eyes. To say that she was not happy would clearly be an understatement. It was too bad for Katie that she was her roommate.

"It's five thirty in the morning!" LeShawna yelled. "Do I need to remind you that I am not a farmer?"

"It would certainly be in your best interest to wake up now, LeShawna," came a muffled reply from the other side of the door. It sounded very much like Courtney. "The second we step outside onto the campus, we're fair game for any group of fans to surround us. So we're going to leave as early as possible so that the delay in reaching homeroom won't cause us to be late."

"And when the hell are we supposed to be at homeroom?" LeShawna asked. She quickly understood Courtney's reasoning for waking her up so early. She still wasn't happy about it, but it was better than regretting to get up now than later.

"Eight o'clock," Courtney replied.

LeShawna groaned again. "Yer frontin' me..." she muttered. She gave out a heavy sigh and rubbed her eyes once more. "We'll be ready by six!" She managed to let out a yawn before rolling out of bed. "Yo, Katie. You get all that?"

"Yeah..." a very sleepy moan emerged from the other bed. "I don't wanna go to school today..."

"I hate to play the mama here, but you need to get up," LeShawna said, slowly walking over and gently pushing Katie on the shoulder. "C'mon, girl. We've gotten away with not dealing with them fans long enough. Time to face the music."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "Back home, my girl Jasmine was trying to pass me off as big of a celebrity as Beyonce. It was crazy. Especially when she tried to charge people for my autograph and a picture with me. That's not my thing, yo. If people want their picture with me or an autograph, that's fine with me. I ain't gonna charge 'em for either." /_Glances behind her at the Corey Clark poster and shutters._/ "And who the hell put that crap up in here? I better do something before the rest of the girls lose their minds."

Eva - /_Stares at the Denzel Washington poster covering the Corey Clark poster then shrugs._/ "Looks like someone beat me to the punch. If I ever find out who put up that stupid Corey Clark poster right after I was in here, they're dead."

* * *

Gwen arrived in the living space, fully dressed in her school uniform and wearing her trademark black boots. She was sipping from a cup of the cream soda Trent brought her from the party Friday night. Since she hadn't left Riker Hall, it was the only drink she had in her mini-fridge. She generally didn't drink soda in the morning, but she made an exception for having to wake up this early.

"Hey, Gwen," Beth yawned as she arrived in the living space herself. Gwen nodded back in return before taking another sip of her drink. Beth blinked for a minute as she noticed to cup in Gwen's hand, suddenly remembering that she won the challenge on Friday. "If you don't mind me asking. Why did you pick the mini-fridge of the laptop? I mean, wouldn't the laptop be more useful than a mini-fridge since you could do your school work on it?"

Gwen shrugged. "Already have a laptop," she replied. "Was a gift from my uncle for making the finals of the show. I can only imagine what I'd have gotten if I actually won. So why get something I already have? So it was either the mini-fridge or the bike. And unlike Trent, I don't generally ride motorcycles."

"Oh, okay," Beth said. "That makes sense."

Moments later, the rest of the students arrived in the living space one by one. The last to appear was Owen, having once again done a poor job of putting his school uniform on. And like before, Izzy literally jumped onto her big oaf of a boyfriend with a giggle and straightened everything out. Owen chuckled at how ticklish he felt during the whole thing. Once he was completely set, he picked up his girlfriend and kissed her on the cheek. Izzy giggled with satisfaction before being placed on her feet.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Denzel Washington Poster over a Corey Clark Poster)**

Noah - "The sight of Owen and Izzy in one of their romantic moments is the stuff nightmares are made of." /_Shudders._/

* * *

"Well, looks like Jessica is not going to be with us on this one, guys," Trent sighed, looking outside of Riker Hall. "We have two hours to get from here to Mr. Black's classroom. Hope everyone's ready."

"We woke up two hours early just to get to a building that took us twenty minutes yesterday to get to?" Heather questioned in frustration. "There's nobody out there. Why the hell was I woken up for this?"

"No one was trying to wake you up, prissy," LeShawna retorted.

"Just because we don't see them right now doesn't mean they're not out there," Harold noted. "I bet they're just waiting until the exact second that we step outside before they come rushing after us like stealth ninjas in the night."

"That's the lamest analogy I have ever heard in my life!" Heather yelled.

"Hate to admit it, but I think lanky four-eyes is right," Eva said.

"I would appreciate you not calling my man names, you feel me?" LeShawna said sternly, getting straight into the face of the fitness buff with no fear in her eyes. Harold practically swooned upon seeing his girlfriend stand up for him.

"I was giving him a compliment, sister thunder thighs," Eva growled back.

"Oh, tell me the macho mama with tighter butt-cheeks than my weave didn't just call me that again!" LeShawna hollered in anger.

"Guys, knock it off!" Bridgette announced. Everyone went silent and drew their attention to her. She seemed a little hesitant to continue, but managed to take a deep breath and press on. "It's going to be hard enough to get to Mr. Black's classroom with what we're about to face out there. We don't need any more problems by fighting amongst ourselves."

"She's right, y'all!" Geoff spoke in support of his girlfriend. "It's gonna be so not cool if we're late. And I like to pride of making sure everyone makes it to a party on time. So let's do this now so we can all have a good time, alright?"

Most were pretty sure that comparing going to school to going to a party did not fit one bit, but seemed to have gotten the point of his statement. Not to mention they figured he even said anything at all because Bridgette did so and he was more than willing to back her up. A point proven by the two immediately engaging in another passionate game of tonsil hockey.

"Well, you heard them," Gwen said with a shrug. "Let's get this over with."

Everyone grumbled before managing to make their way toward the door. Only three people didn't move immediately. The first two were Bridgette and Geoff, still locked in their kiss. The third was Ezekiel. He nervously looked out at the door everyone headed toward and was shaking.

As if noticing this, Bridgette opened her eyes and spotted him standing there. She managed to remove herself from kissing Geoff and turn her full attention to the prairie boy. Geoff was confused at first that he wasn't kissing his girlfriend suddenly, but then noticed the concern she had for Ezekiel and followed along.

"Easy there, Zeke," Bridgette said, placing a comforting hand on Ezekiel's shoulder. "Take deep breaths."

"I-I'm so scared, eh..." Ezekiel muttered. "I've never been to a s'kool before. And the girls here might hate me for what I said."

Since first apologizing to Bridgette, Ezekiel managed to apologize to as much of the other girls as willing to hear him out. Most were generally through some help from Bridgette. Gwen and Courtney accepted his apology Saturday morning while Beth and Lindsay do so on Saturday afternoon. LeShawna, Katie, and Sadie accepted on Sunday morning.

Izzy was a little different when he tried to apologize to her before they all took the entrance exam. She explained that she actually wasn't offended by his remarks. Rather she thought it was cool that he said that in the face of danger, thereby earned her respect and thus no need for apology. Ezekiel didn't know what to make of this.

This obviously meant neither Eva nor Heather have been approached. Ezekiel was still too scared to even approach the fitness buff. As for the queen bee, he was told by the others that she would probably deny him right off the bat without hesitation. He was a little sad because he wanted to at least try.

"Don't worry, Zeke," Bridgette said. "I'll be right beside you, okay?"

"Dude, we'll watch over you," Geoff added. He caught the sight of his girlfriend looking up at him with an appreciative smile on her face. "It'll be like having another brother."

Ezekiel began to relax a little as he heard this. "Thanks, eh," he said.

"Bodyguard Izzy reporting for Zeke Protection Duty!" Izzy chanted from behind the prairie boy. Her sudden appearance caused Ezekiel to squeak in shock, looking over to see if he was about to be attacked. "I'll protect Zeke here with my very life!"

"Don't really need to go that far, Izzy," Bridgette said, somewhat disturbed by the overwhelming enthusiasm the wild girl was displaying. "But we're glad you're here to help."

All twenty-two gathered before the door. Many took a deep breath before opening the door and stepping outside. They were barely five yards away from Riker Hall when the inevitable happened. Within ten seconds, they were surrounded by a sea of humanity as far as the eye could see. Barely any of the twenty-two could move any further and the majority of them were actually quite scared that they might not make it out of here alive. That was before the screaming began to sound.

"Cody!" squealed a great number of girls in unison. The techno-geek perked up upon hearing his name. And the fact that he was being adored by so many girls, a number of them rather quite attractive, caused him to suddenly blush.

"Izzy!" chanted a number of guys, not quite in unison. Izzy immediately leaped onto the shoulders of her hefty boyfriend. Her clear appearance caused the guys to cheer and pump their fists in the air. The crazy girl began to cackle at managing to have her own fan club gathered before her.

"You guys are, like, so the cutest couple ever!" a female student swooned as she managed to get up close to Duncan and Courtney. The statement caused Courtney to blush while Duncan grinned with pride. "My friends and I have watched your first kiss fifty times!"

"Fifty?" Courtney gasped, the shade of her blush beginning to deepen. "Oh... Oh dear..."

"I bet we can do fifty right here, right now," Duncan snickered, pulling Courtney closer into him. The sight caused the female student who speaking to them to nearly faint on the spot.

"Every guy in our dorm has a poster of you hanging on their wall," a male student confessed to Lindsay, his tongue sticking out and drooling at being so close to her.

"Aww, that's nice of you guys," Lindsay said, oblivious to the way she was being stared at. "I've always wanted to be really popular and now I'm, like, really famous. Isn't this exciting, Byron?"

"Yeah..." Tyler replied, though in a rather hesitant tone that she didn't pick up. "Exciting, Linds..." While he was happy when she threw herself onto him for a hug, he was clearly uncomfortable with the number of male students looking at his girlfriend the way they were. So he made sure to keep his arms locked around her waist. Fortunately for him, she held him right back.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Tyler - /_Sighs._/ "I guess I forgot that I'm not the only guy who knows that Lindsay's really sexy and hot. Back on the show, there were just a few of us and not many were eying her the way I did. Now that we're in a more public place... I just hope she still thinks of me over other guys."

Lindsay - "Oh my gosh! Like, this one girl had the nerve to come up to Traylor and said that she wondered what it would be like to date him. Right in front of me! Could you believe that? I wanted to so slug her right then and there."

Chris - "As you can see, our twenty-two students had quite the tough time making their way over to Mr. Black's classroom. Since this is a half-hour show, let's just cut to one of the good scenes that happened once they managed to escape the mob."

* * *

Bridgette and Geoff were locked in each other's arms. Afraid that had they even loosen their embrace, one would slip away and get lost in the crowd. They managed to make it through all of the bodies that had surrounded them and slip into building twenty-four. Feeling as though they had been running the whole time, they took a moment to catch their breath. Geoff looked up at the clock and smiled upon seeing what time it was.

"We made it, babe!" he cheered. "And with half-an-hour to spare!" He tightened his embrace while Bridgette let out a small cheer of her own, more out of being able to get through the mob with her boyfriend.

"Plenty of time for us to celebrate before we go in there," she noted with a grin on her face. However, her expression changed when she suddenly remembered something and gasped. "Oh my gosh! Zeke!" She began looking around frantically while still remaining in her boyfriend's arms. Not being able to catch a glimpse of the prairie boy, she became really worried and started to whimper. "Oh no! We lost Zeke!"

"Hey, guys!" Izzy joyfully called as she hopped up to them. She paused for a moment, taking a good look at the couple before her when she started to giggle. "Wow. That's quite a hiding spot you have for him. I should do that sometime."

"Huh?" Bridgette uttered in confusion. She looked over to her boyfriend, both raising a curious brow. Then they looked straight down and saw right away what Izzy was referring to.

In trying to latch on to one another, they accidentally managed to sandwich Ezekiel in-between them. They held onto each other so tight that it made it impossible for the prairie boy to any sort of room to move. Bridgette immediately panicked, leaping out of Geoff's arms and away from the Ezekiel. Geoff took a couple steps back and, with Izzy, they took a good look at him.

Ezekiel stood perfectly still. His eyes had been shot wide open, his mouth closed. But more importantly, his entire face was red. Bridgette gasped, believing that her and Geoff's embrace had caused the prairie boy to lose oxygen.

"Zeke!" Bridgette cried, rushing over and gently shaking his shoulders.. "Zeke, are you alright?"

Then something happened. Something she wasn't quite expecting. Blood started to leak out of Ezekiel's nose. Upon seeing this, Bridgette started to blush. Even Geoff nervously chuckled and scratched the back of his head. Because when Ezekiel was sandwiched in-between them, he apparently had his face buried in her boobs.

"Zeke likes boobs!" Izzy declared, throwing her arms up as if in victory.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - /_Blushing, wide eyed, shaking, and whimpering._/ "... I... I... I... f-felt her... b-boobs... An'... An'... An'... th-they were... s-soft... eh..." /_Blood trickles down from his nose._/

Bridgette - "On one hand, I should be annoyed with Zeke because of the fact that he seemed excited for... literally burying his face against my boobs. He did admit to me that he found me attractive, after all. But at the same time... I shouldn't be too annoyed. I mean, in our effort to keep him close to us we ended up squishing him into a human sandwich. So it's not like he ended up feeling me on purpose or anything. Does that make sense?"

Geoff - "Zeke dude, I think know how you feel, bra. The first time I had my face buried in her boobs, when she accidentally knocked me over during a beach party I was throwing, it was so wonderful!" /_Swoons._/ "Bridge is such an amazing babe. She has the best boobs ever!"

Chris - "Now that's one way cop a feel." /_Laughs._/ "As much fun as it would be to see the students hang out with Mr. Black, I think you guys are more interested in seeing them in actual classes. So let's take a look at the smarty pants and see how they do with their first class."

* * *

**(The Smarty Pants)**

The eight students made their way to the back of the room, doing what they could to avoid the wandering eyes of the other students. Particularly those who quickly began to chit chat with one another about how the group now going to be classmates with them. While they unconsciously took their seats with the girls together on one side and the boys together on the other, Ezekiel sat as close to the girls as possible. He nervously began twirling his fingers together and tried to slouch down so that he would not be seen.

"Relax, Zeke," Gwen said to the prairie boy. "You draw more attention to yourself if you show off just how nervous you are."

"Oh..." Zeke whimpered. "Okay." He adjusted himself into a comfortable seated position on the chair and tried his best not to shake as much as he had been.

"It would be best for you to remain quiet and observe how the class is taught," Courtney noted. "Don't speak unless spoken to and be polite with your responses."

"If the professor does call out to you with a question, just give a simple answer," Cody added. "No need to explain your answers in detail unless he asks you to. Got it?" Ezekiel nodded.

The bell rang and the rest of the students in the classroom took their seats. Moments later, a middle-aged man walked in and immediately sat behind the desk before the class. "G'morning, everyone," he spoke. "Before we begin, I would like to first of all welcome our newest students to the class. I'm sure you will all fit in right at home with us. Okay then, today we are going to have some last minute comments about Ernest Hemingway before moving on. What did everyone think of 'The Sun Also Rises'?"

A female student immediately shot her hand up and the professor nodded at her to speak. "I loved it," she swooned. She propped her head up with one hand and smiled with a longing look in her eyes. "He's so romantic."

"Romantic?" Gwen scoffed with a raised brow. "Hemingway?" She looked at the poor girl as if wondering if she was kidding. "He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who squandered half of his life hanging around Picasso trying to nail his leftovers."

"Gwen!" Courtney hissed. She, like most everyone else, was quite shocked to hear this out loud in a classroom. What surprised her more, though, was that the professor appeared rather humored by the statement.

"Interesting description of the man," he said. "The inclusion of Picasso made it more unique. I generally liked the label of a misguided idealist who allowed the sorrow of heartbreak consume his sense of reason. That was from an old college buddy who greatly disliked American authors for the most part and preferred the works of the British. In particular, William Shakespeare. And with that bad segue, I'm afraid, is the introduction of your next assignment. Who here is familiar with Sonnet 141?"

For a few moments, no one raised their hands. The professor waited patiently to see if someone would be willing to budge. Finally, a hand shaking with nervousness slowly rose up. It belonged to Ezekiel.

"Ah, Ezekiel, I believe your name is," the professor stated. "Would you care to recite it for us?"

Ezekiel swallowed. "I... I only remember four lines, eh," he said. His eyes darted around, noticing how everyone was now looking at him. This was a whole new experience for him. Being educated along with so many other people he knew nothing about.

"That's fair enough," the professor said with a nod.

"O-Okay..." Ezekiel muttered. He tapped his forefingers together for a quick second before he spoke again. "'In faith, I do not l'oov thee with mine eyes, For they in thee a th'oosand errors n'oot, But 'tis my heart that l'oovs what they despise, Who in despite of view is pleas'd to d'oot.' That's all I remember, eh."

"That's very good, Ezekiel," the professor commented. "Now, as many of you know, people often times need to translate Shakespeare's words in order to understand the meaning behind them and their relation to the overall telling of whatever story it is written in. His sonnets are no different. Your assignment is to create your own version of Sonnet 141. To write it in a way that it would be easily understandable while still retaining the message." He paused upon noticing a hand shooting up. "Yes?"

"Do you want it in iambic pentameter?" Izzy asked casually.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "I could've raised my hand and recited the entire sonnet. But I wanted to see what my fellow students were like. Once I get a better idea of who they were and how they reacted to others, then I know how to best present myself. Why else do you think I barely spoke those first couple of days on the show? I just didn't take into consideration how much they didn't appreciate smart people like myself. Maybe I should have been like Izzy and created an opposite persona so as to fool everyone. I just wouldn't take it as far as she does."

Harold - "Maybe Izzy is smarter than she lets on. I wonder why she acts so crazy, then. Is it like an escape from what she might perceive as boring normality? That would sure be a strange way to do so, though."

Courtney - "It just baffles me the way Izzy is. Clearly, she's a really smart girl. Smart enough to be a great politician one day. So why is it that she's this whirlwind of craziness that is completely the opposite of what she should be otherwise capable of? What would drive her to be what she is?"

Ezekiel - "One time at Playa Des Losers, Izzy tried to take my toque while I was relaxing in the hot t'oob. She said it had cuteness powers and that she wanted to harness it. ... What does she mean by that ab'oot my toque, eh?"

Izzy - "Isn't Zeke cute? It must be that toque of his. Whenever he plays around with it, it makes him ten times cuter than before. He even looks cute when he's nervous. But it's such a downer that he's nervous a lot. He deserves a hug! In fact, he deserves more than one hug! And everyone knows that being hugged by a girl makes everything alright for a guy. I overheard Geoff say that once." /_Throws arms up in the air as if in victory._/ "I hereby pledge to have Zeke hugged by a girl at least three times a day! Even if I have to do the hugging myself!"

Chris - "Seems the smarty pants are fitting in alright. Let's take a look at the others and see how they're holding up."

* * *

**(The Others)**

"In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the... Anyone? Anyone?" the economics professor spoke in a slow and dull tone. He was met with no immediate answer. So he continued to speak roughly a second later. "The Great Depression. Passed the... Anyone? Anyone?"

This was the first time virtually everyone in the group was learning about economics in the United States. And it appeared to them that it was boring as hell. It wasn't the kind of boring that had them groaning and squirming every ten seconds. It was the kind of boring that made them wonder if they were still in the middle of the Awake-athon.

Duncan had decided to lean back in his chair and throw his legs up onto the desk in an effort to be relaxed. Barely a minute into the class, he was wondering if he'll end up putting too much weight on the chair to result in him falling over when he falls asleep. Fortunately, the back of his chair was held in place by DJ. Rather, his head as he fell forward to asleep and managed to get his head position on the back of Duncan's chair.

"The Tariff Bill?" the professor continued, seemingly oblivious to the sheer boredom he was inflicting upon the students. "The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act. Which, anyone? Raised or lowered?"

Heather was trying to stay awake, but for a completely different reason. Every so often, she would send angry scowls in LeShawna's direction. LeShawna would return the scowls with equal hatred and silently hinted that she was going to cut the queen bee's hair of the second she fell asleep.

"Raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government," the professor stated. "Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects?"

Justin looked like he was wide awake. Sitting upright and apparently his eyes were looking forward. But the other students knew he just painted his eye lids to look like he was completely alert. Trent sighed, his head propped on one hand to try to stay awake. With the fingers on his other hand, he silently tapped them on the desk as though he were playing a musical instrument.

"It did not work and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression," the professor answered to his own question. "Today, there is a similar debate over this. Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before?"

Eva let out a quiet sigh, her head propped up by a hand to stay awake. She looked over to see Owen fast asleep, his upper body arched back on the chair. What concerned her was whether or not he was going to rip one anytime soon in the middle of class. If it was anything like the venture at the department store, it wasn't going to be pretty.

"The Laffer Curve," the professor said. "Anyone know what this says? It says that at this point on the revenue curve, you will get exactly the same amount of revenue as at this point." There was a low screeching noise as the professor wrote on the chalkboard illustrating what his point.

The sound was enough to wake up Geoff, who was face down on his desk and drooling in his sleep. He looked over to notice the small little puddle that had formed on his desk and sighed. Seconds later, he had fallen back asleep. Bridgette, who had not once noticed the condition her boyfriend was in, had propped her head up with one hand in an effort to pay attention. But she was losing the battle to stay awake.

"This is very controversial," the professor noted. "Does anyone know what Vice President Bush called this in 1980? Anyone?"

Katie and Sadie, who obviously sat next to each other, had leaned upon one another as they fell asleep. Tyler and Lindsay, their arms crossed on their respective desks and propping their head upon them, managed to silently flirt with one another through eye brow wiggling and puckering of their lips. But even those were not preventing them from being sleepy.

"Something-d-o-o economics," the professor hinted. "'Voodoo' economics."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "So in exchange for getting out of juvie and being with Courtney, I have to go through two years of that?" /_Sighs heavily._/ "I should have known this wasn't going to be all fun and games..."

Lindsay - /_Confused._/ "I don't get it. What did he mean when he said 'curve'? Like, did someone's body have really bad curves, or something? And he mentioned voodoo. Did someone have bad curves because someone else put a curse on them?"

Tyler - /_Swooning._/ "Lindsay's curves..."

DJ - /_Rubbing his head._/ "Aw, man. That class was so boring, I got this big headache going on here because of it. Third time it's ever happened before. I wonder why it is?"

* * *

In exchange for a few autographs and a couple of pictures, all twenty-two students managed to find their way to the school cafeteria for lunch. And given that they hadn't eaten all day, they were absolutely starving. Upon arrival, they found Jessica sitting alone at a table. In one hand, she held a book she was reading. In another was a tiny straw she was using to stir her hot tea. They were barely a yard away from her when she looked over and smiled.

"Ah, they you guys are," their R.A. said. "I hope you guys didn't suffer too much from the teaching process."

"Least I managed to make up the nap time I lost waking up early," LeShawna muttered, followed by a yawn.

"Why don't you guys go ahead and grab some food," Jessica said. "There's two lines to choose from. One is for the special made dishes from the school chefs. In that line, it's what they make or bust. The second line is the buffet. Choose whatever your heart desires. Though I should warn you of who cooks in the buffet."

That statement alone was more than enough for the twenty-two students to gag. Fortunately, they had the choice of not having to eat any meal made by Chef Hatchet. They would have to eat whatever the school chefs decide to make, but they knew it would taste so much better than the alternative.

Once everyone each had a plate of the country fried steak with mashed potatoes, they gathered together at the same table Jessica was sitting in as well as a few that surrounded. The couples obviously sat together. Ezekiel found himself sitting in-between Bridgette, who immediately resumed the game of tonsil hockey with Geoff, and Izzy, who just giggled for seemingly no apparent reason. Though he didn't know why, Owen chuckled along with his crazy girlfriend.

"I take it you guys had a fun time in your class, huh," Duncan spoke, the statement being directed to the eight who got to study with the student body.

"I'm still amazed Gwen didn't get in trouble for saying what she said aloud," Courtney responded.

Gwen merely formed a smirk. "Our professor agreed with my statement about Hemingway, that was the best part," she said. "Most would groan and moan whenever I had anything to say at all."

"Zeke got to speak in class!" Izzy practically announced. She then swooped over and glomped the prairie boy from behind. Then she lifted him high in the air while gently maintaining her hug and slowly rocked him from side to side, not seeing that he went wide eyed and formed shades of pink on his cheeks. "Clever little Zeke recited Shakespeare!"

"It was only the first four lines from Sonnet 141," Noah noted in his ever familiar cynical tone. "But it was impressive nonetheless that he managed not to faint in class."

"That's not nice, Noah," Courtney said to the know-it-all. Noah just ignored her, to which Courtney scoffed and turned her nose up. She then glanced over to see that Izzy was still hugging Ezekiel. "Um... Izzy, why are you still hugging him?"

"It's part of my pledge!" she answered.

"Pledge?" Trent asked.

"Uh-huh!" Izzy nodded. "Zeke is so nervous all the time and I decided the best way to cheer him up would be to have him hugged by a girl at least three times a day!"

"Wh-Wha...?" Ezekiel squeaked, the blush on his cheeks getting redder.

"So you think that him getting hugged by girls three times a day will boost his self-esteem?" Gwen asked in summary.

"If nothing else, he'll get more comfortable around girls," Trent theorized with a shrug.

"Not if he keeps getting hugged by Izzy all the time," Duncan noted with a chuckle.

"Can I hug too?" Owen asked his crazy girlfriend. "I know it's not part of the pledge, but I wanna hug him too."

"Sure!" Izzy answered. Before she could let go, Owen immediately wrapped his giant arms around her and Ezekiel. He lifted them up in his huge hug, to which Izzy cackled with joy. "Wheeeee! Isn't this great, Zeke?"

"Help..." Ezekiel begged quietly to the others in a whimper.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Owen - "I love Izzy. That was a great idea of her to get Ezekiel hugged three times a day by a girl. Hugs make everyone feel better. I know because I feel better when I'm being hugged. And Izzy probably knows it too and therefore wants to get Ezekiel hugged so that he feels better. Izzy is so smart. That's why I love her."

Izzy - "Okay, so Zeke has been hugged twice today. I hugged him at lunch and Bridgette held him close to her boobs earlier for protection. I bet boobs make a great hiding place. Guess that makes Lindsay's an excellent spot to hide in. Maybe next time we all encounter a mob of students, we can hide Zeke in Lindsay's boobs."

Justin - /_Places headshot of himself upon the horse poster, on top of the horse's head._/ "There. That's better." /_Points to the picture of himself and winks._/

Cody - /_Raises a brow at Justin headshot over the horse poster._/ "Man, some of these decorations are really strange. Like this picture of Justin right on top of the horse poster. Or that Denzel Washington poster behind me that's over another poster I can't make out. We need something cool in here. And I know just the thing."

Courtney - /_Staring at latest objects, one on each side of Duncan's graffiti._/ "What is wrong with you, Cody? Are you that much of a geek that you need painted portraits of people from Star Trek in here? That's just really sad and pathetic!"

Harold - "Wicked! These are awesome renditions of James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard in their respective uniforms. It does present a hard question, though. Do I like Kirk or do I like Picard? Hmmm..."

* * *

**(The Smarty Pants)**

"No!" Noah cried in a useless vein to get away. He was being dragged by the collar and made no physical effort to release himself from the peril he was about to face. "I'm not doing this! I can't believe you, of all people, are forcing me too!"

"I don't care how much you suck at sports, Noah!" Beth yelled back at him. "I don't care how much you think the game is stupid! You are going in there and you are going to play dodgeball! That is final!"

"Oh my," Courtney gasped in shock as she watched Beth drag Noah into active playing zone. "I never knew she had it in her to be so hostile. It's almost scary."

"Being tormented by Heather will do that to you," Gwen noted. "Remember when Lindsay just unloaded with profanity that likes of which the world never heard before?"

Beth practically slammed Noah in place with Cody, Harold, and Ezekiel. After she marched off, a whistle blew to signify that a team was in place. Noah looked painfully upset at the rather sudden change in events.

"There's no use trying to fight it any further," Harold said. "If Beth hadn't dragged you in here, the coach probably would have himself. And I don't think he's someone you want to mess with, really."

"Calm down, Zeke," Cody said to the shaking prairie boy. "The balls are all not that hard, okay. Just as long as it doesn't hit you below the belt. Heh... But don't worry, alright? It's just a relatively harmless game in the spirit of fun."

The whistle blew again as the boys looked over and found themselves facing four girls. Just not the four girls from their group. Rather four girls who looked ready to massacre them.

"Oh dear," Cody said, swallowing hard. "This doesn't look all that good." He quickly realized that he said that loud enough for the already scared Ezekiel to hear. "Hey, at least the balls aren't too hard--"

The whistle blew for a third time. Barely a second later, Cody was smashed in the face by an in coming ball. The techno-geek was literally knocked off his feet before dropping hard onto the floor. Ezekiel yelped and immediately crouched down, covering his head with his arms. Harold had no trouble dodging any of the balls that came flying at him. Not wanting to take part in the game any further, Noah scrambled as dove directly behind Ezekiel for cover.

"Noah, you insensitive coward!" Beth cried out from the sidelines. "How dare you use Ezekiel as a shield!"

"Izzy will pound you Izzy-self, Noah!" Izzy screamed in great anger. "Izzy will not stand by and let Noah make Zeke take the damage for Noah just because Noah's scared of getting hit!"

"Excuse me for living!" Noah yelled back.

"Now Noah's stealing Owen's lines!" Izzy raged. "Izzy really mad!"

"Stop speaking in third person, psycho!" Noah screamed.

"Watch out!" Harold cried.

Noah barely managed to catch sight of the ball. As he watched, all sense of logic apparently went flying out the window as the ball curved around Harold and came directly toward him.

"How the hell--" was all he managed to utter before the ball slammed into his face. Noah went flying a few feet before skidding his way toward the girls in his group. He came to a stop right in front of Izzy.

"That's what Noah gets for trying to get Zeke hurt!" the redhead said sternly before blowing a raspberry at the fallen know-it-all.

"It's just too bad for Ezekiel that Harold can't throw the ball worth a damn," Courtney noted. "Harold is just going to be dodging all day and the prairie boy is gonna eventually get hit by a ball."

"Poor Zeke," Beth sighed.

"Especially when you take into consideration the strategy of those girls," Gwen commented.

"What do you mean?" Beth asked.

"If you noticed, they're all throwing at Harold only," Gwen said. She left the others to figure out the rest of the statement for themselves. It didn't take long for them to realize what she was saying.

"They're picking them off one by one so that only Ezekiel would be left," Courtney gasped.

"They want Ezekiel all alone for them to pound away at," Beth added with worry. "Harold! You gotta catch the balls!"

"I can't catch and dodge at the same time!" Harold yelled back. "It's getting harder to dodge four balls at one time as it is!"

As soon as he said those words, everything came crashing down. He managed to spot one of the balls curving and successfully dodged it. But he didn't catch a second ball curving and found himself getting his square in the stomach. There was enough force to knock him off his feet and cause him to crash back first on the floor.

Ezekiel was left all alone against four heavily armed girls. And they looked ready to destroy the poor little prairie boy.

"Oh my gosh, he's going to die," Beth gasped.

"Let me at 'em!" Izzy cried while being held back by Gwen and Courtney. "Let me at 'em! I'll rip 'em apart! I'll tear them from limb to limb! I'll make 'em wish they never targeted Zeke!"

Ezekiel opened his eyes and looked around, finding himself all alone in the active zone. He stood up and shook even more as he found himself facing four girls who in a few moments' time would unleash hell upon him. And there was nothing he could do to stop them. In a weak, pathetic attempt to protect himself for the incoming fury, he slowly raised his arms up to cover his face.

"I'm gonna die n'oo, eh," Ezekiel whimpered. "I'm gonna free'king die n'oo."

He closed his eyes, said a silent prayer, and awaited the inevitable. To come.

...

He waited some more.

...

...

He waited.

...

...

...

And waited.

...

...

...

...

...

"Doesn't he look so cute?" an unfamiliar female voice squealed.

"Aww, he's adorable like that," another female voice added.

Ezekiel dared to open one eye and look over. He noticed something that completely baffled him. The four girls were now giggling and cooing at him as though he was a newborn baby. He remained in place, not sure if this was some trick by the girls or by his eyes. One of the girls then made the softest, most gentlest underhanded toss of the ball and it lightly bounced off his toque covered head. The whistle blew a second later, calling to the end of the game.

Gwen, Courtney, and Beth were absolutely stunned. Izzy was still growling, though was making little attempt to fight out of the hold Gwen and Courtney had on her. Cody, Noah, and Harold each raised curious brows. The four girls systematically took out the boys one by one until only Ezekiel was left. And in the end turned into giggling fangirl duplications of Katie and Sadie.

"Wow," Cody managed to utter in amazement. "That didn't turn out quite as bad." He got up and walked over to Ezekiel, noticing that the prairie boy still hadn't moved a muscle. "Um, Zeke? Game's over. We can go to the sidelines now. ... Zeke?"

Ezekiel shook once. Let out a whimpering sigh and then collapsed onto the floor. Symptoms of fainting. The four girls who had been his opponents giggled at the apparent cuteness of Ezekiel fainting.

"Oh dear," Cody said.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Justin Headshot over a Horse Poster and Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard)**

Ezekiel - /_Sniffles and sobs._/ "I don't get girls, eh. First they wanna hurt me. N'oo they wanna hug me. Isn't there an easier way to kn'oo how to understand girls?"

Chris - "Not really."

Izzy - "Those girls were meanies teasing Zeke that way! You tease him by making him blush, not by wanting to hurt him only to swerve! They don't deserve to hug him!"

Gwen - "It's going to be a long time before Zeke is comfortable around girls. Those girls in gym made sure of that. No matter how many hugs he gets, he's going to continue to be nervous around them."

* * *

Five students occupied the living space at the moment. In the two chairs were Trent, quietly strumming at his guitar, and LeShawna. Duncan sat at one end of the couch, trying as much as he could to have his own personal space with what little room he had. For taking most of the couch from the other end were Bridgette and Geoff, focused heavily in their make out session.

"These two ever get tired of sucking face?" Duncan grumbled as he rolled his eyes.

"Dude, we all know you'd be wanting to do the same thing with Courtney if you had the chance," LeShawna retorted.

"What we do is flirting," Duncan sternly noted. "The kissing is a bonus. What they're doing requires a whole new definition of hormones. A completely different sport from tonsil hockey."

"If kissing makes them happy, I'd say let them kiss," Trent commented, still strumming at his guitar.

"Bet it makes you wanna lock lips with Gwen right about now, huh?" Duncan teased with a smirk.

Trent showed no sign of embarrassment. Rather he just smiled lightly. "Having to drive two hours and back every weekend teaches you patience," he said. "Plus, we prefer our time together to be as private as can be helped."

LeShawna let out a sigh. "I'm just hoping Harold and I can get our relationship moving along," she said. "Neither of us were as willing as you and Gwen to make the venture to be with one another after the show, having to settle on phone calls and e-mails."

"Still don't see the attract between you and four-eyes," Duncan muttered. This ended up being the wrong thing to say as he found himself being pulled at the collar by LeShawna. And she was not in a laughing mood.

"I will have no problem getting one of them strikes from the school if it means putting you down for continuing to treat my man with disrespect," she seethed. "And I know you and Courtney plan on going after him as many times as you both feel like out of revenge for his getting her kicked off. Just remember that I got his back. So if you have a problem with Harold, you got a problem with me. You feel me?"

Duncan returned the death glare he was receiving from her before he took a deep breath. "Yeah, I hear you," he said. It took a minute before she finally released her grip on his collar.

"Guys, take it easy here," Trent said. He had stopped strumming at his guitar during the short exchange, but went back to playing in the hopes of changing to mood. "Let's just all relax while we wait for the others to return."

"I'm wondering why the lovebirds here are waiting with us," Duncan said, jerking his thumb at the kissing couple on the couch. "The three of us have significant others we're waiting for. But what about them?"

"They wanna know how Zeke fared on his first day in a school," Trent replied.

"Just like I would like to know how you all fared in my role as R.A.," a new voice spoke. The three students who were the most alert looked up to see Jessica enter through the front door carrying a number of large plastic bags. Behind her was Owen, carrying a number of tables. "Figured the best way to do that would be to treat the lot of you to a Chinese buffet. One from a place I know that's not far from the school."

"Whoa, you could feed Owen four times over with all that food," Trent commented, looking at bags Jessica held. He managed to see Owen, who was beginning to set the tables, nod in agreement.

"I figured you guys wouldn't be the only ones wanting seconds," their R.A. said with a smirk.

Quite suddenly, a flash of orange and green appeared before it nestled upon the jolly oaf's shoulders. "Mmmm, Izzy loves Orange Chicken," the crazy girl mused then giggled. "Izzy also loves Mu Shu Pork, Salt and Pepper Squid, and Teriyaki Steak."

"Owen loves them too," the big guy happily added. He set the table he had in hand down and then lifted Izzy over into a hug. "As much as Owen loves Izzy." He kissed her on the cheek while she cackles with glee.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "I try not to think about Owen and Izzy as a couple as much as possible, alright? Because I seriously do not want to imagine what their kids will be like and the chaos they would reign down upon the world."

Noah - "Owen and Izzy reproducing?" /_Shudders._/

* * *

The others from the group began filing into the building. Gwen walked over behind her seated music man and wrapped her arms around her. Harold squatted next to his seated girlfriend and smiled with her as they held hands. Courtney found herself grabbed at the wrist by the juvenile delinquent and pulled down so that she found herself sitting on his lap. She blushed in embarrassment when he gave her a grin that made her heart do flips. Beth, Cody, and Noah made their way up to their rooms to get changed.

Entering last was Ezekiel, who appeared quiet down and depressed. As if sensing this, Bridgette and Geoff removed themselves from their lip lock, which resulted in a rather wet sounding pop to be heard, and took a good look at the prairie boy. They immediately felt greatly concerned.

"Oh, Zeke," Bridgette said as she immediately rushed over to him and placing both her hands on his shoulders. "What happened?"

"Meanie girls teased him poorly in dodgeball!" Izzy replied while still in Owen's embrace. "Taking out the others so that it would leave him, scaring him to death, and then just play like nothing bad happened. I get revenge on them for you, Zeke!"

"Aww, dude," Geoff said, standing beside both Ezekiel and Bridgette. "That must have been major harsh, man. Especially on the first day too, bra. You didn't deserve that."

"No, you didn't deserve any of it at all," Bridgette added. She then pulled Ezekiel into a hug, causing the prairie boy to go wide eyed. "At least you're amongst friends now."

"Totally," Geoff said, wrapping his arms around the embracing bodies of his girlfriend and Ezekiel. "We're right here for ya, little dude. We got your back."

"Woo hoo, pledge quota for the day has been met!" Izzy cheered. "Izzy wants in on group hug!" She managed to slip very easily out of Owen's hands and then skipped over to the three hugging bodies. She wrapped her arms as much around them as she could and then somehow lifted them up with ease.

"Group hug!" Owen cheered, wanting in as well. He wrapped his arms around everyone, though he decided not to lift them all up. He settled for keeping their feet to the ground.

Ezekiel was wide eyed for a moment longer. Then he managed to look around. Being hugged rather affectionately by Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, and Owen. He noticed Gwen and Trent smiling from where they were. The same with Harold and LeShawna. Over at the couch, Duncan had a grin on his face while Courtney seemed to wave with a little reluctance.

Seeing that all these people cared about him resulted in a smile forming on his lips.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - "I signed up for the sh'oo so that I could meet people my age, eh. Maybe even make a f'oo friends along the way. After said th'oose thin's I said on the first day, I thought for sure I made a big mistake. Coming here was a hard thin' to do since I went thr'oo all that. My parents were worried too. But now I think I'm glad I signed up, eh. Because n'oo I got friends. Friends like Bridgette an' Geoff, Izzy an' Owen. Even Gwen an' Trent, Harold, Cody, an' Beth. Duncan might even be warmin' up to me since were roommates." /_Pauses for a moment, then digs into his coat pocket and pulls out his Z necklace._/ "Back at Playa Des Losers, I tried to be somethin' I wasn't. Actin' like I was all m'oodern an' all. This necklace is a part of that, eh. With the friends I have, I can be me. Not somethin' else, eh. So I don't need this any more. But I guess I could keep it ar'oond somewhere as a reminder." /_Looks around, trying to find a place to put it. He scratches his head and then looks up. He examines the gum on the ceiling for a moment then looks at the necklace._/

Chris - /_Studies the necklace hanging from the gum then looks at the gum._/ "I don't wanna know what that gum is made of..."

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard

* * *

Thanks for the reviews guys. I need them like Zeke needs a hug. Just I would prefer more than three reviews a chapter. Also like some of the comments and suggestions you guys are throwing in. They'll help me in figuring out how to get the confession cam looking like an absolute mess. One thing I'd like to note is that in naming the parrots I was looking to name them after nuts. A pair of nuts for a nut. Macadamia seemed easy enough. Apparently there's a Hornbeam nut, and I liked the name so I used it for the other bird. Don't expect to see too many ventures in classes because I just ended up using two of my favorites movie references, **10 Things I Hate About You** and **Ferris Bueller's Day Off**.

---

**Next Up:** Friday Gross-athon


	5. Week 1, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Five

---

**(Week 1, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

A number of screams were heard in the cafeteria during lunchtime. Everyone looked over to see four girls panic and screech as they were surrounded by a flurry of bees. Second later, they ran out crying about getting stung.

"Weren't they the girls from gym yesterday?" Beth asked Gwen. The goth girl simply nodded in response.

No one saw the grin on Izzy's face as she hummed quietly to herself.

* * *

**(Week 1, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

Bridgette was on her way to her room when she saw Ezekiel sitting right outside the door to his room. The prairie boy was twirling his thumbs and staring at the ceiling above.

"Deep in thought there, Zeke?" she asked him.

"Not really, eh," he replied. "Just tryin' to kill time."

"Oh?" the surfer girl inquired. "How come you're not killing time in your room?"

"Duncan wanted me out of the room for a f'oo hours," Ezekiel answered.

"What?" Bridgette cried in shock. She couldn't believe how heartless the punk could be. "Why would he do that?"

"Because he didn't want me to b'oother him and Courtney, eh," Ezekiel replied in a rather as a matter of fact tone.

An answer the surfer girl wasn't quite expecting to hear this early.

Bridgette said nothing further. Instead, a shade of pink started to appear on her cheeks. Nervously, she nodded in understanding the response and in clumsy fashion made her way back into the room. At least she didn't have to come up with an excuse for Courtney to step out of the room for a while so she could spend time with Geoff.

* * *

**(Week 1, Day 6 - Thursday)**

"Attention students of Richmore Academy," Jessica announced in a megaphone. She was outside Riker Hall, but was facing the students who were passing by. "With the blessing of school officials, we are selling tickets for you all to attend tomorrow's challenge live in the Riker Hall Amphitheater. First five seats will be sold at $20 each, every other seat will be at $10. The challenge will take place tomorrow evening at 6pm on the dot. Oh, and may I recommend to those sitting in the first five rows to bring a canopy when you arrive."

* * *

**(Week 1, Day 7 - Friday)**

"It's Friday night, and it's Challenge Night here on Total Drama Academy!" Chris announced from the middle of the stage. A loud cheer came from the crowd seated in the amphitheater. The twenty-two students seated on stage looked quite nervous having to have their next challenge was going to be watched by an audience.

"For our viewers are home, this week's challenge will see the students compete in front of a live crowd here at the Riker Hall amphitheater," Chris explained to the nearest camera. "This week will also see the return of a popular challenge indeed. But first, we need to get things set proper. Gwen!"

A spotlight appeared suddenly upon the goth girl. Gwen raised a curious brow while the audience began to cheer. After catching Trent placing a comforting hand on her shoulder for a brief second, she got up from her set and walked up to the center of the stage where the handsome host awaited.

"Congratulations once again on winning last week's challenge," Chris said to her. "For that, you will not be joining your fellow students in participating this week. However, you will still play an active role in the challenge. And you do lose out on winning this week's grand prize, I'm afraid."

"Fine by me," Gwen said with a smile.

"That leaves us with twenty-one students participating," Chris said, clapping his hands together. "Unfortunately, that's one too many for what we've got planned for this week. So we need to pull someone out. For that, Gwen will decide by taking a spin of... The Random Loser Generator!"

From one side, Chef Hatchet pushes onto the stage a giant wheel with twenty-one faces and an arrow. The audience verbalized their awe of the device while the participating students merely raised their brows in interest. Gwen shrugged and rubbed her hands together before spinning the wheel clockwise. After several seconds of spinning, the wheel slowed down until it came to a complete stop. The arrow was pointing at the face of Ezekiel.

"And Ezekiel has been chosen!" Chris announced.

Ezekiel blinked in surprise while the audience began to cheer again. He looked over at Bridgette and Geoff, both giving his smiles of assurance, before he got up and joined Gwen at the center of the stage. The goth girl gave the prairie boy a grin before ruffling his toque-covered head in a friendly manner.

"Zeke my man, like Gwen you will not be participating in the challenge," Chris explained. "But you will still have a role to play. And you also miss out on the grand prize."

"Don't think of it in the sense of losing the prize," Gwen whispered to Ezekiel. "Think of it as winning a chance to not suffer through whatever it is they're having the others do." The prairie boy thought about her words and then nodded in agreement.

"Okay, is everybody ready for this week's challenge?" Chris asked everyone in the amphitheater. There was a loud approving cheer that nearly rocked the stage. "Alright, let's get this party started! First, we need to divide the twenty participants into four teams of five. I think it's fairly obviously who Team One will consist of. Last week's losers! DJ, Eva, Heather, Justin, and Owen, assemble at the far left side of the stage."

There was a scattered mix of cheers and boos from the crowd as the five named students made their away to their assigned place. Most of the cheers apparently directed at Heather as she found herself on the receiving end of a few verbal insults. She scoffed and threw her nose up in response.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "Whatever. Those people were just jealous of me. They'd sell their parents for five minutes in my shoes."

DJ - "Heather said she was a popular girl before she came on the show. Since then... Well, she hasn't been real popular here at Richmore. Considering this school is generally full of people she looks down upon, it's quite understandable."

* * *

"The other three teams were chosen by the group's lovely Resident Assistant, Jessica," Chris continued. "Team Two will be an all girls team. Will the following assemble at the left side of the center stage? Beth, Katie, LeShawna, Lindsay, and Sadie."

Any cheers from the crowed were immediately drowned out by a much louder sound. The BFFFLs began squealing with delight that they would be together in the competition. Lindsay and Beth joined in as they would be together as well. Soon, all four girls were hopping together in pure joy. LeShawna looked like this was more of a burden than anything.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - /_Sighs_./ "The one thing going for them girls is the fact at least none of them are Heather."

* * *

"Okay, I think we all got enough of that," Chris said, rubbing the inside of his ear with a finger after the noise died down. "Any way, assembling at the right side of the center stage will be Team Three. Naturally, this team will consist of all guys. Cody, Duncan, Harold, Trent, and Tyler."

Within the cheering crowd came a large amount of screaming from girls. All directed at Cody. The techno-geek blushed and gave out a small wave, still quite unprepared for having such an adoring fan base. Especially one consisting primarily of girls. Duncan glanced over at Harold and rolled his eyes, in disbelief that he had to partner with the four-eyed geek.

"I have no shame in admitting that I'm a little jealous of you, Codemister," Chris commented with a chuckle before turning back to the audience. "Which means at the far right end of the stage will be Team Four. Bridgette, Courtney, Geoff, Izzy, and Noah."

Chants of Izzy's name were yelled out, though not in unison, by a large number of males in the audience amist the cheering. Izzy cackled and waved at her fan club with a large grin on her face.

"Alright, babe!" Geoff cheered. He immediately scooped Bridgette into arms and began to passionately kiss her. She made no attempt at resisting and kissed him back, resulting in every female in the audience to swoon and squeal at the romantic sight.

"Guys!" Courtney said to her teammates. "You can do that after we win. Right now, we have to focus."

"Awww," Izzy pouted. "I wanted to play the harp right now." She revealed in hand a harp from behind her back.

"Where the hell did you get that?" Noah asked in bewilderment.

"I found it to the side of the stage," Izzy gleefully replied. She began to gently strum the musical instrument and giggle. "I'm gonna be the angel of love in our group and Owen can be Cupid. That would be cool!"

"That would be disturbing..." Noah uttered.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Dressed as an angel, is singing to the camera and playing the harp._/ "Looo-vin' yooou is more than just a dream come true... Do-do-do-do-dooo..."  
Owen - /_Dressed as Cupid, belches musical note._/

* * *

"Alright students, get into your assigned groups and your assigned positions," Chris said, clapping his hands together again. "Because the real fun is about to begin."

"Fun for Chris," Gwen muttered quietly so that only Ezekiel could hear.

"Ladies and gentlemen, students of all ages," Chris announced to the audience. "Tonight, we're bringing back an all-time favorite challenge and you get to witness it live before your very eyes. It's time for the return of...

...

...

...

"Brunch of Disgustingness!"

The audience had burst into a loud cheer, though there were a number of girls who screamed in disgust of what was to come. The majority of the twenty on stage immediately turned white with fear. Owen and Izzy seemed quite excited. Gwen let out a sigh of relief and noticed Ezekiel was shaking.

"Makes you glad you're not participating, huh," she noted to the prairie boy. He simply replied with a nod.

"Well, I think we got this one in the bag," Heather said to her teammates rather proudly. "Owen here will definitely eat anything you put in front of him, so all we have to do is stomach through our dishes and we'll win." The others seem to nod in agreement.

"I can't do this again," Bridgette began to whine. "I'm going to have to eat meat. And they'll probably try to force me to eat those poor dolphins for sure this time."

"Ready to get tied down, music man?" Duncan teased Trent, who simply replied by swallowing nervously.

"Here's the score," Chris began to explain. "The rules are based around the popular team motto of 'All for One and One for All'. The teams will be competing in elimination rounds. We will feed you guys the most vile and barf-inducing food known to man. Any one student who either refuses to eat a dish outright or pukes at any time is out. But they're not the only ones out, oh no! Using the 'All for One and One for All' mentality, if you get eliminated your entire team gets eliminated too."

"So much for us getting the easy win," Justin muttered, glaring at Heather. The queen bee looked quite unhappy with how the challenge would be played this time around.

"We've gotten some complaints from PETA regarding the last time we did this challenge," the handsome host added. "So we've agreed to not include any meat by products to Bridgette's team so long as she is still competing." The surfer girl and her team let out somewhat relieved sighs. "And we do understand a number of your have allergies, so we've made sure they're out too." Harold and Noah let out their own sighs of relief. "Once they're out though, that's when things are gonna be awesome!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Well, this sucks. I have to work with Harold. And I can't pull something to intentionally make him puke unless I want the other three look down my neck for having them eliminated as well."

Justin - "Doesn't Chris know that, as a contracted model, I have to abide by a very strict diet of water, baby food, and whatever is served in the cafeteria? I'll gain ten pounds from just one bite of whatever it is they're going to make me eat."

Beth - "Oh man! This is going to be so sick. At least I got my braces out now so I won't get anything stuck in my mouth."

Courtney - "We might be able to pull this off. Having Bridgette means we won't eat meat. Noah being allergic will surely reduce the number of other disgusting ingredients. And then there's Izzy who... Let's just say she's game for anything."

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Still dressed as an angel, still singing to the camera, and still playing the the harp._/ "Tater tots, Cold Duck on ice, And we can clip coupons all night, And baby you can have whatever you like."  
Owen - /_Still dressed as Cupid, singing off key._/ "You like."  
Izzy - "I said you can have whatever you like."  
Owen - "You like."  
Izzy - "Yeah."  
Owen - "Yeah."

* * *

"Now that the audience have protective covers to shield them from any and all gross projectiles, as well as quite a number of buckets and trash cans for the stomach pumping about to take place, it's time for Brunch of Disgustingness to begin!" Chris announced. A loud cheer from the audience followed before four tables slid out onto the stage in front of the teams.

"Round One," the handsome host continued. "Teams will one at a time eat a specific dish. Should all members of the team each successfully finish their dishes, they'll get a new dish to chow down on. They will all keep going until someone is eliminated. So let's bring out the first dish... Fried Salad!"

Three plates slid out from the side of the stage and stopped upon the tables for Teams Two, Three, and Four. They looked like mountains of orange muck in a pond of crusty white substance. The audience began to gag and moan in disgust, though a few strangely did so in delight.

"This delicate treat uses freshly pulled grass specially fried for two hours so that they're nice and crispy," Chris explained. "They were then topped with a special sauce blend of mustard and horseradish. Sprinkle some dirt crystals, throw in a molded cheddar cheese ball, and drown it all in milk two months past the expiration date. Voila! Fried Salad as a healthy appetizer."

"Delicious!" Owen and Izzy mused in unison.

"Hey, wait a minute," Heather said after hard swallow to overtake her disgust. "Where's our plate?" Only Owen shared her apparent sentiment. The rest of her team wanted her to shut up.

"Bet you guys forgot, huh," Chris said with a rather maniacal chuckle. "Since you guys were the losers last week, you're competing this week with a disadvantage. You'll get the same dish as everyone else alright... But everything you eat in this challenge will be cooked by Chef Hatchet!"

A plate slid out and stopped at Table One. It looked much worse than what the others had. It was brown, more chunky, and it was still on fire. In addition to the gags and moans from the audience, a number of girls were screaming in terror. The very appearance of the dish was more than enough for Ezekiel to immediately a bucket and hurl in it.

"Ooo, that looks tasty," Owen said.

"I wanna try that too!" Izzy commented, hopping in place on the heels of her feet.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - "I have a weak stomach, eh. My mom makes it a point to eat food that's good for me. So when I first saw Chef's c'ookin' on the sh'oo, I puked. I'm surprised Chris didn't sh'oo that on TV, eh."

Chris - /_Looks none too happy._/ "That's because he barfed on me! I had to go get cleaned up, which is why I appeared after everyone took their seats."

* * *

"So everyone line up in the order of who on your team will be eating first," Chris added. "Remember that you must first finish the dish before you can switch out to the next member of your team."

It was more than apparent that Owen and Izzy would be starting for their respective teams. LeShawna reluctantly decided to go first given who her teammates were. Tyler surprised his team by volunteering to go first.

The order of Team One went Owen, Eva, Heather, DJ, and Justin. Justin tried to find a clause in his modeling contract that would get him out of eating, but was disappointed that there wasn't anything he could do. Team Two went LeShawna, Katie, Sadie, Lindsay, and Beth. LeShawna figured Beth was the most likely to chicken out before one of the others would eventually barfing. Team Three was Tyler, Duncan, Cody, Harold, and Trent. Trent was taking deep breaths, holding them to the count of nine, in order to psyche himself up. Team Four was Izzy, Geoff, Courtney, Noah, and Bridgette. Noah wanted to go last, but was immediately overruled by Geoff and Courtney's concern that Bridgette will get sick quicker.

"Everybody ready?" the handsome host announced. "And... Bon appetit!" There was a large cheer from the audience. Yet none of the contestants began to eat. In fact, they were looking at Chris with confused looks. "Uh... That means 'Go'."

Owen immediately dumped the entirety of his plate into his mouth, taking no heed to the fact that it was still on fire. Izzy had no trouble zipping through her plate in less than five seconds. Tyler tried to eat his plate as if it were a normal dish, doing his best to fight through the disgust he was feeling. LeShawna was clearly having trouble just taking bites of her dish, but do so any way. The audience voicing how sick and disgusted they were just watching, and yet enjoying every second of it.

With Owen and Izzy done, it was Eva and Geoff's turn at the plates. Eva used her bare hand to put out the fire before she began eating. She made no expression as to whether or not the food was disgusting. Geoff took his time picking at his food and then bits and pieces of it. The sight of her boyfriend not enjoying his dish was making Bridgette feel more uncomfortable than before. Tyler managed to finish his dish next, giving Duncan his turn at the food. LeShawna managed to finally finish her dish and reluctantly gave Katie a shot at the dish.

"Oh my gosh, this is, like, so gross!" Katie whined. Even Sadie began to cry, watching her BFFFL suffering before her. Yet, to the surprise of a number of people including LeShawna, Katie willingly took a bite. She started to whimper, but continued eating onward and was even moving through her dish rather quickly.

Eva and Duncan finished their dishes at the same time. Both Heather and Cody were extremely reluctant to even go near their dishes. Heather didn't even know how to put the fire out. As she was trying to figure this out, Katie shocked everyone even more by managing to finish her dish and not throw up. She instead started bawling over the apparent disgustingness of the food she had to eat. LeShawna patted her roommate on the back in comfort.

"If Katie can do it, then I can do it," Sadie said to herself nervously, trying whatever she could to psyche herself up. She came up to the dish and flinched.

Geoff managed to finish the dish and let out a cheer, likely in an effort to get his girlfriend to relax. A number of people in the audience cheered along with him. With her turn coming up, Courtney swallowed hard and nervously came up to the dish.

Then she heard the sound of two people losing their lunch while the audience screamed and moaned in agony.

"Oh, man!" Chris laughed in glorious satisfaction with a hint of disgust. "That was so awesome! A double blow of epic proportions, ladies and gentlemen! Too bad we're left with a burning question to answer. Who purged first? Heather or Sadie?"

"That was vile!" Heather screamed. She was on her knees, holding her short hair back, and couching out the remnants of her lunch. Her teammates looked none too happy that she potentially got them all eliminated.

"It was so gross!" Sadie cried on her knees. Katie wrapped her arms around her BFFFL and cried along with her. Lindsay and Beth joined in on the sympathy, while LeShawna sighed and shook her head. She wasn't ready to be sympathetic until she knew for sure they were eliminated. Rather, she was willing to be proud of Sadie if it turned out Heather was the first to barf.

"Looks like this is a wee bit too close to call by the naked eye," Chris announced. "We're just gonna have to watch this on super slow-motion replay!"

A big screen monitor appeared above the stage for all to see. It began to show both Heather and Sadie, their movements at the exact second in time. Moving extremely slow so as to see just who was the definitive loser. The speed in which the footage was being shown caused a number of people in the audience to feel quite sick. Then came an image that showed a conclusive result. By roughly one-hundredth of a second.

"Talk about too close for comfort!" the handsome host announced, still laughing with delight. "But in the end, you can all clearly see that the first to blow chunks... was Sadie!"

The audience exhaled their reactions vocally. Some where in disbelief, others were just grossed out by having to watch hurling being committed in slow motion. With the exception of LeShawna, the all girls team burst into wails and moans at losing. LeShawna just muttered a curse that Heather got lucky. Heather and her teammates were relieved that they didn't lose and therefore wouldn't have to suffer through another disadvantage for the second week in a row.

"Since we are adopting the 'All for One and One for All' mentality, Sadie's loss has resulted in the elimination of every member of Team Three," Chris explained. "But in keeping with that same mentality, it is because that she was the sole loser that Sadie will therefore be the only one going into next week's challenge with a handicap."

The BFFFLs cried even more upon hearing this sudden news. Beth and Lindsay joined Katie in giving Sadie sympathetic hugs. LeShawna turned her anger over to the handsome host, in disbelief that he pulled a fast one on the rules even if it meant saving her from sharing in Sadie's fate. Heather noticed that her own teammates seemed rather displeased with the news, believing that they probably would have been better off with her losing than moving on to the next round.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "That would've been icing on the cake for Heather to have lost to Sadie. Sadie, people!" /_Sighs_./ "It would've been so sweet and Sadie would've really won my respect. She almost had it!"

Noah - "I wasn't expecting to see Katie best Sadie in an eating contest. Guess you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. I don't know why, but these people have been impressing me as of late."

* * *

"Alright, so now it's on to Round Two!" the handsome host announced, moving the challenge along. "Who wants pizza?" A cheer was let out from the audience while the remaining participants groaned. If the pizza was going to be anything like it was back on the show, the experience was going to be far from pleasant. "In this round, each team will be given a pizza to eat. Everyone on the team must eat at least one slice. Eat it at the same time if you want, but you gotta eat it."

"You make it sound like each team won't have the same pizza as the other," Beth commented aloud as she accompanied her eliminated teammates in joining Gwen and Ezekiel to the side of the stage.

"Excellent observation, Beth," Chris said. "You get a cookie!" Jessica tossed Beth a chocolate chip cookie after the statement was made. Since the cookie came from the R.A., Beth had no trouble happily enjoying an actual treat. "And she is correct, ladies and gentlemen. Each team will have a different pizza they will be eating from what their opposition will be chowing down on. How is that so? Because it will be the opposition who will pick the toppings!"

Chef appeared on stage and dropped a table at the center. On it were thirty small bowls, each with a wide variety of disgusting toppings. The sight of which caused the audience to gag.

"As you can see, we have a number of tasty delights for the contests to choose from in order to inflict pain upon their opponents' taste buds," Chris noted with a chuckle. "And I gotta say, Team Four might be rather happy to have Bridgette on their side because they don't have to deal with any sort of rotten meat on their slices. But the others do! For you see, each team does not get the same selection of toppings to use as well. Three per pizza sounds reasonable. Follow that up with us randomly selecting which team gets what pizza and this is sure to be disgusting fun for everyone."

"You mean... someone is going to have eat... these?" Bridgette gasped as she looked upon the slimy creatures wiggling about in the bowls before her team. "Oh gosh... That's so cruel... I-I don't think I can..."

"Better them than us," Courtney noted to her friend and roommate. "Now come on, we have to pick three toppings that would eliminate whichever team gets it. Let's see, I think we should..." Her voice began to trail off as she noticed that three bowls on the table were already empty. She had a very good idea who emptied them.

"Perfect!" Izzy cheered in celebration. "A tapeworm, earwig, and horse botfly pizza! Yummy! And the best part is that you don't even have to cook the pizza! It's just as good raw!" Her teammates looked looked more disturbed than ever before. Then they looked up at the crazy girl who was their teammate.

"Izzy, we're trying to make them sick, not kill them," Noah pointed out.

"Alright, students!" Chris called. "I believe all three teams have made their choices. It's time to bake them." Chef picked up the three uncooked pizza plates from their respective tables. He then spun around, so as not to give away which plate came from which team. A big oven was rolled out and he three two of the plates inside.

"How come only two of the plates are going in the oven?" Beth asked.

"Good question, Beth," Chris answered. "You get another cookie!" Jessica tossed Beth an oatmeal cookie. "Even though the members of Team One dodged the bullet in having a handicap two weeks in a row, they still have to push through the disadvantage they have for this week's challenge. And Chef believes that pizza shouldn't be cooked in an oven."

A fryer was then rolled out onto the stage and the remaining pizza Chef had in hand was thrown into it. The audience began to moan and gag at the through of fried pizza with whatever disgusting toppings were added. Team One were very fearful of what they find themselves eating shortly.

Less than five minutes later, the three pizza plates were pulled out. Chef casually tossed them onto the tables. Team Four had what appeared to be a pizza with poison ivy, chili pepper, and crunchy dog food bits. To no one's surprise, only Izzy was not sicked by the sight of their current feast. In fact, she was very much looking forward to it. Team Three had a pizza consisting of egg shells, big toe nail clippings, and hair. Duncan was highly suspicious that the hair didn't come from someone's head. Team One apparently ended up with Izzy's creation. The dish being fried made it look much worse than it was raw. Many in the audience felt quite sick and Ezekiel ended up barfing a second time.

"Oh man, that's so gross!" Chris laughed. "Remember that each of you only need to eat one slice. Now then, contestants. Ready? And... Bon appetit!"

As expected, Izzy and Owen happily dug into their slices of pizza. Eva and Duncan bravely ate their slices with little trouble. As did Tyler and Geoff. Most everyone else slowly took their time to even lift their respective slices from the plates.

"I can't believe I'm eating dog food and poison ivy," Bridgette whimpered quietly, though she nevertheless continued to eat.

"One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight-nine," Trent quietly muttered, counting the number of times he chewed his bite before swallowing. He took a deep breath and repeated the cycle.

"Yuck," Eva managed to utter, though it didn't sound like she was expressing any sort of feeling and just said it for the sake of saying anything at all.

Then came the wonderful sound of someone hurling. Follow by the gags and moans of the audience in response.

"Man oh man, that was awesome!" the handsome host laughed. "All it took was one itty bitty bite for Justin McGorgeous and he was purging like a true supermodel! You really do have a strict diet, dude."

Justin formed a very nervous smile at his teammates, who glared at him for losing the round for them so quickly. Though Heather just looked away a sighed, relieved that she wasn't on the receiving end of the hatred at the moment.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Justin - "See! Now he's made me purged earlier than scheduled!"

Eva - "He barfed after one bite? Weakling! Why is it that hottest, gorgeous men are the most pathetic?"

Noah - "The Anti-Me making a fool of himself in front of a live audience and to be shown later on television. Excellent."

* * *

"Two teams remain standing as we move into the third round," Chris announced to the audience as the recently eliminated team made their way to the side of the stage. "We had the appetizer and the first course. Time for the main course. Pasta! Each team will have to finish off a gigantic stuffed ravioli plate. And when I say gigantic, I mean gigantic."

Chef wheeled out two ravioli plates. Both were the size of Owen's head. The majority of the remaining contestants flinched at what they would eventually had to eat, seeing as this would likely fill them up. Should they manage to survive the first bite.

"Each ravioli will be stuffed with five different ingredients," Chris further explained. "All of them as disgusting as we're allowed at the present moment. Not saying you're ruining the fun, Bridgette, but man oh man we're missing out on some wicked action without more meat by products. As for what exactly will be stuffed into the ravioli, the ingredients will be chosen for you. Not by your opposition this time. But by Gwen and Ezekiel!"

"Eh...?" Ezekiel squeaked. His eyes shooting open and the color of his skin paling at the idea that he was going to intentionally harm people. And he had tried so hard to apologize to all the girls as it was, now he was going to make them suffer.

"Ugh!" Gwen groaned. "I should've known you'd pull something like this." She was quite upset at having to be responsible for inflicting damage to people she didn't really dislike. Not to mention there was a good chance he was going to make her pick the ingredients for the ravioli going to Trent's team.

"I told you that you two would play an active role in this challenge," Chris snickered. "Don't worry, you won't be dealing to the obvious choices. Not out of sympathy, mind you. It's mostly because we figured you would pick the weakest ingredients. We want to up the grossness factor here, alright? So Gwen will be picking ingredients for Team Four and Ezekiel will be picking for Team Three. You get to choose from the remaining twenty-one bowls not used in the last round."

Gwen sighed as she went over which ingredients to choose. While she was relieved she wasn't picking for Trent's team, she still had to make a pair of good friends in Geoff and Bridgette suffer. Given the ingredients remaining she could choose from, this was going to be a pleasant eating experience. Maybe for Izzy, but definitely not for Bridgette. After some mental deliberation she decided upon eggplant, cardboard, soap, cotton, and lard.

Ezekiel looked at what ingredients remained and then looked over at the team he would be serving. More specifically, his roommate Duncan. The prairie boy was concerned that when the challenge was over the punk was going to want to return the damage in spades. Instead, Duncan just rolled his eyes and shrugged. Not like Ezekiel had much of a choice now. With a deep breath, he randomly picked earthworms, shaving cream, paper, shoe laces, and cockroaches. Once Chef took both ravioli away to be cooked, Ezekiel proceeded to barf a third time.

Five minutes later, the teams were served their ravioli. The audience gasped and gagged in anticipation. Most of the contestants who were about to eat flinched when both ravioli began to slightly move. Izzy licked her lips with delight.

"Remember, everyone has to eat," Chris noted. "Chef will make sure of that." The contestants watched as Chef appeared seemingly out of nowhere suddenly behind them. Harold glared at him, wondering if the big man had recently learned some ninja skills. "Ready... Set... Paramedics on stand by... And... Bon appetit!"

Izzy started to dig in with a cheer. With great hesitation, the other nine contestants began eating as well. And every one of them started groaning after the first bite.

"I think my cheeks are on fire!" Cody cried.

"This is sick!" Courtney complained.

"I'll never complain about mom's cooking ever again!" Harold whined.

"I doubt this'll digest!" Noah yelled.

"... four-five-six-seven-eight-nine," Trent muttered in counting each chew, his watering eyes closed tight.

"This is causing a reaction to the poison ivy from the pizza!" Geoff screamed.

"The earthworms are still alive!" Tyler noted.

"Hey Gwen, can I have the recipe?" Izzy asked in a rather nonchalant way.

"I'm starting to miss prison food!" Duncan fumed. "How dare you do that to me, Chris!"

Bridgette didn't complain immediately like most of the others. She silently whimpered as she tried to chew her food and then swallowed. Only the swallowing was complete and she knew it. Her teary eyes shot wide open and her hands on her neck, she began to have trouble breathing.

Ezekiel was the first to notice this. "B-B-Bridgette!" he squeaked. His eyes shot open and his entire body shaking in terror. "Sh-Sh-She's choking!"

All attention was turned to the surfer girl, the entire amphitheater gasping in shock. Geoff screamed and wrapped his arms around his girlfriend. His focus completely lost in the panic, he struggled to figure out what to do.

"Now this is an interesting predicament," Chris chuckled. "Spitting out food, even if to avoid choking, constitutes as throwing up. So what will it be? Somehow manage to get that piece of disgusting food down your throat or surrender to defeat in order to spit that sucker out. What will it be?"

"You evil bastard!" Gwen growled at the handsome host. "How could you enjoy watching Bridgette decide between choking to death or eliminate her team just to save her life?"

"I have the paramedics on stand by," Chris reasoned. "They've been monitoring the whole challenge off stage. If they think someone is physically reaching a point that cannot be easily handled on their own, they'll step in to save the day. And since they haven't appeared yet, Bridgette will just have to make a decision on what to do."

"I... I... think I can... swallow..." Bridgette tried to say in between gasps. She continued to whimper and moan, tears flowing out of her eyes as she used all her might to force the food down her throat. At roughly a minute of struggling, she let out a long exhale. "There..." she barely squeaked.

"Alright, babe!" Geoff cheered.

But before he could celebrate any further, all heard a sound. It came from Bridgette's stomach. And it was not a good sign.

"My stomach can't take it," the surfer girl cried.

"No, babe!" Geoff cried in response. "Don't give in! Don't give up!" There were two obvious reasons why he didn't want her to. He didn't want to see his girlfriend be responsible for losing the challenge. And he still had her in his arms, thereby he would be a target for whatever projectile would be hurled out of her mouth.

"It's so gross!" Bridgette cried, her tears literally falling everywhere around her. "I've never been so sick in my life!"

"You can fight through this, Bridge!" Geoff said, doing all he could to ease and comfort her. "You don't have to eat the whole thing. You already took a bite, you can just take another or two. Just don't--"

The ever lovable sounding of purging was heard. It had a squishy quality that made many in the audience squirm in disgust. When that passed, everyone exhaled their vocal disbelief at the barf they had witnessed.

Because it didn't come from Bridgette.

"What a turn of events!" Chris laughed with joy. "Team Four is eliminated, but not by Bridgette! But by Noah!"

"She was crying all over the food!" Noah complained while trying to catch his breath. "I'm serious! Her tears were raining upon every inch of the ravioli! It's like a sixth ingredient was added!"

Izzy took a bite of the ravioli, making sure to eat a piece that had as much of Bridgette's tears. She chewed for a moment and swallowed. Then she turned at Noah, narrowing her eyes. "Wimp!" she yelled. "It gave it a salty texture!"

Noah barfed again. Courtney followed. Then Geoff, who managed to turn away from his girlfriend to do so. And finally Bridgette, though she caught some of Geoff's back. Her purging lasted a good five seconds, resulting in some of the loudest squirming and moaning the audience had vocalized yet. When Geoff turned around, he did so in time to catch her when she fainted.

"What?" Izzy asked, oblivious to how her words was what caused the messy chaos around her.

"Oh my boxers, that was gross!" Chris said, feeling quite sick in the stomach himself. "I've never seen so much hurling since watching in a movie theater that scene in Scary Movie with the gym teacher!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - /_Sobs_./ "This is why I'm a vegetarian! They're healthy and actually good for you! Why do you enjoy making us suffer, Chris? Why are you so mean?"

Noah - "The least she could've done was cry away from the food! Cry on Geoff's shoulder, that's all she had to do! But no! She had to cry on the food that we had to eat! And I was complimenting these people earlier!"

Courtney - "It was bad enough we were eliminated because of Noah's complaining. Izzy didn't have to go and do something so vile as to accuse us of having bad taste!"

* * *

"Now that everything has been... cleaned up on the stage and... everybody is feeling better, we can move on to the final round!" the handsome host announced. "The all boys team managed to survive the previous three rounds without once refusing to eat or losing their lunch. In a way, you could say that Cody, Duncan, Harold, Trent, and Tyler really did manage to work as a team. But from here on out, it's every man for himself! We come full circle with the 'All for One and One for All' mentality with an Iron Man Eating Contest! Last one left standing wins this week's grand prize!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Tyler - "Yes! Final Five! Woo hoo! I'm winning this for sure!"

Cody - "Holy cow! I can't believe I made it this far! I have a chance of actually winning a challenge!"

Trent - "Well... I haven't felt too sick yet. I'm still wondering if all this will be worth it in the end."

Harold - "My mad skillz have not failed me yet. Victory is within reach. Unfortunately, my valiant comrades must fall for me to achieve glory. To work together for a common goal only to stab each other in the back for personal gain."

Duncan - /_Chuckling_./ "Perfect. Now I just have to find an opening and I can take Harold down."

* * *

Chef slid out five small tables and five chairs for the remaining contestants to sit at. Once they all nervously sat down, Chef reappeared on stage and served them their dishes. Duncan took one look and groaned.

"You have got to be kidding me," he grumbled. He then turned to Chris with a glare.

"That's right, Duncan," Chris snickered. "Our final round is all about eating some of your favorite dishes from last season's Brunch of Disgustingness! Stage One is stew made from banana peels, dead fish, and soda cans! You boys will feast upon bowl after bowl after bowl until someone surrenders or pukes."

"You mean I could end up eating nine bowls of this stuff if none of us is eliminated for that long?" Harold asked.

"Wicked, huh?" the handsome host chuckled. "Ready? If not, too bad! Bon appetit!"

The boys reluctantly began eating their stew. Right away, Cody and Harold began to squirm upon their first taste. Tyler made goofy faces in reaction to what was in his mouth. Duncan and Trent didn't display the kind of extreme expressions the others were, given how they've eaten the dish before. Though it didn't mean they could tolerate it any less.

The contestants surprised everyone, especially themselves, as they each managed to reach their third bowl of the stuff. Although Cody looked quite scared to even touch the stew for a third time. This didn't go unnoticed.

"You refusing to eat, techno-geek?" Chef asked him with a stern look.

"N-No!" Cody squeaked, shaking as he was clearly intimidated by the cook. "It's j-just that I-I feel like I'm f-full."

"I don't care if you're full!" Chef huffed. "Just eat it!"

Cody nodded and immediately began to sip at his stew. Only he was sipping too fast, causing him to fail to notice that he managed to swallow the entire fish head. The second he tasted it in his mouth, he began gagging in terror. With all hope lost, Cody had no choice but to purge. His adoring female fans moaned in sorrow at his losing the challenge.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Cody - "Aw man. I feel such the biggest loser right now. There were all these girls cheering for me. And I let them down."

Beth - "Poor Cody. He was so close. I think it would've been nice to see him win a challenge for himself."

* * *

"Oh, too bad Codester," Chris commented as the other contestants sighed as not having to eat the stew any further. "Although it might just as well been your loss. Because the grand prize is certainly something the other four would certainly appreciate, if you ask me. Make things more... enjoyable, to say the least."

The remaining four contestants looked at one another with nervous glances. Despite the assurance that the prizes through their time at Richmore would be good, they still didn't trust Chris to be a man of his word when it came to anything positive. Anything positive for them and not him.

"Okay, on to Stage Two," the handsome host announced. "How about a nice shake to wash away the food you've been eating? Rather, a shake made purely out of the liquefied odor glands of skunks!" Chef dropped before each contestant a cup of some vile looking substance. "Remember, you'll keep drinking until someone's out. Bon appetit!"

Harold squirmed even before placing his lips on the cup. He was joined shortly by Trent and Tyler once the drink entered their mouths. Duncan continued to show no visible expression of being sick. They barely got started on their second fill of the shake when Tyler began gagging. Seconds later, he had purged.

"Oh no!" Lindsay cried. "Trevor!" The blonde immediately ran out to her boyfriend, who by this point had dropped to his knees in exhaustion. Disregarding that part of his body was covered in puke, she wrapped her arms around him.

"Aw man," Tyler moaned quietly. "I lost, babe."

"But you didn't lose," Lindsay noted in comfort. "And that makes you a winner to me, my big silly Tiger."

Of the wrong names Lindsay had called him since they first met, Tiger was the one he didn't mind being called at all. In fact, he noticed that she said this whenever there was a romantic spark in the air. Never mind that he had just regurgitated seconds ago, he was not about to pass up the opportunity to receive a kiss from her.

Though everyone else felt quite sick seeing it happen. Even more so when both made sudden gag noises. The two didn't seem to care, but everyone watching thought it was probably as disgusting as the food being served in the challenge.

"That was... sickenly sweet... you two..." Chris managed to say, rolling his lips in an effort to further close his mouth so that he wouldn't puke. "Maybe you should... you know... wash up first if you wanna continue..."

"But we'll miss the rest of the challenge, Chuck," Lindsay pointed out.

"I'm sure there's some water off stage," Chris responded. He watched as Tyler carried Lindsay off stage while the two maintained a loving embrace. "And the name's Chris!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Lindsay and Tyler - /_Both are in towels, having had showers, and are making out. For a very long time._/

Heather - /_Knocking very loudly from outside the door._/ "Hello! You've two have been in there for two hours! There are other people here who want to go in there! ... Lindsay? ... Tyler? ... Hello!"

* * *

"Well, how about we try to get through the rest of the challenge quickly so that we won't turn the amphitheater into a vomit-oriam, shall we?" the handsome host announced.

"With two stages to go, I think it'll be too late by then," Duncan muttered quietly so that only Trent and Harold heard.

"Stage Three features another tasty delight," Chris continued as Chef appeared with three bowls for the contestants. "French Bunion Soup with hangnail crackers!" While Harold and Trent squirmed at the sight, Duncan made his first visual reaction to the disgusting food in the round. He shut his eyes shut tightly and inhaled through his teeth. "Live it! Love it! Eat it! Bon appetit!"

The three were five bowls in and looking none too happy that they were still going. Duncan glanced over at Harold, who was on the other side of Trent. The punk surveyed what was around them and decided upon a course of action. He figured it was risky, since it could end up costing Trent before Harold, but he figured he didn't have much of a choice. Acting now would make it seem less obvious what he was doing than if he tried it going one-on-one with Harold.

Duncan picked up the bowl, leaned his head back, and started pour. He ignored the foul stench and taste of the soup while hearing the moans and screams of the audience. He even managed to hear Courtney squirm in disgust. Having finished every last drop, he dropped the bowl and let out an exhale.

He then looked to be trying to maintain some balance, having leaned back enough that he could easily tip over. He grabbed Trent, who was about to start on a sip, to regain his composure. This caused Trent to lose some balance in turn. So out of instinct, Trent grabbed Harold to reposition himself proper. Harold, on the other hand, didn't have any one to grab onto and threw his arms about in a futile attempt to right himself. Thus, when he fell back he had contorted himself in a way that he landed on his stomach. And as a result, he puked out quite the projectile that the audience screamed in horror.

"Geez, Harold!" Chris gagged, though there was a hint of chuckling in his voice. "You almost hit the curtain! Where the prize pile is! That's why we have the buckets here, dude!"

"I lost my balance!" Harold cried, stating the obvious.

"And therefore, you lost your lunch!" Chris chuckled. "That means, you lost the challenge!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Cackles in a rather sinister manner._/

LeShawna - "I know for a fact Duncan pulled a fast one in order for Harold to intentionally lose! And I bet Ms. C.I.T. enjoyed it too! They think they can get away with messing with my baby? They're dead wrong! It! Is! So! On!"

* * *

"This prize better be worth it, Chris," Duncan grumbled.

"Oh, I'm sure it will be worth it," Chris snickered before turning his attention to the audience. "The final stage of the final round is now! And what better way to end such a lovely feast than feeding our final two contestants the most popular dish to ever be introduced on the show...

"Bull testicles!"

Every male in the audience screamed in sheer terror while the girls squirmed and moaned at having to lay eyes upon the dish. Their reactions, though, paled in comparison to how scared and sick Duncan and Trent felt. Chef went the distance in dressing up like a French waiter, gently pushing out a cart, and removing the covers to unveil two plates covered with their meal.

"Why are you doing this again to our bovine brothers, dude?" Geoff asked in crying horror from off stage.

"Because it's fun!" Chris replied with laughter. "Need I remind you two that you must continue to eat these babies until someone calls it quits. Either voluntarily giving up or involuntarily barfing. Eat or surrender, boys! Bon appetit!"

Both Duncan and Trent squirmed as they slowly picked up their first piece and then took a small bite. The audience didn't stop gagging and moaning one second as the contestants continued bravely to eat. The only one who was enjoying this display of torture was Chris, who was chuckling every thirty seconds.

Duncan was about to start on his tenth piece, feeling quite tired and sick from head to toe. It was requiring him to muster every strength he had to keep eating when he paused for a moment. He slowly turned to watch Trent eat. The music man had water forming in his eyes, his fists clenched tight, and shaking every second. Yet he was still eating.

"... four-five-six-seven-eight-nine," Trent muttered. He was also still counting the times he chewed. It was also the first time that Duncan noticed something else about the music man counting.

"Why the hell do you count to nine?" the punk groaned quietly.

"It's my lucky number..." Trent struggled to reply, sounding as if he had a raspy voice.

"Lucky number?" Duncan asked, raising a curious brow. "Where'd that come from?"

"Not telling..." Trent answered.

"I bet it's because it's the number of letters in yours and Gwen's name," Duncan chuckled.

"No it's not!" Trent quietly responded. Then he paused and thought about it. "Wait a sec... two-three... nine... Huh. You're right. It does add up to nine. Nine really is my lucky number!"

That was too much for Duncan to take.

The punk grabbed the nearest empty bucket and hurled. The audience screamed. Some in disbelief. Some in horror. Some in delight. But the loudest scream came from off stage. Courtney could not believe that Duncan lost to Trent in a challenge that logically should have been to the music man's disadvantage.

"And Duncan purges!" Chris cheered. "Which makes Trent the winner of Brunch of Disgustingness!"

Trent's eyes shot wide open and grabbed his neck as he began to gag. "Trash can, trash can, trash can!" he pleaded. Gwen was the first to react, immediately running off stage to grab a large trash can. She rushed back on stage and placed it in front of her boyfriend, who proceeded to hurl inside it. It lasted a good nine seconds before he finally stopped and collapsed on the floor.

"Trent!" Gwen cried. She quickly dropped down on her knees next to him, placing his head on his lap. He moaned quietly while she pulled out a napkin and wiped the remnants of his barf from his face.

"Sorry..." Trent managed to whisper.

"That's okay," she said with a sigh and a smile. "Besides, you won a challenge by yourself."

"I did, didn't I," Trent mused with a smile of his own.

"Congratulations Trent!" Chris announced. "Not only did you win the challenge, but you also had the most awesome purge I had ever seen in my life! Man, that must've been a month's worth you threw up!"

"Can you just tell him what he won so he can rest?" Gwen growled at the handsome host.

Chris returned the goth girl's glare for a moment before he shrugged. "Fine, be that way," he said. "Spoil the moment, why don't you." He cleared his throat before he continued. "As the winner of this week's challenge, Trent receives the grand prize. Dinner!"

"What?" Gwen seethed. "You mean he suffered through all that crap for a lousy dinner?"

"I'm not finish!" Chris responded. "As I was about to say, he has won dinner for two tomorrow night at one of the most luxurious fine dining restaurants in all of Kitchener. Real food that's really good. The producers are flipping the bill, so you and your partner, do I even need to guess who'll that be, can order to your hearts' content."

The big screen monitor appeared once again and projected a slideshow. The pictures of the restaurant and the food it served left the audience in awe. Fancy wouldn't even begin to describe how good it looked to them.

"Doesn't sound bad," Trent said quietly.

"But wait!" Chris added. "There's more! You two will be having some rich privacy as you dine at the top floor of the restaurant. All alone. Your only company being a well known and well respected singer. That's right, dinner and a show just for you. We'll even leave the cameras at home."

"No cameras?" Gwen gasped with joy. She then lifted her boyfriend enough to give him a loving embrace. Trent widened his smile, seeing how happy this made his girlfriend.

"You weren't kidding when you said this was a prize I'd appreciate," the music man said to Chris.

"Awesome, huh," the handsome host snickered. "Just be sure to wear some nice, fancy clothes. Both of you."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie and Sadie - Katie - "Oh my gosh! Won't that be, like, so romantic?"  
Sadie - "I know, right? Gwen and Trent are such a cute couple!"  
Katie - "They're, like, totally the cutest couple on the show!"  
Sadie - "Even cuter than Lindsay and Tyler?"  
Katie - "Good question. They are really cute."  
Sadie - "Who are all the couples again?"  
Katie - "There's Gwen and Trent. Lindsay and Tyler. Duncan and Courtney. Harold and LeShawna. Izzy and Owen. Me and--" /_Immediately slaps her hands over her mouth, gasping in horror over what she was about to say._/  
Sadie - /_In shock._/ "Y-You have a boyfriend?"  
Katie - /_Blushing_./ "... Not yet."  
Sadie - /_Gets excited._/ "You have a crush?" /_Katie nods in embarrassment._/ "Who isn't Justin?" /_Katie nods again._/ "Is it Cody?" /_Katie shakes her head._/ "It's someone else?" /_Katie nods._/ "Katie has a crush! Eeeee! Who is it? Tell me, tell me!"  
Katie - "Not yet. Not in here.  
Sadie - /_Whining_./ "When?"  
Katie - "The cameras don't shut down until midnight, right? So..."  
Sadie - /_Sad_./ "Aww! I wanna know now!"

Duncan - /_Groans and hangs his head._/ "I just had to lose my focus because of Trent's silly little obsession with the number nine. And I bet Courtney would've loved that dinner date with me had I won."

Gwen - "I'm not much for fine dining. But since it's coming out of Chris' pockets, there'll be no cameras, and it's a private dinner date with Trent, I'll be sure to have a really good time."

Trent - /_Swoons_./ "The dinner and a show just for us is a bonus to me. The real prize is getting to spend a romantic evening with Gwen and not have to spend a penny. Plus, I can't wait to see what dress she'll wear."

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Still dressed as an angel and playing the harp, but is not singing._/  
Owen - /_Still dressed as Cupid and is still singing off key_./ "And IIIIIIIIII-eeeee-IIIIIIIIII will always love yooooou!"  
Izzy - /_Belches and giggles._/

* * *

Here is a recap of who was on what team and the results:

**Team One** - DJ, Eva, Heather, Justin, Owen (Third Place)

**Team Two** - Beth, Katie, LeShawna, Lindsay, Sadie (Last Place)

**Team Three** - Cody, Duncan, Harold, Trent, Tyler (First Place)

**Team Four** - Bridgette, Courtney, Geoff, Izzy, Noah (Second Place)

Not Competing - Ezekiel, Gwen

Individual Performance - Cody (Fifth), Tyler (Fourth), Harold (Third), Duncan (Second), Trent (First)

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard

* * *

As some may have noticed, I also borrowed a couple ideas from **The Kobold Necromancer**. In particular the whole mention of Izzy wanting to steal Zeke's toque for it's cuteness powers and recently with Beth getting cookies. If you haven't read his stories, do so now. They are excellent pieces of work. I read them a lot, as you can tell. Looking forward to your reviews, folks!

---

**Next Up:** Some weekend downtime.


	6. Week 2, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Six

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Last time on Total Drama Academy...

After getting a chance to settle in, the students experienced their first full week at Richmore Academy. Beth, Cody, Courtney, Ezekiel, Gwen, Harold, Izzy, and Noah passed the entrance exam and were therefore eligible to attend classes with those who actually belonged. Zeke managed to apologize and be forgiven from most of the girls in the group, though he found himself on the receiving end of a teasing from some female students. Taking Bridgette's plea to keep an eye on the prairie boy way too far, Izzy made sure those girls got paid back in full.

Friday's Challenge Night saw the return of an old favorite. Brunch of Disgustingness! There was so much purging that you could fill a whole swimming pool. And it was awesome! Winning last week's challenge allowed Gwen a pass from competing and a random spin of the Random Loser Generator helped Zeke escape certain torture to his taste buds. Heather lucked out from having to compete two weeks in a row with a disadvantage when slow motion replay showed Sadie barfed before her. Tough luck for the hefty BFFFL, although her skinny counterpart has a crush on a fella who isn't Justin. Given the remaining males in the group who are single, I may end up questioning her taste in men.

The all boys team of Cody, Duncan, Harold, Trent, and Tyler made it to the final round, where it was every man for himself. One by one they fell, and Duncan made sure Harold was eliminated in embarrassing fashion. But in the end, Trent stunned the world when his number nine obsession worked in his favor. The music man managed to somehow keep his weak stomach from getting to him long enough to outlast the competition and win himself a private dinner date with Gwen at a really swank restaurant. Though when he did finally hurl, it was glorious!

The students haven't been here two weeks and already there's some serious drama going down. And it revolves around the heated situation involving Duncan, Courtney, Harold, and LeShawna. I dunno about you, but I'm betting there's going to be more than fireworks going off when all four have reached their boiling point. The destruction they'd leave behind would put the chaos Izzy creates to shame. So you can rest assure that I'm only going to intensify it even more in the challenge on Friday.

Who is Katie crushing on?

What will Gwen wear at the dinner?

Will Izzy and Owen continue to butcher romance songs?

Find out in another exciting episode of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Week 2, Day 1 - Saturday)**

Gwen was awakened by a pair of knocks at her door. She took her time getting out of bed and staggering over to the door. Upon opening it just slightly, the goth girl saw that it was the R.A. standing on the other side.

"Sorry to wake you this early," Jessica said. "But I figured you and Trent might wanna consider getting some fancy clothes for your dinner date tonight."

Gwen managed to raise a curious brow despite her tired state. "Is it really that important?" she said in a sleepy tone.

"Not really," Jessica replied. "But I figured since the producers are flipping the bill, you'd guys would consider taking advantage wear something possibly expensive.

"The cost of the dress will come out of Chris' pockets?" Gwen asked in delight. The R.A. nodded. "I'll be ready in fifteen minutes."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "The fine print comes to bite Chris in the ass. I love it!"

Chris - /_Laughs sarcastically_./

Trent - "I wanted to look good for Gwen, so of course I was going to go shopping for a fancy suit. I just didn't expect us to be joined by some of the others who decided they wanted to tag along."

LeShawna - "You know I was going to help Gwen look fa-ah-ine for her dinner date. But I was not gonna leave Harold alone for that punk and Ms. C.I.T. to get some open shots at him. So I made sure he came along."

Geoff - "When I heard Trent was going to shop for clothes to wear to his dinner date, I knew I had to help him out. I totally excel in making my buds look hot for the chicks, man. And Bridgette was cool with joining in to help Gwen look ravishing for my bud. We all also decided to bring Zeke along because the little dude's never been to a mall before. So we wanted him to see what he's been missing. He's sure to have a radical time, bra."

Ezekiel - "It was awf'ooly nice of them to bring me along, eh. I always wanted to visit a mall since seein' them on TV. I just wished Izzy an' Owen weren't the only ones sh'ooin' me around. It's like that sayin', eh. The m'oore, the merrier."

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Still dressed as an angel and still playing the harp_./  
Owen - /_Still dressed as Cupid and still singing badly off key_./ "Love lifts us up where we belong, Where eagles fly on a mountain high!"  
Izzy - "Love makes us act like we are fools, Throw our lives away for one happy day!"  
Owen - "We can be heroes just for one day."

Eva - /_Pounding on the door outside_./ "Will you two just shut up already? Especially you, Owen! Your singing sucks! I would know, I'm a horrible singer myself!"

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Looks at Owen for a moment then begins jamming on the harp_./  
Owen - /_Still singing in the wrong key_./ "Ah Satan sees Natasha, No devil lived on, Lonely Tylenol, Not a banana baton."

* * *

Gwen was rather surprised the saleswoman who approached them wasn't put off by her goth appearance. Even more surprising was that the woman also had no problem with bringing together the darkest dresses the store had available. Along with Bridgette and LeShawna, they immediately set up shop at the nearest dressing room where she would try each of the dresses one by one.

"I don't think any of the reds work," Gwen commented as she looked at herself in the mirror, wearing a dress of said color.

"Only in Christmas," Bridgette agreed. "Otherwise, they clash with your hair."

"Although the purple ones seem to work at times," LeShawna noted.

"Just as long as they're not too purple," the saleswoman added.

"Don't take this the wrong way, ma'am," Gwen started as she stepped back into the dressing stall to switch dresses. "I'm a bit amazed you're actually helping me out like this. All the other saleswomen I've encountered were either mortified or down right refused service just by taking a look at me."

"I have an older sister who is a goth," the saleswoman simply responded with a smile. "When you're four years old and you look at how she dresses, you tend to pick up a few pointers on how appease someone with similar fashion tastes."

"What does your sista do now?" LeShawna asked curiously.

"She's been living in England, trying to make it as a punk rocker," the saleswoman answered. "Has had some successes and failures, but she's enjoying herself nonetheless."

"That sounds pretty cool," Bridgette stated.

Moments later, Gwen emerged from the dressing stall wearing the next dress. It was a very dark purple with a black corset over the abdomen region. To Bridgette and LeShawna, it looked very much like a dress Gwen would wear.

"Now that is going in the favorites pile," LeShawna said with a nod.

"The black ruffles really add to the appeal," Bridgette added.

"I'd say have some neck wear and you'll definitely knock 'em dead," the saleswoman commented.

* * *

"Sir, I appreciate the offer," Trent said, trying to remain calm. "I just don't think brown or anything light suits me well. I would prefer something that's in a dark green, purple, or blue. If you can, I'd to know if any of the blue you have is teal."

"Fine, whatever," the salesman sighed. He had a very apparent effeminate voice and attitude. "I guess that's a no go with the red, then. I still think you would look fab in one of those."

"I'm sure I would," Trent lied. "But could you please respect my wishes and help us find me a suit that have one of the colors I requested? I would very much appreciate some service there."

"Okay," the salesman sighed again. "If you say so, hot stuff." The salesman took another good look of Trent from head to toe before turning and walking away.

"Is every salesman like that?" Harold asked in confusion.

"No," Geoff replied. "But they tend to be the ones that pop up when you're looking for something for an awesome occasion."

"And they're really annoying in trying something else when you already have an idea of what you want," Trent added. "When I was looking for a suit for the first time Gwen and I went on a dinner date, this one salesman just would not give up on trying make me wear this ridicules pink suit. He said it would match Gwen's cheeks."

"There's a laugh," Geoff chuckled.

"Is there any way to avoid them?" Harold asked.

"Not really," Trent answered. "You just have to hope one of the good ones manage to beat them to you. Otherwise, you're going to be spending an awful amount of time looking for a suit that you like."

"Which is where having buds comes in handy," Geoff said. He stood up and revealed a pile of suits from behind him, all in dark shades of either green, purple, or blue. "Because you don't want to rely solely on the salesman, bra."

"Oh, okay," Harold nodded, mentally taking to heart the advice they were giving him.

* * *

"Are you sure the f'oontain is there to j'oomp in?" Ezekiel asked with a raised brow. "I thought people thr'oo coins in there for good luck, eh. And isn't the water barely two feet deep?"

"People throw coins in there because they're too busy shopping for a good dive," Izzy replied with a giggle. "And they don't wanna get the stuff that they bought all wet. But since we have bought anything yet, it's the perfect time to jump."

"But from the top floor?" Ezekiel further asked.

"A lot more fun than jumping from ground level!" Izzy answered. "C'mon, Zeke! This'll be fun! Like when we all jumped off that thousand foot cliff in the shark infested lake."

"I hit some rocks on the way d'oon, th'oo," Ezekiel pointed out in panic. "And I still think the water's too shall'oo, eh."

"Don't be scared, Zeke," Izzy said. "You gotta face your fears. I'll jump with you!" Before allowing the prairie boy any time to even think it over, Izzy picked him up and immediately jumped over the railing.

Ezekiel screamed while Izzy cackled as they fell two stories into the water fountain. Izzy landed first, nearly slamming upon the bottom of the water. Ezekiel landed on her, which cushioned the impact of his landed. Though he was still left shaking.

"See!" Izzy managed to utter through the pain and somehow maintain a cheery mood as she emerged from the water. "That was so much fun!" She paid no attention to the onlookers as she shook her head to dry her hair. Then she looked up to her large boyfriend back at the top floor. "Okay, Owen! Your turn!"

Ezekiel's eyes immediately shot open with terror. He knew right away what was about to happen and he struggled to get out of the fountain right away. He had just made it out when he heard the sound of certain destruction descend from the sky.

"Wheeeeeeeeee!" Owen squealed as he fell from the second floor. Doing a belly flop into the fountain.

The entire mall rumbled upon impact.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "The police agreed not to press charges if we promised to never let Owen and Izzy back in the mall ever again. Jessica talked them into allowing Zeke to return so long as he's under real supervision."

* * *

"Talk to him," Sadie pressured Katie in a whisper.

"I will," Katie quietly tried to assure her BFFFL. "You're making me nervous."

"Then just go already," Sadie pushed.

Katie bit her lower lip, still not quite sure if she should go through with it. But when push came to shove from Sadie, there was no turning back. She took a deep breath and nervously walked into the center of the living space. There were two other occupants at the moment, both sitting at opposite ends of the couch. At one end was DJ, paying a great deal of attention to his rabbit Bunny. On the other end was Noah, very much absorbed in his book reading. Katie came to a stop just behind DJ and began to twirl her hair with a free finger nervously.

"Hi, DJ," she managed to say.

"Hey, Katie," the big guy replied, looking up to see her briefly with a smile before returning his attention to Bunny.

Katie took a deep breath, looking as if she wanted to say something. Then she stepped over to the other end of the couch, thereby standing behind Noah.

"Noah, can I ask you a favor?" she asked.

Noah looked up from his book with a confused brow raised. He could not fathom what one of the would-be twins could possibly want. From him of all people. "Depends on the favor," he managed to say in reply.

Katie bit her lower lip, nervously trying to find the right words to say next. "I..." she uttered before pausing. She took a deep breath and continued. "I was wondering if... you could... help me... study... for some classes."

Noah blinked for a moment before turning to face the skinny BFFFL. "You want me to help you study for classes," he loosely repeated in his ever cynical tone. "Of everyone else here you could possibly go to for help with your studies, you pick me."

"Because you're really smart and... and..." she tried to reason only to trail off badly. She took another deep breath. "There's this college I want to go to that is, like, such the place to go to for me to be a fashion designer. But I need the right grades in certain classes. I was hoping... you know... since you like to come up with clever solutions and all... you could... help me..."

Noah stared at her for a moment, wondering if she was being serious or if this was just some lame joke to punk him into being associated with the would-be twins. Given that she looked like she might burst into tears, it was probably the former. He shrugged and turned back to his book. "Just let me know when you need my help and I'll help you," he said.

Katie smiled brightly. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" she said in excitement. She took a deep breath, looking to add something else to say. Then she stopped back to being behind DJ. "Bye, DJ!"

"Later, Katie," DJ said, looking up to smile at her and then placing his attention back on Bunny.

Katie immediately turned and walked in a very nervous fashion back to Sadie. Sadie looked rather upset, having bounced on her heel the entire time and feeling the results weren't quite satisfactory.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie and Sadie - Sadie - "You could have, like, done so much more!"  
Katie - /_Sighs_./ "I know."  
Sadie - "You really didn't get to say anything!"  
Katie - "I know, I know!" /_Sighs_./ "At least Noah will help me with my studies."  
Sadie - "Oh my gosh! I so can't wait to model your designs down the runway at Bryant Park!"  
Katie - /_Starts getting excited again_./ "Totally! It'll be such a dream come true!"

* * *

"Gretchen and Toby's dinner tonight is going to be so romantic," Lindsay cooed, sitting on her jock boyfriend's lap. Then she began to pout. "I wish I could have a romantic dinner like that."

"We will, babe," Tyler said, tightening the embrace he had around his blonde girlfriend. "And when you and I paint the town red, everyone will know what an awesome couple we are."

"Awww," Lindsay swooned. "That's so sweet, Tiger."

That was Tyler's cue to engage in gentle, passionate kissing with the woman he loved. And he wasted no time placing his lips upon hers. Soon enough, they forgot that they were in the amphitheater just killing time. They also forgot they they didn't exactly come here alone.

"Say Beth," Cody asked, clearing his throat beforehand in his attempt to avoid staring at the couple making out right next to him. "Think maybe we should, you know, give this place a name."

"What do you mean?" Beth asked curiously, also wanting to avoid getting distracted by her friend in the middle of some sweet loving. "Everyone seems fine with calling it the amphitheater."

"For now, sure," Cody nodded. "But you know how we all like to give things names, cheesy or not. The amphitheater being one of them. Great places have unique names, you know. Before it became Rogers Centre, the stadium over in Toronto was known as SkyDome. Down in New York, they have Madison Square Garden. The Calgary Flames play at Pengrowth. Silly as it may sound, I think this place needs a better name than Riker Hall Amphitheater."

"You know, that's a good idea Cody," Beth said with excitement. Then she paused and put thought about it for a moment. "How do we go about naming this place, then?"

"Well," Cody began, tapping his chin to think. "I guess the best way would be to name it after something from the show. Though I think it would be kinda sad to call it the Wawanakwa Amphitheater."

"It would, wouldn't it," Beth giggled. "Nor could we call it any of the team names because then those who were on the team whose name wasn't used would be upset."

"I don't think any other animal... for that matter... would suffice either," Cody added nervously, hoping to avoid any mention of one animal in particular during the conversation.

"There's gotta be something unique enough to use as the name," Beth wondered aloud.

The two sat in deep thought, physically doing all the clinches of someone thinking. Scratching the back of their head, tapping their chins, crossing their arms and rolling their eyes up, tapping their fingers together, tapping one foot, drawing an invisible circle on their knee with a finger. All of this while the only sound being heard was the constant exchange of saliva between Lindsay and Tyler. It was a good few minutes before someone finally spoke.

"All I can think of right now is marshmallows," Beth admitted with a sigh.

"Yeah, that's the only one I can think of too," Cody shrugged. "Chris put so much emphasis on them being the sign of life that they were pretty much one of the few good things on the island."

Beth started to giggle. "I like it," she said. "Calling this place 'The Marshmallow.' That would be so great."

"Alright, that settles it!" Cody proclaimed. "We'll name this place 'The Marshmallow Theater,' or simply 'The Marshmallow.' I'm sure the others won't mind." As if on instinct, this looked over at Lindsay and Tyler. Who were still making out. "You know, I'm actually surprised Lindsay didn't go to the mall with some of the others."

"Jessica said that the spending budget would only be for the clothes Gwen and Trent would wear tonight and lunch," Beth noted. "Everything else had to be purchased on their own dime and Lindsay said that the good sales aren't going on yet any way."

"Will someone tell me why we're all gathered here?" a voice suddenly asked. The four turned to see Eva sitting there. Her eyes focused upon the stage. Her voice causing the end of his making out with Lindsay annoyed Tyler.

"I'd ask you why you're here, Eva," the jock said sternly, feeling quite miffed that a bit of his privacy with Lindsay was being invaded. Shockingly, he didn't receive a death glare from the fitness buff.

"I got bored," Eva simply replied. "There was talking in here so I just sat down and listened in. I just didn't realize it would be while that was going on." She pointed to the stage to show everyone what she was talking about.

Before them was the sight of Chef Hatchet. In a pink tutu. Doing a ballet dance with the Nutcracker Suite playing. They all stared for a short moment before realizing that they had just scared themselves for many sleepless nights to come.

"So," Cody said, breaking the silence in an attempt to do something that would get them out of there as quickly as humanly possible. "Since Owen's at the mall, you guys wanna watch Star Trek on my computer?"

"Okay," Beth replied.

"I'm in," Tyler answered.

"Sounds good to me," Eva said.

"There's a TV in your computer?" Lindsay asked.

Seconds later, all five made an immediate exit out of the Marshmallow.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "The Marshmallow, huh? Ah, what the hey. Though I would've preferred the Chris McLean Amphitheater..."

Eva - "Just why the hell was Chef doing ballet in the Marshmallow any way? ... Wait a second... Did I just use that stupid name those geeks gave the amphitheater? ... Whatever."

* * *

"I... Hate... This... Place..." Heather grumbled as she wiped some more of the tomato remnants away from her eyes.

Feeling couped up in her room in a dorm surrounded by people she hated, and who hated her in turn, she decided to take a chance and explore the campus. Rather, she was looking for people she could, in her words, hold a respectable conversation worthy of her presence and association. Not less than ten minutes after she left Riker Hall, she was immediately pelted by tomatoes from the majority of students who obviously were familiar with her work on the show. She stopped running after realizing how futile it was to do so.

Once the random attacks managed to finally subside, she tried to make her way back to Riker Hall. She found the entrance overrun by a number of screaming girls. After a moment of trying to look over as many shoulders and heads as possible, she discovered that they had gathered because Justin was doing a rather public photo shoot. She didn't know why and she didn't really care. With a scoff, she decided to try looking for another way into the dorm and back into her room.

"So, you're the one called Heather, right?" a voice asked suddenly.

Heather stopped dead in her tracks, groaned, and turned to the speaker. "Just go ahead and get it over with already," she growled. "It's not like a few more tomatoes could make this day any worse."

"We were hoping we could make it better," the speaker said.

She appeared quite similar to Heather from head to toe, though with a definitive Caucasian look. Her dirty blonde hair appeared to be held back at the top by a hair clip and then the rest spilling over her right shoulder. Next to her were two other girls, one with short brown hair and glasses, the other with her clurly red hair in a pair of pig tails. There was also a male in the group, a rather handsome looking lad with short black hair that was spiked up. Despite wearing their school uniforms, on a Saturday of all days, they looked and acted nothing like the usual nerds and geeks the queen bee had been encountering the last several moments.

But Heather decided to play it cautiously. "And may I ask how you can do that?" she asked.

"We've watched your show a few times before," the speaker began to reply. "And we're quite impressed with you in particular. You've made it a point to show that you held the authority over everyone else and were indeed better than all of them combined. Even when circumstances beyond your control conspired against you, you didn't falter. We like that in a person."

"I hate to be rude, but is there a point to all this?" Heather said sternly. "I would very much like to get this crap washed out of my hair and my clothes before it does some serious damage."

"We would like to invite you into our fold," the speaker said. "You're the kind of person who would fit in with us and your abilities to manipulate people to do your bidding makes you a valuable asset."

"And I should trust you, because...?" Heather asked with a raised brow.

"You've experienced what it's like going around campus on your own," the speaker said. "Side with us, and I can guarantee that they will never do so again without facing the consequences."

"How so?" Heather asked further, though she was starting to feel more intrigued with each answer given.

"No one would dare cross my brother Jeremy here," the speaker answered, nodding her head toward the male in the group. "He is the school's star quarterback. The most respected and beloved amongst the campus true blood. Any one associated with him are untouchable. Join our group, and you're one of them."

Heather was all too familiar with cliques. She was the head of one back at her last school. The more popular the members, the most powerful the group. Even if there was one member who didn't quite have the popularity as the others, they were often regarded as the most dangerous for their ability to manipulate from the shadows. A role Heather usually did herself in the past since her clique never had a weak link. In this clique, she would be considered a weak link in terms of popularity. But at the same time, she would also be regarded for her talents.

"I assume there's a reason for mentioning my abilities if there wasn't something you wanted me for," she said.

"Very good," the speaker smiled. "You catch on very well. I knew you would make a great addition to our ranks. You are needed to ensure Chelsea here makes it into the student council." She jerked her thumb to the girl in the glasses. "Our last member who was on the inside graduated, so we need a new body to ensure we are kept in the loop. Chelsea is the perfect candidate for obvious reasons. She appeals to both us and them."

Now this would be a challenge. Heather was never one to get involved with politics in any fashion. She honestly didn't care who made student council. Her previous clique was popular and powerful enough to have no need for association in such. But here, this clique needed an inside body to maintain power. She'll have to come up with some new strategies to accomplish her task.

"Alright," she said with a grin. "You got a deal." She extended her hand out for a shake and received it from the speaker.

What Heather failed to mention, though, was that there was another challenge she had to face in order to succeed. Backing Chelsea for student council meant she would clash with the one person everyone knew would do anything to ensure their place in any political position wherever they were.

Courtney.

* * *

"Duncan, will you stop it!" Courtney snapped. The blush on her face made it clear that there wasn't too much conviction behind her voice. "I'm trying to organize everything for my campaign."

"You've been organizing all day, princess," he whispered in her ear. A technique proven to cause a sensational shiver up and down her spine. "Take a break for thirty minutes. I hear it helps relax your mind." He placed another kiss on her red hot cheek.

"If I even try to take a break with you around, you'll extend it past thirty minutes," she complained. She had closed her eyes, both in an attempt to calm herself and to absorb all of the passion that was in the air. It was unlike anything she had ever felt before and it was intoxicating. Even if it was distracting her from staying on pace to achieve her goals.

"Come on, Courtney," he said. His arms around her waist from behind began to tighten his gentle embrace. "You have been trying to do everything by yourself. You really should consider getting someone to help you out."

"Like you would be of any help in politics," she retorted softly.

"Not directly," he responded. He kissed her cheek again. "What I'm trying to say is that you should hire someone on as your campaign manager. Someone to take some of the load off you and throw in some fresh ideas. Not me, of course, but someone as political-minded as you." He moved his face just enough to start smelling her hair.

"Do you know any one like that?" she gasped in pleasure. Her heart was pounding harder and just a little bit faster. She never imagined ever experiencing anything like this in her life.

"Neither of us probably like it," he whispered, lightly blowing in her ear to cause another sensational shiver. "But even I will admit that Noah fits the bill better than the rest."

"True," she exhaled. She started to breath heavier and heavier. "I heard he was class president before coming onto the show." She gently threw her arm around his head, which was well over her shoulder.

"Bring him on board and have him help you out," he said. Another kiss was placed upon her cheek. "It's not like you're going into the campaign to defend your spot on student council. You could use some fresh ideas to help you get in. What do you say?"

As she inhaled, she started shivering again from the kiss he suddenly planted upon the side of her neck. The feeling was indeed the very definition of euphoric.

Game. Set. Match. Duncan.

"Okay," she whispered. "But you know it's still the middle of the afternoon. Meaning the cameras are still rolling. And those at the mall might return any minute."

"You're the one suggesting it, sweetheart," he teased. "Not me."

"You pig!" she whimpered. She gasped when he kissed the point of her body where her neck and shoulder met. "Just don't you dare think about taking off any clothes, either yours or mine. Just in case Bridgette returns."

"As you wish, princess," he chuckled. He lightly pulled her down so that they were both lying down on her bed and continued to kiss any open skin above her shirt collar.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Has one hand on her blushing cheek, another hand fanning her face_./ "Oh, Duncan... Oh, Duncan..."

Duncan - "The day would have been so much better if I had won the challenge. Because then we would've had that romantic private dinner and then we would have our own private midnight romance. I'm sure Zeke wouldn't have minded crashing elsewhere for the night, had it been the case. Stupid nine obsession..."

Chris - "These kids should be more appreciative of the show. Look at all the hook ups that were made as a result of it! And what do we get in return? Scowls and no respect. For shame! And why the hell aren't there any more decorations in here? I'm getting sick of seeing the same stuff about with nothing new thrown into the mix."

Noah - /_Glares at Justin headshot._/ "I think I've seen enough of this." /_Puts up a Wing Commander video game poster over Justin headshot and subsequently the horse poster._/ "There! I'm sure Cody and Harold wouldn't mind this either. Should fit with their sci-fi fascination, if they haven't heard about it by now."

Cody - /_Looks at new poster_./ "Wow. This looks pretty cool. I wonder what it's from."

* * *

Heather had finished taking a shower and was making her way to the confession cam room to vent. Upon entering the living space, she noticed that virtually the entire group was about. The only ones missing were Gwen and Trent. "What's with everyone here?" she asked with a raised brow.

"We wanted to see Gwen and Trent off on their dinner date?" Bridgette replied, not doing a good job containing the giggles of excitement she had.

"Jessica said our dinner will be served here any way," Noah added, though his attention was still on the book he was reading. "So we figured we might as well wait."

Heather rolled her eyes. "Whatever," she said. "It's just a stupid dinner they're going to. Not like they're getting married."

"Oh my gosh, don't you think they'll get married in the future?" Sadie asked Katie.

"Totally!" Katie replied. "I bet their wedding will be so gorgeous!"

"Way too early to be thinking about them getting hitched, you know," Eva noted. "They're still sixteen."

"But they look so much in love," Beth cooed. "And they've managed to overcome some of the more major of obstacles back on the show, remember? I'm sure they can overcome anything."

"Unless that number nine obsession of his finally starts annoying her," Duncan muttered quietly. He received a nudge in the stomach from Courtney in response.

Moments later, the couple of the hour appeared. Everyone looked over and all but Heather stared in awe. Gwen was indeed wearing the dark purple dress with black corset. She was also wearing a pair of black gloves that were elbow length and had the fingers cut off. To the surprise of everyone but Geoff and Harold, Trent wear what many thought was an impossible suit to find. One that was in a teal color. It was dark for teal, but the color nonetheless. The black tie and white undershirt adding to his dashing appearance. They were indeed a pair made for each other.

Katie, Sadie, Lindsay, and Beth squealed at the sight. Geoff let out a big hearty cheer. Izzy and Owen, somehow managing to dress back up as an angel and Cupid respectively, rushed behind the couple. Izzy started playing the harp and the two were about to sing when Gwen glanced over her shoulder at them.

"How about you just sing, Izzy?" she asked. She had an idea that the two would do something like this and decided it would be a lost cause to try and make them stop. So she decided it would be better for the sake of everyone's hearing that she prevent just Owen from singing. "I doubt there's time for you both to do so."

Izzy and Owen shrugged. The crazy girl was then strumming the harp again. "_You'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs_," Izzy sang. Though not in the original tune, though one used from a certain movie she and Owen watched the other night while in their kick for singing romance songs. "_But I look around me and I see it isn't so, Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs, And what's wrong with that? I'd like to know, 'Cause here I go again_!"

"Imagine what it would've been like if it had been you and me going on the dinner date, princess," Duncan whispered to Courtney. He grinned when he watched her turn red at his words.

"Have fun you guys!" Bridgette called out as Gwen and Trent exited the building. Everyone in the living space watched as the couple made there way over to the cart being driven by Chef. The back was constructed so that the two would sit together and watch their surroundings pass by. The two gave everyone in the living space a wave before slowly being driven off campus.

"Well, this was the most shockingly romantic moment I had ever experienced in my life," Noah commented aloud.

"I know, right!" Lindsay squealed. She then immediately leaped into Tyler's arms. "I hope our dinner date will be as romantic as that, Tiger." Right on cue, the two began kissing passionately.

"Oh please!" Heather groaned. "It's just weird goth girl and her stupid boyfriend going to a dinner. What can be so romantic about that?" She looked over and found that a good number of people were not even close to paying any sort of attention to her.

Following Lindsay and Tyler's lead, the other official couples began making out. Bridgette and Geoff did so in a heartbeat with her straddling his waist. Duncan managed to scoop a previously reluctant Courtney into a kiss that caused her to melt seconds later. Even Harold and LeShawna started kissing in their own sweet way. Izzy leaped onto Owen's shoulder, gave him a big wet one on the lips, and started singing another romance song.

The sight of all this romance going on causing Katie, Sadie, and Beth to coo and squeal. Justin looked quite jealous that there was no attention being given to him since he had his shirt off for no real reason whatsoever. Eva grunted and crossed her arms, waiting for dinner to arrive. Ezekiel patted his growling tummy, also waiting for dinner to arrive. Cody sighed and thought longingly about ever having himself a girlfriend to kiss. Noah shrugged and went back to reading his book. DJ was completely fixed upon petting Bunny. Heather rolled her eyes in disbelief.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Wing Commander Poster over Justin Headshot over a Horse Poster)**

Heather - "Seriously, what is so special about weird goth girl and Trent as a couple? Logically, they shouldn't even be compatible as one. I don't even see how he couple possible be attracted to her. It makes me sick!"

Cody - /_Sighs_./ "Seeing all that loving going on around me... I may have all these female fans, but I still don't have a girlfriend." /_Sighs again_./ "Oh, if only..."

Eva - /_Scoffs_./ "Romance is not my thing. Probably never will. So I ain't gonna concern myself over it."

Katie and Sadie - Sadie - "That would have been, like, so the time to go up to him again!"  
Katie - /_Blushing_./ "But I already talked to him."  
Sadie - "The mood would have made you two really hit it off for sure!"  
Katie - "He just... seemed really busy, though.'  
Sadie - "How else is he going to pay attention to you if you don't guide it."  
Katie - /_Sighs_./ "Next time. I promise."

Justin - "That was embarrassing! I had my shirt off, I had the right poses going. And no one even noticed I was there. Did something happen to my body that I'm not aware of?" /_Suddenly notices that his headshot has been covered_./ "Nooooo!"

Noah - /_Laughs triumphantly_./ "When I heard his cry, it was beautiful. Take that, Anti-Me!"

Izzy and Owen - Izzy - /_Still dressed as an angel and still playing the harp_./  
Owen - /_Still dressed as Cupid and still singing off key_./  
Together - "Come what may, come what may, I will love you until my dying day." /_Owen burps and Izzy giggles_./

Chris - "Who would've thought that Gwen and Trent's love would inspire others to suck face immediately." /_Chuckles_./ "Great TV, people. Always thinking about the ratings. Our female demographic have surely spiked because of it. Any way, it was boring for the rest of the day by the time Gwen and Trent came back. And they managed to have a little lovey dovey moment shortly before the cameras went out for the night. I think to really hit it home for all you girls out there, we'll show it to you."

* * *

Trent carried Gwen in his arms as he made his way over to her room. Giggling softly, she took out her key to unlock the door. Once it was open, Trent stepped in and closed it quietly. He then laid his girlfriend on her bed and slipped in to join her. He moved his arms around so as to wrap around her waist while she wrapped her arms over his neck.

"_Oh, but you're lovely with your smile so warm_," Trent began to gently sing, causing her to giggle in delight. "_And your cheeks so soft_." He placed a kiss on her cheek. "_There is nothing for me but to love you, Just the way you look tonight_."

"_With each word your tenderness grows_," Gwen started to sing along. "_Tearing my fear apart, And that laugh that wrinkles your nose, Touches my foolish heart_."

"_Lovely, never ever change_," they sang together. "_Keep that breathless charm, Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you, Just the way you look tonight..._" They leaned in to kiss ever so lovingly.

"That was a wonderful night," Gwen giggled afterward.

"It sure was," Trent whispered back. He then let out a gentle sigh and snuggled up to her. "Too tired to get up."

"Too tired to get out of this dress," she added. She snuggled in closer to him. "Let's just sleep like this tonight."

"Wouldn't want it any other way," he said. They both gently tightened their embrace and allowed their bodies to simply release all their weight onto the bed. "Can't wait have another night like that."

"Doubt we will if it's coming from our pockets," she noted. "I can only imagine how much it would cost for the singer. He was really good, too. Chris wasn't kidding when he said they went all out on this one."

"Shocking to think he did something nice for us, huh?" he asked.

"A sign of the apocalypse, most definitely," she replied with a giggle. She exhaled a loving sigh. "So much fun tonight... But never been so tired before..."

"Me too..." he whispered. He managed to lean his head in to place another kiss on her lips. "When was the last time I got to say, 'I love you' to you?"

"Last night, remember?" she giggled quietly. "Not long after you won the challenge."

"Mind if I say it again?" he asked with a chuckle.

"Only if I get to say it first," she replied. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said. They kissed once more before sleep began to overtake them as they closed their eyes. And yet they still managed to form smiles on their faces. "Night, beautiful."

"Night, handsome," she whispered back.

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard

* * *

Got bit with the romance bug and boy did I get bit pretty bad. You should've seen me going through so many love songs that I could think of at the top of my head and then looking up the different singers that would fit the mood. Fortunately, I happen to like **Moulin Rouge!** and got assistance from there. I may be a guy, but I appreciate good art when I see it and that movie was quite the work of art.

**Spoiler Alert!** Forgot about it last chapter, but there's something I wanted to throw out there. Word is that in other countries, the ending to Total Drama Island is quite different. How different? Gwen wins. There's a clip that's been posted up on YouTube of apparently the Norwegian version that proves it. Some people question the validity, others believe its real. Looks real enough to me. Look up "_Gwen is winner on total drama island_" to see for yourself.

---

**Next Up:** Eva meets her match.


	7. Week 2, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Seven

---

**(Week 2, Day 2 - Sunday)**

Trent was the first to awaken. Upon opening his eyes, he beheld a sight he decided right then and there he wanted to wake up to every morning for the rest of his life. With a smile on his face, he gently brought his hand over to brush the teal streaks on the dark hair of the pale skinned beauty snuggled up to him.

Moments later, Gwen opened her eyes. She smiled upon seeing the handsome face before her. Sensing that he was brushing her hair, she teased being shy in burying half her face in her pillow while still fixing her eyes at him. They both let out very light, barely audible sighs of gentle laughter.

"Morning, beautiful," he said in his sleepy tone.

"Morning, handsome," she said back in her own sleepy tone.

"I had a dream last night," he said.

"Oh?" she teased in a giggle. "What about?"

"You, me," he began to answer. "Doing our own little duet to the songs played at our dinner. In each other's arms."

"Sounds like a nice dream," she said with a smile.

"It sure was," he responded. They both exhaled softly and brought their foreheads together ever so gently. They stared into one another's eyes for what seemed like an eternity. "I've never felt so blessed than to have you."

Gwen let out a light giggle. "Not many guys would be so embracing to the concept of romance," she noted.

"Blame my parents," Trent responded with a light chuckle. "Whenever mom took me to the movies, we'd watch chick flicks instead of the action films dad didn't mind letting me watch. It wasn't pleasant at first. Didn't help that a lot of the movies were pretty bad. Mom wanted me to have better appreciation, so dad gave me the advice of watching older movies. That's when I realized 'Princess Bride' was a romance film disguised as a swashbuckling adventure. I started watching other movies like 'Casablanca' and 'City Lights'. 'Singin' in the Rain' was what did it for me. With that one movie, I was bit with the love bug."

"What a surprise," she giggled. "A musical making a music man fall in love."

"Seems perfectly obvious, huh," he chuckled. "That was a few years ago. In the time since then, it was one of three things that had ever been on my mind next to motorcycles and music. Listening to all kinds of romance songs to get the right tune to play, coming up with the words to sing or say." He brought the hand he had been brushing her hair with down to cup her cheek. "Then I met you. Ever since I laid eyes on you, all the feelings I've been waiting for emerged inside me."

"I'm sure your friends thought you had lost your mind falling for a goth girl at first sight," Gwen commented.

"Just about all of them did," Trent noted. "But looks didn't really matter to me. I just had this gut instinct that this girl was a wonderful person. Someone who was real and true to herself. In my eyes, you were the girl I had been looking for."

"Trent," she teased whining. "You're making me feel all girly."

"And you're making me feel all mushy," he said. "But I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Me neither," she responded. She leaned in to give him a loving kiss on the lips. "I have to say that the first time I saw you, I did feel same for you as you did me. You weren't pretending to be friendly or understanding. That's who you were and still are through and through. Honest and caring. That's what really attracted me the most about you."

No more words were spoken. There didn't need to be any more. Their eyes did all the speaking for them. In seconds their lips came together in an ever gentle kiss as they snuggled up to one another for a loving embrace. They didn't care that they were continuing the wrinkle the fancy clothes they had been wearing since their dinner date.

They were so lost in their love for each other, nothing else really seemed to matter.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "I know you guys like all the lovey dovey going on with those two. Hell, we get some good ratings from it so I have no real problem with it. But this show is called 'Total Drama' for a reason. Let's get some drama rolling here, shall we?"

* * *

"This is how the election works at Richmore," Chelsea said to Heather as she began laying down various papers, folders, and packets on the table in the cafeteria. "There are four main offices and eight student council representatives. Each class gets one office and two representatives. Senior class is President, junior class is Vice President, sophomore class is Secretary, and freshman class is Treasury. With me so far?"

"Yes," Heather nodded. "You obviously want me to get you into being Vice President."

"Getting into office is actually a lot tricker," Chelsea noted. "The school officials are the ones who can vote for who goes into office. After that, the students elect their representatives. Your job is to get me into student council, so it doesn't really matter if I'm Vice President or a representative just as long as I get in. Alright?"

"Got it," Heather replied.

"That still doesn't mean the focus of my campaign shouldn't be my becoming Vice President," Chelsea explained. "Running just to be a representative makes you look like you're not really serious about being in politics. I'm dead serious with my political ambitions. But I do know were the tides turn and what likelihood I have of placing a position I want."

"Understood," Heather nodded.

"Good," Chelsea said. "Now then, here's how the schedule goes. A week from Monday is when everyone wanting to run for council begins to campaign. There's two weeks of solid campaigning before the third Sunday. School officials interview each candidate for each position. Those who are called in early for interview are generally the favorites not only in the election, but also whom the officials appear to like best for the position."

"So in the first two weeks of campaigning, I need to make you look favorable so that you are among the first interviewed by the school officials," Heather summarized.

"Correct," Chelsea responded. "Campaigning continues for another week, though this time it becomes clearer who the frontrunners are following the interviews. By this point, the weakest candidates drop out. On the fourth Sunday, each class run debates in one of four randomly selected hall amphitheaters. This is more to appease for votes into student council."

"Do the selection of the amphitheater play a role in swaying votes?" Heather asked.

"Not necessarily," Chelsea answered. "It's the students we should be concerned with most. After the debates, there's one more day of campaigning before the elections on Tuesday. Students have all day to vote. Halfway through the day, the school officials will announce who they voted into office. This is so that the students can switch their votes for who they then want in student council since their original pick is already in office. Voting closes at 9pm and the next day is when the results are posted."

"Any problems in tampering with the votes?" Heather asked.

"Don't even try," Chelsea replied. "The votes are under lock and key with so many security measures an ant could get caught. Each vote is calculated into the computer system, which is monitored with all kinds of anti-hacking programs. The votes are also recorded on camera, the tapes behind guarded by the officials themselves. Any attempt to tamper with the votes is automatic expulsion for those responsible and for the candidate they were favoring. And that is a risk we cannot afford to take since it means taking everyone down."

"Tampering with the votes is out of the question, got it," Heather nodded in a bit of disappointment.

"Just concentrate on manipulating the students," Chelsea stated. "That's all we want from you in accomplishing your objective. How you go about doing the manipulating we really don't care. Get me elected and we'll reward you beautifully."

"Consider your place on the student council secured," Heather said with a grin.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "I guess I won't be clashing with Courtney as much as I thought. Three viable positions in the council. This means every candidate as three chances to get in. Chelsea will be a lock for one, I'll make sure of it. So that means Courtney can get one of the other two. Just as long as she doesn't go up against two stronger candidates. ... But just to be on the safe side..."

* * *

"There's our favorite know-it-all," Duncan announced as he leaned up against the living space couch, right behind here Noah was sitting. "You're just the man princess and I have been looking for."

Noah sighed as he looked up from his book and turned just enough to catch sight of the delinquent. "What do you want?"

"It's me who wants to speak with you, Noah," Courtney spoke. "Not Duncan." Noah looked over to see the overachiever sit herself on the couch in a spot next to him. "But he is right when he said that your the person we've been looking for."

"Oh, joy," Noah said sarcastically. "Fortune vomits on my eiderdown once more."

"I'm going to ignore that ridicules display of cynical behavior," Courtney said, slightly biting the inside of her mouth to keep from reacting more violently. "Because I have a proposition for you."

"You want me to help you get elected into student council, don't you," Noah summarized with a raised brow.

Courtney sat quietly in disbelief for a second. Then she remembered what kind of person she was talking to and managed to take a deep breath to regain her composure. "I want you to be my campaign manager," she said.

"I think I'll pass," Noah said, returning his attention to his book.

"What do you mean you'll pass?" Duncan asked. "You thinking of running for a spot in student council yourself or something?"

"Not really," the know-it-all replied. "I'm afraid my ambitions stretch slightly further than professional idiocy in West Kitchener."

"The hell that's supposed to mean?" Duncan questioned with a confused brow raised.

"It means no longer possesses an interest in politics," Courtney answered her boyfriend with a sigh.

"Glad to see your relationship is healthy enough for you to willingly translate the English language for your lap dog," Noah commented. In a flash, the book in his hands was violently swatted to the ground. He slowly turned to guilty figure and gave her a cold glare. One that was returned equally. "I assume there's a good reason for that."

"It's to warn you that you're definitely getting on my nerves," Courtney said. "I came to you in an act of kindness and all you've done in return is be nothing more than a stuck up twit. Proceed any further with such an attitude and you'll be begging that you were feeling Duncan's wrath as opposed to mine."

Noah sighed, knowing the statement to be true. "Fine," he said, crossing his arms. "I'll entertain your proposition further. After which, I will return to my previous state of being left alone for no other reason than to be exactly that."

"Whatever," Courtney responded before clearing her voice. "So you are not interested in running for student council. Alright. I am. Though it is not something I quite used to, I need some help with my campaign. Help from someone who knows the game and be able to play from the sidelines. I like to run the ship all myself in the past, but I believe coming into a new school puts me at a bit of a disadvantage despite having had by image exposed nationally on television. There's a lot I need to do if I have any chance at getting in and, as much as I hate to admit it, the load is too much for me to handle alone. Since you claimed to have been Student President at your school before coming onto the show, you're the best person for me to call on for help."

Noah remained silent for a moment before slowly leaning down to pick up his book. "So you're swallowing your pride and asking me to be your campaign manager because you would otherwise be overwhelmed in this unknown arena in which you find yourself," he said. "What's in it for me?"

Courtney took a deep breath. "If I'm elected, you'll be my Chief of Staff," she answered.

"What?" Duncan practically cried.

"Which will certain come in handy if by luck the school officials elect me to be Vice President," Courtney added, ignoring her boyfriend's surprise. "And... you will have important say on whatever issues we deal with."

The only movement Noah made throughout the whole revelation was to simply blink once. He stared at Courtney in a very nonchalant way. Then he spoke. "You have your word that I'm not a personal monkey, but rather a key voice of reason to make sure whatever campaign pledges you make are achieved?" he asked.

Courtney nodded. "Yes," she replied.

Duncan was in a state of shock. He never figured Courtney to be the kind to relinquish a great deal of control unless it was in a completely desperate situation. He didn't think this was desperate enough for her to offer Noah to be her Chief of Staff.

Noah stared at Courtney somemore before turning his gaze back to his book. "Pathetic," he said. "Absolutely pathetic. Contemptible. ... Worth a try."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "So Katie asks me to help with her studies. Then Courtney comes to me to be her campaign manager and then her Chief of Staff if she gets elected. My talents are being recognized at last."

Courtney - "I had a long, hard thought about the decision I made to offer him the Chief of Staff position. There really wasn't much else I could give him in return for being my campaign manager. I really didn't want to do it, but I knew that I would certainly be having a difficult time being able to run everything by myself. Besides... he would be the one person who could suggest something to be done with discretion and not have it trail back to me. Like having Duncan dirty his hands for me."

Duncan - "When I suggested Noah be considered as campaign manager, I didn't expect her to offer him a spot at being literally her right hand man. Is she really that concerned about the people she's going up against?"

* * *

**(Week 2, Day 3 - Monday)**

**(The Others)**

"... from fourteen years ago, when ozone depletion was just at ten percent of its current level," the science professor spoke. He pressed the button on the mouse, causing the image projected on the screen to change. "By the time you are thirty years old, average global temperature will have risen two and a half degrees."

Tyler sighed blissfully as his attention was fixated on Lindsay, who was playing with her hair in front of her face. He found her to be really cute when she did that. Duncan and DJ had their heads propped up on the desk with their hands, looking as though they were learning when in fact they were bored.

Sadie was quite passing notes to Katie on how to best approach the latter's crush. Katie kept blushing and writing replies of how she wasn't ready yet. Eventually, Eva got annoyed watching them and snatched one of the notes. But instead of reading it, she simply ate it. This certainly intimidated the BFFFLs to find something else to do.

Justin had managed to strategically place a mirror on his desk in such a way that it wouldn't be noticeable. More time for him to admire his handsome looks instead of being bored to death by school. Owen was staring with his mouth open, unable to comprehend most of what was being taught. Heather was filing her nails and avoiding LeShawna's cold glances, as if trying to tell the queen bee to at least act interested or suffer the consequences.

The only three students who were actually paying full attention and taking notes were Bridgette, Geoff, and Trent. Being a motorcycle enthusiast, Trent would always learn information when it came to global warming so that he could retune his bike to make it more eco-friendly. Bridgette was a natural in the subject and took notes simply to compare with what she already knew. Geoff studied simply to look good for his girlfriend.

"The results causing such catastrophic consequences as typhoons, floods, widespread drought, and famine," the science professor continued. "Any one care to explain what famine is exactly?"

* * *

**(Week 2, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

"Receive any hugs from girls today, Zeke?" Izzy asked rather cheerfully.

"Um... no..." Ezekiel nervously said, shaking his head.

"No?" Izzy whined. "But it's almost lunch time. We'll be behind on the quota."

"I'll give him a hug," Beth offered with a giggle and a snort. She then gently wrapped her arms around the prairie boy and gave him a comfortable hug. "There. Your first hug of the day."

"Uh, thanks," Ezekiel said, scratching the back of his head. He smiled a little, thankful that he received a relatively less embarrassing hug. At least compared to ones Izzy gives him.

"Woo hoo!" Izzy cheered. "We're back on track!"

"If you were so concerned about ensuring he gets hugged three times a day by a girl as you've pledged, why don't you give him the hugs all by yourself?" Cody asked curiously. Ezekiel considered pulling his toque down over his eyes upon hearing this.

"Izzy wants Zeke to be shared amongst other girls too," Izzy replied with a cackle.

"It's best not to dwell on that which is Izzy," Gwen noted to a confused looking Harold.

"Oh, okay," Harold nodded. "I guess we'll never know why she is the way she is, huh."

"Years from now, people will be talking about her the same way they talk about Ogopogo, Windigo, and the Trapper's Ghost," Noah commented in his cynical manner.

Izzy heard this and yet giggled with delight. "I once met the Trapper's Ghost, uh huh," she said. "He had the cutest Huskies! It was really cool, he was looking for this one guy who got lost in the forest. I wasn't lost, I was just playing a funny little game with my cousin. Any way, so I decided to help him look for this guy..."

As Izzy continued to talk, Ezekiel sighed as looked down at the ground his was walking on. They had left a lecture and were taking their time heading toward the next class on their schedule. His body language did not go unnoticed.

"Feeling alright there, Zeke?" Gwen asked the prairie boy.

"I dunno, eh," he replied after a sigh. "That lecture just... conf'oosed me a little. I never really th'oot ab'oot havin' to find a job, eh. My mom said I'd be w'ootever I wanted to be and dad said that if thin's didn't work out I c'ood always work on the farm."

"What that lecture was about is letting you know how there's no guarantee getting the job you want," Courtney tried to explain. "Think of it this way. You're not the only one trying to get the job you want. Therefore, you got to show the people who decide who gets the job that you're better than the other person. Having good grades help a great deal."

"It helps, but there are other factors as well," Gwen noted. "References also help. Having a reliable person have your back gives the impression that you yourself are reliable. But most importantly, its the ability to do what you're trying to do and to be able to do it well that works best."

"But even then, there's no guarantee you'll get to do what you want to do," Harold added. "It's like, you may one day be want to be a scientist. But then you'll end up being an engineer. And sometimes what job you get will effect your living conditions. Like you'll want to live in a mansion, yet you'll end up living in a condo."

"And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack," Izzy added in rather suddenly. "And you may find yourself in another part of the world. And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile. And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife. And you may ask yourself, 'Well... How did I get here?'"

Everyone came to a stop. Izzy just stood still, smiling in an unassuming manner. The other seven just stared at her, each with different forms of expression on their faces.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - "N'oo I'm really conf'oosed, eh! Shotg'oon shack, an'oother part of the world, large automobile, b'ootiful house, b'ootiful wife. What does that all mean?"

Beth - "I'm hoping that by being her roommate and now being her classmate that I might get to understand Izzy a little better. So far, I'm still not getting a lot of the things she says."

Noah - "As smart as I am, even I don't know what Izzy was talking about."

Izzy - /_Shakes her head._/ "Same as it ever was..."

* * *

**(Week 2, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

**(The Others)**

"Any one wanting a shot at making the school wrestling team, please report to the mat in the center of the gym," the wrestling coach announced after the final hour of classes ended. "If you want to simply watch, sit your butts over in the bleachers. Everyone else, hit the shows and move long."

"This outta be a fun show," Duncan chuckled while stretching his arms out. "You guys wanna watch."

"I'm game," Geoff said.

"Got nothing else planned," DJ shrugged.

"What, you're not gonna try out for the team?" Duncan asked as the trio made their way to the bleachers.

"Dude is as tame as Bunny, remember," Geoff joked.

"I would actually be surprised if any one from the show actually would try out for the team, though," DJ said, taking the verbal jab in stride as the trio took their seats. "Those guys are really tough."

"You can say that again," Duncan nodded. "My back is still going to feel sore tomorrow morning."

"Sh'yeah, bra," Geoff agreed. "My arms have never been so stiff."

"And that was from the guys whose bodies aren't ripped," DJ pointed out. "Never thought a kid skinnier than Noah could throw me as if I were a feather, man."

"This place is surprising me more and more," Duncan sighed. "I get my butt handed to me by a kid geekier than Harold with relative ease. Starting to make me think twice about the people I pick on."

"Really?" DJ asked curiously.

"Nope," Duncan grinned. "I just have to be cautious now of which battles to fight."

"Speaking of which battles to fight cautiously," Geoff said. "I think things are about to get interesting."

"Oh man," Duncan said. "This is definitely not going to be good."

"Do you think they'll actually let her compete?" DJ asked.

"If they value their lives, they will," Duncan replied.

"So, you think you got what it takes to be on the wrestling team, eh?" the wrestling coach asked Eva with a raised brow.

"You let a bunch of skinny twerps on the team," Eva argued. "Why not let a girl have a shot?"

"Bold, yet true words you speak there," the coach said with a nod. "Ah'right, let's see how you do. And to be fair, I'll run you through the same way I run through everyone else. Beat three of the boys on the junior squad in five minutes and you're in. When I say beat 'em, I mean beat 'em. Just because you last five minutes don't mean you beat 'em. That work for you?"

"Fine by me," Eva said, cracking her neck to one side.

"Good girl," the coach said. Then he blew his whistle. "Ah'right! Andrews! You're first against the new girl!"

"Now this'll be fun," Duncan chuckled as he leaned closer for a better view of the action. "I got five that says Eva will wipe the floor with all three they throw at her."

"I'll take some of that," DJ said with a grin.

"You're on, bra," Geoff responded.

The trio watched as Eva took her position against the first opponent. Andrews had a fairly normal look to his body. No real definition or build. But as the boys learned earlier, looks were deceiving. They were about to see if Eva would learn that herself.

The coach blew the whistle and the two wrestlers locked up. Those who were watching began cheering. The majority were rooting for Andrews while there were quite a number cheering for Eva. Andrews tried to slide behind Eva, but she caught him and immediately went to take him down. With a grunt, she began to exert all force to pin his shoulders to the mat while he attempted to lock his legs around one of her arms. She managed to finally push all her weight onto him, resulting in the coach slapping the mat and blowing his whistle to end the match.

"One minute and thirty-nine seconds," the coach announced. "Not bad, girl. Better luck next time, Andrews." Eva was on her knees, taking deep breaths, while Andrews returned to the junior squad and received reassuring pats on the back. "Matthews, you're up next. Go get 'em!"

"I believe that constituted as wiping the floor, boys," Duncan said with a snicker to DJ and Geoff while Matthews jogged up to his position on the mat. "She managed to get the pin in under two minutes."

"He was grounded for the most part, I give you that," Geoff nodded.

"We'll see how she does with this one," DJ noted.

Matthews certainly looked more muscular and toned. He looked straight into Eva's eyes with determination while she returned with fire and intensity. The whistle blew and Matthews immediately dropped to his knees in an attempt to toss her over. She instead dropped her weight onto his nearest shoulder and then pushed him down onto his back.

"Oh, this'll be over quick!" Duncan cheered.

Matthews immediately went into a bridge position to keep his shoulders from dropping to the mat. Eva growled as she began forcing her entire body onto his upper body to try and force it down. Matthews would move his legs inch by inch to either one side of the other, looking to see if he could pull something off. He head could maintain the weight of the position for so long and it didn't help that Eva's weight was being added to the pressure.

Matthews finally swooped his legs in the direction away from Eva. But she seemed prepared for this as she immediately locked her right arm around his head just as he was successfully turning his body so that his stomach would be on the mat. She spread her legs outward and planted her feet firmly upon the mat to ensure he couldn't move her.

"She's got two minutes left, dude," Geoff commented.

As though she happened to hear him, Eva moved her right leg inward and slammed Matthews' head onto the mat. She shifted herself so that she used all of her weight and force to push him over and pin his shoulders down. Upon hearing a slap on the mat and the blowing of a whistle, she knew she had succeeded.

"Works for me as her wipe the floor with him," DJ noted.

"Get ready to pucker up boys," Duncan said confidently. "I'll be ten bucks richer and she'll be on the school wrestling team."

"Three minutes and seventeen seconds," the coach announced. "You're ah'most there, girl. Tough break, Matthews." Eva was back on her knees, her deep breaths being done a little faster than before. Matthews snapped his fingers in disappointment as he rejoined the rest of the junior squad. "Guess the last one will be--"

"Mind if I challenge her, coach?" said a voice. The source of the voice came from where the varsity squad sat. One of the skinniest and virtually plain looking bodies in the group had his hand raised.

"You sure about it, Jackson?" the coach asked with a raised brow.

"Worth a shot, sir," the boy replied.

The coach stared at him for a moment then looked over at Eva. Finally, he shrugged. "Ah'right, if that's what you want, Jackson," he said. "You're her final test."

As Jackson jogged up to position, the trio noticed there was a lot of murmuring going on within the gym. There was anticipation in the air. Obviously there was something to this Jackson fellow or else they wouldn't have been making such a big deal about the whole situation. The trio were now watching with greater interest.

The whistle blew. In the blink of an eye, Jackson locked hands with Eva, dropped onto his left knee, and positioned his right shoulder into her stomach. Eva grunted and tried to pull and push him away and onto the ground. Only she found herself losing balance whenever she did so and returned to a stationary position quickly. She found herself quite in a predicament as she settled on trying to push him forward at the moment.

Jackson then suddenly slid his legs around from the left and wrapped them around both of Eva's ankles, causing her to trip over. As she went down, he immediately floated over and hooked her in a front headlock, spreading his legs out and planting his feet so as to keep her grounded in position.

"Dude, he did that in less than a minute," Geoff commented.

"He took her down as if she was nothing," DJ added.

"This doesn't look good," Duncan noted.

Eva was growling viciously as she looked for a way to get out of the hold. Jackson remained relatively calm, as if waiting for her to do something before making his next move. She hooked her hands over his arms and began to pull. He immediately flew over behind her and rotated his body. He maintained his lock on her head, but now he was doing it from behind. As if to maintain added pressure, his legs were position around her left arm. She dropped the arm carelessly and he locked his legs around it. He turned his body just enough and caused Eva to fall back. Placing all force on her right arm was all that kept her from getting her shoulders pinned to the mat.

"Definitely not good," Duncan groaned. "I'm gonna lose ten bucks!"

"It's only been two minutes and the bra is just dominating her," Geoff said in awe.

"Who would've thought that a guy as skinny as a stick could out wrestle Eva," DJ noted with a slight chuckle.

Eva let out a heavy growl as she moved about her legs. She managed to plant them on the mat, allowing her to be able to gain some ground. With a roar, she lifted herself and all of Jackson up. She had Jackson on her shoulders as she went to stand straight up. Yet just as she did so successfully, Jackson moved his arms over from her head to her right arm while his legs remained locked on her left arm. Jackson then suddenly rolled over, using Eva's momentum to cause her to flip backward off her feet. Eva found herself slamming hard on her stomach as Jackson floated back over to lock her head from the front.

"Where did this kid come from?" Duncan asked.

"Guess he's varsity for a reason," DJ noted, shrugging at the question as well.

Eva grunted and struggled with great frustration. She couldn't remember the last time she had found herself in such a precarious position before. It baffled her that someone with the body shape as this Jackson kid was besting her. This match should have been over a long time ago, and yet she was not running out of time. She needed to do something now.

Eva planted her feet into the mat as well as her hands. With all her might, she pushed off forward and roared as she looked to hoist her opponent over her shoulders. Jackson apparently anticipated this, however, as he flipped around to land on his feet. He then swiftly locked his arms around her waist and pulled back. He went into a bridge position while Eva found herself having been carried over and her shoulders landing on the mat. The shock of having been lifted off her feet was more than enough of a distraction for her to forget that she was being pinned. It wasn't until she heard a slap on the mat followed by the blowing of the whistle that she realized this. She had been beaten.

"Holy cow!" Geoff cried.

"Impossible!" Duncan shouted in disbelief.

"Unbelievable!" DJ yelled.

"Four minutes and two seconds," the coach announced. "Ah'ways have to be the showman, eh Jackson? Sorry girl, but you're not making the team this year. Try again next year if you would like. Next!"

Eva walked off the mat and then just stood still. Stunned and in a great deal of disbelief. She could not believe what had just happened moments ago. She had prided herself in being a tough, strong woman whom no person of any gender could overpower. Yet the skinniest, plainest looking guy in the room had managed to lift her off her feet and pin her in a wrestling match. For the first time in her life, she didn't know what to do.

"Hey there," called a voice at her. She turned to see it was Jackson, the very person who defeated her. He was wiping his face with a towel and offering her an unopened water bottle. "Good effort out there."

Eva was a bit hesitant to even acknowledge his gesture of sportsmanship. In the end, she nodded and slowly took the water bottle. She was a little parched after all.

"Mind if I offer a couple suggestions if you wanna try again next year?" he asked. Eva was once more bewildered by this expression of kindness to her. So she just shrugged. "You have great strength, no question about it. But strength alone is not going to win you the tough matches. Sometimes it's the lack of strength that will work. If you're gonna try again for next time, work on your speed. It's very helpful in using someone's momentum against them."

Eva nodded. That was exactly what he was doing against her. The whole time she was trying to overpower him with her strength, only to find herself being taken over because he was using her momentum against her. She never really took speed into account whenever she was in a physical competition unless she wanted to beat any of her personal best times.

"Other thing," Jackson continued. "I bet you hear this a lot and I apologize if it bothers you. Temper. Wrestling is not a sport you wanna lose your temper in. It takes away your focus and you end up leaving one too many openings for the opponent to easily take you down. Just take your time on the mat, don't rush things, and keep a level head. That's all you need to do."

Eva nodded again. She knew full well that her temper can and usually did get the best of her if something wasn't going the way she wanted. Most especially whenever she was in some sort of competition, physical or not. She always entered with the mindset that she was the best and no one could touch her. Not winning was not an option.

"Jackson!" called out another voice. They looked over. Standing at one of the entrance doors, a grin painted across her face, was Jessica. Eva's Resident Assistance.

Jackson chuckled and turned back to Eva. "If you really want to be on the team, give some thought to what I said, okay?" he said to her. He started backing away a little and threw her a smile before turning and jogging over to Jessica. Eva simply nodded, but now her attention wasn't so much on her abilities. She had very good hearing. Might as well use it.

"Hey, isn't that Jessica?" DJ asked as the trio were getting ready to leave.

"Yeah, dude," Geoff confirmed after squinting his eyes to get clarity. "You think she and Jackson are a couple?"

"Our R.A. got herself a jock boyfriend, eh," Duncan grinned. "This I gotta see."

"Howdy, Jess," Eva managed to hear Jackson say.

"Beating up on my students, huh?" she heard Jessica tease with her arms crossed.

"She's got potential, sweetie," Jackson chuckled. "You've heard me mention a number of times in the past few months how the team needed a strong body. She just needs work on the actual wrestling."

"If that were the case, honey, than shouldn't you be trying to convince your hard-ass coach to consider making an exception for her?" Jessica asked with a smirk.

"It crossed my mind," he answered. "I just need to know if she really wants to be on the team."

"She has a name, you know," Jessica noted.

"My bad," Jackson chuckled. "What's her name?"

"Eva," she replied. "If you want, I can ask her later on in the week. Seeing as how you're busy and all with the rest of the boys."

"Jackson!" the coach called out. "Flirt later! Back on the mat!"

"Speaking of which," Jackson said. "Catch you Saturday?"

"Fine with me," Jessica nodded. She smiled when he gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before heading back on the mat. Jessica looked around and noticed that there were some of her students watching. She didn't blush. Instead, her lips curled into a wide grin before gently walking out of the gym.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - /_Smirking._/ "Yeah, I have a boyfriend. Is it really that surprising that someone would be in a relationship with me?"

Duncan - /_Scoffs._/ "That guy cost me ten bucks. Just because he's Jessica's man doesn't mean I'm gonna dislike him any less."

Geoff - "That's pretty gnarly Jessica has a boyfriend, dude. He seems like a pretty stand up guy. But what impresses me the most about him is that he beat Eva in a physical sport. Who would've saw that coming?"

Eva - /_Sighs._/ "I lost. ... A guy skinnier than potato skin lifted me off the ground and pinned my shoulders. ... I should be embarrassed. ... But I'm not. ... You know why? ... Because he just lit a fire in me. ... He beat me. I accept that. ... But now, I'm more determined than ever to beat him back. ... You better be ready, Jackson." /_Cracks her knuckles._/

DJ - "You think some of the romance coming off of Gwen and Trent from Saturday still hanging in the air?"

Chris - "I guess I can reward you people for sticking through the drama. So here's a little romance for being such good sports. ... But it's not of Gwen and Trent..."

* * *

**(Week 2, Day 6 - Thursday)**

Lindsay never really disliked her school uniform too much. She just did not like how it didn't expose enough of her belly. Unless the shirt was lifted up just a little bit. Something Tyler did not mind doing as the two teens, fully clothed in their school uniforms, were laying down on his bed. The excuse he gave Trent to leave the room for a moment was that they would be studying. In a small way, he was actually telling the truth.

They just were not studying school work.

"This muscle is called the obliguus externus," Tyler said, placing his finger ever so softly upon the muscle. A loving smile was painted upon on his face.

No matter how gently he was touching, the feeling was quite ticklish for Lindsay. She giggled and squealed anytime his finger started upon her skin. Her shoulders hunched up. Her hands just barely touching her face and nearly covering her mouth. Her knees clenched together as they swayed from side to side every now and then. She was giggling and squeal so hard that it seemed any second tears would start to form in her eyes.

Tyler slowly ran his finger onto the next muscle on her abdomen. Her fits of pleasure continuing as he did so. "And right here is where the obliquus internus is," he said.

Lindsay gently bit one her fingers in a failed attempt to stop giggling. She did this so that she could spend a moment to look over at her boyfriend with her beautiful blue eyes and throw an innocent, shy smile his way. A sign to show that she liked what he was doing. Tyler's loving smile grew just a little wider, seeing that he was making her happy.

He ran his finger to the next muscle. Her giggling and squeal continued in the process. "The muscle over here is called tansversus abdominis," he explained.

Tyler waited a moment, listening to her as she continued her sounds of pleasure, before slowly and gently laying his entire hand onto her belly. Now she was really giggling and squeal. The sensation of his touch actually causing her to shiver a little as the volume of her voice went up a little. He softly rubbed his hand over a particular area of her belly, driving her wild with joy.

"All the muscles here are known as rectus abdominis," he said.

He then lifted his hand just enough so that it was barely hovering over her body. The tips of his fingers still touching the surface of her skin. He then lightly moved them down. Her giggling started to get softer. And her cheeks began to blush hot pink. His fingers came to a stop in an area that was underneath the top of her skirt. Had he dared to go just another inch further, he would have been feeling the silk of her panties.

"And finally, we have the pyramidalis muscle," he said gently. After a moment, he slowly pulled his hand back over her stomach and gently placed it upon her skin. "Those are the abdominal muscles."

Lindsay let out another soft giggle while maintaining the blush on her cheeks. "You're so smart, Tiger," she said. Seconds later, she had her arms around his neck and kissing him passionately. His hand that was on her abdomen was now placed upon the small of her back. They continued to make out for a moment until she pulled back and pouted. "I didn't get your name right, did I?"

"That's okay," he assured her. "Besides, I really like being called that."

Lindsay giggled. "It's, like, giving you a pet name," she said. "But that means I need a pet name. It would so be no fair if you got a pet name, but not me."

"Then let's came up with one for me to call you," Tyler responded. "Hmmm... things that start with the letter 'L'..."

"There's 'Lion'," she suggested. "Goes great with me calling you 'Tiger'. But it doesn't rhyme with my name."

"Let's hold on to it just in case we can't come up with something better," he said. "And for you, it would actually be 'Lioness'."

She giggled again. "Um..." she started to think. Normally, that wouldn't be a good thing. But for this particular puzzle, she wanted to try really hard. "Oh, I know. How about 'Lemon'? That almost rhymes."

"Not only that, it goes along with your beautiful blonde hair," Tyler teased.

"You big silly Tiger," she giggled.

"My little sweet Lemon," he said.

It was the perfect match. Sealed with a gentle, loving kiss.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Grinning, does a feline pawing motion._/ "Rawr... Way to go, Tyler."

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard

* * *

Sorry for not including any new decorations at the moment. I kind of drew a blank for new ones at this time so I'm open to any suggestions. Hopefully it'll help. Even though I made it seem like the Eva scene would be the primary focus for the chapter, I actually started thinking more and more about the Tyler and Lindsay scene. I guess it's because there just seemed to be so very little stories of them and I think they make a nice couple. So I wanted to give them a little spotlight time, even though I somewhat a storyline for them coming up in the future.

No "Weird Al" reference today, but there's one particular reference in there that's based off my new obsession. The one who figures it out first gets a cookie. So send in those reviews, people!

---

**Next Up:** Friday Night SmackDown!


	8. Week 2, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Eight

---

**(Week 2, Day 7 - Friday)**

"It's Friday night, so you know what that means!" Chris called out to the audience from the middle of the stage. A roaring cheer followed as the handsome host encouraged them to get louder and louder. "That's right, it's Challenge Night on Total Drama Academy!" Another round of cheers sounded, loud enough to reach deafening level. "We return once again to the Riker Hall amphitheater, now newly christened as simply The Marshmallow, for another night of fun and human suffering!"

"The Marshmallow?" Duncan said with a raised brow in confusion. "What kind of name is that? And who the hell would come up with it in the first place?" He didn't notice Cody nervously scratching his head.

"Before we get this party started, let's have Trent and Sadie front and center at this time!" Chris announced. The audience applauded and cheered the two names called.

Trent gave a wink to his goth girl, who softly giggled in appreciation, before making his way to the center of the stage. Sadie looked quite worried despite receiving a pat on her hand by Katie before joining the music man.

"To recap, Trent shocked the world last week by winning Brunch of Disgustingness," the host explained. "Sadie, on the other hand, was the loser by being the first to blow chunks and is therefore going into this week's challenge at a disadvantage. How much of a disadvantage will be determined by Trent as he takes a spin of... The Random Loser Generator!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "If you ask me, maybe they should come up with a different name for that wheel. Random Loser Generator doesn't seem to do what it's name implies."

* * *

Chef Hatchet shoved the giant wheel onto the stage. Instead of twenty-one faces, there were now five numbers in numerical order. The audience applauded lightly upon seeing the object appear. Trent tried to comfort Sadie with a smile and a pat on the shoulder before spinning the wheel clockwise. After it span for several seconds, the wheel slowed to a stop. The arrow was pointing at the number three.

"Keep in mind this number, ladies and gentlemen," Chris said. "I will explain the significance of this number and how it will factor into Sadie's disadvantage later. But first, we need to set things up for tonight's challenge! A good ol' fashioned Battle of the Sexes!" The audience cheered with excitement.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "Okay, this time I'm positive we can beat the guys. We already had Brunch of Disgustingness last week, so we're bound to have something that will likely play to our advantage."

Duncan - "The girls are going down. The best they have going for them is Miss Fitness Buff and, fortunately for us, there's only one of her. There ain't no way they're gonna beat the guys."

Eva - "I've been needing to blow off some steam since losing to Jessica's boyfriend. This will work just fine."

Justin - "The girls don't stand a chance. Really. There's no female, and I mean no female, who can ever overcome the greatest obstacle to ever be put up against them. Me."

* * *

"Here's the skinny," Chris began to explain. "There will be five teams of two per gender. The boys will be chosen by Chef Hatchet and the girls will be chosen by Jessica. I will set up which team faces who and in which order. Now then, let's pick the teams!"

"Hang on a second!" LeShawna cried. "Aren't you even gonna tell us what exactly we're gonna do in this challenge?"

"Not yet," Chris answered. "It's more fun leaving you guys in suspense."

"Git," Noah cursed under his breath.

"Jessica!" Chris called out. "Why don't you pick our first pair of lovely ladies?"

The group's Resident Assistant tapped her lips as she took a good look at the girls for a moment. She then turned to Chris with a smirk on her face. "Izzy and Katie," she announced.

A number of males in the audience began to chant Izzy's name, though they were utterly out of sync. Katie turned white upon hearing who she was going to be partnered with. The unpredictable nature of Izzy didn't scare her. It absolutely terrified her. The crazy girl glomped the thin BFFFL from behind and giggled with delight.

"We're gonna make an awesome pair!" Izzy declared. Katie was too afraid to do or say anything in response.

"I'm sure you guys will," Chris said with a chuckle before turning to Chef. "You're up, big guy!"

Chef snorted as took one glance at the boys and then looked back at the host with a shrug. "DJ and Geoff," he simply said.

"Excellent!" Geoff cheered as he gave an equally excited DJ a high-five.

"Jessica?" Chris asked the R.A.

Jessica studied the girls again and once again formed a smirk on her face. "Beth and Eva," she said.

Eva raised a brow and then glanced over at the girl announced as her partner. Beth looked surprised and then gave a nervous smile at the fitness buff. Eva simply shrugged.

"Chef?" Chris asked.

Chef snorted again. "Justin and Tyler," he said.

Tyler looked perplexed. He turned his eyes over at the gorgeous body he was to be teaming with. Justin appeared absolutely oblivious to anything that was going on. His attention fixed squarely upon his reflection in the mirror in his hand.

"Guess we should just move on then," Jessica noted to Chris. The handsome host simply shrugged. "Bridgette and Heather."

There were a number of gasps, even from the audience. Bridgette looked quite appalled to be working with someone she wanted little association with. Even Geoff, who was rarely upset about anything, did not like seeing his girl partnered with someone as manipulative and conniving as Heather. The queen bee simply turned her nose up at the glares she was receiving.

"Tension," Chris commented aloud, forming a wicked grin on his lips. "I love it! Chef, my man! Who's the next pair?"

Chef snorted once more. But this time, hauked a loogie into a bucket much to the disgust of everyone in the Marshmallow. "Cody and Noah," he stated.

"What?" the two students named cried. Their eyes had shot wide open in shock. They nearly turned white when they heard the squeals of females from the audience. Followed by guys mocking them by making kissing sounds.

"I curse you all and hope something slightly unpleasant happens to you," Noah seethed at the audience.

"Like onions falling on their heads?" Owen blurted out. After pausing a moment to take in just how ridicules that sounded, Noah stared at the hefty blonde for a moment and then rolled his eyes in disgust.

"Moving along," Chris chuckled at the misfortune of the students on stage. "Ball is back in your court, Jessica."

"Thank you, Chris," Jessica said. "I believe the next team will be Gwen and Lindsay."

Gwen held back a groan, knowing that it would be a useless gesture. Not only would she not be able to get out of being partnered with Lindsay, but she knew that the blonde would not be able to comprehend why she was groaning in the first place. Instead, she sighed and looked over to see her partner engaging in a silent conversation with her own hands.

"Hold up!" LeShawna said in realization. "With Sadie on the side for whatever reason you have, that leaves me with Ms. C.I.T."

"You mean I have to be partnered with the girlfriend of that backstabbing traitor?" Courtney cried.

"Did that pinhead of a punk boyfriend of yours not tell you how much I dislike any one who has a problem with my man?" LeShawna growled at Courtney. The C.I.T. nearly hopped back in terror when she found herself face to face with the girl who was apparently going to be her partner. "You especially!"

"Alright kids, settle down!" Chris called out. This was in spite of the lovely smirk he had on his face. It grew wider when the audience exhaled their excitement for the drama that was being displayed. "You'll wanna save that energy for later, believe me. So the girls are Izzy and Katie, Beth and Eva, Bridgette and Heather, Gwen and Lindsay, and Courtney and LeShawna. Very nice picks. Your turn, Chef."

Chef hauked another loogie into a bucket. The groans from the audience made for seeing such a disgusting sight getting louder. They were afraid it was only going to continue. "Ezekiel and Owen," he announced.

Before either Ezekiel or Owen could react to their names being announced, Duncan and Harold exhaled collective groans. They were the only two names left. Meaning they were going to be partners.

"Why am I being partnered with him again?" Harold asked.

"Does it really give you that much pleasure to see the two of us, who completely despise one another, be forced to team together in the hopes that we'll just say, 'Screw it!' and engage in fisticuffs?" Duncan asked.

"Yes!" Chris answered gleefully. "Yes it does! It brings in the ratings, after all."

"Figures," Duncan sighed.

"Lay one finger on my sugar and you a dead man!" LeShawna yelled at the delinquent.

"Hey, you have no right to boss us around!" Courtney cried at her partner. "You may be Harold's boyfriend, but that doesn't give you the right to throw your weight into a situation you have no business being in!"

"Oh, now you really did make it my business!" LeShawna yelled back at her partner. "For one, you implied I had a big booty. That is one place you do not go with me. And second, you've been carrying your grudge against him for so long it's beyond straight up trippin'. It's utterly wack!"

"Yo!" Chris screamed, bringing the attention back to him. There were scattered cheers from the audience, a number in approval of LeShawna's confronting Courtney. "I love the drama going down here. I really do. But we have a challenge to do and people paid good money for front row seats. Any way, the boys are DJ and Geoff, Justin and Tyler, Cody and Noah, Ezekiel and Owen, and Duncan and Harold. Now, time for me to arrange the match ups!"

"Can we at least get an idea of what we're supposed to be doing in this challenge?" Cody asked.

"No!" Chris replied. "It'll ruin the fun of seeing your reactions after everything else has been arranged. So then, our first match up will be... DJ and Geoff vs. Gwen and Lindsay."

Three of the four competitors announced merely shrugged at having to face one another. Lindsay was still oblivious to the fact that her name was mentioned at all and was still heavily into the conversation she was having with her hands.

"Oh, don't worry," Gwen said aloud in a sarcastic tone. "She's getting some advice on strategies for us to use."

"Second match up will be... Cody and Noah vs. Bridgette and Heather," Chris announced.

"This one should be fairly simple," Noah said quietly to Cody. "All we have to do is get the girls to turn on one another and then it's smooth sailings from there. And given how much every girl in the group hates Heather, it'll be a piece of cake."

"Third match up will be... Ezekiel and Owen vs. Beth and Eva," the handsome host continued.

"Oh dear," Ezekiel said in a worried tone. "I'm tryin' too apologize to all the girls for what I said back on the sh'oo and n'oo I gotta compete against them. And Chris puts me up against Eva."

"Don't worry, Zeke," Owen tried to assure the prairie boy. "As my uncle always told me, 'When the going gets tough, the tough hide under the table'. We'll just hide under a table and we'll be fine."

"Gee, thanks," Ezekiel responded with a raised brow. This brought him no comfort whatsoever.

"Fourth match up will be... Justin and Tyler vs. Izzy and Katie," Chris announced.

Izzy immediately leaped in front of Justin's line of sight and growled in his face. "At last, I shall have my revenge!" she declared. "You will pay for being the phony and liar that you are!"

"Will you get off this trip that you are on, crazy girl?" Justin cried, waving his arms in a rather pathetic manner to try and swat her away. "How many times do I have to say it? We never dated!"

"Liar!" Izzy screamed. Her male fans cheered her on while Owen gingerly moved his girlfriend away from Justin at Chef's behest.

"Should be a fun one," Chris snickered. "Which leaves our main event to be... Duncan and Harold vs. Courtney and LeShawna!"

"What?" all four named students cried in unison. The audience exploded with excited cheers.

"Are you for real?" LeShawna growled.

"Yes I am!" Chris proudly answered. "The hate vibe that I got from you four was more than enough to convince me that it was the very definition of both 'Total Drama' and 'Main Event'. This is going to be awesome!" He started laughing.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "I..."

Duncan - "... hate..."

LeShawna - "... that..."

Courtney - "... man!"

Chris - "I love being me!" /_Teeth sparkle._/

* * *

"So what happens to Trent and Sadie?" Beth asked rather innocently.

"Oh yeah, that's right!" Chris started to answer. "I got caught up with the greatness of what our main event will be like that I almost forgot about them. Thanks for reminding me, Beth. You get a cookie!" Jessica tossed a chocolate chip cookie to Beth, who munched on her treat happily. A section of the audience cheered for this, which Chris merely raised a brow at and shrugged.

"Trent, when you took a spin of The Random Loser Generator, you landed on the number three," Chris explained. "Which means you and Sadie will participate in our third match up partnering with the team of your respective gender. So it'll be Ezekiel, Owen, and Trent against Beth, Eva, and Sadie."

Beth welcomed Sadie with a friendly wave. Eva just stood perfectly still like a statue, not even acknowledging the idea that she had another partner. Ezekiel let out a sigh of relief that he had another partner and gave Trent a high-five. Owen then scooped the two into one big group hug that started to suck the air out of their bodies.

"Easy, big guy," Chris chuckled. "You'll need them alive. Since this is a Battle of the Sexes and there are five battles, the winning gender will obviously be the ones to win three match ups. In the event that one of the match ups is considered a tie, the audience will decide who the true winners were. They will also get to decide who the most valuable player on the winning gender is, thereby picking the overall victor of the challenge, as well as pick the least valuable player on the losing gender, who will then be the one to go into next week's challenge with quite the handicap."

"So how is the winner of the round normally determined?" Harold asked.

"Chef, Jessica, and I will be officiating over all five match ups," Chris answered. "Oh, and you're gonna like this one. Regardless if the winning gender gets the three victories before the main event, it's still going down!"

"You frontin' me?" LeShawna cried. "We still gotta do this challenge even after it's officially over?"

"We want to make it fair for the audience in voting the winner and loser of the challenge," Chris explained in his reply. "Not to mention you guys don't want to be shafted for simply not participating."

"I hate him so much..." Courtney muttered quietly.

"Well, we pretty much have all we needed to explain out of the way," Chris stated. "So I guess it's time to announce just what kind of challenge this is. And I can't think of a better way to have a good ol' fashioned Battles of the Sexes without having a good ol' fashioned... Food Fight!" The audience cheered at this announcement.

"A food fight?" Heather scoffed. "That's so elementary school."

"Not a 'Total Drama' Food Fight," the handsome host noted. "You will be engaging in actual battles. Instead of flying food with your bare hands, you'll be launching them with these bad boys." He revealed in his hand the biggest super soaker any of the students had seen. The audience voiced how they were in awe. "There's also some additional weaponry you can use that's available off stage, but you better get them before the start of your match. Even better is that the food you will be flinging upon one another is leftovers of the cafeteria buffet from the entire week. As catered by Chef Hatchet."

The audience groaned and screamed as all eyes turned to a grinning Chef. Next to him were several pots of the most vile sludge to be considered food any one had ever seen. Ezekiel immediately grabbed a near by bucket and hurled.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - "When I leave this s'kool, I hope to never ever encounter Chef's cooking ever again, eh."

* * *

"Nice one, Zeke," Chris chuckled. "Oh, you and teammates would appreciate the fact that one of your opponents is Sadie. Her handicap for this challenge is pretty simple. She doesn't get to use any of the super soakers."

"What?" Sadie, along with Katie, cried in horror.

"That's right, you don't get to fire any thing on the field of battle," Chris stated. "What's more is that you will already be completely covered in the food particles at the start. Thereby giving your team a disadvantage in the challenge."

"You prick!" Eva hollered, showing some form of emotion for the first time since the day started. Beth pouted and then hung her head in disappointment. "You might as well give them a freebie!"

"I could, but I won't," Chris said. "Drenching your opponents in Chef's food is the point of the challenge. So it's going to take some skill and cunning to overcome the odds. And if you really use your brain, which given that Beth is a Smarty Pant you might wanna try to do, you'll figure out a strategy that will surely get you guys the win."

"I smell something fishy," Noah commented quietly. "And I'm not talking about the contents of Chef's apple crumble."

"Alright then, boys and girls," the handsome host announced to the audience, clapping his hands together. "Are you ready for some good ol' fashioned fun?" The audience let out a cheer of approval. "Then let's get this party started! On to our first match of the evening, DJ and Geoff vs. Gwen and Lindsay!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Geoff - "It sucks that in this challenge I have to drench a pair of cool chicks, man. Gwen's a friend of Bridgette's and Lindsay is one hot mama. But at least I'm not going up against my Bridge." /_Swoons_./ "I could never dare do anything horrible against her. Even if she has accidentally caused me a number of bumps a bruises since we started going out. Like a black eye and a cut on my waist or a dislocated shoulder and a broken hip..."

* * *

"Um, okay Linds," Gwen began in her attempt to communicate with her partner. "I need you to be focused in being able to participate in this challenge. Because if you don't... those guys are going to mess up your face."

"But why?" Lindsay asked. "My face is too pretty to mess up!"

"The goal is for them to turn you into a sloppy mess," Gwen explained. "Using leftovers from Chef's cooking."

"Ewww!" Lindsay cried. "That's so gross!"

"I know," Gwen actually sympathized. There's nothing more disgusting then having to even touch that stuff. "They want to mess up your pretty face and your pretty hair. Because then you won't look good for Tyler. So you have to mess them up first."

"Okay," Lindsay said, trying to take in Gwen's advice. "But why do I have to mess them up?"

Gwen thought about what answer to use. She smirked when one came up. "Because Heather thinks you can't do it," she said.

That lit a fire in Lindsay's blue eyes. "Heather thinks I can't mess up boys, huh," she said sternly. "I'll show her!"

"Contestants ready?" Chris called out. The pairs took their positions at opposite ends of the stage. "Battle field set?" Quite suddenly, the floor of the stage slid open and up came what appeared to look like a gas station. Complete with gas pumps and oil cans. This had caught everyone except Chris, Jessica, and Chef completely off guard. "And... Go!"

Still filled with the determination implemented by Gwen, Lindsay was the first to fire. The stream of slop connected on DJ's leg, causing many in the audience to gag and scream. DJ and Geoff immediately took cover behind the pumps while Gwen and Lindsay went behind the oil cans.

"Remember, you have a time limit of two minutes!" Chris called out using a megaphone. "Which ever team is drenched the most are the losers! So get a move on!"

"Since when was a time limit announced?" Noah asked to deaf eyes.

"Aw man, two minutes can go by fast, dude," Geoff said to DJ. "Especially if we're on defense the whole time. And you already got some of the slop on your leg!"

"I dunno if I can shoot at them, man," DJ whimpered. "Lindsay hasn't stopped shooting since it started!"

"Sorry, guys!" Lindsay called out while still firing. "But I'm not gonna let you mess up my face!"

"That's my girl!" Tyler cheered.

"We just might have a chance at this after all," Gwen muttered aloud quietly to herself.

She tapped the oil can she was crouching behind and noticed that there was something inside. She took a sniff and immediately covered her nose and mouth in disgust. It was Chef's cooking alright. After a moment's thought, she had an idea. Gwen peered over at the gas pumps DJ and Geoff were hiding behind. She studied the the nosels for a moment and then fired at them. Seconds later, the nosels were dislodged. And were spraying Chef's cooking all over the boys.

"Dude!" Geoff cried in terror.

DJ simply screamed like a little girl. And the audience loved every second of it. It wasn't long before Chef blew a whistle, signifying the end of the match to the relief of the boys. When all was said and done, Gwen and Lindsay were completely clean while DJ and Geoff were drenched in the horrible substance.

"Well, I think it's perfectly obvious who won this round," Chris gleefully announced. "Gwen and Lindsay give the girls a one to nothing lead to open the Food Fight Challenge!" The female members of the audience let out screams and cheers as Gwen and Lindsay gave one another a high-five in victory. "On to the next match. Bridgette and Heather vs. Cody and Noah!"

"There is no way I'm playing this stupid game," Heather stated sternly with arms crossed.

"It wouldn't hurt to at least try," Bridgette responded in an annoyed tone. "And it shouldn't be that hard, really. Noah's no good at physical activities, so we just chase him away and have Cody fend for himself."

"I am not going to risk letting one drop of that disgusting crap touch me," Heather seethed.

Bridgette stared at Heather for a moment. It was obviously going to be a hopeless attempt to budge the queen bee into doing something she clearly didn't want to do. With a determined sigh, Bridgette raised up the super soaker and squirted light spray of Chef's cooking onto Heather. The audience gasped and seconds later a section of the crowd cheered.

"Hey, we haven't even started the match yet!" Chris called out. He seemed to lack conviction in his voice as he just merely grinned. "Ah well. Contestants ready?"

"How dare you!" Heather shrieked. "You just stained my shirt! Do you know how much work I'm going to have to do to clean this?"

"No, and frankly I don't care," Bridgette replied. "All I care about right now is beating the boys. You should be thinking the same thing too because they will be determined to do much worse than I did if you don't fight back."

"You want me to fight back?" Heather growled. She picked up her super soaker and aimed it at the surfer. "Fine! Just be careful what you wish for!"

"Battle field set?" Chris announced.

Just as Heather was about to pull the trigger, a tree shot up from underneath Bridgette. The surfer screamed, wrapping herself around the top of a pinophyta tree that continued to grow upward. Heather was distracted by the sudden appearance of evergreens on the stage that one of the branches knocked the super soaker out of her hand. When she realized it was missing, she found that it had landed next to Cody and Noah.

"Go!" Chris called out.

For the next two minutes, Cody and Noah gleefully doused a screaming Heather in streams of disgusting substance. The audience cheered them on, taking pleasure in seeing the queen bee suffer. Bridgette, on the hand, looked as though she was about to cry. Being stuck at the top of a tree felt too much like she was being left alone in a forest.

"Help!" she cried. "Somebody please help me!"

"Don't worry, babe!" Geoff called out. He was still covered entirely in Chef's cooking as he began to climb up the tree Bridgette was in. "I'll save you!"

"Awww," Lindsay cooed at what she was seeing. "That's so romantic!"

"And that's the match!" Chris announced as the two minute time limit expired. "Cody and Noah have easily tied it up for the boys and we're one to one going into our triple-threat match!"

As the audience cheered, Cody and Noah pumped fists, and Heather screamed in frustration over her misfortune, the stage began to revert back to form. This caused the tree to drop down. Which in turn caused Geoff to scream as he fell to the ground and was smacked by every branch as they came down. Moments later, a shaken Bridgette was brought to the ground as the tree disappeared beneath her. She looked over expecting to see Geoff. What saw caused her to scream in terror.

"Bridge, it's me!" Geoff cried. Having been covered in Chef's cooking and then littered with evergreens all over made him look anything but himself. Not to mention the substance covered part of his mouth, making his voice sound unnatural. Which made Bridgette not believe him and scream even more. Sensing this, Geoff looked over to Chef in a panic. "Chef, bra! Could you wash me off, man?"

Chef grinned as he raised up his super soaker. Geoff realized this was the same super soaker from the Hide and Seek game back on the island. Meaning this was not going to be pleasant. Chef aimed and fired before any objection could be voiced. The gigantic stream had so much force that it knocked Geoff into Bridgette and the two ended up a number of feet away from their previous place on the stage. When the stream died down, both were completely drenched. In Geoff's case, he was clean of all the substance that had previously covered him.

Bridgette coughed a bit to clear water out of her mouth and shook her head. After blinking a bit, she noticed Geoff was lying upon her. "Oh my goodness," she squeaked. "Are you alright, sweetheart?"

Then she heard a sigh. One that let her know he was more than alright. She got a better look of him and blushed in embarrassment. Geoff's face was snuggled happily between her boobs. The audience took notice and squealed their approval.

"Geoff!" she hissed in a low tone. "Not in public!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - "Okay, so I might have sounded a little hypocritical since Geoff and I make out a lot. In public. But there are some things I feel we should... well... keep private." /_Starts blushing._/

Geoff - /_Swoons_./ "I love Bridgette so much. Everything about her is perfect. Her hair... Her face... Her eyes... Her lips... Her smile... Her body... Her legs... Her boobs..."

* * *

"Very frisky, kids," Chris chuckled. "But you guys need to move the loving elsewhere. We still got a challenge to wrap up. On to the next match. The Triple-Threat Showdown with Ezekiel, Owen, and Trent vs. Beth, Eva, and Sadie!"

As the six students took their positions on the stage, Sadie whimpered when Chef came up behind her with a large bucket in his hands. Seconds later, he turned it upside down over her as his cooking ran down and covered her entire body. After he walked away, Sadie let out a tearful cry.

"Just leave everything to me and I'll make sure those wimps get doused," Eva said to her teammates.

"Don't you think we should--" Beth attempted to suggest before getting cut off immediately by the fitness buff.

"There isn't much time to strategize," Eva reasoned. "We're going in already behind, so we have to go all out. Guns blazing! Just stay out of my way so you won't accidentally get hit and we'll be fine."

"Well, we just lost most of our advantage," Trent noted as he watched Owen shoot all the contents of his super soaker into his own mouth. The hefty teen let out a huge burp and giggled.

"That tasted good!" he said in a jolly voice. "You guys gonna eat yours?"

"We're supposed to be firin' that stuff at the girls, eh," Ezekiel commented in a worried tone.

"But that's not a nice thing to do," Owen said. Apparently he had completely oblivious to what the challenge was about.

"Throwing food at them is what a food fight is all about," Trent explained.

"There's a food fight?" Owen asked with excitement. "Woo hoo! I love food fights! All kinds of food that comes my way for me to eat. It's like they're just giving me stuff that they don't want to eat."

A light bulb went off in Ezekiel's head. "Hey, I got an idea, eh," he said.

"Contestants ready?" Chris announced. Ezekiel immediately whispered his plan to Trent, who in turned passed the message along to Owen. The big guy seemed to have understood. "Battle field set?" Without any warning, the six contestants found themselves standing in the middle of a giant hamster cage. How it managed to just suddenly appear without them noticing, they probably wouldn't get an answer for. "And... Go!"

The boys immediately ran over to the giant water dispenser. Owen stood in a guarding position while Ezekiel and Trent tried to remove the object. Eva fired at them with everything she had. Every stream ended up going into Owen's mouth. Being the physically weaker of the boys, Ezekiel would occasionally turn and fire off some streams of Chef's food at the girls. A couple caught Beth at the expense of him getting one from Eva.

"Got it!" Trent called out.

He and Ezekiel carried the dispenser as they jumped onto Owen's arms. The big guy immediately ran over to the hamster wheel with Eva in pursuit. Eva was chasing Owen around on the wheel. Ezekiel and Trent propped the dispenser on Owen's shoulder and cut open the top so as to direct Eva's streams into the object, which in turn Owen was be able to suck into his mouth through the other opening. Ezekiel and Trent would take turns firing at Eva or occasionally at Beth, though they themselves were hit with strands fired by the girls. This continued until Chris announced the expiration of the time limit.

"Looks like we'll have to actually judge this round, folks," the handsome host stated. Along with Chef and Jessica, he began inspecting each of the six contestants. Each had some kind of splatter of Chef's cooking on their persons. The three then conferred with one another before he announced their results. "We've reached the decision that the girls were covered with more food particles than the boys. Which means Ezekiel, Owen, and Trent take the match and give the boys a two to one lead!"

Eva threw down her super soaker in frustration while Beth hung her head in disappointment. Sadie hadn't stopped crying since first getting covered in the substance. The boys cheered with Owen scooping his two teammates up in his arms and jumping with joy.

"Great thinking there, Zeke," Trent commented.

"Thanks, eh," Ezekiel responded.

"Let's see if the girls can tie it back up," Chris continued. "Our next match is Izzy and Katie vs. Justin and Tyler!"

"This will be a piece of cake, man," Justin said to Tyler. "I'll just rip off my shirt and distract the girls while you fire on them. They won't be able to look away from my beautiful chest."

"Whatever, man," Tyler shrugged. He looked over and noticed something odd. "Wonder where Izzy is."

"Don't know, don't care," Justin responded. "The crazy girl is not immune to my charms, any way. So it doesn't really matter."

"I dunno," Tyler said as he raised a curious brow. "I'm sure she has something up her sleeve."

"Katie, where's your partner?" Chris asked the skinny BFFFL.

"I don't know," Katie whimpered. "She said she saw something he liked off stage and she hasn't returned since."

The handsome host merely shrugged. "Your loss, then," he stated. "We got a challenge to do and we need to keep things rolling. So, contestants ready?" The boys nodded while Katie franticly shook her head. "Battle field set?" The stage turned into a high seas fare. The boys standing in one replica of a boat while Katie stood in another. "And..."

Before Chris could finish, music began playing in the Marshmallow. Everyone looked around, wondering where it was coming from. They noticed the speakers set up through out the amphitheater was blaring. Some recognized the music immediately as "Ride of the Valkyries." Seconds later, a large cannon slowly rolled out onto the stage from Katie's side. Standing atop the cannon was Izzy dressed as Napoleon Bonaparte, complete in full costume and her right hand tucked into her shirt. There were thunderous cheers, particularly from the scattered chants of her name by male members of the audience.

"What the hell is this?" Justin cried in shock. "She's not allowed to use that, is she?"

"She found it off stage," Chris shrugged. "And I didn't officially start the match, so I'd say it's allowed."

Izzy cackled as she revealed in her left hand an iPod with a long cord attached. It apparently was hooked up into the sound system of the amphitheater. No one was going to dare ask her how she managed to do that.

"Any way," Chris said. "Contestants ready? Battle field set? And... Go!"

"Fire!" Izzy cried.

Quite suddenly, cannons popped up to surround Justin and Tyler. Izzy pressed a button on her iPod and the music that played became the "1812 Overture." Some found this rather ironic given who she was dressed as. The cannons fired in sync with the music, completely covering Justin and Tyler in Chef's cooking. Tyler immediately ran off the stage in terror while Justin found himself being trapped by the cannons as they closed him in.

Izzy laughed in a maniacal manner as the music reached its final notes. At the very end, the large cannon she was standing on fired, cause her to literally fly off onto the ground. The impact caused Justin to fly off his feet and crash into a wall. The audience cheered wildly at what they had just seen.

"You win!" Justin cried, barely able to move his body underneath the mass of substance covering him. "I give up! I surrender! We did date briefly and I broke it off with you! There, I just admitted the truth to the world! Are you happy now?"

"Ju'z one more z'ing," Izzy replied in a fake French accent. She blew at him a rather loud raspberry. "Z'ere! Now I am satisfied!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Justin - "I should have done what that other ex-boyfriend of hers did. Graham, or whatever his name was. A restraining order against her. Though two hundred meters is not far enough."

Izzy - "I'd rather rip my heart right out of my ribcage with my bare hands and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it 'til I die than spend one more minute with that liar!"

* * *

"Well, I think it's pretty clear who wins this one," Chris said. "Izzy and Katie obtaining victory in this round means they have tied it up two to two going into our main event! Courtney and LeShawna vs. Duncan and Harold! This is gonna be awesome!"

The second he had the super soaker in hand, Duncan fired a quick shot at Harold's back.

"Hey!" Harold squeaked. "What was that for?"

"Testing to make sure it worked," Duncan replied. He was about to form a grin, only to get a face full of Chef's cooking in his face.

"You can bet there's more where that came from!" LeShawna hollered.

"We haven't even started yet, LeShawna!" Courtney complained. "You're supposed to wait until Chris tells us to go!"

"Tell that to that punk boyfriend of yours!" LeShawna growled back at her partner. At that very second, she was hit in the side of the face by a stream of the disgusting substance.

"I can hear you loud and clear from over here, thank you!" Duncan yelled back. He was suddenly sprayed in the face by another stream of Chef's cooking. But this time, it didn't come from LeShawna.

"How dare you spray this gunk on my girlfriend!" Harold said sternly. Then he received a shot in the face of the substance.

"That's the point of this challenge!" Courtney yelled. "It's boys against girls! You guys are supposed to be shooting at us!" She shrieked upon feeling a stream of Chef's cooking on her face.

"Have I not warned you about picking on my man?" LeShawna screamed.

"Uh, guys?" Chris called out. "We haven't officially started the match yet. Guys? Guys!" His words fell on deaf ears as the four contestants were firing upon one another. It became more so of Courtney and Duncan vs. Harold and LeShawna as opposed to boys against girls. And the audience loved every second of it. "I think we'll just wait until they empty their super soakers."

It was ten minutes before the last drop from the last super soaker was shot. All four were utterly drenched in the horrible substance and glaring at each other. They were daring each other to even consider continuing the fight. Unrecognized by them was the roar of cheers and applauds from the crowd.

"Now that was a main event!" Chris announced. "Talk about taking drama and hate to the next level! You four just went for the jugular and kept going! Unfortunately, that just makes our job to judge who won the round a little harder. So you're going to have to give us a minute to figure how we're going to decide this. In the meantime, could some of you guys make sure these four are separated from each other?"

Duncan and Courtney wanted no assistance as the two immediately walked off the center stage together. Both were fuming, sure to explode any second and cause all of the substance that covered them to fly all over the place. LeShawna was quite angry herself, but managed to calm herself as she and Harold were helped off by Gwen, Trent, Geoff, and Bridgette.

"That was so cool!" Izzy proclaimed, perched on Owen's shoulders and eating from a bowl of popcorn he was also eating from. "I can't wait to see the rematch!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie and Sadie - Katie - "That was, like, so scary!"  
Sadie - "I know, right? I never thought Harold had it in him to be so violent!"

Cody - "Wow! That was a lot of rage Courtney had been keeping inside her. I don't ever want her to hold a grudge like that against me ever. I doubt I would survive."

Beth - "I thought I've seen Duncan mad. This was way worse than anything I had seen before. And the things he's done in the past is considered normal behavior."

Owen - "Dude! Did you see LeShawna? There was so much hate in her! I don't think a hug is going to be enough to make her feel better. I'm afraid to get within two feet of her!"

* * *

"Well, we've come to a decision," Chris stated after a moment of deliberation with Chef and Jessica. "We can't score on which side got wasted the worst since all four looked equally soaked. So it was decided that the losers were the ones who got hit first. Which is pretty obvious that it was the boys. That means the girls win the Battle of the Sexes three to two!"

Every girl in the audience screamed and cheered with excitement. The girls on stage celebrated, although there were four faces that didn't look all that victorious. Courtney and LeShawna were still shooting death glares at one another. Heather just sulked away from the group entirely. Eva shook her head, feeling she was not satisfied since she didn't win her match.

"Okay, ladies and gentlemen!" Chris announced, clapping his hands together. "Time for you to vote the overall winner and the big time loser of this challenge. Underneath your seats are voting devices that you will use to cast your vote. You will first be deciding who among the boys was the big time loser. And then, you will be choosing who among the girls was the overall winner. Cast your votes... right now!"

The group waited as patiently as they could while the voting took place. Much of their attention was spent making sure Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna did not engage in another fight. The girls had their arms crossed and cursed the other in silence. It was some time before a piece of paper was handed to the handsome host.

"And here are the results!" Chris called out. "The big time loser you've chosen for this challenge is... Justin!"

Justin glared, or rather was trying to glare if one could see underneath the mass of Chef's cooking that covered him, at the handsome host. And then at the jeering he received from male members of the audience.

"All this hate, I love it!" Chris stated. "Justin will once again be going into next week's challenge with a handicap. Twice in three weeks has got to suck, dude. Now then, on to our overall winner. And this will obviously come as a no brainer to our audience. With one hundred percent of the votes, the winner is... Izzy!"

The Marshmallow exploded into a cheer. Izzy herself let out a cry of victory before grabbing Owen by the collar of his shirt and throwing him over to the side of the stage and behind the curtains for what was sure to be the wildest make out session yet.

"Um, Izzy?" Chris called. "You need to pick your prize from the prize pile."

"First one!" Izzy cried out before forcing her lips back on Owen's.

"Don't you even want to know what prizes you're choosing from?" Chris asked with a raised brow.

"First one!" Izzy repeated louder.

Chris stared for a moment then shrugged. "Okay, first one it is," he said. "As the winner of this challenge, Izzy has won herself the first of three prizes she would've chosen from. So instead of a sweet forty-eight inch flat-screen television or a swank Toyota Corolla, Izzy will be getting every cookbook written by Emeril Lagasse."

"Woo hoo!" Izzy cheered before going back to locking lips with Owen.

Chris stood frozen for a few moments before blinking. "I'm not even going to bother to comment on that," he managed to say.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "What would Izzy do with Emeril Lagasse cookbooks?"

Cody - "Does she even know how to cook?"

Heather - "I shudder to think the kind of horrors that psycho hose beast would even consider making in the kitchen."

Ezekiel - "W'ood it be better or worse than Chef's food?"

Izzy - /_Puts the finishing touches to a papier-mâché bust of herself using pages from the cookbooks she won. She examines the bust and giggles with delight before placing it on a stand behind her._/ "This should brighten things up in here. And to make sure that no one messes with it..."

Chef Hatchet - /_Glares at Izzy bust and snorts._/ "I'm not impressed." /_Punches the bust, but upon contact receives an electrical charge that shocks his entire body and screams._/

Chris - "Booby trapped bust, eh? Not bad, Izzy. You certainly know how to use that genius intellect you displayed in your entrance exam when you want to. Though I still don't want to know the details. Would probably give me nightmares."

* * *

Here is a recap of the matches and the results:

**Match One** - Gwen and Lindsay defeated DJ and Geoff

**Match Two** - Cody and Noah defeated Bridgette and Heather

**Match Three** - Ezekiel, Owen, and Trent defeated Beth, Eva, and Sadie

**Match Four** - Izzy and Katie defeated Justin and Tyler

**Match Five** - Courtney and LeShawna defeated Duncan and Harold

**Winner** - Izzy

**Loser** - Justin

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy

* * *

Guess I made that challenge at the end of the last chapter way too tricky. Probably too cryptic as well. Good try to my pal **Kobold Necromancer** for at least trying, but The Princess Bride is a movie I grew up on so that's hardly a new obsession. I'm surprised no one even pointed out the use of Talking Heads lyrics in Izzy's speech in the last chapter. Any way, the challenge in identifying my new obsession is still up. Here's a hint that will hopefully help. Pay attention to Noah's lines from both last chapter and this chapter. From there, think Rowan Atkinson.

To answer a question **Intrigued Soul** asked, an eiderdown is defined as the soft feathers from the breast of a female duck, a heavy comforter, and a warm light fabric of wool, cotton, or man-made fiber generally used for sleepwear. In the case of the scene in the last chapter, the third description is probably the best suited one.

---

**Next Up:** Weekend Preparations


	9. Week 3, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Nine

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Previously on Total Drama Academy...

Gwen and Trent going on a private dinner date was so sickenly cute, romance was in the air for all the couples. Just ask Lindsay and Tyler. Though Katie is still stumbling at actually making a move on her crush, much less reveal who it is. Practically everyone and their grandmother knew that Courtney was going to run for a spot on student council. But unbeknown to her, Heather has hooked up with a clique that will no doubt contend against Ms. C.I.T. Eva has prided herself on being physically the best, but in trying out for the school wrestling team she met her match in the form of a student who just happened to be the boyfriend of the group's Resident Assistant, Jessica.

Challenge Night brought about another Battle of the Sexes using Chef's cooking as projectiles in our version of a good ol' fashioned Food Fight. Izzy managed to find some cannons and connected her iPod to the Marshmallow's sound system, giving the audience the most amazing display of one-sided chaos ever seen. All at the expense of hunky ex-boyfriend Justin. The girls beat the boys and the crazy redhead claimed total victory while Justin will be going into the next challenge at a disadvantage.

But the real drama that went down was in the main event. Not waisting any time letting the actual match begin, Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna engaged in an epic war that was not so much Courtney and LeShawna against Duncan and Harold as it ended up becoming Courtney and Duncan vs. Harold and LeShawna. Even after they fired every last drop of the disgusting substance at one another, nothing was settled. And you can bet that not only is it going to get worse, but we'll also be looking for ways to exploit it.

Will Heather prevent Courtney from making student council?

Will we ever learn just who Katie has a crush on?

Will Justin ever recover from his humiliation?

Find out in this edition of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

**(Week 3, Day 1 - Saturday)**

**(Confession Cam - Now with Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy)**

Chris - /_Reads a statement in a forced, unconvinced manner._/ "The producers of Total Drama Academy... would like to remind... our viewers... in particular... parents... that this particular... season... of the show... will include... suggestive themes... present... whenever the cameras... are turned on. This is, after all... a show about... teens... who do... teen things. We would.... therefore... like to remind... our viewers... in particular... parents... that parental guidance... is strongly... suggested." /_Stares at the statement then flips the paper over to see if there's anything more before looking back at the camera._/ "I think what they're trying to say is that watch at your own risk, people. There's some teenage fun to be had!"

* * *

Bridgette and Courtney had just exited their rooms. They were on their way to the girls bathroom for showers when they saw Duncan and Ezekiel emerge from their rooms. Both looking extremely tired, as though they had not slept the entire night. Ezekiel seemed quite upset at the apparent lack of sleep while Duncan appeared very annoyed.

"What happened with you two?" Bridgette asked.

"There was a lotta noise comin' from there, eh..." Ezekiel replied in a groggy tone. He jerked his thumb over at Owen's room. He opened his mouth as if to explain more, but was immediately cut off.

"I don't... want to think about it..." Duncan grumbled. "The more is mentioned... the more likely that mental image... will be in my head..." He rubbed his eyes and yawned.

"What are you talking about, Duncan?" Courtney asked with her arms crossed. "He has that ubber spectacular entertainment set up you guys have been gushing over from day one. You should have realized the consequences that would result from that."

"Why would Owen stay up all night watching TV any way?" Bridgette asked curiously. "Was there anything on so late that it would be worth losing sleep over?"

"Maybe there was somethin' on that Izzy liked," Ezekiel shrugged. He nearly cried when a hand was suddenly slapped upon his mouth. He looked over at the person whose hand it belonged to, seeing Duncan use the forefinger on his other hand over his own mouth so as to tell him to be quite.

"Not... another... word..." Duncan said.

Just then, another door opened. They turned to see Geoff emerging from his room. He simply waved until he caught sight of Bridgette. With a big smile on his face, immediately swooped in and wrapped his arms around her.

"Good morning, babe!" he cheered before planting a big, wet kiss upon her lips. She sunk in without so much as a hint of hesitation. Upon seeing the sight, Duncan groaned and immediately shut his eyes.

"Duncan!" Courtney hissed, having noticed the punk's reaction. "How can you be so insensitive about them kissing?"

"Because it implies what happened in there!" he groaned through clenched teeth, pointing at Owen's room.

The statement caused Geoff to widen his eyes, remove his lips from Bridgette, and look over at the door leading to the room mentioned. "Really?" he asked in excitement. "Does that mean Owen got to second base with Iz--"

"Oh please, shut up!" Duncan nearly screamed. This caused the other four to be left quite startled. "I don't want to think about it! I'm leaving so I won't get scared with the mental image!"

"What is the matter with you, Duncan?" Courtney demanded. "There's nothing wrong with Owen and Izzy in a relationship." She found herself in a battle of glares with her punk boyfriend.

"Do y'oo kn'oo what Duncan is t'ookin' ab'oot, eh?" Ezekiel quietly asked Bridgette and Geoff. "It s'oonded m'oore like Owen and Izzy were watchin' one of them action m'oovies really loud. Because there were expl'oosions and stuff goin' on. And they were both screamin' and everythin'."

It was then that the door to Owen's room opened. A great puff of gray smoke emerged before a figure stepped out. Everyone looked to see Izzy skip past by them. A wide grin on her face. Hair more frizzy and messed up than before. Torn marks about her clothes. Black, charred marks on her skin. Smoke coming off her body. Humming a tune rather happily.

Izzy stopped still right as she reached the door to her room. She turned to the others, all looking at her either with faces of curiosity, confusion, or disgust. She let out a light giggle before bringing a free hand up to her face, gently pulled down one of her bottom eye lids with a pinky, and blew a loud raspberry at them. Feeling satisfied, she opened the door, skipped in, and closed it.

There was a long, silent pause among the five gathered in the hallway. Not one figuring how best to even react to what they just saw. They were now on a whole new level of disturbed.

"Oh wow, eh," Ezekiel managed to say. "Just w'oot happened in there?"

They all slowly turned to look at Owen's room. Smoke was still coming out through the opened door. Against their better judgment, they all crept over and looked inside to view the carnage.

It was a miracle the entertainment set up appeared untouched. Because the rest of the room looked as though it had several dozen bombs go off. All kinds of damaged debris laid about the room. Holes in the walls, numerous areas with charred marks about them. Not a single furniture survived. In fact, upon what seemed to be the remains of the bed was Owen. Or rather charred figure of him. Lying on his stomach. Completely naked. And smoke coming off his body.

"That was magically delicious..." he managed to chuckle very lightly in an exhausted voice. "Like a bowl of Lucky Charms..."

"Oh... my... God..." Courtney uttered. She then began to shudder. "That... description... was just... so..."

"Gross!" Duncan said suddenly. He slapped one hand over his mouth and immediately ran to the boys bathroom.

The others thought he found the sight of Owen naked in the aftermath of what just happened was sick enough. Then they spotted what really disgusted him. Just a few feet away from them, Owen's boxers were lying on the floor. While the sight of it being surrounded by a number of ripped open condom packets was gross enough, they were horrified at the sight a giant charred hole on the front side of the boxers.

Courtney immediately made her away to the girls bathroom while Geoff and Bridgette turned away from the terrifying scene. Bridgette gagged while Geoff looked as though he was about to whimper. Ezekiel was still completely dumbfounded about the whole thing, in particular why the others were reacting as they were.

"I don't get it, eh," he said to Bridgette and Geoff. "How come y'oo guys are actin' the way y'oo are?"

Bridgette sighed. She really didn't want to explain it to him, fearful that it would be better for him to be innocently confused than mentally scarred from the visual image. But he seemed desperate in understanding what all the fuss was about. She bent down and whispered in his ear what it was that Owen and Izzy did the night before.

Ezekiel's eyes immediately shot wide open. He turned pale white and his jaw dropped in shock.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - /_Still wide eyed and pale._/ "That's what happens when y'oo have sex? No wonder my parents told me people sh'ood not have sex until after they get married, eh! I th'oot it was just bec'oose it was a sin to do so!"

Bridgette - "Well, at least Zeke has a different view of why what we saw was a little... shocking. I do admit that I feel a little guilty about reacting the way I did when I first thought about it. I should be content with Owen and Izzy having... made love. I mean, who am I to judge? I'm sure if Geoff and I made love and people saw the end result it would be no less..." /_Pauses upon realizing the words she had just used to start the last statement and begins to blush madly._/

Geoff - "Way to go Owen! I know the picture of Owen and Izzy going all the way pretty scary thought, but it's no less awesome that they scored! Party on!"

Courtney - /_Frantically covering her eyes and whimpering._/ "All that just because Izzy won a challenge? I did not need to see that. I really did not need to see that. That was just so wrong and so sick on so many different levels."

Duncan - "Okay, so I blew chunks in the toilet. Who wouldn't after see those boxers? Fortunately, I have since managed to think less about what happened in there and more about how the hell the entertainment set up managed to go unscathed amid all the chaos that went down."

Izzy - /_Her body still lightly smoking, she combs her hair while singing the song she was humming earlier with altered lyrics._/ "Boy, I smell like Frito's, That's why he gives me that hungry stare, I'm so hot, I always melt, The elastic in his underwear."

Chris - /_Looking quite miffed._/ "Thank you very much, Owen and Izzy, for the mental image that will haunt my dreams forever. I never felt so glad for the cameras to have been turned off in my life."

* * *

Upon arriving in the Riker Hall living space to resume his reading, Noah spotted Katie sitting nervously on one end of the couch. About her were a few textbooks, a couple notebooks, and some pens. He immediately took the hint that she needed his help in her schoolwork at this time. He rolled his eyes and sighed before walking over to the other end of the couch.

"Well, I see you've come prepared," he remarked to her as he took his seat.

"Oh!" she nearly cried upon seeing him before her. "I figured, like, since you're you and all you would prefer I was ready to go when I needed help them trying to stumble with all my stuff, you know."

Noah stared at her for a moment then shrugged. "Whatever," he said. "Mind if I look at your report card from your last semester so I can get a clear idea of which classes you need improvement in?"

"Sure," Katie replied. She pulled a paper from out of one of her notebooks and handed it to Noah. As Noah examined her report card, she spotted DJ walking by with Bunny in tow. She gave him a shy smile and a wave, him returning with a wave of his own before exiting the building.

"Katie, what's all this about?" she heard Noah say.

She was startled a bit and turned to him with her cheeks burning pink. "My report card?" she asked nervously.

"The same semester?" Noah asked with a raised brow.

"Uh-huh," Katie nodded.

"What'd you do?" he pressed further. "Turn in some extra-credit reports?"

"No," she replied.

"You take the mid-terms over?" he asked.

"Uh-uh," she answered, shaking her head.

Noah glanced back and forth from the report card then to Katie for a moment. "You mean to tell me that you argued your way from a C+ to an A-?" he concluded.

"Totally based on my powers of persuasion," Katie explained rather happily.

"I'm impressed," Noah said honestly. "So why would you need me at all?"

"Because I don't think I'd be able to pull it off here," Katie sighed. "Remember when Mr. Black was, like, really serious and made no emotion whatsoever when Sadie and I tried to talk our way out of doing that pop quiz the other day? He just sat there in silence, which was really scary, and then five minutes later told us to sit down."

"I doubt he's ever stopped being serious or even displayed the slightest sight of emotion," Noah noted. Then he sighed and shrugged. "Look, let's just take all this one step at a time, alright?" Katie nodded. "Right. How about we begin with that discussion in history studies about refuges and whether any of the North American countries should allow them in?"

"Okay," Katie said as she began adjusting herself in her seat. "So, like, for example, when the Haitians wanted to come to America. But some people were all, like, 'What about the strain on our resources?' But it's, like, when I had this garden party for my dad's birthday, right? I said RSVP because it was a sit-down dinner. But people came that, like, did not RSVP so I was, like, totally buggin'. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, squish in extra place settings. But by the end of the day, it was, like, the more the merrier! And so, if the US government would just get to the kitchen, rearrange some things, they could certainly party with the Haitians."

Noah once more stared at Katie for a long while. The only part of his body that moved were his eyes lids when they blinked. Katie kept smiling innocently, though he wasn't sure if this was a vein attempt to appear naive to mask whatever embarrassment she was feeling or if she really was naive.

"Interesting analogy there, Katie," he finally said.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "Looks like I got my work cut out for me with Katie. At least it won't be as boring as it was at my last school were."

DJ - /_With Bunny in hand._/ "It's good to know there's someone as nice as Katie around. Most everyone else here seem more concerned with losing their minds than taking the time to say, 'Hi!' to someone."

Katie and Sadie - Sadie - "You didn't even try!"  
Katie - "Hello? I needed to work on my studies. I can't, like, make a move every second he and I are in the same room."  
Sadie - "You promised you would talk to him."  
Katie - "And I will, Sadie. That just wasn't the right time."  
Sadie - /_Sighs._/ "So Noah was, like, so impressed with your thing about the Haitians?"  
Katie - "Totally! Only I forgot to mention how it does not say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty."

Chef Hatchet - "Will the skinny one hurry up already and just say who she's crushin' on? The bet's gone up to a hundred and I don't want it to go any further!"

Jessica - "Part of the deal was that the amount to be paid increases the longer Katie goes without revealing her crush. An old trick I picked up from my mom a few years back. Sure it's a risk, but I'm quite certain I know who she likes."

* * *

Both Harold and LeShawna were reaching a point of desperation in their relationship. They had not had any real time to spend together. Alone. Harold decided to remedy the situation by asking her to join him for a walk. She was still in a rather unpleasant mood over the events of the previous night and really wanted to brood a little more. So he had to talk her into tagging along. The mention of their not having been with one another privately was enough for her to go with him.

They took a quiet tour of the campus, looking for any routes that would lead them away from any sort of unwanted public attention. After some time, they felt content enough to stop in the middle of a little grotto. Harold commented that it really didn't look like much of a grotto really, but neither were really complaining. They sat upon a boulder that rested at the end of a very small pond and gazed out at the scenery before them.

"Is your family doing alright?" Harold asked, breaking a brief silence between them.

"Yeah," LeShawna nodded. Then she began to cackle. "You shoulda seen my best cous' LeShaniqua's face when I told her you and I was an item. Woo man, she was all, 'If he's anything like that one dude in that movie, you two would be tearing up the dance floor for sure!' Mom's starting to accept you and me as a couple."

"That's good to know," he said. "My sister is the same way. She's actually trying to give me so-called advice for when I'm dating you, though. Like, she wants me to watch nothing but Queen Latifah movies."

"For real?" she asked, now beginning to laugh hysterically. "You know, I should take that as a compliment. Comparing me to Queen Latifah. Your sista's alright."

"Too bad she's the only one," he sighed. "Mom is still having trouble even comprehending the idea of you and me, while my brother... I don't think it really matters what kind of a girl I date. He's never really supportive of me and he ends up disliking any one who even tries to befriend me, really."

LeShawna let out a more frustrated sigh than the sorrowful one Harold had exhaled. "It's really starting to bug me with all this hate people have against you, and with no good reason," she stated. "Even if you and I weren't dating, I would never stand by and let others just push you around like you were a piece of garbage. Can't people ever accept you for who you are?"

"Apparently not," he answered with another sigh. "Then again, I've never been all that social in the first place being that I've been a loner by choice. So I guess part of it has to do with me being withdrawn from every one else mostly."

"That still doesn't explain some of the actions from others," she reasoned. "Like your brother. Why does he disrespect you so?"

"I actually never did figure that one out, really," he shrugged. "Every time I tried to ask my mom, she would tell me that he was just in one of his bad moods. It's like she's trying to avoid giving me an answer or something."

"Must be really whack if she's doing that," she noted quietly. Then she sighed again. "Makes me wonder just how bad it is in comparison with the grudge Duncan and Courtney have on you."

"I've been trying to find a way to apologize to Courtney about what happened on the show," he said. "It's difficult when the only time she doesn't have Duncan around she is so focused on her studies that nothing else is recognizable to her."

"And that's another thing that's been bugging me," she said. "Courtney is so stuck up that she won't give you the time or day to apologize. You want to apologize and she won't even let you. That's just not right with me. No one would ever hold a grudge against someone that bad unless that richly deserved it. It's like she's becoming another Heather, and that is something I do not want to have to deal with."

"Then there's Duncan," he sighed. "It's like he's so bent on troubling me until the end of days, you know. Before, he was just bullying me for the heck of it. Now, he's after me because of what I did to Courtney and it's worse than ever. It's like, he's the manifestation of the worst parts of my brother. That's way more than I can handle."

There was another silence between them. The only sounds being made were the chirping birds about and the occasional muttered conversations amongst students several yards away. Moments later, LeShawna slowly placed her hand over Harold's. He looked up to see her give him a smile.

"I know we didn't get much accomplished in terms of getting this relationship moving forward," she said. "After all, we're nothing like Trent and Gwen. Not even close to Bridgette and Geoff. We have this attraction to one another, yet for whatever reason or another we can't seem to keep the ball rolling. Just have faith that we'll finally get some kind of momentum going and before you know it, they'll be looking to us as the golden couple from the show."

"Gosh," he said rather shyly. "That would be quite the accomplishment."

"That's the prize, baby," she said. "Until then, we just need to hang in there. And as far as those obstacles with Duncan and Courtney go, remember that I got your back any time and any place. You don't have to fight your battles alone. I'll be there right beside you no matter what."

"And I'll do the same for you, LeShawna," he said.

She lightly giggled. "You one crazy white boy, Harold," she said quietly. Then she leaned forward to give him some sugar.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "I feel really sorry for Harold and LeShawna some times. Trent and I have this great relationship going, but then I see them just not being able to move their's any further than they probably want it to. I've been offering LeShawna to help her find a way to get things moving along, even considering doing a double date one weekend."

Trent - "Gwen told me about how Harold and LeShawna's relationship keeps getting sidetracked by something and really wants to help them out. She even went as far as suggesting that we bring them along for a double date. I'm more than willing to help out a pair of friends, so I'm open to just about anything Gwen asks of me."

Cody - "Is there something I'm missing? I've learned so much about attracting the ladies... yet, despite my apparent popularity with all these girls, I can't seem to get a girlfriend. And here's Harold, who is quite similar to me in a lot of ways. He has a girlfriend. What is it that I'm not getting...?"

Beth - "Cody has been so nice to me ever since we got here. Even though I'm part of the smart group, I still have trouble with some of my studies. He's been more than willing to help me when I ask. He's very kind. You don't meet guys like that every day, you know. I haven't... until I met him..." /_Starts giggling and snorting nervously._/

Eva - "What's with all this lovey dovey crap going on around here? At my old school, it was never like this. It was all about winning competitions. I'm starting to miss that place and that's saying something. Rat infestations, constant ceiling leaks, security checks at every door, no books, no blackboards. It's the biggest hell-hole in Canada not Camp Wawanakwa."

Chris - "Hmmm... I should do a little research into Eva's last high school... Could give me an idea for a future show..."

* * *

**(Week 3, Day 2 - Sunday)**

Heather sat quietly at a corner table, away from any unwanted attention, as she slowly ate her lunch and studied a collection of notes, papers, and folders spread out before her. Running against Chelsea would be at least four other candidates. Among them was, of course, Courtney. Heather figured she could deal with her should the need ever arise. She was more concerned about how to prevent votes from being casted for any of the other three.

Lacking the popularity or even respect of the students at Richmore Academy, Heather knew she had to come up with new strategies and plans to manipulate the situation to her benefit. This meant having to figure out weakness on her targets that she could easily get to. She loved being able to pull the strings that could shatter the fates of others. She just disliked having to do the research. In her opinion, it took up time. Nevertheless, she had to do what needed to be done to accomplish her goals.

Based on the information she learned in the past week, Patrick was a seemingly average junior student. Acceptable grades, had his own nitch group of friends, is a member of couple clubs. Nothing really out of the ordinary.

Which meant that poor boy would stand no chance against a one-sided verbal battle. The right choice words would cause him to break down in tears and maybe ever wet himself. He posed no threat and could be easily disposed of within a week.

Larry was marginally more challenging. Formally a key player on the school basketball team, a knee injury ended his sports career and he decided to take up debate classes as means of feeding his competitive drive. His success there has led him to test the waters of a potential political future. Obviously, verbal battles against him would be more costly.

It was his morals that Heather learned could be his downfall. Often times sensible, he did often have trouble with occasionally producing a questionable line of thinking. In particular his quiet sexist attitude and a great fear of homosexuals. He has done a very good job keep both as much of a secret even from his closest friends. It would take more than just word manipulation to have him admit aloud such revelations. But she was sure she could figure something by the end of Thursday.

Janet was the most challenging of the three. A shy girl who was just so well liked for her sunny personality. She reluctantly accepted her popularity and was so kind that it made Heather want to barf. The girl had a spotless record, little that would be of use against her. She could hold her own in a debate and was rather athletic in her own right. The other students would gravitate to her with great ease that she didn't even have to realize the affect she had on them.

As much as taking out Patrick and Larry would be enough given that there were three spots open, Heather decided it would be better to have it down to just Chelsea and Courtney than have a third body in the mix. Janet was going to be quite tricky indeed. No one would dare say anything bad about her. It was like she was the sweetest, most innocent creature on the face of the Earth. The primary reason Heather wanted to utterly ruin the poor girl.

Having not unearthed any weaknesses she could exploit, Heather knew that a smear campaign would be the best course of action to take against Janet. But even then that would be problematic as it would be difficult for any one to believe the girl to be any thing other than this pure, angelic figure. She would have to pull some nasty tricks that she did have in mind if this were to succeed in some fashion.

Yet for all the focus Heather had on wanting to bring down Janet, she knew that the clique would probably be more concerned with Courtney being a problem. Heather had nothing against the fellow camper, but then was far from even friends with her. A civil understanding was the term they both had for each other. Courtney didn't necessarily approve of Heather's tactics to stay top for so long on the show, but gave her credit for managing to make it far. Heather respected someone who was a clear authoritative figure like Courtney and admired her ability to solve problems to her advantage.

So why care more about Courtney than someone else like Janet? Why prefer to leave Courtney alone as opposed to taking her out in an effort to make sure Chelsea had no real challenger? This ended up troubling Heather as, despite having some amount of respect for her, she quite frankly didn't care all that much about Courtney.

Perhaps it was the fact that Courtney could counter with just as much intensity and fire-power as the clique. Politics was Courtney's arena, not Heather's. Heather could pull all the tricks she had up her sleeves, yet Courtney would manage to find something that would nullify their effects so as to keep herself from being harmed. Courtney knew all of the ins and outs of running a campaign, something Heather didn't know all that much about.

If nothing else, Courtney also had Duncan at her disposal. Even if Courtney wasn't as politically savvy as she was, Duncan had the ability to pull the same kind of tricks Heather could and more so. Not to mention Duncan was absolutely fearless, a personality trait that worried Heather. She had to keep her actions from not only being traced back to the clique, but also to herself. He would have no problem taking the fall to prevent his girlfriend from being involved.

Heather sighed as she tapped the end of her pencil upon the nearest sheet of paper. All of this second-guessing and reevaluating of strategies and tactics left her exhausted. Another reason why she disliked having to do research despite its necessity. Not to mention that it was incomplete given that there could still be more candidates entering the picture within the next two weeks. Even still, she had a good idea of which candidates were non-factors and which ones were to be of concern running against Chelsea With a free hand, she grabbed her cup of coffee and took a cautious sip. There was still more work to do.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Lindsay - "I know I, like, really shouldn't care and stuff, but Heather hasn't been seen around is such a long time. I mentioned this to Gredda in passing and she said that she was probably plotting something. Although, I don't think plotting would be her kind of thing, really. I can't picture Heather, of all people, plotting plants or trees. She's too mean for something so nice."

Tyler - /_Finishes putting up a Toronto Maple Leafs banner underneath the Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard as well as the Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti._/ "What? I got bored looking at the same stuff for the last few days. I'd put up a picture of Lindsay if I wasn't afraid someone would mess with it. I could never let anything like that happen, even if it was just a picture. Anything with Lindsay on it is sacred, dude." /_Sighs in bliss._/

Owen - /_Places a necklace made of Frito's on the Izzy bust and giggles._/ "Izzy must be Jamaican, because she's Jamaican me crazy." /_Giggles again and kisses the Izzy bust on the lips, resulting in him getting zapped._/

* * *

"Are you sure Geoff won't mind that we have our meeting here?" Courtney asked Noah as she took a seat at the end of Geoff's bed. Duncan sat just inches away from her and leaning back.

"Oh, I'm sure he'll have trouble having to cope without being in his room," Noah said sarcastically from behind his book. "Maybe he should pay Bridgette a visit and see if she could help him figure how they could kill time together."

"You've really worked out your banter, haven't you?" Duncan asked with an amused chuckle while Courtney just rolled her eyes.

"No, not really," Noah replied. "This is a different thing. It's spontaneous and it's called 'wit'."

"Look, let's just get this over with," Courtney sighed, throwing up her hands up for effect. "Campaigning officially begins tomorrow and we got two weeks to make a good enough impression that I'm among those called in early for the school officials interview."

"So you need to come out tomorrow morning with a bang," Noah noted, still from behind his book.

"That would be preferable," Courtney responded.

"That shouldn't be a problem," Noah said. "I just hope you're all prepared and ready to go with your campaign pledges and speeches. I'd hate to find that someone wasn't holding up their end of the bargain."

"Look who's talking," Duncan stated. "For all we know, you've spent all your time on either school work, helping Katie with her studies, or behind any number of books you've probably reread fifty times by now."

"Sixty, actually," Noah sarcastically noted. "I have been keeping up my end of the bargain, actually. In the middle drawer between the beds, you'll find what I've done since agreeing to help you with your campaign."

Courtney raised a suspicious brow for a moment. Then looked over at Duncan, who looked just as perplexed as she was. With a sigh, she leaned over and opened the middle drawer. She was quite surprised to see a number of folders, packets, and papers. She pulled out a hand full and skimmed through them. Her eyes widened with surprise.

"You managed to get everything so detailed?" she asked while Duncan grabbed one of the stacks in her hands and had a look for himself. "It would take me months to put together this much information and piece them together in an organized fashion."

"When you read books as many times as I have, you pretty much know everything by heart," Noah said, still from behind the book. "The only other thing I needed to do was ask a few questions from people here and there in regards to your likely opposition. Speaking of which, you'll be one of three frontrunners if you stick to your guns and indeed strike first as I highly advise you to."

"You believe this Janet girl and this Chelsea chick to be the other frontrunners?" Duncan asked as he continued to go over the papers he had in his hands.

"Precisely," Noah answered. "They're both rather popular, smart, and competitive. Just on different ends of the spectrum. Janet is a goody-goody, Chelsea is part of this clique that's been about as close to running the show around here as they are able to without the school officials interfering."

"How much of a challenge will they be for me?" Courtney asked, going over another set of papers from the drawer.

"Under normal circumstances, you wouldn't stand a chance in hell against them," Noah replied. "Janet is the kind of popular girl who is so kind-hearted everyone worships the ground she walks on. And even without being associated with this clique she's a part of, Chelsea is the kind of politician that would make Michaëlle Jean look like Lindsay Lohan."

"Which is why we should establish princess as the candidate for the position right off the bat, is that right?" Duncan asked. His concentration on the subject was broken for a split moment when he noticed Courtney made no reaction to his calling her princess. She was definitely focused on the task at hand.

"Correct," Noah answered. "And to accomplish that, we need every student at Richmore to wake up tomorrow morning and see that she is the only candidate for them to even think about all the way through."

"And how do you propose that?" Courtney asked with another raised brow.

"It's quite simple, really," Noah began to reply, this time looking up from his book to look at her. "Firstly, we shall fight this campaign on issues, not personalities. Secondly, we shall be the only fresh thing on the menu. And thirdly of course..." Noah then turned his eyes toward Duncan and formed a smirk on his face. "... We'll cheat."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Toronto Maple Leafs Banner and a Frito's Necklace on the Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy)**

Courtney - "I'm starting to feel better about Duncan talking me into having Noah on my side. I really don't think I could hold my own against him had he decided he wanted to run for office after all."

Duncan - "Gotta hand it to the egghead, really. When he's in his element, he's quite the force to be reckoned with. Not to mention the idea he had in mind for that first strike was something I had no problems sinking my teeth into."

Noah - /_Reads his book for a moment before looking up at the camera._/ "Should you be so surprised I would be able to do all my school work, help Katie with her studies, hold up my end as Courtney's campaign manager, and still have all kinds of time to waste to reread my books? This is me we're talking about. I am, however, inuspeptic, frasmotic, even compunctious if I have caused you people such pericumbobulations in the process." /_Rolls his eyes and scoffs before returning to his book._/

* * *

Bridgette wasn't sure at first if she wanted to engage in such a passionate act of romance with Geoff after what they had seen the other day. One deep kiss that lasted a good twenty minutes changed her mind and was instantly in the mood for some loving with her boyfriend. She straddled his waist while he positioned himself on top of her, their both being laid out upon her bed.

Her main concern was the fact that the cameras were still on, as it was not yet midnight. Meaning she was not quite willing to remove any article of clothing off her body. Still, she didn't mind losing herself completely in the extremely long game of tonsil hockey she was engaged in with Geoff. Although he would occasionally release their lip lock and snuggle his face up against her boobs. She couldn't help herself from giggling when he did this. Though she started to wonder why he kept doing this lately.

"Geoff, sweetie," she said. "I have to ask. What are you doing?"

"I'm taking in the best, most awesome part about you, Bridge," he replied with a swoon. "Next to your kisses."

Bridgette sighed. "You really think my boobs are that awesome?" she asked with a slight hint of playful annoyance.

"Of course they are, babe," he said. "They're so awesome that they're also beautiful and soft."

"Maybe you're just a little jealous because Zeke was squeezed up against them on our first day of class," she teased.

"That was just an accident," he stated quickly and calmly. "Besides, I get to feel them more than any one else."

Now she giggled and rolled her eyes in disbelief. "Do you realize how much of a pervert you're acting like right now?" she noted.

"As long as I'm acting like one over the best girl around," he responded. He then brought himself up so as to resume making out with her. The kisses lasted for a good long while before they were broken up. "You know I love you, right babe?"

"Of course, you goof," she said with another giggle. "Because I love you, too." Their lips locked for another deep kiss that went for a while. "It's just that you do a lot of... seemingly strange things, you know. Snuggling up against my boobs, for example. I know we're still... a little weirded out by yesterday to even think about... going where they went. I just feel as though you tend to come off... I hope you don't take this the wrong way... childish."

"Oh, I'm sorry, babe," Geoff said. "I just get, you know, really excited about being with you. In fact, I've never been as excited being with you as I am with anything else I get excited about. And I want the time we have together to last. Even if now we get to see more of each other than we did after the show. I want to savor every moment we spend with each other."

Bridgette blushed and swooned little. "You're such a sweetheart, Geoff," she said. "Some of what you just said may be a little corny, but it still warms my heart knowing your affections for me are true."

"They always will be, Bridge," he noted. "There may be many hot girls out there, but none of them are you. You're the best of the best. So are your boobs."

She started to laugh. "I can't believe you just said that!" she nearly cried.

"Well, they are," Geoff chuckled. "I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."

She raised a teasing brow at him. "You really think my boobs are the best?" she asked.

"Most definitely, babe," he replied and chuckled again. "In fact, I want to sleep here tonight."

Bridgette squealed and laughed as Geoff brought his head right back to her boobs and once more snuggled up against them. "This is such the silliest and most perverted thing I've ever seen," she said through her laughter. "And yet I never thought such a thing would also be so romantic."

"I'm in Heaven," Geoff said breathlessly. Seconds later, a laughing Bridgette lightly smacked the back of his shoulders with a pillow.

"Not yet, sweetie," she teased. "You're just at the Pearly Gates. If you come up a little closer, then you'll be in Heaven." She gave a rather seductive smile to him when he looked up at her. He formed a sly smile of his own before slowly bringing himself up so that they would again bring their lips together.

They would make out non-stop for several hours.

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner

* * *

I figured that, despite the T rating, people might get shocked with the direction I ended up going in this chapter and therefore threw in that warning at the beginning. Some of it was due to the great fun my pal **Kobold Necromancer** and I had with a particular line I wrote some chapters ago. He loved it so much he borrowed it for his story "Love Ain't Easy, It's Ezzy." So I obviously had to have my own little fun with such a scene, too.

Speaking of Kobold Necromancer, he has correctly guessed my new obsession. So he gets a cookie. Which is me writing a one-shot of virtually any TDI related subject of his choosing. Just let me know what you like me to write and I'll get to work on it, though it might take some time before it gets published as I'm still working on this and my Harry Potter story. I managed to pick up the entire series of Blackadder at the beginning of the year and have been completely engrossed in it. To the point that I realized Blackadder's dialogue would be just right for someone like Noah.

I was going to add something here as well, but I forgot. So I'll just say keep sending in them reviews.

---

**Next Up:** Courtney's First Campaign Strike


	10. Week 3, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Ten

---

**(Week 3, Day 3 - Monday)**

Courtney had finished taking her morning shower and wrapped a towel around herself. Once she was done brushing her teeth and applying the few makeup she routinely did, she made her exit out of the girls bathroom. As she stepped into the hallway, she looked up to see that someone was waiting for her. The sight caused her to literally gasp in shock and to hop back a few inches. Standing before her was a fully clothed Noah. He had his arms crossed and was tapping right right toes. Looking as though he had been waiting for an hour.

"What the hell, Noah?" she nearly cried.

"My apologies," he said, though she wasn't sure if there was any sincerity in his voice. "I wanted to make sure you had some kind of small speech ready to go just in case."

"In case of what?" she asked with a raised brow.

"It's part of what we got going for your first strike," he answered. "So, do you or do you not have a small speech ready?"

"No," she replied after a moment's thought. "Noah, you haven't exactly told me anything about what this first strike I'm supposedly going to be making is."

"You'll know very shortly," he said as he turned and made his way back to his room. "Let me know when you've finished getting dressed. I'll pick out a speech for you to use, should it become a necessity."

"Aren't you even going to give me a hint as to what you're doing?" she asked.

"The less you know, the less likely the negatives will be traced back to you," Noah answered before slipping into his room and closing the door behind him.

Courtney let out a frustrated sigh and hung her head momentarily. When she looked back up, she noticed a heavily tired looking Duncan slowly make his way toward the boys bathroom. When he got to the door, he paused and turned his head toward her.

"Something the matter, princess," he managed to utter in a groggy tone.

There was a quick flash of surprise on Courtney's face. Here she stood, clothed only in a towel. And he wasn't making any sort of perverted advance. Instead, he was looking to see if she was alright. She had been so used to him looking for any excuse at engaging in a passionate moment that she was not prepared for his gentler side.

"I don't know," she sighed upon returning to her previous melancholy state. "Today is the day I start campaigning. Yet I don't have a single clue as how it is being run. I'm glad to have Noah as my campaign manager and all, but I at least want some kind of idea as to how he's helping me."

"Relax, he's got everything under control," Duncan yawned.

"What do you mean?" Courtney asked, raising a curious brow.

"Noah said not to say too much because he doesn't want it traced back to you," he merely replied. "All I can say is that I'm lacking sleep at the moment because I've been spending the entire night helping him put together your first strike."

"You know?" she nearly cried.

"Of course I know," he said. "Don't you remember? I'm doing all the dirty work. The kind you don't want to be involved in. Given how this place runs, we're thinking you're better off not knowing the details so that it would fall on me. Besides, you'll see the end result in a moment. So it's not like you'll be kept in the dark forever."

Courtney stared at Duncan for a moment. In disbelief over what she had just heard. Seconds later, she found herself blushing light shades of pink on her cheeks.

"You'd take the fall... for me?" she asked breathlessly.

"Isn't that what the knight is supposed to do for his princess?" he replied with a grin.

Courtney let out a gentle sigh. Then she lightly walked up to Duncan and placed a kiss on his cheek. "That's very sweet of you, Duncan," she said. "Thank you."

"No problem," he said. Then his grin got wider. "Although... how about you thank me by joining me for a shower."

Courtney rolled her eyes and groaned. "You just had to ruin the moment," she said before shoving him through the door into the boys bathroom. She was about to turn when she heard a thud. Followed by a familiar squeak. Bitting her bottom lip in embarrassment, she nervously turned toward the door. "Whoops. Um... Sorry, Zeke."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Fully dressed, sighs._/ "I sometimes wish Duncan would be more romantic than... well... seductive will have to be the word. Not that I don't like when he's seductive. But... his romantic side is what I really like about him. Some one who is really caring and gentle. Seeing that part of him makes me feel..." /_Begins to shake and swoon._/ "Euphoric is the word, I guess..."

Duncan - "The only downside to me dirtying my hands is that I have to, as Noah put it, 'tone down' my 'public displays of affection' for Courtney. He had a point when he said that it would mount the belief that she's making me do all this. We're already going to be eyed with suspicion, so we're banking on me keeping out of sight to get the job done. And for that to work, I can't get too personal around her so the attention won't get drawn to her whenever we're outside Riker Hall. I don't have to tell you just how much I think that sucks."

Ezekiel - /_Holds an ice pack on his toque-covered head._/ "I still don't get relationships, eh. Duncan will do and say these thin's that make Courtney wanna hit him, and yet not long after their makin' 'oot. How is that romantic? And with the way their kissin', they're sure to have sex. I don't want my room to be like Owen's room, eh."

* * *

"Are you sure you're okay, Zeke?" Bridgette asked, help Ezekiel place the ice pack on the exact spot on his head. "Perhaps Mr. Black will be understanding if you went to the nurse's office."

"Although if he isn't, you can at least cover the ice pack with your toque," Geoff suggested. One by one, the group was slowly beginning to gather in the Riker Hall living space. Already Bridgette, Geoff, Ezekiel, Courtney and Duncan where there, fully dressed for another day of school.

"It doesn't hurt that bad," Ezekiel reasoned. "My mom told me ab'oot how long to keep an ice pack on a w'oond for. Especially when it's on the head, 'cause if it's on there too long I'll get a brain freeze, eh."

"I'm really sorry again for what happened," Courtney said. "You sure you don't need me to help you with anything?"

"Nah," Ezekiel said, shaking his head lightly. "I'm good."

"Oh no," Lindsay gasped from behind them as she entered the living space. "Did Enrique get hurt? Awww, you poor thing."

Ezekiel suddenly felt her arms wrap around him from behind. His eyes shot wide open when he felt something else. Her boobs upon his shoulders and pressed around the back of his head. The feeling causing his cheeks to burn hot red.

"I hope you feel better soon," he just barely managed to comprehend hearing her say.

"Oh, I think he's feeling better already," Duncan snickered.

When Lindsay finally released her embrace on Ezekiel and stepped away, the prairie boy began to wobble a bit. Bridgette and Geoff immediately took hold of him from either side to keep him standing straight. His eyes were still popped wide open and his cheeks were still blushing. Little drops of water falling off his head made it known that the ice pack was beginning to melt.

"Maybe we should assist you a little to homeroom, Zeke," Bridgette suggested.

"Sh'yeah, bra," Geoff agreed. "You look like you're about to tumble over. Are you sure you're not that hurt?"

Duncan was on the verge of bursting out in laughter over the ridiculousness of what was happening in front of him. Courtney snapped her attention to him long enough to shoot him a death glare. He only mildly tried to stop.

"Oh, come on," he reasoned. "One day, he was hated on by virtually every girl on the show for being a sexist. Now he's being pampered by them like he's the cutest little infant in the world. So what's funnier than seeing his face when Lindsay's hugging him the way she was? Bridgette and Geoff believing he's about to flop because the conk on his head was more hurtful than originally thought." Duncan started to laugh before receiving a stiff punch in the arm from Courtney.

"Zeke got hugged by a girl just now?" the ever familiar voice of something joyful, yet disturbing sounded. They looked over to see Izzy, perched on the shoulders of the giant oaf of her boyfriend Owen, with arms raised in victory entering the living space. "Woo hoo! He'll be getting those other hugs today in no time!"

Courtney and Duncan began to shudder upon seeing the sight of Izzy and Owen together. The memory of the other day's morning revelation still fresh in their mind. It was then that Noah entered the living space and approached them with a piece of paper in hand. He noticed them shuddering. He analyzed a bit and saw that Izzy and Owen were beginning to giggle and kiss with Izzy leaning over Owen's head to do so.

"I take it there's something you guys know that I'm better off not discovering," the egghead commented. Courtney and Duncan immediately nodded. "Good. It will spare me many nights suffering from disturbing dreams." He turned directly to Courtney and handed her the piece of paper. "Here's a small speech you can use should it necessary."

"Will you just please give me some sort of hint as to what you've got planned for me to throw out this first strike?" Courtney asked following a sigh. "I think it would help that I know what is in store for me."

"You'll see for yourself very shortly," Noah said.

Though it was the third week since they started attending Richmore Academy, any one of the twenty-two could still stopped by a large number of fans whenever they left Riker Hall. The popular ones, in particular, found that it would be better to leave in groups that included those who would help pass through the seemingly never ending sea of bodies blocking them from homeroom. Having Owen in a group was considered a good thing because, despite his popularity, the fear of his passing gas caused the fans to keep their distance. At the risk of their own health just be being near him, those who managed to tag along with him did so quickly.

With a group consisting of Owen, Izzy, Bridgette, Geoff, Ezekiel, Lindsay, Courtney, Duncan, and Noah formed, they made their way out of Riker Hall and onto the school campus. Once they were outside, all but two froze in place and gasped with wide eyes. Noah and Duncan nearly grinned while the others stared in disbelief at what they saw.

Every side of every building in Richmore Academy was covered with large images of Courtney's smiling face and the words "Vote Courtney for Vice President" written out on top.

Courtney tried to say something, but nothing was coming out of her mouth. Light shades of pink were beginning to form on her cheeks as she turned to Noah and Duncan. Both merely motioned with their fingers that they were zipping their lips and throwing away the key. Not wanting to give away too much information so as not to seem she was responsible for it. She was still in a shocked daze when the two grabbed either side of her arms and led her toward homeroom.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Still blushing._/ "That... That was... Oh my..."

Duncan - /_Chuckles as he slaps a "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer over the Wing Commander Poster._/ "I bet this is the first time she's been speechless about the way a campaign of hers is taking off."

Noah - "I'll only say one thing about our first strike. It wasn't paint, because it sure as hell would've taken forever."

Heather - "You can bet Chelsea and the rest of the clique are not going to like this. If nothing else, this resulted in a bullseye painted on Courtney's back. Nothing personal, but it seems I'm going to have to concentrate on firing at that target now."

Chris - "Since the cameras were conveniently turned off during the alleged vandalism of school property, there appears to be no concrete evidence to be used against any one suspected of being responsible." /_Chuckles with a smirk._/ "Good one."

* * *

"It is my understanding that today is the first day in which those who wish to run for student council," Mr. Black announced, in his familiar emotionless tone of voice, once all twenty-two students were in homeroom and seated. "Allow me to be the first to say that the spectacle that was on display this morning will not be tolerated by myself or any other member of the educating staff here at Richmore Academy."

He then turned his attention, or rather the student imagined he did, upon Courtney. It appeared his neck was making crackling sounds when he did so and still he remained stone-faced. "I will also not tolerate you spending time in my classroom working on your campaign, Ms. Courtney," he continued. "The classrooms in Richmore Academy are to be a place to discuss education, not politics. To put it in more clearer words, do not concentrate your efforts on planning your speeches while in homeroom. Have I made myself understood?"

"Y-Yes, Mr. Black," Courtney nodded nervously.

"Good," Mr. Black said. He turned back to facing everyone, his neck crackling as it moved. "I would also like to add that you are forbidden from posting flyers in this homeroom to further emphasize the value of education. If there are no further questions, you are all to enter a state of silent study as I continue to request from each of you every morning."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer)**

Ezekiel - "That Mr. Black is so creepy, eh. Whenever it looks like he's lookin' at me, it makes me afraid he's gonna jump over that desk and hurt me. And I'm sh'oore I'm not the only one that feels that way."

Cody - "It's like he's got this contained rage inside him and it'll be let loose if one of us ever dares to break one of his rules. The thought of what would happen kind of scares me, really."

Beth - "I wonder what Mr. Black is really like when he's not teaching. Is he one of those softie types who displays this stern exterior on the outside? Or is he hiding this really psycho personality for the sake of not going to jail?"

* * *

**(Week 3, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

Soon enough, they were not exclusively the only ones whose attention was taken away from their studies. A number of other students who just happened to be sitting nearby were also lost in what they were witnessing. After all, it's not everyday you see something like this. If nothing else, one is left wondering about a lot of things.

Izzy balancing a pencil on her nose and then having the very heavy math book balanced on top of that would qualify as a sight that had such effects on people. Her humming to a song as though there was nothing wrong with what she was doing only added to the shock value on display.

Gwen and Noah were the only ones of the group who looked at what they were seeing not in horror. Rather, they were actually not surprised and raised their brows more out of being impressed that the crazy girl was actually pulling it off successfully. Courtney, Beth, Cody, Harold, and Ezekiel, on the other hand and like any one else watching, hand their hands over their mouths and praying nothing bad would happen.

"... rewriting seven thousand and three hundred times ten to the negative fifth in scientific notation," the math professor announced to any one who was listening, writing the equation out on the board. "Who wants that problem?"

"I do!" Izzy cheered, waving her right hand about while still managing to maintain her balance.

Some of the students who had been watching her gasped. For one thing, she was going to be speaking while attempting to keep hold of her balance. For another, she had paid attention to what was being taught while at the same time not losing any focus on her balancing. They didn't dare blink so that they could catch every millisecond of what would happen next.

"You sure you want it?" the math professor asked curiously as he saw what she was doing.

"Uh-huh!" Izzy replied. "Seven point three..."

"Seven point three..." the professor repeated as he wrote the equation out on the board.

"... times ten to the third," she continued.

"... times ten to the third times..." the professor added.

"Ten to the negative second!" Izzy proclaimed, raising her arms in victory. There was another gasp as the students watched to see that she still kept hold of her balance.

"Impressive," the professor remarked. "Very impressive, indeed."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "Izzy is madder than Mad Jack McMad, the winner of last year's Mr. Madman competition."

Gwen - "I'm thinking Izzy is so smart, she became insane just so she wouldn't be bored."

Harold - "The thing that surprised me the most was that the pencil managed not to break under the pressure of the textbook."

Izzy - /_Sings the song she was humming._/ "You're not allowed to be loud at the library, At the art museum or at a play, But when you and your partner are doing the nasty, Don't behave like you're at the ballet!"

Chris - /_Looking increasingly miffed._/ "Now she's just rubbing it in, isn't she!"

* * *

**(Week 3, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

**(The Others)**

"Is this field trip really necessary?" Bridgette asked in a whimper.

"Now there's a surprise," Duncan teased. "Malibu doesn't mind scrapes, bruises, and broken bones. But she's frightened of looking at a bunch of dead bodies. Afraid they'll come to life as zombies and eat your brains?"

"Duncan, stop it!" Bridgette screamed as she wrapped herself around her boyfriend Geoff. "I just don't like seeing human insides exposed, alright? It's so gross."

"Yeah, same here," DJ admitted in a terrified tone. "Seeing all the body parts that are in us, it's all so slimy and disgusting."

"Will you ever grow a spine?" Eva grunted. "How the hell did someone as strong as you turn out to be such a wuss?"

"Not everyone with toned muscles can be a snarling beast like you," Heather scoffed aside. Unfortunately for her, Eva managed to hear her and was immediately shot a death glare.

"I can't believe I gotta put up with this for two years," LeShawna sighed.

"Well, look at it this way," Trent said in an attempt to cheer his friend up. "True we have to put up with it for two years. But it's only for a few hours a day for five days a week. The rest of the time is spent however we want to spend it."

"You always looking at things at the positive end of the spectrum?" LeShawna asked with a smirk and a raised brow.

"Better to find something positive about a situation than to be overwhelmed by the negatives," Trent replied with a shrug.

To this, LeShawna laughed heartily. "No wonder Gwen is so madly attracted to you," she stated. "You don't seem to let the bad stuff get you down."

"I try not to if it happens," Trent shrugged. "I can't say I'm prefect. Remember what happened back on the island with Heather?"

"You don't need to remind me," LeShawna said, raising her hand up as if to keep him from saying any further on the issue. "The fact that you two got through it is more than enough to convince me that you two have it good. Can't say the same thing about myself and Harold, though."

"Hey, come on," Trent said, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Just because your guys' relationship hasn't take off like mine and Gwen's, doesn't mean it won't succeed. Just give it some time and everything will be fine and dandy."

"Just wish it were that simple," LeShawna sighed.

"Look, if it makes you feel any better, Gwen and I are willingly to help out any way we can," Trent suggested. "We're even open to the idea of putting together a double date if you guys are."

LeShawna raised a brow in interest. "Double date, huh?" she stated. "One without these cameras in our faces?"

"You know as well as I do that Gwen would kill to make sure the cameras weren't about," Trent said.

LeShawna thought about it for a moment. "Let me talk to Harold and see if he's up to it," she said.

"No rush," Trent noted. "Just let us know if you guys are willing."

"Okay, students," the biology professor announced. "Gather around the table over here so we can continue with this week's lesson on the human anatomy at this time."

The fourteen students made there way to an examination table where the professor and a coroner hovered above what appeared to be a body covered by a white sheet. Bridgette was still clutching Geoff and had now buried her face on his shoulder, not wanting to really watch what was about to happen. She was not the only one squeamish as Katie and Sadie were whimpering and covering their eyes with their hands. DJ was awfully close to biting his finger nails. Although one person who didn't appear to be frightened at what was about to take place was surprisingly Lindsay. Primarily because she apparently did not have a single clue as to why they were there in the first place.

"Who are these guys?" she asked curiously, pointing at all the bodies in the room. She was ignorant to the quiet chuckles behind her while Tyler tried to glare at them all.

"Most of them are derelicts," the professor explained, though he was not aware of Lindsay not understanding what he meant. "They sold their bodies to medicine for money. About thirty dollars, I think?"

"Twenty-five," the coroner corrected.

"They got twenty-five dollars just to lie around?" Lindsay asked in astonishment. The chuckles started to get louder and Tyler was frantically trying to get them to stop through glares that had little effect.

"This gentleman here is named Arthur," the professor went on, deciding to overlook Lindsay's ignorance. "Arthur was good enough to die last week of heart failure. And we are fortunate enough today to view his body in its pristine state."

The coroner removed the white sheet to reveal the deceased body. Those who were squeamish started to moan and whimper, really not wanting to be there at that moment. Lindsay had finally figured out what was going on and nearly screamed. She threw herself into Tyler's arms.

"Now here, an incision has been made," the professor noted, pointing out the cut on the body. His finger then came upon the exposed chest area. "The ribs have been sawn off, allowing us to remove the breast plate and really observe the human organs as they exist in their natural state."

The coroner removed the breast plate, revealing the internal organs of the human body. The girls began to squeal and squirm is fright. The sight of which making Duncan chuckle.

"Here we have the human lungs," the professor pointed out. Then he dug a hand covered in a plastic glove to remove an organ for them to see. "And here is the human heart, which you can see is actually located in the center of your chest."

DJ immediately fainted, causing Duncan to burst out laughing. Eva merely rolled her eyes and scoffed at the big man on the floor. Bridgette and Lindsay started to sob in their respective boyfriends' shoulders. Katie watched them do so and sighed.

"The heart is shaped like that?" Owen said in shock. "It looks nothing like the pictures on Valentine's Day cards."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - /_Sobbing._/ "I don't mind having to learn about the internal organs and looking at pictures of them. But to see them up close... I really can't stand it..."

Geoff - "Poor Bridge, man. I rarely see her so upset like she was on the field trip. Fortunately, I don't have to do too much to comfort her. It's like they say, dude. A hug makes everyone feel better."

Duncan - "I'm sure if Geoff needs any comforting from Malibu, he'll want a hug that has him snuggling up against her boobs." /_Chuckles._/ "You can bet Tyler will definitely want the same thing from Lindsay. And I'm sure it'll feel like Heaven. Just ask Zeke."

Katie and Sadie - Katie - /_Sighs in a melancholy manner._/  
Sadie - "What's wrong?"  
Katie - "Seeing Bridgette and Lindsay today at the morgue..."  
Sadie - "Oh my Gosh. They were, like, so freaked out by what they saw."  
Katie - "It's not just that, though."  
Sadie - "What do you mean?"  
Katie - "They were... You know..."  
Sadie - /_Realizes what Katie means._/ "Oh... Well, don't you think now would be a good time to talk to him?"  
Katie - "Maybe..."  
Sadie - "Katie, you need to talk to him, like, right now or you never will."  
Katie - "I know. I'll do it this weekend. I promise."  
Sadie - "Promise?"  
Katie - "Cross my heart, hope to die."  
Sadie - "I'm holding you to that."

Chef Hatchet - "About time the skinny one is gonna reveal who she's crushing! Any longer and I would've been betting way too much money for me to deal with."

Jessica - "If Katie does indeed reveal her crush this weekend, the loser of the bet will be surrendering two hundred bucks to the winner. I'm quite confident I know who it is, but even if I lose it's an amount I'm fine giving up."

* * *

**(Week 3, Day 6 - Thursday)**

"It's been three days since Courtney managed to get her image on every side of every building," Chelsea reminded Heather as they met in the shadows outside the gym. "In that time, she has also been on every student's lips. Having Janet as an opposition was tolerable as it was, but now Courtney has cemented herself in the race. There may be three seats open, but we cannot run on the assumed risk no one else will be a challenge. You need to hamper someone's momentum."

"Who do you want me to attack?" Heather asked. "Janet or Courtney?"

"Need you have to ask?" Chelsea retorted. "Janet would be too challenging and we both know it would be difficult to even attempt to discredit her at anything given her goody-goody nature."

"So you want me to target Courtney," Heather summarized.

"Precisely," Chelsea stated. "Would you have a problem with that?"

"No," Heather answered. There was no hesitation in her voice or in her body language. "In fact, I don't think I would have to dirty my hands all that much to have her drop in public opinion any way."

"Would this involve her dating a juvenile delinquent?" Chelsea asked.

"That's part of it," Heather noted. "Rather, its the two of them at odds with another couple from the show. You did watch the show, am I right?"

"Of course," Chelsea replied.

"Remember how Courtney got booted off?" Heather asked further.

Chelsea nodded, not having to spend too long of a moment to know the answer. "The geek will cause her problems?" she questioned with a raised brow.

"Had you been at last Friday's challenge, you would have seen for yourself how much trouble she could get into over this pathetic grudge of hers," Heather said with a smirk. "Harold is dating LeShawna, the ghetto rapper wannabe. And if you remember from the show, she will easily have a problem with any one who has an attitude against her. This extends to any one who even looks at Harold to her disliking."

"So Courtney and her delinquent boyfriend are in a constant feud with these two?" Chelsea asked.

"It's a full blown war," Heather said. "It takes the slightest thing for them to go off on each other. But that's only half of it. You know how much that a--/**censored**/ Chris McLean likes anything that would bring in ratings? This conflict between the four is such a surefire ratings booster that he will put together challenges for the purpose of exposing it for all to see."

"Not bad," Chelsea mused, nodding her head as she took in all this information. "Challenges are every Friday night, correct?"

"That's right," Heather answered.

"Meaning tomorrow will definitely be our first chance to knock Courtney down a few notches," Chelsea stated.

"All I would have to do is pull a few strings every now and then to make sure the feud keeps rolling," Heather added. "To have fresh on everyone's minds that she absolutely loathes the majority of students at this school would be sympathetic to. This would easily drop her numbers sharply, thereby diminishing her chances to stay in contention with you or even Janet."

"Sounds good," Chelsea said. "You have certainly proven Madison right in enlisting you, Heather. You're sure to be a member of our clique after the election."

"Would I be out of line to ask if this clique of yours has a name?" Heather asked.

"Not at all," Chelsea answered. "We're known as the Dodekatheon."

"The Dodekatheon, eh?" Heather noted. "I imagine that makes Madison Hera and Jeremy Zeus."

"Correct," Chelsea said. "There are more than twelves members, but the twelve with the greatest authority are given an official rank. Mine is obviously Athena since I'm running for office."

"So I see," Heather commented. "Well then, I guess I should be off to secure my place in the Dodekatheon."

"A word of caution, however," Chelsea noted. "If I do not get elected into student council, there will be some serious repercussions for your failure. But I bet you already knew that the moment you agreed to help me."

"Then I guess I better make sure there is little doubt you are to be elected," Heather responded.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "These kids should be thankful that we're not airing these until after their two year stay is over with. They're revealing so much dirt on camera that it's going to take us years to edit all of it down to a presentable form."

* * *

"To Courtney," Duncan announced, raising his plastic cup in the air for a toast. Courtney and Noah followed suit before polishing off their dinner alone in the Marshmallow, away from the others.

"It still amazes me how one simple thing can get the whole student population talking," Courtney stated with glee. "I have been the subject of just about every conversation since those images went up."

"The school officials are just thanks for that they're large sheets of paper that can be removed," Duncan commented. "But even they didn't want to make you Vice President as punishment, the students are sure to elect you into the council."

"I can't imagine anything stopping me now," Courtney proclaimed.

"I can," Noah stated. "Which is why we're here in the Marshmallow. God, I can't believe I'm using that name now."

"Alright, future Chief of Staff," Duncan said. "Spit it out. What could be a problem for princess?"

"Yourselves," Noah answered. He merely ignored the raised brows of confusion he was getting from the others, but went ahead in explaining. "You forget that the two of you are in the middle of a heated battle with Harold and LeShawna."

There was a moment of silence in the air. It was broken shortly by one simple whisper of a word. "Sh--/**censored**/!" Courtney gasped. "I've been so concentrated on the campaign, it never crossed my mind."

"And you know that, if nothing else, Chris is going to display it for all to see as it is a big ratings draw," Noah added. "I'd ask you to find a way to end it now, but I highly doubt you're willing to even speak with them in a civil manner."

"So why should any one care if princess and I have a problem with the geek and the sista with an attitude?" Duncan asked, obviously not comprehending just how serious the situation could be.

"Because the students here have more in common with Harold," Courtney explained, nearly burying her face in her hands with a sigh. "To them, he's the sympathetic one in our fight. Thereby creating a dislike for me, and in turn causing me to lose votes." She then took a moment to let out a frustrated growl. "That traitor is going to cost me me this election! He cost me $100,000 and now he's going to ruin my political future!"

"There are very few options to get Courtney out of this predicament," Noah said. "You guys need to patch things up with Harold and LeShawna as quickly as possible."

"Not a chance in hell," Duncan growled, crossing his arms. "Not with the way LeShawna's been treating us."

"Nor with the way you two have been treating them," Noah pointed out. "Another option would be to avoid them like the plague. The problem with this is that Chris is going to exploit your blood feud whether you guys want him to or not."

"I hate that man," Courtney seethed under her breath.

"The third option would be to make your actions against them justifiable," Noah added. "Given Duncan's track record and the sympathy factor in Harold's favor, it will never work."

"Skip to the end," Duncan grunted.

"Make the other candidates look worse," Noah stated. "Janet is next to impossible to discredit, so we're going to have to concentrate our efforts on targeting Chelsea. Our obstacle is the clique she's a part of. You can bet they will not just sit idly and let us put one of their own down. They're going to come after us, if they haven't planned so already following our first strike."

"Why would they attack me if my first strike was simply to get my face out there?" Courtney asked. "In fact, why would they care if there are three open seats? Wouldn't they be content that this Chelsea would surely be elected to one?

"They don't like competition," Noah replied. "True there are three front runners and three open seats, but that's a chance no serious contender should take. Not even you. It's still early in the race, meaning a dark horse might sneak in at any time to shift the momentum. You should know this by now, Courtney."

"I know, I know," Courtney sighed. "I'm just not used to this kind of challenge in politics. Back in my last school, there was barely any one else who would consider running against me. Mostly because they really didn't care."

"All the more reason why you have me as your campaign manager," Noah stated. "To make sure you don't take for granted your previous accomplishments. And it's because of me that we will be able to hold our own against whatever attacks Chelsea and the clique may throw at us. I need the weekend to add to the list, but I got some dirt on her that will even the playing field."

"Anything you need me to do?" Duncan asked. Instead of receiving a verbal response, he watched Noah zip his lips. Duncan nodded, knowing this meant he had to wait until midnight to hear any plans that would involve him.

"In the meantime, you two need to prepare for tomorrow," Noah said. "We all know there's little to nothing I can do about what Chris will pull, so I suggest figuring some way to make yourselves look less like evil mongrels that want to hurt poor, innocent Harold and his good hearted girlfriend."

"Poor, innocent my ass!" Courtney nearly screamed. "That traitor is going to prevent me from one day becoming--" She was cut off by her entire mouth being covered by Duncan's hand.

"Maybe we should work on our temper, princess," he suggested.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "When it comes to controlling Courtney's temper over what Harold did and may inadvertently do, this may be a problem. Actually no, calling it a problem doesn't even cut the mustard. This is a crisis. A large crisis. In fact, if you got a moment, it's a twelve-story crisis with a magnificent entrance hall, carpeting throughout, 24-hour portage, and an enormous sign on the roof, saying 'This Is a Large Crisis'. A large crisis requires a large plan. Unfortunately, the best I can come up with at the moment involves my needing two pencils and a pair of underpants."

Owen - /_Singing off key._/ "I'm not wearing underwear today. No, I'm not wearing underwear today. Not that you probably care, Much about my underwear. Still, nonetheless, I gotta saaay... That I'm not wearing underwear to-daaaaay!"

Chris - /_Covering his ears in annoyance._/ "I did not need to know that!"

Izzy - /_Still singing to the tune she was singing earlier._/ "Smack it and lick it and rub it and suck it!"

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner

* * *

Man it's been a long while, eh? Got caught up with work and managed to find time to reignite my artistic side. Which you all can check out over at deviantArt under "lordakiyama". Nothing like putting Adobe Illustrator to use by drawing Disney girls in bikinis. Any way, a combination of those and a minor case of writer's block caused this delay. Fortunately, them plot bunnies were not too troublesome. Except when they continue to make me watch **A Bit of Fry and Laurie** endlessly like I have been since Borders did their 50% off DVD sale for a while. I can't ever force myself to turn away even after the fifth hundred viewing. And I'll end up cursing my mom the same way since she's a fan of Hugh Laurie on **House, M.D.** and I promised to expose her to his comedy roots. Fortunately, I found a little help in the form of one of my favorite plays, which I got to see on Easter Sunday. If you haven't heard of **Avenue Q**, you owe it to yourself to watch the clips on YouTube. It's fabulous.

Oh, and **The Kobold Necromancer** did let me know on what his cookie shall be. Once I manage to pull something out of my head, I'll have the one-shot published soon enough.

---

**Next Up:** The Brawl to Settle it All... or not


	11. Week 3, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Eleven

---

**(Week 3, Day 7 - Friday)**

"It's Friday night, and it's time for the greatest show on Earth!" Chris announced from the middle of the stage. Seconds later, the audience erupted into cheers that was getting louder and louder. "Welcome back to Challenge Night, here on Total Drama Academy!" Another round of cheering and applauding was heard. "We are once again at The Marshmallow for another round of chaos and mayhem legally approved by Health Canada."

"I highly doubt that," Noah muttered.

"In this week's challenge, we're getting the bands back together," the handsome host continued. "That's right, ladies and gentlemen. Tonight, it's the Killer Bass vs. the Screaming Gophers!" The cheers from the audience returned until he raised a hand up to silence them. "However, what's in-store for the contestants requires that a little change needs to be made. So will the Screaming Gophers come up front and center, please?"

The eleven students that made up the Screaming Gophers did as they were asked. They received cheers from half the audience as well as applauds from the other half. Cody blushed when he began to hear the squealing of girls calling out his name.

"So, as everyone knows, Izzy won last week's challenge," Chris said. Upon saying this, a series of out of sync chanting of Izzy's name were made by quite a number of male members of the audience. Izzy appealed to them by waving and blowing kissing while cackling in delight. Chris waited for the noise to die down before continuing. "And the big loser was Justin." Any audience reaction to him was immediately overshadowed by a loud raspberry Izzy blew at the male model.

"Aaah!" Justin cried. "You're getting saliva on my face!"

"Good!" Izzy responded. "I hope it burns you like acid! You should be so fortunate I'm not an alien because an alien's saliva would definitely burn your face. Or was it blood that burns when pours out of the body."

"As I was saying," Chris stated after a cough, bringing everyone's attention back to him. "Now then, as noted before, the loser of the previous challenge goes into the following challenge at a disadvantage. However, Justin is on the same team as Izzy, last week's winner. So we need to make a switch."

"Is it really that important for Justin to not be on Izzy's team?" Courtney asked.

"With what I've got planned, it sure does," the handsome host chuckled. "I think it's only fair that Izzy choose who from the Killer Bass will be switching with Justin, having earned the right by winning."

"Zeke!" Izzy immediately proclaimed. She made no notice of Heather making an attempt to make a different suggestion.

"Alright, then it's settled," Chris announced. "For this challenge, Justin will be part of the Killer Bass and Ezekiel will be part of the Screaming Gophers. Join your new teams, boys."

Justin expressed relief by exhaling a sigh as he made his way over to the Killer Bass. Ezekiel swallowed and then nervously walked over to the Screaming Gophers. He had moved barely a foot when he was suddenly snatched by Izzy and found himself being squeezed in a very tight embrace, causing him to blush a bit.

"Don't worry, Zeke!" Izzy cheered. "You're in good hands now!"

Of the other Screaming Gophers, Owen was the only one who shared the same level of enthusiasm as his girlfriend by scooping the both of them in his arms for his own tight hug. The others merely looked on in varying expressions, though most were accepting of the change. The only one who wasn't was Heather. She merely crossed her arms and scoffed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Izzy - "Izzy was worried that the Killer Bass wouldn't treat Zeke right so Izzy felt the need to bring him on over to a team that would make him feel right at home."

Gwen - "There really wasn't a reason for Zeke to be part of the Gophers. Though I guess it's because Izzy is taking that role of watching out for his well being seriously."

Bridgette - /_Sighs._/ "I really wanted to see Zeke prove himself on our team. It would have been nice for his being able to redeem himself for what happened back on the show."

Ezekiel - "Sh'oore is different bein' on the Gophers than on the Bass, eh. Different people, different personalities. It's like moving from one place to an'oother, y'oo kn'oo. A chance to start anew."

* * *

"Phase one of our set up is complete, on to phase two," Chris stated. "Killer Bass. Now that Justin is one your team, you need to decided upon who the leader will be in the next ten seconds. Oh, and Justin cannot be considered because he's a loser. You're ten seconds start now."

"Any objections to me being leader?" Courtney asked her teammates immediately.

"Can't someone else be in charge of this team for a change?" Harold asked.

"Like who?" Duncan asked in an annoyed tone. "You?"

"If it means someone else taking charge, than yeah," Harold replied, simply shrugging at the suggestion.

"Okay, there's not much time to choose," Bridgette stated. "It's between Courtney and Harold. Those in favor of Harold?"

Those who raised their hands for Harold were Katie, Sadie, and Tyler, those they did so nervously. Everyone else either flat out didn't want to raise their hands or were unsure. Nevertheless, there weren't enough hands in support of Harold. He sighed, knowing that Courtney was going to be leading the Killer Bass again.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - /_Sighs._/ "I guess the others didn't really mind who was leader. It sure would be nice if some one else got to be the captain of the Killer Bass for once, though."

Geoff - "It's not that we didn't trust Harold. Far from it, it's a pretty cool bra. It's just that we're going into a challenge blind, you know, and we're used to Courtney being in charge. Not worth taking the chance to switch things up, right?"

Justin - "I wasn't really paying any attention to that whole leadership vote thing. I was just glad to be away from the Psycho Hose Beast, as Heather would call her. She got her revenge, but she still won't let up. I should have known dating her was going to be a big mistake. A hell of a time to not listen to my gut instinct, that's for sure."

Izzy - "Justin's idea of treating a woman is like treating one's plane, uh-huh. I overheard him say that that you should get inside her five times a day and take her to Heaven and back. Or was that my imaginary friend Phil who said that. Hold on, let me ask him." /_Taps the side of her head and looks up._/ "Hey Phil! Were you the one who said that the best way to treat a woman is to get inside her five times a day and take her to Heaven and back?" /_Pauses._/ "Are you sure?" /_Pauses._/ "Okay, if you say so." /_Turns back to the camera._/ "No, it was definitely Justin who said that."

* * *

"Time's up," Chris called. "Who will be running the gig for the Killer Bass?" Courtney raised her hand. "Surprise, surprise. Ms. C.I.T. and Vice Presidential candidate. What a shocker. Guess we'll have to see for ourselves if you guys picked the right leader because she will be in charge of the Killer Bass in a lovely little challenge I like to call 'Musical Showcase'!"

"Don't tell me we gotta sing," Duncan groaned.

"Perhaps," Chris stated. He then lifted up two packets of paper. "I have in my hands two scripts. Each containing a musical performance from a movie. Each one has a different set of performers. The two teams will each perform one of these two scenes in one hour's time before everyone here in the Marshmallow. Myself, Chef Hatchet, and Jessica will judge which team did the best and the audience will decide the individual winner and loser of the challenge based upon our results. As for who decides who gets to perform, that's up to the team captains."

"Who's the captain on our team?" Beth asked.

"Good question," Chris answered. "So good, you get a cookie." Jessica tossed Beth an oatmeal cookie. A section of the audience cheered for this, once again leaving the handsome host with a curious brow raised and scratching his head. "Any way, Killer Bass elected Courtney to be their team captain. Screaming Gophers, you already have a captain. Izzy won the right by being last week's winner." Izzy and Owen cheered along with the out of sync chanting of her name by the many male members of the audience. "And for also being last week's winner, Izzy gets first dibs on which script to perform."

The redhead skipped over to the handsome host and looked over the two scripts. She tapped her chin for a moment before a smile formed on her face. Which then became a grin. Followed by a wicked grin. She then started to giggle. It morphed into a laugh. Then it became a cackle. It transformed into wild laughter as she rubbed her hands together. Finally, a rather sinister sounding maniacal laugh echoed in the Marshmallow. Out of nowhere, dark music played and everyone else began looking around to see where it was coming from.

Izzy's laughter and the music came to a complete and sudden stop when she grabbed the script she wanted, blew a raspberry at Chris, and skipped back to her group. Everyone looked at her in utter bewilderment.

"O-kay..." Chris managed to say. "So... the other script will go to the Killer Bass." He handed the script over to Courtney. "You guys got an hour to prepare. Those who are not performing will be the backstage hands, helping with costumes, make-up, set design, and the lot. Screaming Gophers will go first, followed by Killer Bass. In the meantime, we're gonna treat the audience to some wicked awesome highlights from last season on the stage monitors above."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "Chris asked me to pick out two very odd and obscure musical numbers in movies that I could think of. I haven't really seen too many movies that were musicals, so I had to think outside the box a little for one of the scripts."

Chris - "Better than the choices Chef would've made, let me tell you. As much as I love to watch the students humiliate themselves, even I wouldn't dare torture them to perform the likes of 'Annie' or 'Cats'."

* * *

**(The Screaming Gophers)**

The group watch in bewilderment as Izzy began pushing them about the space in particular positions. Given who they were dealing with, they decided not to question her and allow themselves to be placed about. When she had finally stopped, they all had a good look around at the result of her handy-work. On one side, standing in a row, was Ezekiel, Noah, Trent, Izzy, Gwen, and Beth. At the other hand, Cody and Owen stood behind a box of stage material, Heather was next to a rack of costumes, LeShawna had a make-up kit in her hands, and Lindsay was all alone with nothing next to her or in hand.

"Taking a guess here," LeShawna said, breaking the silence. "But I'm assuming the five of us are the backstage hands for the performance you six will be doing."

"But what am I doing?" Lindsay asked curiously.

"You're gonna help me teach these guys how to dance," Izzy replied happily. Lindsay squealed with excitement when she heard this and began bouncing up and down. Unbeknownst to her, her movements were being followed by the wondering eyes of Cody, Owen, and Ezekiel.

"Why should I be performing?" Noah asked with a scowl on his face.

"Because you would look so cute," Izzy giggled as she handed the other performers copies of the script.

When he snatched his copy, Noah immediately scanned it. Then he looked up at Izzy with narrowed eyes. "You have got to be kidding me," he seethed in frustration.

At the same time, Beth blushed upon reading what it was that she was being a part of. "Y-You mean we... have to perform... th-this...?" she asked sheepishly.

"Oh, I'll perform just so I can watch Noah in a skirt," Gwen laughed after reading the script.

"A skirt?" Ezekiel asked in confusion. "Why does Noah have to wear a skirt?"

"Actually, all six of us are wearing skirts, Zeke," Trent replied. "It's part of the performance. We're doing a can-can."

"Well, as insane as the Psycho Hose Beast is, at least she has the sense to not have me humiliated in such a fashion," Heather commented. "The can-can is such a degrading form of so-called entertainment."

"I take it you know this first hand," Gwen said.

"Bite me, weird goth girl," Heather retorted.

"I... I don't think I can do this..." Beth whimpered. "It's... It's too embarrassing..."

"Don't think of it that way, Beth," Cody said, offering her encouragement. "Think of it as a chance to shine. Instead of Heather or Lindsay up there with Gwen and Izzy, it's you who gets to perform."

Beth thought about it for a moment, tapping her fingers together. "An opportunity for me... to stand out?" she summarized.

"Totally," Cody said with a nod. "And hey, you're not the only one up there dressed the way you will. Trent, Noah, and Zeke are wearing skirts too, so it's not an all girls thing."

Beth began to shyly smile hearing him ease her nerves. "Then I guess it's worth a shot," she said with a slight giggle.

"That's a can-can dance?" Ezekiel noted as Izzy and Lindsay showed him how one was done. "I dunno if I can m'oove my legs that much, eh. I might tire out real quick."

"It'll be lots of fun, Zeke," Izzy stated before grabbing one of the skirts to be worn. "Imagine all those girls out there looking at you thinking you're so cute in these."

This did little to calm the prairie boy down. His cheeks began to blush a shade of pink and he immediately pulled his toque down over his eyes as his entire body shuddered in shyness.

"At least Owen's not gonna wear one," LeShawna quietly said to Gwen.

"Not to mention he's not dancing," Gwen added. "I really don't want to imagine how much gas he'd pass during the whole performance." Both girls gagged at the thought.

"Chris said this was from a movie," Owen said to Cody. "Do you know what movie it's from?"

"Well, the script says it's from a movie called 'Peter's Friends'," Cody replied, scratching his head. "I actually never heard of it."

"Probably one of those low-rent art films," Heather scoffed.

"Think of it as 'The Big Chill' with British people," Noah said. Some of the others looked at him with curious brows raised. "Yeah, I've seen the movie. It's by Kenneth Branagh, the Shakespeare buff."

"It's he the dude who made that long-ass version of Hamlet?" LeShawna asked.

"Yep," Noah answered. "This was one of his non-Shakespeare films. It's quite an interesting watch, actually. You know that guy who plays House, Hugh Laurie? He's in it. Back when his style of acting was more comedic than dramatic."

"So why exactly did you choose this one?" Trent asked Izzy as he went over the script again to memorize his lines.

"Because this one was a can-can and I wanted to do one," Izzy replied with a giggle.

"If she chose this one just because it had a can-can dance, I hate to imagine what the other script was," Noah stated.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Lindsay - "The can-can dance is one of the first dances I learned. I was rather surprised to hear some of the others like Betty feel nervous about doing it because I've always been told that it's one of the best dance a woman could ever do. That and table dancing, pole dancing, and lap dancing, according to my dance instructor."

Owen - "Told me that it was best that I didn't before because she was afraid I was going to bump everyone off the stage. I think she was just being kind and not have to tell me that I was too fat to wear those skirts."

Cody - "Beth was real scared about doing the dance, but I know she has it in her to be really great. She just needed some confidence building and not having Heather and Lindsay participate was the best I could come up with. Still, I think she'll be a great dancer. Maybe even the best." /_Pauses and chuckles nervously at what he has been saying._/

* * *

**(The Killer Bass)**

"'Sweeney Todd'?" Duncan groaned. "Crazy girl left us having to do this?"

"Oh my gosh, I, like, so loved that movie!" Katie squealed. "Even though it was really gory."

"Johnny Depp was, like, such the hottie he made you forget about all the blood that was there," Sadie added. The would-be twins sighed blissfully together.

"There's blood in this?" DJ stated in horror. "Uh-uh. I am not gonna perform in this then."

"Aw, come on, DJ," Katie said. "It's not real. It's only fun and pretend." She gave him a reassuring rub on the arm. This resulted in DJ calming down a bit and he gave her a weak smile.

"You might not have to, dude," Tyler noted. "There's only three parts. Two guys and a girl."

"Yeah, but there's also a lot of guys that are coming in and out to be killed throughout the song," Harold added.

"Sucks to be the guys then," Eva chuckled with a grunt. "Glad I don't have to act or sing. Neither one I can do."

"Although you could convincingly pass for a guy, you know," Duncan remarked. He found himself coming face to face with the fitness buff, but he didn't flinch.

"Care to say that again, punk?" she seethed.

"Yeah," he responded. "You look like a guy."

"Alright, enough!" Courtney cried. "This is getting us nowhere. Let's just pick which three are going to play the main parts and worry about everything else later. Okay?" After a moment's pause, Eva slowly backed away from Duncan while still casting a glare at him. There was some begrudging mutters made before Courtney sighed. "Right. There's one female part in this scene. The Begger Woman. By process of elimination, I'm gonna have give that to you, Bridgette."

"Me?" Bridgette asked in a surprised tone. "But... How did it come down to me?"

"Well, Katie and Sadie would work best doing the costumes and everything," Courtney began to explain. "Eva obviously wants nothing to do with performing, and I'd rather have her help out backstage. As for me... I'm really not that good of a singer. You're so much better than me, it's not even funny."

Bridgette thought about it for a moment then sighed. "Okay..." she said. "I just... haven't done all that much acting before..."

"If Bridge is going to act, then I'll act too!" Geoff proclaimed. "I'll be... What's his name? ... This Anthony dude!"

"You sure about that?" Courtney asked.

"Absolutely!" Geoff replied. He then turned to his girlfriend. "I'll be with you all the way, babe."

"That's so sweet of you to do," Bridgette swooned. Seconds later, the two had locked lips quite passionately.

"Whoever is playing Todd better be able to keep these two separated long enough to do the scene," Duncan noted.

"Any volunteers for Todd, then?" Courtney asked. There was no immediate answer. "None of you guys left want to play Todd?" Still no answer. She sighed. "Then you're going to have to play Todd, Duncan."

"Me?" Duncan cried. "Why the hell me?"

"Because you're the only one who could play the part convincingly," Courtney answered. "I understand if you didn't like the film--"

"I thought it was alright," Duncan stated. "But I sure as hell would not be the best guy to play Todd. I... I really don't like singing. That's all."

"Is there not any one else amongst the guys who would volunteer to play Todd?" Courtney asked. DJ was frantically shaking his head, obviously not wanting any part in the performance. Justin was too busy admiring his reflection in a mirror. Tyler shrugged and was backing away, but tripped on a wire and fell flat on his back. Harold merely picked his nose. Seeing this made Courtney sigh and slap a hand over her forehead. "Harold, that is a really gross thing for you to do right now."

"Well sorry, gosh," Harold groaned, wiping his hand on the side of his pants.

"You see, Duncan?" Courtney said, turning her attention back to the delinquent. "There's no one else."

Duncan rolled his eyes and sighed. "Man, this sucks," he muttered. "Crazy girl probably picked something good."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "I didn't want to play Todd because I didn't really like the story to begin with. Even before the movie was made, I saw a play of it when I was a kid and it really creeped me out. Besides, I don't think I could sing at the right key."

Duncan - "Singing in public is the one thing I am not okay with. I get really agitated and if even the slightest little thing goes wrong I start to lose it. My parents found out the hard way when it resulted in my second trip to juvie."

Tyler - "This really sucks, you know. I was off on a really good roll making final five in that eating contest. But all the challenges since then have not been a benefit to me at all. Izzy went on one of her trips to get at Justin, so I couldn't do anything in the food fight. And now it's an acting and singing challenge, neither of which I could do. Now I know how Eva feels, dude."

* * *

"Ah, the memories," Chris mused after the one-hour highlight clips ended. "It still brings a tear to my eye every time I watch the kids getting themselves into all kinds of trouble during their little camping venture. Any way, it's been an hour and it's time for the same kids to humiliate themselves before you in style. First up is the Screaming Gophers!" Chris exited the stage as the audience gave their applauds.

The curtains pulled open to reveal Ezekiel, Noah, Trent, Izzy, Gwen, and Beth standing in a row shoulder to shoulder. They all had bowler hats on their heads, suit and tie on their upper bodies, and black skirts with multi-colored ruffles along with wearing fishnet stockings. The back of the skirts went as far down as the ankles while the front were as far up as the mid-thigh area. The girls were wearing fake mustaches and all had white make up on, though not so much was needed for Gwen and Beth was without her glasses. They were all also holding black umbrellas in their hands and had black tap dancing shoes.

As they performed, music to the tune of "Orpheus in the Underground" started to play.

Ezekiel: _Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba..._

Noah: _Ooo-ooo, ooo-ooo..._

Trent: _Stand clear of the doors. Mind the gap._

Izzy: _Doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo..._

Gwen: _Doo-doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo-doo doo-doo-doo-doo..._

Beth: _Doo-be-doo..._

All: _Ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba-ba-ba..._

_Let's all go down to Oxford Circus, Past Trafalgar Square, And then from Charing Cross, Right up to Euston, Then change to the Victoria, And then the Piccadilly, Takes us round to Gloucester Road._

Ezekiel: _Kensingt'oon an' N'ootting Hill Gate._

Izzy: _Holland Park and Shepherd's Bush._

Noah: _Ladbroke Grove and Westbourne Park._

Gwen: _And Royal Oak and Paddington._

Trent: _Edgware Road and Baker Street._

Beth: _Great Portland Street and Euston Square._

All: _Barbican and Aldgate East, And change for Tower Hill._

_Fulham Broadway, Heading down for Wimbledon. Wimbledon Park, Now we've crossed the Thames. Back to Earls Court, Right up to Victoria. Change for Green Park, Home in time for tea, To check the map, To find the route to start again._

_So, then after tea, We're off again, We go through Swiss Cottage, Heading northward, On the Jubilee, We change, To the Metropolitan at Finchley Road, Which takes us round, To change at Rayners Lane._

Ezekiel: _S'oonb'oory Hill an' S'oonb'oory T'oon._

Izzy: _Alperton and Acton Town._

Noah: _Chiswick Park and Turnham Green._

Gwen: _Then Stamford Brook and Ravenscourt Park._

Trent: _Hammersmith and Barons Court._

Beth: _West Kensington and Bayswater._

Ezekiel, Izzy, and Noah: _And again,_

Gwen, Trent, and Beth: _Paddington,_

All: _Then change for Maida Vale._

The six turned and flashed their bottoms very swiftly while cheering "Woo!" before continuing.

All: _Willesden Junction, Didn't notice Kensal Green. Watford, High Street, Christ, we've gone too far. Stop at Watford, Back again to Baker Street. King's Cross, Moorgate, Northern Line to Bank._

_Then the escalator link to Monument. We jump the Circle, And we're going round and round._

_Round and round and round, And round and round, And round and round, And round and round and round, And round and round, And round and round and round, And round and round, And round and round and round, And round and round, And round and round and round, And round and round, And round and round and round._

_All change!_

Before the final line, the six had been dancing around the stage in a line before exiting off to the side at the end. There was a quite pause before the audience began to cheer wildly with some laughter mixed in.

"That was fun!" Izzy cried backstage, continuing to do the can-can dance long after the performance was over.

"No it was not," Noah retorted in a miffed tone. "It was embarrassing."

"Oh, stop acting like a child," LeShawna said to the know-it-all as she helped wipe off the make up from everyone's faces before handing them their regular clothes to change back in. "It could have been worse."

"Yes, LeShawna, it could have been worse," Noah responded sarcastically. "They could have attached electrodes to our genitals!"

"Oh, calm down, Noah," Trent said with a chuckle. "It's not like the audience didn't like the performance. If nothing else, the fact that we were all wearing skirts seemed more than enough to appeal their fancy."

"I know you wearing a skirt appeals to my fancy, handsome," Gwen teased her boyfriend.

"The feeling's mutual for you, beautiful," Trent teased back.

"So how am I supposed to take the skirt off again?" Ezekiel asked curiously aloud.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - /_Fanning herself, exhausted._/ "That was... a lot of kicks... we had to do. I like dancing... and all... but that really... wore me out. I'm not... used to that. But it was... a lot of fun! Just like Cody said it would." /_Giggles and snorts._/

Ezekiel - "I'm act'ooally glad to have worn the skirt, eh. All those kicks we had to do, I don't think I c'ood have done them wearin' anythin' else. Alth'oo I c'ood do with'oot the sh'oos."

Owen - /_Giggles._/ "I liked the part where they lift part of their skirts to show more of their legs and then later lift the back up and go 'Woo!' That was really funny because they showed a little of their underwear to the audience."

* * *

"Quite the performance by the Screaming Gophers there," Chris chuckled as he appeared back on stage. "Now it's time for the Killer Bass to make themselves look like idiots to your viewing pleasure!" The handsome host exited the stage once more as the audience applauded and the curtains opened.

The stage was split in three. In one section, Geoff was all alone. Without his trademark cowboy hat and wearing eighteenth century peasant clothing. In another section, Bridgette looked very much like an aged begger. Much of her body covered in one big, dirty article of clothing. At the very end, Duncan wore a barber's clothes and had a wig on to match the Gothic nature. Every now and then, one of the other guys would appear briefly to play victims of Duncan's cruel act and slide off the stage dead.

Of the three on stage, Duncan appeared the most nervous. He really did not want to be up there singing and there was barely any thing around that could help him relax. Not even his passable attempt at singing brought him comfort.

Geoff: _I feel you, Johanna. I feel you, Do they think that walls can hide you? Even now, I'm at your window, I am in the dark beside you, Buried sweetly in your yellow hair, Johanna._

Duncan: _And are you beautiful and pale, With yellow hair, like her? I'd want you beautiful and pale, The way I've dreamed you were, Johanna. And if you're beautiful what then with yellow hair, like wheat, I think we shall not meet again, My little dove, my sweet Johanna._

Geoff: _I'll steal you, Johanna!_

Duncan: _Goodbye, Johanna! You're gone, and yet you're mine, I'm fine, Johanna. I'm fine!_

Geoff: _Johanna._

Bridgette: _Smoke! Smoke! Sign of the devil, Sign of the devil. City on fire! Witch! Witch! Smell it, sir, An evil smell, Every night at the vespers bell, Smoke that comes from the mouth of hell, City on fire! City on fire. Mischief! Mischief! Mischief!_

Duncan: _And if I never hear your voice, My turtledove, my dear, I still have reason to rejoice, The way ahead is clear, Johanna._

Geoff: _I feel you..._

Duncan: _And in that darkness when I'm blind, With what I can't forget..._

Geoff: _Johanna._

Duncan: _It's always morning in my mind, My little pet, my lamb, Johanna. You stay, Johanna..._

Geoff: _Johanna._

Duncan: _The way I've dreamed you are, Oh look, Johanna! A star!_

Geoff: _Buried sweetly in your yellow hair._

Duncan: _A shooting star!_

Bridgette: _There, there, somebody, somebody, look up there. Didn't I tell you? Smell that air. City on fire! Quick, sir, run and tell, Warn them all of the witch's spell, There it is, there it is, the unholy smell, Tell it to the Beadle and police as well, Tell them! Tell them. Help, fiend! City on fire! City on fire. Mischief. Mischief._

While the other Screaming Gophers were getting cleaned up, Heather sneaked over to one side of the stage and hid behind the curtains. She watched as Harold came up to be the final victim of the scene. After looking around to see that no one had noticed her, she looked for anything to get some conflict going.

She then noticed a particular floorboard was quite loose. Loose enough to certainly cause an unsuspecting person stepping on it to lose balance should it shift rather suddenly. Ensuring that Harold would step on the board, she tilted it just enough for him to start tripping. It was enough to cause him to literally be thrust right into Duncan.

Duncan: _And though I'll think of you, I guess, Until the day I die, I think I miss you less and less, As every day goes by, Johanna._

Geoff: _Johanna._

Stressed even more than before, Duncan shoved Harold into the barber's chair in frustration and then rammed the fake shaving handle hard against the other's neck in a choking manner.

Duncan: _And you'd be beautiful and pale, And look too much like her, If only angels could prevail, We'd be the way we were, Johanna._

Geoff: _I feel you, Johanna._

Harold started to have trouble breathing. Seeing this, Courtney knew she had to find some way to drag him off before Duncan caused even more damage despite the song coming to its end. Quietly and trying her best not to look noticeable, she reached over and grabbed Harold by the collar so that she could pull him back.

Duncan: _Wake up, Johanna, Another bright red day, We learn, Johanna, to say, Goodbye._

Geoff: _I'll steal you._

Just as the final notes were played, Duncan shoved Harold very hard. This caused him to literally fly back into Courtney and the two spilled off the stage and Duncan followed. Bridgette and Geoff tried their best to pull the attention to them by bowing to the cheering audience. This was short lived when obvious shouting was heard, silencing everyone so they could hear.

"What is your guys' problem?" Harold yelled in frustration after he had breathed in some oxygen.

"I was trying to help you!" Courtney answered back.

"How is pulling on the back of my collar, thereby choking me further, supposed to help me?" Harold retorted.

"Maybe you shouldn't have tripped in the first place so this whole thing wouldn't have happened!" Duncan yelled. "You knew I was nervous enough up there to sing and you tried to mess me up in clumsy fashion!"

"That didn't give you the right to shove that thing up against my neck, gosh!" Harold yelled.

With a satisfied grin on her face, Heather retreated away from her spot and rejoined the other Screaming Gophers. It wasn't long before the yelling that was going on was loud enough for LeShawna to hear. She wasted no time marching her way over to them, not caring that she was passing through the stage for everyone to see, and inject herself into the argument.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie and Sadie - Katie - "That was, like, so scary."  
Sadie - "I know, right? LeShawna just walked up there and started yelling at Duncan and Courtney."  
Katie - "Oh my gosh, I almost screamed when they got so loud she threatened to punch him.  
Sadie - "I thought she was so gonna do it too."

Eva - "Would've been fun to see some fists flying, given all the heat that was happening between the four of them. But then it's not my fight so I have no say in how it's done."

DJ - "All this yelling and violence is too much for me to take, man. Can't we all just get along?"

* * *

"What wonderful drama we have on display tonight," Chris announced, appearing at the center of the stage with Chef Hatchet and Jessica. On one end of the stage was the Screaming Gophers plus Harold, who was being comforted by LeShawna. On the other end was the Killer Bass with Duncan and Courtney having their arms crossed and their noses turned away from Harold. "Now that we managed to get cooler heads to prevail, we can get some judging done. First, we need to decide which team performed the best. As one of the three judges, I'm actually going to pick the Killer Bass despite the rather improvised finale. That aside, they sang pretty well. Chef, my man?"

Chef snorted. "Liked the Screaming Gophers better," he said. "They completed their act with no problems."

"So that's one for the Gophers and one for the Bass," Chris reviewed to the audience. "That means it's up to the lovely Resident Assistant to cast the deciding vote. Which team won the challenge, Jessica?"

Jessica glanced over at both teams for a moment. Then she formed a grin on her face. "I'll tell you one thing," she began to say. "It takes real men to come up here and look real cute wearing skirts. I pick the Screaming Gophers."

The audience began to cheer with Izzy doing the same before planting a big kiss on Owen. The sight causing Ezekiel to shudder in fear, knowing what happened the last time Izzy won. The other Screaming Gophers lightly applauded, not really sure if they should be all that happy to win based on a performance that was selected by Izzy. LeShawna was not in a celebrating mood as she was more concerned about Harold.

"The Screaming Gophers are this week's winners while the Killer Bass are the losers," Chris announced. "Now it's up to you, our wonderful audience, to decide the ultimate winner and loser of this challenge. Using the voting devices placed under your seats, vote for one member of the Gophers to be chosen as the winner and one member of the Bass to be the loser. Vote now!"

It was some time before the voting was complete and the handsome host was handed a piece of paper with the results. He looked over the figures and chuckled. He then turned to the winning team.

"Screaming Gophers, you guys won the challenge," he stated. "But the overall winner managed to just get one percent more of the vote better than the runner-up. Sorry Zeke. You were close, but no cigar. Because the majority went to... Beth!"

Beth eyes widened in shock as the audience began to cheer. Moments later, she let out a cry of victory of her own as the others on the team congratulated her individually. One in particular was a hug from Cody, which caused her to blush a little.

"As our winner, Beth, you get to chose from one of three prizes from the pile," Chris continued. "And this week, you're actually going to get to chose a school approved pet of your own to keep." The curtain pulled just enough to show three silhouettes on the stage. "Prize number one is a kitty." The spotlight turned on the first silhouette to reveal the little baby cat, causing the audience to coo and awe at the sight. "Prize number two is a puppy." The spotlight turned on the second silhouette to reveal a baby dog, once against causing the audience to coo. "And prize number three... is a piglet."

Even before the spotlight turned on, Beth gasped in delight and immediately ran over to the revealed third prize. The piglet oinked with happiness as Beth gently scooped it up and held it close for a gentle embrace. The sight leaving everyone in a greater sense of awe than before.

"Don't worry folks, we'll find a home for the kitty and the puppy soon enough," Chris stated. "Now then, onto the losers. And this was a whopping landslide. No one even came close in the eyes of the audience. Going into next week's challenge at a great disadvantage will be... Duncan."

"What?" Duncan and Courtney cried together as jeers echoed in the Marshmallow. The two then glared over at Harold, though they found themselves receiving an equal death glare from LeShawna.

"Lots of hate going on," Chris chuckled. "I love it!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Now you see why I don't like singing? The dweeb nearly screws me up, I lose it, and now I'm picked by everyone watching as one big giant loser. Thanks a lot!"

Courtney - "Harold and LeShawna have really pushed my nerves beyond their limits. They were being completely irrational about the whole thing and it made Duncan look so bad that he's picked to go into next week's challenge at a disadvantage. Noah said it would be in my best interest to try to be civil toward them, but how can I when things like this happen!"

Noah - "It is said that civilized man seeks out good and intelligent company so that by learned disclourse he may rise above the savage and closer to god. Ever since being on the show, however, I find myself surrounded by total di--/**censored**/. Looks like I really got my work cut out for me if I'm to help Courtney get elected."

LeShawna - "I really am getting sick and tired of Ms. Snobby-Pants and her lawbreaking boyfriend thinking that they can continue to do whatever they please to my sugar baby. And them trying to do so with me to be nowhere in sight, you just know I am not going to take that lying down."

Harold - "From day one, I've been trying my hardest. To do the best I can in these challenges and make friends with every one around. But no matter what good I do, I get hassled at every turn by Duncan. Courtney encourages or even participates in it for what I did back on the island without allowing me any chance to apologize. Gosh, it annoys me that these people won't let up. It's gotten to the point where I can't take it any more. They've forced me to do some thing I normally wouldn't do. Get back at them in spades."

Heather - "One little string is all it takes. In a moment's time, Courtney will start to lose the popularity she gained over the week and put her at risk of not getting elected. Now all is needed is a dark horse to enter the race."

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner

* * *

I got stuck for a long time figuring out what kind of challenge to put the students through. So I looked back at what's been done so far in _Total Drama Action_ for some ideas. The acting challenge became a highlight and I've been re-watching **Peter's Friends** with my mom recently. The opening scene in that film is utterly silly and embarrassing to those involved that I figured it had to be done in my story. Any one who is a fan of Hugh Laurie, Kenneth Branagh, Stephen Fry, Alphonsia Emmanuel, Emma Thompson, and Imelda Staunton should check this movie out. If nothing else, jump onto YouTube and search "Peter's Friends Underground" to watch the opening bit that I used. In figuring a counter act for the other team to do, I just dropped my finger on **Sweeney Todd** since most of the other musicals I had in my collection didn't seem to quite click in my head.

Still working on that cookie for **The Kobold Necromancer**. But in the meantime, he has finally started publishing the sequel to _Total Drama Comeback_ so check it out.

---

**Next Up:** Katie reveals her crush


	12. Week 4, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twelve

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Last time on Total Drama Academy...

Campaigning for student council was under way and, thanks to Noah's brains and Duncan's skills, Courtney announced herself as a leading candidate in a big way. Unfortunately, that resulted in her getting a bullseye on her back for the clique known as Dodekatheon to strike. As their hired gun, it is Heather's job to secretly sabotage Courtney's chances at getting elected. And what better way to make her look bad than to pull one little string resulting in another heated confrontation between Courtney and Duncan against Harold and LeShawna. With the majority of students at Richmore Academy sympathetic to Harold, this is sure to be a huge roadblock on the campaign trail for Courtney. And it appears Harold has decided to make it worse.

There's still love in the air amongst our students. When not clashing with Courtney and Duncan, Harold and LeShawna look to get their relationship off the ground. Perhaps with a little help from Gwen and Trent. Bridgette and Geoff continue to let their raging hormones get the best of them. Katie is still leaving us in the dark as to who she is crushing on between Noah and DJ. Though her promise to Sadie might mean we'll finally know who soon enough. And then there's Izzy and Owen... I'll just say that it's a good thing the cameras were off when they went past second base. Just thinking about what they did is quite the mental scar that will haunt me, and a few other students, forever.

Challenge Night saw most of the students engage in musical numbers in teams. The aforementioned string pulling by Heather did more than just heat things up. It also resulted in Duncan being voted the loser by our packed audience in the Marshmallow Izzy may have chosen for her team to do the can-can so that Zeke, Noah, and Trent would have to wear skirts, but it was Beth who was the most nervous about doing such a suggestive dance. A pep talk from Cody helped her tough it out, resulting in being declared the winner and becoming the proud owner of a little piglet.

Who is Katie crushing on?

How will Harold get back at Courtney?

Will Bridgette and Geoff ever stop sucking face?

The answers to these questions and more will be revealed in this edition of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

_

* * *

_**(Week 4, Day 1 - Saturday)**

"So you want to be part of our fraternity, huh dude?" the first fraternity brother asked. He appeared to be speaking to Owen, but at the same time he wasn't looking at him. This fact did not register in Owen's brain.

"It would be, like, so cool if we could get another brother, man," the second fraternity brother commented in an off-hand manner. He made an incredibly weak effort to get up from the wooden steps he was lying on. He gave up after two seconds.

"I always wanted to be in a fraternity," Owen stated. "It's so awesome to be with guys just like me."

"That's cool, dude," the first fraternity brother said. "But you have to... uh... pass some tests or something. I think you have to, like, do something first. And then do something else second. And then do one more thing before we let you in."

"You have to pass the scary test first," the second fraternity brother stated. "Then you have to pass the really scary test. And then you have to pass the super scary test. Then you will be a fraternity brother, man."

"Sounds scary," Owen commented, shaking a little in fear. "But I'm up for it. I want to be in a fraternity so bad. And since you're the only fraternity in the school, I want to be in your fraternity"

"Far out, man," the first fraternity brother said. "Okay, so you have to... uh... complete the scary test first."

"The scary test is this," the second fraternity brother said. "See that keg over there?" He made no attempt to point.

"What keg?" Owen asked.

"That keg," the first fraternity brother answered, waving hand in an odd direction. So odd that it didn't even motion to any particular direction at all.

Owen looked around and noticed a keg next to the second fraternity brother's head. "That keg?" he asked, pointing at it.

"What keg?" the second fraternity brother asked.

"That keg," Owen replied.

"What about that keg?" the first fraternity brother asked.

"Is that keg part of the scary test?" Owen asked back.

"What scary test?" the second fraternity brother asked.

"The scary test to be in your fraternity," Owen answered. He apparently did not seemed to be bothered by how ridicules the whole exchange he had with the two boys was.

"Oh, yeah..." the first fraternity brother said in realization. "You have to, like, chug the whole thing in one go, dude."

"Really?" Owen asked. "That's actually pretty cool." He reached over and grabbed the keg. He placed his mouth over the open hole and then tilted back so everything inside would go down his throat. Once the keg was empty, he let out a satisfied gasp. Seconds later, he began to belch. For no reason whatsoever, he sang as he burped in one go. "_O Canada! Our home and native land! True patriot love in all thy sons command!_"

There was a long moment of silence before the fraternity brothers reacted.

"Whoa..." the second fraternity brother said in awe. "That was awesome!"

"That was delicious actually," Owen commented. Then he let out a minor burp. "What was that stuff I drank any way?"

"I dunno, dude," the first fraternity brother replied after a failed attempt at thinking. "Do you?"

"No, man," the second fraternity brother answered, also failing an attempt to think.

"Oh well," the first fraternity brother said, giving up on uncovering the mystery of the liquid that Owen drank. "So, like, you passed the scary test. You now have to pass the really scary test."

"What could be more scary than chugging a whole keg in one go?" Owen asked in a whimper. Once more unable to realize just how pathetic the whole situation was and just how pathetic he was being in believing in it at all.

"I dunno, dude," the first fraternity brother replied, once again failing at an attempt to think. "Do you?"

"Do I what, man?" the second fraternity brother asked back.

"I dunno," the first fraternity brother answered.

"So what's the really scary test?" Owen asked before letting out another belch. He still had not comprehended the ridicules nature of all that was going on to and around him.

"There's a really scary test?" the second fraternity brother asked.

"A really scary test?" the first fraternity brother repeated. "What's that?"

"It's that, like, where he has to have been bitten by a wild animal or something?" the second fraternity brother asked.

"You mean like the bite mark on my shin from my neighbor's dog?" the first fraternity brother asked.

"Or how about the bite mark on my elbow from my sister's cat?" the second fraternity brother asked.

"I got a bite mark," Owen announced proudly. "I was fishing with my grandpa once and I caught a shark. It bit me in the butt. Check it out!" He turns and pulls his pants down to reveal the bite mark.

"Wicked..." the first fraternity brother stated in awe.

"Cool..." the second fraternity brother added.

"So did I pass the really scary test?" Owen asked as he pulled his pants back up and turned to face them.

"That was the really scary test?" the first fraternity brother asked back.

"I guess," the second fraternity brother answered with a shrug.

"Oh, okay," the first fraternity brother said, not really putting much thought into what exactly was being said. "So, like, now you have to pass the super scary test. And you'll be in our fraternity"

"Those were some scary tests, guys," Owen whimpered. "I don't know if I can handle the super scary test." He begins to cry, but then stops himself. "No! Don't cry, Owen. Remember what Izzy said. 'You're the bear. They're the fish-sticks. The bear eats the fish-sticks. So eat them!' Mmmm... fish-sticks..."

"Fish-sticks?" the second fraternity brother asked. "Where?"

"What?" the first fraternity brother asked. "Where what?"

"So what's the super scary test?" Owen asked.

"The super scary test?" the second fraternity brother repeated.

"That's the super scary one," the first fraternity brother replied.

"Oh, yeah..." the second fraternity brother nodded, apparently remembering it somehow. "So you have to, like, pass the super scary test. Are you ready for it, man?"

Owen shook with fear. "I think so..." he managed to utter.

"Okay, dude," the first fraternity brother stated. "You have to spend an hour in a room with a moose in it."

"Noooooooooooooooooooo!" Owen screamed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Raises a curious brow._/ "What the hell kind of fraternity is that?"

Jessica - "You wanna know what's really scary? Those boys somehow manage to maintain at least a 3.5 GPA without having to cheat. It's a miracle they haven't lost a lot of brain cells from the things they do on an hourly basis."

Chef Hatchet - "How is there a fraternity in a high school prep school in the first place?"

* * *

"Um... You sure you know how to... find the door in here?" Cody asked nervously. He looked about the jungle environment of the room and was frantically turning his head at all sides.

"It took getting used to," Beth giggled. "Eventually, Izzy managed to teach the parrots how to point out the door in case someone couldn't find it themselves. All you have to do is ask Macadamia and Hornbeam how Tarzan may follow Jane to England."

"I see..." Cody uttered. He was still bewildered by the whole thing. Therefore, he needed to figure some way to take his mind off the room itself. "So... You sure she won't mind you redecorating your side of the room for your new piglet?"

"She actually was responsible for the redecorating," Beth answered with some more giggling. "You could say that she was just as happy to welcome Asphyxia as I was."

"Asphyxia?" Cody repeated with a raised brow.

"I thought about calling her Elizabeth," Beth explained as she scooped the piglet into her arms. "Izzy suggested calling her a more uncommon name. Bob was her first choice, but we ended up liking Asphyxia."

"Cute name," Cody commented.

"Yes, it is," Beth giggled and snorted. She began tickling the belly of the piglet, who responded with happy squeals. "Such a cute name you have, Asphyxia. Yes, you do."

The redecoration made to the room to accommodate Asphyxia was relatively minor. The seemingly small pig pen had been erected at the foot of Beth's bed. Just wide enough to enclose the space between the bed and the wall. At the present moment, the flooring was covered with hey and soft dirt. There was even a little wooden bin where the food was.

"So, is the redecorating permanent or temporary?" Cody asked.

"Temporary," Beth replied. "When Asphyxia starts to get bigger, we'll have to move her outdoors. I spoke with Chef, Chris, and Jessica about it after the challenge yesterday and they said they would work on putting something together to be her home."

"That's nice," Cody said. "Then I guess you've got everything covered as far as taking care of Asphyxia."

"Yep," Beth responded. "Although I'm sure she wouldn't mind being around another person to play with. After all, isn't that why you dropped by in the first place? To see that she's fitting in?"

"Uh... Yeah," Cody sheepishly replied. "Yeah, of course. Wouldn't mind getting to know her a little more."

"That's very sweet of you, Cody," Beth noted with a giggle.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - "Cody and I have been starting to get along really well as friends. He likes to ask me all the time if I'm doing okay, see if there was anything I needed help with. And now he checks to see if Asphyxia is fitting in. He's such a nice guy."

Cody - /_Nervously taps his fingers together, chuckles shyly, and blushes._/ "Y-Yeah... Getting to know Beth better..."

Trent - "I've noticed Cody has been quietly moping over how the show has been producing a number of couples and he hasn't hooked up with any one yet. It seems like he is getting really antsy about wanting to be in a relationship right away. Maybe he needs to learn some patience. I'm thinking he should befriend a girl, get to know her a little better, and see how much he actually likes her and if she likes him back before moving forward."

Gwen - "I'm sure Cody knows by now that trying to engage in a relationship right away is not the best way to go for him. His trying to do so with me back on the island is enough of a lesson that taught him that."

* * *

"I did it!" Owen proclaimed upon entering the Riker Hall living space. "I'm in a fraternity!"

"Woo hoo!" Izzy cheered, leaping onto her boyfriend's shoulders. "That is so awesome!"

"We should celebrate!" Owen suggested with glee.

"Not a bad idea!" Izzy agreed. She bent over his head, grabbed both of his cheeks with her hands, and then forcefully shoved her lips onto his as they started to make out in a hyper-crazy fashion. A sight that neither Courtney nor Duncan wanted to see as they entered the living space.

"I really don't want to see this," Courtney whimpered as she covered her eyes.

"I don't even want to hear it," Duncan groaned, shutting his eyes closed as tight as he could and using his fingers to plug his ears.

"This sounds like something I'm probably going to regret asking," Gwen sighed as she entered the room, crossed her arms, and shook her head at the sight of the two acting the way they were. "But I'm gonna ask any way. What's with the deal?"

"Izzy and Owen are making out," Courtney replied.

Gwen blinked once. Then continued to stare at them without moving a muscle. "And this is something to whine about because..." she asked with a raised brow.

"If you value your life, you will not ask any further," Duncan stated. "Such horrors are best left undiscovered by the innocence."

"Whatever," Gwen said, rolling her eyes. "Do you at least know why they look like they're competing against Bridgette and Geoff for having the most outrageous tonsil hockey? At the present moment?"

Courtney and Duncan opened their eyes to see what Gwen was talking about. At one end of the living space was Izzy and Owen. Izzy perched on Owen's shoulders and bending over his head to give him an upside down kiss. A very sloppy one. With tongue. On the end end was Bridgette and Geoff. Bridgette was straddling him around the waist. Engaging in their own wet make out session with pleasurable moans and giggles seemingly ever second.

"I actually wouldn't put it past them to try to top Bridgette and Geoff, now that I think about it," Duncan noted.

"As for the real reason," Courtney said, bringing the conversation back to the original subject. "Owen managed to get into some fraternity I don't know the name and frankly really I don't care. Any way, Izzy was all happy when she heard and thus you see them in their current state of bliss."

"Right," Gwen sighed. She then had a good look around at the living space. "You know, it's been a while since I won that first challenge. Think we should start putting some serious thought into actually dressing this place up?"

"We're more focused with my campaign for the time being, Gwen," Courtney replied with a sigh. "I strong suspect that Noah will be right in that what happened yesterday is going to cost me some votes."

"You know, you could try to actually listen to Harold," Gwen suggested. "Perhaps accept his apology. And maybe, just maybe, find it in your heart forgive him a little."

"When hell freezes over," Duncan muttered. Courtney looked as though she was in agreement.

"Worth a shot," Gwen noted with a shrug.

"They're not budging?" a voice asked from behind Gwen. Seconds later, Trent wrapped his arms gently over her chest from behind.

"What are you, trying to be peacemakers or something?" Duncan asked with a raised brow.

"We're just trying to defuse a bomb before it explodes," Trent commented.

"Nice analogy there, Trent," Gwen said, softly nudging him in the stomach with an elbow.

"I tend to pick up things now and then," Trent chuckled, tightening his embrace gently.

"Are y'oo guys gonna start make oot too?" a familiar sounding voice asked. The four looked over to see a nervous looking Ezekiel having entered the room.

"Like something you see, Zeke?" Gwen teased.

Ezekiel started to blush and frantically stumbled over his words, having a hard time coming up with the appropriate response to say. "I... I... I..." he managed to utter.

"Relax, prairie boy," Duncan said. "She's only pulling your leg."

"But... I'm standin' still, eh," Ezekiel said in a confused tone. The other four couldn't help but lightly laugh at the naivety being displayed by him. In reaction, he brought his hands up, ready to pull his toque down over his eyes.

"Greetings, oh slaves of mine," Jessica announced as she entered Riker Hall and the living space. "Jackson and the rest of the boys on the wrestling team want to throw a little get together so that they could better know and humiliate you lot since I'm your R.A. They managed to get hold of some things for tonight and invite you all to a special screening of 'Nature Trail to Hell'. Any one brave enough to take up on their offer?"

There was a wet sounding pop that was heard. Everyone turned to the source, finding it to bee Izzy releasing her lip lock on Owen and looking at Jessica with excitement. Though seeing saliva string hanging from her lip to Owen's caused Courtney and Duncan to gag on sight. "'Nature Trail to Hell'?" she repeated. "Is it in 3D?"

"Knowing the boys, definitely," Jessica replied, somehow not looking repulsed by the way Izzy and Owen appeared.

"Woo hoo!" Izzy cheered, raising her arms up as if in victory.

"Yes!" Owen cried, sharing the same enthusiasm as his girlfriend and throwing his arms up as well. "That's one of my favorite movies, but I've never seen it in 3D before!"

"Severed heads almost falling right in our laps!" Izzy cackled.

"That bloody hatchet coming right at us!" Owen added. "It will be awesome!"

"Sounds like fun," Gwen said. Though she lacked the same enthusiasm at the other two, she sounded like she was up to seeing it. She turned her head to Trent. "What do you say, handsome? Think you can stomach some of the most hideous effects ever in a plotless, campy, grindhouse feature with the added bonus of it being in 3D?"

Trent shrugged. "I've got nothing better to do," he answered. "I don't mind watching with you, beautiful."

"So that's six of us going," Duncan noted.

"What do you mean six?" Courtney asked, practically in terror. "Who said anything about me going? And we still got to work on how to keep my campaign from getting hampered."

"Oh come on, princess," Duncan said with a sly grin, wrapping one arm around his shoulders. "You're only taking a break from the election for just a few hours tonight. It's not like your campaign will come crashing down because of it. Besides, I think you need to get your head cleared if only for a moment."

Courtney wanted to argue. But as she looked at Duncan, the way he was looking back at her, it made it impossible to say no to him. She sulked further into his embrace. "I just don't like scary movies," she pouted.

"That's the spirit," Duncan laughed before receiving a hard punch on his shoulder.

"What's the movie a'boot?" Ezekiel asked curiously.

"It's the most horrifying film to ever hit the screen," Izzy replied in further excitement. "There's a homicidal maniac who finds a possum scout troop and he hacks up two or three in every scene."

"Shhh," Owen whispered, placing a finger over his lips. "Don't spoil the big surprise. You'll reveal the secret ending."

"So you in, Zeke?" Jessica asked.

"It's good, clean family fun, Zeke!" Izzy reasoned. "You won't believe your eyes when you see it!"

Ezekiel thought for a moment and scratched the back of his head. "Um... Oo'kay, I guess," he said with a shrug.

"Woo hoo!" Izzy cheered. "That's seven!"

"How about them?" Jessica asked, nodding her head over to Bridgette and Geoff.

Everyone looked over to take a good look at the two. They were still heavily into their make out session. And seemingly so lost as to not even recognize that there were others in the room with them.

"I doubt we'd be able to even force them out of that spot," Gwen noted.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Trent - "I usually don't watch horror movies. It just seems like each one is recycling one of only a few plots the genre can produce. So there's nothing really new to watch. But if I have to watch one as an excuse to hang out with Gwen, I'm game."

Ezekiel - "I've watched a lotta crappy z'oombie m'oovies before, but I never heard of this one. Maybe I'll like it, eh."

Izzy - "Zihw eseehc stae natas!"

* * *

Katie stood in the cafeteria line for the school chefs. The special made dish of the day was corn beef and cabbage. She normally would want try something else, but the only other option in the cafeteria was the buffet cooked up by Chef Hatchet. So corn beef and cabbage it was.

Sadie had already grabbed her lunch and was waiting at their table. Katie took a little while longer because she had seen her crush walk in. She was nervous enough having to talk to him. She was even more nervous knowing that she had promised Sadie she would talk to him this weekend. She just couldn't figure the best way to approach him so as to begin a conversation.

"Day dreaming there, Katie?" a familiar voice asked her.

Katie nearly squeaked as she looked over, her cheeks blushing, and smiled nervously at the speaker. "Oh!" she cried quietly. "I... I'm really sorry about that, DJ."

"No harm done," DJ said warmly. "So, you hear about some of the guys going to see a movie tonight?"

"Yeah," Katie replied, moving the line along while sheepishly glancing at him from time to time. "Sadie and I don't like horror movies all that much, so we're going to pass."

"I don't like them either," DJ said, slightly squirming at the thought. "They're too violent and disturbing for me. Any way, those of us who are not going are planning to throw a little party in the Marshmallow. Everyone in the school is invited to come. Geoff is looking to get either a band or a disc jockey to play on the stage. You and Sadie gonna show up?"

"T-Totally!" Katie stumbled to reply, both in excitement and embarrassment. At this point, they had gotten their plates and were about to go their separate ways.

"Great," DJ said. "Well, see you guys then. Later."

"Bye," Katie called out as she watch DJ disappear into the sea of humanity that filled the cafeteria. She then sighed and pouted before moving her way to her table. Along the way, she passed the line. She could see that Noah was about to reach his trey. It just so happened that at that moment Chef Hatchet decided to complain about his not having any one lining up on his side.

"What is it with you kids not eating my food, hmmm?" Chef grunted. "My cooking not good enough for you."

"It's not so much that it isn't good enough for us, Chef," Noah stated. "It's that it's not good for us at all. There are amoeba on Saturn who can boil a better egg than you."

"You wanna run that by me again, know-it-all?" Chef asked in a highly annoyed tone. This caught the attention of any one who was within hearing range of the two. They were very interested to see what was going to happen.

"Perhaps I can better explain in a language you'll be able to understand," Noah answered. "Your Fillet Mignon in sauce Bearnaise look like dog-turds in glue."

"How else was I supposed to get the color right?" Chef explained. Some of the students began to gag.

"Your plum-duff tastes like it's a molehill decorated with rabbit-droppings," Noah continued.

"Didn't think you brats would notice, actually," Chef admitted. A couple students started to barf.

"Your cream custard has the texture of cat's vomit," Noah added.

"Your point being, maggot?" Chef demanded.

"Let me put it this way, to better sooth your ego," Noah began to answer. "If you were to serve one of your meals in the Canadian government, you'd be arrested for the greatest mass poisoning since Lucretia Borgia invited five hundred of her close friends around for a wine-and-anthrax party." A number of students slowly backed away and then turned to run for the hills. Noah's descriptions of Chef's food was too much for them to take.

Any one expecting Chef Hatchet to explode in anger found themselves disappointed. Instead, he looked perplexed and raised a confused brow. "Was that supposed to insult me?" he asked.

"Nevermind," Noah sighed, rolling his eyes. He turned, only to find himself facing Katie. Katie smiled nervously and blushed a little in reaction. "Amusing display of miscommunication, was it not?"

"Yeah, yeah, amusing," Katie stumbled to reply, following with a nervous giggle.

Noah raised a curious brow of his own at this, but quickly dismissed it with a quick shake of his head. "I take it you've probably heard that there's two events being planned for us. One by our beloved R.A. in her jock boyfriend treating us to watching some dumb horror movie in 3D. The other being everyone else throwing a party in the Marshmallow."

"Which one are you going to?" Katie asked.

"Neither," Noah replied. "I've got better things to do than subject myself to witnessing my peers making fools of themselves either by screaming in terror at the most awful special effects this side of 'Battlefield Earth' or from making poor attempts at trying to dance. Instead, I'm going to be in my room doing more important things."

"Oh..." Katie responded, sounding disappointed. "I see."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I want to avoid having to engage in another so-called conversation with Chef about why he's the worst cook in the world," Noah remarked.

"Bye," Katie called out as she watched him disappear in the line. She let out a sigh and a pout before finally making her way over to a waiting Sadie at their table.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

DJ - "You know, Geoff and Duncan have been telling me that Katie might have a crush on me. Never really thought about being in a relationship before. And if Katie did like me, I wouldn't mind being with her. She's really nice and positive feeling. In some ways, she kind of reminds me of my mama."

Noah - "Cody and Harold seem to think Katie has a crush on me. Yeah, right. Like any girl from the show would even consider having romantic thoughts about me. And even if Katie did like me, what would be so great about dating her? All the perkiness of hers would be a big headache, no doubt. But the real kicker is that she's literally attached to hip with her would-be twin. Going out with either one would actually mean going out with both. No, thank you."

Katie and Sadie - Katie - /_Sighs._/ "I dunno if I can do this."  
Sadie - "Hello! You promised you'd talk to him."  
Katie - "I know and I am. But I feel like I've been misleading the other one."  
Sadie - "What's so bad about that?"  
Katie - "I'd feel guilty if I made him believe I liked him only to like someone else."  
Sadie - "Oh, that's not a real biggie. You, like, have a remedy for that."  
Katie - "What's that?"  
Sadie - "Me, silly! If he can't go out with you, he can go out with me!"  
Katie - /_Lightens up._/ "Oh, yeah! You're so right!"  
Sadie - "Then we'll both have boyfriends!"  
Katie - "Totally!"  
Together - "Eeeeeeeeeee!"

* * *

"So why am I here again?" Eva asked with a grunt.

"I take it you're not a fan of horror movies since you asked that question," Duncan noted with a raised brow.

"I really don't care what kind of movie it is," Eva responded. "I just want to know why I'm here at all. You guys came at your own accord, but Jessica told me I had to come."

"Think of it as being welcomed to the wrestling team, Eva," Jessica said. "You did tell me the other week you wanted to be on the team. They all went to bat for you to convince the coach to let you join. So now that you're in, you're to join them whenever the whole team does something together. Be it practice, participate in a meet, or just throw together some activity like this one."

"In other words, I wanted it and now I'm getting it," Eva summarized. "Is that what the deal is?"

"Something like that," Jessica replied with a nod. "Besides, would you rather watch a horror movie with a bunch of students who can't dance or find yourself in the middle of a part with a bunch of students who can't dance?"

Eva took only a second to think about the question. "Horror movie sounds find to me," she answered.

"I honestly wouldn't have minded being in that party," Courtney quietly pouted.

"Aww, princess too scared of a cheesy, badly-acted horror movie?" Duncan teased.

"That's part of it," Courtney replied with a hard nudge to his gut. "But think about all the students that will be at the party. It would be a great opportunity to campaign to them."

"Seriously, Courtney," Gwen noted. "Take a break from the campaigning. It's not like the election is tomorrow. After yesterday, you could certainly need a little cooling off."

"I'm surprised you're being so civil to us, Gwen," Duncan commented with a raised brow. "You're really tight with LeShawna. One would figure you would have her back on any issue and therefore refuse to talk to us or lash out at us similar to how she would."

"Push your luck, and I might just do that," Gwen responded. "But to be frank, I'm not going to take sides on this. I'd rather all four of you somehow settle this peacefully before you all end up going nuclear."

"And when that happens, it'll be so cool," Izzy stated with excitement. "Like watching an ant engaging in a life or death struggle with a wolf. Out of this world!" Owen was the only one within listening distance who didn't look back at Izzy and stared at her in bewilderment. She ignored them by playing with the pair of 3D glasses to be used for the movie.

"So y'oo guys are a team, eh?" Ezekiel asked curiously.

"Something like that," Jackson chuckled along with the other members of the team. "We like to think that we all share a liking for wrestling and therefore got bunched up together because of it."

"Um, oo'kay," Ezekiel sheepishly said. "So, can y'oo guys help me with somethin'? Bridgette has been enc'ooragin' me to join a cl'oob. Said it w'ood be good for me, eh. Only h'ooby I have is shootin' a bow an' arrow."

"Good thing you ask now, shorty," Jackson said. "The archery club is accepting new members until Wednesday. Larry over here has a brother with friends in the club. He'll hook you up so you won't have trouble getting in."

"Really?" Ezekiel asked. "Gee, thanks."

"No sweet," Jackson responded with a shrug. "Any of you guys from Riker Hall are welcome to ask us anything."

"Out of fear that a certain girlfriend would rain down hell upon you all if you boys don't?" Jessica teased.

"I figured it was merely out of being the fine, outstanding gentlemen that we were," Jackson chuckled. "But your reason is obviously number one on the list. Your minions are in good hands with us."

"You know, Courtney," Trent said. "If you really can't overcome that campaigning bug of yours, you could always appeal to the wrestling team when the movie is done. If nothing else, you'll be getting votes and taking a break at the same time."

"After the movie?" Courtney whined. "Why not now?"

"Of course not now, princess," Duncan replied. "They just turned the projector on. No talking except for humorous riffing."

"Woo hoo!" Owen cheered. "It's movie time!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - /_Giggles uncharacteristically._/ "Leave it to Trent to be helpful to any and all persons no matter who it is. Be it helping Harold and LeShawna get their relationship moving or suggest to Courtney the positives of having to watch a horror movie at the invite of the school wrestling team. It takes a special case for him not to be so charming. Heather obviously being one of them."

Ezekiel - "I w'oonder why usin' a bow an' arrow is called archery. Baseball has a baseball. An' wrestlin' has guys d'ooin wrestlin'. But I don't get bow an' arrow bein' called archery, eh."

Owen - "Now that I'm in a fraternity, I wonder what I'm supposed to do. The only thing I know about them is that there are toga parties. And they look awesome!"

* * *

At first, Geoff seemed a little disheartened that most of the music that could be found in Richmore Academy were not of the kind that he felt was what a party he was throwing needed. Given the kind of students who attend Richmore, they were less likely to enjoy hip hop, techno, or even the rock rap genres. To his disbelief, they prefer to play big band jazz, music-hall, or the occasional jitterbug style of music. Bridgette convinced him to at least give it a shot for one night. It may not be the type of music he was accustomed to, but as long as everyone was enjoying themselves he would to.

Of course, everyone knew that as of late it really didn't matter what type of music was playing. Geoff's idea of enjoying himself was in a loving embrace of his girlfriend. Engaged in easily one of the longest uninterrupted lip lock any pair of human beings could possibly do. People were sure that this would go on well into next Christmas.

One person who was equally unsure about the music selection the band hired to play performed was LeShawna. She had never heard anything like the type of music played. She didn't want to look disinterested, feeling that Harold might feel dejected since he was apparently enjoying them. She had to admit, though, that some of the songs were kind of catchy.

_"Oh Fujiama,  
You get a mama,  
Then your troubles increase,  
In some pagoda,  
She orders soda,  
Earth-shake milk-shakes, ten cents a piece.  
They kissy and huggy nice,  
By Jingo! It's worth the piece,  
Back in Nagasaki,  
Where the fellers chew tobaccy,  
And the women wicky-wacky,  
Woo."_

"You know, these lyrics don't really make much sense," LeShawna stated as she followed Harold in how one normally dances to such a song. "Some dude's troubles go up when a girl he picks up buys herself a ten-cent milkshake?"

"The lyrics aren't supposed to make sense," Harold explained. "They're just really silly and bawdy. Not to mention the descriptions are hardly related to what the city of Nagasaki really is like. Even by 1930's standards."

"Kinda like most hip hop songs these days," she commented. "You know, I'm kinda surprised none of the others from the show are really complaining all that much. Though sure those who would ended up going to that movie instead."

"Well, Noah is no doubt in his room ignoring everyone," he noted. "Heather left Riker Hall almost immediately. Actually, I find it interesting that Katie and Sadie aren't having problems with this kind of music. As a matter of fact, I haven't see either of them around lately. You'd think they would have been the first ones here after it was announced that Geoff was throwing a party in the Marshmallow tonight. Have you noticed that?"

"I was just thinking the same thing," she noted. "Lemme see if any one else as seen them."

She looked around in search of any of the others from the show. Aside from catching Geoff and Bridgette making out passionately at one side of the stage, she managed to spot Justin making failed attempts at dancing. Of course, none of the dozens of girls surrounding him cared as they all drooled at the sight of him. Since he still had his shirt on, LeShawna managed to turn away in search of any one else. She spotted Cody and Beth having a good time near the entrance of the amphitheater.

"How's about we ask Cody and Beth?" she suggested. After getting a nod from Harold, the two made their way through the dancing crowd and over to Cody and Beth. "Y'all see the would-be twins any where?"

"Not really," Cody replied with a shrug.

"I think Sadie is back in the living space, looking out one of the windows," Beth said. "I never really thought much about it when I first saw her, actually."

"Why would she be looking out a window in the living space?" Harold asked curiously.

"A better question would be why Katie's not with her," Cody added. "Those two are generally inseparable."

"Maybe she's watching Katie do something outside Riker Hall?" Beth suggested.

"Now that I think about it, that may be it," LeShawna stated. "I've been overhearing a couple things between Chef and Jessica about Katie having a crush on someone from the show."

"Really?" Harold asked in surprise.

"I merely asked her about it once and she tried to avoid the subject," LeShawna noted some more. "I didn't really think it was that big of a deal, so I dropped it altogether."

"Any ideas on who Katie has a crush on?" Cody asked. The other three gave him raised brows in response. "What? I'm just curious. Perhaps Katie is meeting with her crush outside."

"It's obviously not one of us then," Harold noted.

"Geoff's engaged in tonsil hockey with Bridgette," LeShawna added. "Justin's over there crowded by a buncha girls. Trent, Owen, Duncan, and Zeke are watching the movie."

"That leaves Noah, Tyler, and DJ," Beth summarized.

"But Tyler left with Lindsay earlier when the type of music playing wasn't to her liking," Cody noted.

"I highly doubt it's Noah," LeShawna commented. "He's far too cynical for any respectable girl to like."

"So we're thinking Katie has a crush on DJ, then," Harold concluded. "I haven't seen DJ around today, so they're probably outside talking together as we speak."

"Who am I talking to?" a voice behind Harold and LeShawna asked curiously.

All four shot their eyes wide open in surprise before slowly looking over to see DJ. He was looking back at them with Bunny in hand and with an interested brow raised.

"Don't tell me," DJ said. "I got something on my face. Is that it? I got something small, yet nasty on my face. I knew I shouldn't have taken up on Justin's offer to try out his skin cream."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - "No way! Katie likes Noah?"

LeShawna - "How could any one possibly see anything likable in him?"

Harold - "She does know that he pretty much dislikes everyone on the show and found her and Sadie to annoying, right?"

Cody - "That's sure to be quite the conversation if she is opening up to him about her feelings."

* * *

Noah stood perfectly still. His eyes having shot wide open and his jaw dropping just a little bit so that his mouth was shaped like a circle. Katie was twirling her hair with a free finger while gently biting the bottom of her lip and giggling nervously. She managed to get him to leave his room saying that she needed help with something. He assumed it was to do with school work. He certainly was not expecting to hear that she had a crush on him.

It had been roughly thirty minutes since she confessed her attraction to him. He had only blinked twice in that time.

"This... This is some sort of prank... Right?" he managed to finally utter.

"No!" Katie gasped in horror, shaking her head frantically. "No, I couldn't possibly prank you. Not you."

"I wouldn't put it past others to try and punk me," Noah muttered quietly. "Especially McLean..." He was still frozen in his fixed expression of overwhelming shock despite what he was saying.

"Honestly, I'm being so honest about this," Katie pleaded. She dared herself to inch just a little bit closer to him as she spoke. "I really do like you. I've liked you for, like, such a long time."

"All this... just because I talked to you... when you first showed up at Playa Des Losers?" Noah stumbled to ask.

"I thought it really sweet and kinda... charming..." Katie giggled. She began to blush and softly dig her toes upon the surface of the ground. She even tilted her head away only to look back over to him shyly.

"What's so charming about that?" he tried to reason in a vain attempt to argue against the thought of possibly being in a relationship. He was failing miserably. "I just wanted you to shut up."

"I know, I was such a mess when I arrived there," Katie explained. She had swayed her head to the other side, still keeping her eyes on him. "It was the first time in, like, ever I had been separated from Sadie. And I didn't know what to do. So when you talked to me my first night there... even though it took an hour... it really helped me get through having to be without her. And that's why I've liked you ever since."

Inside Noah's mind, his thoughts were a total mess. He had absolutely no clue what to think. In fact, for the first time, his heart was suddenly taking control. And his heart telling him to stop beating around the bush and gladly court the girl. It was the first time he had ever found himself in a situation of being in a relationship. The idea of the girl engaging first was the last thing he would have expected. Not to mention the way she was using her body to outright flirt with him. Whether she was doing it on purpose or not, moving her head from one side and then to another while exposing one of her bare shoulders was causing his heart to beat faster than jackhammer.

"You... You really do... like me?" he asked.

Katie's initial response was to go into a giggling fit. She cupped her hands on her cheeks, which were blushing hot pink. It was just then that Noah finally noticed she had been slowly moving toward him and was now inches away from his body. And for the first time he could possibly ever remember, he began to blush himself.

"I've been thinking of silly things, you know," she admitted after several minutes of non-stop giggling. "There's been this one thought in the back of my head. It's, like, I imagine you weren't the only one who wanted me to stop crying. And that you managed to talk with me before Eva so did something horrible to me first."

Noah's cheeks began to burn hotter. "Um..." he managed to utter. His eyes frantically moving from one side to the other as he brought a free hand up to scratch the back of his head nervously.

This act of embarrassment did not go unnoticed.

"You thought that too?" Katie gasped.

"I... I figured it would be a lot better... for everyone's sake... you know... if I talked you from crying... than it would be if... well... Eva forced you to..." Noah struggled to explain. He knew he was doing an absolute terrible job trying to mask the true underlying reason behind his thinking the way he did back then.

She knew it to. Her eyes widened with awe as she gasped in a manner that sounded rather euphoric.

"Almost like... you were... saving me," she concluded.

Noah swallowed pretty hard. His cheeks were not literally on fire. He could feel that her body was getting closer and closer to touching his every passing second. His mind had turned into mush. It didn't help that the sheer beauty of her cuteness was causing all sense of feeling in his body into overload.

So this was what being attracted to someone felt like. Reading about it was one thing. Experiencing it was another.

"I... guess you could say that..." he finally spoke in response to what she had last said.

There was a moment it which it seemed like time had stood perfectly still. Nothing moved. Not wind or gentle breeze was blown. All was completely frozen.

Shortly thereafter, Katie pounced onto him in a sudden flash. Her arms wrapped completely around his neck. Both her feet kicked up in the air. All her weight pressed down upon his chest, causing him to bend back just to support her and keep himself on his feet. Her eyes closed rather gently. And her lips pressed incredibly hard against his while remaining ever so soft. She wanted to savor every sense and taste of the kiss.

If Noah's eyes could have widened any more, they would be the size of basketballs.

But he knew he would be considered a bad liar if he tried to convince any one that he didn't like it. As a matter of fact, he loved it. He sound found himself closing his eyes, gently wrapping his arms around her waist, and returning her kiss in full.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - /_Stares off blissfully in the distance, taking no heed of the camera._/ "... She likes me... Katie likes me..."

Katie and Sadie - Sadie - /_Gasps._/ "You kissed him?"  
Katie - /_Giggles shyly._/ "I couldn't resist. It was, like, such the most romantic thing he did."  
Sadie - "Oh my gosh! You are so head over heels for him!"  
Katie - /_Swoons._/ "He's so dreamy..."  
Sadie - "Eeeeeeeeeee!"

Chef Hatchet - "Noah? The skinny one picked Noah? Over DJ? DJ was the best one of the two! He's built, he's handsome, he's sensitive. Noah's a cynical nerd with as much of an ego-complex as McLean. Why the hell would she pick Noah over DJ?"

Jessica - "How could I have been confident it would've been Noah? You're asking someone who attends a school like Richmore Academy. I have seen for myself that people fall for even the most cynical of persons."

DJ - "I'm not sad that it turned out Katie wasn't crushing on me. It is what it is. I'm happy for the both of them."

Chris - /_Chuckles._/ "Who would have thought? Noah did something caring for a change. And he gets a girlfriend out of it. Maybe he should be caring more often. Who knows how much more rewarded he'll be as a result."

* * *

**(Week 4, Day 2 - Sunday)**

The clock had just changed from 5:59 to 6:00 when Courtney heard knocking at the door. It was not a pair of knocks, as the knocking kept going at a rapid pace. She groaned, knowing that it was Noah outside the door. As she got up, she could hear Bridgette groan herself at the apparent lack of sleep she was experiencing. Courtney swiftly went over to the door and opened it to find Noah standing before her with arms crossed.

"We've got a problem," he simply stated.

"Can't it wait?" she muttered in her sleepy voiced, followed by a yawn.

"No, it can't," he replied quickly. "Not this one. You're campaign is about to be in big trouble."

Courtney simply rolled her eyes and sighed. "Are you that worried that you having a girlfriend now will affect your ability to manage my campaign?" she managed to say through her tired tone.

It was the buzz of Riker Hall upon their return from watching the movie with the school wrestling team. Noah and Katie were a couple. Duncan was laughing rather heartily in disbelief that a girl would actually consider going into a relationship with the cynical know-it-all. She was more surprised that Katie was the one who engaged the relationship in the first place.

"This has nothing to do with my embarking on a relationship for the first time in my life," Noah responded in an annoyed tone.

"You're just nervous, Noah," Courtney explained. "It's something new, something different. It changes how you live your life on a regular basis." The idea of Noah dating was one of the few things any one from the show could fathom. Picking up on Duncan's cue, Courtney had no problem teasing the egghead.

"I'm the youngest of nine, Courtney," Noah noted in annoyance, his eyes narrowing into a scowl. "I think I have a pretty good idea of how to manage my life now that I'm seeing someone."

"Oh, Noah," Courtney teased further. "Being so naive is such a common train of thought when you're in a relationship. There's no shame in feeling nervous about being able to go about your business normally knowing that you now have to devote some time to spend with someone else."

"Believe me, Courtney," Noah commented in irritation. "Eternity in the company of Beelzebub, and all his hellish instruments of death, will be a picnic compared to five minutes with me... and this pencil." He raised up a small little pencil, no bigger than a toothpick in one hand. "Now are you going to hear me out seriously or continue this useless attempt at embarrassing me about my love life while your campaign crashes and burns not in a blaze of glory, but in a blaze of humiliation and mortification."

Courtney rolled her eyes and sighed. "Fine, be that way," she said. "One would figure that you would start cutting back on being a cynic, but I see you have yet to change all that much. So what's so important that you need to wake me up at six in the morning on a Sunday?"

"This," Noah replied, holding up another object in his other hand. "It appears this was being handed out during the party at the Marshmallow last night. You can bet more will be distributed today."

Courtney immediately snatched the object from Noah's hand and stared at it in horror. This was indeed going to be a huge detriment. So much so that she had now dropped from being the favorite to being the least likely to be elected.

For in her hands was a flyer that read simply, "Vote Harold for Vice President."

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner

* * *

I'm slowly working my way towards writing characters I haven't written all that much of since I started the story. The Owen portion at the beginning being an example of that. I just know that the one character I will have loads of trouble writing in the future will be Justin. He such an unappealing character to me that the damned plot bunnies are having a field day in my head in regards to him. I'll eventually figure something out. In the meantime, I will be taking a break from the story to concentrate my efforts on doing more than just one sentence per week on my Harry Potter story and managing to finish that cookie I promised for The Kobold Necromancer without thinking of more ideas for this story and end up abandoning both. As I stated in the previous chapter, check out his sequel to _Total Drama Comeback_ entitled _TDC2: Total Drama Battlegrounds_, if you haven't already. If you're looking for something else to occupy your time, I highly recommend watching **Blackadder**.

---

**Next Up:** Clash of the Titans


	13. Week 4, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Thirteen

---

**(Week 4, Day 2 - Sunday)**

It had been five hours since Courtney locked herself in her room, unceremoniously kicking Bridgette out in the process. The surfer girl quickly got over it upon seeing Noah was not in his room, thereby allowing her some soothing alone time with Geoff. Duncan, however, was getting more and more annoyed having to knock every five minutes with no response. Noah leaned up against the wall, going over a series of notes he held in his hands.

"If you even think about suggesting we make peace with Harold and LeShawna now, you can forget about it, egghead," Duncan muttered quietly. "Even if I wanted to, princess would rip your head off before even considering what it was you said."

"I figured as much once I saw the flyer," Noah noted. "Although the chances of her getting elected now is taking one huge nose-dive. If she doesn't let us in so we can figure how we can fix this mess, she's gonna crash and burn a lot worse than when she was voted off the island."

Just then, the door swung open. Duncan, who was leaning in slightly to knock, found himself losing balance and falling right onto Courtney. Before he could do any thing in reaction, he found himself being thrown against the wall in the room by her. She then forcefully grabbed Noah by the collar and reeled him in. After slamming the door shut, she was up nose to nose with the know-it-all, seething harder and harder with each breath. Noah looked as though he could care less.

"So I'm gonna crash and burn worse than when that moth--/**censored**/ got me kicked off the island?" she questioned. "Alright, smart-ass. You're here now. Fix this!"

"Uh, princess?" Duncan managed to utter upon getting a clear head after what happened to him. "How about putting down--"

"Stuff it, Duncan!" Courtney shrieked.

Duncan was taken aback by what he was witnessing. She was completely losing her mind and even he could do nothing about it. Although his disbelief was more upon Noah appearing utterly nonchalant. This was despite the fact that the egghead was in the middle of an exploding volcano.

"About finished letting off steam yet?" Noah asked.

"You think this is funny, Noah?" Courtney heaved.

"Not at all," Noah responded. "I just want to get started on saving your campaign before it self-destructs."

"And how exactly do you propose we do that, huh?" Courtney demanded.

"We stick to the plan we agreed on Thursday," Noah answered. "Making Chelsea look worse than you do."

"You sure there's no secondary option we can try?" Duncan asked, speaking boldly while Courtney was still in a bad mood.

"The second Harold entered himself into the race, every other option flew out the window," Noah replied. "Mostly because there's now a Chinaman's chance in hell of ever putting differences aside or trying to avoid him as best as possible."

"So we do nothing about Harold?" Courtney summarized, slowly beginning to calm down.

"Nothing that can be helped," Noah pointed out. "You will end up having to confront him in debate, should you both make it that far. Remember, there's still another week of campaigning and then next Sunday you each get drilled by the school officials. As far as I can see, that's the first major hurdle for Harold to face in an attempt to continue with his campaign."

"What happens if he doesn't get through them successfully?" Duncan asked curiously.

"Chances will increase that he'll drop before the debate, but don't count on it as getting the monkey off your back," Noah noted. "He can still do damage to your campaign whether or not he makes it through the officials because now the majority of the student body are going to jump in whichever direction he goes. Be it his own campaign or one of another rival."

"In other words, he'll be a problem no matter what," Courtney deduced.

"Precisely," Noah nodded. "So we should instead concentrate on making some one else look worse. And we agreed that Chelsea is the one to target since Janet's too much of a worshiped goddess to even attempt to smear."

"What is it about that Janet chick any way that makes her so popular?" Duncan inquired.

"Think of her like Justin in the sense that her appearance alone makes boys weak in the knees," Noah answered. "And because she's such a nice and caring person, girls consider her their best friend. Believe me, I could not find a speck of dirt that could be used against her. She's untouchable. Chelsea, on the other hand, we might have a chance against. Our primary concern is the clique she's aligned with."

Courtney sighed, having managed to calm down enough to release her grip on Noah's collar. She then slowly backed up and sat herself on the edge of her bed. "Okay, so we shift gears and go after Chelsea and her clique," she states. "And if I remember our conversation on Thursday correctly, you and Duncan seem to have an idea on how to take her down."

"You can say that," Noah simply replied. He looked over to see Duncan nodding with a slight grin on his face.

"At the very least tell me some thing about what I'm gonna be going up against," Courtney said.

"They call themselves the Dodekatheon," Noah explained. "They parade themselves as the elite students of the school. They pretty much cover every social aspect there is. Sports, politics, education, the works. They only allow in those they believe to be worthy and generally those deemed worthy prove themselves of their position."

"And they have influence over the student body?" Courtney asked with a curious brow raised.

"The kind of influence in which the students don't know they're being brainwashed into thinking the way the Dodekatheon want them to," Noah answered. "Which means for us to take Chelsea down, we have be calculated and precise."

"And I bet you know how to make this whole seemingly crazy and foolhardy plan work," Courtney noted. "Given what needs to be done, one would wonder how much it would cost for your services under normal circumstances."

"A man may fight for many things," Noah stated. "His country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mud wrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock, and a sack of French porn."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "Now I'm really feeling better about Duncan talking me into hiring Noah. He's really got this whole system down. It's any wonder we disregard his genius because of his cynical nature. I'm sure to get elected with him on my side."

Duncan - "My old man told me that you some times have to take the bad with the good. Noah may be an annoying geek with the ego the size of Chris, but his smarts is definitely worth taking all his crap for. Princess can't lose thanks to him."

Chris - /_Raises a curious brow._/ "French porn?"

* * *

**(Week 4, Day 3 - Monday)**

Six-thirty in the morning. A few minor clouds in an otherwise clear sky. The color of the world beginning to come into fruition. The birds were singing. The unfortunate setting for the inevitable to happen. If there was any one in Riker Hall who was still asleep, they were about to be awoken by a tremor the likes of which they had never felt before and probably never want to ever feel again for as long as they lived.

"YOU FU--/**censored**/ TRAITOR!" came the familiar shrieks of one Courtney.

"I'm not a traitor unless I was on your side!" the recognizable voice of Harold retorted. "We have never been on the same side ever since we got here! And Chris putting us on the same team in the last challenge doesn't count because you barely accepted my presence until your precious boyfriend started beating me up for no reason!"

"And running against me is your idea of getting revenge?!" Courtney huffed in return. "Do I have to get another lamp post to bash your pathetic excuse of a skull in again?!"

"Never once have you took the time to even listen to my apology for what happened on the island!" Harold yelled back. "Every time I try to do so, you brush me off as if my being guilty about the whole thing is not for you!"

"So you're going to instead ruin my career just because I'm still pissed off that you got me illegally kicked off the island?!" Courtney screamed. "Why don't you just go ahead and admit that you are going to make it your personal mission to destroy every shred of my life all because Duncan bullied you!"

"I've had it up to here with the both of you pushing me around like I'm Chef's leftovers!" Harold hollered. "I will not let you abuse me any longer! If I have to do this to stand up to the both of you and even the score, then that's exactly what I'm going to do!"

"If any one has any right to react to another's treachery, it's me!" Courtney cried. "I have done nothing to warrant what you did to me then and what you're doing to me now! If I didn't know any better, I'd say that only reason you've been coming after me is because you're not man enough to confront Duncan by yourself! And because of that, YOU'RE A COWARDLY WUSS!"

For perhaps the first time in his life, Harold intentionally attacked a girl.

The second he leaped at Courtney in a fit of rage, those who wanted to see the useless conflict end came rushing in as swiftly as possible to pull them apart. The two had been battling in what could only be described best as nothing more than a cat fight. For all his talk of his ninja skills, Harold resorted to hair pulling and trying to push Courtney's head against the ground as a means of striking her. Courtney, meanwhile, was doing all she could to land a good kick at the region below Harold's belt.

After a few struggling moments, Gwen, Trent, and LeShawna managed to hold back Harold while Bridgette, Geoff, and Noah did the same with Courtney. Neither one of the two had even begun to calm down.

"Let me go!" Courtney screamed. "Let me go! I'm gonna kill him!"

"You're gonna get what's coming to you!" Harold yelled. "I'll make sure of it!"

As this was going on, a number of the others had gathered to one side to watch the whole scene unfold. Eva was calling for the two be let loose. Izzy, perched on Owen's shoulders, was cheering and waving Courtney and Harold flags in each hand. Both Cody and Beth were covering their eyes with their hands, yet spreading their fingers enough to steal some peaks.

Then there was Heather. Keeping herself away from view of the others, a grin was forming on her face as she looked upon all that was happening. She barely had a hand in this and already this was sure to work in her favor. Letting the pieces of the puzzle fall into place was her favorite part of an unfolding plan. Feeling proud of the situation at hand, she quietly made her exit out of Riker Hall and toward homeroom.

She was three steps away from the door when she bumped into some one. She looked up, ready to give the person her piece of mind. Then she recognized who it was she was facing. What shocked her was that she couldn't believe her brain didn't register that, in the middle of all the confusion, he was some how missing from all the action doing down.

"Duncan?" she stated with a curious brow. "Wha-What are you doing out here? ... So early?"

"Huh?" Duncan uttered. He apparently was not aware that he had just bumped into some one. His attention seemingly elsewhere for whatever reason. "Oh, Heather. What am I doing? I was, um, out for an early morning jog. You know, keeping in shape and everything. That what princess says, I think."

"I highly doubt that," Heather stated. "Speaking of your 'princess,' you better get in there as she and Harold were for reals physically trying to kill one another."

"What?!" Duncan cried. "I'm missing from a fight I should be in? Gah! Outta the way, tomboy!"

"Skeeze!" Heather growled as Duncan pushed past her to get into Riker Hall.

Her mood having dampened slightly from her encounter with Duncan, Heather pressed on to get to homeroom. She did not get very far when she noticed that the ground was uncharacteristically whiter than usual. Upon further inspection, she found that sheets of paper had covered every inch of side walk as far as she could see.

Curious, she bent down to pick up a single piece. It was blank on one side. Then she turned to the other side and gasped in horror. She knew right away that every paper on the floor no doubt was the same as the one in her hand.

After a short moment of remaining in a state of shock, she narrowed her eyes and turned slowly back to Riker Hall. She did not have to guess that Duncan was surely responsible for all of this, explaining his absence earlier. What made her wonder, though, was how in the world he managed to get such a compromising picture of Chelsea in the first place.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Fuming._/ "Harold is going to die! Harold! Is going! To die!"

Harold - /_Angry._/ "Courtney has no one else but herself and Duncan to blame for making me do this! All she had to do was hear out my apology, but no! I hope I do manage to humiliate her after all they've done to me!"

LeShawna - /_Sighs._/ "Look, I'm willing to stick by my man through whatever battle he gets himself into. And I sure as well wouldn't mind help him stick it to Miss Prissy-Face. But getting into campaigning and stuff? I dunno. I have a feeling he might be going off in a direction he really shouldn't be going. Still, I got his back, so he won't be in this alone."

Duncan - /_Groans./_ "I just had to start late with... my jogging. Otherwise, I so would've been there for the fight. Would've been an excellent excuse to deck him for laying a finger on my princess. He thinks I've bullied him badly in the past. Wait till he gets a load of me now."

Chef Hatchet - "Any one else notice how my plane seems to be low on gas? How can that be? I just filled her up yesterday."

Gwen - "It's normally not in my character to care about what others do to each other as long as I don't get dragged into their affairs. But this is a little different. These are people I have to be with for two years. And two years of all this bickering and hostility is too much even for me."

Geoff - "Whoa, dude. That's like some heavy heat that's going down between Courtney and Harold, man. It's too intense to have around the place. Messes with all the cool mojo. And poor Bridge is stuck in the middle because she's rooming with Courtney. I don't want the most awesomeness girlfriend ever to get hurt in the crossfire."

Bridgette - "This is really getting out of control. The way Courtney asked me to leave the room the other day when she first found out that Harold was running against her... I had a really bad nightmare about that last night. And I'm scared it's only gonna get worse from here on out."

Trent - "Having been a peacemaker in past situations back home, I usually manage to defuse things before they escalate any where near a danger zone. But Courtney and Harold are well past the boiling point. Even with Gwen by my side, I'm not sure how well we can put an end to the chaos that's brewing."

Eva - /_Puts up a "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over the Denzel Washington Poster and laughs._/ "I'm actually looking forward to Fridays now. Because we're guaranteed Chris is gonna do something that will make Courtney and Harold go at it like they did earlier. Don't get me wrong, I still hate that prick of a host. But there's no denying his ability to take advantage of some thing and exploiting it for all it's worth."

Chris - "It's a crying shame how my hard work at entertaining the masses by making these kids go for the jugular just seems to go under appreciated. Being me is not as easy as it looks, people. It takes a lot of dedication and some serious amount of haircare products. The good kind, tested on exotic animals for quality."

Owen - /_Scratching behind his back and burps._/ "Boy, those sprays Chris wanted me to test on myself kinda itches a little."

* * *

"Not a single one of you should be surprised with my calling you all in here after your classes had finished for the day," Jessica announced. The twenty-two students were gathered in the Marshmallow at the request of their Resident Assistant. They saw that she did not look all too happy.

"You kids beating the holy hell out of each other may be some thing that Chris and the producers have no problem allowing to happen," she continued sternly. "But it is when such acts occur outside of the Friday Night Challenges that I have to draw the line. Now I could care less how you came to be students here, but even I demand that you represent Richmore Academy with a sense of pride and honor.

"It is a privilege for any student to be here, given just how hard it is to even be allowed to get in. The behavior displayed this morning further demonstrates why the school officials were very reluctant in accepting the deal with the producers to let you all study here in the first place. You should consider yourselves extremely lucky that they're letting you, Harold and Courtney, off with a warning through me, otherwise your continued education would have been jeopardized. Let alone allowing the two of you to continue running for a seat in the student council.

"It's one thing for you to act they way you do on the Friday Night Challenges as the school obviously has little control over what Chris and the producers want to do. But when it comes for you to be focused upon your studies and your education, you better damn well be doing exactly that.

"While the school officials seem content with nothing more than a warning, I'm going to take it just a little further. Harold and Courtney, both of you will be suspended from campaigning for the remainder of the week."

"What?!" both students cried.

"But I barely got started--" Harold attempted to reason.

"That will set back plans for Sunday--" Courtney stated at the same time.

"This decision is final," Jessica proclaimed, interrupting and silencing the other two instantly. "Whatever the basis of your pleas were, you should have thought of them before engaging in fisticuffs. Just be glad the school is buzzing about the both of you at all, keeping your chances of staying in the race alive. But if either myself or Mr. Black catch any hint of the two of you attempting to campaign this week, then there will be some serious repercussions.

"Speaking of repercussions, there is one I wish to hand out before I let you misfits carry on with the rest of your evening. While there is no evidence to prove that you had any hand or responsibility in spreading all those copies of the Chelsea picture, you can bet most everyone here strongly believes you to be guilty of it Duncan."

"Can't be punished if there's nothing to prove I did it," Duncan noted rather gleefully.

"You are correct about that," Jessica stated. "Officially. You may not receive a strike from the school, but you can bet I'm not gonna let you weasel your way out of this one without some kind of reprimand. Jackson and the wrestling team require the services of volunteers to be manhandled and thrown about as a means of them learning new techniques and moves whenever they have a training session. I have graciously enlisted you to be this Saturday's oh-so-eager volunteer."

"You did what?" Duncan cried, his eyes popping wide open as he registered exactly what was going to happen to him. "You're forcing me to be the rag doll for your boyfriend and his muscle-head teammates just because you think I had some thing to do with leaking that photo?" He had just finished his sentence when he noticed a slight laugh from behind him. He did not need to turn around to know who it was that was enjoying his misery.

"I look forward to bending you in two, punk," Eva stated with a grin.

"Let this meeting serve of a lesson to the rest of you," Jessica mentioned in closing. "I may have been a fair and generally lenient R.A. ever since you got here. But cross the line, and you will find that I will not be quite a forgiving as some. Play by the rules and every thing will be nice and peachy. Get it? Got it? Good. Meeting adjourned."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer)**

Eva - "Oh yeah! I can't wait to stretch that delinquent from limb to limb. I'm starting to like being at this school. I'm even starting to like some of the people around here. Like Jessica, Jackson, and the rest of the wrestling team."

Courtney - "This is so unfair! I can't campaign for the rest of the week because that fu--/**censored**/ dweeb attacked me? This whole situation is turning into the show all over again!"

Duncan - "You know the thing that really irks me? The plan was all egghead's idea. Under any other circumstances, I'd make the know-it-all suffer. The problem is that he's too vital for princess if she has any shot at getting elected. This really sucks!"

Noah - "We're in the stickiest situation since Sticky the Stick Insect got stuck on a sticky bun."

Harold - /_Sighs._/ "Maybe I'm letting my emotions get the best of me. I announce that I'm running against Courtney and all of a sudden I can't campaign for a week. And we meet with the school officials on Sunday. Things are not turning out as well as I was hoping for. Perhaps I made a mistake with all this..."

Tyler - "When I heard Eva was going to be on the wrestling team, I talked them into letting me at least try out. Even though I broke my left arm in six places, I felt I almost made it."

Lindsay - "When Timmy had a cast over his arm, I was so worried. I've been told that I have nurses training so I stayed with him to make sure he was feeling better."

Tyler - /_Sighs blissfully._/ "I love this place..."

Jessica - "I said all I had to say in the Marshmallow. There's nothing more to discuss."

Chris - "Told you she'd be able to bring the drama. We sure know how to pick 'em, don't we folks."

* * *

**(Week 4, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

"Do you realize how badly hit my image has taken because of this one picture?" Chelsea huffed at Heather, violently waving a copy of the paper in her face. "You're supposed to ensure I get elected with little problems, Heather. This is a very serious problem. More importantly, just how the hell did it get leaked in the first place?"

"I wasn't even aware such a photo existed until yesterday," Heather responded in defense. "And how am I supposed to prevent a leak from happening when I have no clue that such a thing could possibly occur?"

"Didn't you say that you suspect Courtney's punk boyfriend of leaking this?" Chelsea questioned. "Wasn't his past history as a trouble-maker some thing you should have been concerned about in preventing?"

"That trouble-maker talent of his is what's needed to drive Courtney's rivalry with Harold further," Heather replied. "Besides, I highly doubt Duncan would even know any thing about you enough to some how snag the photo in the first place."

"What about Courtney?" Chelsea asked further. "Would she set up some thing like this?"

"Possibly," Heather answered. "But knowing she's more of a public figure than a behind-the-scenes one, I doubt she would want to put some thing together that would be traced back to her."

"Then they must have some one helping them," Chelsea deduced. "From what you're saying, they likely have a student working behind-the-scenes to help her get elected."

"I wouldn't put it past them to hire some one to plan their dirty work," Heather agreed. "I just cannot imagine any one from our group who would help them. Not to mention have the intellect at managing to leak this photo."

"Figure it out and put a stop to them," Chelsea demanded. "Harold entering the race will certainly benefit in decreasing Courtney's chances of getting elected. But know that it could also end up causing me to lose."

"What do you mean?" Heather questioned with a curious brow.

"Play with fire, you have to expect to get burned," Chelsea explained. "Their inferno of a feud could end up spreading to the point that they either cancel each other out in the votes... or get themselves both elected into the student council. Leaving me having to fight for that third seat against Janet. And we both know that no one has a chance against Janet."

"Then I guess I should keep an eye on the flames," Heather stated. "Make sure it doesn't burn too far out of control."

"Make sure of it," Chelsea said before turning away to leave. "And find out who's trying to make me lose."

Heather groaned. This was why politics were never her thing. Too many factors beyond her control could take place at any given moment. Usually happening when least expected. Her plan was going so well that it took one little thing to knock her back several steps. The first thing she had to do was find out who was helping Courtney.

Heather had just turned when she thought she noticed something. Over in the cafeteria, she spotted Noah going through the food line, avoid Chef's buffet as usual. But for a moment, she had the feeling that he might have turned his head in her direction. As though he was watching her. Watching her when she was speaking with Chelsea.

She intentionally bumped him from the side, nearly causing him to fall into his food. Noah turned to glare up at her with narrowed eyes, looking quite annoyed as expected.

"I take it that it's that time of the month for some one," he remarked.

"Like you would know, dweeb," she responded. "You having a girlfriend now, I bet you're discovering all that there is to know about the opposite sex that you've never known before. Like the fact that Katie is a girl."

"Oh my, picking on the nerd," Noah sarcastically cried. "How childish. And you're supposed to be the Queen Bee of the bunch. Seems like you've been losing your edge ever since you got your head shaved."

"Some cynical attitude you're displaying," Heather retorted. "Maybe you being in a relationship has made you gone soft."

"I might as well say it since you're doing a rather horrible job of trying to pry it out of my hands," he said. "You think that I may have looked over my shoulder for ever a slight second to see you engaging in quite a lovely conversation with Chelsea, one of the candidates running against Courtney. Therefore, since I noticed the both of you talking, I must be working for Courtney and thus responsible for getting Duncan to leak the photo."

"Sounds like a confession to me, egghead," she pointed out.

"Even if I deny it, it's not really gonna matter," Noah stated. "You're going to go running off to your new friends at the Dodekatheon and let them know that the egotistical braniac is helping Courtney in her election and is thereby responsible for unlocking their dirty little secrets."

"Just like how you're going to go prancing off to Courtney and telling her that I'm the hired gun to take her down," Heather responded. "When you do, remind her that regardless of what you think you can do, there's still Harold she has to contend with. And when all is said and done, Chelsea will have a seat in the student council and Courtney is going to be on her pampered fanny, crying as her political career comes crashing to the ground."

"Ah, typical master criminal," he said. "Loves the sound of her own voice."

"After the dust clears, you can bet that the Dodekatheon will have a special bullseye painted on your back," she said. "Not even your girlfriend will save you from what they'll have in store for you."

"They do say, Heather, that verbal insults hurt more than physical pain," Noah stated, grabbing some thing from the side. "They are, of course, wrong, as you will soon discover when I stick this toasting fork in your head."

"Hey!" the familiar roar of Chef Hatchet sounded. "Put that toasting fork back where you found it, skinny brains, before I decide to ram it up in you where the sun don't shine!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "Courtney enlisted Noah to help her? This is going to be easier than making Owen eat already chewed gum."

Noah - "Heather is such a terrifying obstacle. About as frightening as a little rabbit with the word 'boo' painted on its nose."

Chef Hatchet - "Them kids don't wanna eat my food, but they want my tools? They gotta another thing coming if they think they can get away with it!"

Chris - "I wonder what else about Noah that Katie finds attractive other than what he did at Playa Des Losers. I sure can't see any thing about him that would cause any girl to melt into a puddle."

* * *

**(Week 4, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

Asphyxia blinked. Sitting in place. Unsure of what to make of two parrots perched on her pig pen fence. Macadamia and Hornbeam cock their heads occasionally, as if studying the new creature in their presence. With Izzy and Beth attending classes, the animals were the only ones left alone in the jungle room.

"E-Scope," Macadamia said suddenly.

"Baggin' a doe," Hornbeam then stated.

Asphyxia looked from bird to bird in confusion. Unsure of exactly what was going on and what they were doing. This would unfortunately go on for quite some time.

"Stomach ate my stomach," Macadamia said.

"Blah-blah-blah, fishcakes," Hornbeam said.

"So over that monster," Macadamia said.

"Explosivo," Hornbeam said.

"Poison ivy spa treatment," Macadamia said.

"Rockin' the fish sticks," Hornbeam said.

"Lochs a risin' up to tha claw," Macadamia said.

"You'll never get me alive," Hornbeam said.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Raises a curious brow._/ "Is it just me, or does it look like those parrots are trying to teach the pig to talk."

Macadamia - "Electronic salad spinner."  
Hornbeam - "Hey, rock!"

Tyler - /_Quickly sits up in disgust._/ "Dude! Who the hell brought birds in here? They crapped all over the chair!"

Izzy - /_Apparently unaware of the condition of the chair._/ "I had Macadamia and Hornbeam special ordered from a rain forest in South America, uh-huh. So they're authentic jungle parrots! At least, that's what the ad in National Geographic said. I think it was the National Geographic. Maybe it was the National Enquirer. But they're so cool and smart. Just like me!"

* * *

**(Week 4, Day 6 - Thursday)**

The studies sessions were becoming less and less about studying. Much of the time was now spent with Katie wrapping virtually her entire self around one of Noah's arm and placing kisses on his cheek every few seconds. Once in a while, she would place her head on his shoulder and let out a long, loving sigh before engaging in a minor giggle fit. This would end shortly when Noah would place a gentle kiss on her cheek, resulting in her to squeal quietly and blush a deep shade of pink before returning to her repeatedly kissing his cheek. Noah would turn his eyes back to the book in his free hand, though he was not really reading. He had not turned the page in over three hours.

In time, Courtney and Duncan came into the living space looking for the egghead. Once they had spotting him in the state that he was in, they took a moment to figure out how to approach him. This lasted for only a second as Duncan immediately walked up to the couple with a grin on his face.

"Now here's some thing you don't see everyday," the punk stated. "Mr. Know-It-All with a girl just all over him."

"Jealous?" Noah asked in retort.

"Yes," Duncan said unconsciously, not realizing what he had immediately done in response. This resulted in a punch to the arm from Courtney, which in turn caused Katie to giggle slightly.

"Look, it's nice that you have a girlfriend and all, Noah," Courtney began after an annoyed sigh. "But we need to work some more on saving my election. I've been feeling very useless with being suspended campaigning and now knowing that Heather is working for the Dodekatheon to undermine my chances. You, on the other hand, have been sitting in here with your new girlfriend smothering you with kiss for hours on end."

"What's wrong with that?" Katie asked in a sweetly tone, though both girls knew that true underlying meaning of her speaking. The two beginning to glare at one another was proof enough of that.

"Every thing you need to study and prepare for Sunday's meeting with the school officials is waiting ever so patiently in Duncan's room," Noah said, breaking the ice that was forming. "I had Ezekiel hold onto it so that you may get a hold of it without any problems. Just go over the packet a few times and you should have no problems staying in the race."

"If you don't mind my asking, what's in the packet?" Courtney questioned.

"Every conceivable question you're going to be asked and the best ways to answer them," Noah replied. "You'll be fine as long as you follow the advice I've written down."

"I'm still trying to figure out how the hell you find the time to do all of this without any side effects," Duncan muttered out loud.

"You learn things when you're the youngest of nine," Noah responded.

He then surprised Katie, turning his head toward her just as she was about to plant another kiss on his cheek. This resulted in their lips coming together. Her eyes shot open for just a second before squealing and melting into their kiss for the moment it lasted. Then they released, she hugged his arm tighter, placed her blushing cheek upon his shoulder, and giggled endlessly.

"You know, I bet we could take a few pointers from them," Duncan mentioned to Courtney with a sly grin on his face.

"Until this election is over, you're not even allowed to so much as kiss me, Duncan," Courtney growled before snatching his wrist and dragging him out of the room. "Now come on, so I can study for Sunday."

"Geez, princess," Duncan could be heard saying as they moved further and further away. "It wouldn't hurt to pull that stick out of your--" He didn't finish as there was a squeezing sound. Followed by him to scream rather violently.

"Why are you helping them with her campaign?" Katie asked curiously. "She has, like, such a short temper. And she gets really mean for very little reason and stuff."

Noah shrugged. "They offered me an intriguing proposition," he replied.

"Well, at least you chose to spend more time with me than with them," Katie said happily.

"I wouldn't have done it any other way, Katie-Kat," Noah said with a grin.

Katie squealed some more before she began to purr so as to go along with her given pet name. After letting out a couple of giggles, she resumed kissing his cheek again and again. This moment of bliss was interrupted suddenly by a pair of high-pitched squeals. The couple looked over to see Lindsay and Sadie standing before them, looking quite excited about seeing the pair together in the state they were in.

"Oh my gosh, you two look so adorable!" Lindsay cheered.

"They're, like, so made for each other!" Sadie added.

"You guys," Katie said, blushing madly and giggling nervously. Noah appeared surprisingly indifferent. "I'm sure Noah would, like, want us to spend our time privately."

"But we came by because Lindsay, like, wanted Noah's help with some thing," Sadie stated. "It'll be a quickie, I promise."

"My help, eh?" Noah said with a curious brow raised. He looked over at Katie, who simply smiled and blushed. More than likely because he was looking at her than any thing else. He then shrugged and turned back to the other two. "Okay, Lindsay, I'll bite. What is it you need my help on."

"It's about one of our class assignments about World War I," the blonde bombshell said. "The way I see it, there was, like, this big war on, right? And, before that, there wasn't a war on, right? So, there must have been, like, a moment when there not being a war on went away, right? And there being a war on came along. So, what I want to know is: How did it, like, get from one case of affairs to the other case of affairs?"

There was a long moment of silence that hung in the air. The Noah finally said something after spending a second to blink. "You mean, 'How did the war start?'" he summarized.

"The war started because of the vile Hun and his villainous empire-building," Sadie stated.

"The British Empire at the time covered a quarter of the globe, while the German Empire consisted of a small sausage factory in Tanganiki," Noah noted. "I hardly think that the British could be entirely absolved of blame on the imperialistic front."

"I heard that it, like, started when some guy called Archie Duke shot an ostrich 'cause he so was hungry," Lindsay said.

Noah took another moment to just stare and blink at the words he was hearing. "I think you mean it started when the Archduke of Austro-Hungary got shot," he pointed out.

"No, there was definitely an ostrich involved," Lindsay said after thinking for a second.

Noah stared at her for a moment before he simply shrugged. "Well, possibly," he said, deciding it was easier to just let her think the way she did. "But the real reason for the whole thing was that it was too much effort not to have a war."

"This is so interesting," Sadie whispered to Katie in an excited tone. "I always loved history. Like, the Battle of Hastings, Henry VIII and his six knives, all that."

Noah ignored what his girlfriend's wanna-be twin was saying. "You see, Lindsay, in order to prevent war in Europe, two super blocs developed: the British, the French, and the Russians on one side, and the Germans and Austro-Hungary on the other," he explained Lindsay. Slowly so that she could take in every word he was saying.. "The idea was to have two vast opposing armies, each acting as the other's deterrent. That way there could never be war."

"But, then there was a sort of war, right?" Lindsay questioned.

"Yes, that's right," Noah replied. "You see, there was a tiny flaw in the plan."

"What was that?" Lindsay asked.

"It was bollocks," Noah answered.

There was another long moment of silence. Noah simply looked at the others, in particular Lindsay. Watching her sift through all the information he had given her so that she could come to a satisfactory conclusion. It remained this way until it finally looked as though she had worked it all out.

"So... the poor old ostrich died for nothing then," Lindsay stated.

Noah blinked and stayed silent for a moment. "Well, that's one way to look at it," he said in response.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a chair covered in bird droppings)**

Cody - "A lot of folks have been going to see Noah lately. Some for advice, some for help. Maybe I should go to him for some advice on... you know... getting a girlfriend. I mean, he's got a girlfriend now himself, so he probably knows a thing or two about..." /_Pauses and sniffs._/ "Whoa. What smells in here?" /_Follows the scent until he sees the condition of the chair and then immediately jumps to his feet._/ "EEEEEWWW!"

Gwen - /_Has replaced chair covered in bird droppings with a cushioned chair._/ "Like I'm going to sit on that chair for the next two years. Any one else before me ever thought about replacing it themselves if they were so upset about it? Those birds are technically in Izzy's possession, so they should have seen some thing crazy like this happening."

Izzy - /_Apparently unaware that the chair has been switched._/ "I heard Chris was originally going to be the narrator on that show 'How I Met Your Mother,' uh-huh. He had recorded all his lines for the first episode and everything until Bob Saget got a hold of the tape, dubbed his voice over, and got it back to CBS before any one knew it was gone. They liked the new voice over so much that they replaced Chris with Bob Saget permanently."

Chris - /_Shaking fist angrily at the camera._/ "Damn you, Bob Saget! Damn you!"

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement

* * *

Okay, I did not expect to be gone this long. I just got caught up with work, Comic Con, and hanging with the family whenever they come down to visit. At the same time, long delays do help me figure certain things out when I was blank in the past. Such was how to present the Courtney and Harold conflict. I certainly took it a lot farther than I probably would have taken it four months ago. The delay also allowed for a suggestion to pop up from one of the reviews. It created a filler scene, sure, but it's a filler scene I didn't mind including. As for the cookie I promised The Kobold Necromancer, I know exactly what to write. I just need to write it. And now having the DVD of the show, even if its the Cartoon Network version, will help me once I get started in tackling it. In the meantime, I rediscovered a great web comic that I love a lot called Norm and Cory. Check it out whenever you get the chance. It's a great read.

---

**Next Up:** The War to Settle the Score... though probably not


	14. Week 4, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Fourteen

---

**(Week 4, Day 7 - Friday)**

"It's Friday night," Chris proclaimed from the middle of the stage. "Did you have any plans made? Well, you better cancel them because there's nothing in the world more exciting than witnessing the carnage and fun that is Challenge Night, here on Total Drama Academy!" The audience erupted into a giant roar of cheering and applauding. "You're favorite twenty-two teens are once again gathered here in the Marshmallow for another round of thrills, chills, and spills that may require one or two pills."

"Your jokes suck, McLean," Duncan muttered.

"At least I'm not a looo-ser like you were last week, Duncan," Chris retorted. Duncan grumbled quietly while some of the fans mocked him over the comment made by the handsome host. "But before we figure out just how screwed you will be this week, we need to get the ball rolling for tonight's challenge. We begin by asking last week's winner to step forward, front and center. And, if I'm not mistaken, that person is none other than Beth."

Beth shyly stepped out, blushing when a modest cheer was sounded for her. She gave out and gentle wave before finding herself standing next to Chris.

"As last week's winner, you will be receiving a pass from competing in this week's challenge," the host announced. A number of the other twenty-one participants let out loud groans in disbelief. Beth merely let out a sigh of relief. "Granted, you won't be eligible for this week's prize and you will have to play a role in the challenge. Nevertheless, you won't be competing. But you won't be alone. This is a team challenge. Five teams of four. Meaning we don't have an even number of students. So some one has to go. And to determine that, we'll be calling upon... The Random Loser Generator!"

"Yipp-ie," Noah stated sarcastically while the audience cheered enthusiastically. He then began to narrate, in his own cynical manner, the wheel being revealed onto the stage. "And the crowd goes wild as Chef labors in pushing some big circle so that Chris could call some one a total loser just because of a spin of the wheel."

Beth took a good look at the wheel and then noticed something that caught her attention. "Chris?" she asked. "How come there's only guys on here?"

"A very good question, Beth," Chris said in reply. "Here's a cookie." At the host's command, Jessica tossed Beth a peanut butter cookie. A good section of the audience cheered for this, causing Chris to raise a confusing brow. "I guess people like to see cookies being thrown out. Any way, the challenge requires the teams of four to be made up of two guys and two girls. Since Beth is a female sitting out, we need a male sitting out to balance out the genders. If you notice, Duncan's mug does not appear on the wheel because we already know he's a looo-ser."

"Keep rubbing it in," Duncan grumbled quietly. "I'll get back at you in spades."

"So go ahead and take a spin at the wheel, Beth," the handsome host continued. "Let's see who will be joining you on the sidelines for this week's challenge."

Beth rubbed her hands and then pulled down with all her might. The wheel began to spin incredibly fast, causing the audience to cheer wildly in anticipation. It was not long before it began slowing down before finally coming to a stop.

"And it will be DJ stepping out of competition this week!" Chris proclaimed. The audience cheered with approval as DJ slowly began to walk up to stand next to Beth. He gave out a shy wave to the crowd along the way. "You might as well consider this a good thing, DJ, because I doubt you could handle what we have in store for the others. But before we find out what delicious fun we're going to be egging these kids with, we need to group the little duckies up."

All of a sudden, completely out of no where, Izzy began to laugh hysterically. Every one else became silent as they turned their attention to the crazy girl. "Now that's funny!" she cried. "Chris laid an egg!" Utter silence remained from the others as Chris raised a brow in confusion. "Well, his joke came off like an egg, and he is kind of an odd duck and so, you know... Duck? Egg? It was funny in my head, and I bet you're all going, 'Oh, could you please just shut up now, Izzy' with the blank stares that you're giving me, so I'm gonna shut up, but only because I want to."

There was no sound for some once Izzy finally stopped talking. Then, almost as if delayed only because his mind was out on lunch, Owen cheered wildly over what had just been said. He was followed by the out of sync chants of Izzy's male fans. This only bewildered the handsome host even further.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Eva - "Just when you think Izzy's completely gone over the deep end, she manages to take insanity to a whole new level. That girl needs a straight-jacket right this second."

DJ - "I'm starting to wonder just what life at home is like for Izzy. Is she always like this? If so, are her family the same way too? I can't imagine them being any different from her in personality."

* * *

"Please don't encourage her," Chris muttered before returning to his normal announcing voice. "As I was saying, let's group up our contestants, shall we? The first team will be... Cody, Katie, Noah, and Sadie!"

While there was a squeal from the female crowd at the mention of Cody's name, even they were drowned out by the high-pitch squealing of the wanna-be twins. They clasped hands and leaped with joy. Yet their moment of togetherness ended just as began when Katie suddenly glomped her egghead boyfriend from behind before he knew it was going to happen. The sight of a girl just all over Noah resulted in numerous whistling and ooing from the audience. Noah merely smirked confidently.

"My, my, what a lovely couple you two make," Chris chuckled. Still finding amusement in the idea that Noah could ever be in a real relationship. "Should make tonight's challenge all the more fun. For me! Our next team will consist of the following... Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, and Owen!"

The boys cheered loudly before scooping up their respective girlfriends to plant big, wet kisses. The crowd went ballistic at the sight of the two couples, who were now apparently engaged in a game which pair could make out the best. An air horn was even sounded amongst the cheering as the action got more and more heated.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Sheesh. It's like those guys really are competing to see who has the best game of tonsil hockey around. Kinda makes your stomach turn a little, really."

* * *

"Might wanna consider breaking out the fire hose for these guys, Chef," Chris said to the big man. Then they watched the tonsil hockey games for another moment. "You should probably do so in thirty seconds."

"Oh my," Beth said breathlessly, having covering her mouth with her fingers. Seeing just how far the kisses were going caused her to lightly blush. "Who would've thought Bridgette could be so... aggressive."

"You think that's aggressive," DJ commented, tilting his head to one side with a raised brow. "Seems to me like Izzy is inventing new methods of French kissing on the spot. And Owen's just taking it."

"I sense a pattern going on here," Gwen mused aloud. Shortly after she spoke, the sound of a fire hose being turned on was made.

"You mean aside from all the loving that's been going on so far?" Duncan questioned with a shrug. He ended up with an elbow to the gut courtesy of Courtney. "Hey! It was a serious question."

"Remember what I said yesterday, Duncan," Courtney hissed. "Not until the election is over." While this happened, the crowd was hooting and hollering as the two passionately kissing couples managed to withstand the might of a fire hose being shot at them.

"Oh, come on, princess," Duncan practically begged. "Suppose they pair us on the same team. We have an obligation to our fans to out perform every other couple in sucking face."

"You disgusting pig!" Courtney quietly shrieked. "Even if I end up unconsciously allowing you to kiss me at the spur of the moment, we're not going as far as Izzy and Owen."

As the conversation was going, the sound of Izzy cackling could be heard with her male fans chanting her name out of sync The kissing contest appeared to finally come to an end, though the crazy redhead was now determined to get back at Chef by chasing after him with a cannon.

"Well..." Chris managed to utter while the chaos on the stage continued. "I think now would be a good time to try and continue to get this challenge rolling properly. The next team will be... Eva, Justin, Lindsay, and Tyler!"

Lindsay squealed with excitement before leaping into her athletic boyfriend's arms and planting quite the kiss of her own. Tyler had no trouble accepting this surprise, though it did cause him to fall back suddenly. But he was lost in the kiss to realize he was in a new position. The crowd cheered as the most good looking couple were making out. Eva merely crossed her arms and grunted at having to be stuck in the middle of all this loving. Justin was not paying attention, rather he was admiring his own reflection in a hand mirror he had.

"Yep, there's definitely a pattern here," Gwen stated.

"What would that be, babe?" Trent asked curiously.

"He's making sure couples are on the same team," she replied.

"You don't sound too happy about that," Trent noted with a bit of concern in his voice.

Gwen sighed and hung her head. "This is Chris we're talking about, sweetie," she said. "He's got something up his sleeve. And I highly doubt it's gonna be healthy for the relationships."

"Hey," Trent said, giving his goth girlfriend reassuring rubs on her arms. "There's nothing to worry about. We've been through enough that we can handle whatever is thrown at us. We'll be just fine, alright?"

Gwen smiled slightly, appreciating that her boyfriend was trying to get her to cheer up. At the same time, cannon fire sounded and it was followed shortly by a loud scream from Chef. Izzy cackled victoriously and bounced about the stage to the roaring cheer of her fans before leaping to perch on her oaf boyfriend's shoulders.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chef Hatchet - /_Smoke coming off body and covered in torn shards of clothing._/ "That girl is going to pay. Mark my words. I'm gonna make her suffer worse than Chris will after I get done with him."

Chris McLean - "Even I know I'm number one on Chef's hit list. But you can bet as the next two years go by, Izzy will be claiming that top spot in no time. She's worse than me in pushing the big guy's buttons. And that's not an easy thing to do."

* * *

"Yo, hold up," LeShawna said. "Not every one is datin' some one else in the group."

"That's true," Harold noted as he thought about it for a moment. "I mean, Cody and Sadie are not dating. At least, as far as I know. And I seriously doubt Justin would date any one."

"Wait a second," Heather said. She looked quite frantic and just a little upset at the same time. "Cody with Sadie. Justin with Eva. DJ and Beth are on the sidelines. That means--"

"Let's just hurry up and announce the next groups before we have any more disruptions," Chris said, taking a moment to glare over at Izzy. She responded by blowing a loud raspberry at him. "The next team will be... Ezekiel, Gwen, Heather, and Trent!"

"You're hooking me up with the sexist home school?!" Heather screamed at Chris.

"Eh?" Ezekiel uttered. Despite not knowing much about relationships, even he knew when such implications were made. Given what Heather was apparently implying, his eyes shot open and a slight shade of pink appeared on his cheeks.

He was not alone in thinking the same thing.

Gwen and Trent began to snicker. Followed by LeShawna and Harold. Then Bridgette and Geoff. Duncan, Courtney, Beth, DJ, Noah, Katie, Sadie, and Cody soon followed. In no time, every one else on stage was snickering. The audience joined in with snickers as well as a number of whistling. This only infuriated Heather even more as she clenched her teeth and her fists. Ezekiel, meanwhile, was still frozen with fear at the thought.

"Hey, you said it," Chris chuckled. "I don't mind playing Cupid every now and then, actually."

"Stuff it, Chris!" Heather demanded.

"Geez, with the way you're reacting, it's almost like you actually have a thing for the little guy," Chris noted gleefully.

"F--/**censored**/ you!" Heather screeched. This only caused every one else to keep laughing, which in turn made her groan in extreme displeasure and slap her hands over her ears.

Ezekiel continued to remain frozen in place and in thought. Bridgette managed to walk over and give the prairie boy a reassuring rub on his toque-covered head.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Ezekiel - /_Blushing_./ "Me? ... Datin'? I'm barely able ta talk ta girls n'oo, and here Heather's goin' on ab'oot us datin'. ... I really don't kn'oo what to think, eh."

Heather - "These people are driving me completely insane. The audacity of me going out with that sexist prairie boy is worse than a joke. It's a crime against all logic and reason."

Bridgette - "I wish Chris would stop picking on Zeke like that. He's trying so hard to get his footing straight now that he's becoming more social and then he's suddenly gets teased so rudely by our so-called host. It's really not fair to him and his self-esteem issues. And the thought of pairing him with Heather?" /_Does a gag motion._/

* * *

"All this excitement, and we haven't even started the challenge yet!" Chris announced. "This is going to be a fun two years! And it's only getting better. Because we all know which four make up the last team."

He was right. The handsome host did not need to name the remaining four competitors. The Marshmallow started to get quiet as all attention was fixed upon the final team. Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna. The division between the two pairs was more than apparent from the get go as they shot death glares at one another. The tension intensified beyond the limits. Now they were being forced together as a team. This was not going to be pleasant.

"Now that we've gotten everyone grouped together, it's time we get this party started!" Chris proclaimed. "This week's challenge is a little diddy I like to call... The Torture Chamber!" A thunderclap echoed loudly from the speakers set throughout the amphitheater. But before any member of the audience could even gasp, Chris head up a finger. As if to say he wasn't finished. "The Torture Chamber... of Love!"

"The WHAT?!" Heather fumed. Her frustrations obviously going bonkers by this point.

"Here's the catch," Chris began to explain. "You've been broken up into teams mostly because we are pitting pairs against pairs. I doubt any one needs a diagram to know who the pairs will be. Pretty sure you people figured it out already, heh heh. But listen carefully, because this is the part of the rules you'll want to know very well.

"It's pairs against pairs, but also boys against boys and girls against girls. At no time will a girl face off with a guy in this challenge. But it's not a simple game, because this called The Torture Chamber of Love for a reason. One member of each pair will be connected to a lie detector. And given this is Total Drama, we have a special kind of lie detector on hand. The other member of each pair will be hooked up to a very special device. The kind in which an electrical discharge will shock the living crap out of you good. For you see, we've set up the wiring so that if the one member of the pair is lying, their partner is going to get shocked. So for your partner's sake, you'll want to be quite truthful."

"I'm not likin' where this is goin'," LeShawna stated.

"You shouldn't like it, but I love it," the handsome host chuckled. "The opposing pair will be asking any ten questions they wish to ask. And I do mean any." The audience let out oohs, knowing they will probably be hearing questions of the scandalous nature. "By doctor's orders, you will be asking ten questions. And remember what I said earlier about boys against boys and girls against girls. If a girl is in the lie detector, the female on the opposing pair is the only one who can ask the questions. And when they're done, they switch off to the boys. By switch off, I mean turns, not positions. Meaning whoever ends up in the lie detector will not have to end up getting shocked. So in short, each pair will only get one chance to ask ten questions against the opposing pair. You all with me so far?"

"I think so," Beth sheepishly said. "But how do you decide who goes in the lie detector and who goes in the electric chair?"

"Excellent question, Beth," Chris replied. "You get another cookie!" As he gave the word for Jessica to toss Beth an oatmeal cookie, another cheer from the audience was heard. Further perplexing the host. "It's only a cookie, people. Sheesh. Any way, it will be you, Beth, and you, DJ, who determine who will be sitting in which chair. And you do so by spinning two very special Random Loser Generator Wheels!"

Jessica appeared behind Beth and DJ with two wheels in each hand. A table also appeared rather suddenly in between them, on which she placed down the wheels upon. Beth examined the wheel next to her, seeing the faces of many of her familiar students. DJ looked at his, seeing that it is a series of images of the same two chairs, one with a computer next to it and another covered with all kinds of electric bolts.

"Beth will be determining who will be sitting in a particular chair and DJ will be determining which chair said person will be in," Chris explained. "Oh, and the order of which team is up will also be determined this way. So let's spin them wheels and see what kind of deal we'll be having!"

Beth took a deep breath and spun her wheel. It rotated around for a moment before slowly down and then finally coming to a stop. The arrow pointed to a picture of Lindsay.

"So the first team up will be Lindsay and Tyler against Eva and Justin!" Chris announced. "Should be a lotta fun. DJ! Why don't we figure out in which chair Lindsay and Justin will be in."

DJ nervously did as he was asked and spun his wheel. It rotated around for a little while. To the point that DJ was very nearly biting his nails with nervousness and anticipation. Soon enough, the wheel slowed and came to a halt. The arrow was pointing at the picture of the chair with a computer next to it.

"My, my, this should be fun," Chris proclaimed. "So it will be that Lindsay and Justin will be sitting in the lie detector chairs while Tyler and Eva may be experiencing some electrical problems for the rest of the night."

"Lemme see if I got this straight," Cody stated curiously. "So Eva will be asking Lindsay ten questions. For every lie Lindsay makes, Tyler gets zapped. Then when they're done, Tyler gets to ask Justin ten questions. If Justin lies, then Eva gets zapped. Did I get the gist of the rules?"

"Pretty much," Chris shrugged. "Although there is a point system I forgot to mention. Personally, I would've let you all just zap yourselves for the hell of it, but the producers want clear winners and losers so that prizes and handicaps can be handed out. So for every truth told, two points will be award to the pair. A lie will not only get your partner zapped, but will also penalize the pair a point. Just to make things much more interesting."

"Suppose there are ties for winners and losers," LeShawna pointed out. "What happens then?"

"We'll let our willing audience vote," Chris replied with a mere shrug. The crowd cheered upon hearing this. "They get a kick out of participating. And they paid to get in here, so we might as well. Should ties come into play, of course."

"I'm starting the miss the days of just the few of us left alone on the island," Duncan grumbled. The sting of the audience picking him as last week's loser still fresh in his mind.

"But time's a wasting!" the handsome host proclaimed. "Let's get our willing first volunteers into their assigned chairs and get this party started. We'll begin with Eva asking Lindsay ten question and then Tyler will ask Justin ten."

Suddenly and without warning, the chairs appeared from beneath the stage floor from under the four named participants. Lindsay and Tyler were positioned to face Eva and Justin respectively. Lindsay and Justin soon found themselves with wired patches on their foreheads, arms, and chest. Tyler and Eva, on the other hand, received metal clamps to hold their wrist and ankles to their chairs. Monitors then popped up from the free sides of Lindsay and Justin. The challenge had begun before they knew it.

"Ask away, Eva," Chris stated.

Eva thought for a moment then grinned upon coming up with a particular question. "Alright, Lindsay," she began. "What's the square root of nine?"

"Uh..." Lindsay uttered as she thought about the question. "Sixteen?"

A bell chimed suddenly.

"That's two points for Lindsay and Tyler," Chris announced. Upon hearing this, Lindsay began to cheer with excitement.

"What the hell!" Eva fumed. "That's not even close to being the right answer!"

"True," Chris agreed. "But to Lindsay, she honestly believed the square root of nine is sixteen. So she wasn't lying. And therefore is considered telling the truth. In other words, your planned strategy of asking her smart questions probably won't work."

"Goddammit!" Eva cursed. She then sighed before thinking about her next question. "Is Tyler your boyfriend?"

"Yeah," Lindsay swooned. The bell chimed, signifying another two pointed awarded.

"Ever have any boyfriends before him?" Eva asked.

"Nope," Lindsay replied. "Don't think so." The bell chimed. Even Tyler was quite surprised to hear this. As a result, he whispered his excitement and mimicked fist-pumping under his present condition.

"So you've never been kissed by a guy before?" Eva asked with a raised brow.

"I guess not," Lindsay answered, thinking hard on the question. A buzzer sounded. Immediately after, Tyler was electrocuted for a good two seconds. The sight of her boyfriend getting zapped caused Lindsay to scream in horror. He was left shuttering in pain for a good moment.

"And Lindsay lies for the first time," Chris announced. "She's three-for-four at the moment, meaning they are currently at five points. A much better result right now than I was expecting, really. Carry on, Eva."

"So who's the lucky fellow you kissed before Tyler?" Eva questioned further. A smirk formed on her face, believing that she found a way to get Lindsay to lose points.

"I mean it," Lindsay pleaded in a panic. "I never kissed a guy before Tyler." The buzzer sounded again. Tyler was shocked again. Lindsay looked even more terrified at what was happening.

"Come on, Lindsay," Eva chuckled. "Just tell the truth, and Tyler won't feel any pain. Did you sleep with this mysterious lover before you ever met Tyler?"

"Why are you being so mean?" Lindsay cried. "I never slept with any one before Tyler!" The bell chimed. Tyler let out a sigh of relief and then latter realized what Lindsay's answer meant. He attempted to fist pump, only to groan in pain upon realizing that he was still strapped down.

"So you kissed a guy, but never slept with him," Eva noted. She sounded quite unhappy that her plan of attack ended up hitting a road block. "Do you even know the identity of the guy you kissed, Lindsay?"

Lindsay thought for a moment. "Does getting kissed on the forehead by my dad count as being kissed as a guy?" she asked. The bell chimed. Tyler let out an even bigger sigh.

Eva, on the other hand, growled in frustration. "You mean the whole time you were lying is because you weren't sure your dad counted as being a guy who kissed you?" she asked.

"Yeah..." Lindsay replied sheepishly. The bell chimed.

"Boy, she's doing a lot better than I would've ever imagined, folks," Chris chuckled. "She's six-for-eight, placing her and Tyler at ten points. They might actually have a shot at winning this thing."

Eva sneered at Lindsay for a moment before finally deciding upon a question. "Are those boobs real?" she asked.

"Of course they're real!" Lindsay replied in an upset tone. Unconsciously, she lifted up her breasts slightly so that she could be seen holding them. "They're not imaginary boobs. They're real. Look, I'm holding them right now. See!" The bell chimed. A number of folks snickered at the manner in which Lindsay handled the question. Tyler was out to lunch as his attention was fixed rather happily upon his girlfriend's chest. He wasn't the only male in the Marshmallow doing so.

Eva rolled her eyes and groaned. Trying to work on Lindsay's stupidity backfired badly. She was out of ideas to use and had one question left to ask. "Ever had plastic surgery?" she asked in a defeated tone.

"I don't think so," Lindsay replied, thinking about the question for a bit. The bell chimed.

"I'm stunned," Chris announced. "Lindsay managed to tell the truth eight times and lie only twice, giving her and Tyler with an extremely impressive score of fourteen. Didn't think you'd guys would be in the double-digits, really. Glad I didn't bet on it. Ain't that right, Chef?" He glanced over off the stage to gleefully watch Chef surrender some money to Jessica. "Now then, it's time for Tyler to question Justin. This should be very interesting."

"Uh..." Tyler uttered, trying to come up with something in his head for a question to ask Justin. As had been proven earlier by his girlfriend, it was a bad idea to ask the hunk questions that he knew nothing about and would therefore answer to what he honestly would believe it to be. "So... Ever have any girlfriends before?"

"Nope," Justin answered unconsciously, not really paying any attention to the fact that he was answering a question. And his ability to be honest would result in whether or not his partner would get zapped. Which was exactly what happened after the buzzer sounded and was the reason behind Eva's loud, frustrated scream.

"What the hell!" Eva snarled in pain. "Every one knows you dated Izzy! She made you admit it weeks ago!"

"That girl does not exist to me!" Justin yelled back in equal distaste.

"Liar, liar, pants on fire!" Izzy hollered. Owen was holding her back so that she could not jump the male model.

"So what was it like dating Izzy?" Tyler asked with a grin.

"I refuse to speak another word on the subject," Justin stated, crossing him arms. The buzzer sounded, resulting in Eva getting shocked again. "There's nothing you can do to make me answer these questions."

"That's a shame, really," Chris chuckled. "Because you and Eva will lose points, she'll get zapped, and when this is all over you can bet your bottom dollar she's going to do every thing in her power to mess up that handsome face of yours, dude."

Justin looked horrified for a moment. Then he quickly tried to put on his most handsome look turning to Eva. "You wouldn't dare mess this up, would you?" he asked. The unfortunate thing for him was that he couldn't take his shirt off.

"Tell the truth or you're a dead man, a--/**censored**/!" Eva fumed. When Eva was violently determined, not even Justin's charms could weaken her. This much every one could tell just by looking at her. And it frightened them all. Including Justin.

"Okay, dude..." Tyler managed to say after many attempts of stopping his snickering. "So, did you actually kiss Izzy?"

Justin opened his mouth, prepared to say no. Then he looked to his side to see the fury of Eva staring holes through him and thought better of denying what happened. "Yes, I kissed Izzy," Justin replied in a defeated tone. The bell chimed. After hearing this, Justin was sure that he could hear some one breathing down his neck. He slowly turned his eyes to see the furious face of the redheaded ex-girlfriend.

Tyler chuckled with great enjoyment. "Dude, did you sleep with her?" he asked with a giant grin.

Justin was now feeling even more uncomfortable than ever. To not tell the truth would mean increasing the chances of facing Eva's wrath. Telling the truth would let every one know the intimate details of his relationship with the psycho hose beast. Regardless of whether or not to tell the truth, Izzy was sure to do some thing crazy.

"Yes..." Justin sighed. The bell chimed. Justin flinched as the spit from Izzy's rather loud raspberry was hitting his ear. "Some body get this lunatic away from me!"

"Did you contract any diseases?" Tyler teased.

"I feel like I have already," Justin complained. The buzzer sounded and Eva got zapped. "Hey, I didn't say specifically that I got diseases. I just said I wished I did!"

"I'm gonna give you one when this is over, you bastard!" Eva growled.

"This is so awesome!" Chris chuckled. "Five questions in and we know for sure Lindsay and Tyler won't be the losers of this challenge. Who would've seen that coming?"

"How dare you let that f--/**censored**/ idiot of a blonde get the better of us!" Eva fumed. "I should kick your ass right now!"

"Just hurry up and ask the questions, man!" Justin begged Tyler in a panic.

"M'kay," Tyler chuckled. "Are you athletic? Do you like puppies? Ever steal from a baby? Is your body insured?"

"Somewhat athletic," Justin began to replay. The bell chimed after the first sentence. "Yes, I adore puppies." The bell chimed again. "Never stole from a baby." The bell chimed once again. "Of course my body is insured. It costs thousands." The bell chimed for the last time. "Now will some one please get me the hell out of here!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Justin - "Just had to date the psycho hose beast. Should've listened to my instincts, but no. Her family was loaded and had connections that would get me a modeling contract."

Izzy - "Am I through getting even with Justin? Not by a long shot!" /_Puts on camouflage hat with deer antlers on her head and a red nose._/ "This is no laughing matter! I will not rest until he has paid for every last second of his crimes!"

Owen - "Justin slept with Izzy? That two-timing jerk! How could he do that to me?" /_Starts wailing._/

* * *

"And there you go, ladies and gentlemen!" Chris announced. As he spoke, the four chairs tilted back rather quickly and dumped the participants onto the floor. "Lindsay and Tyler are safe as can be, sitting delightfully with fourteen points. Eva and Justin, on the other hand, are sweating bullets with eleven points. Will they survive being labeled the looo-sers? Let's find out by seeing which team will go second! Beth, if you will please."

Beth lightly spun the wheel, giving it a nice little spin without it going too fast. When it slowed and came to a stop, the arrow was pointing at a picture of Geoff.

"Next up is Geoff and Bridgette against Owen and Izzy!" Chris announced.

"Woo hoo!" Geoff cheered. "We're so taking this, babe!"

"Um, sweetie," Bridgette said sheepishly. "You do realize that one of us is going to end up in that electric chair, right? Meaning one of us is likely to get zapped tonight. And in order to prevent so, we might end up having to admit things we don't wanna admit in public. Like... the details of our relationship."

"Why would we wanna do that?" Geoff asked curiously. As this was happening, DJ was instructed to spin his wheel to determine which chair Geoff would be in.

"Because if I end up in the lie detector chair, Izzy will be asking me the questions," Bridgette answered. "And you know how much she really likes knowing the full details of things better left unknown publicly."

"But if you get the electric chair, you'll get zapped," Geoff noted, starting to finally make sense of what the challenge was setting out to do. "And I don't want the most awesomess girl in the world to get zapped because I said something stupid."

"That's very romantic of you, Geoff," Bridgette said. "But now do you see why this is a challenge you shouldn't get all excited about? It's likely hurt either one of us both physically and emotionally."

"Well, this will indeed be fun," Chris announced suddenly. "Geoff gets the electric chair. Which means Bridgette and Owen will be in the lie detector chairs while Geoff will be sharing with Izzy. I so cannot wait to see this one, lemme tell you."

"He's just hoping Izzy gets zapped," Noah noted to Katie and any one else around willing to listen while the four announced participants find themselves suddenly strapped to their assigned chairs. "It's too bad for his ego that she actually doesn't mind a thousand volts coursing through her body."

"Every one all set and ready to go?" Chris asked. "If not, too bad. Let's get this party rocking! Izzy, ask away!"

"Ohmygod, there's, like, a lot of questions I been meaning to ask about you and Geoff, uh huh," Izzy immediately said to Bridgette. "Questions like, what's your favorite form of kissing you guys like to do?"

Bridgette was extremely hesitant to answer. Questions about her relationship with Geoff were generally a private manner, no matter how often they've been seen making out in public. The idea of having to open up about it really made her uncomfortable. All the more reason she was not happy to be participating in this challenge. Because if she denied any thing, Geoff was going to get fried. And that was some thing she could not cope with.

"Um..." she managed to utterly before finally giving in. "I like to let him... suck my tongue a little." The bell chimed. Bridgette tried to shy away while her cheeks blushed a deep shade of pink. Particularly from folks in the crowd whistling. Geoff was about to join in on the cheering until he saw how uncomfortable his girlfriend looked.

"That sounds so sexy," Izzy stated. "Does he get to fondle your boobs?"

Bridgette was slowly shrinking further and further into her seat. "... Yes..." she replied sheepishly. The bell chimed. Male members of the audience howled with delight, further deepening the shade of pink on Bridgette's cheeks. "Izzy, I would really appreciate it if you didn't ask any more... personal questions."

"How come?" Izzy questioned.

"Because I'm really not comfortable making public about my relationship with Geoff," Bridgette replied. The bell chimed, which caught both girls off guard for a moment.

"Does that mean the meatloaf is done cooking?" Izzy asked.

"No, Izzy," Bridgette answered. "It just means I told a truthful answer to a question you asked." The bell chimed again. "See? That means I've successfully answered four of your questions."

"I asked four questions?" Izzy noted. "Oh wow. I only remember asking two. I must be, like, doubling them off or something. That's pretty cool actually. Getting two for the price of one!"

Bridgette stared at Izzy for a moment, still unsure of what to make of the crazy girl. "Sure, Izzy," she said. "Asking two questions means you actually asked four." The buzzer sounded suddenly and Geoff found himself getting zapped. Much to Bridgette's horror as she screamed. "I didn't hear her ask a fifth question!"

"Technically she did," Chris explained. "Question, 'I asked four questions?' Not to mention your answer was quite condescending, and that's generally detected as a lie. So you and Geoff are currently at seven points with five questions left to go."

"Dude, that zap was harshness!" Geoff managed to utter once he caught his breath. "How many volts do you use?"

"We'd rather not say," Chris replied. "Would make the game less fun."

"You are so mean, Chris!" Bridgette complained.

"I try," Chris retorted gleefully.

"Hey Bridgette," Izzy said suddenly in a rather excited tone. "Did you know that Charles Nelson Reilly won the Tour de France with two flat tires and a missing chain?"

Bridgette stared at Izzy for a good long moment. The surfer girl hoped that one day she would be able to figure out the crazy girl sitting before her. Today was not going to be it. "Um... I don't even know who Charles Nelson Reilly is..." she answered. The bell chimed, much to her and Geoff's relief.

"Aw, poo," Izzy pouted. "He's very cool, you know. Did you know he ran a four minute mile blindfolded with an engine block strapped to his back?"

"... I'm afraid I still don't know who he is, Izzy..." Bridgette managed to say. The bell chimed.

"He also has a third nipple on the back of his neck," Izzy noted after giving it some thought. "I wish I had a third nipple on the back of my neck. Do you have one, Bridgette?"

"Izzy, that's... really gross," Bridgette stated. "Of course I don't have one." The bell chimed.

"Does Geoff?" Izzy asked.

"He doesn't have one either," Bridgette replied, getting a little annoyed that Izzy was staying on this particular topic. The bell chimed once again.

"Did you ever let him see your nipples?" Izzy asked in a matter of fact tone.

Bridgette was about to answer when she stopped herself. She had managed to realize what exactly it was Izzy asked. The result of which was her cheeks turning into a deep shade of pink. She darted her eyes in every direction frantically before sinking into her seat. Whether she answered the question truthfully or not, everyone would know the honest answer. It was a question of whether or not to risk Geoff getting zapped again. Which she frankly did not want to do.

"... Yes..." Bridgette answered in an embarrassed tone. The bell chimed. The audience began to cheer wildly. Both because the round was over and that they got some interesting details about Geoff and Bridgette's relationship.

"Well, that was quite the round," Chris announced. "Bridgette managed to tell only one lie, which means she and Geoff are in first place with seventeen points. Now it's time to switch over as Geoff puts Owen in the hot seat. I'm actually not sure if this is something I want to hear, really."

"Alright, dude," Geoff said. "Sorry in advance if I ask questions that make you uncomfortable and all."

"There are questions that make people uncomfortable?" Owen stated in a frantic. "That's really scary."

"Um... sure, dude," Geoff said with a raised brow. "So, like, is Izzy your first girlfriend?"

"Uh-huh," Owen nodded happily. The bell chimed.

"Have you two gone out on a date since the show ended?" Geoff asked further.

"Yep," Owen replied. "Izzy managed to sneak into my bedroom one night and drag me out so I could take her to dinner and stuff. It was so much fun!" The bell chimed, which followed by Izzy giggling rather happily.

Geoff thought about what to ask next for a moment. "So, um..." he began. "Have you... said any pillow talk to her?" Owen gave him a blank stare like a lost deer would. "You know, sexy things to say to turn her on and stuff."

"Geoff!" Bridgette hissed with disapproval.

"Oh, okay," Owen said, seeming to have gotten what Geoff meant. "I've been wanting to tell her that she was so pretty that I wanted to cover her gorgeous body in pepper and then sneeze all over her." The bell chimed.

"Ooo, foreplay," Izzy squealed with delight. "Izzy like!"

The rest of the Marshmallow were wide-eyed, their attention fixed upon Izzy and Owen. All could not possibly fathom just how disturbed they felt after hearing those last couple of sentences. This would last for a good several minutes. Owen and Izzy apparently did not seem to mind the wait. At the end of which, the male fans began chanting Izzy and Owen's names out of sync.

"Um..." Geoff managed to utter. "So... Have you guys... met each other's parents yet?"

"Not yet," Owen replied. "But I'm hoping for all of us to get together for Christmas." The bell chimed.

"Come on, baby!" Izzy giggled suddenly. "Lie for me! I wanna feel the electro shock coursing through my body!"

"You really want me to lie and have you zapped?" Owen asked curiously.

"Uh-huh," Izzy replied. "So lie, baby, lie!"

Geoff witnessed this display of affection before him and was even more confused than ever. He watched as Owen nodded for him to ask a question that he would purposely lie to. "Uh..." Geoff began. "Did you win Total Drama Island?"

"Nope," Owen replied. The buzzer sounded, which was followed by Izzy howling with delight as she was electrocuted.

"That felt so good!" she squealed. "Do it again!"

Geoff raised his brow again, more dumbfounded than before of what he was finding himself being a part of. "Uh..." he tried to begin. "Is my name Steve?"

"Yes," Owen answered. The buzzer sounded again. Once more, Izzy was cheering as she was zapped again.

"This is so awesome!" she proclaimed. "You should try this, Owen!"

"Just hurry up and ask the remaining four questions, Geoff," Chris said in annoyance. "I don't want to hear any more of this."

Geoff looked at Chris and blinked for a moment. Then he shrugged and turned back to Owen. "Alright, dude," he said. "What food is red? What food is green? What food is blue? What food is yellow?"

"Apples, lettuce, blueberries, and lemons," Owen answered in one sentence. The bell chimed four times and the round was over.

"Thank God!" Chris sighed as the chairs rotated and dumped the four occupants to the floor. "With Owen having lied only twice, he and Izzy scored fourteen points. Geoff and Bridgette are in the lead while Eva and Justin remain at the bottom."

"If we end up losing this, I am going to kill you," Eva huffed at Justin. The male model merely cowered in fear as he got the fitness buff's eyes staring holes into his handsome body.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris McLean - /_Miffed_./ "If I had my way in terms of editing, I would've knocked out that whole nightmare that was Owen's answers. That's the kind of torture to be used to make people talk."

Izzy - /_Is covered with pepper from head to toe. She sneezes a little and giggles while rubbing her nose with her finger_./

* * *

"Alrighty, Beth," Chris continued. "Spin the wheel and let's see to whom we're going to deal pain and suffering to." Beth did so, spinning her wheel and letting it rotate rapidly before it slowed to a stop. "Well, well, well, it'll be Noah and Katie against Cody and Sadie. Which hot seat will our lovable egghead be in, DJ?" That was DJ's cue to spin his wheel, momentarily waiting for it to stop rotating and land on a picture. "Even more fun. So it will be Noah and Sadie in the electric chair, Katie and Cody taking the lie detector. This will certainly be an interesting round to watch."

Cody let out a sigh of relief, believing himself to be spared of the suffering that would have gone in the electric chair. As the four announced contestants found themselves being strapped into their chosen chairs, Cody looked over and noticed that Noah was grinning. In fact, the grin was curling wider. The techno geek was not at all comfortable with the look of this. Why would Noah be content with getting the electric chair and not the lie detector?

"I must admit, folks," Chris stated. "This particular round I have been waiting for the most. So ask away, Sadie!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris McLean - "Due to the hyper speed in which those girls spoke, we will be presenting you their particular portion of the round in ultra-slow motion. A process that's not easy to do, let me tell you."

* * *

"So, like, what is it like to kiss Noah?" Sadie asked.

"It's so wonderful!" Katie answered blissfully. "It's like being in Heaven!"

"Ohmygod!" Sadie squealed. "Has he, like, kissed you on other parts of the body?"

"Yes!" Katie replied excitedly and then sighed happily. "He's kissed my cheek, my hand. He's even kissed my neck."

"Wow!" Sadie said, letting out a sigh of her own. "That is, like, so romantic. Have you guys gone any further?"

"No, not yet," Katie replied with a giggle. "He's such the gentleman, I can't even begin to tell you about it."

"Aww, that's so cute," Sadie said with a giggle of her own. "So, like, what else is he gonna help you on."

"Well, he is helping me with my studies," Katie answered. "And he's agreed to help me with the sowing of some of the dresses I, like, want to start putting together."

"What kind of dresses?" Sadie asked excitedly.

"These really cute dresses," Katie replied. "Like this one inspired from, like, the Victorian age I want to wear some day. It's going to be so great, I can't wait to begin working on it."

"Are you thinking about, like, designing something for Noah?" Sadie asked with a giggle.

"Of course," Katie replied with a giggle of her own. "He's gotta, like, wearing something that would compliment my dress."

"What kind of suit will it be?" Sadie asked further.

"I'm thinking of this really cute silk blue suit," Katie answered with a sigh. "I, like, have these ideas for the ruffles. And the sight of him wearing it. Ohmygod, he's going to be so knock-dead gorgeous!"

"More handsome than, like, Justin?" Sadie gasped with excitement.

"Like, Justin wouldn't stand a chance against Noah in the handsome department," Katie stated proudly. "Noah is just so dreamy, every other guy pales in comparison."

"Has he given you a pet name yet?" Sadie asked.

"Of course he has," Katie answered with a giggle.

"What does he call you?" Sadie asked further.

"He calls me Katie-Kat," Katie replied. She giggled and then began to purr before the two girls exploded in deafening squeals.

As if it had lost all control, the bell chimed ten times rather rapidly in a failing effort to keep up with the speed at which the wanna-be twins were speaking. The audience did not know what to make of all this until the last bell chimed and simply began cheering for the heck of it. All of the other competitors and Chris looked at the girls with bewildered looks, unsure of what exactly was being said in all of this. Only Noah looked relatively calm. In fact, he seemed quite pleased with the grin on his face.

"Well..." Chris managed to say. "I didn't hear a buzzer in all of that. So I guess Katie told the truth ten times. Meaning she and Noah have a perfect twenty points." Katie immediately exploded into an even louder squeal, wrapping as much of herself around Noah's arm as the wired patches would allow her. "Let's see how Cody and Sadie fare. Ask away, Egghead."

"Whatever, Narcissus," Noah retorted. He then turned his attention to the techno geek sitting before him. "What is your name?"

Cody raised a confused brow. "Um... Cody," he replied. The bell chimed.

"What was your purpose is coming onto the show?" Noah asked further.

Cody chuckled sheepishly a little. "You know... to meet the ladies," he answered. The bell chimed again, followed by some squeals emerging from the audience.

"What is your favorite color?" Noah then asked.

"Blue," Cody replied unconsciously. His eyes then widened in horror. "No! Yell--" The buzzer sounded and Sadie screamed upon getting zapped. Cody immediately slapped his hands over his gapping mouth, realizing what he had just done.

"Cody, how could you?" Katie whined. "Why you lie to, like, such the more normal question ever?"

"That so wasn't nice of you to lie about something so simple, Cody," Sadie managed to cry as soon as the electrocution wore off.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Cody said rapidly in a pleading tone. "I guess I wasn't paying that much attention to the question when he asked it."

Noah waited a moment until everyone calmed down before he resumed question Cody. "Do you like Sadie, Cody?" he asked.

Cody was almost afraid to speak at first. Being absolutely certain that he understood the question and would answer truthfully. "Y-Yes, I like Sadie," he replied. The bell chimed.

"Would you be willing to date her?" Noah asked further.

"Sure," Cody answered in a heartbeat. The bell chimed, followed by members of the audiences awwing.

"Would you let her pay for everything on the first date?" Noah then asked.

"If she'd be willing," Cody replied. His eyes suddenly widened again. "No, that's not what I--" The buzzer sounded and Sadie was once again zapped, causing her to scream some more.

"Cody, what is wrong with you?" Katie complained. "Everyone, like, knows that you so never let a lady pay for anything on the first date. How could you possibly think Sadie would, like, be willing?"

"You are being such a meanie, Cody," Sadie cried.

"I'm really, really, really sorry, I swear," Cody pleaded. "I just got all caught up with the questions Noah was asking and I lost track of what I meant to say. I would never think about letting Sadie pay on the first date, honestly."

"You seem to be in quite a pickle, aren't you Cody?" Noah asked.

"Of course I am," Cody answered. "It's like I blurt out whatever comes to mind on every third question and realize that I'm not speaking the truth. It's making Katie and Sadie mad, I really don't mean to be so careless." The bell chimed.

"Would you do anything to prove how apologetic you are?" Noah asked further.

"Whatever it takes," Cody replied. "I'd be willing to switch places with Sadie and get the electrocutions if it meant getting their forgiveness." The bell chimed again.

"Have you ever touched a girl's underwear?" Noah then asked.

"No!" Cody answered. Then his eyes widened even more. "Wait! I actually still have Gwen's--" The buzzer sounded for a third time. And for a third time, Sadie screamed as she was electrocuted. This caused Cody to sink as far into his seat as possible.

"Cody!" Katie screamed. "Why are you lying all the time? You keep, like, saying your sorry, yet you lie again!"

"You're, like, a horrible person, Cody!" Sadie weeped. "I don't ever wanna go out with you!"

"Oh please, believe me," Cody begged. "I'm so sorry! I'm really not as heartless as you think! I'm just being a little careless, that's all! I don't mean to cause you to get shocked!"

"Do you wish for this nightmare to be over right now?" Noah asked.

"Yes, yes!" Cody screamed. "I can't take any more!" The bell chimed.

"Wow," Chris whistled. As he spoke, the chairs dumped the four contestants onto the floor. "That was quite the round, lemme tell you folks. Cody, of all people, managed to lie three times. Thereby placing him and Sadie in a tie for last place with Eva and Justin at eleven points. Didn't see that coming. And while I'm at it, I did not see Noah and Katie sitting at the top with a full twenty. Goes to show this game is quite unpredictable."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - /_Grinning_./ "All I did was simply ask the questions. It was all up to Cody to answer them honestly."

Cody - /_Still pleading._/ "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry--"

Katie - "That was so mean of Cody to lie as many times he did."  
Sadie - "I know, right? They were such simple questions, too."  
Katie - "Totally. Who, like, would have thought? Cody of all people."  
Sadie - "I know. I, like, so did not see that coming."  
Katie - "Me too."  
Sadie - "Although, he is too cute to stay mad at."  
Katie - "Yeah, I suppose."  
Sadie - "And, like, what's the point of being mad at him. It's not, like, he was intentionally lying."  
Katie - "So you, like, gonna forgive him?"  
Sadie - "Totally. In fact, I don't even know why I was mad at him in the first place."  
Katie - "Me too."

* * *

"The next round of our delightful little game will see Gwen and Trent against Ezekiel and Heather," Chris announced. "Beth, if you would be so kind as to spin the--"

"Hey, wait a minute," Courtney objected. "How come they automatically get the next turn?"

"You trippin', girl?" LeShawna questioned. She ignored the death glare she got from Courtney. "You do realize that Chris is runnin' the show. And you know how much he likes the four of us just squarin' off against one another."

"So why not make it the main event!" Chris added. The audience let out a great cheer while Courtney and Duncan merely groaned. "I'll be getting to you kids shortly. You're going to love what I have in store for you in your turn. Now then, where was I? Oh yeah! Beth, spin the wheel to see who amongst Ezekiel, Gwen, Heather, and Trent will be in the hot seat for their round."

"This is absolutely unfair," Courtney fumed quietly as Beth spun her wheel. "Harold starts costing me votes just by deciding to simply run against me. He attacks me without just cause. I don't get to campaign this week. And now Chris is going to milk every ounce of our hatred even after it runs dry. I hate this show!"

"All I need to do is find his stash of haircare products," Duncan muttered quietly. "I'll be able to create so much havoc on his hair, he'll wish he never crossed me."

"My oh my, Zeke," Chris announced. The prairie boy stood up in attention upon hearing his name called. He knew it could not possibly be good. "Looks like you'll be in quite the predicament. Let's see what kind of luck you have. DJ, please spin the wheel so we may find out which chair he'll be taking."

Ezekiel began fiddling with his toque as soon as DJ began to spin his wheel. On one hand, he would very much not like to be in the electric chair. For he knew that Heather was bound to lie, resulting in his getting shocked. And he would rather not get zapped any time tonight. On the other hand, being in the lie detector would be intimidating. He had no clue of what questions Trent would be asking him. Not to mention he would rather not cause any one else, even if it was Heather, any physical pain just because he could not tell the truth. There was also the thought that he would suffer her wrath if she did get zapped. So lost in his thoughts he was that he failed to notice that the wheel came to a stop.

"Man, we're in for a great night tonight!" Chris proclaimed. "It'll be Ezekiel and Gwen in the lie detector chair, Heather and Trent sitting in the electric chair. This is going to be awesome!"

Ezekiel slowly turned his eyes to the girl who was to be his partner in the challenge. He noticed that she was far from happy. Not once since it was announced that she was paired with him did she calm her frustrations. In fact, he was quite sure it was getting worse and worse with each passing second. To the point that he wished they would have gone first so they could get this whole thing over with as quickly as possible.

"Don't you just love it when strokes of genius come together?" Chris commented to the nearest camera while the four contests were strapped to their respective chairs. "So let's not waste any more time. Heather, if you will please."

Heather gave Chris a death glare for a moment before turning her attention to the goth girl sitting before her. "You're just enjoying yourself, aren't you?" she asked.

"Maybe a tiny, little bit, actually," Gwen replied. "I have to say that seeing something work against you is enough to make all this bearable." The bell chimed.

"You're not at all concerned about the questions I'm about to ask you?" Heather questioned, speaking with a tone that was meant to unnerve the goth girl.

"I've come to grips with the fact that I don't have much of a choice and will have to reveal things that I'm generally not comfortable opening up about," Gwen answered. The bell chimed.

"Would that include whatever sex life you might have?" Heather asked further.

Gwen took a deep breath. "I have a boyfriend," she replied. "Trent and I have been dating since the show ended. We've each slept at the other's place. And have agreed to only go that far when we're both comfortable about doing so." The bell chimed.

Heather started to appear quite annoyed. Gwen's answers came off as being less than conventional, yet she was nonetheless being quite honest. "Has he seen you in your underwear yet?" she asked. She then cursed herself upon realizing what she asked.

"Duh," Gwen replied. "Everyone has, thanks to you." The bell chimed.

"Has he seen you naked?" Heather asked further.

Gwen shrugged. "He's seen me without my top," she answered. The bell chimed.

"So were you purposefully exposing yourself to him?" Heather asked, once more trying to unnerve Gwen.

The goth girl merely curled her lips into a half-grin. "Let me put it this way," she began to reply. "He caught me undressing accidentally, but then I decided to tease him a little." The bell chimed. Followed by some whistling from the crowd. Gwen, and Trent, simply chuckled in reaction.

Heather let out a frustrated groan. "What the hell is with these answers of yours?" she asked.

"I don't have to say simple 'yes' or 'no' answers, so long as what I'm saying is still the truth," Gwen answered. The bell chimed.

Bridgette and Cody began thinking to themselves of how such a method of answering could have saved them a great deal of embarrassment and suffering they endured earlier. Courtney and Harold were also thinking about this, figuring how they could follow Gwen's example when it was their turn.

Heather huffed as her attempts to throw Gwen off were clearly not working. "So what, are you two planning to get married or something?" she asked rather off-handedly.

Gwen shrugged. "The stars are aligning in favor of such," she replied. The bell chimed.

Thinking she might have found an opening, Heather pressed the subject further. "You mean there's a possibility things might not work out with you two?" she asked.

"Nothing is for certain," Gwen answered calmly. "Trent and I take things one step at a time and let the cards fall wherever they please. If time is good to us, we could end up together forever." The bell chimed.

"Where the hell did you learn such cryptic crap?" Heather asked in utter frustration.

"What can I say, Trent's quite the poet himself," Gwen giggled lightly. "He is a musician after all." The bell chimed.

"Wow," Chris said. "I have to say, that was quite an impressive round. Gwen talked her way around having to directly answer the questions so that she and Trent score a perfect twenty points."

"That was such bull--/**censored**/, and you all know it!" Heather fumed.

"She was being honest," Chris noted. "That's all that counts to a lie detector. Any way, it's time to see how Ezekiel handles the pressure. Ask away, Trent."

"Sorry to have to do this to you, man," Trent said to Ezekiel. "If I had a choice, I'd rather not put you in a situation like this."

"Thanks, eh," Ezekiel responded nervously. "I'd rather not be in a situation like this either."

"That's cool," Trent noted. "So how are you feeling?"

"Okay, I guess," Ezekiel sighed. The buzzer sounded. The prairie boy squeaked upon hearing Heather scream as she was being zapped. He then nervously turned to look at her.

"What the hell, Zeke?" Heather fumed. "How could you lie right off the bat?"

"Hey, give him a break," Gwen said. "He's really nervous."

"You strap yourself down to this thing and then tell yourself to give him a break," Heather growled in return. She then gave Ezekiel a death glare that sent him frantically facing back to Trent.

"You doing alright at this school?" Trent asked.

"Uh, uh, uh..." Ezekiel uttered nervously. "I think I'm havin' a good time, eh." He immediately flinched, bracing himself for the buzzer to sound. But it did not. Instead, the bell chimed. Hearing this, he relaxed a little. "Whew."

"Have you been getting along with a lot of folks, Zeke?" Trent asked.

Ezekiel shrugged. "I like to think I have friends, eh," he replied. The bell chimed, comforting him just a little more.

"Any one you got a particular interest in?" Trent asked further.

Ezekiel thought for a moment. "Um... Not that I kn'oo of," he answered. The buzzer sounded, instantly turning him into a nervous wreck as he heard Heather scream from the shock she was receiving.

"Goddammit, Zeke!" Heather cried. "Everyone knows you're crushing on surfer girl!"

"Leave him alone," Gwen said. "It's not like he purposefully trying to get you shocked."

"Oh, and you and your boyfriend aren't?" Heather retorted with heated anger.

"So you like Bridgette?" Trent asked Ezekiel, getting the prairie boy's attention away from the fuming Queen Bee.

Ezekiel pulled his toque down over his eyes as he curled up into a ball. "... Yeah..." he replied. The bell chimed.

"What do you like about her?" Trent asked further.

Ezekiel sunk even further into himself. "She's c'oot and kind and smart and pretty..." he muttered. The bell chimed.

"Any desire to one day date her?" Trent then asked.

"N-No..." Ezekiel answered. The buzzer sounded. "Not while she's with Geoff, eh!" It was too late as Heather was once again screaming as she was being zapped.

"You... are... so... dead... Zeke..." Heather managed to say through the pain.

"You'd be doing the same thing he's doing if you were in his shoes," Gwen noted to Heather.

"F--/**censored**/ you, weird goth girl!" Heather seethed through her teeth.

"So you wouldn't dare try to break up Bridgette and Geoff?" Trent asked Ezekiel.

"Of c'oorse not, eh!" Ezekiel practically yelled, trying to defend himself. "That w'ood make her sad and I don't wanna make her sad, eh!" The bell chimed.

"So have you tried thinking about other girls you might like?" Trent asked further.

Ezekiel thought for a moment. "Never th'oot of that, eh," he said. The bell chimed.

"How about Heather?" Trent then asked.

"Um..." Ezekiel uttered as he thought some more on the subject. "I guess not, eh." The buzzer sounded. The shriek of pain Heather let out was quite deafening. Even for any one who was not in the Marshmallow. The poor prairie boy was now nothing more than a curled up ball, pulling his toque down over his eyes with all of his might.

"I'm gonna kill you, Zeke!" Heather cried. "You better purge any thoughts of getting into my pants before I get out of this chair!"

"With the effort you put into the way you present yourself, you really shouldn't be surprised he has an inkling, albeit misplaced, attraction to you," Gwen commented. "He's a guy. You're a girl. Do the math."

"It's his inability to keep his libido in check that got me zapped for the fourth time!" Heather screamed.

"Which means you and Zeke find yourselves at the bottom of the pack with eight points," Chris announced, chuckling gleefully along the way. As he spoke, the chairs dumped the four contestants onto the stage as they had before. "This is so much fun, watching you silly kids get so uptight and dramatic as our show promised."

Ezekiel immediately began scrambling about on the floor, trying to get away as quickly as possible from the fuming Heather. The Queen Bee got to her feet and began stomping her way toward the prairie boy, who was having a hard time even moving a couple inches. He suddenly found himself getting hoisted onto his feet and held close by none other than Bridgette and Geoff.

"Okay, why don't we just all cool our heads and take it easy," Geoff said calmly. Though one could see that he was more than ready to step into Ezekiel's defense if the situation called for it.

"What the hell is this?" Heather huffed. "You're taking his side? He openly admitted to crushing on your girlfriend!"

"At least he's respectable enough to accept my being in a relationship with Geoff," Bridgette said in return. "I was just as nervous as he was when I took the chair. You can't get this angry at him for fibbing once or twice."

"Once or twice?" Heather screamed. "He fibbed four times! I got shocked four times! And now we're in the goddamned bottom!"

"No one takes a threatening step towards Zeke and expect to get away with it!" Izzy proclaimed as she suddenly appeared in front of Heather. Upside down. "Izzy will not stand for this! You don't get to count as a hug for Zeke!"

"Get the hell away from me, psycho hose beast!" Heather fumed as she backed away a little from the crazy redhead.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Geoff - "Dude, that's so not cool of Heather to go after Zeke like that. He's a cool guy. So what if he has a crush on my girl. I bet all kinds of dudes have a crush on her. She's the coolest girl in all the world. I just happen to be lucky to be her guy."

Bridgette - "Heather's treatment toward Zeke was completely uncalled for. He was trying his best on the challenge. There's nothing terrible about that for her to get so worked up over."

Heather - /_Fuming_./ "That sexist prairie boy is dead! If surfer girl and party boy think they can get in my way of pounding that little runt, they've got another thing coming!"

Gwen - "You know what would be funny? If deep down, Heather really did have some sort of closeted crush on Zeke. How much fun that would be to see Miss Bitch Almighty falling for the little guy?"

* * *

"Okay, settle down kiddies," Chris announced. "We don't want to steal the thunder away from what will surely be an exciting final round tonight. We still have the rivalry of the century to showcase."

"Oh, sure," Duncan began to mutter sarcastically. "Don't want to mess with other people's enjoyment."

"Now, for our main event," Chris chuckled. "Beth and DJ will not need to spin their wheels for this one. The chairs you four will be seated in have already been determined. By the fact that Duncan was last week's looo-ser."

"I'm telling you, McLean," Duncan stated in a rather angry voice. "I have no problem going back to juvie if you keep pushing it."

"After tonight, you just might be begging to be crawling back there with your tail tucked between your legs," the handsome host teased. "Because you're going in the electric chair for this challenge."

"Big whoop," Duncan said, rolling his eyes.

"It gets better," Chris added. "You will be pressured to make Harold lie when you question him. Because for every question he tells the truth, he and LeShawna not only get two points, but you and Courtney lose a point."

"What?!" Courtney and Duncan cried.

"How the hell is that fair?!" Courtney added. "You're forcing his handicap onto me!"

"Are you seriously trying to make sure I come out of this at the bottom end again?!" Duncan fumed.

"Probably," Chris shrugged. "I needed some kind of handicap for you that was stronger than simply putting you in the electric chair. So forcing you to find ways into making Harold lie by deducting a point if he tells the truth seemed like the way to go."

"When this is all over, I'm suing your ass!" Courtney shrieked.

"When this is all over, you'll probably want to read the fine print of your contract first," Chris retorted gleefully. "It has such wonderful words written down about how you willfully agreed to accept sharing the penalties of a fellow contest under a handicap should the conditions of the challenge require you to be in partnership with them."

"This is a goddamned conspiracy!" Courtney screamed. "You people are trying to undermine my career! Preventing me from naturally succeeding just because neither of you can't!" She paid little to no attention to the glares and looks she was getting as a result of her words. She could care less about what they thought.

"And thanks to you people, she's too pissed off to allow me to get it on with her," Duncan grunted.

"Will you two stop complainin' already?" LeShawna demanded. "I wanna get this thing over with as quickly as possible."

"Oh, I'm sure there's plenty for you to be concerned about," Courtney stated. "You're the not the one having to share in your traitor boyfriend's handicap. Oh wait, he has no handicap. Duncan does!"

"I'm not gonna stand by and let you continue to belittle me and my girlfriend any more," Harold said angrily. "You've run your mouth more than I'm willing to take."

"Then you better be holding back your punches, four-eyes," Duncan threatened. "You got away with taking a swipe at my princess when I wasn't around. Try your luck again and you'll be getting real close and personal with my fists."

Before anything more could be said, the four students found themselves getting strapped to their respective chairs. When this had finished, the four went about staring death glares at one another.

"And to think, that was only the warm-up to what these kids have to do to one another," Chris chuckled. "It may not be as flashy as it had been in the past, but you can bet your bottom dollar this is going to be awesome! Alrighty, LeShawna. Ask away!"

"You can't lie once," Duncan managed to mutter quietly to Courtney. "All you need to do is answer truthfully the whole way and we won't have to worry about being in the bottom if I can't get to Harold."

"I already know that, Duncan," Courtney hissed back quietly. "I can do math by myself."

"Okay, Princess," LeShawna stated in a mocking tone. Both Courtney and Duncan glared at her with great heated passion, which only widened her grin. "You ready to get your man electrocuted?"

"I have no intention of losing to you, LeShawna," Courtney answered. The bell chimed.

"Suit yo'self," LeShawna said. "That reminds me, this is a good time to ask you a question I've been meanin' to ask. Do your folks know your goin' out with a delinquent?"

One could swear a vein was starting to appear on Courtney's temple as she took a deep breath. "My parents are away that I am in a relationship," she replied. The bell chimed.

"Tryin' to copy my home girl Gwen, eh?" LeShawna remarked.

"As long as I'm answering truthfully," Courtney stated. The bell chimed.

"If you can keep up with it," LeShawna noted. "So, your folks know your in a relationship. Have they met your punk boyfriend?"

Courtney took another deep breath. "They have asked to see him in person," she began to answer. "However, the distance between me and Duncan is too far apart for such a meeting to take place before I came here." The bell chimed.

"You tellin' me you and Duncan haven't been hookin' up since the show ended?" LeShawna pressed.

"While the distance is seen a problem to me, it is not seen as a problem for him," Courtney replied. "He just happens to have a habit of showing up when my parents are asleep." The bell chimed.

"Ah, late night excursions," LeShawna laughed. "Is daddy's little girl breakin' the rules under his very nose with the baddest of bad boys in all of Canada."

Courtney once again took a very deep breath. "Duncan is unquestionably a rule breaker, but there are lines I forbid him to ever cross," she stated. "Most especially when it is happening in my room." The bell chimed.

"So he hasn't seen you naked?" LeShawna asked.

Courtney shuttered, her cheeks blushing a shade of pink, her lips rolling inward to keep from blurting out the first thing that came to mind. One that would likely constitute as a lie. She took a moment to regain her composure and then took a deep breath. "I have allowed Duncan to see more of my body than I am generally willing," she answered. The bell chimed.

"How much skin?" LeShawna asked further.

The blush on Courtney's cheeks deepened in color. "No top," she replied. The bell chimed. Followed by whistling and howling for the audience. Causing Courtney's cheeks to burn hotter than before.

"Has he managed to at least get into your skirt?" LeShawna continued to press.

Courtney narrowed her eyes at LeShawna once again. "That would be one of the lines I have forbid him from ever crossing," she answered. The bell chimed.

"So he hasn't made you sing well into the night?" LeShawna asked.

"I'm not even that good of a singer," Courtney stated. The buzzer sounded. Courtney gasped in horror as Duncan found himself getting zapped as a result of her telling a lie.

"Oh, so close!" Chris announced with great laughter. "Courtney fibbed at the very end, meaning she and Duncan are entering the handicap portion of the challenge with a mere seventeen points. Which means if they have any hope to avoid being looo-sers this week, Duncan needs to force Harold to lie twice."

Duncan took a moment to get feeling into his body after the electrocution before slowly turning a frustrated face toward his girlfriend. "You manage to get through all those personal questions about our relationship... and yet you can't admit that you're actually a great singer?" he asked sternly. Ashamed, Courtney simply looked away from him.

"You might as well question your girlfriend some more," Harold said with a chuckle. "I doubt you'll be able to get the better of me in this game. I'm well trained in being honest about everything."

"We'll see about that, dweeb," Duncan muttered. He then took a deep breath and spoke directly to Harold. "So... having fun at the expense of myself and Princess?"

"It's satisfying," Harold replied. The bell chimed.

"Is that so?" Duncan asked with a raised brow, an idea forming in his head. "Ever felt this satisfied before?"

"No, I must admit this is the first time I've been this satisfied about something," Harold answered. Then there was a long moment of silence. Harold waited for Duncan to ask his next question. Yet Duncan simply sat there, looking back at him. "You're supposed to ask another question." The buzzer sounded suddenly and LeShawna screamed in shock as she was zapped. Harold witnessed this in horror before looking back to see Duncan snickering. "Hey, what was that for? He never asked a question."

"Actually, Harold, he did," Chris announced. "A clever little disguised he pulled over the actual second question, making it sound less of a question and more a statement. Good enough to confuse you, thereby making you give a false answer and getting LeShawna zapped as a result."

"You sneaky bastard!" LeShawna huffed.

"Which means he needs to make Harold lie to one of the next seven questions in order to avoid having him and Courtney being at the bottom with Ezekiel and Heather," Chris summarized. "Will he be able to pull it off? Let's find out, shall we."

"Thank you for such wonderful commentary, Chris," Duncan noted sarcastically. He then turned his attention back to Harold. "Expecting me to pull the same trick again, dweeb?"

"Yes and no," Harold answered firmly. "You'll probably attempt to sneak it on me when I least suspect it." The bell chimed.

"How are you and LeShawna doing as a couple?" Duncan then asked.

Harold gave out a heavy sigh. "We've never been able to really move forward the way we want to," he admitted. "What with the long distance between us." The bell chimed.

"Neither one of you made some sort of attempt to see each other?" Duncan asked further.

"None of us own a vehicle, really," Harold noted. The bell chimed.

"Whatever happened to the whole concept of separation makes the yearning heart hungry?" Duncan asked. Even he did not have the slightest clue of what he just said.

Harold thought about it for a moment then sighed again. "We're both really unsure about how exactly to move forward," he answered. The bell chimed.

"Have you guys even kissed all that much?" Duncan asked with a curious brow.

"We have," Harold replied in defense. He then managed to immediately sigh once more. "I just wish we could do so on a more regular basis." The bell chimed.

"Hurry up, Duncan," Courtney hissed very quietly and very impatiently. "You've only got two questions left to ask."

"Thanks for the reminder," Duncan grunted before turning his attention back to Harold. "So why the hell did you enter yourself in the Vice Presidency race?"

"In truth, I am doing it just to spite your stuck-up girlfriend," Harold said rather proudly. "But I also really believe that I am quite capable of being as much of a politician as she is." The bell chimed.

"You think getting into the race was one of your better decisions?" Duncan asked.

Harold was about to say something then paused. He thought for a moment of what to say. What troubled him about the question was that his answer would make him look pretty bad in terms of his chances in moving forward in the race. Particularly with an audience crammed with students whose vote he would need.

"I'm... not really sure about the answer to that," he replied. The buzzer sounded. Harold managed to slap himself in the forehead while painfully hearing his girlfriend get zapped for a second time.

"Yes!" Courtney cheered in relief. As if losing all sense of control, he managed to reach over to her side, grab Duncan by the collar and plant a big, wet kiss on his lips. The result of which caused many in the fans to squeal and howl with delight.

"Thought you said you weren't gonna kiss me until the election ended," Duncan teased after she removed her lips from his.

"Oh stuff it, you pig," she responded. Then planted him with another kiss.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - /_Sighs_./ "I had a chance to make them suffer and I blew. But... I have to say that Duncan did ask a good question. Is this decision of mine really the call I should be making?"

LeShawna - "This whole thing with Courtney and Duncan has clearly gotten on my nerves. But I can see that it's affectin' Harold in a totally different direction. He's startin' to have doubts about the whole runnin' against Courtney thing. Well... all I can do is stick by him no what he does and do so through the end."

Trent - "Gwen and I agreed to set up a double date with Harold and LeShawna some time after the election. I think it would really help their relationship. Maybe even ease them down after all the intensity they're going through with Courtney and Duncan."

* * *

"Now that was quite the finish, boys and girls!" Chris proclaimed while the chairs dumped the final four contestants onto the floor. "Harold fibbed twice, leaving him and LeShawna with fourteen points. And the two fibs were enough for Duncan and Courtney to walk away with nine points. Instead, it's Ezekiel and Heather all alone at eight points who are this week's looo-sers!"

Heather reached the point of being absolutely livid. She turned in an effort to unleash her wrath upon the poor prairie boy, but quickly found that her path was blocked by Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, Owen, Gwen, and Trent. All of whom standing their ground to keep her from lunging after Ezekiel.

"Now for the top spot," Chris continued. "It seems we have two couples tied with perfect scores of twenty. Noah and Katie, Gwen and Trent. Since we have ourselves a tie, the audience will get to vote on their favorite--"

"We had to transfer all the power from the voting devices to keep the electrocutions functioning during that last round," Jessica pointed out. "Their all drained."

"You mean to tell me we don't have a way of picking one over the other?" Chris groaned.

"The three of us could always judge," Chef Hatchet noted.

"Not happening," Chris responded. "I wouldn't be able to pick one over the other even by a coin toss." He then sighed and looked at the two couples in question. "The producers are so not going to happy about this. But with little other option, we're just gonna have to make you all co-winners of this week's challenge."

Katie squealed in utter excitement before immediately pouncing onto Noah for a huge, passionate kiss. The Egghead simply grinned. He got to win a challenge, make out with his girlfriend, and witness the handsome host suffer. Suffice to say, he was very much happy about how the day was ending. Even the audience was enjoying the sight of the couple, whistling and cheering them on. Gwen and Trent smiled at one another before Trent wrapped his arms gently around her waist and then placed a kiss on her cheek. A sight that made many females in the audience swoon.

"Now comes the part that will make the producers cry," Chris stated. "Your shared prize will be an all expenses paid dinner and a show tomorrow night. You two lovely couples will first enjoy a fancy dinner at another one of the finest restaurants that can be found in all of Kitchener. From there, you kids will have your own private box to sit in for a performance of one of the most extravagant operas playing in Canada. And yes, there will be no cameras."

Katie continued squealing as she hopped up and down in place while wrapping herself upon Noah's arm. "This is, like, so romantic!" she cried. "My first date with Noah! And we're going to an opera! Ohmygod, the costumes we'll be seeing! It's, like, going to be so fantastic! I love you, I love you, I love you!" She proceeded to rapidly kiss Noah's cheek, to which the audience continued to howl their approval. Noah's smile widened through all this.

"Yeesh," Chris muttered. "Get a room, you two."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - /_Smiling rather happily._/ "I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm starting to get addicted to Katie's perkiness. It's quite intoxicating, as a matter of fact."

Chris McLean - /_Raises a confused brow._/ "I'm still not seeing how the hell Katie could be so head over heels for Noah. It makes absolutely no sense whatsoever."

Katie - "Like, ohmygod. A dinner and an opera with Noah!"  
Sadie - "I know, right. That's, like, the most romantic first date ever!"  
Katie - "He's so cute and handsome and smart and dreamy!"  
Sadie - "You are, like, so lucky to have him as a boyfriend!"  
/_Both begin squealing together._/

Gwen - "Noah on a date. Now this should be interesting to see. We might end up having a dinner and two shows tomorrow."

* * *

**Match One -** Lindsay and Tyler (8-2, 14 pts.) vs. Eva and Justin (7-3, 11 pts.)

**Match Two -** Bridgette and Geoff (9-1, 17 pts.) vs. Izzy and Owen (8-2, 14 pts.)

**Match Three -** Katie and Noah (10-0, 20 pts.) vs. Cody and Sadie (7-3, 11 pts.)

**Match Four - **Gwen and Trent (10-0, 20 pts.) vs. Ezekiel and Heather (6-4, 8 pts.)

**Match Five -** Courtney and Duncan (9-1, 9 pts.) vs. Harold and LeShawna (8-2, 14 pts.)

**Winners:** Tie - Gwen and Trent, Katie and Noah

**Losers:** Ezekiel and Heather

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement

* * *

Just about everything with this chapter took longer than I thought. Longer to write, longer than usual chapter, longer than anticipated scenes. It was quite overwhelming. Enough to make me put aside **The Kobold Necromancer**'s cookie until I got this sucker done. Still working on it, in case you guys want to know. Just no immediate timetable since I have that story, this story, my Harry Potter story, work, and the holidays all running ab'oot at the same time. I recently discovered something that so makes for a great challenge idea. Unfortunately, I have to hold off on that until after the election angle gets wrapped. Just hope I don't forget about it. In the meantime, I also discovered a character that I'd like to use as inspiration for Izzy. She's a redhead, is quite the babbler, and wears green. Her name is Maxine Hunkel aka Cyclone, one of the recent characters in the Justice Society of America comics. That whole bit about the duck and the egg was taken and reworded at the end straight from the first issue of Bill Willingham and Matthew Sturges' run that just started a few months ago. All you Izzy fans should look her up.

---

**Next Up:** All is fair in love and war


	15. Week 5, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Fifteen

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Previously on Total Drama Academy...

Katie finally revealed her crush. And in a move that defied all possible logic and reason, she's head over heels for Mr. Know-It-All himself, Noah. Quite frankly, I still don't get it. What is it about Noah, of all people, that causes Katie to turn her into a puddle when all he has to do is move his pinky finger? Boggles the mind, lemme tell you folks.

Meanwhile, Harold has had enough of the disrespect he was getting from Courtney and Duncan. So he decided to enter himself into the Vice Presidency race against Courtney. Boy oh boy, did it ever cause fireworks to an already volatile feud between Courtney and Duncan against Harold and LeShawna. It doesn't help that Heather, in her new role as the hired gun of the Dodekatheon clique, will pull any and all strings to keep it going. Not to mention it's a sure fire ratings drawer, so you just know we're gonna milk it for all it's worth.

Which brings us to our Friday Night Challenge in The Marshmallow. One that was more about damaging the pride of our twenty-two students than anything else by forcing them to tell the truth to some reveal questions or risk getting their partners zapped by quite a hefty number of electrical volts. To make it even more fun, we forced the couples to have to work as a team. Although Tyler really lucked out from getting shocked one too many times as his lovely blonde bombshell of a girlfriend Lindsay had zero comprehension of the questions she was being asked.

One who turned out not so lucky was Heather. Being paired up with Ezekiel was more than just a strike against her perceived social status. Poor little Zeke was so nervous, he fibbed enough times that they come out as the looo-sers of the challenge. It's gonna be a long week for the prairie boy, no doubt about it. The downside to the challenge was that the voting devices got drained of their juices, which meant we had two winning couples. Gwen and Trent, Katie and Noah. Both will be setting off for a romantic dinner and box seats at an opera. All at the expense of the producers. Enjoy it while it lasts, freaks.

The elections are coming down the home stretch, and there's so much drama to be had at Riker Hall.

How much worse can the rivalry get?

How well will Noah and Katie's first date go?

How will we possibly prevent continued gross-out moments from Izzy and Owen?

These questions and more may be answered on today's episode of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Week 5, Day 1 - Saturday)**

"For the seventeenth time, sir, I already have my suit picked out," Noah stated in a rather bored voice. By this point, he was leaning against a post with his arms crossed. "And I shall repeat again the one request I have for you. Go away."

"You don't have to be so harsh about it, mister," the effeminate sounding salesman responded. "But I'm willing to ignore such rudeness if you'd just give this one a shot. It has such wonderful orange ruffles."

"Sir, you really are as thick as clotted cream that's been left out by some clot, and now the clots are so clotted, you couldn't unclot them with an electric declotter," Noah noted.

"Such the cynical young man, you are," the salesman commented. "I swear, I'd put you in time out if I could, mister."

"I'm sorry, I appear to be speaking to you in a foreign language," Noah said sarcastically. "Perhaps we would communicate better if I spoke in English. Sod off!"

"Looks like we found a useful way to take advantage of Noah's 'tude, dudes," Geoff chuckled from his seated position on the bench. "We should bring him along more often."

"I doubt he's any less cynical since having a girlfriend, though," Harold noted, sitting to Geoff's left. "In fact, I think he's more cynical than ever before."

"Well, romance doesn't always change a person," Trent commented as he examined himself in the mirror, comparing one suit to another. "Often times, it accentuates what their partner likes about them. Perhaps that's what Katie likes about him."

"Nah, couldn't be that," Geoff disagreed. "There's probably something else about the dude she likes. I really don't think the 'tude would literally turn her into a puddle whenever she's with him."

"Fair point," Trent said. "Alas, it will more than likely remain some big mystery. Noah's never one to socialize with others and I highly doubt his talking about his love life would be something he would be willing to reveal."

"D'oos he really 'ave his s'oot picked 'oot already?" Ezekiel asked curiously, sitting to Geoff's right. "I didn't see 'im grab anythin' since we g'oot 'ere, eh."

"I actually wouldn't be surprised," Harold replied. "Though he probably just grabbed the first suit that he thought would look decent for him to wear."

"You know, I have been meaning to ask since we got here," Geoff said. "How come you're out here looking for another suit to wear, Trent bra? I thought you liked the one you got last time."

"I do," Trent answered. "I just thought it would be nice to have another suit handy is all. Plus, Gwen talked me into it when she told me about the loophole she found."

"What loophole?" Harold inquired.

"The producers are flipping the bill for anything that has to do with this evening," Trent replied. "That includes the purchasing of any clothing from today. She saw it as another keen opportunity to stick it to Chris and them."

"So why did y'oo guys asked us to go with y'oo, eh?" Ezekiel asked further.

Trent chuckled. "For what she called the best part about the loophole," he answered. "Any clothing purchased today doesn't necessarily mean clothing that I'm going to wear."

The three seated boys looked at Trent and thought about what he said for a moment. Then Geoff figured it out and smiled. "You mean they're flipping the bill for clothes we buy too?" he summarized. Trent nodded. "Dude! I'm so getting something for when Bridge and I go out!" Almost immediately, the party dude leaped up to his feet and began sifting through all the suits in his sight.

"Just give me a minute to figure out what I want to get and then I'll help you guys pick something out for yourselves," Trent said to Harold and Ezekiel.

"A s'oot?" Ezekiel squeaked. "For me?"

"Sure," Trent said. "If nothing else, you got yourself some fancy clothes for whenever a situation arises requiring them. You too, Harold. Gwen and I are still planning on that double date idea we told you and LeShawna about, so we want you ready for it."

"Well, okay," Harold responded with a shrug. "If you say so."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Looking quite miffed._/ "Yes, that was a valid loophole. One that needed a remedy ASAP. Gwen sure loves for us to get are asses bitten, though I can't imagine why. If not for this show, she wouldn't have gotten hooked up with Trent. And look at all the friends she's made. She should be thanking us, not cursing us."

Geoff - "Free stuff is always cool. Especially when it's something I could use for Bridge. The suit I picked out is so awesome. I bet she got something just as awesome too. That we'd be the most awesome looking couple in Canada! How awesome is that?"

Ezekiel - "Trent said the s'oot I got is for whenever I need to have fancy cl'oothes, eh. I still don't kn'oo what c'ood happen where I need a s'oot. Unless I'm datin' someone. B'oot I'm not datin' any one." /_Scratches his head in confusion._/

Harold - "It's really nice of Gwen and Trent to want to have a double date with me and LeShawna. And it definitely would help out our relationship. I'm just not sure I could handle going on an actual date at all. Just thinking about it makes me all nervous."

Trent - "Gwen and I are still trying to figure out how to do all this with Harold and LeShawna. We're hoping to get some ideas of where we might go later tonight as we're being driven around Kitchener."

Noah - "What is it with these salesman and wanting to push things pink and orange? Do they not know most of their male customers loathe such colors? Particularly when it comes to trying to wear something for a date?"

* * *

"I so adore the way pink works with the fabric of this dress," Katie noted, looking at the dress she held in her right hand. "But the sleeves look, like, a teeny, tiny too long for me." She then looked over to the dress in her left hand. "The light blue dress so has this really cute bow in the back. But the skirt is, like, really too big."

"And the red dress won't do because it has this, like, really ugly corset," Sadie added, holding up the dress in her left hand. Then she held up the dress in her right hand. "And the green dress is just so not for you. I mean, like, the color is all wrong."

"Totally," Katie agreed. "I, like, wouldn't even wear that for Christmas."

"What's the shade on that one?" Gwen asked curiously, examining herself in the mirror wearing a dark blue dress.

"It's, like, pretty light," Katie replied. "It's also really sparkly."

"Toss it," Gwen gagged. "Let me know if you find a dark green dress. The darker the better. No sparkle whatsoever."

"I so can't imagine anything being dark and sparkly," Sadie noted. She then began to swoon. "But I can, like, imagine handsome and sparkly like Edward."

"Sadie, don't say his name," Katie complained, though her giggling made it clear she was doing a poor job at doing so. "Not when I, like, have a boyfriend now. You'll get me all excited."

"But he is just so dreamy, though," Sadie sighed. The would-be twins then began to squeal at the thought.

In response, Gwen let out a rather loud groan. "Do not get me started on Twilight," she growled.

"You don't like Twilight?" Bridgette asked in a rather surprised tone. She was putting on a shining gold dress with LeShawna, wearing a chocolate-colored dress, helping her out. "I don't mean to be rude, but I thought for sure you were a fan."

"It's an abomination to vampire lore," Gwen stated. "Who the hell would come up with some lame idea of sunlight not burning vampires to death like its supposed to, but instead make them sparkle? That's the most pathetic thing I've ever had the misfortune of knowing in my life."

"But... Edward is so hot," Sadie attempted to reason in a pleading tone. Katie nodded in agreement.

"That's supposed to excuse the fact that the dialogue he and Bella share is so sappy beyond belief?" Gwen asked. "Please. I've seen and heard better acting in an Ed Wood movie. And the writing of the books is just beyond atrocious. It's like Stephenie Meyer is out to completely discredit the entire vampire mythology that has been set in stone for centuries just because she had some dream of a guy who sparkled. Of all the reasons for him to sparkle, she had to pick vampire."

"Damn, girl," LeShawna laughed. "Tell us how you really feel."

"I swear to God, the next girl who asks me if I'm on Team Edward or Team Jacob is going to get a damned good right hook to the face," Gwen grumbled. She then took a moment to sigh and regain her composure. "Just don't ever make mention of that crap ever again, alright. I'm getting far too worked up about it, which in turn could put a damper to tonight."

"Guess we better change the subject then," LeShawna said. She then took a step back and examined Bridgette in wearing the shining gold dress. "Girl, you look real fine."

"Thanks," Bridgette said, blushing a little. "I usually prefer light blue colors, but this one looked really nice that I wanted to try it."

"Like, ohmygod," Katie commented with excitement. "You could so pass for Belle from Beauty and the Beast."

"The dress kinda does look the same, now that you mention it," Gwen noted with a raised brow.

"Stop it, you guys," Bridgette insisted, the pink on her cheeks getting deeper. "Besides, I'm really not sure if I would be able to get this if I wanted to. It's really expensive."

"Then you're definitely gonna get it," Gwen stated. "Remember that we're not paying for it. The producers are."

"If you badly wanna stick it to them, why didn't you invite everyone to tag along?" LeShawna asked curiously.

"They would've realized something was up if I did," Gwen answered. "So I asked you guys along since you were with me the last time and everyone knows Sadie was practically going with Katie wherever she went. It would minimize them finding out until it was too late what I figured out."

"Are you sure we should be doing this, Gwen?" Bridgette asked sheepishly. "I mean, we are taking advantage of a loophole and that, quite frankly, is morally wrong."

"Trust me, this is not morally wrong," Gwen responded with a grin. "It's payback for all the crap they put us through on that damned island. Remember when they wanted you to eat that hot dog made from dolphins?"

The mere mention of the frightening incident was more than enough to convince the surfer girl. "Now that you mention it, I don't see anything wrong with getting something this nice for free," she mused.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "From now on, I'm making damned sure to prevent Gwen and Trent from ever winning challenges in which the prize allows them to blow the producers' money. Do you know just how much that dress Bridgette got cost? More than the suits those guys ended up getting. Combined!"

Gwen - /_Gently pulls down one of her bottom eye lids with a free pinky and blows a raspberry at the camera._/

Bridgette - "That dress I got is really beautiful, actually. I hope something will come up in which I get to wear it. And I can't wait to see Geoff's face when he does see me in it." /_Giggles at the thought._/

Katie - /_Squealing_./ "Ohmygod, Sadie! I'm, like, so excited about my first date with Noah. I can hardly contain myself!"  
Sadie - "I know. It's, like, so exciting!" /_Starts to squeal along._/  
Katie - "The thought of me and Noah, like, sitting across from each other as we eat our dinner. Then, like, sitting next to each other as we watch the opera." /_Swoons and then squeals again._/

LeShawna - "I'm really hopin' Gwen and Trent pull through with this double date idea of theirs they have planned for me and Harold. We really could do with somethin' to get us goin' with our relationship. It's kinda been put on hold a little because of all this drama with that punk and his stuck-up girlfriend. So we really need somethin' to happen soon before it's too late."

* * *

"Everyone here?" Jackson asked. "Good. Well guys, it's Saturday. So it's time to run through some more ideas we can use for the next meet. I think we can all agree that, while Eva's suggestion for a complete contortion of the opponent's left thigh was quite entertaining, we need to come up with stuff that both is legal and everyone can pull."

The other wrestlers began to chuckle in remembrance while Eva merely smirked with pride. Duncan was anything but enjoying himself. The description of what happened last week did little to ease the fear that was building up inside him. He was going to get pulled apart. All because he spread copies of a compromising photo of one of his girlfriend's rivals. Being in a relationship sure did hurt a lot worse than he originally thought.

"Before we get started, though, let's say hi and give our advance apologizes to this week's victim, Duncan," Jackson said. "Jess personally volunteered him, so let's try not to break too many bones in his body."

Duncan wanted to say something in response, but thought better of it. Speaking sarcastically before a bunch of jocks who could easily turn him into a human pretzel was something he knew he shouldn't mess with. Instead, he merely waved as the others muttered their hellos and snickered at the fate that awaited him.

"Now then, why don't you get us started, Eva," Jackson announced. "Think you can come up with something for after taking the opponent down from behind?"

"Got a few I've been meaning to try out, actually," Eva chuckled as she cracked her knuckles before approaching Duncan.

"Just stand perfectly still, Duncan," Jackson advised. "The less you do, the least amount of injuries you'll sustain."

Once again, Duncan kept his mouth shut. Realizing that at this point he should probably remain so until the pain stopped. He took Jackson's advise and stood straight. He caught Eva disappearing behind him through the corner of his eye. Seconds later, he could feel her arms clamp around his waist. Before he knew it, he was hoisted into the air and then thrown face first down onto the mat. Sticking with Jackson's advise, he did not move.

"Here's an idea for a modified abdominal stretch," Eva stated.

Duncan wished he was unconscious at this point. Eva lifted his right arm, then wrapped her left leg around his neck while her shin was position behind his left shoulder. She looped her left arm around his right arm and then dug her right knee into his back. This followed shortly by her pressing her right hand down very hard on his exposed hip. Before long, she was shifting the weight of her arms down while pushing her right knee up even further into his back. Thereby literally bending him in half. It was taking whatever strength he could muster together to keep from crying, biting on his bottom lip to the point that he was about to break the skin. He remained in this position for a good two minutes.

"This acceptable?" Eva asked rather casually.

"Hmmm..." Jackson uttered as he studied the move carefully. "You might be on to something here, Eva. I think it's a matter of being able to get that left leg hooked in quick enough before the opponent could escape."

Duncan badly wanted to scream. The human body was not meant to bend this way and here he was being stuck in this position while a bunch of wrestlers studied it for what seemed like hours.

"Okay, you can let him go now," Jackson finally said.

Eva adjusted herself so that Duncan would slip out of her grip and land flat on his face on the mat. Duncan let out a rather long groan, the most he was willing to voice under the circumstances. It was no longer a question of whether or not this would get worse. It was now a question of how long it would be before he finally was able to lose consciousness.

"Now here's something I've been trying to conceive in regards to focusing on the legs," Eva announced.

It was a good three minutes later before Duncan could no longer feel anything and saw nothing but black.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Eva - /_Laughing_./ "Woo boy, that was fun. I haven't felt that good since I decked the principal at my last school."

Duncan - /_Wearing a neck brace and a cast over his right arm, speaking only in a pained whisper._/ "I think I better come up with ways to make my handiwork less obvious next time." /_Hisses in pain._/ "It's official. Don't get on Jessica's bad side."

Jessica - "I'm a very reasonable woman. I won't torture these kids any chance I get like Chris would. What I do is educational. As long as they learn the lesson behind my punishments, they'll become better people."

* * *

Gwen managed to get a hold of a dark green dress. One that looked Victorian-inspired. A striking appearance that caught Trent's breath the second he saw her as she opened the door. He himself was pretty well dressed in a dark blue suit with gold stripes at the end of the sleeves.

"I don't know about you, handsome," Gwen stated as she leaned up against him. "But I'm getting quite used to dressing up all fancy before a dinner date that we don't have to pay for."

"I was thinking the same thing, beautiful," Trent chuckled, wrapping his arms around her waist. "We should do this more often."

"As long as it's making Chris and the producers suffer," Gwen added. She rested her head on his chest and sighed. "I have to say, tonight will definitely be more interesting than perhaps any other."

"Let me guess," Trent said. "You're curious to see how Noah does on a date."

"I bet you I'm not the only one," Gwen noted. "Look real close and you can see that everyone has cracked their doors open just enough so that they could see out here. They're dying to see what Noah will do."

"Why not just sit out in the living space like they all did for us last time?" Trent asked with a curious brow.

"Think of it like they're on a nature documentary," Gwen answered. "They want to see what he's like when no one's watching."

"But we're the exception," Trent noted.

"Only because we're going with him and Katie," Gwen said.

Moments later, Noah emerged from his room. He looked quite well in his dark red tuxedo. He had one hand behind his back, the other was taking a quick second to set his tie straight. Satisfied, he then walked over to room eight where Katie would be. He knocked gently on the door, which resulted in a muffled squeal to be heard from the other side. Seconds later, the door slowly opened to reveal Katie. Her hair was tied back in a light bun and she was wearing the pink dress. She was blushing quite madly, as though she had been doing so for some time now.

"M'lady," Noah said simply.

He gently, though quickly took Katie's left hand with his free hand and brought it up for a kiss. Katie went into an uncontrollable giggling fit, hunching slightly and covering her quite heated cheek with her right hand. Noah then revealed from behind what he had in his left hand. A rose with the stem cut off. He brought the rose over to the top of Katie's dress, quickly using his right hand to dig into his pocket and pull out a pin. He then pinned the rose on her dress slightly to her left. Katie apparently forgot all about how exactly to stop giggling and blushing.

Noah took a step back so as to give Katie room to enter the hallway. After doing so, she immediately flung herself onto his left hand, wrapping herself entirely around it. Both looked at each other, Noah smiling and Katie still giggling before they began making their way toward the living space.

"I hate to say it," Trent commented. "But I think he's got the rest of us guys beat in the gentleman department."

"Just because the slightest thing he does pushes Katie that much closer to an orgasm?" Gwen asked with a raised brow.

"I wouldn't quite say that," Trent chuckled. "More like he seems to know exactly what to do for a date."

"He does read a helluva lotta books," Gwen pointed out. "No doubt he's studied up on what he needs to do to be a gentleman."

"Not to mention he's the youngest of nine," Trent added. "He's probably witnessed countless times what would be the best thing to do when dating a girl."

Gwen took a brief second to repeat the conversation in her heard. The brief second did not even last that long. "Yep," she said. "The rest of you guys are pathetic gentlemen compared to him."

"At least I'm enough of a gentleman for you," Trent stated, tightening his embrace just a little.

"Only because I wouldn't want you any other way," Gwen said. She allowed him to give her a gentle kiss on the cheek. "Now how about we get moving before Noah and Katie decide to ditch us, handsome."

"As you wish, beautiful," Trent responded, leading her down the hallway to catch up with the other couple.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "I have never seen any girl as out of control excited as Katie before. That girl just could not stop giggling or swooning while she was waiting for him to take her out. All for Noah. Either there really is somethin' about him that he doesn't share all that often or Katie's just an absolutely bonkers kinda girl." /_Sighs_./ "Then again, I should be the one to talk. What with Harold and me still needing to go on a date at all."

Geoff - "Noah was being really cool about being on his first date. Almost like he's been on a couple dates already. Got me thinking back to when I first tried hooking up with Bridge on the island. Boy, did I suck at first impressions. 'Wow, you pitch a tent like a guy?' I'm just glad things are now working out between us."

Chris - "Our lovely couples didn't return before the camera's had to go dark at midnight, so we don't get to see if anything interesting happened in the aftermath. A shame, really. I'm sure we all would have liked to see what Noah and Katie were like getting back from their first date."

* * *

**(Week 5, Day 2 - Sunday)**

Courtney sat with an ironic mixture of patience and anxiety. Dressed in the most professional set of clothing she could find amongst those she packed and her hair tied up into a professional-looking ponytail. She kept her hands folded upon a stack of papers that rested on her lap. Doing her best not to breath too fast and yet not too slowly either. She would occasionally notice that her right heel would begin to tap and try to put an immediate stop to it.

She had arrived at the office of the junior class school official a lot earlier than she was expected. In fact, the official had not even begun to call for any one who was serious about running for the Vice President seat. Courtney believed, even more so than Noah, that showing up early was a sign of just how serious she was about wanting to be elected to the seat. The practice had helped her in the past, so she saw nothing wrong with continuing to do so now.

Courtney had been sitting for an hour, waiting to be called for. Before she knew it, she saw that some one was entering the waiting room. Chelsea. Dressed much more professionally than Courtney, her hair tied into a bun. She confidently walked over and sat herself to Courtney's right. Courtney could not help but glance over at the girl who was indeed one of her rivals in the race. Chelsea brushed her legs lightly before gently placing down her own stack of papers upon it.

"I see you are quite the early bird," she said in a matter-of-fact tone. More than enough for Courtney to officially not like her one bit. "It's generally an overdone practice. But given that you were forbidden by your R.A. and homeroom teacher from campaigning the past week, I'm sure it's a reasonable exception." Now Courtney really did not like her.

"Probably worked out in your favor," Courtney began to retort in a calm tone. "After all, it's two less bodies to worry about keeping such a lovely picture of you fresh in the minds of the students. Maybe if politics ends up not working out for you, you could get in touch with Justin and see if his modeling agency can do something for you."

"I highly doubt you could get far in life having been a Counselor in Training these days should you not make it in politics," Chelsea began in response, her voice also calm. "Most especially not with the attitude you seem to can't help but display against our shared opposition Harold here. And certainly not when you're making sweet love to a criminal thug like your boyfriend."

"The public doesn't seem to mind my relationship with Duncan," Courtney said in return. "As a matter of fact, I believe our relationship is quite popular among them. More popular than, say, your campaign, if I recall correctly. I mean, you don't have to take my word for it. Just count how many posters there are of when Duncan and I first kissed against how many of your campaign signs are posted about the school. If I hadn't known any better, I'd say you're just jealous of how popular I am."

"Well, I don't have to rely on a television show in order to boost my popularity," Chelsea stated.

"Of course not," Courtney immediately said. "You just need a hired gun to manipulate situations into your favor."

"At least I can run my campaign by myself," Chelsea responded. "I don't need some braniac as my manager."

"Perhaps you should consider hiring one," Courtney said in return. "I mean, if the only thing memorable about your campaign has been to counteract the spreading of your photo, then you probably need someone to run the show for you."

"Slacker," Chelsea stated.

"Loser," Courtney retorted.

"Ruffian," Chelsea said back.

"Fop," Courtney responded.

"Courtney?" a voice called out from the office door.

Upon hearing her name, Courtney brushed herself lightly to make sure everything was straight. She took her stack of papers into her hands and stood up. "And by the way, it's not the set up that's important," she stated to Chelsea before leaving. "It's the execution that counts. You'll see for yourself just how good I am at finishing." With a smile, she turned and made her way into the office. Leaving Chelsea to brood from the conversation that had just ended.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "Chelsea needs to go down. I have no desire to see her succeed in anything except in being a failure." /_Sighs_./ "Just my luck. First, I have that traitor trying to ruin my reputation at every turn. And now I have to contend with someone who is as equally ambitious as I am. As if things could not get any more unfair for me."

Heather - "My primary goal is to ensure Chelsea gets elected, that much I need to do. But Chelsea was none too happy about her encounter with Courtney earlier that she told me to take her out. I need to let off some steam after the crap that was pulled on Friday, so I'm more than willing to do so. I have quite the plan for Courtney this week. Just enough so that Chris can finish off whatever credibility she had left in the challenge."

* * *

"It was so romantic!" Katie squealed to Sadie and Lindsay as they squished in together on the couch in the living space. The subject of the conversation would be quite obvious to any one passing by. She was going over her first date with Noah. "The entire time we were, like, in the limousine, he was twirling loose strands of my hair!"

"Awww," Lindsay sighed blissfully. "That is so cute!"

"When we got to the restaurant, he was such the gentleman," Katie continued. "Opening the door for me, pulling the chair for me, allowing me to order everything first. And while we were waiting for our meals, he told me how beautiful my eyes were and how the pink fabric of my dress matched the pink on my cheeks!"

"Ohmygod, that is so true!" Sadie noted in an excited tone.

"The dinner was, like, amazing," Katie swore. "Noah told me to take small bites and chew slowly because that way I would savor the whole thing. And he was so right! It was, like, the best steak I ever had it was that good."

"Did you have dessert?" Lindsay asked with anticipation.

"Banana split!" Katie replied breathlessly. "And we were sharing it! He let me have the last bite!" The other girls started squealing with excitement. "Ohmygod, he is such the perfect boyfriend."

Whether or not the three girls knew, their conversation was being observed from the side by Gwen, Trent, LeShawna, and Harold. LeShawna and Harold still could not believe what they were hearing about Noah. Gwen and Trent merely smiled.

"They gotta be frontin' me, right?" LeShawna asked. "Noah was really that much of a gentleman last night?"

"Katie may be exaggerating a few minor things here and there," Gwen began to reply. "But, as hard it is to imagine, she's not kidding. Noah went out of his way last night to be the single greatest gentleman a girl could ever hope of dating."

"Even during the opera," Trent added. "He went the distance to make sure she could see the whole show and that she had the most comfortable chair available in the box. When we got back here after the show ended, he maintained being a respectable gentleman and not even trying to push further than a simple kiss."

"Gosh," Harold noted in an impressed tone. "It's like he's a completely different person when he's dating Katie."

"I'd be willing to think that this is the still same cynical egghead we all know and mostly dislike," Gwen said. "It's just that when he's in an environment he's real comfortable with it's something rather amazing to witness. Being on a date with Katie would end up being one of them."

"Damn," LeShawna mused. Then she shook her head. "Well, you two can tell us more about it. We gotta get Harold ready to meet with them school officials since he's in the race."

"Good luck, man," Trent said with a wave.

"Thanks," Harold responded as he began moving toward the door leading up to the dorms.

Unbeknown to Harold, the door had swung back open. Before he could even turn his head straight, he ran into someone rather hard and found himself falling to the ground. The person he ran into suddenly let out a painful yell. Unsure of how simply running into someone could cause them great pain, Harold looked up to see who he collided with. It turned out to be Duncan. Who was still wearing a neck brace and a cast over his right arm.

"Hey, watch where you're going," Courtney stated. Duncan simply hissed through the pain he was feeling.

"We could be saying the same thing to you, you know," LeShawna responded as she helped her boyfriend back up to his feet.

"What the hell?" Courtney demanded. "I just told him to watch where he was going. I wasn't telling him to get out of our way."

"With the attitude you give him, you might as well have been sayin' that," LeShawna responded.

"If any one is giving any attitude, it's you, LeShawna," Courtney stated harshly. "We were simply going to go on our way, and yet here you are trying to make an issue out of them running into each other."

"What I take issue with is the way you and the delinquent boyfriend of yours be treatin' my man, Lil' Miss Prissy-Pants," LeShawna retorted. "You react all so dramatic and hostile to the slightest thing he does."

"I am not being dramatic and hostile," Courtney said back in a tone that contradicted her words.

"Hey, come on guys," Trent said, trying to break things up as quickly and as peacefully as possible. "Let's just relax for a moment and then go about business separately, alright? Nothing will be solved if you two keep yelling at each other."

"I've been trying to do exactly that," Courtney complained. "But Miss Ghetto Girl is blowing the whole thing out of proportion."

"What I'm doing is confrontin' you about how you and your punk-ass boyfriend continue to disrespect my man," LeShawna stated.

As this was going on, no one saw that Duncan walked off for a moment. He spotted a bucket that was full of some kind of substance that he would rather not be familiar with. He walked back toward everyone and waited until LeShawna finished her last sentence. When that happened, he took the bucket and dumped all of the contents over her. Any one who had been paying attention to the argument that was happening gasped in horror.

"Hey, that was uncalled for!" Harold yelled, throwing himself right into Duncan's face.

"If your girlfriend is going to stand up for you, then I might as well stand up for my princess," Duncan said. "And since I am not in the mood for yelling, I decided to do the next best thing. Shut her big yap by dumping something on her."

In a flash, LeShawna forcefully grabbed Duncan by the collar and pulled him over to her. "I double dare you to do that again," she growled. "Give me an excuse to break that other arm of yours."

"You put him down this instant!" Courtney demanded. "You getting slopped by whatever the hell was in that bucket, I think, is a fair trade for your goddamned traitor of a boyfriend running into him in the first place."

"You have no right to boss my girlfriend around!" Harold yelled at Courtney. "And there's no way that his slopping her is a fair trade for my accidentally running into him. What he did was way worse!"

"Way worse?" Courtney huffed. "His dumps some contents on top of her is worse than your causing him pain for hitting his injured body parts? You should both be so grateful he didn't try to sock her!"

"How dare you threaten to harm my girlfriend!" Harold responded with great anger.

The two couples engaged further in their heated argument that neither Trent nor Gwen could even begin to try to break it up peacefully. Katie, Sadie, and Lindsay were fare too scared of what was that happening that they began to huddle together very close. Just as Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna were about to come to blows, a huge stream of water splash into them. The water kept coming for a moment before it finally stopped, leaving all four bodies completely soaked. Bewildered and confused, everyone looked over to see where the water originated from.

"Hey guys, check it out!" Izzy announced with excitement. "I found one of those water guns they're using on the roof to keep Cody's fan girls from climbing into his room lying round near the bathroom! Isn't it cool looking?" In her hands was no ordinary water gun. In fact, it had more in common in shape and size to a rocket launcher.

For what seemed like hours, everyone else in the living space just merely stared at her in utter disbelief.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chef - /_Angry and frustrated._/ "When I find out who the idiot was that left his weapon for crazy girl to get access to, I'm kickin' his ass! You never leave your weapon behind, even when you're takin' a leak!"

Cody - /_Eyes wide open and blushing._/ "... G-Girls... actually try to... climb into... my room?"

Lindsay - "Why are Darren, Carrie, Harvey, and LaMicha always fighting? It's so scary when they fight. Almost as scary as when Chavo was chasing me with that water gun back on the island."

Gwen - "Trent and I felt it would be best if we could do what we could to keep those four separated as much as possible. But we both know it's almost impossible to do this by ourselves. We need some serious help to get make sure they don't erupt again."

Heather - "Of course, I really don't have to do all that much to get those four at each other's throats. In fact, I just simply have to make sure they run into each other and the fireworks will go off on their own. It's that simple."

Izzy - /_Holding a box of French fries in her hand._/ "Rolf Weiner, noted phlebotomist, had it all. Love, money, the respect of his peers. Nobody else in the entire hospital could draw blood the way Rolf could. But all that changed once he began to dabble in the 'dark side' of phlebotomy. Sure, there was power there. Great power. But at what cost? You may ask, 'Was Rolf's immortal soul worth the benefits that his shadowy pursuits purchased?' And to that Rolf answers, 'Yes! And yes! And yes! It was worth it.'" /_Munches on a handful of fries._/ "Of course, Rolf learned everything he knows about phlebotomy from a three-week course at the YMCA, so he may not be the best judge of this kind of stuff."

Chris - /_Stares at the camera with a blank, confused expression._/ "... I have no comment."

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, "Vote Courtney for Vice President" Flyer covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement

* * *

I'm serious, there's a particular challenge I want to do. But I can't do it until after the election story arc gets wrapped. So now I'm speeding through these next few chapters just so I can get to that challenge. Just like how I will be keeping this little bit down here short. Because I really want to do the challenge that much. Otherwise, I'll go nuts. And not the good kind like Izzy. I will say, though, that I promise to get more Confession Cam Decorations in during the next chapter.

---

**Next Up:** A Week in Hell


	16. Week 5, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Sixteen

---

**(Week 5, Day 3 - Monday)**

Cody hid nervously to one side. He peered out through the window in short periods before ducking back down. He seemed to have been doing this for quite some time before any of the others arrived in the living space to prepare for the day's classes. The first to enter were Ezekiel and Tyler. Both immediately noticed what Cody was doing and curiously approached him.

"What'cha l'ookin' at, Cody?" Ezekiel asked.

"I, um..." Cody whispered nervously. "I'm trying to see if... Well... If the coast is clear."

"What are you doing that for, dude?" Tyler questioned further with a curious brow raised.

Cody nervously darted his eyes in all directions before swallowing rather hard. "It's what Izzy said yesterday," he replied.

"What she say, eh?" Ezekiel asked.

"Well..." Cody began to answer, tapping his fingers together. He then stood up and took a deep breath. "She said that, um... That girls try to... climb into my room... while I'm asleep."

"Really?" Ezekiel asked in a surprised tone.

"Yeah," Cody sighed in reply. "And the only reason they don't get in is because of the security guys on the roof shooing them off with those bazooka-sized water guns."

"So why are you acting all nervous and stuff?" Tyler questioned. He scratched the back of his head and looked at Cody curiously. "It's a good thing that you got all these girls that like you, right?"

"Kinda," Cody answered in a rather hesitant tone. "Only lately they've been trying a lot of things when it looks like I'm alone."

"Y'oo mean like that time last week when th'oose five girls alm'oost t'oore y'oor shirt 'oof?" Ezekiel noted while tapping his chin.

"Exactly!" Cody nearly cried. "During lunch the other day, one girl was literally crawling so that she could grab my leg. And then that other time when a couple girls screamed about wanting locks of my hair."

"They really do that kinda stuff?" Tyler asked, this time in a surprised tone of his own.

"If I wasn't always around you guys from the show, I probably wouldn't be alive right now," Cody stated.

"I can see him!" a voice suddenly screamed outside. "I can see Cody!"

Cody frozen in horror before daring to peek out the window. Out of curiosity, Ezekiel and Tyler pulled up the blinds and saw for themselves what was waiting for Cody outside. Screaming and squealing teenage girls as far as the eye could see.

"We love you, Cody!" the vast majority screamed in unison.

"Whoa," Ezekiel said in a bit of awe over what he was seeing. "There's a l'oota girls 'oot there, eh."

Cody said nothing. Instead, the pupils of his widened eyes began to shrink further and further inward until they were nothing more than just tiny little dots upon two giant white spheres. His cheeks were burning hot pink. It would only get worse.

"Can I have an autograph?" one girl screamed.

"Can I have a photo?" another cried.

"Can I touch you?" a third squealed.

"Can I have a kiss?" the next screeched.

"Can I have a piece of your hair?" the last shrieked.

"Well," Tyler said before slapping Cody on the back of his shoulder. "Nice knowing you, Codester." The jock immediately turned and walked away from the doomed techno geek.

"Can I have your shirt?" a girl screamed.

"Can I have your underwear?" another cried.

"Can I have sex with you?" a third squealed.

"Can I marry you?" the next screeched.

"Can I have your child?" the last shrieked.

"Help... me..." Cody whimpered. Moments later, his eyes rolled upward and then fainted.

Ezekiel looked down for a moment at Cody. Then through the window to see the sea of raging hormones outside. Then back at Cody. Then back at the girls. With a raised brow, he scratched his head underneath his toque.

"I d'oon't get it, eh," he stated aloud.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Tyler - /_Pins a Toronto Blue Jays banner above the portraits of the Star Trek captains_./ "Hey, no one else seems to be doing it. Might as well. If they don't like it, then maybe they should put their own stuff up."

Cody - /_Taps his fingers nervously_./ "It's no secret I would like a girlfriend. But I want to start out by going steady with just one girl. Not be torn apart by so many of them." /_Darts his eyes about the room rapidly_./ "I... I appreciate that I have a lot of fans who are girls. It's just that they come at me in such large numbers, and they're also quite forceful. I didn't quite imagine fame being anything like this."

Ezekiel - "Sooo... havin' a l'oota girls like y'oo is a bad thin'? ... This is all so conf'oosin'. I don't think I'll ever get girls, eh." /_Sighs then looks around at the decorations in the room_./ "Y'oo kn'oo, seein' all this stuff in here reminds me that the livin' space 'ootside is very plain lookin'. Aren't we sup'oose to do somethin' with that?"

Gwen - "With Courtney on the verge of committing mass murder if she doesn't get elected onto the student body, decorating the living space is the very least of our worries at the moment."

* * *

**(The Smarty Pants)**

For the students, it was almost like watching a tennis match. Whenever the math professor was facing the room, Courtney and Harold were paying full attention to the lesson being taught. But when the professor turned his back to write an equation on the board, Courtney and Harold turned their eyes to one another in great hatred and fury. The students could also see that the two were very slowly raising straws to their mouths. As if to engage in a spit wad battle if they dared. Just as it seemed their war would commence, however, they would switch back to their learning stance mere seconds before the professor could turn away from the board.

"Mod f-x... squared... d-x," the professor stated aloud as he wrote on the board. He turned back just after Courtney and Harold reverted their attention back to him. "So please finish Perceval by next time." Most of the students not associated with the show groaned a little. "I know many of you have already done this last term, but it wouldn't hurt to brush up before the next exam."

"Looky, Gwen, looky!" Izzy whispered, pointing at the professor's desk with a great deal of glee and excitement.

Gwen raised a curious brow at the crazy girl. Then she glanced over at the professor's desk. "Okay, I give," she whispered with a sigh. "What is the result of your current bout with A.D.D. this time?"

"Something fuzzy was running on the professor's desk," Izzy whispered back.

"Something fuzzy," Gwen repeated, look at Izzy with a look of uncaring disbelief. "Running on the professor's desk. Right."

"Izzy a master huntress," Izzy stated in a quiet, determined tone. She then ducked under her desk and slowly began to tip-toe toward the professor's desk. "Izzy will capture elusive creature."

"Have fun," Gwen said sarcastically.

"Tell me you weren't just engaging in a conversation with Izzy," Noah whispered to Gwen.

"Just give short answers and don't bother trying to stop her from doing whatever she wants," Gwen answered back. "You'll be less confused and not a lotta people will get hurt."

"What about Courtney and Harold?" Noah asked further, directing his thumb over to the two students in question. The same two who were once again slowly raising straws to their mouths.

"Them we may have mighty problems with," Gwen answered. "I have the feeling they will hurt any one that even attempts to get in their way at this point."

"I'm also putting an advanced fourier system on the main chalkboard here," the professor announced, tapping his chalk on the board in question. "I'm hoping that one of you might prove it by the end of this semester."

The majority of the students looked at the equation written upon the board. Most began to moan in agony, believing it to be quite the difficult problem to solve. Even Courtney and Harold subsided their rivalry long enough after the professor had turned away from the students to feel disheartened by the challenge they saw upon the board.

"The first person to do so will not only be in my good graces, but also go on to fame and fortune by having their accomplishment recorded and their name printed in the auspicious 'M.I.T. Tech'," the professor added. He turned back to face the students and noticed that there was something wrong with the picture.

The first thing he noticed was that Courtney and Harold appeared to have some strange objects in their hair. Small little white spheres. The other thing he noticed was that a student was missing. Izzy.

"Apparently something on your desk perked her fancy," Gwen said when the professor looked to her for answers.

Everyone looked over at the professor's desk to see Izzy crept down behind the desk. It looked as though she was silently stalking something. Seconds later, she flung herself onto the desk and cupped her hands around the apparent object in question. Laughing triumphantly, she hopped down and revealed her prize to the others.

"Look!" she cried. "I found a hamster!"

"Well, that certainly would be something fuzzy running on the professor's desk," Gwen noted, rolling her eyes.

"I'm sure that little fellow belongs to the science department," the professor said. "Those things tend to pop about the school from time to time. How about hanging on to it until class ends and then you can take it back to them. Please take a seat."

Izzy skipped gleefully over to her desk. Before he continued with the lesson, the professor noticed that there were more white spheres in Courtney and Harold's hair. There was even one on the right lens of Harold's glasses.

"Former winners include Nobel Laureates, Field's Medal winners, world renowned astrophysicists, and lowly M.I.T. professors," the professor stated. He was about to say more when he turned and found something even more unexpected than before. The problem in question had been solved. He turned back to the class, the students who noticed were just as baffled as he was. Gwen and Noah, on the other hand, merely directed their eyes over to Izzy.

"I shall call him Squishy," Izzy said as she held the hamster to eye level. "And he shall be mine. And he shall be my Squishy. Come on, Squishy. Come on, little Squishy." She started to speak baby talk to the hamster when she felt her finger get nipped. "Ow. Bad Squishy, bad Squishy."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Toronto Blue Jays Banner)**

Courtney - /_Making disgusted faces while removing spit wads from her hair._/ "I cannot believe I was involved in something as childish as spit wads. It's like he's intentionally killing my reputation with each passing minute."

Harold - /_Wiping his glasses with a cloth_./ "I'm getting less and less confident about all of this the more it keeps going. It seems like all I've been doing ever since I entered myself into the race has been nothing more than get into confrontations with Courtney. I haven't even figured out what I actually would do if I do get elected."

Noah - "First there was fisticuffs. Now there's spit wads. Next thing you know, they'll be engaged in one big pie fight during the debate. Can this situation get any worse?" /T_hinks about what he had just said for a moment._/ "Although, a pie fight in the middle of the debate actually wouldn't be a bad thing to have..."

Gwen - "I can just only imagine the fireworks Duncan and LeShawna would set off. It's just too bad Izzy can't be in two places at once with the water gun she stole from the show's production crew. ... Then again, I am talking about Izzy..."

Izzy - /_Holds the hamster in hand, pets it slowly._/ "If there's one thing that small-pet breeder Pip Wallace has learned over the years, it's that mankind's greatest enemy is the hamster. The horrifying truth is that their cute and fuzzy exteriors conceal a deep and uncompromising evil. Over the years, Pip has been able to discern these hateful creatures' malevolent intentions. Their goal is nothing less than genocide. Even now they are preparing to rise up, throw off the shackles of their habitrails and fun wheels, and gnaw the throats of our children while they sleep." /_Brings the hamster to eye level and stares at it for a long moment before putting it on top of her head_./ "Fortunately, they're just hamsters."

* * *

**(Week 5, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

**(The Others)**

"You a dead man, Duncan!" LeShawna hollered. "I've tolerated your prankin' long enough!"

"It'll all be over if you just do one simple thing, LeShawna," Duncan said back. "Get your geek of a boyfriend to drop out. Then everything will be fine and dandy."

"Like hell I'm gonna let you and your uptight girlfriend walk all over my man and expect us to do absolutely nothin' about it!" LeShawna yelled. "And you know as well as I do that none of this crap woulda happened had Miss Prissy-Pants just allowed Harold to apologize to her in the first place."

"Okay, this is seriously getting way too harsh, dudes," Geoff stated. "All these bad vibes are messing with all the good mojo."

"We're way past the point where these arguments are affecting everyone, Geoff," Trent grunted. "When it requires us to literally pay Eva to hold LeShawna back from tearing Duncan's eyes out, that's when the problem has reached astronomical proportions."

"It's probably farther since Eva needed help from Tyler and the three of us needed Owen to hold back Duncan," DJ pointed out. "As if the both of them been working out just so they can break loose from us."

Most everyone else simply stood back and watched in horror at the scene that was on display for lunch. Katie and Sadie were already locked in a tight embrace, scared beyond belief at the scene before them. Lindsay was whimpering about, hoping that nothing bad would happen to Tyler as he helped Eva in holding LeShawna back. Even Justin managed to look away from his mirror to take a look at what was happening.

"Touch my neck and LeShawna won't be the only one on my hit list, fat boy," Duncan said in a threatening tone to Owen. "I'm still feeling it from when Eva stretched me over the weekend." This caused the big guy to shake in fear for a moment and nearly lose his grip on the delinquent.

"Will somebody please just put a stop to all this?" Bridgette nearly cried, though in an awfully tired tone. She had been seated with her arms cross, hunched over as though any second she was suddenly fall asleep. "I haven't had a good night's sleep for days with the way Courtney's been acting in our room."

"Hey, I'm not responsible for what princess does, alright?" Duncan stated. "I just happen to find whatever ends up doing to be pretty damned hot and sexy."

"What's so hot and sexy about all the plotting she's been speaking aloud in her sleep?" Bridgette questioned. "The things she wants to do to Harold. I can't close my eyes without suffering a nightmare from how descriptive she gets."

"Oh, I'm so gonna tear that girl a new one for that!" LeShawna hollered. "Tryin' to threaten my man behind my back!"

"Give her a break, for crying out loud!" Duncan yelled. "It's not like she actually attempts to go through with anything she says in her sleep. I doubt she even remembers what she said."

"I do!" Bridgette cried. "They're all so violent and horrible! I'm not gonna be able to get the images out of my head for days. Maybe even weeks at this rate. So please end this so I can sleep peacefully again!" The surfer girl began to breakdown into tears after voicing her plea.

"Dudes, this is so not cool!" Geoff proclaimed. "Making my girl cry is beyond harshness! You guys need to stop fighting!"

"Why are you making it seem like it's my fault?" Duncan demanded. "It's not like I'm responsible for everyone's troubles."

"You might as well be, punk," LeShawna stated. "What with the way you and your princess have been actin'."

"First of all, no one gets to call her princess accept me, got it?" Duncan growled. "Second, you and your dweeb haven't exactly been acting like saints either. In fact, this is as much Harold's fault as any one else's."

"This crap again?" LeShawna fumed. "Everyone knows the reason why he pulled that stunt back on the island is because you wouldn't stop buggin' him. So it really is your fault for all the trouble that has gone down!"

"I'm gonna say it once and I'm gonna keep saying it, even if it ends up being a thousand times," Duncan stated. "I did not set that whoopee cushion filled with chocolate pudding for you to sit on! If I was gonna make it look like you had a sudden case of diarrhea, I would've done something to make you actually do it."

"You are one sick bastard, Duncan!" LeShawna yelled. "I outta tear out that stupid pin in your brow and jam it up your ass!"

The scene continued onward throughout the remainder of the lunch period. Trent, Geoff, DJ, and Owen trying to hold Duncan back. Eva and Tyler trying to hold LeShawna back. Bridgette burying her face in her arms as she cried. Lindsay appearing as though she was about to do the same depending on what would happen to Tyler. Katie and Sadie locked in their embrace and on the verge of screaming. Virtually everyone else watching in utter horror and fascination at the scene that was going down.

Everyone except Heather.

* * *

**(Confessions Cam)**

Heather - /_Files her nails_./ "The whoopee cushion pudding is hardly my best work. But then again, any little thing would set these people off. Now I just have to amp up the pressure on Courtney and Harold and all will going according to plan."

Duncan - "What is it with people wanting to pin me as being the root of all their problems? Even if my actions were to set off some kinda weird chain of events, that doesn't mean I'm responsible for everything. I'm only responsible for the ones I am directly involved with. The rest is totally on them."

LeShawna - "If that punk wanted to push me as far as I was willin' to go, he managed to succeed. I am now just beggin' for Friday to be here because Chris will surely put us in a position where I get a shot at beating the holy hell outta that f--/**censored**/ delinquent and his stuck up princess."

Bridgette - /_Crying_./ "I can't take it any more! Between the nightmares from all the plotting Courtney does in her sleep to the four of them constantly at each other's throats, it's just too much to bare!" /_Looks over at the "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer and then suddenly rips it off_./ "I just want this to be over with! Someone stop this before it gets worse!"

Eva - /_Stares at the spot where the "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer used to be and snorts a chuckle_./ "Well I'll be damned. Bet she's as upset as when they tried to serve her dolphin wieners back on the island."

Geoff - "This is so not cool, y'all. Bridge is really upset about all this. To the point that she's actually crying. And it makes me sad to see her cry, you know. I'll do anything to see her smile again. Even if it might mean I could end up on Duncan's bad side and he's a pretty cool guy. Sorry dude, but my girl comes first."

DJ - "There's gotta be something I could put up in here to ease all the tension that's been goin' down lately. I'd put a picture up of Bunny, but I'm fresh outta copies. I wish I knew what I could put up..." /T_aps his chin as he things for a moment._/ "I got it! I know exactly what to use."

Chris - /_Looks at the poster hung up in place of the torn down flyer with a raised brow_./ "A little kitten in a coffee mug with a picture of a kitten on it? Do you even know how to try, DJ?"

Lindsay - /_Cooing_./ "Awww! That is the most adorable looking thing in the world!"

Katie - /_Squeals_./ "Ohmygod, Sadie! It is, like, sooo cute!"  
Sadie - /_Also squeals_./ "Beyond cute! It's, like, sooo precious!"  
Katie - "He's so tiny and cute!"  
Sadie - "With those big and cute eyes!"  
Katie - "And he, like, fits perfectly in the mug!"  
Sadie - "With a picture of another cutie on it!"  
Together - "EEEEEEEEEE!!!"

* * *

**(Week 5, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

"It is just, like, so cute and adorable and precious," Katie said very rapidly. "He such such itty bitty paws and those big and cute eyes. Fitting so perfectly in the mug."

"Oh yes, wonderfully cute," Noah said, doing his best to mask any tone of sarcasm in his voice. "Such a tiny little creature."

"Noah," she said, playfully mimicking an attitude toward him as she gently tapped his nose. "Behave."

"Yes, dear," he said back with a smile and a kiss. This resulted in Katie blushing and giggling softly.

In the week and a half since they became a couple, Noah noticed a couple things about his girlfriend he would not have otherwise picked up on. One in particular was her rather impressive ability to detect cynicism. She had tolerated his cynical nature in the past and towards most others since she understood that it was apart of who he was. But right off the bat he knew that he had to draw the line of just how cynical he could be toward her and Sadie. After all, he would not change a thing about Katie since he liked her to be herself. But there were times when he did get annoyed at all the girlish squealing she does about things he himself would find moronic. He just had to make sure she did not catch him displaying such an attitude in her presence.

"But in, like, all honesty," Katie said. "Is that not so the cutest little kitten you've ever seen?"

"I'm pretty certain I can think of one better than that," Noah replied. "My own perky Katie-Kat."

Katie giggled a little more before purring like a cat, playing along to the pet name she had grown to love. She then resumed placing quick kisses repeatedly on his cheek while tightening his embrace on his left arm. With his smile widening, Noah was about to resume reading the book in his right hand when he noticed someone entering the living space. The very person he had been hoping to meet with before the weekend. Their Resident Assistant, Jessica.

"I'm afraid we're gonna have to cut our study session a little short today," Noah said to Katie. "I need to speak with Jessica on a matter that is of a private nature."

Katie pouted before giving out a defeated sigh. "I wish you weren't a part of Courtney's campaign," she said. "She's, like, so mean whenever something is not to her liking."

"Sadly, it's people like her that we all have to deal with in life," he said. "Ambitious to a fault, no-nonsense, and likely to tear apart your innocence right before your eyes. They, unfortunately, make the world go round. But at least I get to be the instrument to her success. Without me, she would be suffering horribly in this race. So I'm too valuable to mistreat foolishly."

"Still doesn't, like, make me any less unhappy," Katie noted.

"Then this'll bring a smile back to your face," Noah stated. "As soon as I'm done speaking with Jessica, I'll swing by your room so you can start fitting me for the suit you're making for me."

"Really?" Katie asked with excitement. When he nodded, she squealed wildly before kissing him repeatedly. "I'm so holding you to that promise, okay? Byeee!" She leaped to her feet and began skipping out of the living space and up into her room. Noah watched her leave before getting up to approach the resident assistant.

"If I may have a word, Jessica," he said.

"Ah, Noah," Jessica said as she turned to face the egghead. "How may be of assistance to a lowly minion of mine?"

"Gracious mistress, I ask but a favor from thee," he said, speaking in a mocking tone. "Though she doesn't know it yet, Courtney wishes for your help in her preparations for Sunday's debate."

"I'm afraid you've come seeking the wrong person regarding politics," she responded. "Never was one to compete in such an arena and would be quite useless to her."

"On the contrary," Noah said. "The politics I've already got covered. Rather, you're the person for us to seek in regards to making one of her opponents feel uncomfortable. An opponent who belongs to a certain club I believe you're familiar with."

"Such rumors are known to be quite outrageous," Jessica said with a raised brow.

"I highly doubt these rumors are outrageous indeed," he answered back. "Particularly when the majority of them regarding your previous membership in the Dodekatheon are true."

"And what makes you think these particular rumors are true?" she asked, showing no sign of intimidation.

"I know a girl who may be crazier than a loon on a Saturday night drinking binge and often times speaks utter nonsense," Noah began to reply. "She does, however, have a keen ability in finding things out about people from the most unlikely of places. Both Chris and Chef can tell you all about it, if they haven't already."

There was a slight pause before Jessica finally spoke in response. "So what makes this a favor rather than an attempt to blackmail me?" she asked, still showing little sign of being intimidated.

"I figured that by helping Courtney make their political girl look like an incompetent fool before the entire student body, it'll be small, yet satisfying form of payback for the suffering they caused you," Noah answered.

"This being a favor, however, means there's no incentive for me to accept your offer," she pointed out. "Because you're not blackmailing me, there is no reason for me not to turn you down and force Courtney to figure out on her own how to damage Chelsea's image right before the vote."

"True enough," he agreed. "Although I'm sure you would like nothing more than to stick it to the same group of people that allowed their Zeus to harm you in humiliating fashion."

"So you're really playing up the memory of such a dark day in my life in the hopes of convincing me to help Courtney knock them around a bit in the debate," Jessica summarized. She then took a minor second to pause for effect. "I'll do it on one condition. Courtney has to agree to do something for me when I ask for it. And she's probably not going to like it."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a picture of a kitten inside a mug with the face of a kitten)**

Noah - "Trying to blackmail her would have been a bad idea since the majority of students around here already know about what happened to her. Even her boyfriend. So I instead took the risk of trying to convince her to help us through playing up the remembrance of that day. Unfortunately, it was a risk for a reason."

Courtney - "I have to do whatever it is that Jessica asks me to when the time comes?" /_Pauses for a moment before she sighs._/ "I sure hope Noah knows what he's doing. He has been a great campaign manager up to this point. But I really am not all that comfortable with having to owe a favor to our Resident Assistant just for something I can use against her in the debate."

Jessica - "It was a little over year ago. It was far from a pleasant experience. I haven't really gotten over it, though Jackson has been very helpful in at least easing some of the emotional suffering. Still, it's not something one could easily forget. So talking me into helping Courtney just so I can give those moth--/censored/ a little bit of payback? Well played, Noah. Well played."

* * *

**(Week 5, Day 6 - Thursday)**

"I KNEW IT ALL ALONG!" came the all too familiar shrills of Courtney. "YOU ARE A NO GOOD FU--/**censored**/ CHEATER!"

"Now you are just coming up with excuses!" Harold yelled back. "Every little thing I do now is a cause for you to think it will some how undermine your pathetic career!"

To witness Courtney and Harold going at it was like a train wreck. It was horrifying, but no one could look away. Almost everyone stuck their heads out of their respective rooms to see what Courtney and Harold were going off about this time around. It was by chance that neither Duncan nor LeShawna were around, or the scene would certainly have been a lot worse.

"I am not making excuses when what I say is true!" Courtney countered. "You have the exact same answers on your biology assignment as I do!"

"And how is that supposed to be cheating?" Harold demanded. "Of course we are going to have the exact same answers because we are both smart enough to know the correct answers to the questions!"

"It is not because we have the same answers!" Courtney stated. "It is because you have the absolute same answers as I do, word for word! You are some how copying me and are therefore cheating!"

"So you are accusing me of cheating just because you saw the answer to one question and it just so happened to be the same as yours!" Harold summarized. "You did not even bother to look at the rest of the sheet! You are calling me a cheater just because of one stupid little answer to one stupid little question!"

"A-ha!" Courtney cried. "You do not deny that the answers are written exactly the same! Therefore, you admit to cheating!"

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Harold fumed. "I would not dare cheat! I certainly would not dare cheat by using your answers! Your answers are probably the most incomprehensive streams of writing ever! How you are considered smart with the way you write is beyond me!"

The swipe of Courtney's hand, particularly her finger nails, just barely grazed his nose. One would be hard pressed to notice that there was possibly a very tiny cut upon his skin. But that would still be the least of worries. Courtney was about to take another swing when she was tackled back away from Harold by Gwen and shortly later a tried Bridgette. Trent immediately rushed in to keep Harold from making any sort of counter attack.

"LET ME GO!" Courtney shrieked. "I AM GOING TO KILL HIM!"

"She tried to cut me open!" Harold hollered. "I deserve to hit her back!"

"How dare you demand to hit me!" Courtney screamed. "You already did that last week!"

"Guys, please stop!" Bridgette pleaded. "This is getting way too far out of hand!"

"You know we can't keep doing this, right Gwen?" Trent theorized aloud.

"I've started to notice that, actually," Gwen answered back. "We need a permanent solution."

"The permanent solution would be to release me so I can beat the living snot out of that cheating a--/**censored**/!" Courtney cried.

"You have been pushing your weight around for too long!" Harold proclaimed. "It is well past time some one put you in your place and it seems like I am the only one willing to do that!"

"Neither one of you is helping," Trent noted.

"That's it, I'm left with no choice," Gwen declared. "Let 'em go on the count of three."

"Gwen, you can't!" Bridgette cried.

"One..." Gwen began to count.

"I hope you know what you're doing, babe," Trent said.

"Two..." Gwen continued.

"Gwen, please!" Bridgette begged. "This is not going to help!"

"Three!" Gwen shouted.

She released her hold on Courtney as did Trent release his on Harold. Bridgette tried to maintain her hold, but was too physically weak to do so and was forced to let go. Courtney and Harold were about to make a start toward one another. They would find themselves not getting very far.

"Izzy!" Gwen called.

Courtney and Harold stopped just a few feet away from one another. Their eyes shooting up in horror as they realized whose room they found themselves standing in front of. Barely a second passed before a giant wave of water burst through the door and slammed into the two, drenching them both from head to toe and leaving them lying on the ground.

There was only enough water to knock them down, but then that was idea. The crazy redhead emerged from her room. Dressed in military clothing and wearing a pair of sunglasses and a cowboy hat. She stood with her fists placed upon her hips and took a big whiff with a smile on her face.

"Izzy loves the smell of napalm in the morning," she stated.

"First, there is no napalm," Gwen pointed out. "Second, it's the afternoon. But never mind." The goth girl turned her attention away the redhead to the two downed bodies on the floor. "You guys either need to put a stop to this madness or we will unleash madness upon you. From now on, every time you two, even Duncan and LeShawna, are about to throw it down, we're calling in Izzy. Now we know we can't do anything about the Friday challenges, but outside of that you guys better start acting civil around one another no matter how much you hate each other's guts."

"Your arguments and fighting have started affecting everyone else around here," Trent added. "Bridgette is having nightmares of the things you talk about in your sleep, Courtney. Cody is sure you're going to break the book shelf you've been punching and thereby destroy everything that's on it, Harold."

"That's just the tip of the iceberg," Gwen pointed out. "There are a number of other things that your fighting has done that quite frankly I'd rather not make mention of it. Way too disturbing. More so than just about anything Izzy and Owen do together."

"Look, just put a stop to all this fighting, alright?" Trent asked. "It's too much for us to handle now and we really want you guys to end the matter right away. We will use Izzy if we have to."

Courtney and Harold looked back at Gwen and Trent for a moment. Then the two glared at one another with intense hatred. Finally, they glance over in concern at Izzy. The redhead simply stood still with a smile on her face. Held behind her back, though, was the giant bazooka-sized water gun she had stolen from the show staff. The same water gun she had sprayed them with earlier in the week. And both knew she would be more than happy to use it again.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "Here's to hoping that this does the trick because I am completely out of ideas."

Bridgette - "I just hope this leads to Courtney no longer talking in her sleep about what she wants to do to Harold."

Trent - "If any one can end a violent war, it's Izzy."

Izzy - /_Looks very excited._/ "Hotrod Hampton, meta-fictional comic relief character, carefully lays out the premise of his hilarious comedy bit. Now, Hotrod expands on the premise, leaving the reader to wonder, 'Where is he going with this?' Oh, just you wait. Hotrod then executes a deft reductio ad absurdum, taking the joke to a level that lesser comic relief characters can only dream of. And now, he sets the reader up for the punch line, creating a world of comic suspense by remaining totally silent in the next five seconds. You could cut the comedic tension with a knife!" /_Waits silently for five seconds and then opens her mouth to speak before_--/

Chris - /_Snickers_./ "Wait until they see what I've got in store for them tomorrow. It's gonna be awesome!"

Izzy - /_Looks miffed_./ "Why do they always have to mess with Hotrod Hampton's comedic timing?"

* * *

Confession Cam Decorations to date:

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner

* * *

I'm getting there. It won't be this up coming challenge, but very soon I will be able to do a particular challenge I'm doing to do. This up coming challenge will be fun, at least I think it will. But the challenge I'm dying to do will be so much more sweeter. I will keep trying to throw in more decorations, but I might need a little help with that. I asked many chapters back for ideas on what decorations to fill the Confession Cam with and I don't believe I have had any responses. I think now would be a good time to see some ideas flow, people. This place needs to be littered with junk. And don't forget to keep sending in those reviews. The more reviews, the merrier. I want to be reading reviews while I piece together the next chapter so that I have some reason to keep going, alright? There was a lack of reviews in the last chapter and I really wanna know what you guys think of the story so far. You got it?

---

**Next Up:** Is the sun going to rise tomorrow?


	17. Week 5, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Seventeen

---

**(Week 5, Day 7 - Friday)**

"Does any body know what time it is?" Chris asked the crowd. He cupped his hand around his ear to listen to their response.

"CHALLENGE NIGHT!" the audience cried before exploding in cheers, screams, and whistles.

"Correct-o-mondo!" Chris stated heartily. "It's Friday night here on Total Drama Academy, so it's time to make our twenty-two students suffer like only reality television can!"

"That's putting it mildly," Noah muttered under his breath.

"Tonight's challenge will be a rather special one," Chris continued. "There will be, however, a few minor alterations." He then quickly glared at Gwen for a quick second. "All because of the results to last week. So may I ask our four-- not two, but four-- lucky winners to please step up, front and center at this time."

Katie began to squeal as she tugged Noah by the arm in compliance to the host's request. Gwen and Trent merely shrugged and followed their co-winners to a spot at the center of the stage. All four received a wave of ovation from the crowd.

"Congratulations to Gwen, Katie, Noah, and Trent managing to get through last week's challenge with barely a scratch," Chris announced. "In addition to the 'generous' prize you won, you four will also be sitting out from competing this week."

"Wow, two weeks in a row of the winners not having to compete," Gwen noted somewhat sarcastically. "I'm shocked."

"I'm a fair man, Gwen," Chris said.

"I doubt it," she retorted quietly.

"Since you four will not be participating this week, why don't you guys sit back and relax on this here comfy couch," Chris said, patting the arm of the couch next to him. "Don't worry, we won't be pulling your legs tonight. The fun is reserved for those who will be in the challenge."

Katie once again squealed and again dragged Noah by the arm to the couch. Gwen and Trent lightly chuckled at the sight before joining them. Noah sat back in a relaxing position while Katie nestled herself against him with her legs upon his lap. Trent was simply content with wrapping his arm around Gwen's shoulders.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Trent - "It's nice for me and Gwen to not have to compete for a night. Sure we're sharing it with Noah and Katie, but it's a good time for us to just sit back and relax."

Gwen - /_Giggles uncharacteristically._/ "God, it's so hard to keep from acting all girly when it comes to Trent. I did have my doubts about hooking up with someone who wasn't a goth. But that's the great thing about Trent. Him being him is very alluring." /_She pauses for a moment before glancing over at the _9_ movie poster having been placed next to the kitten picture._/ "Okay, so he has a few habits that's a little silly, like his nine obsession. But then no one's perfect."

Duncan - /_Stares at_ 9_ movie poster with a curious brow raised._/ "So lemme get this straight. This 9 is an animated movie while there is another Nine that came out the same year, but is actually some sort of musical from the guy who did Chicago. What's wrong with those Americans, man?"

* * *

"Now then, let's get to the good stuff," Chris stated. "We will start by dividing every up into four teams. Chef, why don't you announce who will be partnering with who."

Chef pulled out a clipboard and snorted. "When I call your name, step up and stand at attention!" he barked. "Team Iron will consist of the following punks. Bridgette! Geoff! Izzy! Owen!"

"Alright, babe!" Geoff cheered before scooping Bridgette into arms so that they could engage in another game of tonsil hockey. Izzy and Owen gleefully copied their partners by forcing their own faces into one another. This resulted in a series of out of sync chanting of Izzy's name from her male fans, much to the further confusion of the handsome host.

"Sheesh, it's like you kids can't spend two minutes without sucking face," Chris commented. "Chef, if you may continue."

"Team Undefined Mad Men will consist of the following," Chef stated. "Eva! Justin! Lindsay! Tyler!"

Lindsay cheered and jumped into Tyler's arms. Tyler's smile widened given where he found his face mere inches away from. Eva grunted in disappointment, giving a dark glare at Justin. The model did not even bother to pay attention to anything other than the reflection in his handheld mirror.

"Team Leftovers will consist of the following," Chef continued. "Beth! Cody! DJ! Sadie!"

The four students whose names were called merely smiled nervously before stepping up on the stage. Sadie started to get a little more excited when Katie cheered her on.

"And then there's Team Half-N-Half," Chef announced. "They consist of the following. Courtney! Duncan! Harold! LeShawna!" There was a large, collective gasp from the audience. Their reaction paled in comparison to that of the four students named.

"You frontin' me?" LeShawna hollered.

"You can't be serious!" Courtney shrieked.

"You're making me and LeShawna partner with them?" Harold yelled.

"One of these days, I'm kicking all your asses for this!" Duncan threatened.

"This is going to be so awesome, I can hardly contain myself," Chris laughed. "So there we have it folks! Team Iron, Team UMM, Team Leftovers, and Team Half-N-Half."

"This is completely unfair!" Courtney complained. "Undermining my right to achieve my career goals just for kicks!"

"I aim to please," Chris responded.

"I dunno what's worse," LeShawna groaned. "Having to actually work with Ms. Prissy-Pants or having to rely on her."

"You think we're enjoying this?" Duncan growled. "I hate the both of you. Why the hell should we even consider working with the two of you as a team?"

"Gosh!" Harold yelled in anger. "Could you, like, not go two minutes without putting us down? It's already bad enough that we don't have a choice in having to be your partners!"

"This is going to be great," Chris snickered. "They're already about to come to blows and the challenge hasn't even started yet."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a 9 Movie Poster)**

LeShawna - "When this is all over, I'm gonna kick Chris' pampered ass from here to Florida!"

Harold - "This is getting so tiresome. What is so exciting about me and LeShawna at odds with Courtney and Duncan? It's bad enough when we bring trouble unto ourselves, so why force feed it?"

Courtney - "One of these days, I am suing the hell out of Chris. For the past several weeks, he intentionally makes me and Duncan compete against Harold and LeShawna simply because he finds it amusing and as a cheap trick to draw ratings. Now he's forcing us to work together, knowing full well that at any second we would rather rip each other's throats. The man is a sick bastard and I hope he gets what's coming to him!"

* * *

"Hey, wait a minute," Beth said. "What about Heather and Ezekiel?"

"Good question," Chris responded. "You get a cookie!" Jessica tossed Beth a rainbow cookie, resulting in a quarter of the audience cheering. The handsome host stared at the audience for a second before giving out a shrug. "Any way, our looo-sers will indeed be participating in the competition. They will each be on opposing teams during one of our match-ups. And the good news is that we will be dropping the disadvantage stipulation for this week. Because the challenge is already awesome enough, we really don't need to have it. To determine all of this, we will have our four non-participants take a spin of... The Random Loser Generator!"

"Is it just me, or has Chris chucked originality right out the window," Noah stated to the other three on the couch while Chef pushed the giant wheel toward them.

"Since when has Chris ever been original?" Gwen retorted in return.

"Touché," Noah said.

"Let's start with Noah and Katie," Chris continued. "They will be spinning to determine which teams will be facing off one another first based on players the arrow lands on. Noah, how about you go first."

"Whatever," Noah said. Without much effort, Noah spun the wheel. The audience cheered for as long as it continued to spin, which wasn't very long. Soon enough, the wheel came to a stop.

"And the arrow lands on Sadie," Chris announced. "Which means Team Leftovers will be competing in our first match. Katie, will you spin the wheel to determine who they will face?"

"I hope it's not someone tough for Sadie," Katie squeaked before spinning the wheel as hard as she could. The wheel did not spin as along as previously, reaching the end in a short amount of time.

"So the first match will pit Sadie and Team Leftovers against Justin and Team UMM," Chris announced. "Which means our main event is going to be so wicked, because it will feature Team Iron and Team Half-N-Half. I love it!"

"I bet you do," Duncan grumbled. Courtney had been giving Chris a death glare since the announcement of who her teammates was and had not blinked ever since.

"Now, we will have Gwen and Trent determine which match-up our looo-sers will be participating in," Chris continued. "Let's have Gwen take a spin first."

"Gee, I'd thought you'd never ask," Gwen said sarcastically before spinning the wheel. She did not put a lot of effort into the spin, but it lasted for a good while before it finally came to a stop.

"Looks like we'll be seeing the looo-sers participate in our first match-up as the arrow lands on Beth," Chris announced. "And that's a good thing, because we want to keep the drama of Half-N-Half all to themselves."

"That's right, laugh it up while you can," LeShawna muttered.

"Trent, how about deciding who will be partnered with Team Leftovers, will ya buddy?" Chris asked.

"If you say so," Trent said with a shrug before spinning the wheel. The wheel spun for a good long while before it came to a complete stop. The arrow pointing at someone who clearly was not happy.

"I can't believe I have to play some stupid game with a bunch of twerps!" Heather seethed.

"Luck of the spin, Heather," Chris chuckled. "And so, Heather will be in Team Leftovers while Ezekiel will be in Team UMM. So go ahead and join your teammates while I fill our audience in on tonight's challenge. This week, our eighteen students will be competing in a little something we like to call... Arena!"

The lights dimmed slightly and a holographic image appeared in the center of the stage before the students, leaving the audience in awe. The hologram showed off a series of pixelated images that showcased, among others, gunfire.

"Our students will be hooked up to some virtual reality simulators we have set up in one of the back rooms of the building where they will compete in a couple of classic computer games," Chris summarized. "Our students will be finding themselves beating the living snot out of one another in _MechWarrior 4: Black Knight_, _Tactical Ops: Assault on Terror_, and _Star Wars: Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast_. So if we can have our..." Chris trailed off when he noticed something that seemed very much out of the ordinary. "Izzy, what's with the hat?"

"Cool, isn't it?" Izzy said, running her fingers long the rim of the pointy green witch-like hat that she wore. "It goes along great with my clothes, which is one of the best-designed ever, don't you think?"

"Aren't those the same clothes you wore on the island?" Chris pointed out.

"Uh-huh," Izzy nodded. "From a theatrical point of view, it's perfect for who I am and what I do. It's all about contradictions. Like the hole here. The hole draws the eyes precisely where everyone knows they're not supposed to look, putting anyone I'm dealing with off-balance. I seem like a girl, but with the clothes I'm all woman. And not just woman, I mean. It says, 'I'm tough enough to hand everything I am. Are you?'"

Chris and most of the other students on the stage merely stared at Izzy with bewilderment while her male fans once again chant her name out of sync. Chris looked over to Chef and Jessica and twirled a finger over his head while pointing his thumb over at the redhead in question.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "Somewhere someone noted that a genius is nothing more than another form of insanity. That being so intelligent results in utter loss of reality simply because no one else can match their level of intellect. I believe Izzy is living proof of this."

Beth - "Lately Izzy has been rambling just these random statements at least once a day. I really don't know where she comes up with this stuff. And to be honest, I don't I wanna know, actually."

Izzy - "Things are going to change in a big way when Winston Borkus is King of the greater Newark area. For one thing, he's finally going to wow northern New Jersey with his latest invention... Electric fish! These electric fish, man, they've been plaguing him for years. See, the thing about these damn electric fish is that they keep crapping out as soon as he puts them in water. Something to do with wires, I think. But seriously, once Winston Borkus is King, this stuff is all going to get worked out. Did he mention that he's going to be the Duke of Hoboken, the Baron of Berkeley Heights, and the Earl of Parsippany?" /_Pauses for a moment, as if waiting for a response from the camera. She then ducks down, coming back up to put what appears to be an electric fish onto the Z Necklace._/ "But seriously, man, electric fish? That's going to be a slam dunk!"

* * *

"Right..." the handsome host began to say. "As I was saying. If our eighteen students could please exit the stage toward their designated doors and begin setting up for participation in the challenge." Before the eighteen students could even do anything, a series of large mean in suits and ties, wearing sunglasses and looking rather similar to Mr. Black in every possible way, grabbed them all and carried them through their designated doors. "While they're getting them situated into our virtual reality systems, Jessica will explain the scoring system."

"Thank you, Chris," Jessica said. "In each match, there are five possible points to be won. Each match is broken up into three games, which are broken into three rounds. The team with the most points wins the match. Points are awarded based on the following criteria: Each game is worth one point, the team with the most total accumulated kills will win one point, and the team with the Match Most Valuable Player will win the final point."

"If you missed any of that, you've got nobody but yourself to blame, mister," Chris stated. He then glared at someone in the audience. "And don't give me that look!"

"This should be interesting," Gwen said to the others on the couch. "I highly doubt more than a tenth of us even know how to play a video game, so I'm looking forward to seeing how people like Heather try to figure this one out."

"What's with the team names, though?" Trent asked curiously. "Half-N-Half, Iron, Leftovers. Doesn't really make all that much sense, if you ask me."

"Think about it," Noah said. "You'll noticed that most of the teams are paired up of the same four people who were grouped together in last week's challenge. With the exception of Team Leftover, comprised of four people mixed together."

"That's not a nice name to give Sadie's team," Katie pouted.

"I highly doubt Chris thought about whether or not a team name would hurt people's feelings," Noah pointed out. "Team UMM, or Undefined Mad Men, could mean Eva."

"Be glad she wasn't here to catch what you said," Trent said.

"Whatever," Noah said. "Team Iron can mean Izzy. Or Owen. Or both, now that I think about it. Who knows how much iron is in that large gut of Owen's and it's possible there's some iron in Izzy's head."

"As for Half-N-Half?" Gwen noted.

"Oh, I'm sure that one was specially reserved for those four," Noah said.

"I believe our students have figured out how to operate the virtual reality systems, so let's get this party started!" Chris announced to the roar of the audience. "Our four lucky non-competitors will be sitting back and commentating over the festivities tonight. Since Gwen and Noah are among them, we're sure to be in for some great lines tonight. We'll kick things off with Team UMM against Team Leftovers in _MechWarrior 4: Black Knight_. Jessica will explain the functions of the game and which map our first match will be taking place in."

"_MechWarrior_ finds out contestants playing in giant mechanical robots, or mechs," Jessica began to explain. "There are various mechs of shapes and sizes, each with suited specialties that the students will need to quickly figure out in order to execute a proper game plan. If a player gets killed during the game, he will have to wait five seconds before he can respawn and jump back into the fight. Both matches will have the students competing in Capture The Flag. The round is won by a team who captures the most amount of flags under a specific time period, which itself is best of three even though we'll have them playing all three rounds. UMM and Leftovers will be having their match take place in the map called Lakeside."

"Our players are ready to go, so let's head into the arena!" Chris proclaimed, to which the audience cheered wildly.

* * *

**Match 1**

**UMM vs. Leftovers**

**Game 1**

**MechWarrior 4: Black Knight**

**Round 1**

Eva: Lindsay and I will make a run for the flag. You three set up defensive positions.

Ezekiel: Um... 'ookay.

Tyler: If you say so. But isn't Lindsay in a bigger mech?

Lindsay: This is so neat. I'm running around in a lake and I'm not getting wet!

Justin: ...

Noah: And Justin shows great enthusiasm about playing this game.

Trent: At least he's not a flag runner. Otherwise, they'd be a step closer to being in serious trouble.

Gwen: What's to say they're not in trouble already? The only other option is for him to defend and he wouldn't know someone was passing by him unless they had a camera.

Heather: Okay, someone stay behind to guard our flag. The rest of us will go for the other team's flag. Who wants to do what?

DJ: I don't feel comfortable going out there with all the firing that's about to go on. I think I'll stay here.

Sadie: Me too. It'll be, like, so scary to try to get their flag.

Beth: Maybe I should stay behind in case they need help.

Heather: You're all pathetic. Guess I'm going for the flag.

Cody: I'll do that to. I have some experience playing this game a little.

Eva: Heads up, guys. I'm at their base and getting the flag.

Sadie: Oh no! Someone's going after our flag! Do something, DJ!

DJ: I dunno what to do!

Eva: I got the flag and they don't even know how to fire at me. This is too easy, guys.

Trent: Do the defenders even know Eva's in their base?

Gwen: She's looking back like she's wondering if they know she's there.

Noah: Hello, Team Leftovers. My name is Noah. You might want to watch the guys taking your flag.

Katie: Noah, be nice. Sadie's on that team.

Cody: I got the flag, but I'm taking fire! I need help!

Heather: Hang on, I'm coming.

Tyler: Oh yeah! Zeke and I got this one covered, dudes!

Ezekiel: S'oory, C'oody.

Noah: Hi, Cody. My name is Noah. You might want to use your jump-jets to get out of the way, big guy, because you got the entire team going after you. You're in a lightweight mech. You're not safe. Turns out water doesn't stop lasers and missile fire.

Trent: Cody's not going to see the other side of the lake, is he Gwen?

Gwen: Nope. I don't think so. Oh, by the way, Eva just scored.

Eva: Okay, new strategy. Everyone on defense, I'll just get the flag alone. These guys don't know how to play this game.

Cody: Aw, man. I got blown up.

Heather: The flag dropped where you went down so I'll pick it up after I take out this twerp right here.

Beth: Are you sure that's a good idea, Heather? I mean, he is in a bigger mech than your's.

Heather: I doubt Zeke would know a thing about video games.

Tyler: So your good with the controls I taught you before, right dude?

Ezekiel: I think s'oo.

Katie: Look! Heather and Ezekiel are going at it.

Gwen: Now, Heather is a nice small mech. She's not going to have any trouble going up against Zeke's madcat there. That's not a problem at all.

Trent: Heather's not going to see the other side of the lake either, is she?

Noah: No, she isn't.

Heather: Goddammit! I bet he got lucky with which buttons to push.

Jessica: Time's up! First round is over.

Noah: Zero kills. Leftovers rock. Zero kills.

Katie: Noah!

* * *

**Round 2**

Eva: Remember guys, the rest of you just play defense. They can't guard a flag worth their lives.

Beth: Come on, DJ! She's going after the flag! Stop her!

DJ: I'm trying, but I can't aim straight!

Trent: And Eva runs around DJ like he wasn't even there.

Gwen: Hey DJ, this is Gwen. Noah thinks you should get your head out of your butt.

Katie: Gwen!

Gwen: What? I'm only saying what your boyfriend was going to say.

Noah: Maybe they'll listen to her cause they certainly don't listen to me.

Heather: I'm about to get their-- Crap! I'm trapped!

Tyler: Let's take her out, man!

Ezekiel: I think I'm gettin' the hang 'oof this, eh.

Heather: Uh! This absolutely sucks! I'm taken out again!

Eva: Alright, we got a captured flag scored. Lindsay, I think I saw an enemy mech approaching. Try to take it out, okay.

Lindsay: Uh... You want me to take it out to dinner?

Tyler: No, this is how you motivate my babe. Hey Linds! Heather's coming after your flag!

Lindsay: What? She's not having my flag!

Cody: What the? Oh my gosh! Lindsay's firing at me! And she's connecting!

Gwen: Oh, I think I know how this ends.

Katie: Cody's got the flag!

Gwen: Okay, maybe I was wrong. Maybe Co... Okay, turns out I was right.

Cody: Aw, man. I'm toast.

Noah: Hi Cody, this is Noah. You should try to run around faster, maybe use some jump-jets.

Katie: Doesn't he, like, know he has jump-jets?

Noah: Turns out he doesn't.

Gwen: Look, here's Eva. Again. With the flag. Again. And looks like she's gonna score.

Gwen, Noah, Katie, Trent: Again!

Jessica: Time is up on round two, kiddies.

Tyler: So just sit there and blow people up.

Lindsay: Okay.

Tyler: That's all you gotta do, babe.

Lindsay: Okay.

* * *

**Round 3**

Heather: Okay, so we're clearly not going to win this game. So we need to rack up some kills and MVP points, people! We need to take them all out! Got it?

Sadie: Can't, like, DJ and I stay here in defense?

Heather: No! We don't have a choice any more! We have to attack! Watch! I'm gonna take out this dweeb who doesn't know a joystick from a tree branch!

Trent: Oh, Heather just took a big hit there from Zeke.

Gwen: And now she goes down.

Heather: Goddammit!

Ezekiel: I'm really gettin' the hang 'oof this, eh!

Eva: Flags open. I might as well get it.

Cody: Everyone go after Eva! She's got the flag!

Trent: Ouch. Cody's getting railed on by Lindsay.

Noah: Okay, normally this is where the smaller mech uses jump-jets or run around. But turns out Cody likes to run immediately into the large, heavy mech that's kicking his butt.

Gwen: Oh, and Eva just scored. In case any one was interested.

Katie: How come Cody's not going after the flag? He was looking right at it.

Noah: I guess Cody's strategy is to bite as badly as he possibly can.

Trent: Well, he finally exploded.

Jessica: And that ends the game, everyone.

Gwen: Well, there definitely was a pattern to that game.

Noah: Eva gets the flag. Eva scores. Repeat as necessary.

Heather: We should have done the flip side. Cody and I should have defended with heavy mechs and you guys should have gone for the flags. Since it turns out we couldn't run either.

* * *

"So we end the first game for the UMM vs. Leftovers match-up with UMM ahead one game to none," Chris announced. "Not to mention they're clearly in control on both kills and MVP points. Leftovers has a lot of work to do if they want stay in the game. But right now, it's time for Team Iron and Team Half-N-Half to duke it out in _MechWarrior 4_."

"The rules remain the same for this game," Jessica noted. "The only difference is the map. Team Iron and Team Half-N-Half will be competing on the map called Timberline."

* * *

**Match 2**

**Iron vs. Half-N-Half**

**Game 1**

**MechWarrior 4: Black Knight**

**Round 1**

Geoff: Okay, dudes. Let's have Owen and I playing defense while Izzy and Bridge run offense. Everyone cool with that?

Bridgette: Sounds good to me.

Owen: Does that mean I don't have to run?

Izzy: Izzy will capture flag before enemy know it!

LeShawna: Unless someone comes up with a better plan, I'd say Harold and Prissy-Pants be the flag runners while the punk and I hold back and defend.

Courtney: Can we just knock off with the name calling? We don't like each other, but we have to tolerate and work together if we have any chance of winning this.

Duncan: Whatever. Let's just get this over with.

Harold: Heads up. Bridgette's making a run for the flag, guys.

Duncan: I got her.

Courtney: Let's not take any chances. I may not be defending, but I think we should both take her.

Bridgette: Okay, okay, okay. So this is to fire lasers. This is to fire missiles. Ah, here we go. Jump-jets.

Duncan: Ah, crap! Malibu has the flag!

LeShawna: I'm on her!

Bridgette: Jump-jets again. I think I'm getting the hang of this. Hey guys, I'm almost back at the--

Duncan: Got her!

Bridgette: Oh no! I got blindsided!

Trent: Duncan isn't really hitting Bridgette with any real effectiveness...

Gwen: Except for that one shot.

Bridgette: Shoot! I'm out.

Harold: Guard the flag, Duncan.

Duncan: What does it look like I'm doing, dw-- Ah, crap!

Geoff: No one takes out my babe and gets away with it!

Bridgette: Aww! That's so sweet of you, sweetie!

Duncan: G'ah! I'm out.

Trent: Looks like the heat from the explosion caused a cool down for Geoff and his mech powered down.

Katie: He's dropped the flag and, like, doesn't realize it!

Noah: Wait a second. He's either just realized he doesn't have it or he's carving "Geoff loves Bridgette" into that tree.

Gwen: Too bad they're not on one of those snowy maps.

Katie: Eeeee! He's got the flag again!

Trent: Just what would he do in a snowy environment, Gwen?

Gwen: He'd carve "Geoff loves Bridgette" into the snow.

Trent: Ah.

Noah: How about that. A heavy mech scores a flag capture.

Jessica: And time is up on this round.

Geoff: Woo-hoo!

Bridgette: Alright, Geoff!

Gwen: It's probably a good thing they can't kiss as mechs. Otherwise, it would be a long wait before they could get the next round started up.

Noah: Not to mention very awkward.

Gwen: I'm sure that wouldn't stop Izzy and Owen from trying, though.

Noah: Now that would be disturbing.

* * *

**Round 2**

Katie: Ohmygod! That's, like, such a cute group photo opportunity for Team Half-N-Half right there.

Gwen: Say "Arena" everybody.

Katie: "Arena!"

Izzy: Izzy about to enter enemy base, over.

LeShawna: How the hell did she get there so fast?

Trent: Izzy's managing to zig-zag some of LeShawna's shots.

Katie: Doesn't look very worried, does she?

Gwen: Doesn't look worried at all and gives off a few shots of her own.

Noah: She picks up the flag right in front of LeShawna and then runs right into her. That's Izzy alright. Meanwhile, LeShawna shoots angrily into the ground.

LeShawna: I cannot believe that white girl managed to get in and out without gettin' hit!

Geoff: Alright, guys! Defense positions!

Courtney: I have not gotten any openings at the flag!

Harold: Me neither. These guys are tough. Maybe they've played this game before.

Courtney: An unfair advantage!

Duncan: Quit complaining, Princess. We have to take out Izzy before she gets back to her base.

LeShawna: Too late.

Izzy: Touchdown! Izzy scores!

Jessica: Time's up.

Gwen: Well, that was eventful.

Noah: Almost as eventful as the last game.

Gwen: Not really. At least in the last game, the opposition stunk the place up so bad it was entertaining.

Noah: Good point.

* * *

**Round 3**

Katie: Oh look! Izzy, like, already has Half-N-Half's flag!

LeShawna: I don't believe this! We barely started the round and she already has the flag?

Duncan: I'm on her.

Harold: About time! I got the flag!

Trent: Looks like Harold knows how to use jump-jets, too.

Noah: Unfortunately, Geoff scored a nice mid-air hit on him.

Duncan: Izzy's badly hurt, guys. I think I can take her out.

Izzy: Owen! I got an idea!

Katie: Ohmygod! Izzy just exploded!

Trent: She wasn't hit with anything when she went down.

Gwen: Wait a minute. Look at that.

Noah: Izzy self-destructs so a fresh Owen can pick up the flag right away? That's impressive.

Bridgette: Go, Owen! Go!

Duncan: Aw, crap! These guys have played before!

Harold: I think I can score. I don't have anyone--

Geoff: Got him!

Harold: Gosh!

Courtney: Everyone gang up on Owen! He's moving too slow to get back into his base in time!

LeShawna: You are not gonna score on us this time, big guy!

Trent: Owen does know there's a time limit here, right?

Gwen: Uh, apparently not. He's not turning around and the entirety of Half-N-Half continues to rain damage down on him.

Katie: Do you think he's, like, made of armor?

Noah: I guess so.

Duncan: That's it. I'm finishing him off right now.

Trent: This should be interesting. Duncan is closing the gap between himself and Owen.

Noah: Gotta give Owen credit. He's fighting back. Both of them are seriously damaged.

Duncan: I may be going down, but you're not gonna score on me!

Gwen: Well, both mechs are destroyed.

Katie: Hey, there's Izzy!

Izzy: Hello boys! I'm back!

LeShawna: Where the hell did she come from?

Courtney: Slow her down! She won't have enough time to score!

Bridgette: Come on, Izzy! Come on!

Jessica: Time's up.

Geoff, Bridgette: Ahhh!

Izzy: Izzy didn't score? Izzy is vexed.

Duncan: Well, that game sucked.

LeShawna: And how would you do differently?

Duncan: I'd probably somehow get three of those guys into the bathroom and beat them unconscious before the round.

* * *

"That was a rather exciting third round in that game, folks," Chris announced. "Goes to show that, even if the game is lost, you do what you can to rack up those secondary points. Iron clearly won the first two rounds, but neither team scored a captured flag in the third round. To determine the winner of the round, we figure out which team had the most kills. Jessica?"

"Our calculations have Half-N-Half winning the third round for scoring three more kills than Iron," Jessica announced.

"So we have Team UMM and Team Iron leading in their respective match-ups one to nothing," Chris summarized. "But we're not through yet, folks. Our next game is up and running into the system and this will certainly be a doozy for our contents. Jessica, please explain what our players will be in store for when they play _Tactical Ops: Assault on Terror_."

"_Tactical Ops_ will see one team play allied soldiers while another team will take the role of terrorists," Jessica explained. "Instead of capture the flag, each game will have a different form of objectives the teams will need to accomplish. Of course, they could always disregard their objectives. Because they is no respawning in this game, teams could attempt to win the round instead by eliminating all of their opponents."

"But that never happens," Chris noted. Then he raised a brow and formed a smirk on his face. "Or does it?"

"Any way," Jessica uttered while rolling her eyes. "In our first match, Team UMM will take on the role of the terrorists and Team Leftovers will be the allies. UMM will be tasked with planting and setting off a bomb in one of two bomb sites. Leftovers will need to either prevent UMM from planting the bomb or end up defusing it before it explodes. The map they will be competing on in this game is called Blister."

* * *

**Match 1**

**UMM vs. Leftovers**

**Game 2**

**Tactical Ops: Assault on Terror**

**Round 1**

Eva: Alright guys, where are we going?

Lindsay: Let's go to the first one.

Justin: So... that means we're going to Bomb Site A?

Tyler: Sounds good to me. Let's roll.

Ezekiel: Don't y'oo mean m'oov?

Cody: Let's split up. Three of us head to Bomb Site A, the others head to B.

Sadie: I wanna go to A because it looks easier to get there.

DJ: I wanna go to A since I'll be with more folks.

Heather: Please tell me you're not gonna chicken out in this game like you did the last one.

Beth: Okay, how about Heather, Sadie, and DJ go to A, Cody and I will go to B. That sound fair?

Gwen: You know, I hear Bomb Site A is where the party at.

Noah: That's where you get jiggy.

Katie: Is that, like, the only place you get jiggy?

Gwen: That's the only place on this map you can get jiggy at.

Tyler: Keep your eyes open, guys. And don't forget, friendly fire is active in this one.

Heather: Here they come!

Justin: Great. I'm the first one dead.

Heather: Okay, let's just push forward and--

DJ: There's more!

Heather: DJ, what the hell? Don't back up! Goddammit! I just got taken out!

Eva: They're not firing back, guys. Waste them!

Sadie: Help! I don't wanna lose!

Tyler: Score one for us!

Ezekiel: I got one t'oo, eh!

DJ: Aww, man. I'm out.

Beth: We got to get to A, Cody. The others got taken out.

Cody: I'm with you.

Eva: Run defense, guys. I'm gonna go plant the bomb.

Katie: Hey wait. Where's the party?

Gwen: Yeah, I expected more music, some dancing girls maybe.

Noah: Okay, we can stop teasing my girlfriend now.

Tyler: Here they come. Let's take them out, guys.

Lindsay: Wait, how do you fire again?

Beth: Got one!

Lindsay: Oh no!

Tyler: No one takes out my girl! Take this!

Beth: I'm out! Cody, it's up to you!

Cody: Gee, thanks.

Eva: The bomb's been planted.

Ezekiel: I think I'm 'oot.

Cody: Okay, just need to get three more players and then... Hey, wait a minute. I only see two.

Eva: Got him.

Cody: Aww, man.

* * *

**Round 2**

Tyler: We're heading to Bomb Site B, guys. Let's move out.

Eva: Justin, Lindsay. Take defensive positions. I'll be at this burnt out house.

Heather: Keep your eyes open, people. We don't want them sneaking up on us again.

Cody: Yeah, right.

Tyler: Alright, Zeke. Plant the bomb and I'll cover you.

Ezekiel: Um... is that p'oosible?

Tyler: No, no, I mean, I'll hold off the other team from attacking.

Ezekiel: Oo'kay. B'oom planted, eh.

Tyler: Cool. So now we just--

Heather: Crap! That didn't take him out!

Tyler: Let's get 'em, Zeke. Let's go, let's go, let's go!

Gwen: There goes DJ.

Trent: Did he even fire a shot?

Noah: Doubtful.

Katie: Oh no, Sadie's out!

Tyler: Zeke and I are taking fire at Bomb Site B, folks.

Eva: On my way. Hold them off.

Cody: I'm launching a grenade guys!

Heather: It didn't get him.

Beth: No, but he's dazed enough for us to take him out.

Tyler: Crap! I'm out.

Cody: I'm gonna disarm the bomb. Cover me.

Beth: I'm out.

Heather: What? How the hell did home school take you out?

Beth: He's just firing wildly.

Cody: I'm out, too.

Heather: You have got to be kidding me! Ugh! I have to do everything myself!

Ezekiel: G'ooys, I'm 'oot!

Heather: Right. I'll just defuse the bomb and--

Eva: Forgetting someone.

Heather: No!

Lindsay: We won again! Eeeee!

Heather: How the hell are we supposed to defuse the bomb when at least one is still alive?

* * *

**Round 3**

Cody: We really need to score some kills, guys. The game is lost, so we need to build up the secondary points.

Trent: If they can, perhaps Leftovers should let UMM plant that bomb so they could go for the defusal and objective point.

Gwen: What? Strategy? On this show? You're crazy.

Eva: Well, we got this game in the bag. Who wants to have some fun?

Ezekiel: What w'oos that Eva just thr'oo?

Lindsay: Hey, everything is all smoky.

Cody: What the?

Heather: I can't see a goddamned thing!

Gwen: Now this is going to be fun. A blind firefight.

Beth: Who's firing? Where are you guys?

Sadie: I can't see anything!

DJ: I think I'm dead, guys.

Katie: Who's winning? How many people are still standing?

Noah: Looks like we're about to find out.

Tyler: Dude, I think I got taken out by a teammate.

Eva: Wasn't me. I'm dead.

Cody: Okay. I think I'm the only one left on my team. Am I right?

Beth: Yep.

DJ: Yeah.

Sadie: Yes.

Heather: You better not screw this up, Cody!

Lindsay: I got someone!

Cody: Aww, man.

Heather: This cannot be the end! There's no f--/**censored**/--ing way Lindsay just won this round for her team!

Gwen: I love this game.

* * *

"Well, that was something special, folks," Chris announced. "Team UMM just stomped all over Team Leftovers and take the second game three rounds to none. Now it's time for Team Iron against Team Half-N-Half. Jessica, please explain the rules."

"Iron and Half-N-Half will be playing a different type of game in their match-up," Jessica said. "Obviously, they will be competing in another map called Dragon. However, they will also be competing under different objectives. Team Iron will be the terrorists, Team Half-N-Half the allies. Team Iron has hostages, so it is up to Half-N-Half to rescue them without getting taken out."

* * *

**Match 2**

**Iron vs. Half-N-Half**

**Game 2**

**Tactical Ops: Assault on Terror**

**Round 1**

Duncan: So what are we suppose to do again?

Harold: We're suppose to find the hostages and get them back to the spawn site.

Courtney: And what exactly is the spawn site?

LeShawna: The place we start the game from. C'mon, now. I wanna get this over with.

Izzy: Owen, you keep an eye on the hostages. Geoff, you go in that direction. Bridgette and Izzy will cut them off at the main route. This is gonna be so cool!

Bridgette: I take it Izzy has played this game as well.

Geoff: How about you, Owen bra? Have you played this game, too?

Owen: Nope. It's also my first time playing this one.

Harold: I spot someone. Split up!

Courtney: Split up? Why?

Harold: So we don't get mowed down at the same time. See! Bridgette just took me out!

Bridgette: Got him!

Duncan: Great. Now I'm lost.

LeShawna: You ain't the only one.

Bridgette: Rats! I almost had her.

Courtney: I got one! I got one!

LeShawna: Whoop-dee-doo! Now how about finding us so we can get them hostages.

Courtney: What the hell? I'm out? How's that possible? I didn't see who was firing at me!

Izzy: Izzy is very sneaky.

Duncan: Can someone tell me where the hell I am? I don't even know where I'm suppose to go. Ah, crap! It's crazy girl!

Izzy: Die, die, die! Kill, kill, kill!

Duncan: Goddammit. This bites.

Geoff: One more and we got the round, dudes!

Izzy: Wait for it... Wait for it... Surprise!

LeShawna: The hell? Don't tell me I'm all alone on this!

Izzy: Izzy wins!

LeShawna: Well, that sucked.

Gwen: I don't we're gonna be needed to commentate on this one.

Noah: Yeah. It's much more fun listening to Half-N-Half yell at each other every tenth of a second.

Katie: Popcorn, Noah-Bear?

Noah: Thank you, Katey-Kat.

Gwen: Noah-Bear?

* * *

**Round 2**

Duncan: How about we split off early as opposed to running into enemy fire?

LeShawna: Works for me.

Harold: I guess we can do that. I'll go this way then.

Courtney: I feel like I'm gonna regret this. I'm going with you, Harold.

Geoff: Keeping watch on the hostages, dude?

Owen: Okay.

Bridgette: Geoff was asking you a question, Owen. Not giving you a suggestion. Oh, hang on. I've just encountered someone.

Duncan: You gotta be kidding me! I got taken out by Malibu?

LeShawna: I'm out too. You think maybe she's played this game before?

Courtney: Just chase her off the plank, Harold. She can't attack from below.

Bridgette: Aw, man. I'm in the water now.

Harold: Lead the hostages out that window. I'll cover the rear.

Geoff: Uh, dudes. Is it me, or are the hostages escaping?

Bridgette: Owen, Izzy. Who's watching the hostages?

Izzy: Izzy not seeing any one coming through the main route. Izzy is vexed.

Owen: When I see a bunch of numbers, does that mean I'm out?

Courtney: I can't believe it. We're actually going to win this round!

Harold: Yes!

Trent: Hey, how about that? Half-N-Half won a round.

Noah: They just might have a chance after all.

* * *

**Round 3**

Harold: They're probably expecting us to split up, so let's stick together.

Duncan: I'm actually with agreement with Harold on this one.

Courtney: I dunno. I think we're better off splitting up.

LeShawna: If you do, you're on your own. The rest of us are going together.

Courtney: Fine. But we need to remain close even if we come under enemy fire.

Izzy: Geoff, follow Izzy. Izzy has plan.

Geoff: Uh, okay. I guess I'm following Izzy then.

Bridgette: Owen, why don't you and I attack from the main route. Does that sound good?

Owen: Okay.

Duncan: Here they come.

Courtney: Remember, stay close. Let's try to take them down together.

Izzy: Surprise!

LeShawna: Goddammit! I'm out!

Geoff: Attack from behind. Awesome strategy, Izzy!

Courtney: Oh no! I'm out!

Duncan: What? You gotta be kidding me! We walked right into an ambush!

Owen: Woo hoo! I got one!

Bridgette: Just one more, guys, and we got this game.

Harold: If I'm going down, I'm not going alone. Ha! I got one.

Owen: Aww. I'm out.

Izzy: No one takes my Owen out of a game!

Harold: Dang.

Gwen: Well, that was a lovely game.

Bridgette: Good job.

Geoff: Good job, guys! Way to go!

Harold: It's almost like we've been using pea-shooters. I couldn't tell if we were shooting air or paintballs. That was weak.

Duncan: I think I would've done more damage if I threw rocks.

* * *

"Now that's what I call excitement, boys and girls," Chris proclaimed. "Team Half-N-Half could manage to figure out how to work together in the end and possibly pull the upset victory in this one. But they still got some work to do as Team Iron has two games under their belts, much like Team UMM has over Team Leftovers. And so it falls to our final game to see if our underdogs have any hope of reversing their fortunes. Here is Jessica to explain _Star Wars: Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast_."

"Thank you, Chris," Jessica said. "_Jedi Knight II_ takes a lot of the similarities our contestants previously experienced in the last two games. Both matches will be under capture the flag rules with the round being awarded to the team with the most flags captured. Some of the differences include a faster pace gameplay, more weapons and abilities to fight the opposition with including the Force. But perhaps the biggest difference is scoring. In order for a flag capture to be recorded, teams must have their flags stationed in their bases in addition to bringing the opposition's flag home. So guarding the flag is now more vital than ever as it could be the key to gaining victory. Our first match will take place in the map called Warring Factions."

* * *

**Match 1**

**UMM vs. Leftovers**

**Game 3**

**Star Wars: Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast**

**Round 1**

Heather: We really need this one, people! So the minute you see someone from the other team, attack!

Beth: What about capturing the flag?

Heather: That is secondary. We need the kill points badly because we sucked horribly in the last two games.

Cody: But we do need to build up MVP points as well.

Heather: Look, just kill the first enemy you spot, okay? That should be simple enough!

Eva: I'll go capture the flag, you guys shut them down. Sound cool?

Tyler: Works for me.

Ezekiel: 'ookay.

Lindsay: Oh, look! I'm holding a glowing stick!

Gwen: Well, this ought to be all kinds of fun.

Noah: Who knows how many deaths we'll be seeing in this game.

Trent: Especially since the map is over one gigantic pit of death.

Sadie: Um... I think I'm just gonna, like, stay behind and, like, defend the flag.

Heather: God, she is such a pathetic weakling. Fine! Stay behind and defend the flag. We'll do the workload.

DJ: Maybe I should--

Heather: You're coming with us, DJ!

Eva: You mind hanging back, home school?

Ezekiel: W'ootever y'oo say, eh.

Eva: Alrighty. Let's go guys.

Tyler: Here they come.

Gwen: Wow. That's quite the cluster on display.

Katie: I, like, don't know who is who.

Noah: Going to be interesting to see who gets the most kills.

Katie: Hey look! Lindsay's going for the flag.

Sadie: Oh no. Oh no! Someone's coming! Shoo! Go away!

Lindsay: Aaaaahhhhh! Help me! I got the flag and I'm being chased!

Katie: Go, Sadie! Go!

Gwen: How about that. Sadie actually took someone out.

Noah: She was going up against Lindsay, but you're right. That's mighty impressive of her.

Katie: Aww, that's so nice of you Noah to, like, compliment her.

Trent: Was he really complimenting her?

Gwen: Probably not, but he's doing it so he won't be in hot water with Katie.

Trent: Smart man.

Noah: So long, DJ. Blown right off the map.

Gwen: What a bummer.

Trent: Alright, let's see how Sadie does with Tyler going after the flag.

Katie: Aaaaahhhhh! He blew her off the map too!

Gwen: Leftovers may want to reconsider their defensive choice in the next round.

Beth: I think their flag is unguarded. Maybe we can capture it.

Heather: Okay, I guess I can get the flag since it's right there. Now how do I jump higher. What the hell?

Gwen: It's a good thing Heather jumped a second time so she could plummet off the catwalk.

Tyler: Our flag still there, buddy?

Ezekiel: A-yup.

Tyler: Cool. I got their flag and heading back.

Noah: What a surprise. UMM takes the lead.

Katie: Come on, Sadie. Fight off them off. Oh no, she fell to a lower platform! She won't be able to catch up!

Eva: I got the flag guys. How's it going?

Tyler: Piece of cake.

Heather: Come on, Cody! We got him dead to rights, two against one. So why isn't he going down?

Cody: Because he's a better shot than the both of us. I'm out.

Heather: What? How the hell?

Gwen: Tyler taking out both Cody and Heather. Impressive.

Noah: And Eva scores again. What a shock.

Jessica: Time's up.

Heather: This sucks! You people are so pathetic!

* * *

**Round 2**

Cody: Maybe I should stay behind and help out Sadie defend.

Heather: Fine! Go do that!

Sadie: Eeeee! No one is, like, gonna pass us!

Eva: I got the flag guys.

Sadie: Oh no! Cody, stop her!

Cody: I'm trying! She's moving too fast! ... And now I'm falling off the catwalk.

Noah: "I regret nothing!"

Katie: Noah!

DJ: Guys, I got the flag!

Beth: Quick! Get out of there!

Eva: Put a stop to him, Zeke. I can't score if he has the flag.

Ezekiel: I'm 'oon 'im.

DJ: Help! I'm being fired at.

Noah: Nice away to avoid enemy fire, DJ. Jumping right into the abyss.

Gwen: Maybe they don't know they're supposed to stay on the catwalk.

Noah: Maybe there's some kind of big party going on down there that we haven't been invited to.

Trent: Speaking of party, Eva just scored.

Lindsay: Oh look! There's the enemy flag.

Eva: Just get it and go, blondy.

Lindsay: Aaaaahhhhh! I'm being chased!

Heather: You're not getting away that easy, stupid girl!

Cody: You might not wanna get too close, Heather.

Heather: Lindsay wouldn't know how to shoot a gun, let alone play--

Lindsay: Ohmygod! I got one!

Heather: Mother--/**censored**/!

Gwen: I love this game.

Tyler: Way to go, Linds!

Eva: We're running out of time. Just run for it and score that point for us.

Lindsay: Eeeee!

Beth: Someone stop her! She's gonna score!

Cody: I might not be able to catch her. But maybe I can snag their flag before she can score.

Noah: Well, this should be interesting.

Cody: Got it!

Lindsay: Hey! You stole my flag! Give it back!

Cody: What the? No way!

Trent: Lindsay actually used the Force push to knock him off the map. That's mighty impressive.

Gwen: I'm liking her more and more.

Tyler: Alright, babe!

Lindsay: I scored! I scored! Eeeee!

Jessica: Time's up.

* * *

**Round 3**

Trent: Looks like Zeke is comfortable in defense.

Gwen: Certainly doing a good job at that.

Noah: Though the job hardly requires effort given the team he's against.

Eva: Got the flag.

Cody: Aw, man. Right in front of me.

Katie: Wasn't that DJ who just fell?

Noah: He's probably had enough of this and is going to the party.

Heather: Don't you dare let Eva score! Knock her off the catwalk or something!

Cody: What does it look like I'm doing?

Gwen: He really likes swinging that lightsaber.

Noah: Like a little girl.

Trent: Well, at least he hasn't jumped into the abyss.

Gwen, Noah: Yet!

Beth: Go, Cody! You can do it!

Cody: Can't catch her. I'll just nab their flag.

Trent: Way to Force jump and not fall off.

Gwen, Noah: Yet!

Cody: I'm heading back. Just gotta stay on the cat--

Ezekiel: I g'oot 'oone, eh!

Gwen: Well, at least he didn't fall into the abyss.

Eva: Good going, home school Now touch our flag so I can score.

Tyler: Got two in my sight, guys. I'm taking them out.

DJ: Aw, man. I'm dead again.

Heather: Will someone defend themselves!

Cody: Oh great! Oh great! Um... Lemme try this one!

Tyler: Crap. Force pushed into the abyss.

Beth: Alright, Cody!

Gwen: Apparently, doesn't matter which team you're on to be in the party.

Noah: You think Cody will jump in after him?

Katie: Noah!

Eva: Got the flag again. No defense.

DJ: I spot Eva. I'm going after... Aw, man.

Heather: Don't tell me you walked right off the catwalk again!

Gwen: That must be one heck of a party.

Noah: You know what, I'm kinda itching to join them myself.

Eva: What a minute. Where's our flag?

Cody: This looks like a safe spot. I'll just stay here until--

Jessica: Time's up.

* * *

"Well, talk about blow outs, boys and girls," Chris chuckled. "That was the most one-sided game I've seen all night. UMM just absolutely smoked Leftovers, taking all three rounds in the third and final game. I wonder if they're gonna win the match-up. But first, we have one more game to play. It's Team Iron against Team Half-N-Half. Unlike Leftovers, Half-N-Half are actually making this a close match. So which map will they be competing on, Jessica?"

"Iron and Half-N-Half will compete on a map called Temple Tournament," Jessica replied.

* * *

**Match 2**

**Iron vs. Half-N-Half**

**Game 3**

**Star Wars: Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast**

**Round 1**

Noah: I have to say. Harold is looking surprisingly masculine in that... muumuu?

Katie: I think it's, like, some kind of a nightgown.

Trent: Maybe it's a housecoat.

Gwen: Well, it doesn't matter because Izzy smacked him down.

Izzy: Free for all! Free for all!

LeShawna: This girl is such a pain today.

Bridgette: I got the flag, guys.

Harold: I got their flag.

Duncan: Get back to the base and find a good spot to hide because they have ours.

LeShawna: Not for long.

Bridgette: Come on, come on. Owen, I might need some help.

LeShawna: Got her!

Bridgette: Rats.

Harold: I'm having trouble trying to get back.

Owen: Woo-hoo! I took someone out!

Harold: Dang.

Izzy: Izzy has enemy flag, over. Returning to--

Geoff: Whoa! Izzy just got taken out by Harold! Where did he come from? I thought Owen took him out.

Courtney: I think we just found our answer to Izzy, guys.

Duncan: I got the flag. Cover me.

Harold: Go, go, go!

Katie: Harold is, like, everywhere in this round. This is so, like, that Droopy cartoon where there is, like, a thousand Droopys. There's, like, a thousand Harolds.

Gwen: You know, it is a "Clone War."

Noah: Good point.

Trent: I wonder why Harold stopped following Courtney after passing through the neutral zone.

Gwen: Maybe he stopped to hem his dress.

Duncan: Oh yeah! I scored!

Owen: I got the flag!

Duncan: Oh no you don't! You're not taking victory away from us this time!

Owen: Aww. I'm dead.

Jessica: Time's up.

Courtney, Duncan, Harold, LeShawna: Yes!

Courtney: We can take this, guys!

Harold: We might actually win this match-up after all.

LeShawna: It's not over yet, y'all. Let's keep our heads in the game.

* * *

**Round 2**

Bridgette: I'm making my way into the enemy base.

LeShawna: Gonna camp over here. Never know if Izzy will pop about here.

Duncan: I'm making a run for the--

Izzy: Get him, Owen!

Owen: "I'm gonna take someone out!"

Duncan: I'm ambushed!

Izzy: Izzy eliminates opposition!

Harold: I got the flag.

Geoff: Not so fast, dude!

Harold: Gosh. I'm out.

Bridgette: I got the flag. I might need some cover.

Owen: I got your back.

Duncan: That's for ambushing me, fat boy.

Owen: I don't got your back.

Bridgette: It was enough, Owen. I'm back in our base.

Geoff: Way to go, babe! Score one for Team Iron, dudes!

Bridgette: Thank you, sweetie. But there's still time left in the round.

Noah: I swear to God, if that's Harold again, I'm gonna-- Oh no, it's Courtney.

Courtney: All I have to do is score and we'll have this game in the bag.

Bridgette: Guys, we gotta stop her.

Courtney: I got her! I got her!

Bridgette: Almost had her.

Trent: That was a nice defensive move to turn around there.

Noah: How is that defensive when she's running backwards.

Trent: She was running back to her base and she turns around to hold them off.

Courtney: Just need to get through the neutral zone and--

Bridgette: Got her!

Courtney: No!

Jessica: Time's up.

Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, Owen: Yeah!

Courtney: It's okay. We can still win this.

* * *

**Round 3**

Gwen: Kind of nice it's not a huge blow out for a change.

Noah: Yeah, it's kind of unusual. I'm not used to that.

Courtney: You will not take away our victory this time. There! I got you!

Owen: Aww. I'm dead.

Izzy: Izzy has captured enemy flag, over.

LeShawna: Oh no, you're not gettin' away from me this time, crazy girl.

Courtney: I'm almost at the flag--

Geoff: Not on my watch.

Courtney: Crap!

Izzy: Izzy Force run, engage!

LeShawna: No, no, no. I'm losin' her!

Izzy: Izzy scores!

Harold: I got the flag!

Katie: What?

Trent: Harold was nowhere near that flag.

Noah: He must've been using some kind of super running powers.

Gwen: If he can get this back, they're gonna tie up this score on flag captures.

Duncan: Go!

Harold: I'm going!

Duncan: Go!

Harold: I'm going! Gosh! Just cover my back!

Duncan: You heard him, girls.

Harold: Hurry up! I just run into half of the other team in the neutral zone.

Courtney: No, no, no!

LeShawna: Hold them off, baby! We're almost there!

Harold: I'm trying! There's too many of them!

Duncan: Come on, you stupid door! Open!

Geoff: Got him!

Harold: Aaaaahhhhh!

Jessica: Time's up.

Courtney, Duncan, Harold, LeShawna: NOOOOO!

Courtney: We had it! We were so close!

Duncan: This bites.

* * *

"An amazing finish, boys and girls!" Chris proclaimed. "We could not have put together a better main event! Team Half-N-Half were oh so close, but in the end Team Iron won the third and final game. And like UMM over Leftovers, they have secured all three game points and are therefore the winners of their match."

Moments later, the eighteen students were carried back onto the stage. Upon being dropped to the ground, they saw the entire audience applaud and cheer them. Izzy jumped up and perched proudly on Owen's shoulders as her male fans began chanting her name out of sync.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with an Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace)**

Bridgette - "That was so much fun! I'm not really a gamer and all, but just being able to go out there and let loose was great. Okay, so maybe I'm feeling upbeat because I was on a surefire winning team that included Geoff and Izzy. But enjoying myself, and that's what counts, right?"

Heather - "That was completely horrible! I have never been so humiliated as to be associated with a bunch of pathetic losers! It's like neither DJ nor Sadie could do something so simple as walk! It was embarrassing!"

Lindsay - "That was, like, so cool! I got to run around and do things and stuff. And my team beat Heather's! This is, like, one of the best days of my life! Eeeee!"

LeShawna - "I gotta say, I did have a bit of a good time. But that counts nothin' because we were so close to gettin' the win in that third game. And the worst part of this is that I can't fault the uptight CIT and her punk boyfriend."

* * *

"It seems pretty useless at this point, but we might as well go through with the formalities of the challenge," Chris announced. "In our first match, Team UMM took on Team Leftovers. UMM won the first game three to zero, then the second game three to zero, and then turned the whole world upside-down by winning the third game three to zero. That's three of the five possible challenge points they've won. Oh, but you're not gonna believe this. UMM also won the total accumulated kills point 39 to 11. Ouch. Can UMM make it a shout out? Is the sun going to rise tomorrow? Here's Jessica to explain our final challenge point."

"To determine the MVP of each match, we total up all of our players' kill-to-death ratios," Jessica explained. "Then we add in any objectives they have secured like capturing a flag, planting a bomb, or rescuing hostages. We then feed all of this information into a giant, industrial blender then pour the results out on a couple cookie sheets. We bake them at 425 degrees for 15 minutes and then we take a look at the cookie sheets and see if we have our MVP for each match. Chef, who is the MVP in our first match?"

Chef held in his hands a cookie sheet that was on fire. He took one look at it before blowing it out. He then flipped it to one side for all to reveal the name of the contestant.

"Surprise, surprise, the MVP of the first match is Eva," Chris announced. Eva pumped her fist while some of the audience cheered her on. "Now for our second match, Team Iron and Team Half-N-Half. Iron won the first game two to one, then they won the second game two to one, and finally managed to win the third round two to one. So Iron has already secured their match by winning three of the five possible challenge points. And the hits just keep on coming as they scored the most total accumulated kills 19 to 14. Oh so close yet again, Half-N-Half. So Chef, who is the MVP in our second match?"

Chef pulled out the second cookie sheet. Like the most previous sheet, it was on fire. Unlike the most previous sheet, it required him to blow it out with two puffs. He then used a towel to wipe the surface before flipping it over to reveal the MVP.

"What a shock, it's Izzy," Chris announced. Izzy cackled in victory as her male fans once more began chanting her name out of sync while she blew kisses at them. "But we want an ultimate winner in this one, folks. So, our lovely audience, cast your vote using the devices placed under your seats and pick who the overall winner of tonight's challenge is. Eva or Izzy?"

As the audience began to vote, Duncan and Courtney nervously glanced over at Izzy. Izzy was rubbing her hands and had a huge smirk on her face. Duncan and Courtney then looked back at one another and shuttered. Hoping that there is no repeat of what happened after the last time Izzy won a challenge. Jessica then walked over to Chris, handing him a sheet of paper.

"And the results are in," Chris announced. "It was a pretty close one. But in the end, two-thirds of our audience selected the overall winner of this challenge to be... Eva!"

As the audience cheered, Eva pumped her fist in victory. Her teammates giving her congratulatory pats on the back while the school wrestling team chanted her name in unison. Izzy looked a little dejected, but then shrugged before immediately jamming her face into Owen's. Duncan and Courtney began to gag in response.

"As this week's winner, Eva will get the following prizes," Chris continued. "Copies of all three games played today as well as a Playstation 3 and a copy of the massive multiplayer shooter _MAG_. She will also have an advantage in next week's challenge."

One of the men in suits handed the pile of prizes to Eva. She took one look at the prizes in her hands before turning and dumping them onto Ezekiel. The prairie boy barely managed to keep his balance at suddenly being given the stack of games.

"I don't play video games," Eva stated. "Maybe home school will have better use for them." This caused a number of the male contestants to moan in disappointment.

"She just gave it away," Cody said. "Not even giving a second thought to what she had."

"A Playstation 3," Harold noted. "I've always wanted one."

"Dude!" Geoff cried. "If only I would've been standing there, bra. I could've gotten all that."

"Looks like there's still plenty of excitement even after the challenge is finished," Chris chuckled. "But of course, when there is a winner, there must certainly be a looo-ser. Using the same calculations to determine the MVP for each match, we put the numbers together to come up with the weakest player of the entire challenge." Jessica walked over and handed him a photograph which he proudly showed to the audience. "And the looo-ser is none other than DJ!"

"Aw, man," DJ sighed, hanging his head in defeat.

"Dude, seriously," Chris said. "You totally sucked out there. Justin was just as bad, but he was on a winning team. Sadie managed to score a kill while you literally just jumped to your death at every given moment. So you will be going into next week's challenge with a disadvantage, which will indeed be making its return."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Eva - "Why would I need video games? If I wanna beat someone up, I'll do it in real life. I don't need polygons to do that for me."

Geoff - "Dude, that would've been so sweet if I was right there to get those games, man. There's a lotta us that want a Playstation 3 and now Zeke has it. Lucky little dude right there, bra."

Ezekiel - /_Still holding the prizes given to him by Eva._/ "I never played vide'oo games bef'oore, eh. Maybe it c'ood be l'oots 'oof f'oon."

Harold - "LeShawna and I managed to work together with Courtney and Duncan by the last game. And we were all actually getting along for a change. Maybe this will help us bury the hatchet."

Courtney - "I must admit, it was nice working with Harold for a change. He's still an opponent in the election and this Sunday I will come out the better candidate in the debate. But outside of that..."

Duncan - "I'm hoping that her not being made the overall winner will dissuade Izzy from..." /_Pauses to shutter._/ "... From blowing up Owen's room again."

Izzy - "You probably know me already, but my name is Glovis Sandoval. Don't be intimidated by the fact that I'm the world's foremost toothbrush historian. I can assure you that I put my pants on one leg at a time, just like everyone else. Actually, between you and me, I put my pants on two legs at a time. What I do is, I sit on the bed with my feet in the air and I pull the pants down on both legs simultaneously. If I'm going to finish my masterwork, 'Molars of Destiny: A Complete History of Oral Hygiene,' I can't spare the time to do it the normal way." /_Leans back to put her feet in the air, causing her to fall to the ground. She makes struggling grunts as she tries to put on a pair of jeans. She sits back up, the pair of jeans being worn on her head._/ "We can't let pants cheat future generations, can we?"

* * *

**Team UMM** - Eva, Ezekiel, Justin, Lindsay, Tyler

**Team Leftovers** - Beth, Cody, DJ, Heather, Sadie

**Team Iron** - Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, Owen

**Team Half-N-Half** - Courtney, Duncan, Harold, LeShawna

**Not Competing** - Gwen, Katie, Noah, Trent

**Winning Teams** - UMM, Iron

**MVPs** - Eva, Izzy

**Overall Winner** - Eva

**Looo-ser** - DJ

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer over Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner

* * *

Sorry for the delay guys. I've been real busy lately as I've been taking care of my grandfather on my dad's side of the family. I don't want to go into details since it's extremely personal, but I'm pretty much the go-to guy for the time being since he's not very comfortable with strangers and would rather have family members watching over him. Don't feel too bad because it's really not that bad. We got to watch a great western series called _Deadwood_ and I've gotten him started on _Battlestar Galactica_. Plus whenever we go to the movies I get in free so I'm not complaining. Now then, on to other business. Thanks for the great suggestions for how to decorate the Confession Cam. Don't stop, keep giving me more. Plus it's inspirational, as **Kobold Necromancer** started using the decorations idea for his story _TDC 2: Total Drama Battlegrounds_. Your cookie is on the way, bra. I haven't forgotten about it. As for Izzy's recent babbles, they're all thanks to a great writer in Matthew Sturges. He co-writes _Jack of Fables_ with Bill Willingham and also writes _JSA All-Stars_ and _House of Mystery_ as well as some non-comic book novels like _The Office of Shadow_ and _Midwinter_. Check out his work, you'll love it. And don't forget to send in those reviews!

---

**Next Up:** The Debates


	18. Week 6, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Eighteen

---

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Last time on Total Drama Academy...

The past week was pretty much devoted to one thing. Courtney and Duncan against Harold and LeShawna. With elections now just around the corner, the hate going down between these four intensified. Whether it is Courtney accusing Harold of cheating or LeShawna wanting to strangle Duncan for allegedly getting her to sit on a whoopee cushion filled with chocolate pudding, these kids are ready to explode at a moment's notice and take everything in a twenty mile radius with them. So awesome!

It apparently reached its peak with the other students, however. Bridgette can't sleep in fear of the nightmares she would have hearing Courtney talk in her sleep about what she wants to do to Harold. Being used as a rag doll by Eva and the school wrestling team hasn't quite slowed Duncan down. It's gotten to the point where Gwen enlisted Izzy to bring all the drama to a halt before it really gets out of hand. But you can bet that Heather will keep fanning the flames on behalf of the Dodekatheon.

Challenge Night saw our contestants play classic PC games while Gwen, Trent, Noah, and Katie sat back and commentated on all the action. And boy did we get some wicked lines coming out of Gwen and Noah. Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna were forced into teaming together and managed to some how find the will to put aside their differences in an attempt to defeat Bridgette, Geoff, Izzy, and Owen. In the end, Eva was an unstoppable juggernaut, almost single-handedly winning the challenge for her team and claiming the overall victory for herself. DJ, on the hand, was named the big ol' looo-ser for sucking beyond belief. Might wanna grow a spine, dude.

This week will certainly test some of our kiddies to the limit, what with the elections and my plans for Challenge Night.

How will the elections go?

Will Courtney and Harold come to blows during a debate?

Will Heather succeed sabotaging Courtney's chances?

Will Cody's fangirls finally get their frightening little hands on the poor lil' guy?

Has Izzy finally gone over the deep end with her bizarre rambling?

Find out in this special edition of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Week 6, Day 1 - Saturday)**

"Whew," Duncan sighed, wiping sweat from his forehead. "Took me all night, but it'll be so worth it." He turned away from the wall to face his roommate. "Yo, pip-squeak. Lemme show you how we're gonna use your new game console here."

Ezekiel swallowed before slowly hopping off his bed and shuffling slowly toward the punk. Before he knew it, he found himself getting pulled right up to the wall. It didn't help calm his nerves that Duncan had a rather sinister looking grin on his face.

"Zeke my man, have a good look at this," Duncan announced, throwing his arm out at the wall before them.

Ezekiel raised a curious brow as he looked. He was afraid to speak at first. "Um..." he managed to utter. "H'oo am I g'oona play games on a giant tel'o'visi'n y'oo painted?"

Surprisingly, Duncan didn't sound offended. "Because there's more to this than just a painting of a giant tel'o'visi'n," he replied. "If you notice, there's a big red button that's sticking out of the wall. Go ahead and press it like you're turning the sucker on."

Ezekiel swallowed before nervously sticking his finger out and pushing the button. Once the button was pressed, the wall immediately began to move. This in turn caused Ezekiel to squeak and hop back in fright. The entire section of the wall with the painted television began to flip around. The other side revealed a real giant screen television before them.

"And presto!" Duncan laughed. "We got ourselves a TV just right for your PS3."

Ezekiel looked at the television in awe for a moment. Then he realized something as he raised a curious brow. "Wait a min'oot, eh," he said sheepishly. "Isn't this 'ooen's?"

"Yep," Duncan replied rather proudly. "But he won't know the difference between his TV and a painting of one. Trust me, little guy, you'll be rocking your games while he is being mesmerized by a still image of the _Teletubbies_."

"Um... 'ookay..." Ezekiel said, scratching his head. "B'oot w'oodn't we get in tr'ooble f'oor stealin'?"

"Whoever said we were stealing Owen's TV?" Duncan retorted. "We're 'borrowing' it. All we have to do to return it is press the red button right there below the TV if you wanna return it. Go ahead and push it."

Ezekiel did as he was told and pushed the red button. The wall flipped again, bringing back the section of the wall that was a painted television set. It was at this point that he realized there was something painted on the actual screen portion, but still did not know what the _Teletubbies_ were.

"See?" Duncan said. "So whenever you're done playing your games or need to giving it back for some reason, just push the button under the TV. Owen won't notice a thing and we can't be accused of stealing his TV since we're not really taking it. Got it?"

"Um... I think s'oo, eh..." Ezekiel said with a shrug.

"Good," Duncan said. "Now go fetch your PS3 so I can hook it up to the TV. I'll push the button so we can get started."

Duncan pressed the big red button on the painted television, resulting in the section of the wall flipping. Only Owen's television was not the only thing that suddenly appeared before them. Ezekiel squeaked and pulled his toque as far down over his eyes as he could while Duncan flinched in horror.

"Hello, boy-yos!" cried the all too familiar cackle of one Izzy.

"What the hell?" Duncan yelled. "Look, I'm not making plans to ambush Harold and/or LeShawna, okay? So don't even think about pulling out your bazooka of a super soaker and..." His voiced trailed off when he noticed something. Something that started to get the wheels in his brain going. Forming a particular thought. One that scared him.

Izzy had come from Owen's room. Her hair was extremely frizzy. There were torn marks about her clothes. She had black, charred marks on her skin. Smoke was coming off her body.

"Oh dear God..." Duncan uttered in quiet horror. "Tell me you and Owen just didn't do what I think you did."

"Owen couldn't sleep last night," Izzy began to explain rather happily. "He said there was some noise going on, but couldn't figure out where it was coming from. And he didn't want to watch TV because he thought it would wake you guys and you, Duncan, would get real mad and beat him up. So he came over to my room and asked me about what he could do and an idea came into my head that would make him not feel sad about not being able to sleep. And it was good too because we didn't bother any one since the noise that was keeping Owen awake was louder than the noise we were making, only it wasn't as cool as ours."

That was more than Duncan could take. He slapped a hand over his mouth to prevent any vomit from escaping as he immediately ran over to the door. He opened it mere seconds before someone on the other side was about to knock on it.

"Huh," Noah said with a curious brow raised. "It's eleven-thirty in the morning and you're moving about. Is the bed on fire?"

"Move!" Duncan managed to yelled in a muffled tone, pushing the egghead aside as he ran at top speed out of the room. He smashed through the door into the bathroom and was soon heard regurgitating.

Noah looked in the direction he watched Duncan disappear to. Then turned his attention to the room. One look at Izzy was all he needed to have an idea of what was going on. "M'yeah..." he said. "I'm just going to go over there and wait for Duncan to pick himself back up. I'm sure Courtney will understand why he was being late in helping her prepare for tomorrow. Nice knowing you, Zeke." He slowly turned and walked away from view.

Ezekiel shuttered as she slowly began to lift his toque up from over his eyes. He then looked over to see Izzy literally hovering over him. The sight caused him to trip and fall back down to the ground.

"Izzy feels Zeke needs girlfriend!" Izzy suddenly proclaimed. A statement that immediately caused Ezekiel to blush from head to toe. "So much cuteness beneath that toque, Izzy cannot believe Zeke does not have a girl smothering Zeke with love!"

"B'oot-B'oot-B'oot-B'oot..." Ezekiel stammered in a poor attempt to protest.

"Izzy already knows what Zeke is going to say," Izzy said as she scooped up the prairie boy into her arms. "Zeke is going to say, 'B'oot I d'oon kn'oo h'oow t'oo get a girlfriend, eh.' Never fear! Auntie Izzy is here to help Zeke how to score with girls!"

The blush that covered Ezekiel's entire body deepened upon hearing the last statement. "Help!" he whimpered with a squeak.

"We're gonna start by hooking up that PS3 of yours into Owen's TV, uh-huh," Izzy said, swinging Ezekiel about in her arms. "That's because we're gonna watch some movies that will help understand girls. And what better way to learn about girls than to watch them in movies on Blu Ray!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Dear God, please tell me I didn't peek on Izzy and Owen. It's bad enough just thinking about it. To have witnessed it?" /_Gags and is about to throw up._/ "Gotta hold it together. Gotta hold it together." /_Clinches his eyes shut._/ "Okay, Duncan. Think. Think! Get your mind off of those two. Think, goddammit! Ah, I got it! Princess in her pajamas." /_Starts to relax, leans back in the chair with his hands behind his head, and keeps his eyes closed._/ "Yeah... That's it... Pink top and bottom... Essentially just a matching pair of underwear... Silky soft underwear... Very sexy pair of underwear... Even sexier when she's not wearing them... Casually discarded on the floor... Or hanging at the edge of the bed..." /_Lets out a sigh of relief. Then he opens one eye, realizing that he is being taped._/ "... And she's gonna kill me when she sees this."

Chris - /_Is looking miffed._/ "Again! Sooo lucky the cameras were off. Seriously! Izzy and Owen just don't realize the horror they would unleash if even a frame ever got out. I'm telling you, people's eyes would melt right off of their skulls. And that's the kind of publicity I cannot afford!"

* * *

"Oh my gosh," Bridgette yawned, stretching her arms out in both directions. "Finally, some sleep. Thank you so much again, Gwen, for letting me spend the night in your room." She sat up from the mattress she had been sleeping on and started to hand brush her hair while keeping her legs snuggled under her blankets.

"Ah, it was nothing," Gwen said, waving her hand slightly as she sat up in her bed before licking the palm to be used for straightening out her hair. "I'm not gonna let a good friend and you suffer another second just because your roomie edges on the verge of a complete psychotic breakdown."

Bridgette sighed. "I just wish they put a stop to this already," she said. "It's getting way too out of hand now. I really hope that things will cool down after the elections."

"Until then, you can always call on Izzy," Gwen noted. "Regardless of where you are and where she might be, just call her name and she'll put a stop to any of the outbursts those four might have."

"There is that," Bridgette agreed with a nod.

"But let's not talk about insanity for the moment," Gwen quickly stated. "I think it's time we actually got started in thinking about how we're gonna decorate that living space."

"Oh yeah, I forgot all about that," Bridgette said. "So it's you, me, Courtney, Duncan, and Zeke, right? With you spear-heading."

"Yep," Gwen responded with a nod. "And we can go crazy however we want because the producers are flipping the bill."

"You just really want to spend their money until they're bankrupt, don't you," Bridgette noted with a curious brow.

"Damn skippy," Gwen laughed. "Between the torture they put us through on the island to the crap we had to take from Chris, I find that it's only fair that we pay them back in spades."

"Don't you think we've done enough damage making them buy my dress last week?" Bridgette asked.

"Come on, don't back out now," Gwen said with a grin. "Last week was me exploiting a loophole in the contract they so lovingly flaunt in our faces. This time, I'm exploiting Chris' own words. He specifically said that the producers would sponge for whatever was needed to decorate the living space. So I wanna really stick it to him by going on a spending spree."

Bridgette gave Gwen's words some thought. "Well..." she started to utter. "I guess we could fix that place up for our benefit. It would definitely be nice to have things in the living space that would help us relax. What with the combination of classes, the challenges on Friday, and all the drama that goes on in between."

"And what's the one thing in all of the world that would help you relax?" Gwen asked.

Bridgette sighed and smiled. "Surfing," she said breathlessly.

"So what would really make that living space very soothing for you?" Gwen asked further.

"A wave machine?" Bridgette said almost with a bit of hesitation.

"Bingo," Gwen stated.

"You really want to put a wave machine in the living space?" Bridgette questioned. "Would there be enough room?"

"Bridge, we can all see it in your eyes," Gwen began to explain. "You haven't surfed since we got here. And aside from making out with Geoff, you live for catching waves. Sure it's not a beach. But you'll get to surf. It's one of those rare chances you're gonna get while we're here and they've practically put it on a silver platter by having me oversee the decorations and waste however much of their money to do so."

Bridgette thought some more about what Gwen had said. Whether she would admit it to others or not, she did love spending time in water more so than on land. And she certainly wanted to feel the rush of surfing. Something she was definitely not getting in any shape or form at the school. A wave machine was just a simulator and not the real deal, that much she knew. But she knew of some damn good simulators. And, as Gwen said, there was no limit to how much money could be spent.

"Okay, you talked me into it," Bridgette said in an excited tone. "Let's get a wave machine for the living space!"

"That's the spirit!" Gwen proclaimed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - /_Squealing with excitement as she gently places a Japanese peace lily in one corner of the room._/ "A wave machine! We're actually going to put a wave machine in the living space! I get to surf whenever I have free time! Weekday afternoons, weekends! I can even surf at night! This is going to be great!"

Gwen - /_Admiring the Japanese peace lily._/ "If any one deserved to have whatever they wanted installed in the living space, it's Bridgette. All the suffering she had to go through being Courtney's roommate during the latter's psychotic period warrants getting Bridge something that will let her surf."

Chris - /_Still looks miffed, holds a tape recorder._/ "Note to self. Never allow Gwen to win a challenge ever again!"

Ezekiel - "Izzy said the m'oovies she had w'ood help me 'oonderstand girls, eh. She sh'oo'ed me _Attack 'oof the 50 F'oot W'ooman_, _Kill Bill_, _King K'oong_, and _S'oond of M'oosic_. B'oot I'm conf'oosed. Is she tryin' t'oo say that all girls are like her? Bec'oose she was in all 'oof th'oose m'oovies, eh."

Izzy - /_Sings with music mysteriously playing in the background, wearing a yellow track-suit._/ "I am sixteen going on seventeen, Innocent as a rose, Bachelor dandies, drinkers of brandies, What do I know of those." /_Giggles._/

* * *

**(Week 6, Day 2 - Sunday)**

"I am not letting any one in!" Courtney yelled through the door. "Do you both understand me? This door is not going to open!"

"Aw, come on, Princess," Duncan complained. "Don't tell me you're this much of a nervous wreck hours before you have to do some kinda debate. Maybe you just need a little massage to ease all the tension."

"I don't need a massage!" Courtney immediately screamed. "I don't need my boyfriend right now! I don't need my campaign manager! I don't need any one else in the room!"

"Someone miss their period this morning?" Noah muttered quietly.

"I heard that!" Courtney shrieked.

"Look, if you're not gonna let us in, you might as well tell us what the deal is," Duncan attempted to reason. "The debate is in a few hours and you're preventing the two people who are trying to help you get elected from putting together some kind of strategy. There something the matter that we should know about?"

There was a bit of a pause before any sort of response was made. "You wanna know what the deal is?" Courtney cried. "Well, here it is! I! Have! No! Clothes!"

Duncan and Noah exchanged confused glances and raised brows.

"What do you mean you have no clothes?" Noah asked for clarification.

"That's exactly what I mean!" Courtney yelled. "I have no clothes! I woke up this morning to find all of my clothes horribly vandalized! Every single one of them! My school uniform, all of my shirts and pants! The only ones that were untouched are the pajamas that I'm still wearing! There is no way in hell I'm wearing them for the debate!"

"Would be sexy though," Duncan muttered with a smirk to Noah.

"Pig!" Courtney shrieked.

"Obviously there's no point in saying that we should try to stay calm since you're well past the point of no return," Noah noted. "But we should at least focus. When you say your clothes were vandalized, what exactly do you mean?"

"They're covered in filth!" Courtney screamed. "And when I say filth, I mean filth! The kind of filth that swims around in the sewers! My clothes are completely soaked in them! It's going to take all f--/**censored**/--ing day and all night to clean and sanitize a set that I can wear!"

"Sounds like something I would do," Duncan mused aloud.

"You're not helping!" Courtney cried.

"Are you sure all of your clothes have been vandalized?" Noah asked.

"What part of 'I have no clothes' do you not understand?" Courtney yelled.

"You don't have a back up set or something?" Noah questioned further.

There was a long pause. Longer than previously. Duncan and Noah glanced at one another with wonder before any sort of reply was made. A rather quiet one.

"I do have one..." Courtney muttered rather sheepishly.

"Say again," Duncan said. "Your voice is muffled from behind the door."

"I have a back up set, goddammit!" Courtney screamed.

"Then everything should be peachy keen, don't you think?" Noah noted. There was no immediate reply. "Unless there's some kind of problem with this back up set of yours."

"They're not my clothes," Courtney said in a volume high enough for them to hear from behind the door. "My mom packed me one of her business suits in case of emergencies."

"Don't you think the rest of your clothes being covered in filth constitutes as an emergency?" Duncan pointed out.

"I really don't want to wear them," Courtney responded. There seemed to be a whimper in the tone of her voice. "It's her favorite suit and I don't wanna think about the possibility of messing them up."

"She wouldn't have packed them for you if she didn't think they would help you should a situation like the one you're facing now befall upon you," Noah reasoned. "And you're only going to wear them for the debates. Once that's finished, you can beeline straight back here and shut yourself out from the rest of the world until we can get a clean set of your clothes washed."

"Sounds like a plan to me," Duncan said. "What do you say, Princess?"

There was a long pause. Much longer than the last. Then came what sounded like a sigh. "Okay, fine," Courtney said. "But Duncan needs to be with the others until after the debate."

"What for?" Duncan asked.

"Because you're a monster and I can't focus when you're trying to shove your hand down my pants with only hours before I'm supposed to be ready for the debate," Courtney replied.

"She does make a good point," Noah noted.

"Fine," Duncan grumbled. "Where is the debate gonna be tonight?"

"You're not gonna like it," Noah answered.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Japanese peace lily)**

Noah - "Being the youngest of nine, I've had my share of cleaning clothes covered in filth whether I wanted to or not. But this was a whole new level of vandalism. Courtney wasn't kidding when she said that her clothes were completely soaked. I had no choice but to call in some help."

Sadie - /_Squirming._/ "Ohmygosh, that was, like, sooo disgusting!"  
Katie - /_Also squirming._/ "I know, right?"  
Sadie - "I can't believe, like, Noah would ask us to help him clean those clothes."  
Katie - "I know. But at least, like, he was willing to clean with us."  
Sadie - "That's sooo true. Guys would just make girls do all the cleaning."  
Katie - "But not my Noah. He's, like, such a gentleman." /_Swoons._/  
Sadie - "Who would, like, do such a horrible thing to clothes though?"  
Katie - "I know, right? Courtney and I, like, don't see eye to eye. But even I sooo wouldn't do that to her."  
Sadie - "Why don't you, like, see eye to eye with Courtney?"  
Katie - "Because! She's, like, sooo mean. Almost as mean as Heather."  
Sadie - "Ohmygosh, Heather is, like, really mean."  
Katie - "I know, right? She was, like, all mean and stuff when she passed by my room last night with a bucket or something."  
Sadie - "Did you, like, know what was in that bucket?"  
Katie - "No. But it was, like, sooo bad smelling."

Heather - /_Acts innocent sarcastically._/ "What? Was I somehow responsible for drenching virtually every article of clothing Courtney had in disgusting filth? Why should I be a suspect? There's no proof, no evidence that I had anything to do with that."

* * *

"Welcome to the Richmore Academy Vice Presidential Debate!" announced Chris to thunderous applauds and cheers.

"You have got to be kidding me," Eva groaned, crossing her arms.

"How did he get to be the moderator of the debates?" Cody asked aloud curiously.

"Part of the deal the school made with the producers," Jessica replied. "If it will add to the exposure the school wants, Chris will host whatever major social event takes place that involves you guys. Since Courtney and Harold are running for Vice President, he'll be serving as moderator for the debates."

"Bad enough we have to see his stupid face every Friday," Duncan grumbled. "Now we gotta see him on occasions like this."

"I'm Chris McClean, and I'll be your handsome moderator for this evening's festivities," Chris continued. "In two days, you juniors will be casting your votes to elect which of our four remaining candidates is most suited for the position of student Vice President as well as selecting two others to serve on the student council. Tonight, here in The Marshmallow, those same four candidates will be on their knees pleading and begging for your votes. So let's get this party started!"

The audience started to cheer again. It was quickly turned to screams and groans when Chef appeared to set up the four podiums. This was because he was wearing a sparkling pink dress. Many male audience members proceeded to vomit. Among them were Ezekiel, Tyler, and Cody. Chef merely growled at the audience before heading back behind the nearest stage curtain.

"Just another reason why I don't like sparkles," Gwen noted, shaking her head in disgust.

"Introducing first..." Chris began to say, then pausing for effect. "Harold!"

Harold came out to rousing cheers and applauds. The loudest being LeShawna, who was whistling at such a high volume it was unmistakable. He smiled and waved before taking his spot behind one of the podiums.

"Next up..." Chris continued, again pausing for effect. "Chelsea!"

The audience kept on cheering and applauding. A girl with short brown hair and glasses appeared, walking to one of the podiums with a purpose. Heather clapped silently, as though showing any enthusiasm would make any one suspicious of her role.

"Presenting..." Chris resumed, once again pausing for effect. "Courtney!"

As the cheering and applauding began, Courtney peeked sheepishly out from behind the curtain. After taking a deep breath, she slowly stepped out. Wearing her mother's business suit. A very professional looking business suit. One that also accentuated her body shape in a complimentary, and rather flattering, manner. This resulted in a series of whistling and cat-calls from the males in the audience. None was obviously more excited than Duncan, who was whistling louder than everyone else in the building. Courtney blushed as she quickly took her spot behind an open podium.

"Not too shabby, Courtney," Chris said in admiration before returning his attention to the audience. "And last, but certainly not least..." Once more, he paused for effect. "Janet!"

The Marshmallow exploded beyond comprehension as the audience were cheering and applauding louder than ever. The Riker Hall students looked over as many heads and shoulders as they could to get their first look at the girl that was supposedly a Goddess amongst the students in school.

And they were flabbergasted.

Janet had light blue hair. Bangs were covering her left eye and a bushy ponytail hanging over her right shoulder. The hair color clashed badly with her green eyes and red lips. As did the orange jumpsuit jacket she was wearing, zipped up just enough to cover any cleavage she might expose. Which wouldn't have been a problem in the first place as she was quite flat chested. The jacket barely covered her belly. Though flat, it wasn't quite toned. She wore waist-hugging jeans, a pair where its tan color was badly faded. On her feet were the dirtiest pair of untied sneakers a girl could possibly wear. Hanging from her right wrist was a loose pink wristband and around her neck was a fake silver medallion. Fingernails painted in yellow.

She looked absolutely nothing like what a popular girl might, could, or should look. Yet the other students had fallen head over heels for her. She gave a shy smile and waved as she made her way to the remaining podium, further driving the audience wild. It was then that it dawned on the Riker Hall students. There was some kind of aura to her that was nothing short of alluring. Her presence just drew them in.

"Ah, you guys," Janet said as she blushed. She spoke in a very soft, mousy voice, which was barely audible given how noisy the audience was being. Their continued cheering only caused her to giggle bashfully some more.

"So here's how we're gonna do this, folks," Chris announced after the crowd had finally died down. "We will start with each candidate answering one of four questions supplied to me by school officials. After which, we will have a pair of round robin debates. An opportunity for the candidates to tear into each other's character. And we wrap it all up nicely with final statements. So why don't we begin with our first question." Chris randomly pulled out a card from a stack that sat next to the microphone. "Our school officials ask, what motivated you to run for Vice President in the first place? Let's start with... Janet!"

The Marshmallow once again exploded in cheers, causing Janet to blush a deeper shade of pink. She waited patiently until the audience quieted down before speaking. "Okay, what motivated me..." she said, repeating portions of the question asked to her. "Well, my friend Cathy said that it would be fun if I ran. I wasn't sure, but she and Pam started get all excited about it. Soon enough, Quinn and Velma also wanted to see me run. So I guess you can say they talked me into it."

The audience resumed their cheering. Courtney looked rather dumbfounded at hearing the answer for why one of her rival candidates ran. Most of the other Riker Hall students were just as stupefied. The males seemed to not mind though.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "I really don't see what the big deal is about this Janet chick. Did you see the color of her hair? It's blue. Blue, people!" /_Pauses for a moment and then looks as though he realizes something._/ "Wait. Okay, now I get why she's the greatest thing to happen in our lives since sliced bread."

LeShawna - "This is tha girl everyone's all head over heels over?" /_Pauses, as though she is waiting for a response._/ "Boy, she really got us all hook, line, and sinker."

Gwen - "A social basket case who can make men weak in the knees in-spite of arguably the most God awful fashion sense this side of Björk? I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

Owen - "Did you see that Janet girl? She was so pretty and cute. Like a little puppy! I like puppies. So I like Janet because she's like a puppy and I like puppies."

Trent - "Whoever said that Janet was like a female Justin, they weren't kidding. All the guys in the building were just... mesmerized by her the second she walked in. Clashing appearance and all. But I don't think any guy was more absorbed in looking at her than Justin himself. Imagine that."

Justin - "And there she was. An angel descended from the Heavens. The most beautiful creature on Earth. Yes. More beautiful than yours truly." /_Sticks a picture of Janet over the "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer and sighs longingly._/ "I just may have found the one. Oh yes. She will be mine."

DJ - /_Admires the picture of Janet and sighs lovingly._/ "She's so pretty..."

Tyler - /_Also admires the picture of Janet._/ "Aw, dude. It's so hard for me to think that there's a girl out there who might be as great as Linds. Don't get me wrong, Linds is my girl and there's not one at her level. ... But this Janet babe's awfully close..."

Cody - /_Admires__ the picture of Janet as well and sighs._/ "I wonder if she's dating any one..."

* * *

"Well..." Chris began to say. "I think I'll just let one of the other candidates debate with you about the reasoning for your running in the first place. Moving on." He pulled a random card from the stack and grinned. "Oh, I think Harold will take this one. Our school officials ask, is there a moment in your life you personally regret having done?"

A rather sizable gasp was heard from the audience. Harold's eyes immediately shot wide open and swallowed. He managed to glance over to see Courtney give a look to him. Her glare being masked by the need to maintain a professional appearance. One did not have to be a rocket scientist to know exactly what his answer was going to be.

Harold sighed. "Well, it's pretty obvious, really," he began. "I got Courtney eliminated on the show because I wanted to get back at Duncan for all the bullying he did to me. But in retrospect, it was a really bad idea. I didn't feel any better, Duncan kept on pushing me around, and I made an enemy out of Courtney. I've been trying to apologize to her..." He paused to glance over at Courtney. She had not changed her expression at all. He sighed again. "But I guess an opportunity to do that never really happened. So maybe this would be as good of a time as any to say... I'm really sorry for cheating you out of possibly winning the competition back on the island, Courtney."

The audience gave out a very sympathetic cheers. And then all of the attention turned to Courtney. She looked relatively the same, though some could see that she was tapping her fingers on the podium. Even fewer could swear that her eye brows were starting to curve to a more sympathetic position.

"Our show isn't called '_Total Drama_' for nothing, folks," Chris stated gleefully. "But alas, we got a debate to get moving. So let's get to our next question." He pulled out the next random card from the pile. "Our school officials wish the ask you the following, Chelsea. Would you approve of the school allowing distinguished programs-- wink, wink-- to film on campus over the next two years in an effort to provide public exposure?"

Chelsea cleared her throat. "Under the circumstances, I would approve," she answered. "Richmore Academy is a private boarding school. But standards were set so high that many aspiring students either passed because they believed they would not have the grades or were simply unaware that such a school existed. Through public exposure, potential students will get to see what kind of a school this is and how it would be to their benefit to do all that they can to attend."

"Reasonable answer," Chris noted as a round of respectable applauds was sounded from the audience. "Now then, let's see what kind of question we got for Courtney." He pulled the last random card from the stack and then shoved the rest off the podium. "Our school officials ask..." Chris paused and narrowed his eyes, going over what was written on the card. He picked up some of the other cards on the floor and raised a curious brow. Then he shrugged. "Um... I don't think this is supposed to be a question the officials would ask. In fact, I highly doubt it based on the writing. But we're gonna do it any way because somehow the rest of the cards have the same question and I think it's fun to ask you. Courtney... What kind of fantasies do you dream about in regards to your relationship with Duncan?"

Courtney blanched instantly. Virtually every student whistled, gave out cat-calls, and many of the girls were squealing in excitement. Over where the Riker Hall students were, Duncan was just as shocked to hear the question and was explaining to the hard glances he was receiving that he was not responsible.

"Um..." Courtney began to utter before she swallowed, trying with all her might to maintain a professional posture. "I-I must re-respectfully decline to answer that... that question. As I honestly believe that it has little to do with why I would be the ideal candidate to be elected as Vice President."

"That's too bad," Chris chuckled. "Would've loved to have heard an answer to that."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a picture of Janet)**

Beth - "Whoever put that question in there during the debates, that really wasn't nice. It's so personal and embarrassing to Courtney. She may have been a bit unreasonable these past few weeks, but even she doesn't deserve to be humiliated like that."

Lindsay - "Poor Cindy! I bet Douglas is really upset that Carl tried to hit on his girlfriend by asking her that question."

Duncan - /_Gets defensive._/ "Seriously, I had nothing to do with that stunt! Even I know that kind of question during a debate could cause her to lose the election. And if that happens on Tuesday, Princess's gonna swear me off for a month. If I find out who did this, I'm gonna kick their ass and shove Chef's cooking down their throat!"

Izzy - "Dash Weinstein, heroic accountant at large, checks his figures on the... uh... something..." /_Glances over at the picture of Janet for a second before returning her attention to the camera._/ "Okay, Wendell Remington, world champion racecar driver, stomps on the gas in the big... in the big race... in an important race..." /_Glances back at the picture of Janet for a few more seconds before returning to the camera._/ "Okay, how about this? Alonzo the Cruelty-Free Pirate orders his men to weigh anchor off the coast of... Hhrrrmm." /_Starts thinking for a moment before turning her attention to the picture of Janet for several more seconds._/ "Damn. I got nothin'."

Eva - "If that had been me up there in Courtney's place, I would've went straight to pretty boy and smashed his face in. That way the stupid question would not have been asked in the first place." /_Pauses and thinks for a minute._/ "You know, I did notice Heather writing a buncha stuff the other night before I went to bed. Plus she had this bucket that reeked worse than a bathroom trip for Owen. But whatever."

Heather - /_Files her nails and once again acts innocent sarcastically._/ "Me? Try to embarrass Courtney by sneaking in such a personal question in front of all those students? How could any one think I would do such a terrible deed? Why would I even want to do that in the first place?"

* * *

"It's now time for our candidates to be paired up for a quick seres of actual debating," Chris announced. "I'm feeling good tonight, so let's have Chelsea debate with Janet and Courtney debate with Harold." Courtney and Harold groaned upon hearing the last statement, though they were not surprised. "The candidates can debate whatever they wish to their hearts' content until I chime this here little bell I got." Quick taps on the bell, causing a chiming sound. "Once that sound has been made, the debate is finished. No second chances to really make your opposition look stupid, so really go for it. So let's have Chelsea and Janet kick things off, shall we? Ready? And debate!"

"Okay," Chelsea began. "A lot of the students here feel that we need a more adequate weight room at the training facility. So I would propose to our President and the faculty to expand the building so that there would be more space and a few more weight sets to be included, thereby providing the athletes with their training needs."

"Expand the building?" Janet gasped in horror. "But that's gonna put it over the Study Garden."

"So we just move the Study Garden," Chelsea stated.

"No, no you can't!" Janet cried. "Don't you remember how hard it was for them to get the Study Garden there in the first place? It was the most ecologically suitable place in the whole school for the garden to be so that the flowers and trees could grow and the nice little animals could play about without fear of getting shot at."

"Ecologically suitable?" Chelsea huffed. "Hello! It's a big empty space of green that people only go to so that they can pet some rabbits and feed the deer. No one ever studies anything there."

"Yes they do," Janet argued. "They study life in all of its splendor. They learn about the environment and how precious and beautiful it is. They get educated in the importance of maintaining the--"

The bell chimed rather suddenly. There was a second of dead silence before the audience, in particular the males, began to cheer. Janet merely blushed while Chelsea rolled her eyes and slapped a hand over her face.

"I'm pretty sure I knew where this was going," Chris said in a rather cheeky manner. "And it would've been less entertaining as it progressed. So better to stop it now before it got too boring. Besides, I wanted to give a lotta time for our main event debate." Both Courtney and Harold began to grumble with disdain for the handsome moderator. "This is gonna be so awesome! Courtney and Harold. Debate... now!"

"What is there to debate about?" Courtney asked Harold directly. "Do you even know a thing about school politics?"

"I may not have experience in school politics, but I think I have what it takes to be an acceptable person as Vice President of this school," Harold replied. Even he wasn't sure he sounded all that convincing.

"Is that so?" Courtney questioned further. She then put her game face on. "Well then, Mr. Vice President, how would you go about addressing the need for a more sufficient method of searching for books in the library?"

"I, uh..." Harold uttered before he stopped himself to babbling the first thing that came to mind. Which had absolutely nothing to do with the library. "I'd by getting a computer--"

"No electronics allowed in the library, remember?" Courtney pointed out.

"Dang," Harold said, realizing the trap he had set himself up in. "You mean we can't even set up a computer in there so that there could be a better way of searching for books?"

"If you had spent the time to do some research, you would know that the use of any form of electronics in the library had been the cause of one too many distractions from proper studying," Courtney stated. "Not even school officials are allowed to have any on their persons when entering the library."

"Do some research," Harold scoffed. "You have someone as your campaign manager to do all the research for you."

"I don't deny that I have help," Courtney said firmly. "But the fact of the matter is that I am prepared and that I know what I am getting myself into so that I can come up with solutions for problems."

"Oh really?" Harold asked. "Then how would you work the problem of searching books in the library if no electronics are allowed?"

"Simple," Courtney answered. "Establish a record on file process. The receptionist will keep record of all the books in the library, which will note whether a particular book is checked out or not."

"Wouldn't that still take a long time to look?" Harold questioned with a raised brow.

"Not if they are properly organized," Courtney replied. "And organized they will be because--"

The bell chimed.

"Okay, that was not quite as heated as I was hoping," Chris proclaimed with an annoyed look on his face. "You two were starting out so strong, then you just let Courtney yap on and on." Courtney shot him a death glare which he gleefully ignored. "Perhaps with Harold voicing his apology and the teamwork displayed on Friday, things between you two are cooling down. Guess that's it for our ratings draw. Any way, it's time for the candidates to each give their final statements. Let's do this in alphabetical order, shall we? That means you're first, Chelsea."

Chelsea cleared her throat again before speaking. "The name of Vice President comes from the Latin definition of vice, which means 'in place of,'" she began. "In government, a Vice President is elected to stand in place of the President should a necessity arise. Student government is no different. Of the four of us who remain, you must decide who would be the most qualified for the role of Vice President. To step in for the President if need be. It is my hope that you strongly believe in my skills and my abilities to serve with great capability in the role of Vice President. Place your trust in me, for I understand your needs and desires to make your academic experience a great and better one. Believe in me, for I will be able to communicate with the President and the academy officials so that they will hear your voices. Allow me the opportunity, and I will lead you to a rich and rewarding educational experience here at Richmore. Thank you."

A series of respectable applauds were sounded from the audience.

"Not too bad, no bad at all," Chris commented. "Next up, Courtney!"

Courtney took a minute herself to clear her throat before speaking. "Poet Henry David Thoreau once wrote, 'I cannot make my days longer, so I strive to make them better,'" she began. "With this election, we here at Richmore also have an opportunity to make our academic days better. I won't bore you with long winded promises about all the new and innovative things I will definitely achieve during the year in which it will be my honor and privilege to represent each and every one of you juniors, but I can say that my years of experience in student council have taught me the three most important attributes needed. Commitment, qualifications, and experience. I'll add one more. Caring. In spite of the short amount of time I've been here, I care about Richmore, and I care about each and every one of you. And together we can all make a difference. One of the things I would like to establish is a regular open forum where any junior can come and voice their concern about issues we face here at Richmore. I and the rest of the student council would then interface with the President, the faculty, and staff, so a continuous dialogue would exist. When you cast your vote for Courtney, you won't just be voting for me. You'll be voting for yourself and for every other junior. Our days won't be any longer, but they can sure be better. Thank you."

Another series of respectable applauds were sounded, only this time there was some very loud whistling as well. Courtney took notice and looked. She did all she could to keep from blushing upon seeing Duncan standing on his cheering and whistling as loud as he could, using his other hand to pump his fist in the air.

"Alrighty then," Chris said. "Let's move on to our next candidate. Janet!"

Janet giggled and blushed as a roar of cheers sounded at her name. "Hey, everyone," she said in her bashful tone. "Well, if you guys want me to be Vice President then I'll do my best to make you guys proud. But I just want to wish the other candidates luck. I'm sure any one of us is worthy of your vote. Thanks!"

The crowd once more erupted in cheers and whistling. The ever shy Janet merely waved with one hand while placing the other on her cheek. The other candidates were quite unsure what to make of all that was happening.

"Well..." Chris managed to say as the cheering died down. "I'll just hand it over to our final candidate. Harold!"

Harold pulled on his collar and cleared his throat. "Uh..." he began to utter.

He then realized that for a mere second he had frozen up. Self doubt started to seep in, believing that he had really gone way over his head in running for Vice President in a poor attempt to get back at Courtney. That was much proven when she herself had put him in his place during their debate. It didn't help that Chelsea was just as politically minded as Courtney. What Janet had going for her was the aura that she carried about her that drew people. All the of the things and more that Harold did not have. He was clearly out of place.

He then looked over into the audience and managed to spot LeShawna. One of the few people, if any, who stood by his side during all of this. He could see that she looked anxious, waiting for him to do something that would show that he could hang with the likes of Courtney and Chelsea. It was that look that was enough for him to do something incredibly bold.

"You know what?" he announced suddenly. "Who cares about this stupid election?" This statement brought about gasps from every student in the crowd. "We all know it doesn't matter who gets elected Vice President of Richmore. You think it's going to change anything around here, make one single person happier or smarter or nicer? The only person it matters to is the one who gets elected. The same pathetic charade happens every year, and everyone makes the same pathetic promises just so they can put it on their transcripts to get into college. So vote for me, because I don't even want to go to college, and I don't care, and as Vice President I won't do anything. The only promise I make is that if elected I will do any and every thing in my power to dismantle the student government, so that none of us will ever have to sit through one of these stupid assemblies again!"

The Marshmallow immediately burst into cheers and applauds. The kind that overwhelmed the whole building. Courtney and Chelsea were appalled at the audacity of what was on display while Janet merely covered her mouth in shock. LeShawna was whistling and hollering louder than any student, cheering on her man.

"Or don't vote for me, who cares?" Harold added. "Don't vote at all!" This only made the cheering even louder.

"Well now, that's certainly one way to bring an electoral debate to an end," Chris chuckled. "To any of the kiddies who can hear me, have a good night and good luck to our four candidates on Tuesday!"

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily

* * *

One of the reviews mentioned that Jessica was "the epitome of a Mary Sue." That didn't make sense to me, mostly because I guess my idea of a Mary Sue was probably different from theirs. The idea that she's perfect didn't make sense to me either because I don't think I ever wrote her out to be perfect. Just someone who would kind of fill the position of Chris since he only ever appears to the gang during the Friday Challenges and on the Confession Cam. But I'll say this. If there was ever a character I'd probably be guilty of potentially building into a Mary Sue, it would be Janet. I wanted her to be sort of a female equivalent to Justin, but in a way that utterly baffled some folks. Using Björk sort of as a basis. I will also say that writing this chapter finally revealed a plot device I can finally use Justin for. Some neat ideas appeared in the _Celebrity Manhunt's Total Drama Action Reunion Special_ episode that aired a few days ago, which I will certainly be implementing, if you haven't noticed already.

**Reviews! Send in those reviews!** I wanna hear from you guys. I also want more ideas to decorate the Confession Cam with.

---

**Next Up:** The Elections


	19. Week 6, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Nineteen

---

**(Week 6, Day 3 - Monday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

"Alright," the professor muttered after he had finished witting. There were three chalkboards, all with sliding panels that were presently positioned at the top. He turned back to the class, clapping his hands in a wiping motion to clear them of chalk remnants. "Now, who can explain Newton's Method and how you use it?"

"Uh..." Beth uttered, sheepishly raising a hand. "You can use it to solve non-linear equations?"

The professor took a good long look at Beth, causing her to bashfully drop her head inward. "That's impressive," he said. "That's really good. I'm very impressed by that. Especially since my class is called 'Non-Linear Equations.'" Some of the other students began to chuckle lightly at Beth's expense. The professor, seeing how embarrassed she felt, gave her an assuring pat on the shoulder. "But that would be no one else's fault but my own. Alright, now somebody tell me something I don't already know. Any one? Bueller? Any one?"

Izzy immediately shot her hand up and was practically begging to be called. But before the professor could acknowledge her presence, someone else spoke rather suddenly.

"Newton stole it," Noah stated. All attention was turned toward him while he merely sat still, reading a book.

"I'm sorry?" the professor asked.

"Newton stole it," Noah repeated, slowly closing his book to speak directly to the professor. "Joseph Raphson published the same method fifty years earlier. If the start value is too far removed from true zero, than it fails." Izzy appeared quite miffed, as though what he said was what she was going to say.

The professor formed a light smirk on his face. "I'm sorry, what's your name?" he asked.

"Noah," Noah replied.

"Noah," the professor repeated. "So Noah suggests that Joseph Raphson was the original author of this method. Well if that's that case, than why didn't he get any credit?"

"Well, for one thing, Newton had a better publicist," Noah responded. A number of other students chuckled to the statement. "And for another, after 1700, we know very little about Raphson, other than the fact that he discovered Kabbalah about three hundred years before Madonna." The students chuckled some more. Izzy was glaring viciously at the egghead.

"I see," the professor said with a chuckle. "Alright now, let's give Noah a chance for some extra credit, shall we? We're gonna call this the game show host problem. Noah, suppose you're on a game show and you are given a chance to choose from three different doors, alright?" He walked over and directed the students to the three chalkboards. "Now, behind one of the doors is a new car. Behind the other two, goats. Which door would you choose, Noah?"

Noah shrugged. "Door number one," he said.

"Door number one," the professor repeated. "Noah chooses door number one. Now, the game show host, who by the way knows what's behind all the other doors, decides to open another door. Let's say he chooses door number three." He walks over to the third chalkboard and pulls the panel down. Revealing a completely blank board from its previous position. "Behind which sits a goat. Now, Noah, the game show host comes up to you and says, 'Noah, do you wanna stay with door number one or go with door number two?' Now, is it in your interest to switch your choice?"

"Yeah," Noah answered without hesitation. Izzy was now furiously pulling on her hair while trying to remain quiet. The sight of this was not lost on Beth, Cody, Courtney, Ezekiel, Gwen, and Harold. They looked on with great interest.

"But wait," the professor pointed out. "Remember the host knows where the car is. So, how do you know he's not playing a trick on you? Trying to use reverse psychology to get you to pick a goat."

"I wouldn't really care," Noah stated. "My answer is based on statistics based on variable change."

"Variable change?" the professor questioned. "But he just asked you a simple question."

"Yeah, but you changed everything," Noah responded. Izzy had now clenched her teeth in rage and was constantly trying to bang her head on her desk, only to miss making direct contact by mere centimeters. Gwen was finding this rather humorous.

"Enlighten us," the professor proposed.

Noah shrugged again. "Well, when I was originally asked to choose a door, I had a 33.3 percent chance of choosing right," he explained. "But after he opens one of the doors and then reoffers me the choice, it's now 66.7 percent, if I choose to switch. So yeah, I'll take door number two and thank you for the extra 33.3 percent."

There was a long pause with the professor staring at Noah. Almost daring him to show some kind of emotion. Moments later, the professor cracked a smile. "Exactly!" he proclaimed. Some of the other students gasped in astonishment. Izzy was reaching her arms out toward Noah's direction, shaking as though she was trying to choke him. Gwen continued to enjoy watching all of this. "People remember, if you don't know which door to open, always account for variable change. Now, see most people wouldn't take the switch out of paranoia, fear, emotions. But Noah, he kept emotions aside and let simple math get his ass into 'a brand new car!' Which is better than that goat you've been driving around campus." The school bell began to ring. "Alright everybody, that's the end of the day. Thank you very much."

Noah immediately turned in his seat so that he was facing Izzy. The redhead was sitting with her arms crossed, fuming and shooting a death glare at him. Noah stuck his tongue out at her. Izzy responded by doing the same, wanting to one-up him by sticking her tongue out even further. Gwen started to laugh as she got up from her desk to leave the room.

"Your graded papers are down here at the end," the professor reminded the students. "You can pick them up on your way out. And don't forget to vote tomorrow, in-spite of what some candidates say."

It was Courtney and Harold's turn to glare at one another.

* * *

**(Confessions Cam)**

Beth - "Izzy was really angry with Noah. For some reason, that was the strangest thing I had ever seen her do."

Ezekiel - "Izzy l'ooked scary in class t'ooday, eh. Is she tryin' t'oo say that girls don't like it when g'ooys try to be smarter than them? Bec'oose I already learned my less'oon 'oon that back 'oon the island."

Gwen - /_Is in the middle of laughing._/ "I'm sorry, but I just found the idea of Izzy getting all mad at Noah for trying to be smarter than her funny. It's not everyday you get the chance to witness her wanting oh so badly to cause bodily harm to someone, but was unable to. All that was missing was background music."

Noah - /_Is reading a book, not looking at the camera._/ "I felt the need to do something to keep Izzy from hogging all of the attention in our classes. Every time there is a challenging problem present, she immediately leaps in a full head of steam to show off to everyone just how smart she was. I wasn't going to let her do it forever so I made the conscious decision to put my foot down and show her that there were other geniuses in the room too."

Izzy - /_Looking miffed, holds up a picture of Noah at the camera._/ "Here's the quote-unquote 'world famous' beagle, sitting on his doghouse, indulging in his overactive imagination. Not content with his lot in life. And who can blame him, what with an anhedonic bald child for a 'master' and only a small bird with a speech impediment for a companion. He creates a rich inner world into which he escapes. And the only thing more tragic? The actual content of his delusions. A lurking vulture? A self-involved hipster in dark glasses? A biplane pilot? Biplane? Seriously?" /_She turns the picture to look at it. Then she pulls out a sharpie and starts scribbling on it. Satisfied, she turns it back toward the camera, showing that she has drawn Snoopy features on the image of Noah._/ "Some people lead pathetic, miserable little lives."

Chris - /_Is reading a statement in an uninterested manner._/ "The producers... wish to point... out... that any... opinions... made... by the students... in this... room... are not... view... points... shared by... any... member... of the... production... staff. We... apo... apo..." /_Pretends to look closer at the word as though he was having trouble reading it._/ "Ah. We apo-lo-gize... to any... persons... who dislike... the comments... made... by Izzy... involving... _Peanuts_. In fact... we on the... production... staff... are big fans... of Charles M. Schulz... and his... much beloved... comic... strip. Please... do not... make... angry... phone calls... or send... threatening... letters... in regards... to this... unfortunate... misunderstanding. It will not... happen... again." /_Flips over the piece of paper to see if there is more before facing the camera._/ "Too bad we can't promise to make Izzy stop being Izzy."

Courtney - /_Speaking through clenched teeth._/ "It's getting harder and harder to maintain my focus. Tomorrow, I'm either going to be on the student council or I'm going to cave Harold's goddamned head in. And with that final statement of his last night, I'm leaning dangerously close to the latter."

Harold - /_Arms crossed and nose in the air._/ "I make my apology public and she still won't acknowledge it. I have done everything I could possibly think of to get her to at least accept it. What do I get in return? Nothing. Well gosh dang it, I'm not going to sit here and worry about it any further. I hope I do get on the student council tomorrow just so I can rub it in her stupid face."

* * *

**(The Others)**

"Hey, guys?" DJ said rather nervously. "I may not be too sure, but I got this funny feelin' that we're a man short." Everyone stopped walking and looked around from within the group.

"Ohmygosh, did, like, someone get kidnapped?" Sadie gasped. She then immediately wrapped himself in a tight embrace with Katie, who did the same in return.

"I hope we don't get kidnapped," Katie whimpered. "But if we, like, so do, my Noah-Bear would come to the rescue."

"You two are idiots," Eva grunted, rolling her eyes. "I highly doubt any one could successfully kidnap Duncan." At the same time, most of the males present in the group raised curious brows and mouthed "Noah-Bear" in a questionable manner.

"You frontin' me," LeShawna moaned. "Does that punk have to spend every free moment he gets tryin' to pull somethin' on me or my man? Because I'm really gettin' sick and tired of this."

"You're not the only one," Bridgette sighed. "I just want all of this drama to be over with."

"For real, dudes," Geoff said, wrapping an arm around the shoulders of his surfer girlfriend in support. "All this fighting has really killed a lot of the mojo around here. We should be having fun, not worry about who's gonna hit who."

"Tell that to Prissy-Pants' boyfriend," LeShawna said. "I'm more than willin' to put a stop to all this. I'm even willin' to hold him down while y'all confront him about it."

"But why is Doogal missing in the first place?" Lindsay asked curiously. "Didn't we, like, just see him in the classroom we were in or something? He couldn't have just vanished into thin air." She suddenly gasped. "Unless he can. Maybe that's why he was so good back on the island. Because he could vanish into thin air!" Most of the more mentally equipped members of the others merely stared at the blonde.

"I dunno about you guys, but I'm starting to get real hungry here," Trent said, changing the subject.

"Me too!" Owen nearly cried. "I haven't had anything since breakfast. Man I'm starving!"

"Dude, you ate a dozen pancakes four hours ago," Tyler pointed out. "How can you suddenly be starving like you haven't eaten in four days? Is that even possible?"

"We're better off not knowing," Eva stated. "Let's just get to the cafeteria before fat boy here starts to lose it because he doesn't have lunch in his hands."

The group made their way over to the cafeteria. When the arrived, they found the entrance blocked by a equally large group of students. It appeared that they were all crowding around at least one person. Out of curiosity, the Riker Hall students looked to get a closer look at the person beneath the spotlight.

"Look, everyone!" a seemingly familiar voice called from within the crowd. "It's the guys from _Total Drama Island_!" The crowd turned to get a good look at the group. They then parted, revealing the person who had moments earlier been the center of attention. As it turned out, this person was also the voice who pointed out the group.

"And you must be Janet," Trent responded back. "Fancy meeting you here."

Janet giggled, lightly twirling a loose strand of hair from the ponytail hanging over her right shoulder. Her light blue hair clashed just as badly with the school uniform as it did with the clothes she wore during the debate. "My friends have trying to get me to meet you guys," she said in her mousy voice. "We're big fans."

"Sure sounds like it," Eva muttered quietly.

"You must be Trent," Janet said, completely oblivious to the comment made toward her. "I thought you and Gwen made a really cute couple on the show. We really liked when you sang that song in the talent show episode."

"Thanks," Trent said with a smile. "Really appreciate that."

"But they're not the only cute couple, are they?" a female whispered aloud from behind Janet.

"Guys," Janet bashfully said to the other girl. She then shyly turned her attention to Geoff and Bridgette. "You guys also made a really cute couple. We all thought it was so sweet of you, Geoff, to volunteer for Bridgette's dare in that one episode."

"Thanks!" Geoff said proudly. He pulled Bridgette closer into his half-embrace, eliciting coos from many of the female students.

"Geoff still is a sweetheart," Bridgette giggled.

"When they're not sucking face," Eva commented quietly.

"And I think you guys make a really cute couple, too," Janet said to Lindsay and Tyler. "There was a lot of giggling when you two were making out while rolled up in a yo-yo."

"Aww, that's so nice of you, Jenna," Lindsay said. Tyler simply wore a grin that stretched from ear to ear.

Janet giggled. "Call me Janet," she said, as if ignoring that Lindsay said her name incorrectly.

"You have very pretty hair," Owen commented rather suddenly.

"Aww, thank you," Janet responded, blushing lightly. "You have pretty hair, too. So you're Owen. The one who won the whole thing, right? That was really brave of you to give a sleeping bear a purple nurple."

"Yeah, that was really scary," Owen recalled. "Almost as scary as well Izzy later wanted me to tickle a cheetah's behind." Most everyone within hearing distance looked at Owen with great concern.

Janet merely giggled. "I bet," she said. She then turned her attention to the next pair. "Aww, Katie and Sadie! I felt really bad when you guys found out you squatted over poison ivy on the first day."

"I know, right?" Katie said. "It was, like, so itchy."

"We had to, like, sit in the beach water for thirty minutes," Sadie added.

"Just another reason why we lost," Eva grumbled in a low voice.

"Eva!" Janet cheered. The tough girl instinctively shot straight up in surprise as the blue-haired girl came to her. "When I heard you made the wrestling team, I figured you would make a great fit since you handled that Sasquatchanakwa."

"Uh... thanks?" Eva managed to say.

Janet giggled again before turning her attention. "And you're LeShawna," she said. "That was really clever of you in the hide and seek episode where you stayed under water until Chef was completely out of sight."

"Girl, it was nothin'," LeShawna said with a smile. "That big gorilla may have huntin' skills, but he was easier to trick than a monkey lookin' for some bananas."

"I heard that!" Chef yelled from inside the cafeteria.

"Do I look like I care?" LeShawna yelled back, causing Janet to giggle.

"And what did you think about me?" Justin said, shoving LeShawna from Janet's view and striking a pose.

"Oh my," Janet gasped, her cheeks beginning to blush a deep shake of pink upon seeing Justin. She then began to giggle bashfully and uncontrollably. "Well... You were rather handsome with that dance routine in the talent show episode..."

"Bunny!" DJ suddenly cried. Everyone turned their attention over to see him picking up his pet rabbit in a near panic. "That was a close one, little guy. How'd you get out of your cage? You coulda gotten hurt out here."

It was then that there was a loud squealing noise. Most everyone looked to see that it was Janet who cooed as she immediately rushed over to where DJ was. A sight that made Justin look on in confusion.

"Is that Bunny?" Janet asked in a highly excited tone.

"Um... yeah..." DJ said rather nervously.

"Oh, he's such a cutie!" Janet squealed, gently petting the rabbit behind the ears. "That was my favorite scene from the entire show. I was crying when you were reunited with him. You're the most kind-hearted person on there and it would have made me so sad if you had lost Bunny for good."

"Yeah..." DJ said breathlessly. He gave out a sigh, watching Janet coo over the pet nestled in his hands. Most everyone else watching were cooing themselves at the sight. Though no one paid any attention to Justin, who was glaring unhappily at the scene he was forced to witness before him.

"What's all the fuss about?" a new voice spoke. LeShawna, Geoff, and Bridgette where the only ones who looked to notice Duncan walking up to them. He looked far from refreshed.

"And where the hell have you been, punk?" LeShawna demanded.

"You don't wanna know," Duncan sighed. "Besides, none of you would even believe me if I told you."

"That go for the scratch marks on your face, bra?" Geoff asked curiously.

"Especially the scratch marks on my face," Duncan replied.

"You know the school officials are not gonna be happy that your uniform is messed up," Bridgette pointed out.

"At this point, I really don't give a damn," Duncan said. "Right now, I need something to eat."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "I just know that white boy is up to somethin' no good. It's like every chance he gets he spends it on tryin' to take a swipe at my man. First chance I get, I'm smackin' him so hard up in the face, he'll look like Lon Chaney in Phantom of the Opera."

Duncan - /_Hisses as he wipes scratch marks on his face._/ "The things I do for Princess. Man, I'm taking a huge gamble on this one. These scratches will be the least of my worries if this doesn't work out."

DJ - /_Holds and pets Bunny._/ "Janet is a really nice person to meet. Turns out that she and I have a lot in common. We both like animals, love our mamas, and she tells me that she's not too shabby at ribbon twirling."

Justin - /_Is looking miffed._/ "Just when I had her, Dorkahontas manages to charm her with his stupid pet? Well DJ, you just messed with the wrong handsome face. When I set my eyes on something I want, I get it. Any. Way. Possible."

Eva - "I dunno about you, but I get the strange feeling there was someone else missing in the group other than Duncan. I just can't put my finger on it." /_Thinks for a moment then shrugs._/ "Ah well. Probably wasn't any one important."

Tyler - /_Puts the finishing touches assembling a cabinet up against the wall._/ "There we go, babe. A Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet. All ready for use."  
Lindsay - /_Cooing._/ "Aww, Timmy! You shouldn't have."  
Tyler - "I managed to even snag the Hoochie-Girl Hair Shiner from Chris' stash that you like so much."  
Lindsay - /_Squeals._/ "Oh, Tiger!" /_Suddenly pounces on Tyler for a kiss. Both fall to the floor and start making out. They bump against the cabinet a few times, causing some objects to spill. Giggling noise is heard before the making out resumes._/

Cody - /_Watches where he steps._/ "Looks like someone was spilling face powder, some perfume..." /_Pauses and then blushes at the sight of something._/ "Um... Do I even wanna know what that is?"

* * *

**(Week 6, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

With classes finished, the students decided to hang out in The Marshmallow while awaiting the results of the election. As one would have expected, Courtney and Harold were sitting as far away from one another as the amphitheater would allow. They were joined by their respective love interests. Also on Courtney's side was Noah, Katie, and Sadie. Noah because he was Courtney's campaign manager. Katie because she wanted to snuggle up against her boyfriend. Sadie so that she could watch her would-be twin snuggle up against Noah.

The rest of the students were scattered about. In one group, there was Gwen, Trent, Bridgette, Geoff, and Ezekiel. Gwen was looking to collect more ideas from Bridgette and Ezekiel to decorate the living space. Trent and Geoff were naturally there just to be with their respective girlfriends. In another section, Lindsay was sitting on Tyler's lap as they engaged in another long make out session. Beth and Cody were sitting a couple seats away, shyly watching.

Izzy was engaged in being stealthy, wearing an army hat with deer antlers as she attempted to sneak up on Noah. Owen followed along dutifully. Eva leaned back in her seat and was taking a nap. Heather slouched in her seat, filing her nails. DJ relaxed in his seat, petting his pet rabbit Bunny. Justin sat a few seats away from behind, staring holes into the back of the other's head.

This went on for what seemed like an hour before Jessica appeared on the stage. The students turned their attention to the Resident Assistant as she made her way to an open podium left over from the debate on Sunday. She straightened her notes and cleared her throat before speaking.

"Most of you already know this by now, but bare with me as I restate how all this works," she announced. "Four major offices, eight seats on student council. Each class elects one office and two representatives. Being that we are the junior class, we are considering for Vice President. The school officials ultimately select who is elected to the office seat, but your votes hold major sway over who they'll pick. Student council representatives are elected based on your votes. This is why, if you recall, you had to put two names on the ballots."

"If I may repeat what I said earlier," Gwen called out. "This school sure has a weird procedure in putting together their student council. Hate to see how they determine the school officials."

"Any further interruptions before I announce the results?" Jessica asked. "No? Good. So any way, here's how it went down." She adjusted her glasses and looked down at the notes in her hand. "Elected to the position of Vice President is Janet. Elected to be representatives of the student council are Chelsea and Courtney. That is all. Thank you and have a pleasant evening."

The students gasped upon hearing the results in-spite of the seemingly casual manner in which they were announced. Every one of them seemed to be wearing expressions of shock and disbelief. None were more surprised than Courtney and Harold.

"I call bull--/**censored**/!" LeShawna hollered as she got to her feet. "There ain't no way that aged cheddar chick got more votes than my sugar baby without cheatin'!"

"Oh, that's sure to change the results," Duncan stated sarcastically. "Calling Courtney a cheater is will suddenly make it so that Harold is on the student council and not her. Hell, if any one would know anything about manipulating the votes, it's your four-eyed dweeb of a boyfriend over there."

"On the count of three, I'm comin' over there to kick your ass!" LeShawna threatened. "I have every goddamned reason to believe you pulled somethin' to get your bitch of a girlfriend elected!"

"If any cheating had taken place, it would have been dealt with prior to the announcing of the results," Jessica proclaimed, calmly looking to defuse the present situation. "The results were fair and square. Chelsea and Courtney had more votes than Harold."

Throughout the entire exchange, both Courtney and Harold maintained their shocked expressions. Izzy was perched on Owen's shoulders and eating from a bowl of popcorn that somehow appeared on the big guy's head. DJ and ducked down underneath his seat in horror. Sadie was clutching Katie from behind, the latter clutching Noah's arm.

"Are you absolutely sure there was no way the votes were tampered with?" Cody asked.

"Positive," Jessica answered. "Under security measures that prisons and juvenile detentions would kill for."

"What could have possibly happened between the end of the debate and the elections to cause all the juniors to suddenly drop their support for Harold?" Trent questioned. "His final statement is still fresh on everyone's minds."

"I highly doubt people at this school would be stupid enough to take his suggestion of not voting so seriously," Gwen added. "His message of wanting to abolish the system as a whole would've surely gotten him enough votes."

"Obviously that ended up not being the case," Duncan pointed out. "Harold did not get voted. End of story."

"No, it's not end of story," LeShawna huffed. "There's somethin' fishy about all this and I'm gonna find out what it is. And I'm gonna start by beatin' your punk ass until you cough up the truth."

"I may be a troublemaker, but I'm an honest one, goddammit," Duncan said in his defense. "I had nothing to do with somehow making Harold lose enough votes that he didn't get elected."

"But you have to admit that it's a little suspicious," Bridgette noted. "Harold did absolutely nothing to warrant suddenly losing so much support within a day. Not to mention you suddenly disappeared from the group before lunch yesterday."

"I agree that there's something not right about all this," Duncan stated. "But I sure as hell had nothing to do with it. And there's nothing that's forcing me to stick with you guys at all times during school days. I'm allowed to up and leave the pack any time we're not in class. Hell, I did it all the time. You guys had no problem with it before."

"Well, this time it sure seems like a bit of a coincidence, bra," Geoff pointed out.

"What evidence do you have that I even did anything in that time I was away from the group between our leaving the classroom and getting the cafeteria?" Duncan questioned. "That time only lasted ten minutes. So what the hell could I have possibly done in ten minutes to get people not to vote for Harold?"

"You give me ten minutes and I'll beat the answer outta you!" LeShawna yelled.

"Forget it," Harold sighed, a mixed of frustration and defeat in the tone of his voice. "I give up." He got up and slowly shuffled his way out of The Marshmallow, slouching forward and his head hanging down.

"Baby," LeShawna tried to call in a pleading voice. She watched almost helplessly as her lanky boyfriend kept on going before going through the double doors. After a moment of staring in the direction Harold left through, she turned her attention back to Duncan and shot him a death glare. "Congratulations. You made my man's life a livin' hell. Now I'm gonna do the same to you. Only ten times worse." She then started marching out of the amphitheater after her boyfriend.

After that, there was a long moment of silence.

"Well..." Eva muttered after smacking her lips. "I, for one, never thought politics could be this exciting."

* * *

**(Confessions Cam - Now with a Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet)**

Bridgette - "Poor Harold. I can't possibly fathom how dejected he must be feeling. He seemed for sure to be getting into the student council after that closing statement of his on Sunday."

Geoff - "Man, all the fun vibes seemed to have just been sucked out of the room. I don't like to accuse folks of doing sneaky stuff because that's a buzz killer, dude. But there's something not right about how the elections went down, bra."

Katie - "Like, ohmygosh, that was so intense."  
Sadie - "I know. Harold looked, like, really sad."  
Katie - "Noah said that, like, even he couldn't figure how Harold didn't get enough votes."  
Sadie - "You voted for Harold, right?"  
Katie - "Like, d'uh. Noah wanted me to vote for Courtney too, but I don't like her."  
Sadie - "Me neither."

Owen - "This has been really weird day. First, Izzy tells me that she needs my help spying on Noah because she thinks he has some kind of evil plot. Then all this yelling between Duncan and LeShawna occurred again. I wonder what that was all about?"

Trent - "Gwen and I have been discussing the issue and we think that there might be a slight possibility that Duncan had nothing to do with Harold losing votes. His disappearing from the group yesterday before lunch was a coincidence, sure. Only it seems too much of a coincidence. This is foul play at its worst."

Courtney - /_Sits in silence, tapping her fingers together._/ "... I won... But... I don't feel very good about it..."

Eva - "After what happened in The Marshmallow, I'm thinking back to that gut feeling I had that there was someone else aside from Duncan who was missing from the group yesterday. I just can't figure it out."

* * *

**(Week 6, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

Heather stood still upon the platform. The toga she wore was silky soft upon her skin, which she liked very much. She could get used to its feeling. With a smile on her face, she looked up to the seats before her. Curving in an arc were twelve chairs. At the center were obviously the two highest ranking. Madison and Jeremy. Hera and Zeus.

"This meeting of the Dodekatheon will come to order," Jeremy, or rather Zeus, commanded. "On this night, we honor our dear Athena for getting elected into the Richmore Academy student council." A quiet series of applauds was sounded. Several seats over to Jeremy's left sat Chelsea, or Athena, who simply nodded. "We also honor and admittance to the lady Heather."

Heather bowed upon hearing her name called. She was addressed as "the lady Heather." It had a nice ring. She could get used to being called that however often it happened.

"The lady Heather succeed in achieving the primary objective of getting me elected," Athena noted. "For that, she is granted membership. She has proven herself to be a worthy asset to our goals."

"So it shall be," Madison, or Hera, stated. "However, I wish to bring before the masters and mistresses a question on concern regarding the performance of the lady Heather." Heather remained still and tried to show no sign of emotion. "Athena gave you a secondary objective in preventing the mortal named Courtney from being elected. It would seem you failed to achieve this. Explain yourself, lady Heather."

Heather took a deep breath. "Honorable masters and mistresses," she began, looking to speak in the same manner as they were. "I proceeded with ensuring the mortal Courtney was not to be elected, seeing to it that her campaign was sabotaged to the best of my abilities. However, it was my belief that the target was to be changed following the end of the debate on Sunday."

"You are referring to that abomination of a statement that mortal named Harold made, am I correct?" Athena asked.

"You are correct," Heather replied. "As troublesome as the mortal Courtney would have been, the mortal Harold would have been far worse. So it was that I determined that he should be the one prevented from being elected."

"I take it that was your handy work on Monday," Zeus noted with a nod. "That was quite an incident you were responsible for. And on such short notice, too. Impressive."

"It goes to show that I am willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish something that I feel strong adamant about," Heather stated. "Even when I have to do so with little time to spare."

"Nevertheless, that was a bold decision you made there, lady Heather," Hera said. "You purposefully abandoned the objective of ensuring the mortal Courtney was not elected, instead changing to the target to the mortal Harold under the belief that he would prove to be a more problematic adversity than the other."

"Call it being inspired by the wisdom of Athena," Heather said.

Those seated before her began to speaking quietly amongst themselves. No doubt debating what ruling to make on the matter. As they spoke, Heather took a moment to take that one of the twelve seats was empty. She didn't quite remember all of the Olympians right off the top of her head and therefore could not determine which rank within the Dodekatheon was vacant.

"The lady Heather made a bold decision," Zeus announced. "To discard an assignment in an effort to perform a task worthy of tribute. So it shall be that we too will make a bold decision."

Hera stood up and slowly descended down upon the steps separating her from Heather. Upon reaching the platform, she pulled something from behind her back and handed it over to Heather. Heather looked down at the object she held. It was roughly as big as her hand and it began to glow. It was a pendant in the shape of a crescent moon.

"The lady Heather has shown herself to be capable to terminate a target with ruthless and aggressive efficiency," Zeus continued. "Talent worthy of the title 'Mistress of the Hunt.'" Heather looked up. First in surprise. Then her lips formed a confident smile. "Never have we crowned a member into our ranks so quickly. Yet the lady Heather has proven to be invaluable to our goals. Take your rightful seat amongst the Twelve... Artemis."

Heather smiled wider with pride. Hera led her to the empty seat. Heather sat down and then watched as Hera placed an olive crown upon her head. The pride and confidence she felt only growing. Now she wasn't just Heather. Amongst the Dodekatheon, she was Artemis, Mistress of the Hunt.

* * *

**(Confessions Cam)**

Heather - /_Is wearing her regular clothes._/ "Ever since Chris dragged our butts here, I've been trying to come up with a spectacular way to get back at these freaks for all the headaches I had to endure from them back on the island." /_She pulls out her crescent moon pendant and waves it gently._/ "Now I have the backing I need to enact a plot so devious it would make all the tricks I've pulled so far look like child's play."

Noah - "Since Courtney was elected to the student council, it means she'll also have to deal with Chelsea. Being the committed 'Chief of Staff,' I asked Jessica for some details on this Dodekatheon clique. She wouldn't tell me much other than the fact that she was previously part of the main twelve members. Ranks are based upon the names of the Greek Gods, presumably because they have skills in connection with their specific deity. Before she got the boot, Jessica apparently used to be Artemis."

* * *

**(Week 6, Day 6 - Thursday)**

Courtney took a deep breath and brought her hand up to the door. She hesitated for a second and bit her lip. Then she very lightly tapped on the door a couple times. She thought about leaving right then and there when the door began to open. The person she wished to speak to appeared, taking one good look at her and then sighing before trying to close the door.

"Wait," she practically cried. "Just hear me out, okay."

"Why should I?" Harold questioned. "You're probably just gonna gloat that you got elected and I didn't."

"I won't," Courtney responded. "I promise, I'm not here to gloat. I just..." She took another deep breath. "I just wanna say... how sorry I am. About all the abuse and mistreatment I've been giving you the last few weeks."

"Yeah, sure," Harold said. "I seem to have a hard time believing that all things considered."

"Harold, please," Courtney practically begged. "I'm trying to do something I should've done a long time ago. Putting a stop to all this pathetic nonsense and accept your apology."

Harold narrowed his eyes a bit, looking at her from top to bottom. She was not hiding anything behind her. She certainly looked like she was about to break into tears in any second. There might have even been a hint of sincerity in the tone of her voice.

"I let my pride get in the way of reason and it has resulted in nothing more than a series of idiotic excuses," Courtney continued. "It was not fair for you to have put up with my arrogance and for that I'm really sorry. I'm even sorry for not recognizing how valuable you really were on the island. Judging a book by its cover and not its content, as they would say."

"I bet you don't feel guilty for pummeling me with a lamp post, though," Harold pointed at.

Courtney sighed. "I... I forgive you," she said. "I forgive you for getting me booted off the island. Just as I hope you'll forgive me for the way I treated you since we got here."

Harold continued to look at her suspiciously. Though he had to admit that she seemed to be completely honest with him so far. He decided to test that honesty further. "Did you have anything to do with the incident on Monday that caused me to lose votes in the election?" he asked.

Courtney shook her head. "I had nothing to do with that," she replied. "Even I wouldn't stoop to such a level, regardless of the things I've done to you."

"But I bet Duncan would," Harold noted aloud.

"I want to say he had nothing to do with that either," Courtney said. "I'm just not sure, though."

It was with this statement that Harold began to believe she was being sincere with him. He was maintaining his doubts until he could see that she was speaking with a sense of guilty. Even for something that, for all he knew, she and Duncan had absolutely nothing to do with. Courtney was honestly accepting his apology.

"Then I guess I forgive you for the stuff you pulled on me here at the school," he said with a sigh. "I felt like I had been patient enough about waiting for you to hear me out. But I've realized I was only making it worse by provoking you with my actions."

"Truce?" Courtney asked, extending a hand out for a shake.

Harold stared at her hand for a moment. Then he sighed and took it. "Truce," he said.

"For what it's worth, you should have been elected," Courtney stated after they shook hands. "I shouldn't have stood a chance after that closing statement you gave on Sunday."

"That's good to know," Harold said.

There was a long moment of awkward silence before they both gave out individual sighs. "Well..." Courtney said, breaking the silence. "I guess that's it then."

"Yeah..." Harold uttered.

"Yeah..." Courtney sighed again. "... Well... Good night."

"Night," Harold said back.

Courtney slowly turned away just as Harold was closing the door. She made her way down the hallway toward her room when another door opened up. She flinched. Then she flinched again upon seeing that on the other end was LeShawna.

"Don't worry, Prissy-Pants," LeShawna said. "I ain't gonna hit ya. Not tonight, at least."

"But you still want to hit me, right?" Courtney questioned.

LeShawna sighed. "Look, you and Harold called a truce," she said. "So I won't do anythin' for now. But you can bet I'm still mad at you for all the shenanigans you and your punk boyfriend pulled. As long as your cool, I'll be cool. The second you start throwin' your weight around, I'm throwin' mine right back at you. Understand?"

"Crystal," Courtney replied. "Though I highly doubt Duncan is gonna relent any less."

"Then my problem will be with him," LeShawna said. "Just so long as you don't do the same, I won't be confrontin' you. Alright?"

"Alright," Courtney answered with a nod.

The two stared at one another before Courtney turned away and LeShawna closed the door. With a sigh, Courtney finally made it to her room. It was mere minutes before midnight and she was getting extremely tired. She opened the door and was suddenly witness to a scene that utterly bewildered her.

"What the hell is this?" she uttered.

"Um... I can explain?" Duncan managed to say with an embarrassed smile. He then groaned as he made another attempt to pull the raccoon off of his face. "I wanted to surprise you, but someone didn't wanna cooperate."

"Duncan, what are you doing in my room?" Courtney began to ask. "Where's Bridgette? And why is there a raccoon clawing at your face?" Duncan didn't answer at first. She crossed her arms, waiting for him to actually say something. Then she took a good look around the room. In particular, what appeared to be a dog crate and feeding bowls next to her bed. She looked up at Duncan with a curious brow raised.

"Surprise?" Duncan uttered.

That was when Courtney figured it out. "Your giving me that raccoon as a pet?" she summarized. "Are you insane?"

"Hey, I went through a lot of effort for this," Duncan said. "It was a last minute decision to get you a pet, but I couldn't leave the school during the weekday. So I had to come up with every possible trick in the book to get the school officials to have her accepted as a pet. And that's before getting her the rabies shots and the filing of her claws."

"Apparently the latter didn't work," Courtney noted.

"No, it did work," Duncan responded. "She just has a good grip."

Courtney stared at her boyfriend, as well as the raccoon, for a moment and then sighed. "Couldn't you have found a different animal on campus to pass off as a pet?" she asked.

"I looked high and low, babe," Duncan replied. "The raccoon was the best I could get. Because even I know there was no chance in hell you would have accepted a rat."

Courtney gagged. "Point taken," she said. Then she walked closer and managed to slowly pet the raccoon. "Do you think she would be okay with me holding her?"

"If you think you're up to it," Duncan said, gladly handing the raccoon over to his girlfriend.

Courtney held the raccoon at a distance at first. When the pet didn't react, she pulled her in closer. Soon she was holding the raccoon comfortably. "Guess she likes me," she commented with a slight giggle.

"Whew," Duncan sighed. "That's good to know. So, what'cha gonna call her? I already thought up the perfect name for her, but she's all yours, so you get to do the honors."

Courtney thought for a moment. "I got it," she said. "I'm gonna call her... Brittany."

Duncan blinked. "Brittany?" he repeated. "You're gonna call a raccoon Brittany?"

"I dunno," Courtney replied, repeating the condescending tone she sensed in his voice. "You're gonna give your girlfriend a raccoon for a pet?"

"Touché," Duncan answered. He then gave out a sigh. "So... Wanna make out?"

"You pig!" Courtney hissed as she gently placed Brittany down on top of her bed. "You managed to be a gentleman by giving me a pet and you expect sex in return?"

"Hey, you were the one thinking that, Princess," Duncan pointed out. "I was merely asking for a ki--"

He never got the chance to finish as he suddenly found his mouth being covered by hers at the exact moment she pounced onto him. They both fell to the floor and began making out, complete with sensual moans every tenth of a second. Brittany appeared rather confused about her surroundings. She was further confused when a pink bra was thrown up and landed on her head.

It was then that the cameras powered off in accordance with the midnight curfew.

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet

* * *

Let me say again that the comment above involving _Peanuts_ was not in any way, shape, or form intended to be an insult to the series. I'm a _Peanuts_ fan myself. I just found the ramble hilarious when I first read it and thought it would be a good fit for Izzy to use under the condition that she was in. And if any one thought it was done in bad taste, I humbly apologize.

It's over! The elections story arc is finally over! That means I can do the challenge I've been dying to do for months now! Hopefully it will have been worth the wait because I'm going stir crazy about it. While on the subject of the elections story arc, your guys' reviews of the last chapter provided a great deal of inspiration about the way to close things out. It also offered the opportunity to expand upon the Dodekatheon subplot, which I will revisit over time. I guess what I'm trying to say is **keep sending in those reviews!** They help! Same with suggesting decoration ideas for the Confession Cam.

By the way, if you haven't noticed yet, I finally managed to write up the cookie for **The Kobold Necromancer**. It's a one-shot called _Smell_. Please check it out and review it.

---

**Next Up:** The Most Anticipated Challenge of the Century


	20. Week 6, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty

---

**(Week 6, Day 7 - Friday)**

"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it's Friday Night!" Chris proclaimed. "Are! You! Ready?" The jam-packed crowed within The Marshmallow cheered at the top of their lungs. "Then for the thousands in attendance and the millions watching at home... LET'S GET READY FOR CHALLENGE NIGHT!"

On the stage, a band began playing the Total Drama theme. It was a mixture of the hard rock sound that, for whatever reason, also included a piano and a horn section. The strange fusion of sounds did not matter to the audience as they cheered and clapped along to the music until it reached its end. Then they cheered some more.

"Another hand for the band known as SBS, everyone," Chris announced.

"Hey, it's my fraternity brothers!" Owen cried. "Woo-hoo! Delta Tau Chi! You guys were awesome!"

"Owen!" the band cheered in unison, banging their heads in his direction.

"I swear, I think my IQ just started to drop," Heather grumbled.

"Me too," Lindsay said in a rather excited tone.

"So how about we get this baby going before it turns stupid, shall we?" Chris said with a chuckle. "We start by introducing tonight's special guest judge... your newly elected Vice President of the Richmore Academy student council, Janet!"

The Marshmallow once again exploded and wild cheers as Janet shyly came out onto the stage. She gave a light wave, only making the crowd get louder. With a blush, she took her seat on the side of the stage.

"First off, congratulations on being elected," Chris said to the guest. "I'm sure you've been spending a lotta time thanking every single junior at school, even though the school officials were the ones to ultimate pick the office seats. But that's not the point. The point is, are you excited about taking part in tonight's festivities?"

Janet giggled. "I think I am," she replied.

"Well, alrighty then!" Chris said, not wasting any more time. "Tonight's challenge will once again be a good ol' fashioned 'Battle of the Sexes.'" The crowd cheered at this announcement. The twenty-two students on stage, instead, rolled their eyes and shrugged. "Oh, but it gets better! For tonight, our twenty-two unlucky students will be competing in what could very well be the single most diabolical concoction ever."

"Oh, come on," Heather muttered. "What could possibly more diabolical than what you pulled a couple weeks back? You know, that 'Torture Chamber of Love' crap."

"This one," Chris said gleefully. "A MASH-UP COMPETITION!"

Every female in the audience started squealing in delight. The males merely laughed. On the stage, almost all of the girls blanched at what they were going to end up doing. The exceptions being Izzy, Katie, Sadie, and Beth, who appeared very excited about it. Almost all the guys had brows raised in confusion. The exception being Trent, who groaned.

"Okay, spit it out," Duncan said to Trent. "What's Chris making us do?"

Trent sighed and took a good look at the other boys. "We're singing," he answered.

The guys were now groaning, as though they were suffering horribly. Ezekiel began shaking with fear, knowing that he didn't have a very good singing voice. Duncan slammed his fist hard against the nearest wall he could find.

"That's right," Chris laughed. "Every single one of you is going to be singing tonight. It'll just be a question of who will sing lead and who will sing back-up. But first, a rundown of the concept that is 'Mash-Up,' to those who have no idea what we're talking about. To explain the backbone of tonight's competition, here is our lovely Resident Assistant, Jessica."

"A mash-up is not as complex as it sounds," Jessica began to explain. "It's essentially a composition consisting of at least two songs, generally with the vocals of one overlaying the music of the other. It's just a matter of whether the songs being mashed together will work in unity as best as possible."

"As it relates to tonight's challenge, each song will require two leads and the rest at back-up," Chris added. "But before we determine who will be the leads and who will be the back-ups for each group, we have something special planned later tonight for Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna. So you can't choose any of them to be leads."

As the audience voiced their sorrow at this announcement, the four students named nervously looked at one another. Wondering if their not being leads was whether or not a good thing.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Harold - "Now that all this election stuff is over and Courtney and I called a truce, I can move on to something more important." /_Lets out a heavy sigh._/ "My relationship with LeShawna."

LeShawna - "We spent so much time fightin' with Courtney and Duncan, we almost forgot that we had a relationship that was barely goin' any where. I just hope there's still enough legs to get movin'." /_Looks around the room._/ "You know, this place could use a water cooler. People do get thirsty doin' this stuff, you know."

Bridgette - /_Pours water into a cup from the newly installed water cooler._/ "Can you believe that Duncan gave Courtney a raccoon for a pet? A raccoon! And she accepted it. Or her. Any way, the best part is that you could totally tell that they were making out last night as a result of it. They probably went all the way, too." /_Pauses, takes a drink of water, and starts to blush._/ "I wonder if Geoff would be willing to get me a dolphin for a pet..."

Courtney - "I have reason to believe that while Duncan and I were... engaged... in some... intense... activity last night, the camera was still rolling for a little bit. I want to point out that we did not go all the way. I am serious! We did not have sex!" /_Eyes shot wide open and lips started to tremble._/

Duncan - /_Leans back in the chair, feet up on the make-up cabinet._/ "Okay, so Princess still wouldn't let me take her all the way. I was hoping we would when she took her bra off faster than I could even register that she was kissing me. But the panties managed to stay on in-spite of my best moves. Man, that girl is tough to break. But that's why I love her." /_Chuckles and takes a drink of water._/ "Now, how to get her out of her panties..."

* * *

"But we can find out who will be the leads for the boys," Chris announced suddenly. "DJ, step on up!"

As the audience cheered, the guys were not entirely thrilled to hear DJ getting called out. They had a very good idea of where this was going and they groaned with displeasure. With the exception of Justin, who managed to form a gleeful smirk while DJ slowly made his way to the center of the stage.

"It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that, being last week's looo-ser, DJ will be at a disadvantage tonight," Chris continued. "And that disadvantage is that he will have no choice but to be a lead." DJ sulked, not really paying attention to the cheers and applauds he was getting from the audience. Although he managed to smile a little upon seeing Janet applaud for him rather happily. "And to really make these boys suffer, they won't get to choose who the other lead will be either. Eva, please step up."

The boys continued to groan as Eva confidently walked up to the center of the stage. She crossed her arms and glanced over at DJ, who in turn flinched and tried to desperately cover himself.

"Being last week's winner, Eva will get to decide which of the boys will be joining DJ as lead through a spin of the ever popular... Random Loser Generator!" Chris announced.

The audience cheered as Chef, sans sparkling dress, pushed the giant wheel out onto the stage. The wheel had the faces of all the boys except for DJ, Duncan, and Harold. Wanting to get it over with, Eva immediately spun the wheel. The boys watched nervously as the wheel kept spinning until it finally slowed to a stop. The result only dampened their spirits even further.

"Oh-ho-ho!" Chris laughed. "Man, do I love this show! Joining DJ as lead will be none other than Ezekiel!"

Ezekiel turned entirely white, eyes shot wide open, and frozen perfectly still while the audience let out a mixture of cheering, cat-calls, and a few heckling here and there. Of the latter group, Izzy immediately growled at. Or rather, to the ones she could figure from the crowd to be hecklers.

"The girls will get to decide amongst themselves which two will be leads," Chris stated. "Even better is that they get to make that call after Eva chooses the songs both groups will be performing." The handsome host holds up ten lyric sheets in both hands. "Eva, you have thirty seconds to decide upon two songs for the girls and two songs for the boys. Your thirty seconds start now."

Eva leaned forward and took a good look at the titles of the ten songs for her to choose from. Believing that she had plenty of time, she took a chance as scanning a few of the lyrics. With a smirk on her face, she picked out four sheets, two for each hand, with a few seconds left to spare.

"These ones for the boys," she said, waving the sheets in her left hand. "These ones for the girls." She waved the sheets in her right hand before handing the sheets for the boys to Chris and turning back to join the rest of the girls.

"Well, this will definitely be a fun one," Chris chuckled as he handed the sheets over to DJ. "Our groups will have five minutes to learn and memorize the songs before coming out here to perform. It will be boys first than the girls. SBS here will be performing the music and we have some props and costumes for the students to wear. In the meantime, our audience will be waiting by watching some more hilarious highlights from Total Drama Island."

* * *

**(The Boys)**

"What the hell kind of songs are these?" Duncan complained, looking over the lyrics to the songs the boys had to sing. "More importantly, who the hell picked these to be considered for us to sing?"

"Dudes, I'm feeling very weird just reading the words," Geoff added.

"It's probably why Eva is having us sing it in the first place," Harold noted. "I mean, gosh. Even if we sang perfectly, I really don't think the audience would approve all that much."

"I'm sure the sentiment is shared by just about every other male in this room when I say that we were doomed from the start," Noah stated. "We were just not meant to be musically inclined, save for Trent of course."

"Aww, come on guys," Owen said. "This could be a lotta fun!"

"Fun for any one in a mental asylum," Tyler retorted.

"I'm worried about what the audience is gonna think about the lyrics we're singing," Cody said.

"Perhaps our leads will do a good job singing that they'll forget about the lyrics and enjoy the song," Justin stated. No one caught the condescending tone in his voice.

"I'm tellin' you, man," DJ whimpered. "I'm not really comfortable singin' this. Not one bit."

"H'oo d'oo y'oo think I feel, eh," Ezekiel retorted with an even more pitiful whimper.

"Look, guys, we don't have much of a choice, okay?" Trent tried to reason. "Let's just get through this so we can survive tonight as quickly as possible. Alright? Now, from the top."

"Duncan, Harold," came the sudden voice of Jessica. "Need the both of you over here, pronto." As Trent continued to coach DJ and Ezekiel in learning the songs, Duncan and Harold shrugged before making their way over to their Resident Assistant. "If the both of you weren't afraid before about Chris saying he had something planned for you tonight, I have a feeling you will very shortly." She then handed them lyric sheets before returning and leaving them alone.

Duncan sighed. "Alright, let's see what McCrapzilla wants us to do," he muttered. Then he took a good look at the sheet and groaned again. "This cannot be happening."

"I should have known," Harold sighed. "It's never going to end, is it?"

"Somehow, I really can't be surprised any more," Duncan stated.

* * *

**(The Girls)**

"I'm actually not sure if these choices are going to be good or bad," Beth noted. "Because if we really wanna make this work, we would need to hit these performances out of the park."

"Well, I guess that means we can strike you as a candidate for one of the leads, pig girl," Heather commented. She gleefully ignored the glare she was receiving from Beth.

"Oh, and I suppose you're any better yourself?" Gwen questioned. "Last I heard, you were as musically talented as William Hung."

"Guys, can we just focus for a minute here?" Bridgette nearly begged. "Let's just pick the two best singers and get going with the rehearsals. Just because Eva picked obviously better songs for than the ones she picked for the guys doesn't mean we're a shoe-in to win this challenge. Since Courtney and LeShawna are out, who else can we consider?"

"Ohmygosh," Katie said suddenly. "Bridgette, you would, like, so be great to sing this song."

"Like, totally," Sadie added. "You were so great when we, like, did that musical challenge."

"You guys really think so?" Bridgette asked sheepishly. The wanna-be twins nodded very rapidly. "Well... I guess I can sing that one. So who would be the other lead?"

"Oh, oh," Sadie said. "Like, how about Lindsay?"

"Lindsiot?" Heather questioned. "She has no talent outside of making her breasts bounce."

"Lindsay is, like, such a good singer," Katie tried to reason. "Sadie and I have, like, heard her sing a couple times and she's, like, so musically talented. She could, like, sing the other song." Bridgette and Gwen looked at one another and shrugged at the thought. Heather scoffed at first than rolled her eyes.

"Fine with me," Eva snorted. "As long as I ain't singing."

"I'm gonna be singing!" Lindsay squealed. Seconds later, she was joined by Beth, Katie, and Sadie in the squealing while most of the others flinched or covered their ears aggressively.

"I didn't know we could use dogs for this performance," Izzy said. "That's a great idea!" She then started to howl along with the squealing that was being heard. But then all of that came to an abrupt stop.

"Is this some sort of a joke?" sounded the familiar shriek of Courtney. The girls all turned to see Jessica hand Courtney and LeShawna sheets of paper. The latter two not looking all that pleased with what was on them.

"I'm afraid not," Jessica replied. "Though I honestly believe that you shouldn't be so surprised. This is Chris we're talking about." The Resident Assistant turned and walked away.

"I can't believe I signed up for this," LeShawna sighed.

* * *

"I'll have you know that the bear was recently on location in America shooting a movie with Hugh Grant and Sarah Jessica Parker," Chris noted. "Heard he got a good paycheck for that. But I digress. The five minutes is up and it's time for our boys and girls to do some singing! First up is the boys with DJ and Ezekiel in lead. Take it away, boys!"

Chris stepped off the stage as a chalkboard was rolled out onto the center. All eleven boys came out, dressed as though they were teachers. The sight of this resulted in a few cat-calls from various females in the audience. It was then that SBS started to play the composition.

* * *

**Ezekiel:**  
Y'oong teacher, the s'oobject,  
'oof s'koolgirl fant'o'sy,  
She wants him, s'oo badly,  
Kn'oos what she wants t'oo be,  
With all the charms 'oof a w'ooman,_  
(Chorus: Ooo!)_  
Y'oo've kept the secret 'oof y'oor y'ooth,_  
(Chorus: Ahh!)_  
B'ook markin' - she's s'oo cl'oos n'oo,  
This girl is half his age.

**DJ and Chorus:**  
Don't stand,  
Don't stand so,  
Don't stand so close to me.

**DJ:**  
Young girl, you're out of your mind,_  
(Chorus: Ooo!)_  
Your love for me is way out of line,_  
(Chorus: Ahh!)_  
Better run girl, you're much too young girl._  
(Chorus: Run girl, young girl.)_

**Ezekiel:**  
Temptat'oon, frustrat'oon,  
S'oo bad it makes him cry,  
Beneath y'oor perf'oome and make-up,_  
(Chorus: Ooo!)_  
Y'oo're just a baby in disguise._  
(Chorus: Ahh!)_

**DJ:**  
Get out of here,  
Before you have the time,_  
(Chorus: Have the time.)_  
To change your mind,_  
(Chorus: Change your mind.)_  
'Cause I'm afraid you'll go too far._  
(Chorus: Ahh!)_

**DJ and Chorus:**  
Don't stand,  
Don't stand so,  
Don't stand so close to me.  
Don't stand,  
Don't stand so,  
Don't stand so close to me.

**DJ:**  
Young girl, you're out of your mind,_  
(Chorus: Ooo!)_  
Your love for me is way out of line,_  
(Chorus: Ahh!)_  
Better run girl, you're much too young girl._  
(Chorus: Run girl, young girl.)_

**DJ and Chorus:**  
Don't stand,  
Don't stand so,  
Don't stand so close to me.

**Ezekiel:**  
Y'oo're m'ooch t'oo y'oong girl._  
(Chorus: Don't stand,  
Don't stand so,  
Don't stand so close to me.)_

**DJ:**  
You're much too young girl.

* * *

There was a moment of silence before the audience began to applaud. There were a few cheers, but it was mostly clapping. Awkward clapping. The boys knew they were dealt with a raw deal as they shuffled slowly off the stage.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Water Cooler)**

Harold - "Dang. That was brutal."

Geoff - "That was so harsh, man."

Cody - "At least we tried out best,"

Noah - "Obviously, our best didn't cut it."

Owen - "I thought it was a lotta fun."

Tyler - "That was definitely not fun."

Justin - /_Smirks._/ "Well, at least I wasn't a lead."

DJ - /_Whimpers._/ "What's my mama gonna say when she sees this?"

Trent - /_Shrugs._/ "Could have been better, could have been worse."

Ezekiel - /_Shutters._/ "I've never been s'oo scared ab'oot anythin', eh."

Duncan - /_Sighs._/ "And the nightmare continues."

* * *

"Interesting composition you guys had," Chris chuckled. "Be sure to give my thanks to Eva when you see her. Oh wait, that's not necessary. She's coming out now with the rest of the girls for their composition. And it appears that the leads for this performance will be Bridgette and Lindsay."

The girls made their way to the center of the stage. Their costumes causing every male in the audience to howl. A pair of cloud shaped platforms were rolled out onto the stage to go along with the angel costumes the girls were wearing. Geoff and Tyler both had a difficult time keeping their eyes from going any wider as well as prevent drool from slipping out of their open mouths. To say their respective girlfriends were the very definition of their appearances would be an understatement. After many moments of the males simply staring, SBS began to play the composition.

* * *

**Bridgette:**  
Oh!  
Remember those walls I built,  
Well baby they're tumbling down,  
They didn't even put up a fight,  
They didn't even make a sound,  
It's like I've been awakened,  
Every rule I had you breaking,  
It's the risk that I'm taking,  
I ain't never gonna shut you out.

**Bridgette and Chorus 1:**  
Everywhere I'm looking now,  
I'm surrounded by your embrace,  
Baby I can see your halo,  
You know you're my saving grace,  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Walking on sunshine.)  
You're everything I need and more,  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Whoa oh!)  
It's written all over your face,  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Walking on sunshine.)  
Baby I can feel your halo.  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Whoa oh oh!)

**Lindsay and Chorus 2:**  
And don't it feel good!

_Chorus 1:  
I can feel your halo, halo,_  
(**Bridgette:** Halo!)_  
I can see your halo, halo,_  
(**Bridgette:** Halo!)_  
I can feel your halo, halo,_  
(**Bridgette:** Halo!)  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Walking on sunshine.)_  
I can see your halo, halo._  
(**Bridgette:** Halo!)  
(**Lindsay and Chorus 2:** Whoa oh!)

**Bridgette and Chorus:**  
And don't it feel good!

**Lindsay:**  
I used to think maybe you loved me, now baby I'm sure,  
And I just can't wait till the day when you knock on my door,  
Oh now now!

**Lindsay and Chorus 2:**  
I'm walking on sunshine, whoa oh!  
I'm walking on sunshine, whoa oh!  
I'm walking on sunshine, whoa oh oh!  
And don't it feel good!

_Chorus:  
I can feel your halo, halo,_  
(**Bridgette:** Halo!)  
(**Lindsay:** Hey, alright now!)_  
I can feel your halo, halo,  
I can see your,_  
(**Bridgette:** Hey, oh yeah!)_  
I can feel your halo, halo,_  
(**Lindsay:** Hey, Halo!)_  
I can feel your halo, halo,_  
(**Bridgette:** Hey!)_  
I can see your halo, halo._  
(**Lindsay:** Halo!)

**Bridgette:**  
I can see your halo,  
Halo!

* * *

Once Bridgette had completed her high note, the audience roared with cheering and applauding that made it clear they liked the performance. Among them was Janet, who was smiling and clapping with glee. The girls wearing angel costumes certainly helped bolster the spectacle of the performance, as did the dancing. Lindsay started to hop with excitement, soaking in the love she was feeling. Bridgette merely flushed in a bashful manner before the girls finally decided to exit the stage.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - "That was so much fun!"

LeShawna - "I'm impressed we managed to pull all that dancin' off with five minutes practice."

Katie - "Ohmygosh, that was, like, so a good idea to do all that dancing."  
Sadie - "It was, like, a dream come true!" /_Both girls start to squeal._/

Gwen - "I'll give Sadie this much. She can inspire others how to dance a good routine real quick."

Heather - "Who cares if we did a stupid dance routine. It better have won us the challenge."

Eva - "Oh, I'm sure the audience is going to have a hard time choosing which performance they liked."

Lindsay - "They liked our singing! They really liked our singing!"

Courtney - "That last note Bridgette hit was amazing. I didn't know she had it in her."

Bridgette - /_Blushes and fans herself._/ "I didn't know I had it in me to hit that high note, either."

Izzy - /_Still wearing the angel costume._/ "Every time Bridgette and Lindsay sing, an angel gets its wings!" /_Looks over her shoulder._/ "Oh look, I got wings!"

* * *

"How about that?" Chris announced, resulting in another round of cheering and applauding from the crowd. "Who would have thought that these kids could sing such sweet music without so much as a clue as to what they're tormenting themselves for. Janet, what did you think of the performances?"

"I thought they were all so talented," Janet replied. She barely had a moment to open her mouth and speak some more before she was cut off by the handsome host.

"Then let's see if they can turn it up a notch!" Chris announced. "Because we're going to have them go through another round of performances!" The audience cheered to this while the twenty-two students groaned with great displeasure. "Most everything remain the same, with a few modifications. The girls will be going first this time, but as compensation the boys won't know which songs their singing as well as who their other lead will be until the girls begin their performance."

"Oh sure!" Duncan stated, throwing his arms up in the air. "Just give this challenge to the girls why don't you. They'll have Malibu and Her Hotness upstage again." He felt a slight jab to his arm and found that it came from a glaring Tyler.

"Not quite," Chris said. "Can't have the same leads in this round as in the last. Save for DJ, of course." Most of the boys grumbled while DJ sighed and hung his head. "Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna are still not eligible for leads since we got something special in store for them."

"You are an evil man, Chris McLean!" Courtney proclaimed.

"Thank you," Chris chuckled. "So let's get Eva back up here to pick the songs to be mashed from the remaining six sheets. Oh, did I mention that you don't have thirty seconds to decide this time? You have five seconds."

"What?" Eva yelled. "That's barely enough time to scan the titles!"

"Five seconds start now," Chris said.

Eva quickly tried to read the titles of the six lyric sheets in Chris' hands. Having no time to really decide, she gave up and grabbed two sheets on one end and two sheets on the other end. She gave Chris the two in her right hand and returned to the girls with the two in her left hand.

"This should be lots of fun," Chris chuckled. "So, we're gonna take five while they prepare. In the meantime, we'll be showing more highlights of Total Drama Island for our wonderful audience. After that, Eva will take another spin of the Random Loser Generator to decide who the other lead for the boys before the girls perform. Then the boys will perform."

* * *

**(The Girls)**

"Suddenly, I'm glad I'm not eligible to be a lead," Courtney said as she looked at the two songs they were to perform.

"I wouldn't have mind performing that one, though," LeShawna noted.

"So, who's going to be the leads then?" Bridgette asked. "It can't be myself, Courtney, LeShawna, or Lindsay."

"That leaves Greta, Hanna, Belle, Ava, Kelly, Sonny, and Ivy," Lindsay pointed out. She did not take notice of the looks she was receiving from the other girls.

"I'm not singing lead, and that's final," Eva stated.

"I'll, like, be lead only if Sadie is so the other," Katie said.

"But that one song is, like, so weird," Sadie noted. "I, like, wouldn't want to be lead on that."

"With enough practice, maybe I can be lead on this one," Beth suggested.

"This is absolutely ridicules!" Heather hissed. "Chris eliminates our best options, leaving us with weird goth girl, the psycho hose beast, and tone deaf pig girl!"

Beth was about ready to march over and confront Heather, but Gwen stopped her and shook her head. "That's a shame," the goth girl said to Heather. "Because the potential success of this challenge not rests in you having to rely on weird goth girl, the psycho hose beast, and Beth."

Heather glared at Gwen for a moment then scoffed. "Fine!" she yelled. "I'll be lead. But only for that one. I'm not stupid enough to even think about allow you to make me lead on the other."

"So who is going to be lead on the other one then?" Courtney asked. All the girls looked at each other. And then they turned their attention to the one girl who could possibly not mind.

"Hey guys, guess who I am," Izzy said. She was still wearing the angel costume when she put on a particular wig. She then imitates a particular voice when she spoke. "When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the icebox!"

* * *

**(The Boys)**

"Isn't this great, guys?" Owen cheered. "We get to perform again!"

"This bites," Duncan grumbled.

"What was the point in putting on the costumes any way?" Cody asked curiously.

"Probably so we could get out lead comfortable," Justin commented.

"Dude, I am so not comfortable with this," DJ continued to whimper.

"We got'cha, man," Tyler sighed. "You've said that twenty times now."

"I think he's going to keep going until it's time for us to sing," Harold noted.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Noah stated sarcastically.

"Why d'oos Chris want me t'oo keep singin', eh?" Ezekiel squeaked.

"Come on, lil' dude," Geoff said, trying to be comforting. "At least you don't get to be lead again, bra."

"Just hang in there guys," Trent said, straightening the jacket portion of the costume. "Things are bound to look up for us. Who knows, maybe we'll get lucky with some songs that will definitely rock the house."

"Somehow, I'm doubting it," Duncan muttered.

* * *

"I can assure you that a Woolly Beaver can, in fact, eat things beside wood, climb, swim through tar, and be used as one helluva 'dam' fine hat," Chris noted. "Just as long as you have the neck strength. But any way, the five minutes is up and it's time for our boys and girls to be before. First, we need to figure out who will be joining DJ as lead for the boys. Eva?"

Eva walked out the same time the Random Loser Generator was rolled out. She came up to the wheel and spun it before turning and exiting off the stage. Duncan watched as the wheel kept spinning until it started to slow down. Seeing that it would stop on a face that would make their performance harder than it already was, he quietly and swiftly kicked a pebble at the wheel. This resulted in the wheel moving an extra click, making the arrow not point at Noah.

"Well, well, well," Chris chuckled. "Looks like the boys might have a shot after all. Joining DJ as a fellow lead in this round is the music man himself, Trent!" The audience cheered, particularly the females, while the boys let out a collective sigh of relief. Trent was then handed the lyric sheets for the two songs they were to perform. "With that out of the way, let's get to some singing. The girls will go first with the leads being Heather and Izzy!"

A section of male fans began chanting Izzy's name out of sync as the girls made their way to the center of the stage. They were all wearing shining and sparkling street clothes with half of them wearing a number of long wigs. Heather was not among the latter. With everything set, SBS began to play the composition.

* * *

**Izzy:**  
Yes!  
So crazy right now!  
Most incredibly!  
It's your girl, Izzy!  
It's your girl, Heather!

**Heather:**  
You ready?  
Hey!

_Chorus:  
A oh a oh a oh a no no,  
A oh a oh a oh a no no._

**Heather:**  
I look and stare so deep in your eyes,  
I touch on you more and more every time,  
When you leave I'm begging you not to go,  
Call your name two, three times in a row.

**Izzy:**  
I'm hairy high and low,  
Don't ask me why, I don't know,  
Whoa oh oh!

**Heather and Chorus 1:**  
Got me looking so crazy right now,  
Your love's got me looking so crazy right now,_  
(Chorus 2: Your love.)_  
Got me looking so crazy right now,  
Your touch's got me looking so crazy right now._  
(Chorus 2: Got me so crazy right now.)_

**Izzy:**  
Just give me your head with hair,  
Long beautiful hair.

**Izzy and Chorus 2:**  
Shining, gleaming,  
Streaming, flaxen, waxen.  
(**Heather:** Oh!)

**Heather and Chorus 1:**  
Got me hoping you'll page me right now,  
Your kiss got me hoping you'll save me right now,  
Looking so crazy your love's got me looking,  
Got me looking so crazy your love.  
(**Izzy and Chorus 2:** My hair's going crazy right now!)

_Chorus 1:  
Got me looking so crazy right now,  
Your love's got me looking so crazy right now,_  
(**Heather:** Hey!)_  
(Chorus 2: Your love.)  
Got me looking so crazy right now,  
Your touch's got me looking so crazy right now._  
(**Heather:** Your love.)

**Izzy and Chorus 2:**  
Down to here,  
Down to there,  
Down to there,  
Down to where it stops by itself,  
Where it stops by itself.  
(**Heather:** Oh!)

_Chorus:  
Got me looking so crazy right now,_  
(**Izzy:** So crazy.)_  
Your love's got me looking so crazy right now,_  
(**Izzy:** Oh!)  
(**Heather:** Hey!)_  
Got me looking so crazy right now,_  
(**Heather:** Yeah!)_  
Your touch got me looking so crazy right now._

**Heather:**  
My hair's going crazy right now!

* * *

Heather gasped in horror upon realizing the line she had ended the song with. The audience started to lightly laugh while seemingly applauding with approval. Izzy blew kisses out to the male fans still chanting her name out of sync before the girls made their exit off the stage.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Fumes._/ "That was absolutely humiliating!"

Gwen - /_Laughs._/ "That was absolutely hilarious!"

LeShawna - "I dunno about y'all, but that was a strange one."

Eva - "Just another reason why I don't sing."

Lindsay - "I don't get it. What was Itchy singing about again?"

Katie - /_Still wearing her wig._/ "Do you think I, like, look okay with this wig on?"  
Sadie - /_Also wearing her wig._/ "You, like, look so much better than I do with this wig."

Beth - "It wasn't all that bad."

Bridgette - "It was funny in a good way."

Courtney - "Well, at least we performed strong enough with the first song that this shouldn't count against us."

Izzy - /_Still wearing her wig, singing._/ "Gliddy gloop gloopy, Nibby nobby nooby, La la la lo lo. Sabba sibby sabba, Nooby abba dabba, Le le lo lo. Dooby ooby walla, dooby abba dabba, Early morning singing song."

* * *

"That was quite a performance the girls did there," Chris chuckled. "But let's see how the boys do with no time to prepare."

Ten of the boys quickly made their way out and took positions at the center of the stage. A few girls in the audience began squealing at the sight of the boys dressed up like greasers. Almost suddenly, Trent slid onto the stage. In hand was a guitar. He quickly pointed at SBS and then started the composition by playing the guitar. Gwen watched this with a grin forming on her lips.

* * *

**Trent:**  
This ain't a song for the broken-hearted,  
No silent prayer for the faith-departed,  
And I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd,  
You're gonna hear my voice when I shout it out loud.

**Trent and Chorus 1:**  
It's my life!

**Trent:**  
It's now or never,_  
(Chorus 1: Ahh!)_  
I ain't gonna live forever,_  
(Chorus 1: Live forever!)_  
I just wanna live while I'm alive._  
(Chorus 1: Ohh!)_

**Trent and Chorus 1:**  
It's.  
My.  
Life!

_Chorus 2:  
These are my confessions._

**DJ:**  
Just when I thought I said all I could say,  
My chick on the side said she got one on the way.

_Chorus 2:  
These are my confessions._

**DJ:**  
If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all,_  
(Chorus 2: All!)_  
I damn near cried when I got that phone call,_  
(Chorus 2: Ahh!)_  
I'm so throwed,_  
(Chorus 2: Ooo!)_  
I don't know what to do,_  
(Chorus 2: Know what to do.)_  
But to give part two of my..._  
(Chorus 2: Part two of my...)_

_Chorus 2:  
Confessions._

**Trent:**  
Better stand tall when they're calling you out.

**All:**  
Don't bend, don't break,  
Baby don't back down.

**DJ and Chorus 2:**  
These are my confessions.

**Trent:**  
It's now or never,_  
(Chorus 1: Ahh!)_  
I ain't gonna live forever,_  
(Chorus 1: Live forever!)  
_(**DJ and Chorus 2:** These are my confessions.)  
I just wanna live while I'm alive._  
(Chorus 1: Ohh!)_

_Chorus 1:  
It's my life._

**DJ:**  
Just when I thought I said all I could say,_  
(Chorus 1: Ahh!)_  
My chick on the side said she got one on the way.

_Chorus 2:  
These are my confessions._

**Trent:**  
I just wanna live while I'm alive._  
(Chorus 1: Ohh!)_

**All:**  
It's.  
My.  
Life!

* * *

When the music ended, the Marshmallow exploded with female cheering and squealing. While the males merely applauded with approval, the females were losing their minds with a desire to create a sound that expressed just how overloaded their hormones became. Even Janet was screaming and applauding. As were most of the girls off of the stage.

"Hubba hubba hubba!" Izzy hollered and then whistled.

Katie, Sadie, Lindsay, and Beth were squealing at the top of their lungs. Bridgette was clapping with a great deal of excitement. LeShawna had a huge smile on her face. Courtney had dropped her jaw in utter shock. Heather scoffed and turned her head away. Eva was buried in a self-imposed face palm. Gwen merely grinned.

"Your boyfriend is a goddamned show off," Eva muttered to the goth girl.

"Tell me something I don't know," Gwen responded. There was a slight hint of a giggle in her voice.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie - /_Squeals._/ "Ohmygosh, that was, like, so hot!"  
Sadie - /_Also squeals._/ "I know, right? There was, like, so much man candy on that stage." /_Both start squealing again when a third person suddenly pops up from behind and pulls them in for a group hug._/  
Izzy - "Delicious man meat! Hot, handsome, savory meat straight from a butcher's block!"  
Katie - "Ohmygosh, she's, like, so right!"  
Sadie - "They're not just hot. They're, like, handsome and savory, too!" /_Katie and Sadie squeal while Izzy cackles._/

Beth - "DJ was really good in that second performance. It was like he was singing his heart out."

Bridgette - "That was quite a show stopper DJ did. And he managed to do so with Trent owning it on guitar."

Courtney - "Not fair! I bet the only reason they were screaming their heads off was simply because Trent was playing his fancy guitar. I bet everyone out there would have been going wild if one of us girls was playing an instrument during one of our performances." /_Pauses and thinks for a moment._/ "Although I must admit... I highly doubt any one of those songs would've been suitable to play a violin to..."

Eva - /_Snorts._/ "... The good ones just had to be taken..."

Gwen - /_Giggles uncharacteristically._/ "Oh, Trent. Must you steal my heart by going out there, looking all yummy wearing a leather jacket, and rockin' the house with your guitar playing? You make it so difficult for me to get back at you in spades."

* * *

Chris tried to speak, but stopped as he found that the female screaming was deafening. He waited for a moment for them to calm down. Then he waited some more. Then for several moments. But the screams kept on going. And going. And going. The handsome host finally had had enough and pressed a button, resulting in a giant "SHUT UP!" to appear on the screen. The screaming slowly began to die down until it was quiet enough for him to speak.

"Sheesh," Chris said. "Teenagers and their hormones. Now before we close this sucker out, it's time we do something a little special. As most of you are well aware, Courtney and Harold ran against each other for a spot in the student council. Courtney got in, Harold didn't. What you probably haven't heard is that last night they called a truce. Made peace with one another. End of fighting. For now, at least. Any way, we at Total Drama thought it would be fun to get once last chance to milk their rivalry. In a more peaceful manner. So Harold and LeShawna followed by Courtney and Duncan will be performing duets for us all!"

The audience began to cheer, in particular the females. Even Janet was cheering joyfully. The students took at good look at Courtney, Duncan, Harold, and LeShawna with raised brows. The four soon-to-be singers merely sighed and stepped over to their positions. Harold and LeShawna at center stage, Courtney and Duncan waiting in the wings.

"Hang on a second, music man," Chris said to Trent, grabbing him before he could walk off stage. "I could technically dock the boys because you played a guitar in a competition that's specifically for singing."

"But then you never mentioned we couldn't play instruments," Trent pointed out.

"Too true," Chris agreed with a nod. "However, I'm not letting you off the hook that easy. You like playing the guitar so much, you're gonna play it for both performances." He showed Trent the titles of the songs on a sheet of paper.

"I can do that," Trent said. He made his way over to join the band SBS, but stopped just after passing Harold and LeShawna. "Sing from the soul on this one, guys. Just may get this relationship of yours rolling in the right direction."

"Thanks," Harold and LeShawna said together. Upon realizing this, they nearly blushed and smiled shyly at one another. Trent chuckled and went over to the band.

"Since the rest of the competitors didn't know about this, back-up singing will be done by a local group here at Richmore," Chris announced. "Please welcome... The Dynasty!" The audience cheered as a rather large group of boys and girls appeared on stage behind the band. "So without further adieu... Harold and LeShawna!"

"You ready to make some music, my sugar baby?" LeShawna asked quietly with a smile.

"Of course, my chocolate peach," Harold replied quietly with a smile of his own.

* * *

**Harold:**  
Can...

_Chorus:  
Anybody,  
Find me,  
Somebody to,  
Love._

**LeShawna:**  
Oh!  
Each mornin' I get up I die a little,  
Can barely stand on my feet.

**Harold:**  
Take a look in the mirror and cry,_  
(Chorus: Take a look at yourself in the mirror.)_  
Lord, what you're doing to me._  
(Chorus: And cry, yeah-yeah.)_

**LeShawna:**  
I have spent all my years in believin' you._  
(Chorus: Believing you.)_

**LeShawna and Chorus:**  
But I just can't get no relief, Lord!

**Harold:**  
Somebody,_  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_  
Oh somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_

**All:**  
Can anybody find me...

**Harold:**  
Somebody to love?  
I work hard,_  
(Chorus: He works hard.)_  
Every day of my life.

**Harold and LeShawna:**  
I work till I ache in my bones.

**Harold:**  
At the end,_  
(Chorus: At the end of the day.)_  
I take home my hard earned pay all on my own._  
(Chorus: Gets home, does all on his own.)_

**LeShawna:**  
I get down on my knees and I start to pray,_  
(Chorus: Down, knees, praise the Lord!)_  
Till the tears run down my eyes, Lord!_  
(Chorus: Ooo, Lord!)_

**Harold:**  
Somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_

**Harold and LeShawna:**  
Oh, somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_

**All:**  
Can anybody fine me...

**LeShawna:**  
Somebody to love?  
Oh!

**Harold:**_  
(Chorus: He works hard.)_  
Well, everyday,_  
(Chorus: Everyday.)_  
I try and I try and I try._  
(Chorus: Try and try and try.)_

**LeShawna:**  
But everybody wants to put me down,  
They say I'm goin' crazy.

**Harold:**  
They say I got a lot of water in my brain,_  
(Chorus: Aaah.)_  
I got no common sense,  
I got nobody left to believe._  
(Chorus: He's got nobody left to believe.)_  
No!_  
(Chorus: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!)_

_Chorus:  
Ooo, Lord!_

**Harold:**  
Oh, somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_

**Harold and LeShawna:**  
Oh, somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody!)_

**All:**  
Can anybody find me...

**LeShawna:**  
Somebody to love?

_Chorus:  
Can,  
Anybody,  
Find me,  
Someone to love?_

**Harold:**  
Got no feel, I got no rhythm,  
I just keep losing my beat._  
(Chorus: You just keep losing your beat.)_

**LeShawna:**  
I'm ok, I'm alright,_  
(Chorus: Ok, she's alright.)_  
Ain't gonna face no defeat._  
(Chorus: She's alright, yeah yeah.)_

**Harold and LeShawna:**  
I just gotta get out of this prison cell.

**All:**  
Someday I'm gonna be free, Lord!

_Chorus:  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,_  
(**Harold:** Oh.)_  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,_  
(**LeShawna:** Hey.)_  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,_  
(**Harold:** Somebody.)_  
Love, love,  
Find me somebody to love,  
Find me somebody to love,_  
(**LeShawna:** Oh!)_  
Somebody,  
Somebody!  
Somebody,  
Somebody!_  
(**Harold:** Oh.)_  
Somebody,  
Somebody!_  
(**Harold:** Find me, find me.)_  
Somebody find me somebody to love._

**All:**  
Can anybody find me...

**LeShawna:**  
Somebody to,  
Love?!

_Chorus:  
Find me,_  
(**LeShawna:** Oh!)_  
Somebody,  
To love._  
(**LeShawna:** Somebody find me.)_  
Find me,_  
(**Harold:** Find me.)_  
Somebody,  
To love._  
(**LeShawna:** Somebody find me.)_  
Find me,  
Somebody,_  
(**LeShawna:** Somebody to love.)_  
To love._  
(**Harold:** Somebody.)_  
Find me,_  
(**Harold:** Somebody.)_  
Somebody,_  
(**Harold:** Somebody.)_  
To love._  
(**LeShawna:** Somebody to love.)_  
Find me,  
Somebody,_  
(**LeShawna:** Oh!)_  
To love.  
Find me,_  
(**LeShawna:** Somebody to love.)_  
Somebody,_  
(**Harold:** Somebody to love.)_  
To love._

**LeShawna:**  
Find me,_  
(Chorus: Find me.)_  
Somebody._  
(Chorus: Somebody.)_

**All:**  
To love!

* * *

The audience cheered wildly. Many even started a standing ovation. Harold and LeShawna apparently took no notice as they lost themselves in each other's eyes. They then drew in for a loving embrace to the delight of just about everyone watching. Even Courtney and Duncan couldn't help but smile at what they were seeing. Among the hidden few who did not seem to care was Heather, who simply turned her head away. The others were obviously members of the Dodekatheon. After releasing the embrace, Harold offered his arm and LeShawna gladly took it as he accompanied her off the stage.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Trent - "They took my advice and sang from the soul. And as a result, they made some of the most beautiful music tonight."

Gwen - "That performance only strengthened my resolve to do that double date idea. Trent and I need to get those two going forward with their relationship. It would be a crime for it to end just because they couldn't get it running."

Harold - /_Sighs lovingly._/ "LeShawna..."

LeShawna - /_Sighs in a dreamy tone._/ "My skinny lil' white boy..."

* * *

"Aww, what was sweet little moment that was," Chris stated. "And boy did they really give it their all. Kinda makes one wish that performance was eligible for consideration in determining who wins tonight. But alas, it was never meant to be. Any way, let's see if our final duet tonight can be just as good. Boys and girls... Courtney and Duncan."

The audience cheered, in particular the females. Courtney and Duncan made their way to the center of the stage and then positioned themselves at where they wanted to be. They gave one another nervous glances and then took deep breaths.

* * *

_Girls Chorus:  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Duncan:**  
Just a small town girl,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
Livin' in a lonely world,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_  
She took the midnight train goin' anywhere._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Courtney:**  
Just a city boy,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
Born and raised in south Detroit,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_  
He took the midnight train goin' anywhere._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

_Girls Chorus:  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

_Chorus:  
Cha-da!_

**Duncan:**  
A singer in a smoky room._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_

**Courtney:**  
A smell of wine and cheap perfume._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Duncan and Courtney:**  
For a smile they can share the night,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
It goes on and on and on and on.  
Strangers waiting,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Up and down the boulevard,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Their shadows searching in the night,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum, Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Streetlight, people,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Livin' just to find emotion,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Hiding, somewhere in the night._  
(Chorus: Ahh, Ahh, Cha-ja, Cha-ja-da!)_

_Girls Chorus:  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Courtney:**  
Workin' hard to get my fill,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
Everybody wants a thrill._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Duncan and Courtney:**  
Payin' anything to roll the dice,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
Just one more time._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**Courtney:**  
Some will win._  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum.)_

**Duncan and Courtney:**  
Some will lose,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum.)_  
Some were born to sing the blues,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_  
And now the movie never ends,_  
(Girls Chorus: Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.)  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)_  
It goes on and on and on and on.  
Strangers waiting,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Up and down the boulevard,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Their shadows searching in the night,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum, Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Streetlight, people,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Livin' just to find emotion,_  
(Chorus: Da-Dum, Da-Dum.)_  
Hiding, somewhere in the night._  
(Chorus: Ahh, Ahh, Cha-ja, Cha-ja-da!)_

_Girls Chorus:  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da,  
(Boys Chorus: Dum, Da-da-dum, Da-da-dum.)  
Da-da-da-da, Da-da-da-da.  
(Boys Chorus: Da-da-dum, Da-da...)_

**All:**  
Don't stop believin'.

**Duncan and Courtney:**  
Hold on to that feelin'.

**All:**  
Streetlight, people!  
Don't stop believin'.

**Duncan and Courtney:**  
Hold on to that feelin'.

**All:**  
Streetlight, people!  
Don't stop!

* * *

The audience lost it, cheering their lungs out. In particular, all the females were screaming and squealing with great delight. Just about everyone on stage was smiling and applauding, including Harold and LeShawna. The performance had ended with Duncan holding Courtney very close. They were breathing a little heavy yet slowly, looking into one another's eyes. They were lost in their locked gaze for what seemed like hours. They were about to lean into one another when they were interrupted.

"Now that is how you end an awesome night of music!" Chris announced. He ignored Courtney and Duncan shooting him hard glances before they straightened themselves and joined their respective groups. "I'm sure our contestants would have no problem whatsoever to keep singing for each and every one of you for the rest of the night." The twenty-two students were vigorously waving their arms against the idea. "But unfortunately there are time constraints with the show, so we gotta get this over with. So we turn it over to our special judge of the evening. Janet, based on the two rounds of performances earlier, which group would you choose to be tonight's winners?"

"Oh dear..." Janet began to answer shyly. "They were all so good tonight... It's too hard to pick one over the other..." She nervously looked from one group to the other and then back again. "I think I'll pick... the boys."

The audience reacted vocally in shock and surprise. Even all the students on the stage were caught off guard. The girls couldn't believe that they lost. The boys couldn't believe that they won. As if overwhelmed by the whole experience, and for really no apparent reason, Ezekiel fainted. Heather growled furiously and storm off the stage.

"Guess that second performance of theirs was more than enough to give the first one a pass," Chris reasoned with a shrug. "So the boys win and the girls lose. We need an individual winner to load prizes on. So Janet, who amongst the boys was the best?"

"I have to choose one again?" Janet asked in quiet surprise. "Oh my..." She looked upon the boys, even the out cold Ezekiel who was being attended to by Bridgette and Geoff, with a finger pressed gently on her lip. Then she bashfully brought the finger over to the ponytail hanging over her shoulder to twirl some loose strands of hair. "Um... I think I'll go with... DJ... because he had to be the lead twice and did such a good job on the second song."

As the audience cheered, DJ was taken aback. He blinked once before smiling and sighing with relief. Most of the other boys, at those that were conscious, gave him pats on the back. The one exception was Justin, who unbeknownst to everyone else was burning holes in the back of DJ's head.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Justin - "What is it about DJ that she sees in him? He doesn't have the face, or the shoulders, or the abs, or most definitely not the butt that I have. Desperate times call for drastic measures. She will pick me over him. She will not deny me."

DJ - "That was awfully nice of Janet to pick me as the winner." /_Pauses and thinks for a moment._/ "I wonder if she... likes me..." /_Starts to blush at the thought._/

Chris - "We're running out of time and space on this sucker, so I'll just mention that we let the audience decide upon the looo-ser. They picked Heather mostly because she was being a poor sport at the end. That and she wasn't really giving her best in her performance until she sang that last line." /_Chuckles._/

Heather - /_Furious._/ "These pathetic morons can kiss my ass! You just wait and see. The Dodekatheon will only let stupidity slide for so long. Soon, and I'm hoping it's very soon, we will put these people in their places."

* * *

"Nice!" Chris chuckled. "DJ went from zero to hero just by singing. Well big guy, as this week's winner you will be the recipient of a 64 GB Apple iPad Tablet PC, plus a $500 gift card good towards downloading whatever the hell you want from iTunes."

"Gee, I wonder who the sponsor of tonight's challenge was," Noah muttered sarcastically.

"So that's it for tonight, everyone!" Chris announced. "Hope you had as much a good time as I did with the Mash-Up Challenge, brought to you by Apple. I'd like to thank SBS and The Dynasty for helping us out. Have a good night and we'll see you back here next week in The Marshmallow!"

* * *

**Boys Mash-Up 1**  
"Don't Stand So Close to Me" by The Police/"Young Girl" by Gary Puckett and the Union Gap  
Leads: DJ, Ezekiel  
Chorus: Cody, Duncan, Geoff, Harold, Justin, Noah, Owen, Trent, Tyler

**Girls Mash-Up 1**  
"Halo" by Beyoncé/"Walking on Sunshine" by Katrina and the Waves  
Leads: Bridgette, Lindsay  
Chorus 1: Courtney, Eva, Gwen, Heather, LeShawna  
Chorus 2: Beth, Izzy, Katie, Sadie

**Girls Mash-Up 2**  
"Crazy in Love" by Beyoncé featuring Jay-Z/"Hair" from the musical Hair  
Leads: Heather, Izzy  
Chorus 1: Beth, Bridgette, Courtney, LeShawna, Lindsay  
Chorus 2: Eva, Gwen, Katie, Sadie

**Boys Mash-Up 2**  
"It's My Life" by Bon Jovi/"Confessions Part II" by Usher  
Leads: Trent, DJ  
Chorus 1: Cody, Harold, Justin  
Chorus 2: Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Noah, Owen, Tyler

**Duet 1**  
"Somebody to Love" by Queen  
Performed by Harold and LeShawna

**Duet 2**  
"Don't Stop Believing" by Journey  
Performed by Courtney and Duncan

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Water Cooler

* * *

**Question:** Is Lord Akiyama a Gleek (aka _Glee_ fan)?

**Answer:** Yes. In a manner of speaking.

I just got started in watching the show after months of hesitation, but I've been addicted to some of the songs since November when my friend bought the first volume soundtrack and we listened to it in the car. Like practically most every other fan of the series, "Don't Stop Believing" got me hook, line, and sinker. When I heard the mash-up songs, that's when the idea of this challenge was conceived. But I didn't pull the trigger until I could get the elections story arc out of the way. Now that it's off my chest, I can work on other stuff for the story.

By the way, I highly recommend listening to the _Glee_ recordings when you're reading the lyrics. It's a great way to imagine the _Total Drama_ kids singing the songs themselves and being in sync with the rhythm.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

---

**Next Up:** Quarantine


	21. Week 7, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-One

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Previously on Total Drama Academy...

It was all about the elections the last week. Yours truly, the most qualified, most handsome host around, moderated the Vice Presidential Debate on Sunday night. It was our first real look at a girl who seemingly captivates with little effort. And I do mean little effort. Whatever it was, there was something about this Janet girl in which she just drew people. People like Justin and DJ, both of whom appear to have the biggest crush on her from our bunch. Justin has hardcore determination to win her heart, but DJ just might be miles ahead due his gentle nature that seems compatible to her sweetness. It boggles the mind how well liked this girl is because she's too nice, and niceness don't bring in the ratings. Although a potential a love triangle between them might.

While Janet was off winning the hearts of boys and winning the Vice Presidency without even trying, Courtney and Harold were vying for a spot on the student council. As instructed by the Dodekatheon, Heather pulled out some nasty tricks to undermine Courtney's chances. But a shocking, yet rousing final statement from Harold forced her to switch targets, recognizing that he would be a greater threat over Courtney. Her quick thinking secured her not only membership in the Dodekatheon, but also a seat amongst the elite. After claiming victory, Courtney called a truce with Harold and finally put to rest the ratings powerhouse that was their feud. Guess we'll have to find something else to milk.

Challenge Night saw our students tortured in one of the worst methods I could possibly imagine for them. Singing! To the delight of raging hormones that was our audience, they performed mash-ups of some catchy tunes. The girls seemed destined to take victory with Bridgette and Lindsay's quite angelic performance, but luck fell on the side of the boys and music man Trent blew the roof with DJ in a performance that drove every female in the Marshmallow wild and won the favor of special guest judge Janet. The night and our favorite rivalry came to a close with a pair of duet performances from Harold and LeShawna and then Courtney and Duncan that truly were definitive show stoppers. Seriously, why would these kids be so nervous about singing when they clearly know how to bring the house down?

There's plenty of fun yet to be had within the confines of Richmore Academy, and I plan to expose every delicious second of it.

Who will win Janet's affections?

How much more diabolical will Heather become now that she's in the Dodekatheon?

What was Duncan thinking giving Courtney a raccoon for a pet?

These questions and more may be answered in this episode of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 1 - Saturday)**

The clock had turned to exactly six in the morning when there was loud banging at the door. Katie and LeShawna immediately shot up in their beds, wondering at first if what they heard was accurate. When the banging continued, they moaned with great displeasure. LeShawna let out an angry sigh as she got out of bed.

"There betta be one damned good reason for wakin' me up this early on a Saturday!" she huffed.

She opened the door and there appeared an ominous figure. Just the mere sight of the towering shadow caused both girls to screaming in sheer horror. The figure then stood back a little so that light could be shine upon it's presence. It was one of the stage-hands from the Arena challenge who looked very much like Mr. Black. The girls still screamed in terror.

"Noah, save me!" Katie cried.

"My apologizes for a most inconvenient sleep deprivation," the figure stated in his droll tone. "You are to report immediately to the Riker Hall amphitheater, otherwise known as the Marshmallow. Non-compliance would be most unwise."

"Oh, just because you standin' there all spooky-like we're gonna do what you tell us to, is that it?" LeShawna stated sternly. "Well, my booty ain't goin' nowhere until someone tells me what the deal is."

"We're being quarantined," a familiar voice spoke from the hallway. Seconds later, Jessica popped into view with a clipboard in hand. "Apparently our humble Chef Hatchet caused something to spill in the building about an hour ago. Given that the substance is unknown, everyone in the building is at risk of possible infection. So we're moving all you kiddies into the Marshmallow."

"Yer frontin' me," LeShawna muttered in disbelief.

"Nope, I'm afraid not," Jessica responded, shaking her head. "I'd advise you gather up your homework and assignments in case our containment ends up lasting a good long while."

"Can we at least, like, change our clothes?" Katie asked with a whimper.

"Normally, I'd say yes," Jessica replied. Then she jerked her thumb at the stage-hand "But these guys here want to make sure you get into the Marshmallow pronto. So I'd stick with the homework and assignments, I'm afraid."

Just then, an explosion sounded suddenly from one of the neighboring rooms. Katie screamed and hid under her blanket while LeShawna flinched in horror. The stage-hand brought his hand up to his ear-piece, listening to a message being transmitted.

"It appears there has been a breach," he said in his droll tone. "A student seems to be not complying."

"I'm going to take one guess at who that might be," Jessica said. She was proven correct less than a second later.

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!" the all too familiar shriek of Izzy cried. She was then seen zooming through the hallway, emitting black smoke as she ran. Following behind were a pair of identical stage-hands chasing after her. The stage-hand standing next to Jessica soon joined in the pursuit.

"Maybe you two should gather your homework and assignments and then head over to the Marshmallow right away before the stage-hands lose their minds on account of chasing after Izzy," Jessica recommended.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Izzy - /Struggles_ with keeping a stage-hand from entering, starts hitting him with the Electric Fish before she successfully shuts the door on him._/ "Here's Un-Named Character, engaging in his profession. With a last name like 'Character,' you'd think his parents would have spared him the further indignity of a first name like 'Un-Named.' But as much as he hates to admit it, Un-Named Character knows his parents are complete boneheads. His parents, Main and Supporting, meant well, but to be blunt, those two just didn't have a brain between 'em. But all that's over now. Because Un-Named is changing his name, and he'll never have to deal with this crap ever again." /_The stage-hand tries to get back in, Izzy continues to beat on him with the Electric Fish until she is successfully captured and hoisted over the stage-hand's shoulder._/ "Now, if he could just figure out if he's going to change his last name to 'Assailant,' 'Accomplice,' or 'Antagonist,' he'd be in business!" /_Continues hitting the stage-hand on the back with the Electric Fish until he carries her out. The Electric Fish is then tossed back onto the hanging Z Necklace._/

* * *

Inside the Marshmallow, stage-hands were posted at every possible exit to prevent any one from entering or leaving. Jessica sat at the most furthest to the back on the floor level, reading one of many books she had stacked next to her. All twenty-two students, whether they liked it or not, were in their pajamas.

Katie and Lindsay snuggled up to their respective boyfriends Noah and Tyler, feeling as though doing so would keep them safe. Noah and Tyler grinned happily at their luck. Cody and Beth saw this and then bashfully made glances at one another. Sadie also watched, though more so at her would-be twin, and sighed lovingly. Geoff and Bridgette were, to no one's surprise, engaged in an intense game of tonsil hockey. Ezekiel sat quietly, twiddling his thumbs. He would occasionally make facial contortions, a result of his trying to stop picking his nose.

Izzy was wearing a military helmet. With both parrots perched on her shoulders, she laid out a map to Owen and was briefing him on plans to take out the stage-hands silently and efficiently. Owen had no idea what his crazy girlfriend was saying, but listened to her any way. The parrots would often respond whenever she asked them if they understood her, calling her General as they did. Heather sat alone, filing her nails in frustration at the situation that she found herself in. DJ also sat alone, petting Bunny gently every now and then. Justin sat a number of seats behind him, shooting holes through the back of the other's head. Eva sat elsewhere, lifting weights and grumbled silently as usual.

In the front, Harold and LeShawna were going over their respective homework and assignments. Gwen leaned up against Trent, who in turn was quietly strumming on a guitar. Duncan managed to wrap an arm around the shoulders of Courtney, who relented to his half-embrace while gently stroking Brittany, who sat on her lap looking quite confused with her surroundings. The sight of Courtney with a raccoon soon brought the attention of some of the others.

"I hafta ask again," LeShawna stated. "You got her for a pet a raccoon?"

"I'm gonna say it again," Duncan responded. "I couldn't leave campus to go to a pet shop. Brittany was the best I could come up with under the circumstances."

"Why would you name her Brittany any way?" Gwen asked with a raised brow.

"I don't think a pet should be belittled with such ridicules names like Scamper or Fluffy," Courtney replied in explanation. "They are beings, too, so should be treated as such."

"Princess, even I know that's a loada hippie crap you really don't believe in," Duncan stated. This resulted in a sharp elbow being jammed into his stomach. "Ah! That... hurt..."

"Okay, okay, so I just like the name," Courtney admitted. "Happy now?"

"Whatever," Gwen said with a shrug. "She's your pet. You can name her any name you want."

The Marshmallow became silent again for a long period of time. Save, of course, for Izzy's various attempts to take out the stage-hands with Owen's help. In one instance, they fired poison darts directly at the necks of the suited men. Although they couldn't find poison darts and therefore thought a good substitute was spit wads soaked in tobacco sauce. Owen ended up eating most of his as a result. The plan was abandoned when Izzy decided the sunglasses prevented hits from reaching the eyes. She also figured the sunglasses were the reason why her flashing them caused no reaction either. To her surprise, Owen flashing them also did not seem to have any affect on them.

In another attempt, Izzy and Owen launched what Izzy considered to be high explosive hand grenades. All they did was splatter various colors of paint on the stage-hands. Who in turn still made no reaction. Izzy then grabbed an unsuspecting Ezekiel and placed him in front of one imposing looking stage-hand. The thought being that the prairie boy would distract them, since his toque apparently had powers of cuteness, long enough for her to sneak up and take them out with a karate chop to the neck. Still not reaction whatsoever. Ezekiel, already scared at being grabbed by Izzy so suddenly, nervously smiled and scooted slowly away. Izzy figured it would have been a better idea to use the Vulcan nerve pinch, but now believed the stage-hands were on to her and must therefore come up with a new plan of action.

"What's Izzy doing, Noah-bear?" Katie asked curious while she was twirling a finger through Noah's hair.

"Looks to me like she's trying to get out of being contained in here," Noah answered, gently drawing repeated circles with a finger upon the small of Katie's back. "Although I really think she's just bored out of her skull and is doing this to please herself."

"But, like, why are Owen and Ezekiel with her then?" Katie questioned further.

"Owen's probably just happy to be apart of whatever it is Izzy's doing," Noah replied. "As for Ezekiel, it looks like he's being dragged into this against his will. Why, I don't know."

Izzy was later found skipping on the stage, a worried looking Ezekiel hoisted over her shoulder. Owen following along happily. They were apparently looking for something new to do in taking out the stage-hands when Owen seemed to have tripped over something. It seemed that the twenty-two students were not the only ones stuck in the Marshmallow.

"Dude," a voice moaned. "I think a hippo stepped on my leg."

"What's a hippo?" another voice moaned.

"My head hurts," a third voice moaned.

"My spleen hurts," a fourth voice moaned.

"Hey, it's my fraternity brothers!" Owen cheered.

"Who said that?" the first figure asked.

"Who said what?" the second figure asked.

"What?" the third figure asked.

"When?" the fourth figure asked.

"Where?" Owen asked.

"How'd you guys get in here?" Izzy asked in a rather excited tone. She still had Ezekiel over her shoulder.

"Huh?" the first figure asked.

"I don't remember being here," the second figure mused.

"Dude, when did we move our gear?" the third figure asked, pointing to the music instruments from the previous night.

"Must've gotten drunk on cream soda, dude," the fourth figure stated.

"You could get drunk on cream soda?" Izzy questioned, still maintaining an excited tone. "That's pretty cool. I didn't know they put alcohol in cream soda." She picked up a half empty can of cream soda that she spied and took a sip. "Nope. No alcohol. But you still managed to get drunk on this? That's so cool!" She leaned back to down the rest of the drink, causing Ezekiel to spill onto the floor from off of her shoulder.

"How the hell did we not notice them in the first place?" LeShawna questioned upon seeing what was happening on the stage. "You'd think we'd notice a buncha passed out white boys and their instruments as soon as we got in here."

"I'm more curious as to how they managed to stay in here all night," Courtney noted aloud.

"These guys aren't even aware that they're conscious," Duncan pointed out. "I highly doubt they would be able to ever figure that they are somewhere else right now."

"Owen!" the four fraternity brothers cheered, having managed to realize that there was someone they knew before them.

"Woo-hoo!" Owen cheered. "Delta Tau Chi!"

"Dude," the second fraternity brother said. "Do you know that guy who did that one thing that he did last night?"

"Sing?" Owen asked.

"Sing what?" the first fraternity brother asked.

"What?" the fourth fraternity brother asked.

"Why?" the third fraternity brother asked.

"Oh, oh, I know what he means!" Izzy said after finishing off the soda. "He's talking about that one guy who did that one thing that he did last night that was so cool that they want to meet him because he did that one thing and it was so cool."

"Yeah!" the second fraternity brother said, banging his head. "What she said!"

"Do you know, Izzy?" Owen asked.

"Uh-huh!" Izzy squealed. Then she pointed her finger at the subject of the conversation. "It's Trent!"

Everyone who wasn't on the stage looked at Trent in confusion. Trent himself raised a baffled brow. It took a moment's thought for everyone to realize what it was that Trent did the previous night.

"Well, you certainly did that one thing that you did last night that was so cool, handsome," Gwen teased.

"I aim to please, beautiful," Trent chuckled.

"Dude, you were awesome!" the third fraternity brother said.

"You rocked, dude!" the first fraternity brother stated.

"Could you do that again, dude?" the fourth fraternity brother asked.

"Yes, yes!" Izzy squealed like a fan girl. She zipped behind Trent and Gwen and started pushing the music man. "Izzy wants to see your hot man meat do that again!"

"You said it yourself, Trent," Gwen teased further. "You aim to please."

"Aren't you supposed to stop Izzy from acting the way she is towards me?" Trent asked with a chuckle.

"Not when she and I share the same idea," Gwen replied with a grin. "This goth girl wants to see your hot man meat up on that stage playing the guitar right now."

"Pushy, aren't we," Trent sighed with a grin. "Okay, I'll get up there and play something. Any requests?"

"Oh, I definitely got one," Gwen giggled. "DragonForce."

"DragonForce?" Trent questioned in a complaining voice. "Babe, that's gonna tire me out."

"Well, in that case," Gwen said, appearing as though she was now giving some thought to another suggestion. "DragonForce. The full version of whatever song you play."

Trent sighed and shook his head, though maintaining the grin on his face. "Tell you what, let's compromise," he said. "I'll play DragonForce, the full version of the song I play. But afterward, you gotta play the song I've been helping you learn how to play."

"Oh, this I gotta see," Duncan said with a chuckle of his own. To which he received another sharp elbow to the stomach. "Ow! Oh, come on, Princess. Gwen playing the guitar? That's worth the price of admission."

"And why should it be?" Courtney asked, glaring at her punk boyfriend.

"Think about it," Duncan began to explain. "She's a goth girl. He's a music man. He's teaching her how to play some song he probably picked out for her. And I'll betcha it's not some kinda goth song either. If nothing else, I wanna hear what up-beat tone she's been practicing on."

"I actually wouldn't mind seein' my girl rock a guitar," LeShawna admitted. "I'm down with that."

A loud wet pop was heard, causing everyone to turn to the source. Bridgette had managed to release herself from the seemingly endless kiss she had been engaged in with Geoff. "Gwen's gonna play guitar?" she asked in a highly excited tone. "I wanna see!"

"Righteous!" Geoff cheered.

"Gabby playing guitar would be so cute!" Lindsay squealed. "I can't wait!"

"Do it, Gwen!" Izzy squealed. "Do it so we can get your hunky man candy here to perform!"

"Now you really are getting way too excited about seeing Trent play, Izzy," Gwen noted, rolling her eyes. She took a quick look at the others, seeing that almost everyone was very interested in seeing her perform. Or at least know which song she had been learning how to play. With a sigh, she turned back to Trent with a smile. "Okay, I give. I'll play, so long as you do DragonForce."

"I'm holding you to that, beautiful," Trent stated as he made his way onto the stage.

"I bet you will, handsome," Gwen giggled.

"Woo-hoo!" Izzy cheered. "Delicious man candy about to be served!"

"So you guys familiar with any DragonForce?" Trent asked as he started tuning up his guitar.

"Totally," the third fraternity brother answered. "But we are the words, dude?"

"You don't know the words to any of their songs?" Trent questioned.

"What words?" the fourth fraternity brother asked.

"What songs?' the first fraternity brother asked.

Trent sighed. "Well, I can't sing if I'm going to be playing the way I have to," he muttered aloud in thought. He then turned out to the others. "Hate to ask, but any of the guys know DragonForce?"

There was no immediate response until a hand shyly began to raise. "Um, I kinda know the words to one song..." Cody said.

"That's great," Trent said. "Come on up, Codester."

"Y-You sure about that?" Cody asked nervously.

"Go for it, Cody," Beth said in delight. He turned to see her smile with a great deal of excitement. Making him feel even more nervous than before. "I bet you sound great."

Cody swallowed hard and then took a deep breath. "Well..." he managed to utter. "Okay. I guess I can sing..."

"Go, Cody!" Beth cheered as the techno geek bashfully made his way onto the stage.

"Now this will definitely be fun to see," Noah said with a smirk on his face.

"Look, Timmy!" Lindsay cried. "Cory is gonna sing!"

"How laughable this will be," Heather muttered in a quiet voice.

"Here's your chance to impress some ladies, kid!" Duncan called out.

"Just take it easy, Cody," Trent said as the techno geek got to the stage. "It's not like we're performing in front of last night's crowd. It's only the few of us. Nothing to worry about."

"Yeah..." Cody uttered nervously. "Sure... Nothing to worry about..."

"Which song do you know, by the way?" Trent asked.

"Um, _Through the Fire and Flames_," Cody replied.

"Alright then," Trent said. He went over to the fraternity brothers, who themselves were setting up to their chosen instruments, and told them the song they were playing. "Just take a deep breath, Cody. You ready."

Cody took a deep breath. "Ready," he squeaked. Nervousness continued to course though his body when Izzy, Katie, Sadie, Lindsay, and Beth started cheering and squealing.

Trent and the band began to play the song. The audience watched in amazement as less than half a second into the song, Trent began shredding his guitar at high speed. It was almost difficult to see his fingers clearly, instead witnessing a blur over the guitar strings on both ends. It wasn't long before Cody began to sing.

_"On a cold winter morning,  
In the time before the light,  
In flames of death's eternal reign,  
We ride towards the fight._

_"When the darkness has fallen down,  
And the times are tough alright,  
The sound of evil laughter falls,  
Around the world tonight._

_"Fighting hard, fighting on for the steel,  
Through the wastelands evermore,  
The scattered souls will feel the hell,  
Bodies wasted on the shore._

_"On the blackest plains in Hell's domain,  
We watch them as they go,  
Through the fire and pain and once again we know!_

_"So now we're flying, we're free,  
We're free before the thunderstorm,  
On towards the wilderness,  
Our quest carries on._

_"Far beyond the sundown,  
Far beyond the moonlight,  
Deep inside our hearts and all our souls!_

_"So far away we wait for the day,  
For the lives all so wasted and gone,  
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days,  
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!_

_"As the red day is dawning,  
And the lightning cracks the sky,  
They'll raise their hands to the heavens above,  
With resentment in their eyes._

_"Running back through the midmorning light,  
There's a burning in my heart,  
We're banished from a time in a fallen land,  
To a life beyond the stars._

_"In your darkest dreams, see to believe,  
Our destiny in time,  
And endlessly we'll all be free tonight!_

_"And on the wings of a dream,  
So far beyond reality,  
All alone in desperation,  
Now the time has gone._

_"Lost inside you'll never find,  
Lost within my own mind,  
Day after day this misery must go on!_

_"So far away we wait for the day,  
For the lives all so wasted and gone,  
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days,  
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!_

_"Wha-o-o!  
Whao-o-oh!  
Whao-o-oh!_

_"Wha-o-o!  
Whao-o-oh!  
Whao-o-oh!"_

For the next minute and a half, Trent and the main guitarist of the band dazzled with an incredible display of speed shredding the likes of which no one in the audience had seen before. They watched in awe as both performers were constantly playing faster and harder with each passing second they played. Only Gwen had a different look on her face. One that was painted with a giddy grin that spread from ear to ear. They had barely finished playing when Cody resumed singing.

_"Now here we stand with their blood on our hands,  
We fought so hard, now can we understand,  
I'll break the seal of this curse if I possibly can,  
For freedom of every man!_

_"So far away we wait for the day,  
For the lives all so wasted and gone,  
We feel the pain of a lifetime lost in a thousand days,  
Through the fire and the flames we carry on!"_

Trent and the main guitarist continued to shred for another half a minute before finally ending the song. When all was said and done, Beth led one large collection of cheers and squeals that included Izzy, Katie, Sadie, and Lindsay. The sight of which causing Cody to blush a deep shade of pink. Most of the others applauded with great enthusiasm. Gwen was doing all she could to not giggle uncontrollably like a school girl.

"Not bad, Cody," Trent said, catching he breath from how hard and fast he played.

"Th-Thanks..." Cody managed to utter. After taking a few breaths, he made his way off the stage and back to his seat. Just before he could sit down, he found himself immediately embraced by an excited Beth.

"That was so cool, Cody!" Beth cheered. She took no notice of the pink that appeared on his cheeks.

Trent bent down on the stage before Gwen and stretched out the guitar toward her. "I played DragonForce," he said with a grin. "Now it's your turn, babe."

Gwen maintained a smile as she gave out a sigh and ascended onto the stage, taking the guitar from her boyfriend. The others watched with great anticipation as Gwen was about to sing and play the guitar.

"This should be rich," Heather scoffed quietly.

As Gwen started tuning the guitar, Trent told the band which song they were playing. He then stepped over to one side and sat down in a chair that just happened to be next to the podium. The band began perform and Gwen started singing. The entire time, her complete attention was focused upon her boyfriend.

_"I went to a party last Saturday night,  
I didn't get laid, I got in a fight,  
Uh-huh,  
It ain't no big thing._

_"Late for my job and the traffic was bad,  
Had to borrow ten bucks from my old man,  
Uh-huh,  
It ain't no big thing._

_"I went to a party last Saturday night,  
I told you that story, I'd be alright,  
Uh-huh,  
It ain't no big thing._

_"But I know what I like,  
I know I like dancin' with you,  
And I know what you like,  
I know you like dancin' with me,  
Yeah, yeah._

_"Kiss me once,  
Kiss me twice,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me deadly._

_"Had a few beers, gettin' high,  
Sittin', watchin' the time go by,  
Uh-huh,  
It ain't no big thing._

_"Nothin' to eat and no TV,  
Lookin' in the mirror don't get it for me,  
Uh-huh,  
It ain't no big thing._

_"But I know what I like,  
I know I like dancin' with you,  
And I know what you like,  
I know you like dancin' with me,  
Oh, yeah._

_"Kiss me once,  
Kiss me twice,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me deadly._

_"Kiss me once,  
Kiss me twice,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me deadly."_

As Gwen played the guitar solo, she started to lean back against Trent. The music man merely chuckled while she performed around and, in a manner of speaking, upon him. She even tilted her head back down so that she was looking straight up at him.

_"You know I like dancin' with you,  
Dancin' with you,  
C'mon!_

_"Kiss me once,  
Kiss me twice,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me deadly._

_"Kiss me once,  
Kiss me twice,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me,  
C'mon pretty baby,  
Kiss me deadly!"_

Gwen played the finishing guitar solo while literally being on top of Trent. The sight of her playing eliciting cheers from the others even as she and the band finally brought the song to an end. Afterward, she smiled and lost herself in Trent's gaze. Nearly all the girls were cheering quite loudly for what they saw.

"How did I do, handsome?" Gwen asked.

"Not bad, beautiful," Trent replied with a smile of his own. "Not bad at all."

"Girl, what are you waitin' for?" LeShawna cheered. "Just kiss him already!"

Gwen did exactly that to the delight of the others, the girls in particular. While the kiss didn't last, it was apparent that the two were still very much in the mood as Trent lifted her just as he rose to his feet. He carried her off the stage and back to their original seats while some of the guys started howling.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Katie - /_Decorating the room with pink plushies._/ "Ohmygod, like, Gwen was so cool playing guitar."  
Sadie - /_Also decorating the room with pink plushies._/ "I know, right? She, like, rocked!"  
Katie - "Totally! She was, like, such a natural."  
Sadie - "And she was, like, so cute the way she danced around with Trent."  
Katie - "They're, like, the second cutest couple here."  
Sadie - /_Raises a curious brow._/ "Second?"  
Katie - "D'uh, silly. Me and Noah-bear are the cutest couple. And look!" /_Holds up a pink bear plushie with clothing similar to Noah's normal attire._/ "I have my own Noah-bear to sleep with at night!"  
Sadie - "Ohmygosh, that's so cute!"  
Together - "EEEEEEEEEE!"

Tyler - /_Looks around at plushies about in the room nervously._/ "... They're so... pink..."

Noah - "I am aware that Katie has a bear plushie that looks like me. I know because I helped her make it. She also wanted me to help her make this." /_Holds up a pink cat plushie with clothing to Katie's normal attire._/ "You gotta admit, the craftsmanship is actually pretty good. And I'm not just saying that because I'm her boyfriend."

Tyler - /_Still looking nervously at the plushies._/ "... I dunno why... but I'm starting to freak out here..."

Beth - /_Giggles._/ "Cody was really cute when he was singing, wasn't he?" /_Giggles and snorts._/

Cody - /_Scratches his head, blushes_./ "I'm pretty sure Beth likes me. I mean, she was really nice to me, was encouraging to me... and she hugged me after I sang..."

Tyler - /_Starts to shutter, continues looking at the plushies nervously._/ "Seriously, dude... This is getting creepy... It's almost like they're chi... like they're chick..." /_Whimpers._/

Ezekiel - /_Examines a bear plushie curiously._/ "Soo... girls like these things, eh? I w'oonder w'oot they d'oo with them, th'oo." /_Continues to examine plushie._/ "I d'oon't get it, eh."

Lindsay - /_Squealing, playing with a plushie._/ "They are so precious!"  
Tyler - /_Trying not to act nervous._/ "Yeah, babe. Really cool, aren't they?"  
Lindsay - "They're so many!" /_Gasps with glee._/ "Oh, look!" /Bends down and picks up another plushie./ "It's a cute little tiger! EEEEE! He's so adorable!"  
Tyler - /_Is confused._/ "Uh... yeah! He... is adorable."  
Lindsay - "He looks so much like you, Tiger." /_Gasps again._/ "Your name is Tiger!" /_Immediately pounces on Tyler before he reacts, casing him to fall onto the bed of plushies. Kissing sounds are heard._/

Izzy - /_Drools._/ "Hot, delicious man candy on display for Izzy to devour. Izzy can't get enough. Izzy want more. Izzy want a whole menu of man meat to choose from." /_Giggles in a devilish manner._/

Duncan - "Since when did Izzy start becoming so perverted all of a sudden? It's not enough that she's got Owen to blow away, now she wants to see all of the guys in some kind of sexy manner. Well, except for Justin, of course."

Harold - "There was this little purple puppy plushie that I wanted to get for LeShawna after I got back from the island. But then my brother stole it one night and gave it to my sister. I didn't realize what had happened until maybe like a couple days before I came here. I didn't have the heart to tell my sister that the plushie was meant for LeShawna." /_Sighs._/

Gwen - "As much fun as I had doing all that singing and guitar playing with Trent, I did kinda feel a little sad. We so much wanna see Harold and LeShawna move forward with their relationship. Setting up that double date is getting tricker than we thought. I dunno about you, but I have this feeling that the whole quarantine ordeal was just some pathetic idea of Chris' to make everyone miserable. As if he doesn't already do that on a weekly basis."

* * *

Chris had his arms crossed, tapping his right toe impatiently. "C'mon, already," he said through the gas mask. "Who knows what kind of fun we're missing out because of this. How much longer before you guys lift the contamination order?"

"We need to make sure this man is thoroughly scrubbed to ensure there will be no further infection," the inspector in a hazmat suit answered in a droll voice. He appeared suspiciously similar looking and sounding to the stage-hands and Mr. Black.

"Well, thanks a lot, Chef," Chris stated. "You just had to go an ruin a good day's worth of seeing our twenty-two freaks experiencing school life all because you wanted to create another culinary masterpiece. In Riker Hall, no less. Dude, what the hell were you thinking? Can you imagine the kinda lawsuits we could be getting here?"

"You think I'm enjoyin' this?" Chef screamed. He was being washed from head to toe with identical looking men in hazmat suits scrubbing with a great deal of force. "These guys are rubbin' against places I don't want no man touchin'!"

"Exterior of subject body is secure," one of the washers said. "However, there is traces of infection within the interior."

"What?" Chef cried. "N-No way! Y-Yer just jokin', right? Th-There's nuttin' in there!" He received no immediate answer. "C'mon, man! Stop playin' around! Chris, get them to stop!"

"This is gonna take all day, isn't it?" Chris asked the inspector in a miffed tone. If he had gotten an answer, it was drowned out by the most high-pitched screaming he had ever heard from a grown man.

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 2 - Sunday)**

"Forget it, Izzy!" the voice of Noah sounded, causing everyone in the Marshmallow to awaken. "There's no chance in hell you are gonna make me or Katie play a stupid game like Truth or Dare."

"What makes you think I wanna ask Katie to play?" Izzy asked. She was looking just as miffed as Noah, both shooting death glares at one another. Him with his arms crossed over his chest, her with her knuckles on her hips.

"Because I know exactly want you're gonna dare her to do," Noah answered. "You're gonna dare her to convince me to kiss Cody, which itself is the dare you would want me to do."

"Come on, Noah," Izzy teased. "It's only one harmless little kiss." She puckered her lips and started making kissing noises. "What's the matter? Afraid you might like it?"

"Dear Enemy, may the lord hate you and all your kind," Noah stated sternly. "May you turn orange in hue, and may your head fall off at an awkward moment."

"Okay, now I'm really disturbed," Duncan grumbled with a yawn. "Where the hell did this idea of Izzy wanting to see Noah and Cody kiss come from?"

"Back on the island, during the sleeping challenge," Trent replied with a yawn of his own. "One morning, we caught them cuddle up and Noah was sleep kissing Cody's ear pretty good. Izzy's been on Noah about it ever since."

"So that's what she meant by wanting to make him go the distance," Harold said in a tired tone.

"The strange part is that I don't get a say in any of this," Cody managed to utter quietly.

"Kiss him!" Izzy demanded.

"No!" Noah responded.

"Yes!" Izzy pressed.

"No!" Noah repeated.

"Yes!" Izzy yelled.

"No!" Noah stated.

"Yes!" Izzy screamed.

"No!" Noah barked.

"No!" Izzy cried.

"I'm not falling for that trick," Noah retorted. To this, Izzy blew a loud raspberry directly at his face. Forcing him to wipe his face of the spit he was nearly drenched in. "There is nothing you can say or do that will make me kiss Cody, Izzy."

"Oh, really?" Izzy questioned. She then began to cackled in a menacing manner. "Then you have two choices. You can either kiss Cody... or you have to go on stage and sing. Shirtless!"

Noah raised a brow and stared at Izzy for a moment before shaking his head. He then removed his shirt and proceeded toward the stage. The sight of Noah without his shirt caused Katie to swoon.

"Mind if I borrow your boyfriend for a moment?" Noah asked Gwen.

"I dunno," Gwen teased in her sleepy tone. "Does he have to take his shirt off, too?"

Noah made no response, merely just rolling his eyes before getting onto the stage. Once he was there, Katie started squealing with a great deal of excitement. Trent eventually got onto the stage, keeping his shirt on, with guitar in hand. The band managed to get themselves positioned with their instruments while Noah told them which song he was going to sing. Once every was prepared, they began to perform.

_"The sewers belch me up,  
The heavens spit me out,  
From ethers tragic I am born again._

_"And now I'm with you now,  
Inside your world of wow,  
To move in desires made of deadly pretends,  
Till the end times begin._

_"Is it bright where you are,  
Have the people changed,  
Does it make you happy you're so strange,  
And in your darkest hour, I hold secret's flame,  
You can watch the world devoured in its pain,  
Strange._

_"Climb my ribcage to,  
The replays run for you,  
Unhook my lights to peek behind the flash._

_"For I am crystal chrome,  
I am shatter dome,  
I am Kremlin king of angels avenged,  
To destroy the end._

_"Is it bright where you are,  
Have the people changed,  
Does it make you happy you're so strange,  
And in your darkest hour, I hold secret's flame,  
You can watch the world devoured in its pain."_

Noah did nothing special as Trent played his solo. The egghead merely stood in place with his arms crossed over his chest. Yet even the sight of him at all was making Katie just squirm with delight. Sadie was excited only because Katie was. Lindsay just went along, not really understanding why. Izzy, however, was glaring at Noah.

_"The zeppelins rain upon us,  
The guns of love disastrous,  
A shadow lies amongst you,  
To defy the future cast._

_"Is it bright where you are,  
Have the people changed,  
Does it make you happy you're so strange,  
And in your darkest hour, I hold secret's flame,  
You can watch the world devoured in its pain,  
Strange,  
Strange."_

When the song finished, most of the other applauded in approval. Katie continued to squeal about as Noah made his way off the stage. He returned Izzy's glare with one of his own before he bent down to pick up his shirt. But before he could put it back on, Katie pounced upon him and kissed him quite passionately. What caught a lot of the others by surprise was that they swore they could see heart-shaped bubbles coming off of her and popping seconds later.

"I don't think Izzy thought through her plan to humiliate Noah," Harold noted aloud.

"More like it backfired on her badly," Duncan added.

"Izzy wants man candy to make her feel better," Izzy pouted.

"We're not here for your entertainment, crazy girl," Justin stated.

"I don't think she's gonna listen to you, man," DJ noted. He was oblivious to the glare the male model was giving him.

"Not to mention that reason won't stop her," Gwen added. She sighed and turned back to her boyfriend on the stage. "Looks like you're gonna be stuck up there for a while, handsome."

"Guess I don't have anything better to do, beautiful," Trent responded. "So... Any one wanna sing something?"

"Oh, I wanna sing!" Owen called. "I've been wanting to sing more since the challenge the other night!"

"Alright, big guy," Trent said. "Come on up."

"Ooo!" Izzy mused as she watched her oaf of a boyfriend wobble onto the stage. "Hunky man candy! Izzy like!"

"Can someone explain what the hell is up with Izzy this weekend?" Duncan asked. "This is the most perverted I've ever seen any one get. And believe me, there's a lot of perverts I've had the misfortune of running into in juvie."

"I highly doubt there's any sort of logical explanation for Izzy's behavior," Gwen stated. "We just go along for the ride. Besides, searching for an answer would likely cause insanity."

Duncan sighed. "I'm just glad she and Owen didn't go for it last night," he mumbled under his breath.

Owen told Trent and the band which song he was going to sing. The title bringing big smiles on everyone's faces as they began tuning up their instruments. They than began to perform, rocking with a great deal of enthusiasm. Upon hearing the first few notes, everyone knew which song was being played. And it brought smiles to a lot of the faces.

_"Well, shake it up, baby, now,  
(Shake it up, baby.)  
Twist and shout,  
(Twist and shout.)  
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, baby, now,  
(Come on, baby.)  
Come on and work it on out.  
(Work it on out, ooo!)_

_"Well, work it on out, honey,  
(Work it on out.)  
You know you look so good,  
(Look so good.)  
You know you got me goin', now,  
(Got me goin'.)  
Just like I knew you would.  
(Like I knew you would, ooo!)_

_"Well, shake it up, baby, now,  
(Shake it up, baby.)  
Twist and shout,  
(Twist and shout.)  
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, baby, now,  
(Come on, baby.)  
Come on and work it on out.  
(Work it on out, ooo!)_

_"You know you're a twisty little girl,  
(Twist little girl.)  
You know you twist so fine,  
(Twist so fine.)  
Come on and twist a little closer, now,  
(Twist a little closer.)  
And let me know that you're mine.  
(Let me know you're mine, ooo!)"_

As Trent played the simple guitar solo, most of the others started jumping up to their feet and dancing along to the song. None more so than Izzy, who went so far as to literally hop onto the stage and start dancing in a crazy fashion.

_"Ahhhhh,  
Ahhhhh,  
Ahhhhh,  
Ahhhhh,  
Woah, yeah!  
(Ahhhhh!)_

_"Well, shake it up, baby, now,  
(Shake it up, baby.)  
Twist and shout,  
(Twist and shout.)  
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, baby, now,  
(Come on, baby.)  
Come on and work it on out.  
(Work it on out, ooo!)_

_"You know you're a twisty little girl,  
(Twist little girl.)  
You know you twist so fine,  
(Twist so fine.)  
Come on and twist a little closer, now,  
(Twist a little closer.)  
And let me know that you're mine.  
(Let me know you're mine, ooo!)_

_"Well, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby, now,  
(Shake it up baby.)  
Well, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby, now,  
(Shake it up baby.)  
Well, shake it, shake it, shake it, baby, now.  
(Shake it up baby.)_

_"Ahhhhh,  
Ahhhhh,  
Ahhhhh,  
Ah!"_

When the song ended, those who were dancing cheered loudly. Izzy immediately hopped up and perched upon Owen's shoulders. She screamed wildly before planting a giant, wet kiss on the big guy's lips. She apparently liked it.

"Woo!" Izzy cheered after releasing the kiss. "Izzy feels much better!"

"Owen happy to cheer Izzy up," Owen laughed in a jolly fashion as he wobbled off of the stage.

"Dear God, don't let them engage in any form of sexual activity," Duncan muttered. For this, he received yet another shark elbow to the stomach. "Ah. Now you're starting to hit the liver, Princess."

"You really need a get a hold of yourself over Izzy and Owen," Courtney hissed. "It's not like you're any less of a pig than she has been perverted this weekend."

"This is a lot of fun!" Bridgette cheered. "We're all having a good time with some of us going up there to sing. Why not keep it going? Who else wants to perform?"

"Me!" Tyler proclaimed. "I will!" He immediately began running toward the stage with great enthusiasm.

Lindsay gasped with excitement. "Go, Tommy!" she cheered.

Tyler looked back to give her a wave, which turned out to be a bad idea as he tripped over the stairs and slammed face first on the stage. He immediately got up, trying to show that he was okay. This was in-spite of the noticeable limp in his left leg. He told Trent and the band the song he was going to sing, which caused some of the band members to head bang with great approval. When they were ready, Trent started to play the opening notes and the were off and running.

_"When I get high, I get high on speed,  
Top fuel funny car's a drug for me,  
My heart, my heart,  
Kickstart my heart._

_"Always got the cops coming after me,  
Custom built bike doing one-oh-three,  
My heart, my heart,  
Kickstart my heart._

_"Ooo, are you ready girls?  
Ooo, are you ready now?_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Give it a start,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Hope it never stops,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Skydive naked from an aeroplane,  
Or a lady with a body from outer space,  
My heart, my heart,  
Kickstart my heart._

_"Say I got trouble, trouble in my eyes,  
I'm just looking for another good time,  
My heart, my heart,  
Kickstart my heart._

_"Yeah, are you ready girls?  
Yeah, are you ready now?_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Give it a start,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Hope it never stops,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Ooo, kickstart my heart..._

_"When we started this band,  
All we needed, needed was a laugh,  
Years gone by...  
I'd say we've kicked some ass._

_"When I'm enraged, or hittin' the stage,__  
Adrenaline rushing, through my veins,  
And I'd say we're still kickin' ass._

_"Ooo, ahh,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Hope it never stops,  
And to think,  
We did all of this to rock!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Give it a start,  
Woah, yeah,  
Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Ba-Baby!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Hope it never stops,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Give it a start,  
Woah, yeah,  
Baby!_

_"Woah, yeah,  
Kickstart my heart,  
Hope it never stops,  
Woah, yeah._

_"Okay boys, let's rock the house!_

_"That's all."_

A number of the girls started screaming and squealing wildly. In particular Lindsay, Katie, Sadie, Beth, and Izzy. Izzy even looked extreme aroused at the way Tyler moved about on the stage. But Lindsay was the most excited, bouncing up and down again and again. In fact, she immediately rushed the stage and pounced Tyler on the spot before any one could even recognize that she moved from her spot in the seats.

"Sheesh, it's like all the girls can't control their hormones when the guys sing," Duncan noted aloud. Then a grin formed upon his face. "Maybe I should go there and perform, Princess." The grin grew wider when he spotted that Courtney was blushing from the statements that he was making.

But before anything more could be done, the speakers began to sound.

"Attention, teenagers," came the familiar voice of Chris McLean. "I am pleased to announce that the containment order has been lifted and you can scoot your butts on out of the Marshmallow. The producers want me to issue you all an apology for having you cooped up in there for more than twenty-four hours. You can thank Chef for that. That is all."

In a flash, the similar looking stage-hands disappeared out of the doors they were guarding. All of the students gave out heavy sighs. They slowly collected all of their things and made their way out of the amphitheater. For the most part, they were glad to be getting back into their beds.

Then there were those who felt a little disheartened that the fun they were having was over. To get their focus back into their studies. After all, they were at a school.

* * *

**Cody's Song**  
"Through the Fire and Flames" by DragonForce

**Gwen's Song**  
"Kiss Me Deadly" by Lita Ford

**Noah's Song**  
"The End is the Beginning of the End" by Smashing Pumpkins

**Owen's Song**  
"Twist and Shout" cover by The Beatles

**Tyler's Song**  
"Kickstart My Heart" by Mötley Crüe

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies

* * *

So I noticed in setting up the challenge in the last episode that all of the leads, with the exception of Trent, are competing in _Total Drama World Tour_, formally _Total Drama, The Musical_. There were five others in the original twenty-two who would also be competing in the show, so I figured this chapter would see those five sing. Most of the songs I've had in mind for the five for sometime, although I ultimately made changes to Cody and Gwen's. The direction of the type of songs to use were thanks to the single most awesome video game ever in **Brütal Legend**.

Oh, and I'm sure you all can tell that I've been enjoying **The Kobold Necromancer**'s work enough to incorporate the perverted Izzy idea throughout this chapter. Be sure to read _TDC2: Total Drama Battlegrounds_, folks.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** School Daze


	22. Week 7, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Two

**(Week 7, Day 3 - Monday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

Noah was sitting in his seat, reading a book. Class was about to begin momentarily. Just then, he noticed that someone had approached him. Standing still and proud before him. He looked up to see a determined looking Izzy stare down at him.

"I'd like to have an argument, please," she demanded.

Noah blinked once than brought his attention back to his book. "I've told you once," he said.

Izzy blinked and then looked rather confused. "No you haven't," she said.

"Yes I have," Noah said.

"When?" Izzy asked.

"Just now," Noah answered.

Izzy thought about it for a second. "No you didn't," she said.

"Yes I did," he said.

"Didn't," she said.

"I did," he said.

"Didn't," she said.

"I'm telling you, I did," he stated.

"You did not!" she stated back.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said rather suddenly, looking up from his book. "Is this a five minute argument or the full half hour?"

Izzy blinked, as though she was in a state of bewilderment. "Oh!" she said in realization. "Oh, just the five minute one." She happily pulled out a dollar bill and placed it in front of Noah.

Gwen overheard this and turned. She watched with great amusement. So much so that she was having a hard time containing her laughter and literally had to slap a hand over her mouth.

"Five minute..." Noah noted quietly as he took the dollar bill and put it in his pocket. "Thank you. Any way, I did."

"You most certainly did not," Izzy said.

"Now let's get one thing quite clear," he stated. "I most definitely told you."

"You did not," she said.

"Yes I did," he said.

"You did not," she said.

"Yes I did," he said.

"Didn't," she said.

"Yes I did," he said.

"Didn't," she said.

"Yes I did," he said.

"Look, this isn't an argument," Izzy suddenly proclaimed.

"Yes it is," Noah said.

"No it isn't," she said. "It's just contradiction."

"No it isn't," he said.

"Yes it is," she said.

"It is not," he said.

"It is!" Izzy said, pointing a finger in his face. "You just contradicted me!"

"No I didn't," Noah said.

"Oh you did!" she said.

"No, no, no, no, no," he said.

"You did, just then," she said.

"No, no, nonsense," he said.

Izzy then let out a sigh. "Oh look," she said. "This is futile."

"No it isn't," Noah said.

"I came here for a good argument," she explained.

"No you didn't," he said. "You came here for an argument."

"Well, argument is not the same as contradiction," she stated.

"Can be," he said.

"No it can't!" she said. "An argument is a collected series of statements to a definite proposition."

"No it isn't," he said.

"Yes it is!" she said. "It isn't just contradiction."

"Look, if I argue with you, I must take up a contrary position," he explained.

"But it isn't just saying, 'No it isn't,'" she said.

"Yes it is," he said.

"No it isn't!" she said. She looked away to think about what she said for a second, but then looked back. "Argument is an intellectual process. Contradiction is just the automatic gainsay of anything the other person says."

"No it isn't," he said.

"Yes it is," she said.

"Not at all," he said.

"Now look-" she began to say when a bell suddenly chimed. Eyes wide open in shock, she looked around and then found that there was a bell on Noah's desk that seemingly appeared out of nowhere.

"Thank you, good morning," he said, turning his attention back to his book.

Izzy stared in complete bewilderment. "What?" she asked.

"That's it," he explained, his attention still to his book. "Good morning."

"But I was just getting interested," she said.

"Sorry, the five minutes is up," he said, still reading his book.

"That was never five minutes just now," she said.

"Afraid it was," he said.

"No it wasn't," Izzy said, leaning forward with a smile as though the argument would continue.

Noah merely turned a page and kept reading. "Sorry, I'm not allowed to argue any more," he said.

"What?" Izzy nearly cried.

"If you want me to go on arguing, you'll have to pay for another five minutes," Noah explained, still reading his book.

"But that was never five minutes just now," Izzy complained. Noah continued to read. "Oh come on! This is ridicules!"

"I'm very sorry," Noah said, still reading his book. "But I told you, I'm not allowed to argue unless you pay."

"Oh..." Izzy said with a sigh. "Alright. There you are." She pulled out another dollar bill and laid it out on Noah's desk.

"Thank you," Noah said as he took the dollar bill. He then went back to his reading.

"Well?" Izzy asked, waiting with great anticipation.

"Well what?" Noah asked, looking up from his book.

"That was never five minutes just now," she said.

"I told you," he said. "I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid."

"I just paid," she said.

"No you didn't," he said.

"I did!" she cried.

"No you didn't," he said.

"I did!" she cried.

"No you didn't," he said.

"I did!" she cried.

"I'm telling you, you did not," he stated.

"Look, I don't want to argue about that!" Izzy proclaimed, shaking her head and crossing her arms.

"Well, I'm very sorry," Noah said. "But you didn't pay."

"A-ha!" she cried, pointing a finger right in his face. "Well, if I didn't pay, why are you arguing? Got you!"

"No you haven't," he said.

"Yes I have," she said with a nod. "If you're arguing, I must have paid."

"Not necessarily," he stated. "I could be arguing in my spare time."

Izzy stared at Noah with her jaw wide open for a moment. Then she glared at him violently and growled furiously. "Oh, I've had enough of this!" she declared.

"No you haven't," Noah said.

"Oh, shut up!" she cried before storming off. Noah watched her leave for a moment before returning to his book.

"Well that's certainly one way to deal with Izzy," Gwen commented.

"The best way to mess with Izzy is to turn one of her little games against her," Noah explained.

"And you managed to get some of her money out of it," Gwen noted.

"About ten bucks," he said.

"Next time..." she said.

"Twenty," Noah stated with a smirk on his face.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Numerous Pink Plushies)**

Gwen - "I have to say, this place is turning out to be rather decent. I got a room to myself, getting educated here will open a lot of doors for a future career, Trent can visit more often without having to waste gas, and there's a nice little feud going on between Noah and Izzy. Looks like I'll be retaining my sanity throughout the two years after all."

Noah - "All I'm merely doing is fighting fire with water. You can't get more simple than that."

Izzy - "Deuce Pembroke, amateur escape artist, is pretty sure that he's made a critical error in judgment. Handcuffs? Sure. Straightjacket? Why not? Deuce is pretty sure that getting out of the steamer trunk wouldn't have been a problem, either. Heck, Deuce is pretty sure he could get out of just about any pickle you could devise for him." /_She pauses for a minute before reaching down and pulling up a voodoo doll of Noah with her right hand._/ "All Deuce can say in his defense is that filling the steamer trunk with starving ferrets sounded like a good idea at the time." /_She puts the voodoo doll on top of the water cooler and sticks her tongue out as she prepares to insert pins into the bottom._/

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

With classes over for the day, the students generally spend their afternoons either participating in extracurricular activities or engaged in social gatherings. In some cases, couples get together so that they could enjoy one another's company in this small moment of freedom. Duncan and Courtney would fit in the latter group.

Setting themselves up against a tree near Riker Hall, the couple were spending their downtime getting to know Courtney's new pet a little more. Duncan sitting against against the tree trunk, Courtney propped up upon his back, and Brittany placed gently on her lap. Knowing how easily the raccoon could get lost so suddenly, they made sure she had some kind of identification tag. The collar may seem out of place, but it was a lot better than Duncan's suggestion of just writing "Brittany" on her tail.

"So, Princess," Duncan began to say, reaching over to scratch Brittany on the head. "What does a student council representative like yourself do here at this place any way?"

"It's... different," Courtney managed to reply. At the same time, she was petting Brittany with both hands on the sides. "My say is part of a collective, with the rest of the student council representatives. Chelsea and I would also deal directly with Janet to bring forth whatever student-related issues we might consider presenting."

"But you'd rather have some more power," Duncan noted.

Courtney let out a sigh. "I can't help it," she said. "I know in my heart that I understand what's best for people. And yet no one wants to listen to me. What the hell is the problem?"

"People are naturally ignorant?" Duncan merely suggested with a shrug. Courtney's response, to his surprise, was a heavy sigh and to hang her head. "Maybe you should just relax a little and not think too much about politics at every waking hour, okay babe?"

"How can I not?" Courtney pouted. "This is my chosen career."

"And the same people in that career have lives of their own," Duncan pointed out. As he spoke, he used his free hand to start massaging Courtney's shoulder. "They're not all business, no play everyday, you know. They think about other things, too. They think about their family, their pets, their loved ones..."

"All this romantic talk and you rubbing my shoulders is just your way of wanting to finally get my panties off, isn't it?" Courtney questioned sternly. With a hint of sensuality in her tone. "You ogre."

"You know me," Duncan chuckled. "Every chance I get, I'll gladly be Dr. Feelgood."

"Is that so?" Courtney asked with a sly smile. "Well then, doctor, what do you prescribe?"

"At present, you should continue receiving soothing shoulder rubs," Duncan answered, changing up the pace and pressure of the shoulder rub he was giving her. "Later on, you should lie down and let an experienced massage therapist release the tension from every inch of your body."

"Every inch you say," Courtney noted in a slight moan. "Perhaps I'm willing to let this 'experienced' therapist massage every inch above the waist for the time being."

"Whatever makes you comfortable, Princess," Duncan whispered. "But eventually, we're going to go the distance for this relationship to really work. Besides, they say that it helps clear one's head to do so." He then leaned in to place a gentle kiss on her cheek, which immediately turned pink on contact.

"Maybe so," Courtney said. "Although one has to be careful. It could lead to some rather... explosive... results. Just look at Owen and Izzy when they engage in such behavior."

Duncan mustered every strength in his being to keep from shuttering and to also purge the thought out of his head. The subject was an absolute mood killer for him and this was not the time to let it get the best of him. "Well, the intensity of it all would leave those to be all hot and bothered," he quickly noted. "It still gets the job done in releasing virtually any and all tension."

"I bet you know all about it," Courtney teased. "Being Dr. Feelgood and all."

"You'd be surprised just how willing someone can be patient," Duncan said. "I hear that doing so leads to riches the likes of which man would never believe in their lifetime."

"Then let's give you a taste of what awaits," Courtney said. She turned enough of her upper body to literally grab Duncan by the back of the head and pull him into a deep and passionate kiss. Brittany sat on Courtney's lap, cocking to her to one side in bewilderment of what was going on.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with Noah Voodoo Doll)**

Courtney - /_Sits back and lets out a sigh, stroking Brittany who is on her lap._/ "Am I really that stuck up? Am I just so wound up that it effects the way I present myself and interact with others?" /_Brittany looks down, sniffs, and picks up one of many pink plushies._/ "Am I also doing myself... and Duncan... a disservice by not... well... letting him into my panties, so to speak?" /_Courtney blushes and looks away while Brittany sniffs at the pink plushie before proceeding to bite into it._/ "I'm just so nervous about all the bad things that could happen if we go that far." /_Lets out a heavy sigh._/ "He is right, though. It would relieve me of a lot of stress. And it really could clear my head." /_She does not notice Brittany ripping off the plushie head and spilling white cotton all over the floor._/

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

**(The Others)**

"And on that fateful day, his followers obediently drank the poison brew," the professor concluded. Some of the students started to react with gaps and were in awe. Mostly in a negative fashion. "Jonestown. One charismatic leader exerting his demonic will over scores of followers. What lesson can we take form this tragic example of herd-like behavior? Owen?"

"Um..." Owen uttered as he thought about the question for a moment. "BYOB?"

The professor released a heavy sigh, suppressing the exact emotion he was truly feeling. "Please return to your stupor, Owen..." he stated in a rather low voice.

"Okay!" Owen responded in an excited tone.

"... while we continue our discussion of cults," the professor continued despite the interruption. "Can anyone give me another example of a group using coercive techniques such as peer pressure, chanting, and social isolation to achieve control over its members?" The professor found his attention focused on a student who seemed to have elicit the same emotions he was feeling within for Owen. "Lindsay?"

Lindsay twirled stands of hair with her finger as she thought long and hard about the question. "Cheerleading?" she replied.

The professor released another heavy sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Ah, Lindsay," he began to say. "Sometimes, despite a complete lack of insight, you stumble upon an interesting answer."

"Wow," Lindsay said in amazement and awe. "And I didn't even have to read the chapter!"

"She'll never have to worry about mind control," Eva commented aloud in a quiet whisper. She was not expecting any one to respond to her statement and was rather surprised when someone did.

"No," Duncan whispered back. "But she'll have to watch out for ferrets building a nest in her head."

When the bell rang, the professor let out a great sigh of relief. "Now remember, class," he called out to the students were were looking to exit as quickly as possible. "Your term papers are due Friday. And no excuses will be accepted."

Once the students were outside, they began to converse as though they had been released from a containment that prevented them from speaking. Although Bridgette and Geoff instead engaged in their forever lasting game of tonsil hockey. Lindsay and Tyler decided to follow suit, under the belief that they were celebrating her getting the right answer.

"How much longer ya think all tha professors at this school quit on account of us?" LeShawna asked curiously.

"At the rate we're going?" Trent noted. "I'd give it month before the entire school goes mental."

"That's if we don't go mental ourselves," Duncan noted. "I thought for sure we'd be making these guys scream for their mothers by the end of the second week. They must have dealt with our kind in the past."

"I doubt in such a large number, though," Trent pointed out.

"Yeah, but not everyone is grouped together," Duncan stated further. "By having weeded out the smarty pants of the bunch, they now can better strategize for the rest of us."

"I actually don't think it's so much that us as a collective would drive them nuts," DJ injected.

"What makes you say that, big man?" LeShawna asked curiously.

"They expected the majority of us to come in with extremely low expectations," DJ explained. "I bet they never imagined in their wildest dreams that as the first period comes to a close all twenty-two of us are above the passing grade level."

"You're kidding," Duncan nearly cried. "Everyone is passing right now? Including Owen and Lindsay?"

"Guess they're not as dumb as they seem," DJ commented with a shrug.

"You think maybe they're getting some help?" Trent asked.

"For studying, maybe," Duncan replied. "You know how Jessica was rattling off how paranoid the school is about cheating. I took a look into it, she ain't lying. These guys will know if someone was not being legit."

"I don't even wanna know how you found out," LeShawna muttered.

"Believe me, you don't," Duncan responded with a sigh.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with One Destroyed Pink Plushie)**

LeShawna - "Ever since Harold and Courtney called a truce, Duncan and I have been tryin' ta act all civil ta one another. Outta respect for tha others. But you can bet if that punk even slips once I'm rippin' those piercin's outta his brow and shovin' them right up his rectum. Make no mistake about it."

Trent - "The biggest road block Gwen and I are now facing in trying to plan our double date idea with Harold and LeShawna has been what Chris will have in store for the Friday Night Challenges. You can never really tell what he's up to, and it makes planning for the weekend that much harder. Especially if things happen that results in some of us getting hurt, which he clearly has no problem with letting happen since he did the same back on the island."

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 6 - Thursday)**

Heather sat alone on a bench. She was reading from a book when she noticed that someone was approaching. She looked up to see the silhouette of a figure, their features being blackened by standing directly in front of the sun. What she could clearly make out, however, was a particular insignia that appeared to be on the figure's hand. Heather reached into her pocket and revealed a different, yet matching insignia of her own.

"Greetings, Artemis," the figure said.

"Greetings, Athena," Heather said back.

She scooted over so that Chelsea may sit down. Now able to get a better look, Heather could see that the other came with more in hand than just her insignia.

"I come barring gifts from Hera," Chelsea said, handing Heather a light colored box. "Just keep it out of sight and don't even mouth about its contents. Think of it as our way of making sure you well taken care of as a member of the Dodekatheon."

Heather looked around, making sure that there were no unwanted attention. Either from eyes or from a camera lens. She opened the box just enough for her to get a small peek. The contents brought a satisfying smile upon her face before closing the box back up and setting it on her lap.

"Give Hera my thanks," she said.

"A couple more things," Chelsea noted, waving her finger. "Firstly, watch your back whenever you are around your Resident Assistant. She can cause you a lot of trouble when you least expect it."

"You don't need to tell me twice," Heather responded.

"I'm serious, Artemis," Chelsea stated. "You have yet to see what she is truly capable of. But for now, on to more pressing business." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a photograph to show Heather. "Take one look at the photograph and engrave it into your memory. You will never physically see it again." She withdrew the photo and placed it back into her pocket.

"I assume this is a problem I am to take care of," Heather said.

"As requested by Poseidon," Chelsea explained. "He believes this simpleton will be of great annoyance in the weeks to come and wishes to not be bothered about him ever."

"How would he like for me to pull this off?" Heather asked.

"He is allowing you to do whatever you feel would be best," Chelsea answered. "Just remember to keep this from being linked back to him and to us. Completion of your task in a timely and exquisite manner will be most rewarding for you."

"Consider it done," Heather said with a nod.

"One more thing," Chelsea said. "Zeus wishes to know how well acquainted you are with one of your associates, Lindsay."

"Depends on his interest in her," Heather said, raising a curious brow regarding the subject. "Otherwise, I know a good deal about her if he is merely seeking information."

"He is," Chelsea responded. She got up from the bench and started walking away. "For now."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Files her nails._/ "I owe no amount of allegiance or favors to Lind-siot. Not after what she called me back on the island following that bicycle race that got her the boot. If they give me the word, I'll gladly hand deliver her to Zeus."

Lindsay - /_Sits on Tyler's lap, runs a hand through his hair, hums a loving tune._/ "I'm smart, aren't I?"  
Tyler - /_Twirling strands of Lindsay's hair._/ "Of course you are, babe. You got to the right answer in that class the other day."  
Lindsay - /_Giggles._/ "I know, right. Maybe I do belong in this school. I'm just as smart as the rest of them."  
Tyler - "No. You're smarter than them, Lemon."  
Lindsay - /_Swoons._/ "Oh, Tiger." /_Shifts her weight onto Tyler as she gives him a kiss, causing the the chair to tip back and spilling them onto the pile of pink plushies while making kissing, giggling, and chuckling noises throughout._/

* * *

**(Week 7, Day 7 - Friday)**

"It's Friday night!" Chris McLean announced. "Do you know what that means?"

"CHALLENGE NIGHT!" the audience cheered. They continued to hoot and holler, making as much noise as they can in great anticipation for what was about to come.

"That's right!" Chris said. "Coming to you from the Marshmallow at Riker Hall in Richmore Academy, it's the Friday Night Challenge on Total Drama Academy!" The audience cheered once again as the handsome host milked it for all of it was worth. "Tonight will be a very special challenge. These kids have worked so hard and provided us so much fun the last six weeks, we're going to offer at least half of them a chance to join DJ in getting the night off."

The audience began murmuring and whispering among themselves as to what Chris could possibly mean. The contestants merely stood to the side of stage, waiting for what would surely be inevitable punishment to occur.

"Take a good look at the stage, ladies and gentlemen," Chris said. "There are twenty-one sets of strings. Each attached to a rock. They are also attached to one of twenty-one buckets hanging above in the rafters. Cut the string and the bucket will turn over. Eleven of those twenty-one buckets contains a gooey, slimy substance. Our students will select a string to cut. If nothing falls on them, they are safe from competing this week. But get doused by slime, and they'll be participating in our most exciting challenge yet. It's a game better known as... RUSSIAN ROULETTE!"

The audience started to cheer for what they were about to see. The contestants groaned, believing that this was still going to be something terrible that they would have to endure.

"Here's the deal," Chris continued. "Being last week's winner, DJ is safe from competing. As I noted, at least half of our contestants will also be safe. Meaning we will be doing another guys against girls round. But we will be going all for one and one for all. What do I mean by that? Being named last week's looo-ser, Heather will be the determining factor of whether all of the girls or the rest of the guys will be safe from competing. So come on up, Heather!"

Heather stood in horror at the rotten luck she was in. The audience was cheering wildly and now she was in a position where she could very well piss off the rest of the girls royally with one snip of a string. After swallowing hard, she tip toed her way onto the center of the stage where Chris awaited.

"This is how it's gonna go," Chris explained. "Heather here will choose which string she wishes to cut. If she walks away clean, then all of the girls will be safe from competing. If slime falls onto her, then all of the guys will be safe from competing. Furthermore, she will be among those lucky enough to participate in challenge."

"What if she gets slimed, but the rest of us girls don't?" Beth asked curiously.

"Great question, Beth," Chris replied. "You get a cookie!" He signaled for the Resident Assistant, Jessica, to toss Beth a cookie. During which a section of the audience cheered. In response, Chris merely sighed. "You people and your cookies. Any who, suppose Heather gets doused yet no one else does. That means she will be the only one competing in the challenge."

"That's not fair at all!" Heather screamed.

"It's the luck of the draw," Chris pointed out. "Everyone else has a fifty percent chance of walking away without getting slimed. Heck, if no one gets doused then everyone is safe from competing. It's the opportunity of a lifetime, kids! So choose wisely. Your fate is now ultimately in your own hands. So Heather, pick a string and cut away!"

Heather noticed that there was a drumroll playing. She looked over to see a grinning Chef Hatchet doing the honors. With a huff, Heather turned back to look at the twenty-one strings presented to her. She gave out a sigh and picked one of the closer strands. She then took a deep breath and picked up the pair of scissors at her feet. She then nervously opened them up and placed the blades around the string. The audience all gasped as she proceeded to cut the string.

Heather braced herself.

But nothing happened.

Heather dared to look up and see that there was nothing coming out of the bucket. She let out a sigh of relief.

"And with that, all of the girls are safe from competing!" Chris announced. The females in the audience screamed with joy while all of the girls on stage let out cheers of victory. "So that leaves our remaining ten guys to see just how lucky they can be. Remember that each has a fifty percent chance of competing. Go ahead and find a string to clip, boys."

The ten remaining contestants made their way onto the stage. Most took their time and examined each string to see if they could tell whether one would lead to an empty bucket. After a few moments, all ten were standing next to a string of their choice with scissors in their hands and waiting for further instructions.

"Alright, let's do this alphabetically," Chris stated. "Which means you're first, Cody."

Cody swallowed as he nervously brought the scissors up to the string of his choice. He looked away as he made that all important snip that would cut the string and then braced himself.

Nothing happened.

"Cody is safe!" Chris proclaimed. Cody let out a sigh of relief. But then he found himself blushing as all the females in the audience were screaming madly, some of them actually calling out his name. He blushed even more when he noticed Beth trying to hide her giggling. "Up next is Duncan."

Duncan rolled his eyes and got the whole thing over with as quickly as he could. He brought the scissors up and in a very nonchalant manner cut the string.

Seconds later, he was doused in slime. The audience screamed upon witnessing this, including Courtney. The initial impact of being hit with slime caused him to flinch in horror. He then realized what just happened and groaned in frustration.

"Oh!" Chris cried. "Duncan is slimed! That means, at the very least, he will be competing in this week's challenge. Tough break, dude. Looks like Ezekiel is next to test his luck."

The prairie boy swallowed hard and nervously brought the scissors up to the string of his choice. Much like Cody, he looked away as he made the cut. Only he was too afraid to brace himself.

Even if he did, it would not have helped as he was doused in slime. As before, the audience screamed. Bridgette and Izzy were saddened to see this. The impact causing him to squeak in horror as he found himself covered from head to toe in slime.

"And Ezekiel joins Duncan in this week's challenge!" Chris announced. "Too bad, man. Now it's Geoff's turn."

The party dude was very much relaxed as he brought the scissors up to the cut the strong of his choice. Once the cut was made, he retained his laid back appearance and welcomed whatever happened.

Though when he found himself doused in slime rather suddenly, he let out quite the surprised scream. He did so just as the audience let out screams of their own. Bridgette herself seemed to be on the verge of tears.

"Geoff gets slimed!" Chris stated. "He joins Duncan and Ezekiel in this week's challenge. Next up is Harold."

Harold took a good look at the results that had occurred before him and then gave out a heavy sigh. He brought the scissors up and cut the string. He then braced himself.

Which was probably as well given that he soon found himself covered in slime. Once again, the audience screamed. LeShawna cursed and let out a sorrowful sigh. Harold let out a frustrated groan of his own as a result of the sudden turn of events.

"Harold is not safe!" Chris proclaimed. "He joins Duncan, Ezekiel, and Geoff in this week's challenge."

"Four consecutive hits," Duncan muttered. "What are the odds?"

"Up next is Justin," Chris said.

The male model looked nervously at the string and then at the four who were doused before him. He took a deep breath and brought the scissors up. He cut the string and closed his eyes.

He felt nothing. Opening his eyes, Justin found that he was not covered in slime. Some in the audience applauded, which brought a smile to the male model's face. He then walked proudly to the side of the stage to join those who would not be competing.

"And Justin is safe!" Chris announced. "He will join the girls, DJ, and Cody in not having to compete in this week's challenge. Way to go, my man. It's your turn, Noah."

Noah adopted the same nonchalant approach that Duncan had. He brought the scissors up and cut the string. He crossed his arms and would let whatever happened to happen.

Which ended up becoming nothing. The audience let out a sigh of relief, although there was quite the screaming cheer that came from Katie and Sadie at the side of the stage.

"Well, what do you know," Chris said with a chuckle. "Noah is safe! He joins the girls, DJ, Cody, and Justin in not having to compete in this week's challenge." The egghead made his way off the stage only to find himself being pounced to the ground by his girlfriend Katie. The seemingly romantic sight of which caused many in the audience to cheer. Chris looked far from pleased. "Right. Any way, Owen is up."

The big guy rubbed his hands together and licked his lips. No doubt it appeared as though he actually wanted to eat the slime that may be in the bucket above. He cut the string and set himself up for the slime to fall into his mouth.

Only there was no slime for him to eat. He opened his eyes upon hearing the applauds. Realizing what had just happened, he let out a rather sad sigh at what he felt was a sense of misfortune.

"Sorry, dude," Chris said. "Guess you won't be having any slime. Take comfort, though, in that you are safe from this week's challenge along with the girls, DJ, Cody, Justin, and Noah." Chris then looked over and watched in annoyance as Izzy suddenly was descending from the rafters, cackling as she went, holding a bucket of slime in one hand. She landed on Owen's shoulder and proceeded to dump the contents into her happy boyfriend's mouth. "Okay... We're down to our last two. Trent, you're up."

The music man took a deep breath, but was otherwise relaxed as he brought the scissors up to the string of his choice. He then cut the string and waited for whatever was to happen happen.

He flinched a bit as he found himself doused in slime. The audience screamed in reaction to what they saw. Gwen snapped her fingers and sighed. Trent merely sighed at his misfortune, but then simply shrugged.

"Oh, bad luck, Trent," Chris commented. "Looks like you'll be joining Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, and Harold in competing in this week's challenge. And last, but not least, it's Tyler's turn."

The jock took a number of deep breaths, as if he was pumping himself up for a big challenge. He then brought the scissors up to the string of his choice and then cut it. He braced himself.

When nothing happened, he jumped up in victory as the audience applauded his good luck. Lindsay was also jumping in joy as her boyfriend came running toward her for what would certainly have been a celebratory hug. Only he slipped on patches of slime that were about and nearly knocked himself out falling on his back.

"Ouch!" Chris said with a chuckle. "That had to hurt! Luckily, he should be fine. Even more fine since he'll be with Lindsay as well as the other girls, DJ, Cody, Justin, Noah, and Owen in not having to compete. And so we complete Russian Roulette with five boys who will partake in this week's challenge! Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, and Trent are in for a doozy. Because they will have to wake tomorrow morning and complete in a special off-campus challenge that will run... for twenty-four hours!"

The audience gasped and cheered in awe at the announcement. Duncan was livid, Harold complained, Trent and Geoff merely sighed and resigned themselves to their fate. Ezekiel shuttered for a moment before fainting.

"That's right, a twenty-four hour challenge off-campus for our five unlucky contestants," Chris announced. "What will they be facing? Can they make it through with their sanity in tact? Find out next time on... TOTAL... DRAMA... ACADEMY!"

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, 9 Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

Took a bit of a break from _Total Drama_ for a bit to catch up on _Beavis and Butt-head_ and _Daria_ when the full series set of the latter was released. Brought me back to the days when MTV was actually good. My interest in _Daria_ has also been spiked, one result of which is the six-chapter story I'm in the middle of writing called **Morgendorffer**, which is a crossover with _Blackadder_. Check it out when you guys get the chance.

During my hiatus, the first episode of _Total Drama World Tour_ aired. Resulting in some neat little things I hope to play with down the road. However, I also discovered something else during my hiatus that is the primary basis and inspiration for the challenge Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, and Trent will be competing in. I will explain a little more about it in the next chapter, but know that this challenge will take up many chapters. But I feel it will be worth it.

In the meantime, **keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** The Twenty-Four Hour Off-Campus Challenge Begins!


	23. Week 8, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Three

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Welcome to a very special edition of Total Drama Academy!

One of our most basic human emotions is to laugh. What if that was taken away from you?

Five unlucky teenagers will be finding out just how hard it is not to laugh in this unique challenge. Unbeknownst to them, they were be competing in a special unique game where they will be working at a hospital for twenty-four hours. But it's unlike any hospital known to man. The goal for these kids is to laugh as little as possible throughout the twenty-four period. Our goal will be doing all that we can to make them laugh.

You will not believe the celebrities we managed to get to make cameos in support of the cause. A storm of agonizing screams that will be made. The outbursts of suppressed laughter. Maybe even the collapse of from friendships. Shiver in terror when they find out what happens inside the hospital at night. Witness the unpredictable traps we have set up that will send those kids straight into the Hell of Laughter.

Stand by as Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, and Trent compete in what will surely become an instant classic!

Presenting the Total Drama Academy Penalty Game...

_NO LAUGHING IN THIS HOSPITAL FOR TWENTY-FOUR HOURS!_

* * *

**(Week 8, Day 1 - Saturday)**

**(9:00 am)**

The bus arrived at its destination and came to a complete stop. The door opened for the five passengers to exit. As soon as they stepped off, the bus immediately took off. Leaving the unlucky teens to tackle the unknown on their own. They were not in Kansas any more, rather they were nowhere near Richmore Academy. And the day seemed to have started off rather gloriously.

"Whoa!" Geoff called out in a shiver. "That's cold, bra."

"It's fall season in Canada," Duncan noted, himself shivering. "Of course it's gonna be cold."

"Yeah, but it's completely freezing out here," Harold noted.

"What are we g'oona d'oo, eh?" Ezekiel asked in a worrisome tone.

"Your guess is as good as mine, Zeke," Trent answered.

"Think we're supposed to wait over there," Duncan noted as he spotted a sign. The five teens made their way over to it and read its all too clear message. Simply written down was 'Wait here!'

"I wonder why they want us to wait right here," Harold said curiously.

"Beats me," Duncan responded with a shrug. "In front of a hospital of all places."

"Hey!" a voice called out from a nearby hill. The boys looked over to see someone appear in the distance. "Hey, guys!" As the figure appeared to be getting closer, they could see that it was a female with violet colored hair, tarnish colored skin, wearing a pink nurses uniform with navy blue sweater, and was reading a bicycle. One that she was apparently having trouble stopping. "Whoa! I can't stop! Help!" The girl panic as she cluelessly tried to stop the bicycle before finally discovering the breaks just before she could nearly crash into the boys. "Whew! That sure was a close call. I could have been hospitalized." She then started to giggle, which she had a hard time suppressing.

The five teens looked at one another with questionable glances. "It wasn't really that funny," Harold commented.

The girl apparently did not hear what had been said before she finally found her composure after taking a number of deep breaths. "I'll be your advisor," she announced. "My name is Sierra!"

Only Ezekiel appeared to not know who this girl was. The others seemed painfully familiar with her. "Aren't you that one girl who's been following us around and writing about us on that blog of yours?" Harold asked. "How come you get to be our advisor?"

"Chris thought it would be a fun idea," Sierra answered the latter question in a highly excited tone. She went on to completely ignore the first question by asking one of her own. "So any way, what do you guys think of Florence Nightingale?"

The five boys looked at one another again, only the glances were that of concern. "Um..." Harold managed to utter. "No doubt she was a great person as many of us have learned."

Sierra suddenly burst into a strange mixture of giggles and squeals that took her moment to calm down from. "Sorry," she said. "I am so LOL right now! It's just so exciting that I get to be with you guys! It's too bad Cody is not among you five." She started taking a few more deep breaths. During which, the five boys were now looking at one another with nervous glances. Once she had regained her composure, Sierra brought their attention to the hospital they were standing in front of. "So, here's where you will be working. The Pythonicus Lackluster Memorial Hospital!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "Our five looo-sers must not laugh at the Pythonicus Lackluster Memorial Hospital. Laughter over the lives of patients at this hospital? Can they fend off the attackers for twenty-four hours?"

* * *

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Sierra practically cried. She was then pointing in a frantic motion to the opposite side of the street. "You guys need to change. There's the fitting room. So put on your uniforms!"

The five teen boys looked over to see changing booths across the street. With shrugs and sighs, the boys made their way over and each entered a booth with their names listed upon them.

"Let me know when you're ready!" Sierra called out in-between girlish giggles and squirms.

Most of the boys grumbled and groaned as they began putting on their uniforms. They were far from comfortable with what they were going to have to wear for a good chunk of twenty-four hours. Though they would not be surprised if they were to hear later on that they would indeed be wearing them for the full twenty-four hours.

"Are you guys ready?" Sierra asked in a singing song voice.

"Yes," the boys grumbled.

"Okay," Sierra squealed. "I'm gonna call you out one by one. Ezekiel!"

Ezekiel slowly stepped out. He looked quite embarrassed and was shuttering while wearing the exact same pink nurses uniform that Sierra was wearing. The same color pink that was starting to form on his cheeks.

"You look so cute!" Sierra giggled, which only increased the intensity of Ezekiel's blushing. "Okay, Trent! You're up."

Trent stepped out. He seemed not to mind all that much about wearing the nurses uniform. As a matter fact, he thought the idea was pretty funny and was himself chuckling. He also seemed to have an added bonus of a bag to carry.

"Wow," Sierra swooned. "Even in a dress you're handsome. I'm so jealous of Gwen." She started to giggle again while Trent merely shrugged at the statement. "Your turn, Geoff!"

Geoff stepped out. Of the three presented, he was the only one who actually looked as though he could pass off as a normal nurse. This was despite his toned body frame, of course. He also was the only one of the boys so far without fake boobs.

"You'd make a good nurse for sure," Sierra stated in an excited voice. "Come on out, Harold!"

"Do I have to?" Harold asked from behind his booth.

"The rest of us are out here, bra," Geoff noted. "Nothing to be ashamed of."

"Okay," Harold said with a sigh. He stepped out. Like most of the others, he was dressed in the same pink nurses uniform with the navy blue sweater and a pair of fake boobs. But there was something the others took note that hand them laughing.

"Nice legs," Trent said through his chuckles.

"Shut up, guys," Harold demanded. "Gosh!"

"Now let's see Duncan!" Sierra declared.

"Forget it," Duncan said from behind his booth.

"Aww, come on," Sierra begged. "It's not like you're the only one looking like a nurse here."

"I highly doubt nurses are supposed to look like this," Duncan stated. Then came a defeated sigh before he stepped out. His appearance had the other boys clutching their stomachs in laughter while Sierra was giggling and swooning at the same time.

"Oh, wow!" Sierra gasped. "You look rather sexy! I bet Courtney would say the same."

"Okay, now I'm freakin' cold here," Duncan grumbled as he stated to shiver again.

"Where are your socks?" Harold asked through his laughter.

Duncan looked confused. Then he looked down at the way the others dressed and compared it to the way he was dressed. The results left him livid. "What the hell!" he yelled. Aside from not having socks, he also had a bigger pair of fake boobs. But more importantly, he had a much shorter skirt. Whereas the others had theirs below the knees, his was above.

"That's kinda perverted, if you ask me," Trent commented as he chuckled.

"Alright, guys," Sierra announced. "Let's get going!"

"How come I don't have socks?" Duncan asked in a demanding voice. It went ignored.

"This way, please," Sierra said as they led the five back across the street. "Watch out for cars." They all stopped before the open gate area of the hospital. "Okay, I have to explain the rules for this. First rule, work as nurses for twenty-four hours. Second rule, do not laugh while at the hospital. Third rule, severe punishment upon breaking the second rule. Your work begins once you cross the gate."

"This is gonna be a long day, isn't it?" Harold asked in nervousness.

"I d'oon't like the s'oond of this," Ezekiel said, continuing to shutter and blush.

"Come on, dudes," Geoff said in an attempt to cheer everyone up. "It might actually be fun."

"Can we hurry up?" Duncan managed to utter. "I'm getting cold here."

"I hope you don't say you're cold and stuff once we're inside," Harold complained.

"Why are y'oo cr'oosin' yer legs like that?" Ezekiel asked. The other guys noticed and started laughing at Duncan. Pointing down for him to see that he was crossing his legs like a girl would.

"Are you trying to make us laugh right from the start?" Trent asked.

"At least you guys have socks on," Duncan stated. "I got nothing to keep me worm." Duncan messed around with his skirt, both failing miserably to cover up his crossed legs and to worm up. It was during this struggle that the other guys caught sight of something that made them scream nearly in horror.

"What is that, eh?" Ezekiel asked in a scared voice.

"Dude, why are you wearing a garter belt?" Geoff added, who along with Trent and Harold were now laughing in complete and utter disbelief. Hearing this question made Duncan groan, realizing that there was something else about his uniform that was different from the others. And he did not like it one bit.

"You would wear just about anything, wouldn't you?" Harold asked.

"You think I'm enjoying this?" Duncan yelled.

"Alright, guys!" Sierra stated. She had been giggling throughout the entire exchange and managed to take numerous deep breaths to calm herself. "Once you cross the gate, the game begins. On the count of three." The boys lined up at the gate line, grumbling to get the whole thing over with. "One... two... three!"

The five boys stepped over the line and the challenge had officially begun.

"Here we go, bras," Geoff said.

"Let the suffering begin," Duncan muttered.

"I think it already has," Trent pointed out.

"That's a big h'oospital," Ezekiel said in awe as they made their way toward the actual hospital building.

"Almost too grand, I'd say," Harold said.

"Wait, guys," Sierra stated. She made the boys stop and pointed toward an incoming vehicle. It was also then that they all heard sirens approaching. "Look! An ambulance is coming. Let's move over here."

They all moved over as the ambulance truck came a stop in front of the building. They watched with interest as paramedics swiftly stepped out of the back and pulled out a patient on a stretcher. Then someone else stepped out. Someone most of the boys were familiar with. Causing them to chuckle in awe.

"Monica!" the familiar figure cried over the patient. "Monica!"

"Is that who I think it is?" Harold whispered.

"Yeah, bra," Geoff answered. "That's Vincent Cassel."

"You know what that means," Trent stated.

"That's Monica Bellucci on the stretcher," Duncan pointed out.

A doctor came rushing out of the hospital and stopped at the stretcher. "What's her status?" he asked.

"Cardiopulmonary arrest, sir," one of the paramedics answered.

The doctor then quite suddenly jumped onto the stretcher, a sight that made the boys laugh. They laughed some more as the doctor then began to give an apparently unconscious Monica Bellucci CPR.

"Monica!" the doctor cried as the paramedics began pushing the stretcher into the hospital while still giving her CPR. A worried Vincent Cassel followed right with them. "MONICA!" The boys kept laughing at the ridiculousness of the scene just before it disappeared into the hospital. "_MO-NI-CA!_"

"Oh my God, dudes," Geoff stated to say through the overwhelming laughter. "That was really them!"

The boys continued to laugh until a short piece of music was heard mysteriously. It was followed by the familiar voice of Chris McLean making an announcement. "All out!" he said.

Suddenly, five figures began running up to them. They were wearing black nurses uniforms with their mouths covered like ninjas and wielding blunt instruments. They forced the boys to bend over and then one at a time started whacking them very hard in the behind, causing all of them to yelp in pain, before just as swiftly disappearing.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "There is a fourth rule. A swift slap to the butt from the Nurses in Black using not so soft weapons of ass destruction."

* * *

"That was really unfair," Harold complained as he, like the others, rubbed his behind in an effort to alleviate the pain suffered.

"Seriously!" Geoff agreed.

"Not cool at all," Trent simply stated before taking a deep breath through his teeth.

After a moment, they felt a little better. "That was s'oome scream th'oo," Ezekiel said in reflection of the earlier scene.

"Man, it's already not fair," Duncan noted. The boys then followed Sierra up the steps.

"Okay, here's a bronze statue of our first hospital trustee!" the advisor stated, directing them over to a bust that appeared near the front doors of the building.

The boys took a close look and noted that the face definitely belonged to that of Chef Hatchet. Despite the pathetic looking smile on his face, as well as the goofy get up he was apparently wearing, there was no doubting the features.

"I see..." Duncan muttered. None of the boys looked as though they were about to laugh any time soon.

"Oh, look," Sierra cried. She pointed over to something that was across a grassy lawn covered in leaves near the building entrance. "That sign over there needs to be turned around. Say Trent, why don't you fix that real quick."

"Me?" Trent asked, pointing to himself.

"Yes, you," Sierra answered in an excited tone. "You better hurry up. Run for it."

Trent looked at the others and then shrugged. He began jogging toward the sign, going over the grassy lawn covered in leaves. All of a sudden, before the others could actually register what they were seeing, Trent swiftly dropped and vanished out of sight. After a quick second to realize that something had happened, the other four boys began to all laugh. Trent had fallen into a well disguised boobie trap just before the sign.

The mysterious short piece of music was then heard. "Duncan, Harold, Ezekiel, Geoff out!" Chris announced.

"This isn't right!" Harold complained as the Nurses in Black swiftly approached them. "This is not what I was expecting! This is the wrong way to get a laugh!"

All complaints were rendered useless as the four were individually given severe whacks to the bottom, half yelping in pain while the other half actually screamed. Once the Nurses in Black disappeared, the boys started to slowly approach the newly formed pit.

"Seriously!" Geoff cried. "Is Trent even alright?"

"I sure didn't see that coming," Duncan noted as they hovered over the pit, looking down as Trent shook himself to regain his barrings and figure out what just happened to him.

"I was trying not to look at the sign because I thought something on it would make me laugh," Harold stated, still in shock of what occurred. "And when I looked, Trent had vanished!"

"Dude, you completely disappeared!" Geoff called down to Trent.

"Can y'oo get 'oot?" Ezekiel asked. He then helped Geoff grab one of Trent's hands and pulled him out.

"Got it," Trent muttered once he was out of the pit. Once he was on proper ground, he took a minute to catch his breath. The five boys then looked back down to examine the pit.

"Look at this," Sierra called out to the guys. The looked over and watched as she turned the sign around for them to see a clear message written. "The sign says, '_Watch out for the pit!_'" The boys stared at the sign in utter disbelief for a moment.

"This isn't funny, bra," Geoff said.

"Isn't this a criminal act, eh?" Ezekiel asked.

"It should totally be criminal," Harold stated.

"They hid the h'oole with leaves and everythin'," Ezekiel added.

"You had no idea, didn't you?" Duncan asked Trent.

"Zero idea," Trent answered as he brushed off some of the dirt that was on him.

"The way you fell was not normal," Duncan explained. "You just disappeared. Poof!"

"Pretty crazy..." Trent muttered.

Everyone then just stood still in awkward silence. The moment kept going. The recognition of this caused most of the boys to start chuckling. As a result, the mysterious short music piece sounded.

"Duncan, Harold, Trent, Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"Wait a minute!" Harold cried as the Nurses in Black ran up to them rather suddenly and swiftly. "What the heck are we hanging around here for? What is this awkward pause?"

With little choice, the four were forced to bend over and receive their whacks Trent did not make a noise, still reeling a little from what he had happened to him, while Ezekiel and Duncan yelped. Harold screamed in pain before the Nurses in Black disappeared.

"Why the awkward pause?" Harold asked in complaint. "What's this awkwardness of us standing around the pit?"

"Okay, let's get going!" Sierra announced. She led the five bewildered boys into the hospital through the front doors.

"That was something else, bra," Geoff commented.

"L'ook at all this," Ezekiel said, looking about the front lobby of the hospital.

"The producers must have spent big bucks for this," Trent noted.

"Come this way, guys," Sierra said. "Over here." She led them to the front reception desk in the lobby. "Let me introduce to you our receptionist. Ms. Eva!"

The boys did their best not to laugh as they saw the unmistakable appearance of Eva sitting behind the desk. She looked completely unhappy at having to be there.

"Guess I'll give you a little tidbit about this hospital," Eva grunted. "So this place is called the Lackluster Hospital." She then suddenly reached down and threw a handful of peanuts onto the desk. She popped one into her mouth and continued speaking while chewing. "You know what it's called '_Lackluster_?' You've heard about our first trustee? Heard he was a bit of a bore." She then quickly turned her head to the side and spit out the shells before popping another peanut into her mouth. "Guess that's how we got the name '_Lackluster_.'" She again turned and spit out shells, this time doing so twice.

Sierra giggled, which in turn caused Duncan to chuckle. This resulted in the now familiar music to play.

"Duncan out!" Chris announced.

"Don't be laughing, Sierra!" Duncan yelled.

"Yeah, gosh!" Harold agreed. "She shouldn't be laughing."

"Sorry," Sierra apologized as she watched a Nurse in Black force Duncan to bend over. "I can't help it. It's just so funny."

Duncan received the swift and hard whack to the bottom, causing him to yelp. The Nurse in Black disappeared just as quickly as Duncan walked around a little in an attempt to alleviate the pain.

"Hey!" Eva called, bringing the attention back to her. She then popped another peanut into her mouth. "Listen up. Dr. Hatchet was apparently a pretty good doctor, too. And as this hospital became..." She turned her head and faked an attempt at a spit before putting another peanut into her mouth. She continued to talk and chew, causing her words to be muddled. Which resulted in Ezekiel chuckling at what he was seeing. Then the music played.

"Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"This is g'oona be a l'oong day, eh," Ezekiel whimpered as the Nurse in Black got him into position. The whack caused Ezekiel to scream in pain as the Nurse in Black quickly disappeared again.

"Did you guys get all that?" Eva managed to ask through all the peanuts in her mouth.

"Yes?" Geoff managed to say.

Sierra thanked Eva and then led the boys out of the lobby and into the main hallway. Eva snorted a light laugh before cleaning off whatever remaining peanuts were on her desk.

"I didn't get a word she said," Trent whispered in the hallway.

"No idea, bra," Geoff said in response.

"Inside is pretty big, t'oo," Ezekiel said in awe as he got a good look at his surroundings.

"Do you think they're open?" Harold asked, nodding his head to many of the doors they passed.

"I think they are," Sierra replied.

"Where are the patients?" Duncan asked.

There was no answer when a series of chimes sounded in the overhead speakers, causing the six of them to stop. It was apparent that an announcement was about to be made.

"Please stand as the doctor of internal medicine makes his rounds," a voice announced. The boys were pretty sure that the announcer sounded very much like Jessica. This was then followed, for whatever reason, by dramatic music being played.

They watched as a series of doctors and nurses turned and corner and were walking toward them. Sierra directed the boys to stand aside so that they could pass. Only the doctors and nurses stopped just right in front of them. At the head of the group was no doubt the doctor of internal medicine. Getting a good look, some of the boys started to laugh with familiarity.

The doctor of internal medicine was Leslie Nielsen.

"And the status of the patient in room 205?" Dr. Nielsen asked one of his accompanying doctors.

"Stable, sir," the accompanying doctor replied. He handed Dr. Nielsen an x-ray. "His numbers are showing progress."

As the conversation was going on, Harold was doing his best to keep a straight face while the others were laughing and chuckling. It was then that he noticed that there was another familiar face within the group. Upon recognizing the face, he could not help himself but laugh with utter disbelief.

Looking over Dr. Nielsen's shoulder was Harold's older brother, trying to appear all professional like.

"I had no idea my brother was here," Harold whispered to the others. This only caused the five of them to laugh even more.

"... and this was proven at a medical conference in the States," Dr. Nielsen concluded. "The rest is up to the patient's will to recover." He then continued with his rounds, leading the group out of the hallway and turning another corner.

"Your brother has nothing to do with this," Duncan noted through his chuckles. Then the familiar music piece sounded.

"All out!" Chris announced. The boys all groaned, Harold in particular, as the Nurses in Black approached.

"He had a cool cap on," Trent commented before they were forced into position. All five yelped when they received their whacks

"I almost lost it when I saw Leslie Nielsen," Harold noted as they all tried to relax.

"Great character for sure," Sierra giggled. "Let's move on, guys." She led them down toward a door at the end of the hallway.

"I wish he'd said s'oomethin', eh," Ezekiel said.

"It's this way to the Hospital Director's office," Sierra announced at the door. "Don't forget to introduce yourselves." She knocked on the door and then opened it. "Sir? Excuse us!" She led the five boys into the room, where they found that it was empty save for a sofa, a few chairs, a chalk board, a sink, and for some reason a tanning bed.

"Hmmm..." Sierra mused as she looked around the room. "I wonder where he is."

Suddenly, the tanning bed began to open. They also began to hear "_Also Sprach Zarathustra, op. 30_" playing. As though someone of great importance was about to appear. The boys looked on with great anticipation to find that someone was indeed in the tanning bed. The figure slipped over into a sitting position to present himself.

The Hospital Director was William Shatner.

Everyone busted out laughing in awe, resulting in the familiar music piece to sound.

"All out!" Chris announced.

"How did we get him?" Harold asked in awe as the Nurses in Black swiftly entered the room.

Director Shatner watched with an amused chuckle as the five boys received their whacks, all of them yelping in pain. Although Harold screamed upon receiving his. Once the Nurses in Black disappeared, Director Shatner clapped.

"Thank you for coming," he said. He got to his feet as the boys immediately stood in a line at attention. "I'm the director of this hospital, William Shatner." Then came the signature pause. He was about to move on when Harold laughed hysterically, causing the familiar music piece to sound.

"Harold out!" Chris announced.

Harold tried to calm his laughter before a Nurse in Black came in, forced him into position, and whacked him in the bottom before leaving just as quickly. Harold screamed in pain and then returned to stand at attention.

"Director," Harold tried to say very quietly. "Please spare me from your awkward pauses."

"Welcome!" Director Shatner proclaimed. He then proceeded to give Duncan a hug, which threw the punk completely off guard. Shatner then gave Harold a hug, who was more than happy to give one in return. He stopped at Ezekiel and brought his hand out, as if to ask for his name.

"Oh!" Ezekiel squeaked in realization. "I'm Ezekiel." Shatner nodded and gave the surprised prairie boy a hug. Ezekiel nervously gave one in return. He stopped at Trent and did the same.

"I'm Trent," Trent said. Shatner nodded and gave the music man a hug, who gave one in return as well.

"Thank you so much for coming," Director Shatner stated. As he turned away, the boys immediately realized that Geoff did not get a hug and was ignored. Geoff seemed saddened by this sudden turn of events, although he was like the others in trying desperately not to laugh about it. "Any how, we all know that our health and safety is the number one priority. With that in mind, I'm giving each one of you a physical. Spread your feet to about shoulder length." The boys did as they were told. "Stand up straight." Shatner then approached Duncan. "Excuse me."

Despite being told that they were having a physical right then and there, Duncan yelped when William Shatner of all people was indeed proceeding forward. The feeling caused his eyes to shoot open in shock. He then turned to look at the equally surprised Harold and they both started to laugh uncontrollably. This resulted in the familiar music piece to sound.

"Duncan, Harold out!" Chris announced.

"What just happened?" Ezekiel asked in shocked confusion as the Nurses in Black entered the room.

"That wasn't right!" Duncan complained though his laughter. "This is ridicules!" He was forced into position along with Harold as they received their whacks They both yelped in pain as the Nurses in Black disappeared.

"Part your legs," Director Shatner announced. Harold found himself completely off guard when he received his physical. Once the feeling was registered, he couldn't help but laugh. Duncan did the same, resulting in the music piece to sound.

"Duncan, Harold out!" Chris announced.

Harold and Duncan positioned themselves as the Nurses in Black came in. The whacks were made and the Nurses disappeared just was quickly. Harold and Duncan had yelped in pain.

"Well, I guess you guys are in good health," Director Shatner proclaimed. The boys noticed that he was no longer proceeding further with the physicals, meaning that Ezekiel, Trent, and Geoff had seemingly lucked out. Only this realization caused Ezekiel and Geoff to laugh, resulting in the music piece to sound.

"Ezekiel, Geoff out!" Chris announced.

The Nurses in Black came in, whacked Ezekiel and Geoff, and disappeared just as swiftly. Ezekiel and Geoff had yelped in pain with Ezekiel moaning behind his hands, which he had brought up to cover his mouth. The boys returned to standing at attention in a line before Director Shatner.

"As you start your new career here, there will be some questions and issues," Director Shatner stated. "Don't hesitate to shoot me an e-mail." He reached into his pocket to pull out a card. "Here's my e-mail address. It's very easy to remember." He cleared his throat and read from the card. "_William-Shatner-dot-Star-Trek-hyphen-Hollywood_..." He then suddenly gave out a rather pregnant pause. "... _Hollywood-Actor_. That is all."

Harold couldn't help himself but chuckle from hearing the ridiculousness of the so-called e-mail address coupled with the acting performance that he knew so well from William Shatner. This, of course, resulted in the music piece to play.

"Harold out!" Chris announced.

Harold took his position as the Nurse in Black came in. He started to let out yelps, as though it would help in softening the blow. It did not as the yelp that came after the whack was a lot louder and more painful than the others. He walked around a bit after the Nurse in Black disappeared before returning to his place in line.

"Good job!" Director Shatner proclaimed. "You're dismissed."

"Thank you, sir!" the five boys said.

"Are we good to go?" Sierra asked. After receiving a nod from Director Shatner, she led the boys out of the room.

"Thanks again!" the boys said before the door was closed. Sierra then led them back down the hallway.

"I think you got dissed, Geoff," Harold said to Geoff.

"Really," Duncan added. "You got no hug."

"Well," Geoff started to say in response. "You two laugh too much, dudes."

"Did you just laugh?" Harold asked Duncan as Sierra brought them to a set of stairs.

"Hell no!" Duncan replied. "Don't be starting that." Just was they were about to go up the stairs, Duncan ran in front of the others and showed off his garter belt. Harold and Geoff immediately started laughing while Trent tried to cover the sight with his hand. Ezekiel was oblivious to what happened when the music piece played.

"Harold, Geoff out!" Chris announced.

Duncan continued to show off his garter belt until the Nurses in Black came to give Harold and Geoff their whacks By this point, Ezekiel now knew what had happened and followed Trent in using his hand to block the sight. Harold and Geoff yelped after receiving their hits and the Nurses disappeared.

"Let's not do that again, okay?" Harold said as they made their way up the stairs.

"C'ood y'oo try n'oot t'oo bend 'oover t'oo m'ooch s'oo that thin' d'oosn't sh'oo, please?" Ezekiel asked. Unfortunately for them, the others tried to push it.

"Did you always have such nice legs?" Trent teased.

"My ankles are perky, too," Geoff noted. All of the boys threw their hands up to block the sight of Duncan continuing to show off his garter belt from the back side until they got to the second floor.

"So, over here will be your assigned station," Sierra said as she led them through the hallway into a work station. "You will all be working together in there." The boys took a good look at their work station. A reception desk set up for them to receive patients and behind there was their break room. Which was where Sierra took them.

"I still can't get warm around here," Duncan grumbled. "Are there any other nurses around?"

"Yes, they're here," Sierra replied. Though it was apparent she was not going to explain her answer any further than she had, which was not much at all. Likely because that was she was told to do by the production crew. "Come this way, guys."

"Look at this set up, bras," Geoff mused as he looked around the work station further, taking note of a big open space between the reception desk and the break room with numerous files and books placed against the walls.

"Are we g'oona be 'ookay here?" Ezekiel asked curiously before Sierra opened the door and led the boys into the break room.

"So, find your name and sit down," Sierra said.

The boys began to file in one by one. They sighed in relief from the first thing they noticed about the break room. "Nice and warm in here," Duncan said. The boys continued to look around, noticing how nice the room looked. They then saw a series of desks that were pushed together in the middle of the room.

"Have a seat, guys!" Sierra said. "Look for your names."

"I found mine," Trent called, finding his seat at one end of the table. The boys continued to look for their names on the desk. Geoff found his on the opposite side of Trent. To one side was where the other three would sit with Ezekiel sitting near Geoff and Harold sitting at the middle.

"Hurry, please," Sierra said. "Have a seat."

While the others were sitting down and exhaling in relaxation, Duncan was rather hesitant to do so. He merely stood near a corner and took another look around the room. "I see lots of cameras around," he muttered quietly. Finally, he gave a sigh and took his seat between Harold and Trent.

"Is everyone in their seats?" Sierra asked.

All, except Duncan, muttered that they were. Then they all took a good look at Duncan. They noticed that he appeared to be sitting much lower than the rest of them. They then dared to get a closer look and see why. With a scowl on his face, Duncan was sitting on a baby rocking horse. The others immediately looked away or closed their eyes, contorting their mouths and scratching their chins in an effort to keep from laughing.

"Hey Duncan," Sierra said as she started to giggle. "That looks like fun."

"Not really," Duncan grumbled in response.

"Sure it does," Sierra said, still giggling. "I think you may be having a bit too much fun." The others kept looking away, knowing exactly what she meant. Despite his dislike for his present situation, Duncan was rocking back and forth in the rocker. Sierra continued in her giggling fit until she regained her composure and gave each boy a small sheet of paper. "Okay, so I'm gonna have each of you spit out some of the rules of this hospital. And I think it would be fun if you guys did so to the beat of some music."

"What?" Harold asked with a curious brow raised.

"What do you guys say to instead of some boring reading you guys rap to lighten things up a little?" Sierra asked in an excited tone while finishing up handing each a sheet of paper. "Here are some lyrics."

"Rap?" Harold asked further as the boys looked down at the sheets of paper they were each handed.

"Yes, rap," Sierra replied. "Are we ready? Okay, start the music!" A generic sounding rap beat started playing, which left the five boys looking quite bewildered. Than Sierra started to rap. Or rather made an attempt to rap.

_"Yo, yo!  
I'm the advisor, Sierra,  
I'm the happiest rapper in the hospital,  
Why don't you nurses let me hear you rap!"_

"MC Trent!" Sierra than announced. "Tell us all about the hours of operation. Here we go!" Trent looked at the words on his sheet of paper. Then looked up at Sierra with a confused look. Then back down at the paper. He gave a shrug and started rapping to the beat as best as he could. He may have been a musician, but he was no rapper.

_"Yo, yo!  
I'm MC Trent,  
Born in Windsor, a perverted rapper,  
Hours of operation are eight to five,  
Unless of course, you have an emergency,  
Then we be makings lots of dough."_

"Okay, okay," Sierra cheered and clapped. "How about MC Zeke? Let's hear about our insurance policy. Here we go!"

Nervously, Ezekiel looked down at the sheet of paper he had. Having been vaguely familiar with rap only recently, he ended up simply saying the words and not rapping to the beat. "Y'oo, y'oo!" he said. "I'm MC Zeke. Call me a feeble and ign'oorant rapper. First time here, 'oor back again? Kn'oo wh'oo's int'oo fishin'? C'oolin M'oocarie. First check-up 'oor m'oonthly check-up. N'oo ins'oorance, y'oo're g'ooin' t'oo hell."

"No, no," Sierra said, shaking her head. "Zeke, you gotta do it again. Stand up this time." As Ezekiel stood, the others gave him pointers as quickly as they could about rapping. "MC Zeke, here we go!" Ezekiel cleared his throat and made an attempt to rap.

_"Y'oo, y'oo!  
I'm MC Zeke,  
Call me a feeble and ign'oorant rapper,  
First time here, 'oor back again?  
Kn'oo wh'oo's int'oo fishin'? C'oolin M'oocarie,  
First check-up 'oor m'oonthly check-up,  
N'oo ins'oorance, y'oo're g'ooin' t'oo hell."_

All of a sudden, the music stopped. A familiar short music piece sounded. Everyone looked to find Duncan leaning as far back as he was willing in the baby horse rocker, chuckling.

"Duncan out!" Chris announced.

"What does all this mean?" Harold asked in regards to the lyrics. While waiting for an answer, a Nurse in Black slipped in, gave Duncan a whack to his bottom, and disappeared. Duncan yelped in pain and began rubbing his bottom, doing so in a way that showed off his garter belt to the others. "What's it mean?" Harold kept asking, ignoring what Duncan was doing.

"Let's move on, guys," Sierra said through giggles. "Start the music!" The rap beat returned while Duncan finally sat himself back down on the baby horse rocker. "Okay, how about MC Geoff? Tell us about the vising hours. Here we go!" Geoff looked at the words on his sheet of paper, shrugged, and rapped as best as he could.

_"Yo, yo!  
I'm MC Geoff,  
I am a hairy and filthy rapper,  
Visiting time is from nine to six,  
Everyone is happy, like it's party time,  
We welcome all your family and friends,  
Especially those from St. Catherines."_

"Okay!" Sierra cheered. "Let's move on to MC H-Bomb." The boys looked around in confusion until they figured that she was referring to Harold. "Tell us about our smoking policy. Here we go!" Harold looked at the words on his sheet of paper, gave out a sigh, and started rapping. Of the five boys, he was probably the one who could do rap the best.

_"Yo, yo!  
I'm MC H-Bomb,  
Can't get married, a lonely rapper,  
Smoking is only allowed in designated areas,  
Hold your ashtray in one hand, you'll look cool,  
If I catch you smoking any where else,  
I'll beat you up, bad boy."_

"Okay!" Sierra cheered. "MC Duncan, you ready?" Duncan rolled his eyes and sighed. He was waiting for Sierra to give him his cue when they noticed that Sierra started to stumble. As though she could not remember what it was that Duncan would be rapping about. "Um... Let's see... Well... Um... Okay, okay..." This caused Ezekiel to start laughing, which resulted in a familiar short music piece to be heard.

"Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"Y'oo d'oon't remember anyt'in', d'oo y'oo?" Ezekiel noted to the giggling Sierra as a Nurse of Black entered and forced him into position. "H'oo d'oo y'oo guys n'oot laugh at that, eh?" He yelped upon getting whacked in the bottom. He sat back down shortly after the Nurse in Black disappeared.

"Okay!" Sierra said once everything had calmed down. "Start the music!" The rap beat resumed as she turned to Duncan, this time remembering what he was to rap about. "Tell us about cell phone policy. Here we go!" Duncan rolled his eyes, looked down at the sheet of paper, and started to rap.

_"Yo, yo!  
I'm MC Duncan,  
I got fat lips and I'm a greedy rapper,  
Don't use a cell phone in the hospital,  
Sensitive machines are everywhere,  
Radio waves can mess up the machines,  
So show my lips some respect."_

"Okay!" Sierra cheered once more as the rap music started to fade away. She exhaled a breath of air and looked at the five boys seated. "That definitely lifted our spirits! Let's keep this up! We'll take a little break. Good job!" She waved at them before turning and exiting the break room to leave the boys alone.

"It's going to be a long day," Harold said as the boys got more relaxed in their seats and exhaled sighs of relief. "What time is it?"

"I don't think you should be asking that, bra," Geoff replied, shaking his head. The rest of the boys rolled their eyes and sighed. Knowing full well that they would not be given the luxury of knowing the time in this challenge.

"I got a lot of dirt in my head," Trent muttered as he began brushing his hair.

"Don't forget to wipe off the dirt on your shirt, too," Harold noted.

"Trent fallin' int'oo the pit was incredible," Ezekiel commented while Trent stood up and brushed himself from top to bottom.

"That was nuts, dude," Geoff added to the conversation.

"Yeah," Ezekiel agreed with a nod.

"Man, you're really filthy right now," Duncan said to Trent.

"I know," Trent managed to utter as he continued to brush himself down. Shortly thereafter, he reached into one of his pockets and pulled out a dead leaf that he dropped on the desk. After looking at it for a curious second, he brushed it off before finally sitting back down in his chair.

"Don't be looking at me thinking I would find that to be funny," Duncan stated upon seeing that Harold was staring at him after the dead leaf had been dropped on the desk. He then turned to Trent in annoyance. "Why don't you take care of your own leaf business? Why do you have to be all, 'Hey! Check me out! I found me a dead leaf!'"

"Can't you be more civil?" Harold asked.

Duncan displayed how he would be civil. He stood straight up and lifted his skirt to once again show off his garter belt. Everyone turned away as quickly as they could while Duncan moved closer to Harold. The nerd couldn't stand it and started to laugh.

"Harold out!" Chris announced.

"At least give me some funny props, too!" Harold complained as Duncan walked away and a Nurse in Black entered the room. He was forced into position and received another whack to the bottom. He screamed in pain as the Nurse quickly disappeared.

The boys then went silent for the next minute. Duncan walked around a little until he found an actual chair to sit in. Harold tapped his fingers upon the desk and noticed something about one of his drawers. It felt just a little heavy for just one of his fingers to push upward on its own.

"There's something in this drawer," Harold noted to Ezekiel.

"Why w'oodn't it?" Ezekiel asked.

"I'm sure of it," Harold said. The room became quiet again, but clearly the subject of something possibly being in the drawers was now the dominant thought on everyone's mind.

"Did y'oo l'ook in?" Ezekiel asked curiously.

"No," Harold replied as he yawned. "But I know there's something in it though."

"Oh yeah," Geoff noted, now just realizing what the others were conversing about. "The drawer."

"Why d'oon't y'oo l'ook in it, eh?" Ezekiel asked. "It's g'oona b'oog me if y'oo d'oon't." He watched as Harold merely scratched his head, thinking about whether or not to actually do it. "Can we l'ook in?"

"It's Harold's drawer," Duncan noted. "Why doesn't he open it?"

"Well..." Harold managed to say. He put his hand on the drawer only to hesitate. "It feels like there's a lot of stuff in here."

"Open it," Duncan said calmly.

Harold took a deep breath and then opened the drawer. There definitely was something in the drawer. One look caused he start laughing rather hysertically, resulting in the familiar short music piece to sound.

"Harold out!" Chris announced.

As the Nurse in Black entered, Ezekiel got a good look in the drawer. He bit his lip and looked up at Trent to keep from laughing. Seeing this, Trent stroked his chin to keep from laughing himself. Harold yelped after getting whacked by the Nurse in Black. Just as the Nurse disappeared, Ezekiel and Trent started to chuckle and causing the short music piece to sound again.

"Trent, Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"Are you serious?" Trent groaned as two more Nurses in Black entered. "I thought I made it through!" Ezekiel and Trent were forced into position before getting whacked in their respective bottoms. They both let out yelps of pain just as the Nurses disappeared quickly. They stayed on their feet to walk off the pain.

"I'm finding this to be unfair!" Harold declared, himself getting to his feet. "Why are they getting my family involved?"

"Hey, why d'oon't y'oo l'ook in?" Ezekiel asked the others.

"Really?" Trent asked sarcastically with a raised brow. "I busted out even without looking in."

"Why don't all of you look in one by one?" Harold asked the others. Duncan in particular.

"Which drawer is it?" Duncan asked as rolled the chair he was in back to the desk. "There's too many drawers here."

"I'll make it easy," Harold said with a sigh. He opened the drawer and laid out the object in question onto the desk for all to see. "Here's what I got." It was the back cover of a book. And it had a photo of a well-dressed Harold's older brother. Within seconds, Harold and Trent immediately started to laugh. The short music piece sounded.

"Harold, Trent out!" Chris announced.

Duncan sat still, his eyes closed and looking up while the Nurses in Black rushed in to force Harold and Trent into position and whack them hard in the bottom. After Harold and Trent yelped and the Nurses disappeared, Duncan decided to flip the book over to the front and tried to look away as quickly as possible. He didn't look away fast enough as he joined Harold and Trent in laughing at seeing on the front cover Harold's brother with a guitar in hand and making a goofy smile. The short music piece played.

"Duncan, Harold, Trent out!" Chris announced.

Duncan, Harold, and Trent cursed their luck as the Nurses in Black came in, forced them into position, whacked them in the bottom, and disappeared very quickly. The three yelped and then walked around to relieve the pain.

"Can I put this away?" Trent asked as all five gathered around the book.

"Did y'oo see the title?" Ezekiel asked as Trent shoved the book right back into Harold's drawer.

"The title is the killer," Harold stated. "The title is worse than the photo. '_Harold, Do You Recall These?_' I mean, why can't he say that to my face? Why go through a book?"

"Well, let me see what's in my drawer," Duncan proclaimed. He want to his desk, put his hand on the drawer, and started to psyche himself. After taking a few deep breaths, he slowly opened the drawer. The result of all of this causing him to laugh at just how ridicules he felt. For the drawer was empty. The short music piece sounded.

"Duncan out!" Chris announced.

"What the hell?" Duncan groaned. The others took a quick peek at the drawer and then turned away so that they wouldn't even chuckle. The Nurses in Black then came in, forced Duncan into position, whacked him in the bottom, and disappeared swiftly. Duncan yelped and took a deep breath through his teeth.

"I can appreciate that approach," Trent commented aloud.

"You wanna see for yourselves?" Duncan asked the others. He looked directly at Harold.

"Why do you always got to ask me?" Harold asked in complaint, feeling that Duncan was making another play to get him to laugh. "I know the drawer is empty. You don't need to look at me for the approval."

Duncan stared at the others for a moment and then proceeded to pull up his skirt. All looked away as quickly as possible. To try and distract himself, Ezekiel opened his drawer. A pen simply rolled around, but the sight of this caused Ezekiel, Geoff, and Harold to start laughing at the ridiculousness of the whole situation. The familiar short piece of music played.

"Harold, Ezekiel, Geoff out!" Chris announced.

The three moaned in suffering. The Nurses in Black came in, forced them into position, whacked them hard in the bottom, and disappeared just as quickly. The three let out yelps of pain as they walked around to relieve the suffering.

"How about you open yours, Geoff," Harold suggested.

"Okay," Geoff said with a shrug.

But just before he could, everyone noticed that Trent went ahead and opened his. The music man looked in, stared at the contents that were found, blinked, and then raised a curious brow.

"Trent?" Ezekiel asked.

Trent looked up at the others for a second and then back down at what was in his drawer. He sighed and pulled out what appeared to be a series of postcards. The rest looked and they themselves raised curious brows. For on the postcards were various professionally shot pictures of Gwen in a green nurses uniform doing different poses.

"When did Gwen take these?" Trent asked aloud as they all examined the postcards.

"She somehow snuck behind you to take those photos," Duncan commented as Trent raised one postcard up for a better look. "She definitely had to have taken these for this challenge." Duncan shrugged and walked away while Trent merely sighed and started to put the postcards back into his drawer. Unbeknownst to the others, he secretly pocketed one of them.

"You know, this would not have been as funny had I not opened first," Harold stated, referring to the book in his desk. "Whoever set this up is very lucky. They knew that I would open the drawer first. I don't believe it would have been funny had we opened the drawer with the pen in it first." The others nodded in agreement.

"Geoff, your turn," Duncan said, although they found that Geoff was already ahead of him.

Geoff opened his drawer and looked in. "What's this?" he asked, pulling out a mysterious envelope. "Something's in it, dudes."

The others positioned themselves around the party dude as he opened the envelope. He pulled out the contents and quickly placed them onto the table for all to see. At the top was what appeared to be an old picture of a three-year-old child. After examining the features, they all realized that this was a three-year-old Chef Hatchet. Harold, Geoff, and Ezekiel started to laugh, resulting in the familiar short music piece to sound.

"Ezekiel, Harold, Geoff out!" Chris announced.

"That is one ugly kid," Duncan stated.

The Nurses in Black swiftly came in, forced Ezekiel, Harold, and Geoff into position, whacked them very hard in the bottom, and disappeared. Harold and Geoff let out yelps of pain while Ezekiel covered his mouth.

"We don't need to look any more," Trent said.

"But there's two more photos in here, bra," Geoff said.

"We gotta look at the rest now," Duncan said with a sigh.

They all watched as Duncan flipped to the next photograph and laid it down for all to see. They looked careful and realized that there was something familiar about the sixteen-year-old in the picture. It then dawned on them. It was Chris McLean. And he was wearing the goofiest pair of seventies clothes they had ever seen. Trent couldn't help but laugh despite all his strength, resulting in the familiar short music piece to play.

"Trent out!" Chris announced.

Trent let out a painful sigh as the Nurse in Black came in. They noticed that a sound was being made somewhere. It sounded like a cat was about to cough up a furball. They looked over to see that Harold was being responsible. Trying as hard as he could to keep from laughing. His making those sounds caused Duncan to laughing, resulting the short music piece to be played again.

"Duncan out!" Chris announced.

"Shut the hell up!" Duncan said to Harold, smacking his arm just as Trent was whacked by the first Nurse in Black. Trent let out a painful scream as the first Nurse disappeared and the second Nurse appeared to whack Duncan. Duncan yelped in pain and then went back to looking at the photo as the second Nurse disappeared. "Check him out."

"Look at those pants and boots," Geoff mused as he examined the picture with the others.

"Wh'oot's this 'oon his waist, eh?" Ezekiel asked.

No answer was given as they decided to flip over to the third and final picture. It was another picture of a young Chris McLean. This time he was fifteen. He was about to kick a soccer ball. And everything about the picture was absolutely ridicules. Duncan, Harold, and Trent started to laugh, resulting in the short music piece to sound.

"Duncan, Harold, Trent out!" Chris announced.

The three kept laughing as the Nurses in Black came in. The forced them into position and whacked them hard in the bottom. All three yelped as the Nurses quickly disappeared and then went back to examining the photo with Geoff and Ezekiel.

"Check out this photo!" Geoff said in awe.

"Just as he's about to kick the ball..." Duncan noted. He then leaned in closer. "Look at the apartment behind him."

"Pretty shady, man," Trent commented. "His face sure was skinny then."

"This isn't fair," Harold muttered, having had enough of looking at the pictures.

"These are some hilarious pics, dudes," Geoff stated.

"Let's just put them back," Duncan said as he gathered up the photos and put them back into the envelope. He then placed the envelope back into Geoff's drawer. "We don't need to see them again."

"H'oo did he get that tight c'oorl 'oon his head?" Ezekiel asked curiously.

"Unbelievable," Harold sighed.

"Whoever took those photos needs to be slapped," Duncan grumbled.

The boys let out sighs that were a mixture of frustration and relaxation. This challenge was already starting to effect them and they badly needed a break. What they didn't know was that they had barely finished the first hour. Things were only going to go downhill from there whether they realized it or not.

* * *

**Current Butt Slap Count:**  
Duncan - 13  
Ezekiel - 11  
Geoff - 8  
Harold - 17  
Trent - 9

**Special Guests Sightings to date:**  
Vincent Cassel and Monica Bellucci, Eva, Leslie Nielsen, Harold's Older Brother, William Shatner

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, 9 Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

The challenge is directly taken from and inspired by an annual batsu, or penalty, game from the Japanese variety show _Downtown no Gaki no Tsukai ya Arahende!_, or _Downtown's "This is No Task for Kids!"_ For the New Year's Eve special, the comedy duo Downtown, made up of Hitoshi Matsumoto and Masatoshi Hamada, the comedy duo Cocorico, made up of Naoki Tanaka and Shozo Endo, and fellow comedian Hosei Yamasaki partake in a "No Laughing" Batsu Game. They would undertake a specific occupation for twenty-four hours and try as best as they could to not laugh. Getting caught laughing results in a painful whack to the butt. The producers would set up in advance a series of traps designed to make the comedians laugh, which includes planting famous celebrities to play outrageous roles. In the early years, the five comedians would partake in a Russian Roulette game of sorts to determine which of them would be forced to compete in the Batsu Game. Since 2007, they did away with that aspect and simply had all five compete. The challenge in this story takes from the game in that same year.

And don't worry. Things will start to move a long faster in the next few chapters.

**Don't forget to keep sending in those reviews!**

**Next Up:** The Twenty-Four Hour No Laughing Challenge Continues


	24. Week 8, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Four

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "Greetings. You're all probably wondering what I'm doing here, speaking to you at this time. Well, it seems that the producers opened the books and realized just how over-budget Chris went with the Twenty-Four Hour No Laughing Challenge he did. A lot of money spent on the building, equipment, traps, props, celebrities, and interns. All for the sake of whacking five boys in the bottom because they broke the no laughing rule. Now, there's plenty of money to be had since Total Drama is such a ratings draw that it's not like they're in financial trouble. But they do like to make sure a reasonable amount is spent for these challenges. Quite obviously, this one went well beyond the accepted limit. So Chris is on a week's probation as a result. Which means, despite that I was enlisted simply to be the kids' Resident Assistant, I'm running the show for a week. Whatever works. Now, with all that said, this brings me to the subject of what to do about the Twenty-Four Hour Challenge. The money had been spent and there's a mountain of footage that's been recorded. It's not like we can just forget the whole thing ever happened. Chris built it up to such a degree that to not show anything would be an absolute no-no in entertainment presentation. But at the same time, the producers are not fond with showing the remainder of the challenge in its entirety. They're especially not happy about the amount of butt slaps the boys received. So, it's been decided to simply edit it down to a series of highlights and greatest hits from the challenge. With yours truly introducing them, I suppose. Now then, we'll start not long after where we left of. I believe we're talking an hour into the challenge. Duncan discovers that there are still things lurking in the drawers."

* * *

**(10:00 am)**

Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, and Trent were sitting around, staring into space and drinking cups of water or hot cocoa. They were utterly bored. So bored that Duncan, against his better judgment, decided to examine the drawers again. He slowly opened one and noticed that there was something inside. The others took notice and waited for him to reveal his discovery.

"There's a push-button in here," Duncan said to a curious Ezekiel. "And it says, 'Do not push!'" Now the others were really interested, looking over in his direction and waiting to see if he would do any thing about it.

"Freaky, isn't it?" Ezekiel noted.

"Yeah," Duncan agreed.

"D'oo they mean d'oon't press the b'oot'oon?" Ezekiel asked. When no answer was immediately given, he blinked and then gave a simple shrug. "It's just a b'oot'oon."

Nothing more happened for a brief period. Duncan sat back in his chair and did nothing about it. His interest having taken hold of common sense, Harold opened the drawer and pulled out the push-button, placing it squarely upon the table.

"It was in your drawer," Harold stated to Duncan. "You deal with it."

"Nobody has to deal with this," Duncan noted. Opened the drawer again and placed the push-button back inside before closing it back up. "Let me just put it away." The room became quiet again for another moment.

"What are you laughing at?" Harold suddenly asked Duncan.

"What?" Duncan asked with a confused brow raised.

The two stared at one another in bewilderment before finally looking away. Once again, all was quiet. The five of them looked out into space, doing absolutely nothing. But their brains were still functioning. And the predominant thought was on the mysterious push-button. It had been quiet for only a few minutes, but it seemed like a few hours. And they were becoming restless with interest about the push-button.

"Why don't you push it in once?" Harold asked, breaking the silence suddenly. He opened the drawer and pulled the push-button out, placing it back on the desk. "It'll make me feel better."

"It's bugging us, bra," Geoff admitted.

"'oonce y'oo d'oo it, it'll be alright," Ezekiel said.

It was a quiet moment before Duncan took a deep breath and leaned forward. He picked up the push-button, examined it on all sides, placed it back down on the table, and then reluctantly pushed the button.

The familiar short music piece played from the button. It was followed by a recorded message. "_Ezekiel out!_" the message said.

"Eh?" Ezekiel cried in horror.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "As the boys would discover, much to Ezekiel's discomfort, the push-button resulted in an automatic out regardless of whether or not the person called out had laughed. They would later find another one with Duncan being on the receiving end of the unfair victimization, but that's another story for another time. Moving on to around thirty minutes later, the boys were called to partake in the daily morning exercises out in front of the hospital. Their instructor turned out to be Tyler and he had a few... interesting... ideas on how he would make the boys laugh without falling on his face."

* * *

**(10:30 am)**

"Okay, everyone," Sierra announced. "Please follow the instructor's lead. Let us begin!" She then pressed a button on a remote. This caused a recording to play on the speakers.

"_Radio exercise, part one,_" an announcer said in the recording. "_Three... two... one..._" Music followed, which was designed to play a specific pattern of music for the exercise routine to go along with.

"Let's start with some flexing and vocal exercises," Tyler proclaimed.

When the cue came, he started to make a strange sound while contorting his body and moving to one side. When the pattern repeated, he did the same thing except moving to the other side. He then started pulling on his pants string, stretching it as far out as he could to one side and then repeating on the other side. The five boys watched in complete disbelief at what they were seeing. Then they turned to see that the other doctors and nurses were following along exactly to Tyler's instructions. Duncan was the only one who did not laugh, believing this to be more creepy than funny.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "We'll spare you from having to watch ten more minutes of this. Such a sad sight, let me tell you. So the exercise had just ended when another trap was sprung on the boys. One in the form of a unique celebrity appearance."

* * *

**(10:45 am)**

"Where'd they all come from?" Geoff noted aloud as he watched all of the doctors and nurses being dismissed and returning into the hospital. "I didn't see any of them inside."

All of a sudden, a group of nurses started screaming. Not in horror. But in delight. The girls then started running up to a red hot convertible that just pulled up to the side, surrounding it with continuing screams and swoons.

"What the?" Duncan uttered. He, along with the other boys, dared to get a closer look. They managed to catch that, being drowned out by all the screaming, "Take On Me" was playing in the convertible. The driver then revved up the engine to show off to the adoring girls before he finally turned the ignition off and hopped into a sitting position on the door.

This playboy doctor turned out to be Brendan Fraser.

"What's your schedule like today?" a nurse said after all the screaming finally died down. The boys noticed that this nurse looked very much like, and probably was, Katie.

"Let's see..." Fraser said, speaking in a flirtatious manner as he pocketed his sunglasses. "Oh, I'll be doing open heart surgery." All of the girls began to swoon in awe.

"Are you free tonight, doctor?" another nurse asked. This one looked a lot like, was indeed, Sadie.

"Tonight?" Fraser asked, forming a grin on his face. "Do you wanna go out?" All of the girls started screaming in a seemingly orgasmic manner while Fraser simply laughed along. "Okay. I'll be right there." Fraser then stepped on the door before leaping out to land on the ground.

Suddenly, in the blink of an eye, Fraser dropped in further into the ground and then completely disappeared. The nurses screamed in horror at what just happened while all five boys began to laugh uncontrollably. Brendan Fraser had just jumped right into a boobie trap. Harold, still laughing, nearly threw his nurses cap onto the ground at having fallen for such an unexpected trap.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "In case any one was wondering, Brendan Fraser was not harmed doing that stunt. So the boys make it back to the Nurses Station. And Duncan decides, presumably out of sheer boredom, to play a little dirty with Geoff. Apologies in advance to any one who might find what Duncan does to be offensive. Be warned that we left in a few butt slaps for this one."

* * *

**(11:00 am)**

"You know, Geoff," Duncan said in a rather nonchalant manner. "You're letting out something weird when you get hit. It's changed since we were on the island. You sound a little... shall I say... gay?" He made no reaction when Geoff stared at him in confusion. "Now I don't know if you're acting, but I sort of noticed it during the morning exercise. You were all 'Iyaaan!'"

Geoff started to chuckle and tried to cover his mouth with his arm as quickly as possible. Even Ezekiel managed to squeak out a slight chuckling snort. Then the familiar short music piece played.

"Geoff, Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"Eh?" Ezekiel gasped in horror. "I d'oon't think Geoff s'oonds like that!"

His cries went ignored as the Nurses in Black came rushing in. They forced Geoff and Ezekiel into position before whacking them hard in the bottom. The others took note of the very high-pitched yelp Geoff made upon getting hit.

* * *

"Geoff, you gotta stop with your moaning," Duncan continued. "Something's changed in you."

"My voice's changed?' Geoff asked curiously.

"Make it more like 'Uaaagh!'" Harold suggested.

"Or you can just keep sounding gay," Duncan added.

Geoff and Trent couldn't help themselves and they started to chuckle.

* * *

"Just be quiet," Trent managed to say to Duncan through the pain.

"It's not like that seriously," Geoff tried to reason while rubbing his behind.

"Can't you take it like a man?" Duncan asked, once more in a nonchalant manner.

"I'm not gay!" Geoff practically cried.

"Seriously, Duncan," Trent said. "No more of this nonsense."

"I'm not doing it on purpose!" Geoff added in complaint.

"How about you do this?" Harold once again suggested. "'Ahhh!'"

"H'oow a'boot 'Ooo?'" Ezekiel added.

"'Ohhh?'" Geoff asked.

"Why d'oon't y'oo practice, eh?" Ezekiel suggested.

Geoff thought for a moment and then leaned forward, pretending to have been hit. "Ohhh!" he uttered. He then suddenly started to chuckle out of the sheer ridiculousness of the whole thing. The familiar music piece sounded.

"Geoff out!" Chris announced.

"Time to redeem yourself, Geoff," Duncan said.

A Nurse in Black rushed into the room and forced Geoff into position. Geoff received the hard whack to the bottom and let out the sound suggested to him by Ezekiel in a much deeper tone. Just as the Nurse in Black disappeared and Geoff was rubbing his bottom, Harold and Duncan began laughing hysterically at the whole thing.

"What the hell was that?" Duncan asked through his laughter.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "By the way, those Nurses in Black are played by rotating interns. Many of them actually appear on camera where they themselves were subjected to various forms of humiliation in order to get the boys to laugh. I'll give you an example later. But first, I think it would be nice if we had a little music going here."

* * *

**(12:15 pm)**

Sierra led the boys down the stairs from the third floor to the second floor, returning them to the break room after they had met their patients. All five were rather disappointed with how things turned out, expecting to actually work for a change than to continue sitting around in sheer boredom. Then came something completely unexpected.

_"Caro mio ben,"_

The boys looked at one another in confusion. Not quite sure what they were hearing or where it was coming from.

_"Credimi almen,"_

They looked down the hall and found that there was someone who was singing through an open window. The volume of the voice was loud enough for the entire hospital to hear the song being sung. Trent immediately recognized that the song was an opera. Geoff recognized that the singer was the doctor of internal medicine, Leslie Nielsen.

_"Senza di te,  
Languisce il cor."_

"That's pretty cool," Geoff said to the others as they made their way into the break room. They all nodded in agreement.

_"Caro mio ben,"_

"And no sign of quitting," Harold noted as they all took their seats.

_"Credimi almen,  
Senza di te,"_

"Yep, he's not quitting," Trent sighed.

"Damn..." Duncan groaned.

_"Languisce il cor."_

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "You've probably noticed by now, but some of the other kids managed to get involved in trying to make the boys laugh. This is because Chris offered them $100 for each laugh they managed to produce. Meaning if they could get all five to laugh at least once during their appearance, that person would earn $500. Obviously, the more laughs they cause the more money they get. Here we see Courtney earn a thousand bucks for teaching her CIT skills to a few recruits."

* * *

**(1:15 pm)**

"I'm tired of freezing my butt off," Harold noted as Sierra led them through the hallway on the first floor. The five boys kept following along until they were stopped at the door leading to an open area of the hospital grounds.

"Oh look," Sierra said, pointing outside. "The rescue team is conducting a drill." She waved at the boy to join her in watching the display up close. Just as they stepped out the door, they all noticed a familiar face. One that made Duncan muster as much strength as he could to keep from laughing.

Standing proud and tall to one side was Courtney, wearing a rescue paramedic uniform and helmet. She had her hands to her hips and presented herself very much in command of the three recruits standing at attention. Among the three was a very old man, looking no less than seventy-years-old.

"We are conducting our routine rescue drill," Courtney announced. "Give me your number!"

"One!" the first recruit spoke loudly.

"Two!" the second recruit spoke loudly.

"Three..." the old recruit was barely able to utter. The boys immediately busted out in laughter.

"Underwood, not loud enough!" Courtney commanded.

* * *

"There are three victims," Courtney stated, pointing to three dummies lying fifty feet behind the recruits. She then blew on a whistle. "Time is critical in saving lives. Time starts... NOW!"

"Yes, sir!" all three recruits said.

The recruits turned and started running toward the dummy. The boys were doing all they could to keep from laughing as they watched the old recruit just barely to run. All of a sudden, the old man dropped and disappeared deep into the ground. The boys lost it, whether they wanted to or not. The old man had just fallen into another boobie trap.

"Is he okay?" Harold managed to say through his laughter.

"Dude, they're really milking this boobie trap joke," Geoff noted.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "In case you were wondering, the old man was fine with barely a scratch. Sierra then led the boys back into the hospital. But there was another trap ready to spring immediately upon them."

* * *

**(1:20 pm)**

What happened with the rescue team drill was still very fresh on the boys minds. They were in the hallway, presumably to pass the hospital director's office when they heard an announcement about to be made in the intercom.

"Time for the doctor to make another round," the announcement stated. They were quite sure it was Jessica doing these.

Sierra directed the boys to stand to one side. The dramatic music played overhead and Leslie Nielsen, the doctor of internal medicine, began to make his rounds. As before, he was followed and surrounded by a number of doctors and nurses. The boys were looking to see if a familiar face had returned from the first time.

"Well?" Duncan asked quietly.

"We're okay this time," Harold responded. "My brother's gone."

The boys felt relaxed as the the group were mere steps away from stopping in front of them. Then Duncan recognized a differently familiar face. He couldn't help but laugh, pointing out to the others who it was. And they too began to laugh as well, Geoff being the one to fail in trying not to. For hidden behind Leslie Nielsen was Bridgette.

"Yeah, that's her," Geoff said through his laughter. The boys were laughing so much that they could barely here Leslie Nielsen converse with another doctor.

"I can see progress has been made," Leslie Nielsen noted as he looked over an x-ray given to him by the other doctor.

Quite suddenly, Bridgette started moving around Leslie Nielsen and the other doctor. The boys braced themselves to see what she would do as she literally ran up to Geoff.

"Hello!" Bridgette cheerfully said. "Good luck today." She then placed her fingers on her cheek and cocked her head slightly to one side, widening her smile. "Pu!" The boys started to laugh hysterically. Even Sierra was giggling very hard. Bridgette took another step closer to Geoff and repeated. "Good luck today. Pu!"

Almost without warning, Leslie Nielsen gently pushed Bridgette even closer to Geoff as he and the rest of the group began to walk away. Bridgette remained in place, as if trying to get Geoff to respond directly to her.

"I'll do my best, okay babe?" Geoff managed to say through the unstoppable laughter. "You better get going."

Bridgette nodded. She maintained her stance while looking directly at each of the other boys before finally moving on to catch up with Leslie Nielsen and the rest of the group.

"Thank you!" the boys managed to say. Then they all groaned, realizing what it meant to have busted out in laughter.

"It's not fair for her to talk to you like that," Harold stated. "'Good luck today?'"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "The surprising part about all that was that Geoff and Bridgette managed to keep their hormones in check. Otherwise, it would have been difficult to get the challenge to move along on schedule. Remember when I mentioned that the interns who rotated in and out as the Nurses in Black would get humiliated? This next series of clips will showcase just that as they competed in a series of games that were used, in character, to cheer up a kid before his appendix surgery. But really, it's to give the five boys a good laugh watching others suffer. And who would be better to host such an event?"

* * *

**(2:15pm)**

The five boys were in awe. They were seated at a table and watched as a parade of men dressed as nurses stood in the middle of the field. But what really blew the boys away was that this event was being commented by Alex Trebek.

"This is the Mental Care Event!" Alex Trebek announced from his platform. "Nurses from every department challenge themselves to help patients muster up courage for their upcoming surgeries. Our first challenge is... Stop the Seed of Courage!"

The boys were directed to look over at a giant stage that was set up. There was a giant mouth with a big yellow ball inside. They could see that the ball was in position to roll down a slanted ramp. At the bottom of the ramp was a platform. Next to the platform was a rather medium sized pool.

"This is how the challenge goes," Alex Trebek continued. "Each nurse by try to stop the rolling seed, which is ten feet wide and weighs in at 220 pounds. By stopping the seed, they'll give Aaron more courage needed for tomorrow. And now, let us introduce our first challenger... Franklin!" The nurse named Franklin made his way to the platform at the bottom of the ramp. "I believe Franklin has a few words for Aaron."

"Aaron..." Franklin managed to utter to the camera. "Believe in your strength."

The boys looked over to see that the seven-year-old patient wasn't really paying any sort of attention to what was happening. This nearly caused them to chuckle.

"He wasn't looking," Geoff noted to Ezekiel quietly.

"Can Franklin really stop this seed?" Alex Trebek commented as Franklin positioned himself. "He'll be ready any second now." A countdown clock was sounded. At the end of which, the giant ball was pushed down the ramp. "The Seed of Courage begins its roll... Can Franklin stop it?" Franklin found himself being rammed into by the ball, which sent him flying into the pool. The sight of which causing the five boys to laugh. "What do you know? Franklin goes face first against the 220 pound Seed." This commentary line only made the boys laugh even more.

* * *

"So far, the Seed of Courage has not been stopped," Alex Trebek recapped.

"He looks bored as hell," Duncan said to the others, noting how the patient looked.

"Our next challenge," Alex Trebek continued. "The Stomach Fluid Pond! Our nurses are to dive into this water tank and manage to capture the Seed at the bottom under a one minute time limit. Only they are not diving into water, but lotion." The last fact stated perked the interest of the five boys, wondering what swimming in lotion would be like. "Our first challenger is Nurse Kevin!"

"Aaron..." Kevin began to say as he stood over the water tank full of clear lotion. "Have faith in your doctor and nurses' ability with your surgery tomorrow. ... Why not try opening your appendix?" The boys knew full well the last line was a deliberate bad joke intended to make them laugh. It didn't work.

"Any minute now..." Alex Trebek commentated as the countdown clock sounded. At the end, Kevin dove into the lotion and found himself literally rising back up to the surface. The sight of which amazed the five boys. "He's now getting some air. Will he go back in?" After taking a deep breath, Kevin submerged. But the lotion continued to force every inch of his body back up to the surface, causing him to miss grabbing the Seed by inches. "His left hand came very close that time." The boys were laughing in awe of how one could not properly swim though a pool of lotion. "Time is still ticking. He has about forty seconds left. He goes for a second try... but no cigar." Watching the intern struggle so desperately made the boys laugh even more. "He has ten seconds left. He'll attempt with his feet... Three... two... one..." The bell sounded, announcing the end of the time limit. The boys were now laughing hysterically at what they saw.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "I'm sure you folks can see quite clearly how this challenge went way over-budget. The building of those props alone cost a fourth of what was ultimately spent. Skipping ahead several hours, we move on to what will certainly be a moment neither one of the five boys will ever forget. No matter how much they desperately want to."

* * *

**(5:30 pm)**

"Let's check out how an MRI works," Sierra proclaimed as she led them to a particular set of doors on the first floor. "This is where we perform brain scans. Each of you, one by one, will get a brain scan. Let's start with Ezekiel. The rest of you sit tight right here and wait for your turn." She pointed over to a couch the four would have enough room to sit on.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Previously recorded entry._/ "MRI scanning is a medical imaging technique used to look at the internal structure and function of the body. But this MRI comes with a unique feature."

* * *

"This way, Ezekiel," Sierra said, directing the nervous prairie boy to the exam table.

"Why does Ezekiel get to go first?" Harold said to the others as they waited patiently.

"This l'ooks scary, eh," Ezekiel noted after being strapped down to the table.

The table was activated and the scanning process began. The table began to be pulled into the MRI machine with Ezekiel lying perfectly still in complete nervousness. He had no idea what was about to happen and was actually afraid of what could possibly show up in the results. As the table reached the end, Ezekiel noticed there was something odd. He saw that he was looking up as a specific object. That object turned out to be Izzy's face.

The sight of Izzy made him chuckle. Until he felt the table beginning to ascend. Then he saw the giant grin on Izzy's face and got really scared. His eyes shot wide open in terror when he heard her make a silent giggle. When the table stopped ascending, it had been brought up high enough for Izzy to place a big wet kiss on Ezekiel's tightly shut lips.

The boys waited patiently when they started to hear a muffled scream. They looked over with concern at the doors that led into the MRI room, bewildered at what they were hearing.

"What's going on in there?" Geoff asked nervously.

"What was that?" Harold asked further.

The four boys then looked at one another in confusion until they heard the familiar short music piece sound suddenly.

"Ezekiel out!" Chris announced.

"Why is he out?" Trent asked in shock.

The boys were more confused and even more concerned than before, voicing them to one another. They continued discussing until the doors opened. They immediately silenced themselves and watched as a completely shaken and pale white Ezekiel slowly exited. He had only taken a few steps until he collapsed onto the floor.

"You're up next, Harold," Sierra announced.

Harold nearly gasped in surprise upon hearing his name called. He finally got up and nervously entered the MRI room, managing to take a few glances as the nearly unconscious Ezekiel on the floor. Trent and Geoff immediately went over to check up on the prairie boy, picking him up and sitting him on the couch.

"Are you okay?" Geoff asked. "What's going on?" Ezekiel made no answer other than to continue shaking.

"Go ahead and lie down," Sierra said, directing Harold to the exam table.

"Lie on my back?" Harold asked nervously. He eventually did as he was told and laid himself down. After getting strapped in, he found himself unable to do anything except to watch and feel as the exam table was inserted into the MRI machine. He was part way into the machine when he had a feeling that something was out of place. "What... what's this? What is this?"

When the table had stopped moving, he found himself staring face to face with Izzy. The sight of her caused him to chuckle. Then a dark thought entered into his mind. That thought became a reality when the felt the table beginning to ascend.

"What?" Harold nearly screamed. "Are you serious?" He shut his lips tight as he could do nothing but listen to Izzy giggle with morbid delight. He then started screaming very loud through his closed lips as he felt Izzy giving him a kiss. He instinctively moved his feet in various directions under the table finally started to descend, ending the kiss. But that didn't stop him from screaming, which he could finally open his mouth to do.

"This is not cool at all," Trent commented as the others could hear the screams continue to sound.

"What are they doing to him?" Geoff asked, his feeling of concern turning into fright.

"That sucked..." Harold managed to utter once the table was out of the MRI machine.

* * *

"Freaky..." Trent uttered nervously as the exam table began to enter the MRI machine. Once it stopped moving, he looked straight up to see Izzy looking down on him. He could not help but chuckle at seeing her face. Only the feeling instantly went away when he realized what was about to happen to him. Then the exam table began to ascend. "Oh God... Forgive me..."

Trent shut his lips and closed his eyes as tight as he could. He was already beginning to scream as Izzy started to giggle. Then the table stopped moving and he could feel Izzy's lips on his. He screamed so loud that it forced opened his mouth while he was trying as best as he could to turn it away from her.

* * *

"Lie down, please," Sierra said to Geoff, directing him to the exam table.

"I'm scared," Geoff said as he looked around the room, trying to figure out what was going to happen.

"This is not funny at all," Trent muttered as he sat himself down on the couch with the others.

Of the four outside the MRI room, Duncan was the only one who had yet to go through the examination. Ezekiel was still pale white and shaking, Harold looked absolutely crestfallen, and Trent appeared as though he had been shot. Duncan was the least likely of the boys to be afraid of anything. But all that he has seen and heard has made him feel more concerned than ever.

Geoff took deep breath after deep breath as the exam table was inserted into the MRI machine. He tried to look as much ahead as he could when he realized there was something waiting for him. The table came to a stop, leaving him staring face to face at Izzy. He chuckled, which turned into the kind one would do in terror. The table began to ascend. Geoff began to instinctively scream before quickly shutting his mouth tight before the giggling Izzy planted her kiss upon his lips. His muffled screams getting louder and louder with each passing second.

* * *

Duncan watched as Geoff exited the MRI room. The party guy then immediately marched straight toward the bathroom. Seeing this increased Duncan's concern about what was happening in that room.

"Duncan, you're the last one," Sierra announced.

"Do I really have to go?" Duncan asked nervously as he got up.

Duncan was led into the room and directed to the exam table. Being strapped him left him even more concerned about the whole situation. As the table began to be inserted into the MRI machine, the first feeling of fear began to creep in.

"Nothing to be scared of..." Duncan he muttered. "Nothing to be scared of... But I don't like this at all... This is really freaky stuff..." He continued to mutter to himself until he got a good look at what he was about to be looking straight at. His first reaction was to chuckle. Then the horrible feeling of what was about to happen sank in.

The table began to ascend and Duncan slammed his mouth shut as tightly as possible, the same with his eyes. He could do nothing about hearing Izzy giggle with glee. Then he felt her lips touching his, causing him to scream through his closed mouth. Suddenly, he could feel something else touching his lips. Her tongue. Now screaming frantically through his closed mouth, he was kicking his feet about and continuing to do so under the table finally descended.

* * *

The four boys looked up when the doors opened. Duncan slowly stepped out of the room and into the hallways. He was covering her mouth with a handkerchief and looking very much like he had just been knocked out.

"Pretty scary, wasn't it?" Harold asked quietly.

Duncan removed the handkerchief from his mouth and took a deep breath. "I'm going to have a bad... nightmare about this!" he uttered. The others felt exactly the same way.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "I think you guys got a good idea of what went on in there. Moving ahead a couple hours, the boys encountered Heather. In this situation, a perverted doctor harassed Heather by implying a lot of naughty things about her. The boys had no problem laughing it up as Heather had to sit there and take it. But then she got to have the last laugh in the whole thing, much to the painful horror of one of the boys."

* * *

**(7:45 pm)**

"Nobody has ever treated me like that," Heather stated rather furiously, sitting on her bed with her arms crossed. "I came here because of this hospital's supposedly good reputation. What are you going to do about it?"

"If you will, ma'am," Sierra said nervously. "These five nurses will do anything you please." The five boys looked over at her in shock over what she had just said. They did not like it one bit. "We're very sorry about this."

"You mean anything?" Heather asked for clarification. She watched as Sierra nodded. After taking a deep breath, Heather reached over behind her and revealed a tray. On it were four push-buttons. The boys knew exactly what this meant and groaned. "I have this set of push-buttons."

"Um..." Harold uttered. "They say not to press it." He would regret opening his mouth.

"Harold," Heather stated. "Come and press it." Harold was hesitant to obey. "She said that you would do anything, right?"

Harold sighed. "Okay," he said. "I'll pick this one." He slowly picked up one of the push-buttons.

"Press it," Heather demanded.

Harold looked at the push-button. Then he looked at the other four boys. All of them were nervous about what would result from pushing the button. Letting out another sigh, Harold pushed the button.

The familiar music was played from the button, followed by a recorded message. "_Harold..._" the message said. "_... Thai kick!_"

All of the boys gasped in horror. Moments later, a professional Muay Thai Kickboxer entered the room. The rest of the boys immediately scattered as far away as possible while Harold was placed into position. The kickboxer than landed a swift kick to Harold's bottom, nearly sending him flying across the room screaming. The kickboxer left, but Harold was now skipping around in pain in a hopeless attempt to alleviate the pain. Heather was doing a very good job of showing no emotion, otherwise she would have shown just how pleased she was with herself at the moment.

"Not cool!" Geoff cried, watching Harold continue to skip about painfully.

"That looked painful," Duncan stated, but in a way showing that he himself was quite horrified at what he had seen.

"This is the worst punishment yet!" Harold proclaimed. He wanted to rub his bottom, but even slightly touching it would result in the pain returning with a devastating sting each time he would try.

"Harold," Heather said, bringing all of the attention back to her. She was as calm as could be. "Pick another one."

Harold started to moan. "Gosh," he said. "How can I top what just happened?"

"Harold," Heather repeated. "Pick another one."

With a sigh, Harold reluctantly did as he was told and slowly picked up another push-button. "You know what?" he began to say. "The way she keeps picking me, I can't help but to think the worst." He nearly flinched when he heard a giggle. He looked over at Sierra, giving her a glare as if asking her why she found the situation funny. She merely shrugged.

"Harold," Heather said, still calm as could be. "Hurry up."

"Okay," Harold responded. "Here I go." He took a deep breath and looked at the push-button in his hand. "Um... Okay, I'm going for it." He then held the push-button as far out as he could. Then with great nervousness and hesitation, he pushed the button.

The familiar music was played from the button, followed by a recorded message. "_Harold..._" the message said. "_... Thai kick!_"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "By the end of all that, Harold was on the receiving end of three Thai kicks. None of the other boys received any. You could easily tell that Heather really enjoyed her participation in this challenge, even though she had to endure being called naughty names by a perverted intern. Speaking of special guests who enjoyed their participation in this challenge..."

* * *

**(10:00 pm)**

The boys were exhausted and were also getting very tired. They had been going at it for thirteen hours, meaning they still had another eleven to go. They hoped there would be a period in which they would not have to deal with any traps and simply sleep. The very thing Duncan was on the verge of doing, positioning himself in such a way in his chair while the others walked around the break room in an attempt to alleviate whatever lingering pain they had in their bottoms.

"Hey guys!" Sierra announced as she suddenly entered the room. She was as cheerful as she had been since the start of the challenge, which left the boys wondering for a second how she could manage to remain so for thirteen hours. "This is a good time to observe the anesthesia department. Shall we?"

The boys let out collective groans, but did little else to fight off the inevitable. Duncan got out of his chair and joined the others in following Sierra out of the break room. Their heads hanging low the entire time.

"This won't be easy, I'm sure," Harold muttered.

Remaining on the second floor, Sierra led them down a couple hallways until they came upon their destination. She opened the door and motioned for the others to enter before her.

"I have a bad feeling about this..." Duncan grumbled as the boys entered the room one by one. Once they were inside, they had a good look around to see that there were three tables set up. Each one had a body lying on it, covered in a thin green sheet. "See? I knew this was going to be bad."

"Why don't you guys line up over there and wait," Sierra directed, pointing them to one side of the room.

"This looks impossible," Harold said as he and the others did as they were told.

"This is gonna be terrible, bras," Geoff added.

"I can't g'oo thr'oo with this, eh," Ezekiel whimpered. "What am I g'oona d'oo?"

They then noticed that on the other side of the room was a pair of double-doors. They only just saw it because it slid open automatically, signifying that someone was entering. And that someone was a very familiar face that caused all of the boys to groan. All of the boys except for Trent, who merely let out a heavy sigh.

"See, I knew it'd be Gwen," Duncan muttered under his breath.

"Nice to see you all," Gwen said as she approached them.

"You, too," the boys responded in near unison.

"You are here to observe and study a new advancement in anesthesiology," Gwen explained. "As you can see, we have three patients who have been anesthetized. Let's observe them one by one."

The boys watched nervously as Gwen went to each table one by one and pulled off the sheet covers to reveal the identity of the bodies. The first turned out to be the bear they so fondly remembered from the island. The boys took note that while the bear appeared to be unconscious, they were very sure it wasn't. Supporting their idea was the fact that the bear was also strapped down pretty tight. On the second table was none other than Sasquatchinakwa. Like the bear, the creature only appeared to be unconscious and was also strapped down tight.

"He's completely under and will not wake up," Gwen noted, as if she had seen the look of concern and worry on their faces.

She proceeded to the last table and withdrew the sheet cover. On the table was the Psycho Killer from back on the island. Like the bear and Sasquatchinakwa, he seemed to be completely out of it and secured on the table. His very appearance, coupled with the idea the boys had in mind of what they were there to do, caused Duncan and Harold to chuckle.

* * *

"These three patients won't wake up under any circumstances," Gwen stated as they all gathered around the first table. "Observe." She pulled up a slipper in hand and then slapped the bear with it as hard as she could. The bear winced in pain. Then Gwen slapped the bear again, this time doing so twice. The bear winced and moaned slightly after each hit.

The boys started to laugh hysterically at what they were witnessing. Their belief that this was not going to be pleasant was spot on. Because they knew that Gwen was going to unload on these three and the five of them were going to be laughing along the way. Which would result in their bottoms getting ridiculously sore very quickly.

* * *

"He will not wake up," Gwen said as they gathered around Sasquatchinakwa. The boys then watched as she proceeded to slap the creature silly. Each hit causing Sasquatchinakwa to wince and shrink into itself as much as it could. Only Gwen kept on slapping it with the slipper. "See? The anesthetic is working."

The boys were once again laughing their heads off. Ezekiel and Geoff were clutching their stomachs and trying hard not to fall over. They were definitely not going to last much longer in this scenario. But they figured it was far from over.

* * *

"Because the patient is under the effects anesthesia, he will not wake up," Gwen said as they gathered around the Psycho Killer. Even before she proceeded with the hits, the boys were laughing. They knew what was coming. And given what had happened on the island, they figured that she felt it would be well deserved.

Gwen began slapping the Psycho Killer repeatedly with the one slipper. Each hit caused the man to wince, contorting his face so as to try to maintain a fixed expression. He was failing miserably. Then the boys watched as Gwen pulled out a second slipper. Doubling the pain she would be inflicting. And that she did as she slammed the slippers again and again on the Killer's face. The boys were now crying with laughter.

"Gwen, stop it!" Trent managed to say through the laughter as he decided to pull her way from the Psycho Killer.

"You have gone too far!" Harold stated through his laughter. They figured Gwen took that as a compliment considering.

* * *

Gwen had put the slippers away. But she was far from finished. She next revealed a roll of duct tape in hand. The boys watched in anticipation as she pulled out a strip and placed it over the Psycho Killer's eye brows.

"That is going to leave some marks tomorrow," Harold noted.

Gwen pressed down to make sure the tape had been applied thoroughly on the Psycho Killer. After waiting for a small moment, she grabbed the tape and yanked it as hard as she could off of the Psycho Killer. He shuttered, trying desperately not to scream as he winced in pain. Gwen turned over the tape to show the boys the result of her handy work. A good chunk of the Psycho Killer's eye brows had been removed. The sight of this caused Harold and Geoff to laugh.

"He looks pretty bad-ass without the eye brows," Duncan commented, examining the Psycho Killer's face.

* * *

"What's that?" Geoff asked as Gwen led the boys back to Sasquatchinakwa with another object in hand.

"I'm inserting an empty balloon in its mouth," Gwen answered.

She was only partially right, but the boys would find that out eventually. The balloon was attached to a pump. She placed the balloon into Sasquatchinakwa's mouth and began pumping, inflating the balloon with air. She continued to pump until the balloon could not expand any further in the creature's mouth, causing it to pop. It was then that the boys discovered that the balloon wasn't empty like she said it was. The balloon had be partially filled with water. The sight of the balloon exploding and water overflowing in Sasquatchinakwa's mouth caused Duncan, Geoff, and Trent to laugh.

* * *

Gwen brought the boys back to the Psycho Killer. She said nothing as she revealed her final experiment. In hand was a small box with something inside. He picked it up with two fingers, revealing to the boys that in the box was a stag beetle. The boys tried the best they could to contain their laughter as she slowly began to bring the beetle down over the Psycho Killer's face, specifically his nose. In an instant, the beetle began to give the nose a piercing pinch. The Psycho Killer winced horribly in pain, trying so hard not to scream. Trent was the only one of the boys who was not laughing seeing this. He was more shocked than anything that Gwen went this far.

"Check out his leg!" Geoff cried. He pointed to the Psycho Killer's leg, which had managed to rise up as much as it could given the restraints he was in. This caused the four boys who were laughing to laugh even more.

"What's 'oop with the leg?" Ezekiel asked through his laughter.

"His leg, look!" Trent stated to Gwen. Gwen merely smiled and allowed the beetle to keep pinching the Psycho Killer just a little longer while Harold, Duncan, Geoff, and Ezekiel were howling with laughter.

"He can get his nose pierced now," Duncan managed to say though his laughter.

* * *

"Do you all understand the effects of the drug now?" Gwen asked. The experiments were complete and the stag beetle was safely placed away in the small box.

"We all got it," Geoff answered immediately.

"Yes!" the other boys added just as quickly.

"Thank you for your time, doctor," Sierra stated. She gave Gwen a wave, who in return simply nodded. Sierra then directed the boys to leave the room. As they were exiting, Trent managed to glance quickly over his shoulder to get one last look at Gwen. He managed to catch sight of her winking at him.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "Let's just say the three 'bodies' were compensated as long as they stayed in character and remained unconscious throughout the ordeal they suffered. So we skip a few more hours ahead to our final highlight of the challenge. The boys seem like they're about ready to hit the hey, especially when they are taken to a dormitory where the nurses would sleep should it be a necessity. But a different kind of trap is about to be sprung upon them. While it is not one that is designed so much to make them laugh, it no less does whatever it can to put them off their guard."

* * *

**(1:00 am)**

The boys sat around. They were either staring into space, drinking from their cups, or examining the room for the umpteenth time in the last five minutes. The beds were right their wait for them. Only all five of them are concerned that they were about to be forced into doing something. Sure enough, the door opened and Sierra sheepishly entered.

"Um, guys?" Sierra managed to say in a mousy voice. "I have a favor to ask you. I left my house key at the Nurse Station. Would Ezekiel, Geoff, and Trent go get it for me, please?"

The three named boys looked at one another, first in confusion and then in concern. Then they turned their attention back to Sierra. "Isn't this outside our job description?" Trent asked.

"That's why I'm asking you as a favor," Sierra explained. Then she put on her best puppy dog pout and started to beg. "If you would. Please?" No one could resist the puppy dog pout no matter how hard they tried.

* * *

The near freezing temperature only added to the shivering feeling they had as the three boys slowly approached the hospital. They noticed that there were barely any lights on. And those that were on were in a seemingly dark blue color. All of a sudden, the hospital had turned into a potentially spooky place.

"I'm seri'oosly scared, eh," Ezekiel whimpered.

"Stay by my side, little dude," Geoff said quietly to Ezekiel. "Got it?" What was not said aloud was that he was offering it more so that he could be reminded that he himself wasn't entering the hospital alone.

"We have to find the key at the Nurse Station?" Trent asked, trying to remember what they were supposed to do. The others nodded before they stepped through the doors and entered.

"Freakin' scary in here, dudes," Geoff whispered as they slowly made their way further into the hospital.

"Scary, scary, scary," Ezekiel muttered quietly.

The three continued to move onward. They made their way up the stairs. They were about to turn to the next set when they stopped. With how dimly lit everything was, they could not tell if they were seeing someone standing in front of them or they just happened to be looking at their reflection in a mirror. They were hesitant at first to do anything, until their eyes adjusted enough for them to conclude that they were looking at a mirror. Satisfied, they moved further up the stairs. Once they had reached the second floor, the slowly continued. But they had barely made a few steps forward when suddenly...

_CLANK!_

The sound caused all three to let out slight cries and screams. Their reactions were very different from one another. Trent took a step back and instinctively threw his arms you in a stupid attempt to cover himself. Ezekiel immediately tried to hide himself within his jacket. Geoff found himself slipping and falling back onto his bottom. The three boys remained still for a moment until they could get their barrings straight. Believing that possible danger had passed, they went about regaining their composure.

"What are you doing?" Trent asked to Geoff.

"I don't know," Geoff answered as he slowly got back onto his feet. The boys decided to quickly look around, hoping to find the source of the sound. Ezekiel crouched down and picked up a can.

"Did that fly in fr'oom s'oom where?" Ezekiel asked.

"I don't know," Geoff replied, scratching his head. "I heard it tumbling through." With nothing else said at that moment, the boys continued to move onward toward the Nurse station. "I just hurt my elbow, too."

The boys said nothing more as they slowly and quietly continued to walk through the hall way. They were trying to be prepared for anything that may happen at any possible second.

_BANG!_

The boys yelped, trying to leap away from where they heard the sound. It was obvious that something had forcibly hit one of the walls. Trent and Ezekiel managed to stay on their feet, Ezekiel once more trying to hide in jacket. And once again, Geoff found himself slipping and falling back onto the ground. They waited a moment before it was clear that nothing was out to get them.

"I didn't know you were the type to fall on his butt," Trent commented to Geoff, who was slowly picking himself up off of the ground. "All I do is shout out."

"Who wouldn't be terrified of this, bra?" Geoff noted. They boys then continued onward through the hallway.

"Really freaky," Ezekiel whimpered quietly.

The boys continued to move quietly. The kept up their guard, knowing that anything could happen at any time. They took careful steps as they went onward through the hallway. They were a dozen feet away from the Nurse Station when they heard something that caused them to freeze in their tracks.

The faint, soft whisper of a female voice singing in sorrow.

The boys waited until the sound disappeared almost as quickly as it appeared. Then they waited a little more, just to be sure that it was probably nothing more than their imagination playing with them. Satisfied, they took one step forward.

The singing returned and it was a little louder now.

They instinctively made a complete 180 degree turn. Looking with their eyes shot completely wide open to see if they was any one, or any thing, behind them. The singing then disappeared just as it had appeared. They waited just a little more before slowly turning back toward their destination and quietly moving onward.

The boys slowly continued until they reached the reception desk. They started looking around in search of Sierra's house key. While it could be that they were in a poorly lit space, they were nevertheless having a hard time finding the key.

"Do you see the key?" Geoff asked quietly. "Where is it?"

"Where is it?" Ezekiel asked further, lifting up various objects and hoping to find the key placed underneath.

"Could it be inside the room?" Trent suggested after looking through a number of folders.

"I don't see it anywhere else," Geoff responded with a shrug.

The three boys slowly and quietly made their away around the desk. They moved onward toward the door leading to the break room. They were still on the guard, believing something was going to happen in any moment.

"Sh'ood we g'oo in here?" Ezekiel asked. There was no immediate answer from the others. With little other options, Ezekiel decided to open the door. He had just barely touched the handle when...

_ZAP!_

Ezekiel's yelp caused Geoff to scream. Which in turn caused Trent to yelp. Which in turn caused Ezekiel to scream. Which in turn caused Geoff to scream even more. Which in turn caused all three to run from the door and back around the reception desk. They stopped, believing themselves to be away from danger at the moment.

"What was that?" Trent asked after they had calmed down.

"I felt s'oom thin' weird, eh," Ezekiel explained.

"What do you mean 'weird?'" Geoff asked.

"I felt s'oom thin' r'oogh," Ezekiel added.

"What do you mean 'rough?'" Geoff questioned further.

There was a quiet moment. During which, the three looked around. They finally decided that they just didn't have the stomach to continue further. They were going to turn back, even though it meant they were going to be called wusses for quite a while.

"Should we head back then?" Trent asked

"Y'oo think s'oo?" Ezekiel asked further.

"We tried..." Geoff said. "But couldn't find it."

The three boys agreed to return empty handed. With their minds set, they quietly and slowly made their way toward the hallway. It was going to be a much longer walk considering, but they decided to take it regardless. They had just entered the hallway when all of their plans had been thrown right out of the window.

To their left was another short hallway. At the end of that was a pair of double doors. Without warning, they suddenly opened viciously. A figure emerged and started running toward them.

The second they saw the doors open, the boys screamed and started running like crazy. Little attention was paid to the fact that Geoff was screaming in the highest pitch he could possibly make. They looked back enough times to confirm that something was chasing after them. They ran as fast as they could through the hallway, their guard was now completely down and were therefore not prepared for anything else to happen.

_CLANK!_

In an even greater state of panic, Geoff slipped and fell back onto the ground. Wasting no time, he scrambled as quickly as he could to get back to his feet and keep running.

Trent was turning the corner on the stairs when he stopped, screamed, and hopped back a few times. Slowly ascending the stairs was another figure. One that was female. And covered in blood. Sensing that she did not see anything in front of her, Trent moved around the bloody nurse and kept moving.

Ezekiel was next to see the bloody nurse and screamed. He only paused for a half a second before running around her. Geoff did not stop one bit. The moment he spotted the bloody nurse, he threw his hand up to cover his sight so that he wouldn't see her. Nevertheless, the fact that the figure was there at all still made him continue to scream as he frantically dropped down the stairs.

The three boys managed to get back together as they bolted straight for the front door. Only to find that a man dressed in only in a pair of Speedos was hold the doors closed, laughing as though he was playing a joke. The boys screamed and yelled at him to open the doors, pushing on them at the same time. There was so much noise going on that they were bound to attract some attention. Even the unwanted ones. The three finally managed to escape out of the building when the figure that was chasing after them made it to the bottom of the stairs and slowed to a stop.

The boys kept running away from the hospital. Screaming along the way.

* * *

Duncan and Harold waited as Ezekiel, Geoff, and Trent slowly entered the room. They were desperately trying to catch their breath, having been running and screaming so hard in such a short amount of time. Seeing just how exhausted the boys were, how pale white Geoff had turned, and Ezekiel still shivering from head to toe, Duncan and Harold seemed very concerned.

"I heard all the commotion out there," Harold stated.

"That was too much," Trent noted as he dropped onto the nearest bed.

"Not cool," Geoff managed to utter.

"That was be'oond imp'oosible," Ezekiel said, still shaking and shuttering as he sat in a chair.

"What do you mean?" Duncan asked curiously. However, he was not going to get an immediate answer.

"Um..." Sierra sheepishly said, bringing the attention to her. "Duncan, Harold? There's, like, a couple more things I need. I left behind a death certificate over at the Nurse Station. Will you pick that up for me?" Geoff immediately walked over to the bathroom, closed the door, and locked it tight. "There is also a file in my locker. Will you pick that up as well?"

"Of course not," Duncan proclaimed, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Come on," Harold groaned. "Are you serious?"

* * *

Duncan and Harold slowly made their way toward the hospital. Like the other three, they were wearing jackets. Which still did little to warm up Duncan completely as he was still wearing the mini skirt.

"It is so quiet," Harold noted aloud. If he was expecting an answer from Duncan, it wasn't going to come. The two approached the hospital, which looked very different from when they last saw it. "Is this the building? Gosh... I don't like this."

With deep breaths, both boys entered the hospital. They took a good look around, noting how there was a severe lack of light. Just enough dimly lit dark blue to show them the objects within. They proceeded further into the building and ascended up the stairs. They were about to turn the corner to the next set when they stopped only briefly. At first it looked like there were others approaching, but they soon discovered that they were merely looking at their reflection in a mirror.

"I can smell the incense," Duncan noted as they continued up the stairs to the second floor. Once they were on the second floor, they took another deep breath and continued onward.

_CLANK!_

Both boys yelped and hopped back a couple steps. They remained still until they believed the immediate danger had passed. The looked around and notice an empty can rolling to a stop on the floor. Shaking their heads, they continued walking.

"Freaking annoying," Harold muttered.

The two were now walking down the hallway. They moved with their guard up, expecting for something to happen at any moment. Suddenly, their legs stopped moving. Against their will. Duncan nearly yelped as he was very close to falling over. Both looked down and wondered how their feet suddenly got stuck on the floor. After wiggling a few times, they managed to free themselves. With deep breaths, they proceeded further down the hall way.

"_Hey!_"

Both nearly screamed and stepped back, looking directly up toward the source of the sound. To their shock and disbelief, someone was leaning the a window that was above one of the side doors. And that someone was Noah, who had an unmistakable smirk on his face, sunglasses over his eyes, and an unbelievably over-sized wine glass in one hand.

"How's it going?" the egghead asked in a very nonchalant manner. Duncan and Harold merely looked at one another and then back up at Noah. They both gave him a slight nod before walking away. As they did so, Noah drank the soda in his wine glass.

"I'm really not into this," Duncan muttered as they continued onward down the hallway. They brought their guard back up as they found themselves roughly a dozen feet away from the reception desk.

_BANG!_

Both screamed and jumped forward, turning around at the same time to see something burst through one of the side walls. The creature moaned and started running toward them.

Instead of running, Duncan reared back and swung a kick right into the creature's stomach. As it collapsed onto the floor, both looked down to see that it was nothing more than the intern who they saw before as the doctor calling Heather naughty names. He was now dressed up like Frankenstein. Duncan kicked the guy again, sending him into retreat. Once they saw him disappear into the darkness, the boys sighed and proceeded back to the reception desk.

"I don't see it," Duncan noted as he looked around the desk.

"I remember her talking about her locker," Harold said.

Believing they needed to go into the break room to retrieve the items, they made their way over to the door. Wanting to get this whole thing done and over with, Duncan walked over and grabbed the door handle.

_ZAP!_

"Ouch," Duncan hissed. He managed to pull the door open enough before pulling his hand back and shaking it.

"What is it?" Harold asked.

"I just got zapped," Duncan answered.

"Something 'electrifying' must be on our way then," Harold said.

"You serious?" Duncan asked, rolling his eyes as how badly the other had joked. The two boys entered the room and immediately noticed that they were not alone. "Someone's here." There was a figure standing at the other end of the room, looking as though it was dressed as a doctor and greeting them.

"Can I help you?" Harold asked. There was no immediate answer. "I'm scared."

"Go get it from him," Duncan said, pushing Harold toward the figure.

Harold glared back at Duncan for a moment before turning back to the figure. After swallowing hard, Harold slowly approached the doctor. He recognized that there was something in the figure's hand. He wasn't sure, but he figured that it was the death certificate. One of the two items he was sent to retrieve.

"Thanks," Harold said just as he was slowly extending his hand out to take the death certificate.

Suddenly, the doctor's head rolled down to its stomach. The sight caused both Duncan and Harold to jump back and scream. The walked back in horror when the disfigured creature started to approach them.

"What... What the heck are you?" Harold muttered.

Duncan decided to let Harold handle the mysterious doctor. He quickly looked and noticed where Sierra's locker was. He then dashed over to open it, hoping to grab the file before any thing else could happen.

Upon opening the door, Duncan jumped back and screamed. A light turned on in the locker to reveal a smiling woman's head. Upon further examination, it appeared she had been stuffed into the locker, bent in a way so that should could fit. One would say that she was bent in such a position that was not humanly possible. Then she wiggled her feet rather cheerfully, which only scared Duncan even more. Harold caught sight of this and also jumped back in terror.

"Creepy..." Duncan managed to say. He then swallowed really hard and mustered the courage to slowly approach the locker once again. "Can I have the file, please?" The woman merely swayed her head from one side to another. Duncan quickly reached in and grabbed the file. He closed the locker and turned to Harold. "Go grab the certificate."

Harold glanced nervously at Duncan before turning back to the doctor figure. He noted that at some point the head and rolled back up to its original position. The death certificate was still in hand and was still approaching them one step at a time.

"May I have it, please?" Harold asked as he walked over to the figure.

He had just grabbed the certificate when the figure's head rolled back down to the stomach. Pulling the certificate away from the figure, Harold yelped and made a mad dash out of the break room.

"Go, go, go!" Duncan said as they started running around the reception.

A roar was heard and the boys looked over to see the Frankenstein-looking intern had returned. Once again, Duncan gave him a swift kick to the stomach to send him reeling and retreating back into the darkness. Duncan and Harold stopped for a second to catch their breath. Making sure they had what they needed, they proceeded down the hallway.

"_Hey!_"

Duncan yelped while Harold ducked down instinctively. They then looked back up and sighed miserably. They had forgotten all about Noah hanging out in the window above one of the doors. Only now he was without the giant wine glass.

"Have fun," Noah said.

Duncan and Harold ignored him as they continued on through the hallway. There was no sticky floor waiting for them, nor did an empty can fly by unexpectedly. Believing that all possible danger had passed, they descended down the stairs to the first floor.

They turned the corner when Duncan suddenly yelped and Harold screamed while jumping back a step. Ascending the stairs was a bloody looking nurse. The two immediately walked around her after realizing she was doing nothing more than walking straight.

"That was nuts," Harold noted.

The two boys had reached the bottom of the stairs and were about to head over to the front door when they stopped suddenly. They spotted that there was someone trying to hold it shut. A man who was wearing nothing more than a pair of Speedos. While they didn't jump back or scream, Duncan and Harold still found the sight to be rather scary.

"Open it," Duncan demanded as they walked over to open the door. The man laughed while keeping the doors shut. Both boys were starting to get very annoyed at having to struggle to get out of the hospital.

"That is enough, gosh!" Harold nearly yelled.

When they successfully got the doors open, they exited. Duncan then turned and whacked the man on the head with the file and glared at him in anger. Satisfied, the boys started to walk away.

"How irritating..." Duncan muttered as they made their way toward the dormitory.

_BOOM!_

The boys jumped and screamed in horror. An explosion had sounded. And they could feel the heat upon their backs. They looked slight around to see that a nearby ambulance truck had blown up suddenly. Not wanting to stick around any longer, the boys turned and immediately made a mad dash back to the dormitory.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "The boys did manage to get some sleep. I believe five hours worth, if I remember correctly. Then they went through the ceremony of having completed their training with Chef, dressed in a French maid's outfit, trying to give a rousing speech. His goofing up caused the boys to laugh and therefore suffer whacks to the bottom as the no laughing rule was back in effect. Then 9 am came, they crossed the hospital gate and were completely finished with the challenge. Of course, they're going back to the school still in their nurses uniforms since Chef gave Chris the bright idea of putting their clothes back in their rooms. Any way, that's how this failed experiment went down. As for winners and losers, it goes as such. Ezekiel laughed the least, therefore received the least amount of slaps to the butt, which was 127, and was thus the winner of the challenge. I think part of the reason for his not laughing as much was because he wasn't quite familiar with a lot of the cultural stuff that went on, given that he had been home-school pretty much his whole life."

Ezekiel - /_Hesitant to sit down._/ "My b'oot still stin's a l'oot, eh. I'm havin' tr'ooble even standin'."

Jessica - "Second place was very close between Trent and Geoff. In the end, Geoff laughed three more times than Trent, which meant Trent came in second with 156 and Geoff was in third with 159."

Trent - /_Takes deep breaths after sitting down._/ "I'll tell you one thing. I'll take eating bull testicles, jumping out of airplanes and missing the safe zone by three feet, and walking through quicksand over doing that challenge any day of the week."

Geoff - /_Moans as he rubs his bottom._/ "That was beyond harsh, bra. Who could possibly come up with something like that?"

Jessica - "Coming into fourth place was Duncan, having laughed and therefore been butt slapped 172 times. So I guess you can say that he had good reason to play dirty and try to force the others to laugh on purpose."

Duncan - /_Hisses in pain as he sits down._/ "This bites. That challenge completely wore me out worse than any thing that's ever been done in juvie. I am not doing that again. And you know what... thank you, Chris. Thank you very much for cementing a whole new nightmare for me to experience from this day forth... Izzy."

Jessica - "Which means that Harold is unfortunately the loser of this challenge. He came in last place having received a whopping 259 whacks to the butt. In addition to the traps, he largely fell victim to Duncan's dirty tricks. Even the ones that were not targeted at him. He just had the most rotten luck in this one, I'm afraid."

Harold - /_Sighs and then winces in pain._/ "That was brutal. Really brutal. My butt is never going to be the same ever again."

Jessica - "And with that, we conclude this money-spending venture of laughter, torture, horror, and surprises. We will be returning things back to normal very shortly. You can bet that we will definitely not be doing anything like that ever again."

* * *

**Final Butt Slap Count:**

Duncan - 172

Ezekiel - 127

Geoff - 159

Harold - 259

Trent - 156

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, 9 Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

As I was writing the second part of what was expected to be a multi-part challenge, I realized that this was not going to work in full. Largely because there was a lot of filler situations that just were not as fun as a small chunk of other bits. Additionally, I agree with the reviews in that the butt slapping was getting very repetitive. So, as Jessica would say, this was a failed experiment of an idea that seemed like a good idea, but had an immediate crash and burn from the start. I still find the source material to be funny as hell, and I think you guys should check it out on YouTube. But trying to use it using the _Total Drama_ kids just ended up not working.

So I am willingly taking one to the bottom as a result. Send in the Nurses in Black.

**Next Up:** Things return to about as normal as normal can get... in _Total Drama_


	25. Week 8, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Five

**(Week 8, Day 2 - Sunday)**

Chef Hatchet drove the golf cart straight to the front of Riker Hall and dumped the five boys out before any of them could comprehend what was happening. They were just slowly getting to their feet when Chef drove off, leaving them to fend for themselves. Wearing pink nurses uniforms. The boys looked around and noticed that there was no one about within seeing distance. Which was a good thing at the moment. With collective sighs, they turned and walked into their dormitory.

They had barely taken two steps into the living space when they were blinded, albeit briefly, by a flash of light. Once their sense of sight was back to normal seconds later, the five looked to find Gwen sitting on the couch with a big grin on her face. For in her hands was the source of the flash of light. A digital camera.

"Oh sure," Duncan groaned. "Humiliate us even further, why don't you. I bet the Internet would just be exploding seeing the five of us in pink nurses uniforms and wearing fake boobs." Duncan then thought for a moment and looked over at Geoff. Remembering that he was the only one without the fake boobs. "Well... four of us on the latter..."

"Tempting, but I like my idea better," Gwen said. As she continued, she cocked her head to one side of the living space. "I'm blowing this baby up and mounting it on the wall over here. We still need to figure out how we're going to decorate this place and we need more than just a wave machine for Bridge."

"I can only imagine how big it's gonna be," Duncan sighed, hanging his head in the process.

"She is probably going to fill up the entire wall she puts it on," Harold stated with an as-a-matter-of-fact voice.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," Duncan muttered.

Quite suddenly, a blurry flash of blue and yellow appeared for half a second in front of the boys and then disappeared just as quickly. It was followed immediately by a thud and Geoff being out of view. It took the familiar sounds of wet kissing and moaning to let everyone know exactly what happened.

"Look what we have here," Gwen laughed. "Girl on girl action." Trent and Harold were the only other ones to chuckle at the joke. Duncan merely rolled his eyes while Ezekiel looked as he felt. Very confused.

"I d'oon't get it, eh," Ezekiel quipped.

"Ah, don't sweat it, short stuff," Gwen said. She had walked over and rubbed the prairie boy's head as she spoke. "After you spend two years hanging around us freaks, geeks, losers, and weirdos, you'll return home all the more wiser about the outside world than when you first arrived on the island."

"Man it feels good to just laugh when I feel like it," Trent said with a relaxed exhale. "That is one challenge I hope to never have to deal with ever again."

"You can say that again," Harold agreed. "My butt is so sore, I do not know if I am going to be able to sit comfortably for a while."

"How did you guys get involved in the challenge?" Trent asked Gwen. "I thought the rest of you were safe from competing."

"We were," Gwen began to explain. "Chris was looking for volunteers to help out in torturing you guys by offering a hundred bucks per laugh. When I heard about what ideas he had for anesthesiology, I couldn't say no."

"A hundred per laugh?" Duncan noted aloud. He blinked as he did the math in his head and then looked over at the goth girl with a stern glare. "I bet you made off with a lotta money for your part."

"Sorry about your soft little bottom, handsome," Gwen said to Trent, ignoring the punk trying to burn a hole in the back of her head. She wrapped her arms around the music man's neck, who in turn wrapped his arms around her waist. "But being able to release all that frustration I had from the island was worth every dollar for making you boys get whacked."

"Well, it would only seem fair for me to return the favor, beautiful," Trent said with a chuckle, a smirk forming on his lips. "A slap for every whack I got from you sounds reasonable enough to me, don't you think?"

Gwen pretended to think about it, bringing one hand over to lightly tap her chin. "I guess I can work with that," she said in a seemingly sensual tone. "As long as it's not all the ones you got overall."

"Okay, that's it," Duncan grumbled, not caring if any of the others were listening or not. "I'm tired as hell. My butt is extremely sore. Geoff and Bridgette have resumed their never ending game of tonsil hockey. Gwen and Trent are teasing the idea of doing in BDSM. I don't know about the rest of you, but that's more than I can handle for a whole week. I'm going to bed."

Duncan had barely taken two steps when he suddenly found himself standing before Courtney. The question of how exactly she appeared without him noticing was dismissed out of his head, replaced by a sense of concern. She looked far from pleased, given the stern look on her face and her arms crossed over her chest

"And where do you think you're going, Duncan?" Courtney demanded.

"To bed," Duncan replied with a raised brow.

"Like hell you're going to bed right now," Courtney stated. The two stared firmly at one another for what seemed like hours. Then, without warning, Courtney pounced onto Duncan and began to kiss passionately. While not quite at the level of Geoff and Bridgette, their make out was just as intense. She pulled her face away long enough to speak again. "Not before I make you feel all better for having to endure such unjust punishment."

"You're the boss," Duncan responded. The tone in his voice was a slight mixture of chuckling, flirtation, and excitement. Seconds later, the two were kissing again as though their last kiss had been ages ago.

"What's BDSM?" Ezekiel quietly asked Harold curiously.

"You probably do not want to know," Harold replied in a whisper.

"As you should," a familiar voice said. The two turned to see LeShawna approaching them. "Them's a whole lotta freaky that's too much for us regula folks." She stopped right next to Harold and placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "How ya doin', baby? You feelin' okay?"

Harold let out a heavy sigh. "Not really," he admitted. "Some of the shots I got whacked me really hard. And I lost because I laughed more times than the others. I couldn't help myself laughing at seeing William Shatner give Duncan a physical."

"Don't beat yerself too hard on this, sugar," LeShawna said. "I woulda been laughin' my ass off too seein' that punk get messed with like that. You got nothin' to be ashamed of."

As Harold and LeShawna embraced, Ezekiel stood still looking at the scene surrounding him. Bridgette and Geoff were on the floor making out. Duncan and Courtney were making out. Gwen and Trent were in each other's arms, staring into one another's eyes lovingly. And Harold and LeShawna were locked in a romantic hug. Seeing all this love on display made the prairie boy sigh.

"Zeke!" a familiar shriek cried, pulling all of the attention to it.

Too familiar to Ezekiel as he immediately screamed and dropped down to the ground, trying to roll up into a ball and pull his nurse sweater over his head. He then shook and whimpered in fear. He had already been nervous enough being around Izzy. After what happened in the challenge, that nervousness transformed into fright.

"Zeke?" Izzy asked, scratching her head in a bewildered state before hopping up and landing in a cross-legged siting position on the prairie boy's back. "What's wrong with Zeke?"

"What's wrong is that you scared the living hell outta him, crazy girl," Duncan firmly stated.

"How'd I do that?" Izzy asked, seemingly oblivious to how this was the case.

"Oh, it was real simple," Duncan began to explain. "He gets tied down to a table so he can't move, is slowly inserted into the MRI machine, which is a heavily enclosed space to begin with, you're face suddenly appears above him, you're giggling, the table raises on its own, and you plant a kiss on him. That's sure to scare someone as socially handicap as Zeke is."

"Wait a second!" Courtney yelled. She looked far from pleased. "Are you saying that Izzy kissed you too?"

"I got it way worse," Duncan sternly proclaimed. "She tried to slip me the tongue! I'm gonna have nightmares for a very long time because of it. Hell, I had one of it last night."

"Wimp!" Izzy hollered, pointing a finger at the punk for added effect.

"How dare you steal a kiss from Duncan!" Courtney cried. It took all of Duncan's strength to keep her from leaping at the crazy redhead in violent fashion. "I'll tear your eyes out!"

"I didn't scare you, did I Zeke?" Izzy asked in a babying tone. Ezekiel's continued whimpers and his further attempt to shrink into himself gave her an answer she wasn't expecting. The redhead pouted.

"Zeke?" Bridgette asked as she crawled over to be in the prairie boy's line of sight. "Zeke, I'm sure Izzy wasn't trying to scare you at all. She was just trying to make you laugh."

"Regardless, I highly doubt a lot of what happened in the challenge could be looked upon fondly in a positive manner," Harold noted aloud. "While seeing Izzy's face in the MRI machine did make us chuckle, the whole notion of being forced against our will to kiss her left a rather horrifying impression on us."

"Damn, girl," LeShawna said. "That's messed up."

"Let's not forget that the pipsqueak is nervous enough around girls as it is," Duncan added, still trying to hold Courtney back. "Thanks to you, Izzy, I think you just set him back. At this rate, he's never gonna hook up with a girl."

"Dude, that's a harsh thing to say, bra," Geoff said.

"Set him back?" Izzy gasped. She then jumped to her feet with a look of determination on her face. "Unacceptable!" She scooped the prairie boy in her arms, causing him to squeak in terror, and held him while looking as though she was standing at attention. "Izzy will not fail in getting Zeke a girlfriend! Izzy will dedicate herself to make it so!"

"Some one might wanna free Zeke from Izzy's clutches before she does any more damage to him mentally and emotionally," Duncan suggested, still occupied with keeping his girlfriend back.

"That would be me," a new voice announced. Everyone looked over just in time to see Jessica, their Resident Assistant, gently remove the pale white Ezekiel away from Izzy. "After all, he won the challenge and therefore is required to receive his prize. Which will be done privately in the Marshmallow."

"Ooo, a private prize," Izzy mused. "Can I come?"

"No!" Duncan and Courtney yelled at the same time.

"It's called private for a reason, Izzy," Courtney stated. "It means the rest of us don't get to see."

"Aww, poo," Izzy pouted.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Izzy - "Duncan says that I've set Zeke back. I don't think so. Nevertheless, I'm now more determined than ever to get Zeke some lovin'!" /_Pulls out a clipboard and a pen._/ "Now lemme see here... He likes Bridgette, but she's already taken." /_Checks off Bridgette's name on the clipboard._/

Bridgette - "My poor schmoopy-boo! I'm so sorry I intentionally made you laugh so that they would whack your adorable little hiney. I just missed you so much and I wanted to see you in that cute female nurses uniform."

Izzy - "Courtney's taken. Besides, she's too much of a meanie for Zeke to like." /_Checks off Courtney's name._/

Courtney - "What the hell is up with Izzy lately? She's been acting so perverted that it's disturbing. Whenever she and Owen... do it... they literally destroy his room. And now she dares to give Duncan the tongue? Against his will? How dare she get away with that! Only I get to strap him down and force kiss him!"

Izzy - "Gwen's taken. She'd probably scare him any way." /_Checks off Gwen's name._/

Gwen - "Duncan wishes Trent and I engaged in BSDM. I bet he fantasizes about doing that with Courtney on a nightly basis. And if that were the case, I'd have no trouble imagining her being the dominant one."

Izzy - "LeShawna's taken. She'd probably be..." /_Pauses and thinks for a moment._/ "Hmmm... She'd probably be... too much woman for him?" /_Thinks about it and then shrugs before checking off LeShawna's name._/

LeShawna - /_Sighs._/ "We're gettin' there. Gwen is poolin' the money she got from makin' the boys crack up towards the double date. Now we just need a time and place."

Izzy - "Izzy's taken." /_Giggles and then checks off her name._/ "Katie's taken." /_Checks off Katie's name then studies it for a moment._/ "Now why is Katie dating a stupid git like Noah?"

Katie - /_Swoons._/ "He's so handsome."  
Sadie - "Ohmygosh! You're, like, so head over heels for him."  
Katie - "I know, right? But he's just so irresistible. The way he talks, the way he walks, the way he stands, the way he reads."  
Sadie - "He's, like, such a gentleman! EEEEEEEEEE!"  
Katie - "EEEEE-" /_Stops and gasps, then she blushes and bites her bottom lip._/  
Sadie - "Katie?" /_Looks at Katie for a second then gasps._/ "No!" /_Watches Katie nod._/ "Oh! My! God! You're, like, really in love with Noah, aren't you?" /_Resumes squealing._/

Izzy - "Lindsay's taken." /_Checks off Lindsay's name._/ "Besides, he'd have a hard time climbing over those mountains just to even kiss her." /_Cackles at the thought._/ "That leaves Beth, Eva, Heather, and Sadie. I think Cody has his eyes on Beth even though he has hundreds of shirt-ripping fan girls to choose from. Hmmm..." /_Studies the list some more._/ "Maybe I should look outside the box. Too bad Jessica is already taken. Otherwise, I would've put her on the list immediately."

Jessica - "In case you were wondering, Zeke's prize was a nice, private massage from a trio of girls I know in town. After the whipping he suffered from the challenge, I figured it was the least I could do for him winning the damned thing. I have no doubt these girls would make his bottom feel so much better than before."

Ezekiel - /_Relaxes and exhales._/ "S'oo s'ooft..."

Jessica - "And I threw in the same amount Gwen got from making the boys laugh during the challenge as a bonus."

* * *

**(Week 8, Day 3 - Monday)**

**(The Others)**

"Class, I thought today we'd take a break from the tragedy of 'Romeo and Juliet' to discuss the real life tragedy that happened the other night here in Kitchener," the professor announced. Unlike the other English professors at the school, the specific one chosen for the Others preached a lot about sensitivity. To the point that it was really annoying and highly unnecessary. "Let's share out feelings of violation following the loss of our beloved cybercafé, .ca. Who would like to start? Omar?" The professor looked at Owen, but found that the big guy was staring into space. "Omar, did you hear me?"

"You mean Owen?" Geoff noted.

The professor looked at Geoff, blinking once and then raising a confused brow before looking over the seating chart. "Owen, heh," he said, letting out a nervous chuckle. "I'm sorry. You, uh... look like somebody else. What do you have to say about the other night's horrible event?"

"Something horrible happened the other night?" Owen asked in shock.

"Some computer got snagged from the cybercafé across from the school, dude," Tyler explained in a bored tone.

"How did the theft make you feel?" the professor asked.

"Um..." Owen uttered, thinking about how to answer such a tough question. "Sad?"

"Are you asking me or telling me?" the professor questioned further.

Owen blinked and thought about a different answer to use. "Angry?" he asked.

"Hmmm..." the professor sighed aloud. He then turned to another student. "Bridgette, how about you?"

Bridgette merely shrugged and sighed. Like virtually all of the other students, she really did not want to participate all that much in the class. Because it meant the professor would keep talking nonsense. "I think the cybercafé served one very particular segment of the community," she said. "But it still pisses me off when people take what isn't theirs."

"That's how I feel!" Owen proclaimed.

"Thank you, Owen," the professor said with a raised brow. He then turned his attention back to the class. "Bridgette, about that word, 'community.' Isn't that the whole idea of a cybercafé? To jack us into the global community? I think what's most disturbing about this crime is the symbolism involved. Don't you agree, Eva?"

"No," Eva grunted bluntly.

"Suddenly, we're cut off," the professor continued, seemingly ignoring Eva's answer. "We can't hail our friends across the globe and say, 'It's a beautiful day in the cyberhood.' They didn't just take a few computers. They took the symbol of our virtual community. To visit .ca was to come together with the planet!"

"Oh, come on," Heather scoffed.

"Yes?" the professor asked.

"Come together with the planet?" Heather repeated sarcastically. "By staring at a screen for hours? Sitting in a room full of people you never say a word to?"

"Hmmm..." the professor noted, scratching his chin and thinking about what Heather was saying. "Interesting point, Heather. You believe that while connecting Kitchener citizens to our global neighbors, the cafe was alienating us from each other."

Heather rolled her eyes in disbelief and annoyance before giving out a reluctant sigh. "I'm saying if you really miss the place, put a Mr. Coffee in the computer lab," she stated.

"So, in your opinion, what we really need is a return to the traditional coffee house of yore," the professor summarized. "Where you'd watch some performers and share a cup with your friends, face to face."

"Yer a visionary," LeShawna said to Heather sarcastically. Heather sent her a death glare in response.

"Right here and now, let's pledge to make Heather's dream a reality," the professor stated.

"You mean the one where people walking down the street burst into flames?" Duncan asked to numerous chuckles. He too received a death glare from Heather.

"The coffee house!" the professor proclaimed. "We'll plan it, locate it, raise the money, and open it!"

"Would that qualify as an extracurricular activity?" Geoff asked curiously.

"Of course," the professor answered with excitement.

"Then I'd like to register as a conscientious objector," Duncan announced.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Scoffs._/ "Coffee house. My idea? Please. That professor is more wacko than the losers I'm stuck with. What kind of classes does he usually teach? Special ed? This is embarrassment to the nth degree."

Owen - "This professor is so confusing. He asks questions and I give him answers, but he doesn't tell me if I'm right or wrong. That means I don't know if I'm passing is class!" /_Screams in terror._/

Trent - "I think I'm going to have to revise my previous prediction. Instead of the whole school going mental in a month's time, I think it's going to be us as a result of these strange professors they have teaching us."

Duncan - "Bizarre teachers wanting us to express our feelings every single second of the day. Morons like Owen and Lindsay not failing. Yep, I think I'm walking on the edge of sanity here."

* * *

**(Week 8, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

The students all stared at the board. Confusion painted all over their faces. They were asked by the professor to figure out how to solve the equation. Even Izzy and Noah could not figure it out as the students simply sat in their seats with brows raised and their mouths shaped like circles. After it seemed as though hours had passed, the professor spoke with a chuckle.

"Let me show you how to construct the map S, which is the fun of the lemma any how, okay?" he said. He moved over to the bored and pointed out specific points of the equation as he spoke. "So you assume you have an element in the kernel of gamma. That is, an element in C, such that gamma takes you to 0 in C-prime. You pull it back to B, via map G, which is subjective-"

"Hold it, hold it, hold it," Courtney said suddenly, her hand having been raised for effect. "That's... that's not unique."

"Yes, it is unique, Courtney," the professor calmly responded. He then continued to explain the equation. "Up to an element of the image of f, all right? So we've pulled it back to a fixed B here. Then you take beta of B, which takes you to 0 in C-prime, by the commutativity of the diagram. It's therefore in the kernel of the map g-prime, hence is in the image of the map f-prime, by the exactness of the lower sequence..."

"No," Courtney muttered as she aggressively looked through her notes.

"...so we can pull it back..." the professor had continued uninterrupted.

"No," Courtney muttered again, still skimming through her notes.

"...to an element in A-prime-" the professor kept speaking until he truly was interrupted.

"It's not well defined," Courtney stated. He looked up from her notes and pointed at the board with a pencil in hand, as though accusing it over something.

"Which it turns out is well defined modulo the image of alpha," the professor continued to explain calmly. That last statement halted any further attempt by Courtney to question the method of the equation. She and the rest of the students realized just what kind of problem they were dealing with and how unconventional it was. "And thus defines the element in the co-kernel of alpha." After pointing out another point in the equation, the professor drew a snaking line around the numbers. "And that's the 'snake!' And on Monday, we'll address ourselves to the co-homology of groups..." He paused for a moment upon seeing a hand raised before him. "... and Courtney's next objections."

Courtney dropped her hand and pouted in embarrassment while some of the other students chuckled lightly at the comment. The bell rang, signifying the end of the class period, and resulting in the students immediately scooping up all of their belongings and getting out of the room as quickly as possible.

"Maybe you should think carefully about how exactly to question the method of explaining a problem before making a fool out of yourself," Gwen suggested with a smirk on her face.

"Oh, bite me, Gwen!" Courtney hissed.

"I should have known it was the Snake lemma," Izzy proclaimed in a rather excited tone. "That's my kind of homological algebra."

"Why am I not surprised?" Noah questioned sarcastically. "Izzy's fancy perked by something that has any remote form of resemblance or similarities to snakes."

Izzy glared at Noah for a moment. "You're just lucky we're not in a science classroom," she stated. "I know forensic science and I could boil you from the inside out and never leave a trace."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "Okay, so I goofed pretty good in math class. There's nothing wrong with my grades, they're at where I want them to be. But I've been feeling... uncomfortable... from time to time because Izzy and Noah have taken over voicing the answers before the rest of us have time to really digest the problems we're being taught. I'm not used to sitting on the sidelines." /_Thinks for a moment._/ "I wonder if that's how all those students from my previous schools felt when they were in the same classes with me."

Gwen - "Courtney just needs to sit back and relax a little. There's no need to try to compete in getting the answers first under some feeble belief that it will some how help enhance her resume down the road. Not when you've got Izzy and Noah duking it out for one-up's-manship for our pleasure."

Noah - "One would think I'm engaged in this feud of mine with Izzy to prove that I'm smarter than her. That's just part of the reason why. The primary reason is because she's talking when she answers. Having to speak before her is the best way I can think of to keep her yap shut as much as possible during classes."

Izzy - "Milton O'Shaunessey may be the world's most cutthroat corporate raider, but that doesn't mean he's not a fun guy. Like, remember the hostile takeover of the lingerie company? How he called it the panty raid? Hilarious! Milton personally put a thong into each employee's severance envelope. Now that's comedy! Or that other time, when he acquired that brokerage firm after a brutal proxy fight, and promised shareholders he wasn't going to liquidate all the company's assets, and then did it any way? Classic!" /_Sits and smiles in silence for a very long moment, staring at the camera._/ "Well... Maybe you had to be there for that one. But it was really funny at the time."

* * *

**(Week 8, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

"And your professor really wants to go through with the coffee house idea?" Gwen asked with a curious brow raised. She was more interested in the conversation at hand than the lunch that had been rested in front of her for the last five minutes.

"He said that it would 'build character and self-esteem through hard work and cooperation,'" Duncan explained, after which he rolled his eyes. "I get the feeling whatever happened to him as a child that caused him to end up like this is more disturbing than the things Izzy and Owen do alone in the latter's room."

"That is such a beautiful mental image you just painted there, Duncan," Noah noted. "You should be proud of yourself knowing that some of us are going to have a hard time sleeping at night with that thought stuck in our heads."

"At least I won't be the only one, then," Duncan responded. He then felt a sharp elbow to the stomach suddenly. "Ah. What the was that for, Princess?"

"Because now I'm going to have that image in my head too, you pig," Courtney answered sternly.

"Is that so?" Duncan asked with a raised bow. One that was suspiciously sensual in nature. "Perhaps I can help you come up with something better to think about when you sleep at night."

"Can't you think about any thing other than trying to finally get me out of my panties for five seconds?" Courtney nearly cried. Her cheeks were burning bright pink even before she responded to the punk's statement. The shade became deeper upon realizing just how loud she was when she spoke.

"Oh, come on," Duncan said. "I'm trying to be romantic here. Before I can even get the ball rolling, you start objecting. At least try to tease me in some fashion. I mean, look at everyone else around here."

Courtney stared at Duncan for a moment before finally looking around as he suggested. She first spotted Trent and Gwen loosely cuddled up together as they went about eating their lunch. The music man having one arm around the shoulders of the goth girl. Courtney then looked over to see Bridgette and Geoff engaged in what truly was a seemingly never ending session of tonsil hockey, as Duncan would put it. Harold and LeShawna were holding hands, one of their few true moments of affection on display. Lindsay was spoon-feeding Tyler while sitting on his lap. Even Noah had a rather romantic moment of his own going, even if all he was doing was merely eating his lunch while Katie wrapped herself all over one of his arms and kissed his cheek ever two seconds.

Then she found herself suddenly bringing her attention to something very odd. A few tables over, Izzy was standing before a rather frightened looking girl who appeared to be either a freshman or sophomore. What was scaring the girl was how Izzy was literally trying to force an equally scared looking Ezekiel into the poor girl's face.

"You gotta admit that he looks so cute wearing a toque," Izzy stated in a strange attempt to sell her words. "So much so that you'll wanna hug him and squeeze him into itty-bitty pieces!"

"Help me..." Ezekiel squeaked.

"Please," the girl begged, nearly on the verge of tears. "I'm not interested in a boyfriend right now. I'm trying to study for the history exam and I'm really behind."

"That's okay," Izzy proclaimed. "Zeke here is really smart, uh-huh. He can help you with your studies if you ever run into problems. So what do you say, huh?"

"For crying out loud, Izzy!" Duncan yelled. "Leave them alone. Both the girl and Zeke."

"You stay out of this!" Izzy yelled back. She turned back and was shocked to find that the girl she had been speaking to had suddenly disappeared. "Hey, where did she go?" She looked around before turning back to Duncan and looked rather furious. "You scared her off! She could've been Zeke's girlfriend!"

"Can't you take the hint that no girl is going to want to be his girlfriend whenever you're around?" Noah pointed out.

"Blasphemy!" Izzy screamed. As she continued to speak, she started waving Ezekiel around like a rag doll, causing him to turn pale white with sickness. "How dare you condescend my helping poor little Zeke here in getting him some lovin'! You two should be ashamed of yourselves! In fact, your girlfriends should be ashamed of you!"

Courtney and Katie both looked at Izzy with confused brows raised in response.

"Changing the subject quickly," Duncan stated. "Any one hear about that kid that got dropped from the swim team this morning?"

"What about him?" Noah asked, decided very quickly to join the punk to deviating away from the crazy redhead.

"Something about him being caught with a photo of him smoking pot with a group of freshman," Duncan answered. "They're not getting expelled, because of the strike policy and all. But the guy's off the team. Which is funny, too, because he was their best swimmer. To the point that some of the other guys were jealous."

"I can imagine there would be at least one who would be jealous," Noah muttered quietly to himself. He then slowly turned his attention toward Heather, who was sitting alone at her end of the table, eating her lunch.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "Color me curious, but I think this whole Dodekatheon crap is going to be a thorn on our sides for the months to come while we're here. It's bad enough to deal with Heather on her own. Now she has a clique backing her up."

Heather - /_Filing her nails._/ "A real shame for that kid to be caught smoking pot, thereby getting kicked off the swim team. Poseidon said that he had so much talent that was now going to waste."

Ezekiel - /_Worried expression on his face._/ "I d'oon'oo what t'oo d'oo whenever I'm ar'oond Izzy. She's j'oompin' 'oon me and carryin' me ar'oond all 'oover the place, eh. And n'oo she wants t'oo find me a girlfriend. I have this bad feelin' that she g'oona make girls hate me again bec'oose she'll tryin' t'oo f'oorce them t'oo date me against our will. W'oot am I g'oona d'oo, eh?"

* * *

**(Week 8, Day 6 - Thursday)**

"Well, let me be the first to say how glad I am that you people have been able to finally find time away from all the studies, politics, pranks, lip service, and hiding under beds from Izzy so that we can spend the producers' money in decorating this here living space," Gwen announced to Bridgette, Courtney, Duncan, and Ezekiel with a pen and a pad of paper in her hands. "As of right now, we only have two items that for sure will be in here. A wave machine, as suggested by Bridgette. And a nice, blown up portrait of some of the boys looking quite dashing in pink nurses uniforms."

"I can't believe you're actually going to hang that up in here," Courtney said. The tone in her voice made it unclear whether she was upset or amused. Nevertheless, the subject was not discussed any further.

"You sure there's going to be enough space once we get that wave machine in here?" Duncan asked with a curious brow raised. His tone of voice made it seem as though he was trying to make a disapproving statement toward the surfer girl.

"We don't have to make sure there's enough space," Gwen said rather gleefully. "We're not the ones flipping the bill to make this place up. All we're doing is list the decorations that are going in."

"Aren't you just a little concerned about possibly going overboard with all this, Gwen?" Bridgette asked. "I mean, you sound as though you want to go as far as bankrupting the production."

"And that's a bad thing because..." Gwen retorted.

The others stared at Gwen for a moment. It took that one moment for a flood of memories to flash before their eyes. Unpleasant memories that resulted from their time on the island and even at the school.

"I think in this case the bad they've caused outweigh the good," Duncan noted with a shrug.

"It would be nice to come back here every day and enjoy some sort of luxurious peace," Courtney added.

"We c'ood 'oose m'oore c'ootches and chairs, eh," Ezekiel suggested. "There's barely en'oogh seats f'oor the five 'oof 'oos."

"Good point, Zeke," Gwen said, writing down the suggestion onto the notepad. "We should look up some really comfortable couches and chair sets. Throw in a few coffee tables while we're at it."

"Well, since we're in the spirit of blowing someone else's money, I suggest a big screen TV to put Owen's to shame and a PS3," Duncan declared. "Just so the rest of the guys can play and lose to me and Zeke."

"B'oot I still d'oono h'oow t'oo play, eh," Ezekiel noted in a slight whimper.

"Trust me," Duncan said. "You'll get plenty of practice through us before the present term ends."

"Okay," Gwen said, scribbling some more on the notepad. "Giant widescreen TV with a PS3. If you boys are going to bash each other in through multiplayer games, we might as well add multiple controllers and multiple copies of such games. You can get me a list of games you boys plan on playing, right Duncan?"

"Sure," Duncan replied with a shrug.

"You know, the PS3 plays Blu Ray movies," Bridgette noted. "Maybe we can throw in some movies that we can watch."

"Write down a list and we'll add them to the budget," Gwen said. She then turned to Courtney. "You got a suggestion we can run with in decorating this place, Courtney?"

Courtney thought for a moment, tapping her chin periodically. "Well..." she began to say. And then she shrugged. "We might as well throw in a Jacuzzi. What with all the luxury we already have listed."

"Only seems reasonable," Gwen agreed, writing down the suggestion on the notepad. "So we got a wave machine, blown up picture of the boys in drag, a lotta couches and chairs long with coffee tables, giant widescreen TV with PS3, and a Jacuzzi. I think we're off to a good start indeed."

"You want to add more?" Courtney asked. "You just listed what could seriously be the dream living space of any and all college dormitories. Except for the picture, that's only for girl dorms."

"Like I said, we're not paying for it," Gwen said with a wicked grin. "We should take full advantage of this opportunity to blow the production's money while we have the chance."

"You're just really hoping that by doing this we're gonna diminish Chris' pay, aren't you," Bridgette pointed out.

"That would be the goal," Gwen admitted shamelessly.

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

Well, I certainly enjoyed my little break. A bunch of stuff going on at work, my brother got married, and there was Comic Con. The latter two were a huge blast. That's a lot of things taking time away from writing stories, including this one. But, I managed to finally get this sucker together. And the next one will hopefully be a doozy.

So far, I'm enjoying _Total Drama World Tour_ a bit. I think they managed to figure out what didn't work with _Total Drama Action_ and as a result are making a far better outing with the third season. Although there are hints of what's coming up that make me concerned they're going to jump right back into the pitfall they did in _TDA_ for the sake of making drama, the one thing that I felt clearly didn't work the most.

In the meantime, **keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with. Remember, Confession Cam I'm open for suggestions. The living space I'm working up on my own.

**Next Up:** Jessica takes over Challenge Night


	26. Week 8, Part 4

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Six

**(Week 8, Day 7 - Friday)**

"Hello, everyone," Jessica announced to the packed audience. "I'm Jessica, the Resident Assistant at Riker Hall, and I will be the host for tonight's Challenge Night here in The Marshmallow." The audience cheered wildly nonetheless. "As such, we're going to do things a little different with me in charge. For starters, the advantage and disadvantage handicaps will be lifted. It will be an even playing field for our twenty-two competitors tonight."

"Yes!" Harold quietly cheered, letting out a sigh of relief and a short fist pump.

"But therein lies the twist," Jessica continued. "To compensate the elimination of the handicaps tonight, the competitors will not know what it is they are getting themselves into. They will be going in blind to what it is they are doing and what they are supposed to do to earn victory." The audience let out interested murmuring while the twenty-two students on the stage looked rather nervous and uncomfortable with this development. "So without further ado, let the mystery contest begin."

Before any of the students could react, the stage hands who all look suspiciously like Mr. Black appeared behind then and threw black hoods over their heads. They then picked up the students and carried them off of the stage. After waiting a few moments in silence, Jessica turned to the audience with a grin on her face.

"Now that the competitors are out of hearing range, I can fill the rest of you restless voyeurs on the details for tonight's challenge," she announced to thunderous cheers. "If you recall, you all were asked quietly to pick up the voting devices underneath your seats and vote for unique pairs amongst the competitors. What you were doing was determining who will be partnered with who in the challenge. If my calculations are correct, they should be arriving at their destinations right about..."

* * *

**(Room 1)**

"Attention occupants," a computerized voice spoke overhead, spooking the two bodies in the room. "Your challenge has officially begun. You may now remove the hoods from over your heads."

The first body nervously did as instructed. Once the hood was gone, the body adjusted to the brightness of the room before coming upon the second figure. After being able to see clearly, the first body screamed in horror.

"What the hell, Geoff?" Eva grunted.

"Sorry, dudette," Geoff whimpered. "But this is way too freaky."

"What do you mean?" Eva grumbled with an annoyed brow raised.

"Well, I'm in a room," Geoff began to explain in short sentences. "Alone. With you. And everything? Is pink."

"Pink?" Eva repeated in disbelief. She then looked around the room. Sure enough, everything was pink. Pink walls. Pink bed. Pink pillows. Pink bedsheets. Pink chairs. Pink table. Pink flowers. Pink bear plushies. Pink heart cushions.

...

Pink heart cushions?

"What the hell kind of challenge is this?" Eva roared.

* * *

"Oh, about those unique pairs you guys voted for," Jessica stated in a manner-of-fact tone. "You've probably guessed by now, but what you were voting for was who you would like to see as a couple if they weren't already going out with someone. Meaning those mixed up pairs will be in the same room together." The audience cheered in delight. The girls, in particular, were squealing.

* * *

**(Room 2)**

"Like, oh my gosh!" Sadie squealed. "These bear plushies are so cute!" She immediately scooped up the object and embraced it with all her might as though to loosen her grip would be to lose it for good.

"It sure is pink in here," DJ noted, scratching his head as he looked around. "I gotta say, it's a lot more pink than your's and Lindsay's room. And I didn't think that be possible."

"You're right!" Sadie gasped in shock. "I should, like, so get tips from whoever designed this room. Lindsay and I could, like, totally redecorate our room in the same fashion."

"Um..." DJ managed to utter with a concerned brow raised and then shrugged. "If you say so."

* * *

**(Room 3)**

"So you're a girl, right," Tyler said. "And you're practically attached to the hip to Sadie, right. Who's Lindsay's roomie, right. And their room is kinda like this, right. Which stands to reason that you have similar tastes to this, right."

"Uh huh," Katie responded to each statement, adding a nod as she went along.

"So you think you can, like, give me tips and stuff?" Tyler finally asked. "You know, to please Linds and all."

"Aww, that is, like, so cute of you," Katie cooed. "Just like my Noah-bear, who, like, always seems to know what stuff I like and, like, gift-wraps each one he gives me every weekend."

"Braniac does that?" Tyler asked in surprise with a brow raised. "Whoa! I'm so behind on this being an awesome boyfriend if he's doing that for you." He starts to frantically look around the room. "Where's a pen and paper? I need to know stuff from you about Linds so I can get her gifts on a weekly basis!"

Katie giggled. "You're, like, being so adorable right now," she said. "Lindsay must, like, really like you being her boyfriend and all."

* * *

**(Room 4)**

"Aww," Lindsay cooed as she picked up a bear plushie. "These are, like, so precious! This one kinda looks like Tiger."

"Who's Tiger?" Owen asked curiously.

"My boyfriend, silly," Lindsay giggled.

"Tiger's your boyfriend?" Owen questioned further in confusion. "But I thought Tyler is your boyfriend."

"Tyler is Tiger," Lindsay explained. Then she paused and thought about it for a moment. "At least I think so."

"Wait a minute," Owen said in a panic. "If Tyler is Tiger... then who's Terrance?"

"He's Tyler's roommate," Lindsay answered. "Isn't he?"

"But I thought Trent was Tyler's roommate," Owen said. He started to get really worried. "Now I'm really confused!"

"Me too," Lindsay said in a scared tone.

* * *

**(Room 5)**

"Ya frontin' me, right?" LeShawna asked with a curious brow raised.

"No, I'm not," Cody said in a near panic. "I really, really, really need advice on how to go about dating a girl. More specifically, how a guy like me goes about dating a girl. After all... Harold's dating you."

"And you think there's some sorta burnin' about how geeky boys can go about gettin' sugar, is that it?" LeShawna questioned further. She was looking at him in unamused disbelief.

"Yeah..." Cody sheepishly replied.

"Dude, you got lotsa girls willin' ta date you," LeShawna stated. "Ya don't need me ta tell you how to attract one."

"But those girls... scare me," Cody whimpered. "Especially that one girl who doesn't even go to the school, but manages to some how get on campus any way."

"You mean that crazy girl who runs all those blogs about us on the 'net?" LeShawna asked. She thinks about the subject for a moment and then shakes her head. "Damn dude, she's got it hard for you. But if ya ain't gonna go for any of the girls like her, whatcha need advice about gettin' a girl for any way."

Cody didn't immediately respond. Instead, he shyly looked away and tapped his fingers. This was all that LeShawna needed to see to understand what he was really trying to ask her.

"You already have a girl in mind ya wanna date," she declared. "Whatcha really wanna know is how ta go about askin' that girl out since it was my honey buns who wooed me into his skinny lil' arms and therefore wanna know how you can do the same for this mystery girl you like." She began to laugh unintentionally at the humor of the situation. "Boy, you crazy."

* * *

**(Room 6)**

"This has to be some kind of cruel joke," Heather fumed. "Of all the pathetic morons to pair me up with, I'm stuck with you? In a room that is decorated like this?"

"I don't like this any more than you do," Harold stated. "I mean, gosh! You're the least likable person in the entire group."

"I would say the same thing about you," Heather retorted. "But you managed to some how date that Big-butted, loud-mouthed, mall-shopping, homegirl prima ballerino."

"Don't you dare call her names, dang it!" Harold sternly demanded. He raised his arms up as if getting ready to engage in a fight with the other. "I have no problem resorting to violence to defend LeShawna's honor."

"What honor could you possibly be defending?" Heather questioned in an unimpressed manner. "And like I'm going to be afraid of you just because you attacked Courtney first when you actually fought a girl last. You probably hit like one any way."

* * *

**(Room 7)**

"Um... hi..." Beth uttered nervously. She gave out a light wave and then pulling it back sheepishly, as if having even attempted to do so in the first place was embarrassing.

"Hey," Justin merely muttered with a sigh. He was propped up in a nearby chair, slumped over with his fist gently holding his head up. And looking very bored indeed.

Beth coughed and swallowed. "So, uh..." she managed to say before reverting back to a moment of silence, twiddling her thumbs along the way. "What have you been up to?"

"Nothing much," Justin replied with a shrug.

What he did not want to speak aloud was how he was planning numerous ways to woo the elected Vice President of the school's student council, Janet, before DJ had a chance to. Instead, he was stuck in a challenge he knew nothing about. In addition, he was now in a room decked out in a romantic design with a girl who unfortunately was slowly falling under the natural charms his body gave off without him having to do any sort of effort. Which only further drove his desire to get done this challenge over with as quickly as possible so that he could go forth in claiming Janet's affections.

"Cool..." Beth uttered. She then took a deep breath and buried her face in her hands.

She thought she would be able to go two minutes without letting Justin's natural charms get to her. What was she going to do if he was nearby whenever she wanted to be alone with a certain techno-geek.

* * *

**(Room 8)**

No matter what, Ezekiel kept his toque pulled down tightly over his eyes. For no reason would he lift them up. He was going to maintain a strong hold for as long as the challenge lasted. Which was a very difficult goal to achieve given how badly he was shaking with fear and the person he was paired in the room with.

"Come on, Zeke," Bridgette said gently. "There's nothing to be afraid of. I'm sure this challenge is not as bad as you're making it out to be, okay? No need to pull your toque down to the point of almost ripping it over your head."

"I d'oon't wanna, eh..." Ezekiel whimpered.

"Please, Zeke?" Bridgette asked softly. "It's just pink colors and a few plushies and cushions. There's nothing too suggestive to make you think we have to do any thing more than just talk."

"It's t'oo tempting..." Ezekiel muttered.

Bridgette sighed. "Are you still worried that Geoff might get mad at you if, God forbid, we did any thing like kiss?" she asked. She barely finished the question when she watched Ezekiel roll himself even further into a ball. She sighed again. "Zeke, don't worry. Even if we were forced to kiss for some strange reason, I'm quite positive Geoff won't be mad."

* * *

**(Room 9)**

"I don't get this one bit," Courtney stated. "I mean, I think I have an idea about what the challenge is. What I don't get is the pairing. It would make just a little more sense if it had been me and Harold because of our arguments these last few weeks. Or even Noah given that he's the closest to being similar to me. But pairing me with you?"

"Your guess is as good as mine," Trent said with a shrug. "I'm just glad I'm not paired with Heather. That would not be cool in any sense of the imagination given what happened on the island."

Courtney sighed and thought some more on the subject while Trent leaned back in a chair with his feet propped upon the table. He hummed a seemingly random tune while Courtney paced around, tapping her chin with a free index finger.

"Maybe it's some weird, morbid idea on compensation," Courtney proclaimed. Upon seeing the confused brow Trent raised, she gladly explained. "I can only assume this, but I believe that we were paired is because it sets up some strange sense of commonality. If there was any pairing in which the two persons were seemingly possible due to similarities it would be your girlfriend and my boyfriend, Gwen and Duncan. Therefore, the commonality would be to assume that you and I would be jealous and therefore bond together out of that feeling of betrayal. Hence the idea of compensation."

"So in other words, they paired us together because they paired Gwen and Duncan together," Trent summarized what Courtney had said. He thought about it for a moment and then nodded. "I guess I can see that. They do tend to enjoy each other's company every once in a while at random times."

"But I'm still surprised that they still paired me with you, though," Courtney said. "I mean, if I recall from those blogs that strange raven-hared girl posts for all of us, you're way far down the poll of probable other boyfriends for me."

"Gee, thanks," Trent said sarcastically.

"Hey, that stuff is not my cup of tea," Courtney said in defense. "Any ways, for sure it seemed like people wanted to pair me with Harold out of some lame imagination of our fighting would bring us together." She froze in place suddenly and groan. "Why am I even thinking about this? It's all so stupid!"

* * *

**(Room 10)**

"Don't give me that, you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!" Izzy stated firmly. "Your type really makes me puke. You vacuous, coffee-nosed, malodorous, pervert!"

"Okay, first of all, since when have I ever been considered a pervert?" Noah questioned sternly with his arms crossed. "Second, how do you suddenly go to that while in the middle of explaining the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow for some reason?"

"What do you mean?" Izzy asked with a brow raised. "An African or European swallow?"

"Does it really matter?" Noah questioned in return with annoyance in his tone.

"Of course it does," Izzy declared. "Because an African swallow might carry a coconut, but not a European swallow." She paused and thought about the subject for a second. "But then, of course, African swallows are not migratory. So they couldn't bring a coconut into England any way."

"There you go again," Noah scoffed. "Now you're just jumping from the middle of one subject to the middle of another for no good reason. Next thing you'll know, you'll just be conversing with yourself."

"Wait a minute!" Izzy cried. "Supposing two swallows carried it together! They'd have to have it on a line, but it would be simple. They'd just use a standard creeper. Would probably have to be held under the dorsal guiding feathers, but why not?"

Noah slapped a hand upon his forehead and groaned.

* * *

**(Room 11)**

"How much more cliche can you get than pairing you and me together," Gwen stated. "We have similar tastes, we have similar attitudes, we have similar forms of expression. Seriously, can't these people try any harder to come up with crack pairings?"

"What's the point of discussing it?" Duncan asked. The two were sitting on the floor with their backs leaned up against the other. "I hate the notion any way. Some of the more bizarre ideas are just too weird for me to even wrap my head around."

"You mean like that one of you and LeShawna?" Gwen teased.

"I'm not lying when I say that there are individuals out there who actually like the idea of me paired with Katie," Duncan said.

"You and Katie?" Gwen questioned with a confused brow raised. "Okay, that's just plain mental. Even for me."

"Ready for a nightmare?" Duncan asked, this time in a teasing tone of his own. "There are those who want to pair you with Chris."

"Are you kidding me?" Gwen nearly cried. "Me and Chris? After all he did to us on the island and still likes to do here whenever he gets the chance? What's their damage?"

"See what I mean when I said there was no point in discussing this?" Duncan questioned.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Crazy girl has been all over my case about how I've been snappy at every one and every thing since she tried to tongue me in the last challenge. Of course I'm gonna get snappy after that. You don't need a rocket scientist to figure that out. Just like you don't need one to summarize that I've got this great big grudge against her because of it. So we ended up settling on a bet. If I do better than her in this upcoming challenge, she doesn't get to speak for an entire week. That mouth is zipped shut. If she some how does better than me, she gets to slap me whenever she likes for a whole week. Ain't no way I'm losing this one. She's as good as mute when all is said and done."

Izzy - "Being a sperm whale in today's economy can be difficult. And that's why I've written '_Hailton J. Farber's Guide to Being a Sperm Whale in Today's Economy._' In the book, I provide a number of money-saving tips, including tasty squid recipes for cetaceans on a limited budget! And the chapter entitled 'Equatorial Mating on 30 Dollars a Day' speaks for itself! You've got the largest brain of any animal on Earth, friend... use it! Buy this book and save big!" /_Pulls out a heavy, cover-less book and holds it up to the camera._/ "I'm so confident you'll love this book that if it doesn't help you be a sperm whale in today's economy... I'll blow a porpoise!" /_Cackles as she drops the book onto the make-up cabinet._/

* * *

"I believe our pairs have had ample time to get acquainted with one another, don't you agree?" Jessica announced. The response she received was a roar of cheering that made it clear they agreed with her. "So let's really make this challenge interesting by spicing things up a bit. Chef, if you will please."

The audience sounded their awe as Chef rolled out a series of gas tanks. Each tank had a tube connected that was making its way upward to above and beyond the ceiling over the stage. Chef stopped pushing the tanks right next to Jessica.

"The goal of the challenge to see if our lovely pairs can resist kissing one another the longest," Jessica began to explain. "Under normal circumstances, we'd probably have a twenty-two-way tie. So we are introducing this wonderful little gas into the equation. As developed by a certain former associate of mine, this non-toxic gas in the equivalent of being shot by an arrow from Cupid. Any one breathing in the fumes instantly falls in love with the first person whose presence they recognize. Thus making the ability to achieve the objective that much more difficult."

Jessica gently turned the handles of each tank. This caused the gas to flow through the tubes and into the eleven rooms above. Within a matter of seconds, the unsuspecting contestants would be breathing in the gas. And fall in love with the person sharing the room with them. The audience gasped with great interest.

"So it goes that this challenge is known by a better name," Jessica concluded. "Heartbreak Hotel."

* * *

**(Room 1)**

"Just sit there, shut up, and don't look at me," Eva ordered from one corner of the room.

"Okay, okay," Geoff said from another corner of the room. "I got it, dudette."

"And stop calling me that," Eva demanded, dropping down into a sitting position and crossing her arms.

"Sheesh, fine," Geoff responded, himself dropping to a sitting position. "Don't want me to be nice, that's cool."

The two sat in silence for a long moment. Turning their heads so that they would not look at one another. Completely unaware that a gas had been released into the room. And seconds later they were breathing in the nearly invisible fumes. Without realizing it, or even comprehending it, they were starting to grow attracted to one another for no logical reason.

"Nice hat," Eva uttered rather quietly.

"Thanks," Geoff responded. "I like your eyebrow."

"Both of them?" Eva asked.

"You have more than one?" Geoff questioned.

* * *

**(Room 2)**

"So cute these teddy bears are," Sadie said in a dreamy tone.

"All animals are cute," DJ said in a dreamy tone of his own.

The effects of the gas having kicked in very quickly on the both of them.

"So cuddly and fuzzy and soft," Sadie added with a giggle. By now under a complete, romantic daze.

"Yeah," DJ responded, himself under a complete, romantic daze. "Fuzzy wuzzy."

* * *

**(Room 3)**

"There's, like, nothing to it," Katie spoke. Even if she had not inhaled the non-toxic fumes being pumped into the room, she would have been in the romantic daze she was in. "All you have to do is, like, so be yourself."

"But, I've been doing that to the max," Tyler responded. Him being in a romantic daze was one for the books. Making him less like an athlete and more like Fabio. "There's gotta be more I should do, right? I mean, you mentioned earlier how Noah would give you gifts and stuff. How do I do that?"

"Oh, that's so easy, silly," Katie said with a giggle. "You just need to, like, get her something you know she's gonna so love. Like a puppy. Sadie, like, told me that Lindsay so loves puppies."

"But... she already has a puppy, I think," Tyler said. The influence of the gas was keeping him from sounding as pathetic and sorrowful as his statements would have otherwise made him felt. He was feeling all so happy and on cloud nine. "Do I really have to buy her another puppy?"

* * *

**(Room 4)**

The non-toxic gas hardly needed to make Owen and Lindsay feel positive and upbeat. Though it did little to help settle the drastic situation they were in. Regardless of how happy they came off as.

"But you're not Izzy," Owen said. "Right?"

"My name is not Ivy, silly," Lindsay said in response. "It's Lindsay."

"Who's Ivy?" Owen asked.

"She's your girlfriend, right?" Lindsay asked.

"I thought Izzy was my girlfriend," Owen said.

"That's what I meant," Lindsay said. "Ingrid."

* * *

**(Room 5)**

"I know whatcha doin', shorty," LeShawna said. Even in a romantic daze, she was the same sista every in the group knew and was beloved. "You tryin' ta look for Ms. Right combined with Ms. Right Now."

"I am?" Cody questioned. "Golly. I never really thought of it that way."

"You so desperate for a girlfriend, yet you as picky as Heather with her lunch," LeShawna added. "What you need to do is just go up to this girl you like and ask her out already. If she accepts, good for you. If not, there's still plenty of fishes in the sea."

"But I don't have to choose from those girls who are trying to climb into my room, right?" Cody asked.

* * *

**(Room 6)**

The gas had yet to enter the room Harold and Heather occupied. The two sat in silence, looking away from one another. However, there was only so much silence both of them could take.

"So," Heather muttered. "Not that I really care, I just hate absolute silence." She took a deep breath and proceeded to regret herself for opening her mouth. "Any chance of ever breaking out the L-word to your girlfriend?"

"L-word?" Harold asked in a confused manner.

"The L-word, doofus," Heather repeated.

"_Lesbian_?" Harold questioned.

Heather rolled her eyes and groaned. "The other L-word, moron," she stated.

Harold thought for a moment and scratched his head. "... _Lesbians_?" he asked.

Heather slapped her forehead in annoyance. Harold shrugged and looked away. His timing could not have been any more spot on as he noticed there was something being pumped into the room. Something that was light pink. What was supposed to be a gasp ended up being a deep breath he took. Then another. Then another. This went did not go unnoticed by Heather.

"What are you doing now?" Heather asked.

Harold, desperately trying not to open his mouth, frantically pointed at the air vent. Heather sighed and looked over. Her eyes shot wide open in horror upon seeing the gas. When the color of the gas had registered, she knew immediately exactly what kind of gas it was. More specifically, what breathing it in would do. She took a quick deep breath and prayed desperately that she did not inhale the fumes. After all, she was well acquainted with the girl who invented it.

* * *

**(Room 7)**

The gas did little to help Beth in terms of her falling under the natural charms he radiated. It only intensified it. The gas did manage to force Justin to actually project himself in some bizarre attempt to act attractive toward someone.

"So what do you like to eat?" Beth managed to ask in a dreamy tone.

"Garlic bread is my favorite food," Justin stated in a rather proud voice, beating his chest lightly. "I could honestly eat it for every meal. Or just all the time without even stopping."

"You'd get fat," Beth noted, still maintaining her dreamy tone.

"No I wouldn't," Justin said, hardly sounding as offended as he otherwise would have been.

"You'd get totally fat," Beth nearly squealed.

"I don't think I'd get fat," Justin said with a hearty laugh. "Why would I get fat?"

"Bread makes you fat," Beth replied.

A hint of surprise actually emerged in Justin ever slightly from the effects of the gas. "_Bread makes you fat?_" he gasped.

* * *

**(Room 8)**

With the gas in full effect in the room, Ezekiel no longer had a grip on his toque. It was still pulled down enough to cover his eyes, but he was too much in a daze to even care. He was focused far too much on the fact that Bridgette ran a finger around and around the rim of his toque. And he liked it a lot.

"You still have a crush on me, don't you," Bridgette noted in a dreamy tone.

"A'yup," Ezekiel responded. Becoming more and more infatuated.

"How did it start?" she asked.

"When y'oo arrived at Playa Des L'oosers," he replied.

"When I arrived?" she repeated, followed by a slight giggle. "But I was a mess."

"After y'oo cleaned 'oop," Ezekiel clarified. "Y'oo gave me a h'oog, eh. And I liked y'oor smell."

"The smell was probably from all those cleaning products I had to use, hon," Bridgette reasoned with a slight giggle.

"Y'oo still smell pretty," Ezekiel said, followed by his own slight giggle.

"Aww, that's so sweet of you," Bridgette said.

* * *

**(Room 9)**

Even though the gas was causing Courtney to fall into a romantic daze, it did little to keep her from shutting up. What was also unfortunate was that the effects prevented Trent from reacting in negative fashion. As a matter of fact, the fumes was also causing him to talk endlessly as though it were part of some strange romantic act in courting Courtney. And for some reason, it was working. But by this point, both of them were talking absolute nonsense.

"I still can't believe Peter went ahead and asked Rebbecca out!" Courtney ranted. "After I specifically told him not to do that! What a complete ass! If he hurt's her, so help me-"

"What?" Trent mused aloud. "They went together somewhere? How does Penny know Amanda? What the hell is going on with that? I totally forgot to ask!"

"And furthermore," Courtney proclaimed. "My best friend, who he knows as his ex-girlfriend-"

"This is so messed up," Trent uttered. "How do they know each other? And I told Penny about..." Paused and thought for a moment, tapping his chin. "Oh, man... I don't know about this!"

"Well, she's back in town," Courtney stated. "And she was asking for his new number, which I was reluctant to give out, for the obvious reason that he's a total jerkwad, and-" Courtney stopped rather suddenly and looked over at Trent. She blinked for a moment and then drew a seductive smile on her face. "Are you even listening?"

"_La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la,_" Trent sang. Neither one knew where the guitar he was strumming came from.

* * *

**(Room 10)**

Noah had recognized the gas the second the first sight of pink mist entered into the room. He took a deep breath and immediately covered both his mouth and his nose. Unfortunately for him, Izzy took no notice of this and was inhaling the fumes as freely as if she were breathing normal air. To say he was scared of the effects they were having on her would be an understatement.

"_Sit on my face and tell me that you love me!_" Izzy sang off key.

As she sang, she started dancing. It was far from hypnotic given that it resemble any thing but a graceful ballet. Noah was doing all he could to keep his hands clinched upon his mouth and nose while maintaining a struggling hold of his breath.

"You must be wondering what kind of dance I'm doing," Izzy said in a dreamy tone. "I'll explain, Noah. A year and a bit ago, I was flabby, overweight, and, it griefs me to say so, deeply unattractive."

Noah knew she was just spewing out whatever random thought came off the top of her head. Unfortunately for him, he could say nothing about it under the circumstances.

"Since then, a friend put me onto dancercises," the crazy redhead continued happily. "I won't tell you who this friend was, but if I dropped the hint that it was a prominent quantity surveyor I think you will probably guess. He put me onto dancercising and I think it was probably the most valuable thing he's ever done in his otherwise futile and squalled life."

Izzy continued to dance about and around Noah. The egghead considered shutting his eyes, but knew that he was exerting too much energy trying desperately not to breath. Trying to keep his eyes closed would only hamper his predicament. Izzy finally came to a stop, her face mere inches away from his.

"The key to dancercise is the rather ingenious coupling of the word 'dance' to the word 'circumcise'," Izzy stated with a giggle.

Noah was sure this whole display was going to haunt his dreams tonight. He was also pretty sure that Izzy was more than likely not going to remember a single thing from all of this.

* * *

**(Room 11)**

"So how exactly did you folks react to you dating a Type A like Courtney," Gwen asked in a seductive tone.

"Oh, those were fun times," Duncan replied with a light chuckle. Both were still sitting back to back against one another, but were constantly looking over their shoulders at one another. "The conversation I had with my mom? Classic."

"I bet I know how it went," Gwen said with a slight giggle. "She probably went something like, 'What's this I hear about you dating a nineteen-year-old?' Am I right?"

"Something like that," Duncan replied with another chuckle. "'She's sixteen, mom. And how do you know?'"

"'Your brother Dean told me,'" Gwen said, continuing to act like Duncan's mother.

"'That gossipy bitch!'" Duncan declared, playing along.

"'Yeah,'" Gwen continued. "'Scandal!'"

"'Whatever,'" Duncan said.

"'Don't you whatever me, young man!'" she stated in a mock authoritative tone. "'Now, who is this mystery girl?'"

"'Gwen,'" Duncan answered.

This caught Gwen off guard a little. "Wait, '_Gwen_'?" she said. "You used my name?"

Duncan sighed with a chuckle mixed in. "You're not gonna believe this," he said. "But I was too embarrassed to let them know everything about Court. Even her name."

"So they really don't know you're going with a Type A?" Gwen asked.

"Nope," Duncan replied. "All they know is I'm dating an artistic goth chick."

"Haven't they watched the show?" Gwen questioned further. "See for themselves what kind of girl your eyes really are for?"

"Like hell they would," Duncan answered. "It's bad enough seeing my mug on TV everytime I'm vandalizing some old folks home. Last thing they want to see is me screwing around with a buncha kinds my age."

"So why pick me when you told your folks?" Gwen continued to ask.

"You're the only type they'd believe I'd ever go out with," Duncan replied with a shrug.

"Because it would make sense," Gwen added. "We're alike, you and I."

"Very much alike," Duncan responded with a wicked grin.

* * *

"If this game were run by Chris, he would probably put on some cheap set of love songs," Jessica noted to the crowd. "Probably some sexy modern stuff, as a matter of fact. But like many of you watching out there, there are certain singers out there whose music would cause any and every person under the effects of the gas to go insane with love. So let's see how far they can go when I put on some Marvin Gaye."

Nearly all the females in the audience squealed and screamed passionately. Even Chef was delighted, knowing full well how effective the songs Jessica began to play were in romantic settings. In fact, the whole crowd within The Marshmallow cheered after hearing the opening notes to "Let's Get It On." Chef started dancing to the music. Seconds later a buzzer sounded.

"And we have our losers!" Jessica announced. "As we speak, the sprinkler system in their room has been activated. Then the floor will suddenly open, dropping the two down a shoot. On the way down, they will be splashed with Mountain Dew and ice cold water before arriving here on our stage. The primary ingredients used to cure the effects of the gas."

Two figures suddenly fell from the ceiling and onto the stage. Their eyes had been shot wide opening, primarily from being jolt to consciousness by the Mountain Dew and ice cold water that had been splashed upon them. The two then began to cry, but not for what would have seemed like the obvious reason.

"My hair is all sticky!" Lindsay cried.

"I didn't get to taste any Mountain Dew on the way down!" Owen sobbed.

"Sorry, you two," Jessica said to them. "But you kissed first. Therefore, you guys will have to deal with whatever disadvantage Chris gives you in next week's challenge."

Both stopped crying and thought for a moment. They looked over at Jessica, wondering if what they had heard her say was exactly what she had meant. Happy to oblige, she pointed to the big screen on the stage as it replayed in slow-motion Lindsay and Owen giving one another a small, yet gentle kiss that resulted in their loss. Upon seeing this, the two started crying again. This time for the obvious reason. They stopped and gasped when another buzzer sounded.

"And the couple that came in tenth place?" Jessica announced. She paused until the pair dropped down onto the stage. Both newly arrived figures ended up crashing upon Owen and Lindsay. "DJ and Sadie."

"I'm so sticky!" Sadie cried. "I, like, got splashed with a lotta Mountain Dew! It's so gross!"

"I dunno about y'all, but what's with the Marvin Gaye?" DJ asked curiously. Jessica showed them footage on the big screen of DJ and Sadie kissing in slow-motion. DJ watched this and sighed. "Aw, man. Mama's not gonna like this."

The buzzer sounded again.

"Our couples are dropping like flies," Jessica stated. Moments later, the ninth place couple dropped from the ceiling and onto the stage. "Well, what do you know. It's Bridgette and Zeke."

"Can some one splash some more water on us?" Bridgette practically begged. "I don't think there was enough water used to wash off the Mountain Dew. And I'm not going to like what happens when it starts to dry up."

"What happened, eh?" Ezekiel asked rather desperately. "H'oow did we end up all sticky an' wet?"

Jessica pointed their attention to the big screen. And they watched as the footage showed, in slow-motion, Ezekiel and Bridgette kissing rather sweetly. Bridgette's first reaction was to gasp. Ezekiel turned white, wobbled, and then fell back into a faint.

"Zeke?" Bridgette asked quietly. She was about to bend down over the unconscious prairie boy when a buzzer sounded, nearly scaring her as she literally hopped back.

"Let's see which pair came in eighth place," Jessica announced. Seconds later, two figures fell from the ceiling and landed on the others. Jessica took a good look and turned back to the audience. "Tyler and Katie."

"I'm a horrible girlfriend!" Katie cried as she wrapped herself in an embrace with her would-be twin Sadie. "I kissed another guy! Noah's gonna break up with me!"

"Tiger!" Lindsay cried, literally jumping onto her jock boyfriend. "I'm all sticky and my hair is getting mushed together! And it's drying up! Please do some thing!"

"Don't worry, Linds," Tyler proclaimed, scooping his blonde girlfriend up in his arms as he got to his feet. "I'll wash your hair!" He immediately began to run off stage. Only he managed to get in two steps before slipping on the wet stage floor and falling onto his back. The momentum caused the two to slide off of the stage and into the back, screaming all the way before crashing.

"Guess they ain't bothered by what happened up there?" DJ noted aloud with a shrug.

The buzzer sounded again.

"It's a good thing yer breakin' them kids outta the effects, Jessica," Chef called through his dancing. "This song been known to cause overpopulation." Seconds later, two more figures dropped onto the stage.

"Here's our seventh place pair," Jessica announced. "Cody and LeShawna."

"Damn, boy," LeShawna said, shaking her head and wiping the mixture of soda and ice cold water off her face. "Before ya get started on courtin', how's about ya cut back on the Altoids. Them bein' 'curiously strong' ain't for show, you know."

"That probably wouldn't be a bad idea," Cody said somewhat nervously. The reaction LeShawna made was a lot better than he had anticipated, but still wasn't comforted. "I don't like the taste any way."

The buzzer sounded again.

"Here comes our sixth place pair," Jessica announced. Seconds later, two figures dropped from the ceiling and onto the others stacked rather nicely on the stage. "Beth and Justin."

"Oh, come on!" Justin complained as he looked in horror at what he was drenched in. "Do you realize that Mountain Dew will damage my scalp? The folks at Gluteus Maximus Modeling are not going to like this!"

"At least I don't have braces any more," Beth stated, although in a sheepish manner as she tried to keep herself from blushing any more than she already was. A sight which Cody saw, leaving him slightly crestfallen.

The buzzer sounded once again.

"And the pair that managed to come in fifth is..." Jessica proceeded to announce. Two figures dropped from the ceiling. On the way down, one of them was screaming in an incredibly high-pitch. "Geoff and Eva."

"Babe!" Geoff cried, running frantically toward Bridgette.

"Schmoopy... boo?" Bridgette said. She went from being excited to being confused. In large part because Geoff had suddenly positioned himself behind her, shaking in great terror. She looked over and shot her eyes in horror.

"I'M GONNA KILL HIM!" Eva roared. She began stomping toward the couple when some one stepped in her way.

"Girl, it ain't worth it," LeShawna declared. "Besides, it's not like he was doing it willingly."

"I'm not talking about the kiss!" Eva growled.

"Whatcha hollerin' about then?" LeShawna asked.

"He grabbed my boobs on the way down!" Eva stated. She turned her attention back to the party dude and was breathing in and out through her teeth. "Prepare to die, obviously!"

"I was trying to grab a ledge, I swear!" Geoff cried from behind his perplexed surfer girlfriend.

Before any thing more could be said about the issue, the buzzer sounded.

"Looks like we have our fourth place pair," Jessica announced. All looked up as two more figures dropped from the ceiling and crashed on top of the other contestants. The distraction allowed Geoff the opportunity for some breathing room and immediately planted a huge kiss on Bridgette. Eva was more occupied with curiosity at the latest pair to arrive. "Trent and Courtney."

"This challenge was so unfair!" Courtney shrieked. "Forcing us to kiss someone who we clearly are not dating and using unholy things like gas and Marvin Gaye songs to do so! Who would dare come up something so vile?"

"You mean aside from Chris?" Trent noted. Courtney just stared at him for a moment and then groaned. The music man merely shrugged and sighed. "Boy, it's almost like these past couple of challenges have been catered to Izzy's recent mood."

"Or inspired by them," Beth pointed out.

Then the buzzer sounded again.

"Here comes our third place pair," Jessica announced. Everyone watched with great anticipation as two new figures dropped from the ceiling and landed onto the others on the stage. And the audience let out a large, collective gasp. "Duncan and Gwen."

"I KNEW IT!" Courtney cried. She immediately stomped over to her punk boyfriend and proceeded to pound on his chest repeatedly. "I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!"

"Ow, geez, calm down!" Duncan demanded, immediately grabbing her wrists and maintaining a tight grip to keep her from continuing to hit him. "Come on, you know as well as I do that we kissed unwillingly. Hell, you obviously did it yourself."

"But you did it with her!" Courtney yelled, clearly on the verge of sobbing. "Why did it have to be her?"

"Sheesh, Princess," Duncan groaned. "We've only ever talked about this like once two weeks ago. I used her name when I told my folks because they're not ready for you. I assure you, I have no romantic interest whatsoever for Gwen."

Courtney glared at him for a moment before descending into tears and burying her face on his chest. Duncan let out a heavy sigh and wrapped his arms around her. Like most of the others on the stage, Trent had been watching the whole exchange. He then scratched his head, turning his attention to his goth girlfriend. Gwen was sitting down looking rather depressed. He approached her and bent down to be in equal eye level with her.

"Plan on making a similar outburst?" Gwen questioned in a quiet grumble.

The music man shrugged. "The depends on how you're feeling, babe," he replied.

"For a second there, I figured you would at least act like you were trying to hide the fact that you were upset I kissed Duncan," Gwen noted with a raised brow.

"Then that would make me a hypocrite since I kissed Courtney," Trent pointed out.

"You know what really makes the whole thing so pathetic, though?" Gwen asked. "The kiss itself. It wasn't as pleasing as one probably would have figured to come from him and me."

"And may I ask why?" Trent questioned with a curious brow raised.

"It was like kissing my brother," Gwen answered. She then made a gag motion. "I don't need to be experiencing that again any time soon, so you can go ahead and purge all thoughts of me ever crushing on him."

Trent chuckled. "Glad to know," he said. "For what it's worth, the fact that you guys held out for as long as you did from kissing was proof enough of me about how you really felt about him."

"Nice to know just how understanding you are, handsome," Gwen said with a smile.

"I try, beautiful," Trent said with a smile of his own.

"And so we are down to two pairs," Jessica announced, breaking up whatever emotional scenes were on display on the stage. "We have Harold and Heather in one room, Noah and Izzy in the other. Which pair will maintain their composure long enough?"

"You're kidding me," Duncan groaned. "Izzy is still in it?"

"What do you care?" Courtney murmured while stopping herself from crying any further.

"_Someone lost a bet,_" Gwen said in a singing voice.

"What bet?" Courtney asked.

"I bet that she couldn't do better than me in the challenge," Duncan grumbled in reply. "But she has. And now she gets to slap me whenever she wants for a week."

"What kind of bet is that?" Courtney questioned in an upset tone.

"If I had done better than her, she would have kept her yap shut for an entire week," Duncan explained. "I was sure I had this one in the bag, even if we didn't know what the challenge was going in."

"Nice going, Duncan," Gwen teased.

"Yeah, yeah," Duncan continued to grumble. "Go ahead and laugh it up." Looking to distract himself, he scanned the stage amongst those who had been eliminated. "Where's blondie and the jock?"

"They back here lookin' for water ta clean themselves off wit'," Chef replied, pointing his thumb off the stage. He then looked over in that direction. "Looks like they found it. ... And they're usin' it."

There was a long stretch of silence in The Marshmallow. Then, a vast majority of everyone in the amphitheater, in particular the males, leaned toward that direction in the hopes of getting a closer look of how exactly Lindsay and Tyler were using the water to clean themselves. Their imagination was not quite far off from what the two were indeed doing.

Then the buzzer sounded.

"Ladies and gentlemen, our second place pair is about to be revealed," Jessica announced. Everyone watched with great anticipation to see who ended up not winning the challenge. Two figures dropped down from the ceiling and crashed onto the others on the stage. "Noah and Izzy."

"Hey, what happened?" Izzy asked curiously. "Where am I?"

"What happened is we lost," Noah muttered sternly to the redhead. "I was trying my damnedest to not breath in the fume, but oh no. You had to ripped my hands from over my mouth and kiss me."

"Really?" Izzy asked, blinking.

"Let me ask you something, Izzy," Noah began to say. "Are you so perverted that you have to tongue everyone you kiss?"

"I kissed Noah?" Izzy questioned. She then began counting on her fingers than raised her arms in victory. "Woo-hoo! That's eight down! Three more to go!"

Noah slapped a hand over his forehead. "Are you kidding me?" he groaned.

"Oh, that reminds me!" Izzy proclaimed. Seconds later, she slapped Duncan in the face. "That was fun! I'm gonna do it again!" She proceeded to slap Duncan again in the face.

"Ah!" Duncan growled. "This week is going to suck."

"And so, Harold and Heather are our winners," Jessica announced. "Let's bring the pair on down here." Sure enough, the winners received the same treatment as the losers. Within seconds, they had fallen to the stage all wet in Mountain Dew and ice cold water. Only Harold wasn't exactly getting up.

"What in the hell did you do to my man?" LeShawna demanded, quickly getting into Heather's face.

"It was his own fault," Heather answered in the same heated tone. "He had held his breath for a long time and then, for whatever reason, blew on his thumb and passed out."

"Well, that's one way to get out of kissing Heather," Duncan noted aloud.

"Bite me, punk," Heather seethed.

"Come on, baby," LeShawna to her unconscious boyfriend, trying to shake him awake. "Wake up for me, sugar."

"Here, let me help you out," Jessica said. She then turned to Chef and called out to him. "Chef!"

Seconds later, a large body of water splashed down upon the contestants on the stage. Virtually all of them screamed. Among them was a now conscious Harold, after which he gasped in great horror. Even Ezekiel had regained consciousness, himself sitting up as he gasped in oxygen with eyes shot wide open.

"Let's wrap this up so you kids can fight one another over who gets to the shower stalls first," Jessica stated. "As our winners, Harold and Heather are the recipients of a special prize. Both will get to have dinner for two at one of the more luxurious fine dining restaurants in Kitchener. And yes, the producers are flipping the bill."

"Hold up," LeShawna said, clearly upset at what she heard. "You mean to tell me that they now hafta go ta dinner together?"

"No," Jessica replied simply. "I said they both get dinner for two. Which means Harold gets to take someone to the dinner while Heather gets to take someone to the dinner as well. The producers considered making it a double date to save on cash, but all the four person tables were booked. So the couples will be in opposite sides of the place."

"Now that's more like it," LeShawna said happily.

"Well, you can tell the producers they'll save even more money," Heather proclaimed. "I don't have a date, so I'm not going."

"Can't cancel the reservations," Jessica stated, shaking her head. "Too late for that. We gotta send a couple to occupy that table the producers paid for."

"Then give it to another couple," Heather said.

"You do realize that we had split up the couples for the purposes of this challenge, right?" Jessica noted. "Like the second place pair. Both are dating folks, so it would be unfair to have to pick one over the other."

"Are you, like, upset that I had to, like, kiss a guy, Noah?" Katie asked the egghead through sobs.

"Oh, don't be silly," Noah responded. His dry tone masking the sincereness of his answer. "I'm not gonna break up with you just because you were under the influence of a gas that made you kiss whomever it was you were stuck with."

"You mean we're still dating?" Katie asked in an excited gasp.

"Course we are, Katie-kat," Noah replied. "What kind of a boyfriend would I be to dump over something stupid like-" He didn't get to finish his sentence as he was immediately pounced on, causing him to fall back to the ground. His mouth was also being covered by a rather strong and passionate kiss.

"Ooo, that looks like fun!" Izzy called, perched on the shoulders of her oaf of a boyfriend. She proceeded to duplicate what Katie did, only in her manner as she hoped up and immediately slammed down on Owen as they crashed to the floor before they engaged in a sloppy make-out sessions.

"Are you saying that I'm forced to take my prize?" Heather asked sternly.

"Yep," Jessica replied. "Since you don't have a boyfriend, we'll provide you with a date using the one method the producers love to use. The Random Loser Generator." The audience cheered as Chef pushed out the giant wheel onto the stage. "If our memories are correct, there are four available bachelors in the group. Let's spin to see who you will be spending time with."

Chef spun the wheel with a simple nudge. The rotation went round and round at top speed with the audience cheering on. It then started to slow before it finally came to a stop. Almost everyone in The Marshmallow gasped to see whose picture the arrow on the wheel was pointing at. None was more shocked than Heather.

"The sexist prairie boy?" Heather cried.

All turned their attention to Ezekiel. The prairie boy stood perfectly still. Eyes shot wide open. Absolutely frozen from head to toe. Pale white from head to tone. As though he had turned into a statue in the blink of an eye.

"I am not going on a date with him!" Heather declared vehemently.

"It's the luck of the spin," Jessica noted.

"You can't make me go on a date with him!" Heather stated. "I refuse to go."

"Well, if that's how you feel," Jessica said. She walked over to the other with a wicked grin on your face. "But then what's to stop me from doing this." She bent slight over and whispered something into Heather's ear. Something that only Heather could ear. Whatever it was that she said, it caused the Queen Bee to flinch in horror. Her eyes shooting wide open. When Jessica was done, Heather looked at her with a mixture of terror and hate.

"You wouldn't dare!" Heather seethed quietly through her teeth.

"I would," Jessica replied in a quiet voice of her own. "_Artemis_."

Heather shook with rage, clenching her teeth together nearly to the point of cracking them. She finally stomped her feet, moaned, and crossed her arms over her chest in defeat.

"Fine!" Heather declared. She then turned her attention to the prairie boy. She marched over toward him, avoiding those who stood in her way to protect Ezekiel. In particular Bridgette, Geoff, and Izzy. "He better not even think about laying one finger on me, or so help me God he's going to wish he was never born."

"You don't deserve to be Zeke's boyfriend!" Izzy proclaimed. Heather merely screamed in frustration upon hearing this.

"I think we'll just leave it at that, folks," Jessica announced. "Tomorrow, Chris will be back and will therefore return as host of Challenge Night next week. Which I'm sure will be a doozy given next week is the end of period exams. So get on outta here and hit the books before it's too late."

"You managed to not kiss the bitch almighty and win us a dinner date, baby," LeShawna cried happily as she wrapped her arms around Harold. "You sure know how to please a woman."

"This is the happiest moment of my life!" Harold declared as he himself wrapped his arms around his girlfriend. "I can hardly contain myself! I'm in lesbians with you, LeShawna!"

LeShawna immediately looked at the geek with a confused brow raised. "Say what now?" she hollered.

* * *

**Room 1** - Geoff and Eva (Fifth Place)

**Room 2** - DJ and Sadie (Tenth Place)

**Room 3** - Tyler and Katie (Eighth Place)

**Room 4** - Owen and Lindsay (Last Place)

**Room 5** - Cody and LeShawna (Seventh Place)

**Room 6** - Harold and Heather (First Place)

**Room 7** - Justin and Beth (Sixth Place)

**Room 8** - Ezekiel and Bridgette (Ninth Place)

**Room 9** - Trent and Courtney (Fourth Place)

**Room 10** - Noah and Izzy (Second Place)

**Room 11** - Duncan and Gwen (Third Place)

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

The pairings were arranged based on looking through and determining which "crack" couples had the most romantic stories. It's quite obvious which couple had the most, so they were placed in Room 11. Next most in Room 10 and so on and so forth. The arrangement was actually done a long while ago, so I'm not sure if the order is correct at this time.

This chapter ended up becoming one big love letter. To **Scott Pilgrim**. Littered about are lines and references from the most wonderful series you will ever encounter. All should definitely check out this epic of epic epicness. All six volumes of the graphic novel series by Bryan Lee O'Malley are out. The video game just became available for download on the Playstation Network. The movie **Scott Pilgrim vs. The World**, directed by Edgar Wright of **Shaun of the Dead** and **Hot Fuzz** fame, comes out on Friday. Don't just settle for one, see it all. It is so good, you will be in lesbians with it. Just like me.

In the meantime, **keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with. Remember, Confession Cam I'm open for suggestions. The living space I'm working up on my own.

**Next Up:** The Clash at Demonhead (Not really, but I felt like throwing in another **Scott Pilgrim** reference.)


	27. Week 9, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Seven

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Last time on Total Drama Academy...

With yours truly on suspension for a week, our Resident Assistant Jessica was running the show. As expected, the kiddies ran amuck and did whatever they so pleased. This included Heather continuing her role as personal assassin for the Dodekatheon, Izzy trying to get Ezekiel a girlfriend even though she had reached the point where her very presence scares the living daylights out of the prairie boy, and Gwen still finding ways to attempt to bankrupt the show.

Jessica did, however, pull through with a rather ingenious challenge known as Heartbreak Hotel. Pitting our contestants in fan-made couples, releasing a special gas that would make the freaks fall for one another, and playing the melodies of Marvin Gaye, we got some scandalous fun. Lindsay and Owen weeping at being the losers, Geoff deathly afraid of Eva, Ezekiel even more flustered, Izzy revealing one of her perverted goals, and two of our golden couples reaffirming their relationship despite the intense peer pressure to do otherwise. Sorry fans of the Duncan and Gwen pairing. Ain't gonna happen here.

In the end, Harold and Heather managed to resist kissing one another for the victory. Part of that had to do with Harold managing to cause himself to pass out through rather idiotic means. Still, it scored him and LeShawna a dinner date. Heather, on the other hand, is furious that she is forced to go on a dinner date... with Ezekiel. That's a disaster waiting to happen. I can't wait!

Will Ezekiel survive going on a date with Heather?

Can Harold and LeShawna make the most of their long awaited opportunity at romance?

Why in the world is Izzy so determined to kiss all the boys on the show?

Find out in another thrilling episode of... Total... Drama... Academy!

_(Cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Week 9, Day 1 - Saturday)**

Duncan slowly exited his room. To say that he was in a foul, grumpy mood would be an understatement. He took a moment to yawn and scratch his back slightly. Then he shot a death glare over at the door that belonged to Owen. He stared at it for a moment that would have felt as though it lasted a very long time. After letting out a grunt he turned his head back straight forward and was about to put one step in front of the other.

Quite suddenly, a flash occurred that left Duncan dumbfounded. If one were to managed to view what had happened in slow motion, it would go like this. The door to Owen's room opened, letting out a large puff of smoke. Izzy jumped out of the room. Her hair was extremely frizzy, torn marks were about her clothes, there were black, charred marks on her skin, and smoke was coming off her body. She gave Duncan a quick, yet hard slap to the face. Then she jumped back into the room and closed the door. All of this happened in less than a second.

Duncan blinked a couple times, letting what had just happened register in his head. Then he shuddered and let out a heavy sigh. He was about to resume his attempt at walking away when another door opened. This one belonging to some one in particular he would stop dead in his tracks for. His girlfriend Courtney.

"You're up awfully early this morning," Courtney noted. She had only her head sticking out of the door to take a good look at her punk boyfriend standing in the middle of the hallway.

"Like I can sleep with all the noise that's happening in the other room," Duncan muttered. "I get the feeling it was done so that she could rub it into my face." He was about to sigh when a flash of orange and green appeared and disappeared with a slapping sound accompanying it. Duncan, with a fresh hand print on his cheek, waited a moment before finally sighing. "This week is definitely going to suck. I'm gonna hang in the living space for a while."

"You can't, remember?" Courtney noted. "They're installing everything for the room today."

Duncan looked her for a moment, blinking in confusion. "The list got finalized?" he asked. "Didn't Gwen wanna add some more money spending stuff to it before handing it over?"

"She did, last night," Courtney pointed out. "You just weren't paying attention because you were on constant guard for whenever you were going to get slapped by Izzy."

"All the good that did," Duncan scoffed. "Got slapped ten times before I finally managed to go sleep." He let out another heavy sigh. "Well, then I guess I'll be in The Marshmallow. Twiddling my thumbs."

"Perhaps I can suggest a better alternative," Courtney said in a rather seductive tone. She opened the door further for a big reveal that caught Duncan's attention ten-fold. That's because he couldn't remember the last time he saw her wearing white cotton lingerie and a see-through silk robe.

"Aren't you worried about the cameras?" he asked in a squeaking voice.

"Didn't you hear?" she purred. "The cameras in our rooms are turned off while construction is going on in the living space."

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a Cover-Less Book)**

Chris - /Chuckles_ with a wicked smirk._/ "Gee. I wonder what will happen next."

* * *

"Does this mean you'll finally let me into your panties?" Duncan questioned further.

Courtney's immediate response was to grab his collar and pull him toward her. "Shut up before I change my mind," she stated. Seconds later, she pulled him into the room and slammed the door shut.

A few moments passed when the door suddenly opened again. Bridgette was pushed out of the room with the door slamming right behind her. The surfer girl scratched the back of her hand and glanced at the door with a raised brow.

"You could have just asked me to leave," she said aloud with a pout. She stared at the door for another minute before turning and walking gingerly over to a particular door across the hallway. She knocked a couple times before it opened.

"He's all yours," Noah said as he stepped out of the room.

"Thank you," Bridgette said with a smile. She then stepped into the room and closed the door.

Noah sighed and was about venture down the hallway when he heard a door creek open. Followed by a female voice. Calling his name. In a sweet attempt to sound seductive. Which only slightly worked in that respect, but nevertheless did what it was intended to do. Grab Noah's attention.

"No-ah," Katie called.

Noah looked over to see Katie pop out of her room. Her pajama shirt unbuttoned just enough so that she was exposing her right shoulder. She batted her eyes at him. All of her attempts to act sensual only made her look cute. But then Noah didn't seem to mind the cuteness. He looked over to where he believed a camera was, drew a grin on his face, and rapidly raised his eyebrows up and down. He walked over, but was barely within a few feet when Katie suddenly grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him in. Leaving a barley audible yelp in his wake before the door was closed shut.

A few moments later, another door opened and Tyler peered quietly out of his room. He looked around, seeing if there was any one about. Satisfied that he would be alone in the hallway, he began tip-toeing from end to another. Tripping and falling on his face along the way. Upon arriving at his destination, he knocked on the door and waited patiently before it opened.

"Tiger!" Lindsay cheered, bouncing up and down excitedly. Briefly distracting Tyler for a moment. His eyes following every bounce she was making right in front of him. Then she jumped onto him for a big embrace. The jock could feel that it was a big one indeed. They tumbled back into Lindsay's room.

Sadie exited the room and closed the door behind her. Giggling quietly along the way. She then skipped over to the room of her wanna-be twin. She was about to knock on the door when a sudden voice sounded that caused her to stop.

"Don't even think about it, Sadie," Noah said, his muffled voice coming from the other side of the door.

"Can I at least, like, sit outside the door and listen?" Sadie asked sweetly.

"Could she, Noah-bear?" Katie asked, her voice muffled by the door as well.

"Fine," Noah sighed, knowing that to argue the subject would be completely useless. "Just as long as she doesn't make a sound." Katie and Sadie both started to squeal until Noah interrupted them. "Was I not clear about the noise?"

"Oops," Sadie whispered. "Sorry, Noah."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "One thing I forgot to mention about that special love gas I used in the challenge. Even if the person who breathed in the fumes is washed down with water and Mountain Dew to disspell the effects, some of the more natural emotions remain heightened for another day or two. Which the minions are finding out first-hand."

Chef - /_Stares at the camera for a moment. Then he pulls out an iPod, seemingly attached to the sound speakers in the building, and plays "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye. He slowly forms a grin._/

Chris - "At least there's one good thing about the cameras being turned off in the rooms while construction in the living space is going on. We don't have to see the... activities going on in Owen's room." /_Shudders._/

* * *

Right outside of Riker Hall, and surrounded by numerous stagehands who look suspiciously like Mr. Black, was a large tent. Obviously set up for while there is construction going on in the living space. Despite where the tent was located, those within could hear the music being played from within Riker Hall.

"I'm taking it someone's taking advantage of the cameras being turned off in the rooms," Trent stated, pointing his thumb in the direction of where Riker Hall would be. It was obvious that this was said in response to his hearing Marvin Gaye being played.

"I think it's more than just some one taking advantage," Gwen noted in a teasing voice.

"We think maybe we should be in your room instead of out here, beautiful?" Trent asked, playing along.

"Tempting offer, handsome," Gwen said in a seemingly seductive tone. "But we wouldn't want to leave Harold, LeShawna, and Zeke at the mercy of those two."

Gwen cocked her head in the direction behind her. The two looked over to find Cody and Beth, sitting inches away from one another and sheepishly looking away from one another. Both were blushing light colors of pink on their cheeks and occasionally stole quick glances at one another.

"You think it's about time those two hooked up?" Trent asked Gwen quietly.

"I think so," Gwen replied just as quietly. "The question we really should be asking is whether to push them along or wait to see if they'll get over that cursed natural shyness."

"Hey, guys!" Harold called out from behind a curtain, grabbing the sudden attention of the other four in the tent. "I think we're going to need a little help here."

"What kind of help?" Cody asked, somewhat nervously as he was still in a bit of a sheepish state.

"Am I d'ooin' this right?" Ezekiel replied, also from behind the curtain.

The prairie boy and the nerd emerged from behind the curtain. To say that they were far from looking like clean-cut gentlemen would be an understatement. Not with Ezekiel's shoe laces untied, Harold's shirt untucked on one side, Ezekiel's pants worn backwards, Harold's tie extremely loose, and Ezekiel still wearing the toque. And that was before the others realized that for whatever reason the two had swapped various articles of clothing.

"This might take a while," Trent noted.

"We should be fortunate we're out here so early in the morning," Gwen added.

"Perhaps we could help you out in dressing you up," Beth suggested.

"Then I'm gonna need both y'all girls to help me out wit' this damned dress," LeShawna cried from the other side of the tent, also from behind a curtain. "How is it that it matches my side yet I still have a hard time zippin' it up?"

"Oh yeah," Gwen sighed, getting up from her chair and walking over to the curtain LeShawna was behind. "This is definitely gonna take a while. Come on, Beth. LeShawna's gonna need all the help she can get."

"Maybe we should see if we can't get some of the other girls to help out," Beth further suggested, hopping off of her chair and following the goth girl. "You know, to make sure we're doing this right."

"Believe me," Gwen began to state. "The last thing we need is more girls trying to help. They would be fighting each other over which shade of blue to paint over LeShawna's eye lids."

"Not ta mention that that itself would last ten hours," LeShawna added from behind the curtain. "There ain't no way I'm lettin' that go down. You two will do just fine. Now get over here and help me out!"

Gwen smiled, shrugged, and entered behind the curtain. Beth scratched her head, but followed along any way. The boys watched all of this occur with varying emotions. Trent was the only one who didn't seem any more bewildered or confused like the other three as he simply shook his head with a smile and got up from his seat.

"Come on, Codester," the music man said. "Let's get these boys straightened up and properly dressed for tonight."

"I feel itchy, eh," Ezekiel noted, using both hands to gently scratch his behind.

"I was thinking maybe I should comb my hair to the side," Harold stated. "You know, kind of like in that movie Grease."

"Say guys," Cody asked. "I know I probably shouldn't ask this... in case it's like a jinx or something... but how come Heather's not in the tent with us getting prepared for tonight."

"She probably thinks being in here with us is beneath her," Harold replied with a shrug. "She doesn't like being apart of this any more than I'm sure Zeke does."

"J'oost thinkin' ab'oot havin' t'oo be with her t'oonight scares me," Ezekiel said in a shiver.

"Does make you wonder about one thing, though," Trent noted. "What did Jessica say to her that made her reluctantly go along with having this date in the first place? You think maybe Jessica is also making sure she's on her best behavior tonight by having whatever she told her hanging over her head?"

"Gosh," Harold uttered aloud. "I never really thought of that."

"I can't imagine too many things spooking Heather the way Jessica did," Cody added.

"I'm still scared, eh," Ezekiel noted, continuing to shiver.

* * *

Heather, or rather Artemis, downed the contents in her goblet once and then did it again moments later after a servant had poured her a refill of her grape juice. She sat in her seat amongst the Dodekatheon, fuming in contained rage. This did not go unnoticed by most of the others seated with her. Only they did not look surprised in the least bit. They merely waited in patience before finally speaking to her about the situation she faced.

"I did warn you about your Resident Assistant, Artemis," Chelsea, or rather Athena, noted. "She is a troublemaker most foul."

"And they call me vile," Heather muttered, seething through her teeth. "How in the world could Chris have been so lucky to land such a beast like her to by our Resident Assistant?"

"She fit the criteria they were looking for," Jeremy, otherwise known as Zeus, replied. "A lot of that has to do with the fact that she used to be one of us."

"I suspected that much," Heather said. "I was careful enough to make sure that not even the goddamned cameras from the show caught me doing what she knew. And the details were right on the button."

"Then you can guess for yourself what rank she used to be," Madison, or Hera, stated.

Heather scoffed and crossed her arms. "I would have been surprised if she had been anything but Artemis," she said. "How else would she have known about Aphrodite's love gas. So how come she's no longer part of the Dodekatheon?"

"There were certain situations she would not comply with," Jeremy answered. "As a result, she was exiled and was branded with the rank of Leto as a result. There were many who have been exiled before her, but none managed to somehow withstand the dishonor and shame that comes with it."

"Most of those exiled end up transferring out of Richmore Academy," Madison explained. "They were usually broken down emotionally, mentally, and spiritually by then. But Leto has become a special case. One who has regrouped and could one day become the threat she clearly posses to the Dodekatheon."

"Why not just get rid of her?" Heather asked.

"She lived up to her previous rank of Artemis too well," Chelsea explained. "If she wanted to, she could blackmail each and every one of us into doing her bidding if she so pleased. We managed to run a truce with her in that neither side would interfere with the other unless there was justifiable cause."

"And what of my case?" Heather questioned further.

"We do not like it, but it is unfortunately a justifiable cause," Madison replied. "Your situation was part of the show. It is not part of the runnings of the school. We can only do so much to help you avoid any further trouble, but any thing that occurs in relation to the show is technically not involved with the politics and academics Richmore Academy. You are on your own in that respect."

"Great," Heather grumbled.

"But don't think we are doing nothing to remedy the situation," Jeremy pointed out. "Strings are being pulled to prevent her from substituting for Chris McLean should he be incapacitated for however long from his hosting duties. Regardless, however, you still have to go on that date tonight with the prairie mortal."

"You know what the most infuriating part about Lato forcing me to do that date tonight?" Heather stated. "She picked out the dress for me to wear. I had no say in it at all whatsoever."

"Told you she was dangerous," Chelsea muttered before sipping from her goblet.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Jessica - "The actual exile itself wasn't too bad. It was what led to it that was... well, humiliating would probably be the appropriate word. I owe Jackson a lot for helping me through the ordeal. But that's all I'm going to say about the situation."

Noah - "Out of respect for our Resident Assistant, I'm not gonna mention what happened when she was kicked out of the Dodekatheon. All I will say is Heather better hope she knows what she's getting herself into."

Chef - "First, them kids ain't eatin' my cookin' when I run the buffet line at tha schoo'. Now they ain't eatin' my cookin' when I offer ta cook those who ain't goin' on a date dinner. They actually want crazy girl to cook them Shepard's pie."

Izzy - /_Wearing a chef's hat and smiling._/ "Hey, kids! Now you can cook along at home and impress your vegan relatives!" /_Reaches off camera and pulls in a bewildered Bridgette. A black box appears on the bottom that reads, "Not really a relative, but the closest vegan available." Bridgette notices black box and blinks in confusion._/  
Bridgette - "Um, Izzy... How did you-" /_Is suddenly pushed off camera by Izzy._/  
Izzy - "If you're under twenty-three, ask a grown up to help you out." /_Bends down and pulls up a table containing our potatoes, soymilk, soy margarine, bottle labeled red wine, the finest olive oil, one onion, one celery stick with leaves, two medium carrots, two cloves garlic, fake meat stuff, vegan gravy mix, and knives._/ "One! The cut the potatoes up into smallish pieces. Leave the skins on if they look okay. Two! Cut up the onion, carrot, celery and garlic as small as possible. Use a food processor, or invite your friends and make them do all the work." /_Reaches off the other side of camera and pulls in a grumpy Duncan. Duncan keeps arms crossed and says nothing. Izzy slaps back of his head._/ "Cut up the veggies!"  
Duncan - "Alright, alright! Sheesh!"

* * *

As dusk was beginning to set, those in the tent were making last minute preparations for the evening's festivities. Harold, LeShawna, and Ezekiel were as nervous as could be. Particularly Ezekiel, who was literally shivering from head to toe with his eyes shot wide open in fear of what he was sure to happen to him.

"I'm g'oona die, eh," the prairie boy murmured.

"You're not gonna die, Zeke," Trent said in assurance. "And I'm sure Jessica is making sure Heather doesn't maim you, either. What you should be most worried about is your nerves, okay? Just take everything one step at a time, don't think ahead to what you're expected to do later, and you'll be fine."

"Gosh, I'm actually scared what might happen tonight," Harold admitted aloud. "It's like, I've been waiting for this moment to happen for long and now I'm drawing a blank on what I'm supposed to do."

"Don't worry man," Cody said in his attempt to be reassuring. "I'm sure you'll remember stuff as the night goes along."

"Girl, I'm really wishin' we were doin' tha double-date right about now," LeShawna said as she exhaled. "This is more nerve-wrecking than watchin' a Shyamalan film. You don't know how bad it's gonna get."

"Calm down, LeShawna," Gwen said. "Just relax and take deep breaths. The problem with first dates for a lotta couples is that they set expectations that are too high. Keep things nice and simple and everything will be fine."

"Believe that everything you do is attractive to him," Beth suggested. "That way, you don't have to think you have to do something impressive because you've done that already."

"Alright, losers," a voice called from the tent entrance. Everyone turned to see that it was a very displeased looking Heather standing before them with her arms crossed. "Let's get this crap over with."

"Manners, Heather," Gwen said, mocking the tone of authority that caused Heather to shake with rage. "It is a very unladylike attitude with which you're displaying."

"The sooner we get through this, the better for everyone," Heather scoffed. "Got it?"

"Sure, whatever you say," Gwen said. "But first, we need pictures." She smiled as she raised up her camera and waved it slightly, as though she was rubbing it into Heather's face. "We want to cherish this moment of you wearing a nice little pink bow to hold up that excuse for a ponytail and the lovely pink dress you have on."

"You are so dead, weird goth girl," Heather muttered. She waited while everyone slowly began to exit the tent. When Ezekiel was about to walk by, she immediately turned to him. "Don't you dare touch me, you understand?"

Being threatened caused Ezekiel to squeak in horror and hop slightly away from Heather. He continued to shiver from head to toe as he quickly nodded his head, trying to make it clear that he understood her perfectly.

"Now listen here," LeShawna stated, confronting Heather. "My Ginger Biscuit and I are nervous enough as it is goin' on a date. We hafta be in the same restaurant as you. And yer pickin' on poor lil' Zeke is buggin' tha hell outta me. Check yo 'tude at tha door right now or I'm gonna break my foot up yo ass. Ya dig?"

"Like I have a favorable choice to do otherwise," Heather scoffed.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Beth - "We're so concerned about Zeke. Who knows what Heather will do to him, and she doesn't have to do it physically."

Cody - /_Taps fingers together nervously._/ "You know... helping out others with Beth... it was... really nice..."

Gwen - "Trent and I still plan to do that double date with Harold and LeShawna. We're thinking at some point during break we can figure out when and where we're gonna go."

Trent - "It seems like all of a sudden Gwen and I are turning into match makers. We're trying to set Harold and LeShawna rolling with their relationship and now we're thinking about pushing Beth and Cody along on a similar path. Although we're not being so aggressive about it as Izzy trying to get Zeke a boyfriend."

Izzy - /_Still wearing a chef hat and still has the ingredients on a table, now with pans and burners._/ "Three! Boil the potatoes fifteen-to-twenty minutes until tender, then mash. Four! Heat the olive oil in a pan, add the vegetables and cook for fifteen-to-twenty minutes until they're very soft. Especially the carrots, which are probably the hardest. You can add some red wine. It's an option. It makes everything awesome. Your other option would be to drink the red wine, which works too." /_Starts drinking from the bottle labeled red wine. An arrow appears pointing at the bottle and reads, "Strawberry Soda."_/

Chris - "In case any one wants to know." /_Brings up a piece of paper and clears his throat._/ "Couples who took advantage of no cameras being on in their rooms by going all the way: Izzy and Owen, Courtney and Duncan, Tyler and Lindsay. Those who got to second base: Bridgette and Geoff, Katie and Noah."

Izzy - /_Still making Shepard's pie._/ "Five! Add the fake meat stuff. Six! Add the gravy stuff! Eight! Add some soymilk and stir so everything's a bit saucy!" /_Begins stirring wildly, causing contents to splatter on the walls._/

* * *

**(Week 9, Day 2 - Sunday)**

As the students woke up in the morning, they found themselves wandering down into The Marshmallow. Perhaps it was merely out of boredom. Or it was probably to join in with Gwen. This was because construction on the living space was almost finished. By this point, everyone has heard some of what was going to get put in there and they could not wait to see the results. At the moment, in The Marshmallow were Gwen, Trent, Bridgette, Geoff, Cody, Beth, DJ, Noah, Katie and Sadie. Bridgette and Geoff were, of course, engaged in their favorite pass time.

"I have a sneaky suspicion they're going to attempt being able to do that while surfing," Noah noted aloud.

"Ohmygosh, I bet, like, they would so be able to," Sadie said in an excited tone.

"I know, right?" Katie agreed. "I mean, like, Bridgette is such a good surfer and, like, Geoff would so be able to keep his balance and stuff. They would look so cute."

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not doubting they'd be able to accomplish it," Noah stated. "It's just a matter of how many times they have to practice before they'll be able to pull it off on a regular basis. Not to mention how often they would get lost in their game of tonsil hockey to remember to get back on the board to try again."

"Man, I can't wait to see how the livin' space looks," DJ said, voicing his excitement while gently petting Bunny. "I heard you guys put in a lotta ideas that are amazin'."

"The theme being that no expense would be spared," Gwen said rather gleefully. "We were gonna put quality in that space no matter the cost. Because we're not paying for it."

"I heard even after you guys got some ideas together you added to the list after the Friday Night Challenge," Beth said. "What kind of stuff did you include in the living space?"

"A few extra things here and there," Gwen replied with a grin. "I'd rather not spoil the surprise, so you guys are going to have to patiently wait until it's all set and ready to go."

Before the subject could be discussed any further, the doors open to reveal Harold and LeShawna entering. Virtually all of the present occupants of The Marshmallow, including Bridgette and Geoff who ended their face sucking marathon, began cheering or applauding or both. Or in the case of Katie and Sadie, squealing with enthusiastic joy. Harold and LeShawna merely took all of it and sat themselves near Gwen and Trent.

"So, how did our favorite couple do on their first date?" Trent asked.

"Ah, it went down alright," LeShawna said. "Nothin' too special."

"But we still had a good time," Harold stated, putting an arm around LeShawna's shoulders. "I felt good to finally get that first date off our chests. The food was actually pretty good and there was a space where couples could dance to the music."

"Honey, my Ginger Babycakes was very much the gentleman he sold himself ta be," LeShawna said happily to Gwen. "He was so fine, I can't wait for the next date."

"Now we really have to set that double date in motion," Gwen said with a slight giggle. "I'm looking forward to seeing how much fun you guys will have on a second date."

Quite suddenly, the doors opened again. All looked to see Heather entering The Marshmallow. And they were left in a rather confused state. She did not bother looking up, immediately taking the closest seat that was as far back from the others as possible. She sat down, crossed her arms, and stared off to the distance on her right.

Some time later, Ezekiel entered The Marshmallow. Most everyone else watched in anticipation to see what the prairie boy would do. He merely looked rather bewildered as he made he way down the isle and sat himself near the others. He did not bother to take one look around to see if Heather was around. He just sat down, looking as perplexed as the others felt.

"Zeke?" Bridgette asked. "Are you okay?"

Ezekiel blinked and scratched his toque-covered head. "I'm n'oot sh'oore, eh," he responded.

"Any thing happen last night when you were with Heather?" Cody questioned curiously.

Ezekiel shook his head. "N'oope," he answered. "I d'oon't think anythin' happened. It was... 'ood."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Arms crossed, trying to look away from the camera. Then she finally turns forward._/ "It was... different. Nothing really happened whatsoever. He didn't touch me. He didn't speak to me unless I spoke to him, which was barely at all. Otherwise... he conducted himself like a gentleman. Opening the door for me, pulling the chair out, all that stuff. It was... strange. Really strange. I can't really say anything more about it."

Ezekiel - /_Scratches toque-covered head._/ "She didn't ins'oolt me or anythin', eh. All she ever said w'oos quiet thanks an' w'oot f'ood she w'oonted. N'oothin' else. Is that w'oot datin' is like? I d'oon't get it, eh. Izzy made it 'oot t'oo be s'oo... active."

Izzy - /_Still cooking Shepard's pie._/ "Nine! Mash the potatoes with soymilk and soy margarine." /_Begins mashing repeatedly, causing contents to splatter about the walls again. Gets a taste off her finger and giggles._/ "Mmm, mashy. Ten! Get a nine-by-thirteen baking dish, or a casserole or something, and glop the fake meat/veggie mixture in." /_Pulls out baking dish and dumps everything that has been cooked into it._/ "Eleven! Make a layer of potatoes on top! In between, you can optionally add a layer of sliced tomatoes, cooked spinach or corn."

* * *

By this point, all twenty-two students had gathered in The Marshmallow. Waiting impatiently for the living space to be revealed. It was some time later that Jessica appeared at the door and called Gwen over. The goth girl got up and look out through the door, obviously to take a good look at the result of her handy work to see if it was to her liking. Gwen turned back to the others with a big grin painted upon her face.

"I think you guys are ready to really enjoy our stay at this place," the goth girl stated. She then stepped to one side, ready to swing the door open for the others. "May I present to you our very own... Casa Loma!" She pulled the door open and all within The Marshmallow got to see for themselves their newly designed living space.

Casa Loma was everything they could have imagined and more. There was a gigantic wave machine. A blown up picture of Duncan, Ezekiel, Geoff, Harold, and Trent dressed in pink nurses uniforms framed over an old-fashioned fireplace. Couches and chairs that were of pristine comfort along with a number of sturdy coffee tables. An 80-inch widescreen television set supplied with a high-grade 5.1 home theater audio system, a Playstation 3, several controllers, and a library of games and Blu Ray movies. A Jacuzzi that could fit fifteen connected to a custom built waterfall that went all the way up to the ceiling. A four-door refrigerator, freezer, heater, and grilling system stored with an abundance of groceries. Mounted on one of the walls was a collection of wigs and a chicken hat with a label stating that they were Heather's. Placed under the television was a coconut with grass stuffed in one spot and a red line to create a smile. There was lots more to the decorations, of course, but there was only so much all of the students could take in.

"It's so... beautiful!" Geoff whispered in awe.

"Screw my room," Duncan proclaimed. "I'm staying here even after I graduate."

"This isn't just any and every college student's dream living space," Courtney stated. "It's Heaven on Earth."

"Girl, this is gonna be the best two years of our lives," LeShawna declared.

"Where in the hell did you get those?" Heather shrieked, pointing at the wigs and the chicken hat.

"Like I'm gonna tell you," Gwen laughed. "Don't even bother trying to take them down. We've got them pinned to the wall real good. Perhaps some day we'll get a chance to add those extensions you're wearing as a pony tail."

"You are so going to pay for this, weird goth girl!" Heather fumed.

All of the students immediately sat themselves on the couches and chairs. They found themselves in a state of relaxation they never thought possible, nearly every since one of them sighing with relief as as they made themselves comfortable. Jessica was merely content with leaning up against the back of one of the couches.

"Dudes, this is so awesome!" Geoff cried.

"We gotta test out the TV and audio system," Duncan said, immediately grabbing the television remote from the coffee table near him and pressing the power button.

"Welcome back to _Celebrity__ Manhunt_!" a blonde female in a red dress announced as the television began projecting picture on the screen. "I'm Blaineley O'Halloran, and have I got a hot scoop for all you _Total Drama_ fans out there!"

"You know what?" Geoff said rather suddenly. "I hate this woman. I really do."

"What do you mean, Sweetie?" Bridgette asked.

"I dunno," Geoff answered with a shrug. "There's just these vibes about her that I really don't like."

"Do opposites really attract?" Blaineley asked in her announcing manner. "Some times they do, some times they don't. But other times, they're deliciously scandalous. Inside sources have provided us with video of a dinner date that occurred last night you would not believe could ever possibly happen."

Everyone, including Jessica, shot their eyes wide open in shock. They then watched as amateur video was shown on the screen. The camera was shaking, but managed to maintain clear focus of peering through the window of a particular restaurant. Seen through the window was Harold and LeShawna, looking to be enjoying themselves.

"Two familiar faces in Harold and LeShawna were seen dining together in downtown Kitchener," Blaineley announced. "_Celebrity Manhunt_ has learned that it was the prize from a challenge conducted during the filming of a new season of _Total Drama_, which is ongoing as we speak. But they weren't the only couple under similar conditions last night."

Heather blanched faster than the speed of light. Ezekiel turned pale white from head to toe. And nearly everyone else in Casa Loma gasped in horror. For they all knew what would surely be revealed. Then a cell phone began to ring. Not wanting to turn away from the screen, the students shifted their eyes to see Jessica pick up her cell phone and begin speaking with whomever was calling her. They then immediately turned their eyes back to the television and watched as the video panned over to another window and showed Ezekiel and Heather dining together.

"Is this what it looks to be?" Blaineley questioned, wearing a smug face the entire time. "Has the sexist prairie boy courted the biggest queen bee this side of Canada? We are still trying to gather as much information we can on the subject, but the fact remains that Ezekiel and Heather were on a dinner date last night. Could it be possible that there's romance in the air between these two? More importantly, how in the world did it ever happen in the first place?"

"This... can... not... be... happening..." Heather managed to utter quietly.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "We know exactly who filmed the kiddies on their dinner dates. Let's just say he sent his application in for the previously proposed second season just a little too late and wasn't happy that we rejected him because of it. He's been trying to find ways to sneak onto the show, which we've managed to keep quiet until now."

Jessica - "The phone call was for an emergency meeting with the producers. This applicant Chris mentioned isn't the only one we're all concerned about. Remember Sierra? Her stalking of Cody has really gotten on the nerves of the school officials and they want something to be done about it. They're probably not going to like what the producers have put together as a resolution."

Heather - /_Fuming._/ "This is beyond humiliating! This is infuriating! How dare this a-/**censored**/-hole film me on my forced dinner with homeschool and then get that bitch of a TV host to imply that I am dating him! My reputation is screwed because of all of this! Some one is going to pay!"

Izzy - /_Holds a completed dish of Shepard's pie._/ "You can serve it as is, or bake it in the oven for a few minutes to crisp it up on top. A salad on the side would be health-conscious, but we only have so much energy for this." /_Owen walks in. Izzy leaps onto his shoulders and dumps all of Shepard's pie down Owen's throat. Both giggle happily._/

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

So it seems that episodes of _Total Drama World Tour_ are airing faster in Australia and then leaked onto the Internet. The results are quite interesting. I'll try not to spoil too much from those who wish to continue watching as they get aired on Cartoon Network. As I feared, there is a great deal that I am not liking. I am not a fan of their doing drama for the sake of drama and there is one major situation that was done in which the execution just made the whole thing much more damaging in my eyes to the characters than they have done in _Total Drama Action_. Still, there were a lot of other material that at least tried to even things out. Certain characters were given more time for development and some great lines were said. The show is still nowhere near the level of _Total Drama Island_, but it's slightly better than _Total Drama Action_.

In the meantime, I had a "D'oh!" moment during the writing of this chapter and noticed that Peter Oldring, the voice of Cody, Ezekiel, and Tyler, was a regular cast member of _Blue Collar TV_. He was pretty darn good on that show, often times playing the straight guy to the quirky characters played by Jeff Foxworthy, Bill Engvall, and Larry The Cable Guy. Although he was able to play outrageous characters including one sketch in which he was a drill sergeant trying to disspell sexist remarks often said towards women in the military and actually failing. Reruns air a lot on Country Music Television, often in blocks, so check him out there.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** End of Period Week


	28. Week 9, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Eight

**(Week 9, Day 3 – Monday)**

**(The Others)**

"_Heather and Ezekiel, sitting in a tree,  
K-I-S-S-I-N-G!  
First comes love, then comes marriage,  
Then comes Heather with a baby carriage!"_

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Heather shrieked in frustration. This only made the girls giggle some more as they skipped past her in leaving the room to get to their next class. "You are all so gonna pay!"

"Yeah, I don't think they care," Duncan noted, leaning back in his chair and propping his feet upon his desk. "Any chance these girls get to mock you, of all people, they're gonna milk it for all its worth. And I highly doubt it'll expire any time soon."

"Bite me!" Heather roared, snapping back at the punk.

"Like that's gonna make things any better," Duncan retorted. He merely stared back without a care when Heather shot him a death glare.

"These people have no idea who they are messing with," Heather grumbled as she made her way to her seat. Unfortunately for her, someone was within earshot of her and picked up on what she said.

"Sure they do," LeShawna noted. "They be messin' with a Spoiled Lil' Daddy's Girl whose karma has come back to bite her in the boo-tay."

"They don't know anything about me!" Heather hollered back in anger.

"They know enough about you from watching the show to determine what kind of a person you are," Trent pointed out.

"Oh, that's a load of crap!" Heather stated. "Ezekiel came off the show looking like an ignorant, sexist prairie boy and yet he's here getting smothered by these hypocritical girls."

"I wouldn't exactly say he's being smothered by girls," Duncan said. "Not when Izzy's trying to shove him up against their faces in some psychotic attempt to hook him up with one."

"If all this is gettin' to Heather, I can't imagine how Zeke is handlin' it," DJ noted, deciding to inject himself into the conversation. He was not the only one.

"I hope they're not giving him too much grief," Bridgette said. "It was bad enough having to go on a date, now the whole world has seen it thanks to whoever made that tape and sent it to that _Celebrity Manhunt_ show."

"When I get my hands on that no good sonuvabitch responsible..." Heather seethed under her breath, dropping her head in brooding fashion.

"I'll tell you guys one thing," Geoff said, scratching the back of his head underneath his cowboy hat. "I hate that Blaineley woman. The chick who co-hosts that _Celebrity Manhunt_ show."

"I know, right," Katie said. "She, like, says some mean things about celebrities and stuff."

"Totally," Sadie added. "I remember when she, like, called Tyler the athletic equivalent of William Hung." Just about everyone cringed when they heard this. Just one person did not.

"That doesn't sound so bad," Lindsay said, obvious to just how insulting the statement was.

"Um, that's actually bad, babe," Tyler noted. "Remember that Asian kid on _American Idol_?"

"Uh huh," Lindsay said as she nodded. She looked to Tyler to explain more, but he merely looked back at her. After a moment's thought, she finally got a clue and gasped in horror. "That meanie!" She then grabbed Tyler and pulled him in for an embrace. Unaware that she actually pulled his head straight into her chest, leaving him with a huge smile on his face. "Tiger is, like, really good at sports and stuff. Like yo-yo's!"

The rest decided it was better not to try to engage in that direction of the conversation with her any further. Besides, Tyler looked like he was in heaven with his face literally buried in her bosom and therefore did not want to deny him his moment of bliss.

"So," Eva uttered, looking to get the conversation rolling properly. "Sounds like this Blaineley woman seems to hate us, is that it?"

"Not really," Katie answered. "She, like, totally has a thing for Justin."

"Her and just about every other single female in this country," Duncan muttered. He managed to glance over to see that the male model in question was still absorbed in his own world, staring at his reflection in a handheld mirror and not even reacting to his being mentioned. The sight of which making Duncan roll his eyes in disgust.

"She didn't seem to have a problem with Owen winning the show," Trent noted. "In fact, didn't she try to interview you or something recently?"

"Huh?" Owen uttered, finding himself being talked to. It took him a minute before he remembered what the question was. "Oh yeah! She wanted to talk to me about the show. But then Izzy wanted me to try out some really cool roller coaster all of a sudden. It was fun!"

"Izzy made you blow off an interview just to ride a roller coaster?" DJ asked with a confused brow raised.

Owen thought about it for a moment. After his brain finally register some form of logic thought, he shrugged. "I guess so," he replied with a giggle. "That Izzy sure knows how to have fun, huh."

"Sure, whatever you say," Duncan muttered. "Getting back to that Blaineley woman..."

"She, like, also mentioned that LeShawna had, like, the perfect butt and stuff," Sadie continued, which she followed with a slight giggle.

"Damned straight my behind is perfect," LeShawna stated proudly. It was Heather's turn to be the one to roll her eyes in disgust, which she was fortunate was not noticed by the others.

"But she does, like, really like to say bad things about some of us if there's, like, no dirt for her to report and all," Katie noted.

"I know, right?" Sadie added. "Remember when she, like, called Geoff and Bridgette 'Gidgette,' and said that the relationship was, like, all show and no substance." There was little doubt that the sentence had the clear and undivided attention of the couple in question.

"Excuse me?" Bridgette asked, a mixture of shock, disbelief, and anger in the tone of her voice.

"She said that, like, all you two ever do is suck face and stuff," Katie explained in a worried voice. "And that, like, if you guys ever actually stopped kissing, like, long enough to talk, then you guys would, like, combust or something."

"We would combust?" Bridgette repeated, nearly shrieking over what she had just heard.

"Okay, now I really hate that woman," Geoff proclaimed. "How dare she make fun of me and my girl like that."

"You two do kiss a lot," Eva pointed out.

"That doesn't mean there's no substance in our relationship," Bridgette stated sternly and defensively. "There happens to be times when we're able to go about our business without cameras having to be present every waking moment of our lives. To critique our relationship solely on what is shown on camera makes her a very ignorant woman."

"Sh'yeah, really," Geoff said, nodding his head in agreement. "It's like that chick has no soul. She probably farts and burps when no one is looking. Maybe even at the same time." The thought of such imagery made some of them shutter in disgust.

"Eeeeewww!" Katie and Sadie squirmed in unison. "That's so gross!"

"Now that's something I'd like to see," Eva stated with a chuckle.

The discussion came to an immediate end when the bell rang. Meaning that it was time for them to concentrate their efforts on their studies. Those who were not seated got to their chairs and waited as patiently as they were willing until the professor walked in and made his way over to his desk.

"Good afternoon, class," the professor stated. "It's the last week of the quarter, so let's get you ready for your exams. For three weeks, we have been talking about the Platt Amendment. It was passed in nineteen-hundred and six..."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Bridgette - "Okay, so I lost my cool a bit after Katie and Sadie me how that horrible woman Blaineley described my relationship with Geoff. I just don't like when people try to judge others without knowing all of the facts. I mean, look what happened to poor Zeke because of it."

Geoff - "You know, I'm generally a mellow kinda guy. Talk to all my bras and they'll tell you that I'm a cool dude. But that Blaineley chick, man. I don't like her. I really don't like her. Just saying her name can suck all the fun outta places."

Justin - "The things these people talk about. What some older woman said about them, how they're being mocked by other schoolgirls. Blah, blah, blah. Perhaps you can see why I barely engage in any of the conversations. It's dull, it's boring, and a complete waste of time. You know what is worth spending time talking about? Janet. More specifically, how she and I will hook up."

DJ - "You know, there is one thing I don't really like about bein' placed in a group away from the other students. I don't get to see someone like Janet as often I'm startin' to wanna. She's a very nice person and I'd like to think we could get along just fine."

Owen - /_Holds coffee mug suitably sized for him._/ "Izzy has been getting me to try out tea lately. I never knew tea could be so tasty. So many flavors to choose from." /_Starts to speak really fast._/ "There's blueberry, raspberry, ginseng, sleepytime, green tea, green tea with lemon and honey, liver disaster, ginger with honey, ginger without honey, vanilla almond, white truffle coconut, chamomile, blueberry chamomile, decaf vanilla walnut, constant comment, and earl grey." /_Giggles and speaks normally._/ "I couldn't decide on one so I'm drinking all at the same time." /_Downs tea, including tea bags, in a few gulps._/ "Tastes good!" /_Pauses then drops unconscious on the floor._/

Heather - "How dare these people mock me. How dare they believe I'm dating the sexist home school. They have no idea that they just crossed with the wrong girl. They are all going to pay. Make no mistake about it. Just like the bastard responsible for making that f-/**censored**/-ing tape. I am putting my foot down!" /_Slams her foot down, but it doesn't hit the ground. Hits something that causes a fart noise and releases a green colored gas into the room. Heather becomes terrified and begins coughing and gagging._/ "Oh God!" /_Coughs some more._/ "Owen! What the hell are you still doing here?"

* * *

**(Week 9, Day 2 – Tuesday)**

**(The Smarty Pants)**

"'Neo,' meaning 'new'..." the professor said as he began writing on the board. "And 'lithic'..." He paused to make sure he was spelling the word correctly, which made some of the students laugh softly. "I-T-H-I-C, meaning 'stone.'" After he finished writing the word, he turned to the class and jerked his thumb at an illustration that was next to the word. "All right, let's get back to this site. Turkdean Barrow, near Hazelton. Contains a central pas-passage and three chambers, or cysts..."

The students paid attention to the lesson being taught, writing down notes as they went along. The usual group doing the same, though Courtney seemed to be trying to write down word for word everything that was being said. Ezekiel only writing down when he felt it was something he wasn't going to be able to remember off the top of his head.

There was one person who looked as though they weren't paying attention. They actually were, but had the ability to multitask. That being Gwen. She was able to hear and understand what the professor was teaching. Although she was more interested in what was going on in front of her. Noah and Izzy being seated next to each other. Surely a grand source of amusement.

Noah was dead set in ignore Izzy's presence. He merely sat, listened to the professor speak, and wrote down notes. Izzy looked as though she was mimicking the egghead, mirroring his every move. Gwen took a moment to rub her eyes and when she looked back, nothing changed. Except Izzy was now, for whatever reason, wearing a wig. A wig that a complete copy of Gwen's hair design. Gwen literally had to cover mouth to keep from laughing.

"... Don't confuse that with robbing, in which case we mean the removal of the contents of the barrow," the professor continued speaking. "This site also demonstrates one of the great dangers of archeology. Not to life and limb, although that does sometimes take place. No, I'm talking about folklore. In this case, local tradition held that there was a golden coffin buried at the site, and this accounts for the holes dug all over the barrow and the generally poor condition of the find. However, chamber three was undisturbed, and the undisturbed chamber and the grave goods that were found in another, uh..."

The students were still writing down notes, not recognizing that the professor had suddenly become distracted. The only person who took note of this was Gwen simply because she too was looking at what had captured the professor's attention. Once again, Izzy was still copying Noah twitch for twitch. This time, she was now wearing a wig that copied Courtney's hair design.

"... In the area, give us a r-" the professor tried to continue, only to be further distracted. He had only looked away briefly and when he eyed Izzy once again, he found that she was now wearing a wig copying Harold's hair design. She was even wearing his style of glasses. "Uh... reason to da... to, uh, to-to date this, uh, find as we have. Um..." The bell rang, causing him to look up for a short moment. He looked back and found that Izzy had now taken Ezekiel's toque and was wearing it. "Any questions, then?" None of the students answered. "No? Okay, that's it for the day, then." The students stood of from their seats and began making their way out of the classroom. "Um... don't forget, our exam will be Friday. Michaelson, chapters four and five for afterward. And I will be in my office on Thursday, but not Wednesday."

The group slowly began making their way out. Just as he was leaving his seat, Ezekiel began to notice that something seemed off. Instinctively, he felt his head for his toque and found it missing. Izzy then suddenly emerged in front of him. A big smile on her face and his toque on her head.

"Here you go, Zeke!" Izzy declared, taking the toque off her head and placing it on top of his. "It proved to be of good use." She then turned and skipped off. Leaving Ezekiel to freeze in place before slowly lifting his hands up and pulling the toque down over his eyes.

"Think of it this way, short stuff," Gwen said as she approached Ezekiel and patted him on the back. "She means well. She's just doing it her own way."

"It's j'oost t'oo scary, eh," Ezekiel managed to utter as he was pushed gently by Gwen to get moving and follow along with the rest of the group out of the classroom. "D'oos she have t'oo be s'oo f'oorcef'ool?"

"I'm sure she's not doing so on purpose, Zeke," Gwen replied. "Only she thinks things on a different level than the rest of us. Problem is, no one seems to know how to pull her down to our realm."

"'oowen seems t'oo be able t'oo talk t'oo her," Ezekiel noted, looking for some hope of there being a sense of logic to understanding the crazy girl.

"Yeah, well, Owen likes Izzy for who she is," Gwen responded. "He sees no point in bringing her down to our level, so he merely tags along for whatever roller coaster ride she's on."

"B'oot d'oosn't he get h'oort when he's with Izzy?" Ezekiel asked. "Like whenever she stays in his r'oom 'oon s'oom nights."

"Sorry, Zeke," Gwen said in reply. "But things that happen when those two are alone together in his room at night are things I never ever want to even think about. That is the kind of stuff nightmares are made of and I'd like to be able to never have them at all."

Up ahead, the rest of the group was proceeding onwards. It was roughly around lunch time, so they were making their way to the cafeteria. Along the way, a group of girls passed by. But before they could move out of sight, Izzy emerged suddenly in front of them. Once again wearing Ezekiel's toque.

"Hi," the redhead said, as though she were Ezekiel and tried to sound like him. "My name is Ezekiel, eh. And I've changed my views 'oon girls. A'yup. I think they're really c'oot and pretty and really, really smart, t'oo. S'oo w'ood any 'oof y'oo like t'oo g'oo 'oot with me? I'm n'oot g'ooin' 'oot with that meanie Heather."

The girls were completely creeped out by what they were witnessing. They looked to one another for a moment and then slowly began to back away. When the time came, the turned and bolted, trying to run away as quickly as possible. Not daring to look back to see if Izzy followed after them. The rest of the group watched all this take place, most with perplexed looks on their faces.

"Aww, poo," Izzy pouted. "That didn't work." With a sigh, Izzy skipped over to Ezekiel, who was once again in a state of fright, and placed his toque back on his head. "Don't worry, Zeke. We'll get you a nice girlfriend for you soon enough."

"Not when you're actions send every girl running for the hills," Noah noted.

Izzy turned and glared at him for a moment. He merely stared back without flinching. Suddenly, she then dropped down and zipped back up, managing to somehow be standing next to Courtney. What's more, Izzy was wearing the Courtney wig Gwen had seen her wear earlier.

"What is the matter with you, Noah?" Izzy said as she mimicked Courtney's personality from the way she moved to the way she talked. All while trying to sound like her. "Must you be a cynic towards every one and every thing. It's astonishing that anyone would ever consider wanting you for a boyfriend. Why can't you take from Katie's example and be nice?"

Izzy then dropped down and once more zipped back up next to someone else. This time it was Harold, wearing a wig that copied his hair style and glasses that were of the same design as the ones he wore. As before, she mimicked his personality and tried to sound like him when she talked.

"Well then maybe your boyfriend could take that same advice since he is your boyfriend, Courtney," Izzy said as Harold. "Gosh!"

The next person she mimicked was Beth. Wearing a wig that copied her hair style and wearing glasses that were of the same design as the ones she wore.

"But you guys," Izzy said as Beth. "How can any of this be helping Zeke get a girlfriend? All you're ever doing is scolding each other and not actually doing anything."

The next person Izzy impersonated was Cody.

"Well, they're not exactly trying to help Zeke get a girlfriend in the first place," Izzy said as Cody. "Izzy is doing all of the work by herself and she hasn't really gotten any assistance."

The last person Izzy impersonated was Gwen.

"We might as well, then," Izzy said as Gwen. "We owe her that much. It's the least could do after having to enlist her to break up the fights Courtney and Duncan were having with Harold and LeShawna. With me and Trent already trying to get Harold and LeShawna's relationship rolling, I guess it won't be so bad helping Zeke find a girlfriend."

Once again, Izzy dropped down. This time, she zipped up in front of the group, no longer wearing wigs. Instead, she had her arms crossed and her nose in the air, looking quite stern. Most of the group looked utterly dumbfounded while Ezekiel appeared frightened and both Gwen and Noah made no expression. After a seemingly uncomfortable moment of silence, Izzy raised a pinky up to her face, gently pulled down a bottom eye lid, and blew a raspberry. Then she turned and skipped away toward the cafeteria, leaving the rest of the group behind in a further state of confusion.

"Um..." Beth managed to utter. "What just happened?"

"I d'oon't get it, eh," Ezekiel said in a worrisome tone.

"Maybe Izzy has finally snapped," Harold suggested.

"Nope," Noah responded. "She hasn't snapped. In her sense of reality, there is no such thing as insanity. It just requires work sometimes to decipher what it is she's saying to us."

"Well, I think what she said was pretty clear," Cody quipped, entering into the conversation rather nervously. "She wants us to help her in getting Zeke a girlfriend."

"She honestly expects us to get involved?" Courtney questioned. There was a slight whining in her tone, as if she needed to be defensive. "We're supposed to willingly take part in this, too?"

"Do you wanna imagine what she'll do if we refuse?" Gwen noted. This had everyone pause to think about her words for a moment. Then they sighed in defeat. Gwen turned to Ezekiel and placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sorry, short stuff. Looks like you're gonna have a lot more people trying to get you hooked up with a girlfriend."

Ezekiel responded by slowly bringing his hands up and once again pulling his toque down over his eyes.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - /_Is about to speak when she sniffs, catching a whiff of the smell from yesterday that still lingers. Begins to cough and gag before hanging a car air freshener on the electric fish hanging on the Z necklace. Begins catching her breath._/ "Dear God... The things I have to put up with in order to get to where I want to be in life..."

Ezekiel - "It's n'oot that I d'oon't appreciate Izzy bein' all friendly and helpf'ool, eh. And I'd like t'oo think she's a friend. B'oot I d'oon'oo if I can handle bein' ar'oond her any l'oonger than I have t'oo. She's j'oost s'oo... intense, eh."

Beth - "That was so strange. All Izzy had to do was simply ask us to help her. She didn't have to go around impersonating us and make up some conversation that's supposed to get her point across. If Noah or Gwen hadn't been around, I don't think I would have gotten it."

Noah - "Trying to find logic to Izzy's method of madness is like trying to find logic in the Dragonball universe. It doesn't exist. The difference is you can change the channel on Dragonball. Izzy ain't gonna disappear just because you want her to."

Izzy - /_Wearing a pirate uniform, has parrots Macadamia and Hornbeam on each shoulder._/ "Alonzo, the cruelty-free pirate surveys the fat and lumbering treasure galleon from the deck of his sleek forty-gun corsair. They heave to, knowing we could cut them to pieces with a single volley. The corpulent, bejeweled merchant captain begs for mercy, but I have none to give. My gold-maddened crew demands the lusty swag in your holds. And they're greedy for your blood. They ready the guns. They gather cutlass and side arm for the boarding party, but I order all weapons put away." /_Holds up same mug Owen had earlier, downs entire drink in one gulp._/ "Because Alonzo, the cruelty-free pirate plans to kill you with kindness!" /_Cackles._/  
Macadamia - /_Squawks._/ "Kindness."  
Hornbeam - /_Squawks._/ "Cruelty-free."

* * *

**(Week 9, Day 3 – Wednesday)**

Katie giggled as she picked up a cherry by the steam. She then snuggled up from her position, sitting on Noah's lap as he sat on one of the heavenly comfortable couches in Casa Loma. She giggled some more when she started lightly waving the cherry in front of him. Noah himself was not exactly paying attention to the cherry or to the book that he had open in his hand. His eyes were looking directly at her with a smirk cracking from one side of his face.

"Ahh..." she said in a quiet, gentle voice. Trying to coax him into opening his mouth and repeating after her. When he remained silent, she merely giggled even more and cuddled up to where she placed her head upon his. Then she tried again. "Ahh..."

"Ahh..." Noah repeated, finally relenting and opening his mouth just enough for her to stick the cherry in. After a slight moment, he closed his mouth until his teeth came upon the cherry from both the top and the bottom. Katie then pulled back, which in turn pulled the steam out of the cherry. Noah closed his mouth fully and began chewing on the cherry while Katie resumed her giggling.

As Noah continued to chew slowly, Katie gently moved her head so that while he was still placed against his, she was now face to face. Another giggle escaped from out of her closed lips, which were curved very much into a wide smile. Her eyes twinkling, like that of a puppy. Noah finished chewing the cherry and swallowed, letting silence fill the atmosphere for a moment. Seconds later, they both brought their lips together for a kiss.

Katie squealed with utter delight, snuggling up some more before she reached over to the bowl of cherries on the nearby coffee table and recycling the process all over again. A process that was being observed by Gwen, Bridgette, and LeShawna. All three were watching while relaxing in their bathing suits in the Jacuzzi.

"Damn that girl got it bad for him," LeShawna noted. "It's like all she ever thinks about is smotherin' him with love. Definitely some kinda freaky Katie is."

"Maybe you can learn a thing or two on how to get your relationship with Harold going," Bridgette teased. The thought making all three girls laugh.

"Nah," LeShawna said. "If I ever did anythin' like that, it be too much for Harold to handle. Much like takin' after you and yo man would be a bad idea, surfer girl."

"I doubt many couples would wanna model their relationship after Bridgette and Geoff," Gwen teased further.

"Oh, stop it," Bridgette responded, splashing some of the water at the other girls while all three continued to laugh along. "You should have been there when I went off a bit when I was told what that horrible Blaineley woman said about our relationship."

"Girl, she was on the verge of boilin' over," LeShawna added. "Surfer girl got all huffy and her man was all mad and stuff."

"Never thought something could get under the skin of someone as laid back as Geoff," Gwen stated. "Guess it's just another reason why I don't watch television. There's nothing good on."

"It's another reason I'm better off not having one in the first place," Bridgette proclaimed.

"And yet here we are," LeShawna declared. "A trio of television stars." This caused the three to once again laugh, only this time as a result of the irony that had been said. Once they had their fill of laughter, the girls eased into a state of silence while they allowed themselves to relax a little more in the Jacuzzi.

"You know what else is funny?" Gwen said, breaking the silence. "The show itself. This show, that is. We obviously hate it with a passion for all the crap they do to abuse us. But at the same time, it has actually provided some good things to happen in our lives."

"Like what?" Bridgette asked curiously.

"Well, we're attending a very prestigious boarding school, which could be the stepping stone in setting our careers for life," Gwen began to explain. "We've met our respective boyfriends on the show. And just as importantly, we met each other. And quite frankly, you guys are the best of friends I've ever had."

"Same here," LeShawna stated.

"Me too," Bridgette agreed.

"I hate to admit it, but I'm actually glad to have been dared by my brother to sign up for the show," Gwen continued. "It's done some good for me that I otherwise would not have been able to experience had I not gone through all of Chris' bull-/**censored**/."

* * *

**(Confession Cam – Now with Car Air Freshener)**

Chris - /_Looks unimpressed._/ "Gee, thanks."

* * *

"I guess that's a good way to look at it," Bridgette said with a relaxed sigh. "I doubt the most of us came onto the show to make friends. A good many of them were probably interested in getting that $100,000 Owen ended up getting. But gosh I feel so fortunate to have met Geoff and you guys."

"And it's a lot more than a friendship we share, you know," LeShawna added. "Our bond is a lot stronger for us to be simply friends. We definitely like sista's, you dig?"

"I can see that about our friendship," Gwen replied. "Certainly as close with one another as though we were sisters. Much closer than I've been with my other friends back home."

"Can you just imagine if the three of us really were sisters?" Bridgette asked, laughing as she spoke. "Not because of the way we look, but because of who we are? Me the surfer, Gwen the loner, and LeShawna being large and in charge?" Once again, the three friends shared a good laugh at the thought of what they were saying. "Just think of how things would be like with the three of us as sisters and how that would have played out if boys tried to hook up with us."

"Now that would be something chaotic," Gwen said as she laughed. "All the boys trying to ask Bridge out. She doesn't want her sisters feeling left out, so she tries to talk one of them into ask me out. I nail him in the privates because I wanna be left alone. And LeShawna gets in his face even though I had just injured him." Now the girls were howling with laughter.

"Woo boy, that would be somethin' else," LeShawna managed to utter as they eased their enjoyment so that they could talk coherently again.

"Or how about if our real boyfriends would have tried to hook up with us if we were sisters," Bridgette suggested. "Can you imagine what Geoff would have to go through before he could finally be able to take me out on a date?"

"If we were sista's, I doubt we'd let him kiss you as much as you two do now," LeShawna noted. The girls had a minor laugh as Bridgette splash some water at LeShawna.

"I think you'd be flabbergasted, LeShawna, at the idea that Trent would honestly want to date me," Gwen said. "But think about the faces Bridgette and I would have to see you going out with a guy like Harold. And all the time we would spend to prepare him for your dates."

The girls once again roared with laughter. Sometimes clutching their stomachs they were laughing so hard. Gwen nearly slid down below the surface of the Jacuzzi water while Bridgette stood up and nearly walked into the waterfall as she paced about. When they finally eased, they returned to their previous sitting positions as they sighed and relaxed.

"You know what else about us?" LeShawna asked, breaking the moment of silence that had been in the air. "Seems like whenever we get goin' like we are right now, it feels like we still be in summer. Just goin' about doin' our thing and lettin' go of all the care in the world."

"Certainly helped us get through the horrors they were throwing at us on the island," Gwen said in response. "And it's helping us get through whatever horrors they throw at us here."

"Kind of like how summer is still going on even though the actual season has long since ended," Bridgette summarized from the more previous statement made by LeShawna. "As if summer will last forever so long as the three of us are together."

"I hate to sound as cynical as Noah, but that sounds just so corny," Gwen commented.

"Well, it is yo job to be the cynic of the three of us," LeShawna pointed out. Gwen laughed softly and shrugged. "It's the idea that I like, you know. Us girls, best of friends that we be like sista's, we have a good time together like it still be summer."

"And if you thought my analogy was corny, you're gonna love what I have to say next," Bridgette said with a slight giggle. "Perhaps we should have a name for ourselves. Something like... Sisterhood of Eternal Summer."

"Okay, now that's ungodly cheesy," Gwen declared as the girls began to laugh. "Sisterhood of Eternal Summer? Tell me you didn't watch that awful _Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants_ one day and thought our friendship should be like that."

"Well, it was either that or Sisterhood of the Lunar Rose," Bridgette responded through laughter. "I thought those were some really good names and described the strong bond we have for one another."

"Hey, if there gonna be names to label us together, we might as well be the ones to name ourselves," LeShawna pointed out to Gwen. "Sista'hood of Eternal Summer sounds a lot better than whatever names I could come up with."

"Well, if you guys like it, I won't mind," Gwen said with a shrug. "As cheesy as it sounds, Sisterhood of Eternal Summer I'm willing to be part of then some god awful name by Heather or Chris that may end up sticking. Like you said, LeShawna. Better that we name ourselves."

"Then it's settled," Bridgette proclaimed. "We're the Sisterhood of Eternal Summer. The best of friends who are like sisters and enjoy life together as though it was still summer."

"Amen to that, girl," LeShawna stated.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "Sisterhood of Eternal Summer, huh..." /_Raises a curious brow then shrugs._/ "They wanna call themselves that, so be it. Who am I to tell them otherwise?"

Bridgette - "No, I didn't come up with the name after watching _Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants_. I've never even seen that movie. It was just something I thought best described the three of us together."

Gwen - "Cheesy name for sure, but I'm not gonna bust Bridge's chops over it. Though I am curious to know what made her also think of using Sisterhood of the Lunar Rose. Can't recall us ever getting together when a full moon is out and being surrounded by roses. Would make a cool image though."

* * *

**(Week 9, Day 4 – Thursday)**

Chris McLean patiently tapped his right foot on the ground while waiting outside the door. The door that would lead into a room where all kinds of trouble was going to happen. He and the producers were going to have themselves a good old fashioned interrogation. Now it was just a matter of waiting for the guilty to arrive so that they could get the party started.

"Mr. McLean," a monotone voice spoke. Chris looked over to see a man with combed back hair, wearing a full suit, and sunglasses stood before him with absolutely no expression present on his face. Looking very much a like a dead ringer from head to toe to Mr. Black. "We have retrieved the two individuals of interest as requested."

"Has any one ever told you and your buddies all look exactly like the kiddies' homeroom professor?" Chris asked, momentarily changing the subject. "You sure you guys aren't related to him?"

The man said nothing, remaining perfectly frozen in place as four bodies came into view. Two of them were very much the splitting image of the man Chris had just spoken to. The other two were teenagers, one girl and one boy. The two guilty individuals that Chris has been waiting for, being brought to him in handcuffs as though they were criminals being sent to jail.

"Are the handcuffs absolutely necessary?" the boy asked frustration. He carried a Latin accent in his voice.

"We have been instructed to bring you in under cautionary means, Mr. Burromuerto," one of the suited men replied in the expressionless monotone voice. The mention of the boy's last name caused Chris to laugh rather gleefully.

"Nice last name you got there, dude," Chris said to the boy, still chuckling. "I bet you got a cool nickname out of it. Alejandro The Dead Donkey. Has a good ring to it I think."

"Ha-ha," Alejandro responded sarcastically. "Very funny, Chris."

"I know, huh," Chris retorted with another chuckle. He then turned his attention to the girl and sighed. "You know, Sierra, I thought for sure getting you involved in that Twenty-Four Hour Off-Campus Challenge we did a couple weeks back woulda satisfied your desire to be on the show."

"O-M-G, it did, Chris," the violet-haired girl said in an excited voice. "I got to have so much fun hanging out with some of the guys. Seeing them in those cute little pink nurses outfits." She started to giggle at the thought, which made both Chris and Alejandro roll their eyes. The suited men, as usual, showed no expression whatsoever. "I appreciate you letting me be on the show, but I never got the chance to meet the one person I've always wanted to be with." She then let out a loving sigh. "My hero, Cody."

"And people wonder why we celebrities don't like stalkers," Chris muttered aloud.

"So what exactly are we doing here?" Alejandro asked, not wanting to listen to Sierra any more than he had to. "Are you actually considering put us on the show since we deserve to be?"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves, Alejandro," Chris replied. "This is a meeting with myself and the producers, but that doesn't necessarily mean we're convinced to put you losers on the show just because you demand to be. There are thousands of kids from around the world like you and do you see them here with you? N'uh-uh. So we're gonna have a little chat about some of the things you two have been doing with regards to trying to get onto the show through unofficial means."

"You can't prove I sent that tape to _Celebrity Manhunt_," Alejandro stated in a defensive tone. "I possess nothing that would suggest I was responsible."

"But I wasn't trying to get onto the show this time," Sierra said, trying to plead her case. "I've already been on the show, we just made mention to it."

"Okay, then lemme rephrase with regards to your predicament, Sierra," Chris said. "You're here because school officials were not happy that you managed to sneak into campus and tried to climb into your hero's room in the middle of the night. Richmore Academy does not like it when people who are not supposed to be there break in and are demanding we do something about it since it obviously has to do with our show." Chris turned to the suited men and nodded his head toward the door. "Go ahead and bring them in, boys. I need to make a trip to the commode real quick."

As the suited men did as they were told in bringing Alejandro and Sierra into the room, Chris made his way over to the other side of the hall and into the bathroom. He did his business and washed his hands. When he came out, he found himself coming face to face with a rather unexpected visitor.

"Good to know that you wash your hands, Chris McLean," the visitor said in a seemingly sultry voice.

"Contrary to all the gossip your show seems to enjoy bringing to light, I do have manners, Blaineley O'Halloran," Chris responded, narrowing his eyes to glare at the other suspiciously.

"Is that so?" Blaineley asked, letting out a scoffing laugh as she adjusted herself in her leaning position next to the door where Chris needed to go through. "I do not seem to recall you or your fellow producers displaying any form of manners when you tried to ream us on the phone regarding what we aired on Sunday."

"Perhaps it would have something to do with that fact that you and your show's producers were not complying with our demand for you to hand over the tape in the first place," Chris stated, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Need I remind you that it is within our legal right as journalists that we do not have to hand over station property, such as video tape given to us anonymously to air on television?" Blaineley questioned in a mocking manner.

"You're just jealous that you passed up on being the host of _Total Drama Island_ in the first place because you weren't smart enough to consider negotiating your way into also becoming one of the show's producers," Chris pointed out rather gleefully. "Thereby missing out a whole lotta money, a whole lotta fame, and are instead stuck on some crummy tabloid magazine show with a D-list wannabe who gets off on watching cheap cat fights."

It was Blaineley's turn to glare at Chris for a moment, but took a deep breath to regain her composure. "You can insult me all you want, Chris McLean," she said in a rather stern voice. "But the fact of the matter remains that without the tape, you've got no proof that Alejandro Burromuerto was responsible for making it. And because no criminal act has been made in relation to it, you've got no legal ground to force the tape out of our hands."

Chris stared at Blaineley, until a sudden realization came to mind as he raised an intrigued brow. "You know, there's no real reason for you to be here to gloat that in front of me," he began to say. "That is, unless you have something in mind about how you are willing to hand us the tape."

"Very astute of you, McLean," Blaineley said with another slight laugh escaping her lips. She then reached into her purse and pulled the very object of their conversation. "While you people can't do anything to force me to hand this over to you, I am a fair woman who is open to negotiating it over to you. So long as the conditions suit my fancy."

Chris thought about it for a moment. After a while, he merely shrugged. "What did you have in mind, Ms. O'Halloran?" he asked.

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Car Air Freshener hanging from Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

Been a long time since I last updated this story, huh. Well, a lot has happened over the last several months. The last sixteen months, as a matter of fact. I'm the go-to-guy in my family to take care of my grandparents on a nearly daily basis, in particular my grandfather. Some of you probably know already, but he passed away a couple months ago. It's been a trying time for everyone in the family. I'm still doing my daily routine in taking care of my grandmother. If you wish to send condolences, please send them through PM.

The other thing that has kept me from updating this story any sooner is that there is another major story that I write that had not been updated in a much longer period. And that's a story I've been working on for a very long time. I felt I owed it to my readers of that story to get that one updated first before getting this one updated. Besides, the long wait allowed me to retool some of the things I had previously intended for this story and I think I have a better idea of where everything is going.

I would also like to point out that **The Kobold Necromancer** and I have taken our respective stories to that next level of insanity. Our own Wiki sites for them. Necro had his series _Total Drama Comeback_ and _Total Drama Battlegrounds_ developed for him by a doting fan while that ended up inspiring me to go the chaotic route in developing one for _Total Drama Academy_. Because there's already a Wiki with that name, mine is **Richmore Academy Wiki**. Simply type in richmoreacademy . wikia . com and there you have it. It's still in the developmental stages, so you're gonna have to pardon my constant editing of the sucker. And I apologize in advance if I end up being anal retentive and edit something out that you guys put up. No disrespect by it, just that I'm not even close to having the majority of the original stuff up and I'm still working my way around working with a Wiki to call me own.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** I Triple Dog Dare You to guess what it is!


	29. Week 9, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Twenty-Nine

**(Week 9, Day 7 - Friday)**

"Ladies and gentlemen!" a voice announced, echoing from the speakers mounted through the Marshmallow. It was very apparent that the voice belonged to Chef Hatchet. "Introducin' yer host... Chris McLean!"

Much to the disbelief of the competitors on the stage, the entire amphitheater exploded in cheers and applauds. In the midst of all this, they were pretty sure they could hear music beginning to play over the speakers. When the song hit a specific cue, the spotlight shined suddenly onto the stage and directly upon Chris McLean himself, arms wide open as if to fully take in all of the apparent love directed toward him.

Chris was dressed in a seemingly traditional Japanese kimono garb for a male. Dark blue top, tan bottom, a black belt, and black sandals over white socks. He also held in his right hand a white paper fan that was currently folded. Some of the contestants were able to make out the song that was playing before it faded out, determining that it was "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" by Weezer. Just another reason for them to despise him.

"Narcissist," Gwen muttered under a cough.

"Greetings, oh students of Richmore Academy!" Chris stated to the audience. "Welcome back to the Marshmallow and welcome to the final edition of Challenge Night for the first quarter in the present school term!" The student once again cheered and applauded to the announcement. "It's one more opportunity to put your favorite Total Drama contestants through some torturous fun and excitement before you kiddies take off on a much deserved two week break from your studies. In compliance with the school officials, we will not be running any Challenge Night competitions during that time."

While the audience moaned with displeasure upon hearing this, the competitors were more than relieved. They did not have to continue dealing with these challenges while they were trying to recharge from their academic hardships.

"Fortunately, we're going to send you off on your two week break in style," Chris continued. "For tonight, there will be not one, but two challenges!" The audience cheered at this revelation while the contestants groaned. "That's right, we got two challenges to run our poor saps through with the rewards being great and the consequences more terrifying than they could possibly imagine."

"I dunno," Noah noted in a grumble. "We can imagine a lot worse than you think."

"But before we get started with all of the fun and excitement, there's one minor thing we need to address," Chris announced. "We wouldn't be the hottest thing going if we didn't have a pair of troublemakers looking to obtain their own fifteen minutes of fame at the expense of our own would-be celebrities. By now, I'm sure you folks have at least heard about how last week's winners engaged in their dinner date prizes was videotaped and aired on some fifth-rate tabloid show."

"He just had to bring that up," Heather fumed through her teeth, crossing her arms over her chest. "How much more humiliating can this get?" She took no notice of the glares she was receiving from some of the others.

"In case there are some of you in the audience who haven't seen it, here's a clip of what was taped," Chris said with a chuckle.

The eyes of all twenty-two competitors shot wide open as they witnessed the infamous videotape being viewed on the giant screen. It was a relatively short clip of Heather and Ezekiel eating dinner, but it was more than enough to cause many in the audience to let out whistles and cat calls. Heather was now furious while Ezekiel, having turned pale white, pulled his toque as far down over his eyes as possible.

"Let's just say that if any one was going to embarrass our contestants, it would be us," Chris stated after the clip was finished being shown, still chuckling. "It took some convincing, but we managed to secure the master tape. And just as I suspect, there's more to the story than was aired on Celebrity Manhunt."

Immediately, all eyes turned to Heather and Ezekiel. Heather's cheeks started to burn as intensely as the rage that was engulfing her every being. Ezekiel started to shrink further and further into himself, likely to be found in a fetal position soon enough.

"I'm sure we would all love to pressure Heather and Ezekiel into revealing the details of their dinner date," Chris noted with a large, gleeful smile on his face. "But we have a tight schedule to keep to. Let us get things rolling by first introducing a pair of special guests. Please give an appropriate jeer as we welcome... Alejandro and Sierra!"

The amphitheater stage lights dimmed and siren and warning lights began to flash all about. An interesting piece of music played, which included various kinds warning sounds. A gust of smoke emitted from the center of the stage and soon a pair of seated figures could be made out. A spotlight shined on them, revealing a male and female strapped to chairs slowly moving forward.

The male looked seemingly like a Latin version of Justin only with longer hair, a stub of hair under his lips, lime green eyes as opposed to blue, and a small bull skull for a necklace. He was obviously the one named Alejandro. The female had various colors of violet and purple in her hair that was tied up in one big ponytail. She was obviously the one named Sierra. In addition to being strapped down, both were also wearing restraint masks that would be suitable for the likes of Hannibal Lecter.

The audience, as instructed, began booing the newcomers. Heavy boos were raining down upon the stage while the original twenty-two contestants looked on with bewilderment. They were not entirely sure where Chris was going with all of this. The music faded and the amphitheater stage lights came back up.

"Now for those of you who like to surf the 'net and Google all that you can find on Total Drama, you're very likely to have run into the numerous web blogs Sierra here wrote," the self-proclaimed handsome host stated, moving towards the seated female and pointing at her with the paper fan in hand. "How numerous? How about one for every contestant. We liked her enough that we used her for our off-campus challenge a couple weeks ago, but apparently that did not satisfy her craving. Seems there's one contestant in particular she goes completely bonkers for and when he did not show up in that challenge, she decided to figure ways to sneak into the campus. School officials were far from happy about this and demanded that we deal with her before she got herself too seriously hurt by the various guard dogs posted by the walls. And so we brought her here to do just that."

"I can't thank you enough for this," Sierra declared, squealing with great joy and anticipation. "I finally get to meet the hunk of my dreams." With a giggle, she turned toward the original twenty-two contestants. After a moment, there was a confused look on her face. "Where's Cody? Wasn't he here a second ago?"

The group raised bewildered brows and then looked amongst themselves. They were finally able to notice that Cody was doing all that he could to not be seen by Sierra. Going so far as to hide behind Owen regardless of the terrifying consequence it brought. With a gasp, Beth dropped down next to the scared techno-geek to try and figure a way to calm him down.

"That girl..." Cody managed to whisper in fright. "She scares me!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "Cody wasn't kiddin'. But damn that Sierra got it hard fo' him."

Cody - /_Cowering behind chair._/ "I know I came onto the show looking to hook up with a girl. But I want it to be something that would be steady and nice. All those girls out there sound as extreme and intense and Izzy. And then there's Sierra..." /_Shudders and whimpers._/ "Some of the things she wrote in that blog of hers..."

Beth - /_Cradling Asphyxia in her arms._/ "I don't have the Internet back home, so I had to ask the others about Sierra and her 'blogs.' Her crush for Cody is so creepy. It's no wonder poor Cody is terrified of her." /_Asphyxia squeals, Beth follows with a giggle._/ "I know, huh. Maybe we should keep Cody preoccupied so he won't have to think too much about that scary girl. Hang out with him some more together. What do you say, Asphyxia? Do you wanna help make Cody feel better?" /_Tickles Asphyxia's belly who then squeals happily._/

* * *

"Moving on to this fine gentleman we have here," Chris continued, stepping back and pointing his fan at the restrained male. "This is Alejandro Burromuerto." The handsome host begins to chuckle. "Love that last name, by the way." He continues to chuckle while Alejandro merely glares at him. "This fellow applied to be part of what was originally supposed to be the second season of our show. Only he messed the deadline period. And then we went with Total Drama Academy. Not happy with his bad luck, Mr. Burromuerto here tried to figure some way to get on the show by force. We've kept him under a pretty good watch for a while. Then he managed to figure out where the dinner dates prizes were going to be and thought it would be a neat idea to spoil the show long before it's scheduled air. In other words, he's the one responsible for that videotape we just showed."

"I demand first dibs in ripping his face off!" Heather hollered. "That bastard deserves to pay for what he did!"

"You can do whatever you like, señorita," Alejandro said. He spoke in a seemingly seductive tone and gave a flirtatious glance at Heather. A look and move that made many females in the audience gasp with ecstasy. For Heather, it only infuriated her.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Fuming._/ "That sonuvabitch thinks he's a sly fox. He's not! He comes within two feet of me, this jungle cat is going to claw that smug face off in one fell move." /_Bares her nails and swipes at the air in front of her._/ "Thinks he's all smooth with that sexy smirk of his." /_Pauses and realizes what she just said._/ "Don't you dare take my words out of context, Chris!"

* * *

"So here's the skinny, boys and girls," Chris announced, moving back toward the audience. "Me and the producers decided that the best way to punish these two suckers is to do the one thing that would truly make them suffer. Put 'em in the show!"

"What?" virtually all of the original twenty-two contestants cried. They weren't alone at making such a reaction as the audience began to murmur in disbelief and bewilderment.

"Settle down and lemme explain," Chris stated. "We're not letting them onto the show entirely. School officials have flat out denied for them to be added to the student body for the remainder of the school term. They can attempt to get in by taking the entrance exam next year, so they'll have to earn their way into being full-fledged cast members. But, we figured that releasing them back into the wild would only intensify their desire to get onto the show. So we felt it would be best if we held onto them as a means of precaution. And since we're gonna do that, we might as well use them for our Challenge Night competitions."

"You mean you guys are actually going to use my idea of stringing them up like piñatas and see who can hit them the most blindfolded?" Duncan questioned with a great deal of enthusiasm. He then received a sharp elbow to the stomach from Courtney.

"Mmmmnnoooooooo..." Chris replied. "Though how I was not present to hear that when it was first suggested, I dunno. That's an idea I wouldn't mind considering, really. Nope, they'll merely be additional obstacles for you kiddies to overcome. Either being involved with some objective you need to achieve or as actual competitors you will be facing. The latter of which we will be doing for our first challenge of the night."

"But wait," Beth said. "If they're competing in a challenge, what happens if they win?"

"Good question, Beth," Chris began to reply. "You get a cookie." The handsome host tossed a cookie to Beth, a sight that made many in the audience cheer. Beth found herself receiving a small milk biscuit shaped like a koala. She took a cautious bite and was instantly in love, tossing the rest into her mouth. "Should these outsiders... You know, I like that name. We have the Smarty Pants and the Others. Might as well call these freaks The Outsiders." Chris chuckled while everyone else on stage either rolled their eyes or glared at him. "Any way... should any one of the Outsiders win, we will take the sum value of their prizes and donate it to the school. Seems like a fair idea, wouldn't you say?"

"So they're just essentially playing for charity?" Trent asked in summarization with a raised brow.

"You could put it that way," Chris answered with a shrug. "The main thing is that they will be the ones receiving punishment should they lose. You guys will be spared. For now."

"I'm sorry, but none of this is making any sense to me," Bridgette stated.

"Too bad," Chris proclaimed. "We're on a tight schedule and we need to get moving with the challenges. First off, the advantages and disadvantages earned from last week will be moved over into the second challenge. So it will be an even playing field for the first one. Tell me, kiddies. Who here is familiar with this game?" The handsome host revealed from behind his back what appeared to be a toy dog in his left hand. He waited a moment to see if any one would recognize it. All he got was a light snicker from Gwen, a groan from Noah, and an uncomfortable sigh from Harold. "I take it you three are familiar with it. All the more fun. This nifty little game is called _Banken Gao Gao_! Or as it's called in English speaking countries, Beware of the Dog!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Noah - "I hate this game. You could be the most skillful person in the world and it would make no difference. It's all just a matter of luck to avoid being the sole loser."

Harold - "This is a hard game to master. It requires a great deal of focus and concentration. But even then you could still find yourself losing the game in a matter of minutes."

Gwen - "We like it in our household. It's the one game my brother and I have no problem playing together with and it is because of it that my mom likes it too. The best way to play it is to just have fun and not be worried about winning or losing."

* * *

"Banken Gao Gao is fairly straight forward," Chris began to explain. "As the dog sleeps, you will try one at a time to pick off a bone from his bowl. But be careful. If the dog senses you, he'll spring awake and bark at you, signifying that you're out. Our challenge tonight will pit you all in a tournament style series of eliminations until only one remains without getting barked at by the dog."

At this point, Chef Hatchet and Jessica made their way out with additional Banken Gao Gao toys to be used. Fitting with the apparent theme of the week, Chef was wearing an orange gi while Jessica wore a traditional female kimono that was navy blue with a magenta belt, maintaining the school colors on her clothes.

"The first round will have you split up into six groups of four," Chris continued. "The group is determined by the order of your placement in the previous week. So one group will be Harold, Heather, Izzy, and Noah since Harold and Heather placed first and Izzy and Noah placed second. The next will be Courtney, Duncan, Gwen, and Trent. All the way down until the last group. That will be made up of Alejandro, Lindsay, Owen, and Sierra."

The contestants went about into their assigned groups. A pair of stage hands looking very similar to Mr. Black released Alejandro and Sierra from their restraints so that they could join in on the game. The first group had Harold, Heather, Izzy, and Noah. The second consisted of Courtney, Duncan, Gwen, and Trent. Third was Beth, Eva, Geoff, and Justin. Fourth was Cody, Katie, LeShawna, and Tyler. Fifth was Bridgette, DJ, Ezekiel, and Sadie. And the last group was Alejandro, Lindsay, Owen, and Sierra.

"You guys can determine whichever order you like," Chris said. "When someone is eliminated, either Chef or Jessica will remove them from the game, place whatever bones they had successfully picked off back into the bowl, and restart the game. When two from a group is eliminated, the survivors will move onto the next round. So whenever you kiddies are ready, you may go."

A bullhorn sounded, followed by the snoring of six toy dogs. The audience gasped and awed in anticipation of what would happen as the twenty-four contents began their first challenge. Almost on a dare, Harold, Noah, and Gwen were pressured into going first by those in their respective groups just to get things going. Gwen was the very first to pick, followed by Harold and then Noah. Suddenly, a vicious bark was sounded that made many jump and nearly scream. All looked over to see that Eva had triggered the dog in her group to awaken.

"Oh, sorry Eva," Chris announced with a chuckle. "You are the first to be out."

"Well that sucked," Eva muttered with a grunt as Chef led her to one side of the stage. Just then, another vicious bark was sounding. Catching everyone off guard, which resulted in a few screams uttered from the audience.

"Well, well, well," Chris said with another chuckle. "Looks like Duncan is not as sneaky as we thought. He's out of the game."

"Never was good at getting past dogs," Duncan grumbled as Jessica led him to join Eva on one side of the stage. "Guess that goes for toy dogs, too. Man this bites."

Just as Chef and Jessica were restarting the games where the dogs had previously woken up, another bark was heard. This was followed by two high pitched screams. Those responsible for the screaming were Lindsay and Owen.

"This ought to be fun," Chris said as he took a good look at the group. "I see that Alejandro, Sierra, and Lindsay each managed to pick off a bone. Owen apparently hasn't, it it appears he's the one who is out."

"That doggy is scary!" Owen cried as Chef led him to one side of the stage to join Duncan and Eva. "He almost bit me!"

"I can only imagine how Lindsay's gonna feel when she gets barked at," Duncan noted in a low voice.

The remaining contestants started to play the game much more cautiously. Each one taking their time to slowly decide which bone to pick and remove it from the bowl without disturbing the dog. Over time, Cody, Ezekiel, and Heather were eliminated in that order. Heather was far from pleased that she was eliminated before Alejandro was and spent the remainder of the challenge giving him a death glare from where she was on the side of the stage. Katie would become the next one out, which meant one group had completed the first round.

"Better luck next time, Katie," Chris said to the crying sweet girl as she joined the others who had been eliminated on the side of the stage. "With Katie eliminated, that means LeShawna and Tyler are moving on to the next round. You guys can head on over to the other side of the stage and wait for the other groups to finish up."

LeShawna let out a relieved sigh while Tyler pumped his fist in the air. Only as he immediately stood up to go to the other side of the stage, he got his feet tangled in his chair, causing him to trip and fall on his face. Nevertheless, the game continued. Justin was the next one eliminated, meaning Beth and Geoff would advance into the next round. Then came an elimination many were looking forward to the most.

"Ay!" Alejandro yelled in anger as the toy dog barked at him. Suddenly, he was whacked really hard in the back of the head by Chef, who was using a giant black paper fan. "That hurt!"

"It's supposed to," Chris stated. "Since you're an Outsider, you get punished for being out. So a harisen slap to the back of the head was warranted. And you get to strapped back down in the chair."

"All this because I videotaped a dinner date?" Alejandro asked in aghast. "What, you're gonna do the same thing to Sierra if she's out simply because she tried many times to sneak a peek at Cody?"

"Yep," Chris answered. "You two wanted to be on the show and, to an extent, we're letting you. But then you haven't been baptized in the fire like the originals, so we're gonna specifically target the two of you for further torturing."

"I fully endorse that!" Heather stated with a wicked smirk on her face.

"Sounds like a fair trade off to me," Duncan said, crossing his arms over his chest and chuckling.

"Me c-/**censored**/ en tus muertos..." Alejandro muttered quietly as he got up. He was about to make his way back to his chair to be strapped down when Chris put his hand up in front of him. "What now?"

"I usually don't mind when you kiddies spew profanity," Chris began to explain. "I even don't mind when they do so to insult me. But what you just said their really went over the line, pal. So you deserve additional punishment." The handsome host then looked off the stage and called out. "Boys, bring out the chinko machine!"

Everyone began to murmur, wondering what Chris had up his sleeve. A group of interns dressed as ninjas ran out with a small looking catapult. The placed it on the ground and then forced Alejandro to stand on the object's platform, holding him in position so he would not move. Many in the audience began to gasp, wondering if this was going to do what they thought it would do.

"¿Qué demonios?" Alejandro managed to utter, looking at the machine he was being placed in with great concern.

"And... activate!" Chris commanded.

As was feared, the catapult-like lever swung up at an incredible fast speed and nailed Alejandro in a very sensitive part of his body. The contestants on stage flinched and squirmed. Many in the audience screamed at what they just saw while the victim immediately dropped to his knees. His eyes opened very wide while his pupils shrink into little dots.

"Eso me dolió..." he managed to utter is a quiet, yet very high-pitched voice. The ninja-clad interns then dragged him over and strapped him back down in the chair he had been introduced in earlier.

"Dude!" Geoff cried. "That is so harsh!"

"Where the hell did you find such abomination?" Courtney asked in horror.

"Can I have one?" Izzy asked in an excited tone.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Duncan - "Man... With a device like that... I'm thinking twice about wanting to mess with Chris..."

Geoff - "Dude... That is such a buzzkiller..."

Chris - "It was a simple matter of establishing authority over Alejandro and Sierra that I brought out the chinko machine. If the Outsiders are very serious about wanting to be on the show, they'll have to earn their way through suffering."

Izzy - "That looked like so much fun! I should get something like that. It would be very useful."

* * *

After things calmed down, the game resumed. Trent and DJ were the next ones out, meaning Courtney and Gwen along with Bridgette and Sadie advanced to the next round. There was one group left that needed someone to be eliminated. In the end, it was Noah who found himself on the receiving end of a barking toy dog.

"Absolutely hate this game," Noah grumbled in frustration as he made his way over to the losing side of the stage while Harold and Izzy made their way to the winning side. He eased a bit when Katie wrapped herself around him for the heck of it.

"So round one has been completed," Chris announced. "Time to move onto the second round of the challenge. The new groups will be arranged based once again upon the order in which the previous group advanced. But we are pitting the fastest against the slowest. So the first group will consist of Harold, Izzy, LeShawna, and Tyler. The second group will be Beth, Bridgette, Geoff, and Sadie. And the last group will be Courtney, Gwen, Lindsay, and Sierra. Much of the same rules apply. You can go in whichever order you please, when two from a group are eliminated the survivors move on."

"You still haven't even told us what we are playing for," Courtney stated while Jessica and Chef removed the unneeded Banken Gao Gao games from the stage. "We better not be playing through this exhausting game just for a dud of a prize."

"Believe me, Courtney," Chris responded, fanning himself with his paper fan. "The rewards could end up becoming most glorious for you by managing to avoid getting barked at."

"Prizes haven't been all that bad yet," LeShawna noted as she sat down in her group. "They've actually been pretty good. So who's to say it won't be any different this time around."

"I suppose you're right," Courtney said with a sigh. "I don't want to feel like we went through all this just be gypped."

"This is so much fun!" Sierra proclaimed in excitement. "I'm getting to play with you guys. If I didn't have to concentrate so much on the game I'd be so L-O-L right now." She let out a slight snort just before she reached in to grab a bone from the bowl. Unfortunately, just as she touched it the dog awoke and barked at her, causing her to scream in surprise.

"Oh, too bad, Sierra," Chris announced. "You are the first one in the second round out of here."

"Aww, poo," Sierra pouted. She then flinched upon being hit in the back of the head by Chef using a harisen, as designated for being one of the Outsiders, before the ninja-clad interns returned to drag her off to be strapped back into her chair. "Oh, before you put the mask on, can I at least tell Cody how much I adore him?" Upon hearing this, Cody immediately hid behind Owen as though doing so would help.

The game continued on at a slow, methodical pace. In time, LeShawna, Geoff, Gwen, and Bridgette were all eliminated in that order. That meant that with Sierra and Gwen's elimination, Courtney and Lindsay advanced to the next round, and with Geoff and Bridgette's elimination, Beth and Sadie advanced as well. When Sadie advanced, Katie was squealing and jumping with joy. However, she maintained her embrace on Noah and he found himself being in awkward leaning positions while his girlfriend expressed the joy she felt at her friend doing so well in the challenge. The last group remaining consisted of Harold, Izzy, and Tyler. They kept going until the most unlikely person to eliminated was barked at.

"Oh, you think you're so tough, huh?" Izzy said, as if she was being challenged by the toy dog. "Well, try this on for size!" She began barking and howling like a dog. She continued to do this until Chef finally managed to simply drag her off to the losing side while she kept on going.

"Hate to think what she does when she encounters a stray dog," Chris managed to say before turning his attention back to the audience. "So now we have six survivors left. Beth, Courtney, Harold, Lindsay, Sadie, and Tyler." As he was announcing, Lindsay was overjoyed that Tyler was still in the game with her that she immediately pounced onto him for a big hug. The sudden gesture of affection caught the jock off guard and both fell to the ground instantly. "Now comes for the most exciting part of the game."

"I think we've already reach that point, dude," Duncan noted aloud.

Chris looked at the delinquent with a confused brow at first. Then he heard kissing noises and looked behind him to see Lindsay and Tyler making out. He turned back to the audience, scratching his chin, and shrugged. "M'kay," he managed to utter. "Now comes the second most exciting part of the game. This final round of Banken Gao Gao will have the six remaining competitors going one at a time by alphabetical order. The toy dog has been calibrated to be much more sensitive, thereby amping the difficulty of removing even a single bone piece without getting barked at. But the rewards will be worth the trouble. Written on each bone piece is a prize. Be the sole survivor and whatever bones you managed to collect will make up your prize for winning this challenge. So if you play enough, you could end up walking off with a great deal of prizes."

"Okay, now we're talking," Courtney said and rubbing her hands upon hearing about the challenge reward.

"I wonder what kind of prizes are up for grabs," Harold thought aloud.

"I'll tell you," Chris responded, even though Harold was not expecting one. "As you've all noticed by now, there were four different colors used for the bones. White, yellow, red, and blue. Each color had ten bone pieces, thereby making the total amount of bones in the bowl forty. The kind of prize and worth you pick is attributed to the color of the bone it is labeled on. White consists of seemingly ordinary prizes, yellow getting more luxurious, then blue. Red being the ones that are of the highest value, but you can bet they will be the most difficult to remove."

"Imagine walking off with all ten red pieces," Beth noted aloud in awe.

"But wait, there's more," Chris announced. "When someone is eliminated, their bone pieces will be confiscated and will not be reintroduced into the game until the remaining survivors manage to pick off all the pieces without waking up the dog. So now you really have to think about strategy. Is being stuck having to pick off a ordinary prize in order to stay alive worth going after a valuable red piece only to make whatever items you've already got no longer in play? So choose carefully when picking your prizes."

While Chef removed the other Banken Gao Gao games from the stage, Jessica brought out the main one and placed it down on the center table. She set the game up and stepped back while the six remaining competitors gathered around it. Since the order was based on the alphabet, Beth would be the first to go.

"Hmmm..." she managed to hum, scratching her head as she carefully studied what was available. "This one looks pretty easy to pick off..." She carefully reached in slowly, picked at the bone piece before withdrawing it from the bowl. The was a loud collective gasp from the audience, awaiting to see if the toy dog would awaken. It did not. "A $20 gift card for iTunes."

"Guess we won't get to the good stuff until much later in the game," Courtney said with a sigh. She got herself comfortable so that she could concentrate and focus. Slowly she reached it, picked at the bone piece, and then removed it from the bowl. "Looks like I got... a hardcover copy of The Red Pyramid."

"My turn," Harold stated. He took a deep breath and slowly picked off the next bone piece. "A DVD of the first season of Deadliest Warrior? Yes! I have been meaning to get this." The contestants continued onward one at a time slowly and displaying a great deal of concentration as they picked off the bone pieces.

"A Melissa and Doug Bake and Decorate Cupcake Set?" Lindsay noted as she read out the prize on her piece. "Wow. Does that mean I get to make my own cupcakes?" No one had the heart to tell her that it was actually a pre-school toy set.

"A Craft-Lite Cutter," Sadie announced, reading off the prize labeled on her piece. She then started to squeal. "Katie could, like, so use this to make new clothes!"

"An 8-inch Exhart Travelocity Gnome?" Tyler said with a confused brow raised. "What am I supposed to do with that?"

"A 55-centimeter TKO Anti Burst Fitness Ball Set?" Beth said. "Sounds kinda interesting."

"So we really are just getting the lesser value prizes out of the way so we won't sacrifice the losing out on the top ones, huh?" Courtney muttered with a sigh. She then reached in carefully and slowly before finally pulling out the next piece without getting barked at. "Well here's a nice one. A 0.13-ounce EDP of Carolina Herrera."

"Oh my gosh, that is, like, such a nice fragrance for you," Lindsay stated to Courtney.

"You know what, I think I am going to risk getting something better," Harold proclaimed. "What is the point of accumulating the best value if we keep playing it safe." Harold slowly and cautiously reached in to pick off a more luxurious piece. But just as he managed to touch it, the dog awoke and barked at him. Some in the audience gasped or screamed at how suddenly it had happened. Harold merely sighed. "Dang!"

"And Harold is out!" Chris announced. "Which means the Season One DVD of Deadliest Warrior will also be confiscated."

Harold walked over to the losing side of the stage. He was met by a comforting pat and then embrace from LeShawna. The remaining five competitors continued, deciding to continue on with staying on the safe side after what happened with Harold.

"A Bunched Satin Evening Clutch!" Lindsay gasped with excitement, which was followed by a squealing cheer. "That is, like, so precious! I can't wait to use it!"

"The special edition of the Born This Way album!" Sadie said. "I, like, love Lady Gaga! I've been so wanting to get this!"

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Eva - "Hearing some of the prizes that's been picked off so far, I feel like I'm glad I went out on this one. Those prizes suck."

Trent - "Well, they're playing it safe, so you can imagine they're merely picking off the cheap prizes. It's what's labeled on the red bones that everyone is very interested in finding out about. Only it's gonna be a while before we get to that point."

* * *

"Ocarina of Time 3D," Tyler stated, reading the prize labeled on his piece. "But I don't have a 3DS. I don't even have a DS."

Beth stuck her tongue out as she took her turn trying to remove a bone piece from the dog bowl. Just as she merely touched it with the tip of her finger, the toy dog awoke and barked at her. "Nuts!" Beth sighed after letting out a high-pitched gasp. Hanging her head, she walked on over to the losing side of the stage.

"There goes Beth," Chris announced. "So the $20 iTunes Gift Card and the Fitness Ball Set are out of play."

"And she was playing it safe like the rest of us," Courtney noted, letting out a worried sigh. She returned to a state of concentration and focus as she slowly went to pick off a bone piece from the dog bowl. "Kodak EasyShare C143 Digital Camera. I've been needing a new camera, so this is good."

"A Singing Machine SML-383 Portable Karaoke Machine," Lindsay stated as she read the label on the bone piece she picked off. "That sounds like a lot of fun to have."

"An Archos Vision 8 gigabyte video MP3 Player," Sadie said in awe. "I, like, can't wait to try it out."

"Whoa, a Victorinox Swiss Army Explorer," Tyler said with a bit of enthusiasm. "Now we're talking."

Courtney stared at the dog bowl for a quiet moment, thinking about what she should do next. After a moment, she let out a sigh. "I'm gonna chance it," she proclaimed. "I'm gonna try to get one of the better prizes." With a great deal of caution, she slowly reached it. She grabbed a red bone piece and pulled it out. The toy dog did not wake. She looked at the label on the piece and let out an excited gasp. "A Kindle DX!" Many in the audience let out a cheer, recognizing that it was a valuable prize indeed.

"I wonder if, like, there's a cute dress in there," Lindsay said aloud in awe. She reached in to grab a bone piece, but then reared back when the toy dog barked at her. She screamed nearly at the top of her lungs when that happened.

"No way," Tyler said, feeling bad that his girlfriend was eliminated.

"Aww, too bad, Lindsay," Chris announced as the blonde cried while making her way to the losing side of the stage. "You lose the Bake and Decorate Cupcake Set, the Satin Evening Clutch, and the Portable Karaoke Machine. Tough break."

Sadie nervously went next, inching her fingers slower and slower into the dog bowl before removing a bone piece. She did not even bother to see what color it was. When the dog did not bark, she let out a sigh of relief and read the label. Then she let out an excited squeal. "A BlackBerry Storm2!" she cried. More of the audience began to cheer and Katie started squealing enthusiastically despite still clutching onto Noah.

"Wouldn't mind getting a 3DS so I can play the game I got," Tyler muttered quietly before reaching into the dog bowl. He pulled out a bone piece, not caring what color it was, and read the label. He raised a curious brow at first then looked over to Lindsay. "Hey babe, I think I got something for you."

"Really?" Lindsay uttered, wiping a tear from out of her eyes. "Aww, that's so sweet of you, Tiger. What is it?"

"It's called a Printed Jacquard Gown," Tyler answered. Many females in the amphitheater gasped in astonishment.

"Tiger!" Lindsay cried in joy. "Oh my gosh, that is so beautiful!"

"You're going to be, like, so gorgeous in that dress!" Katie squealed with equal excitement.

"Perhaps it would be best if you not celebrate just yet," Noah managed to say as Katie's constant squeezing of his body made it harder for him to even catch his breath. "He still needs to avoid getting barked at."

As all of this was going on, Courtney managed to pick off a bone piece from the dog bowl without getting barked at. "A TomTom VIA 1405TM Portable GPS Navigator," she stated in reading the label. "This will be perfect once I get a car."

Sadie went next. But just as she touched a bone piece, the toy dog awoke and barked at her. This caused Sadie and Katie to cry. Being able to properly breath again, Noah now had to keep Katie upright so she would not fall to the ground in sorrow as her best friend lost out on winning the game.

"So close, and yet so far, Sadie," Chris proclaimed. "Your elimination makes the Craft-Lite Cutter, Born This Way album, MP3 Player, and BlackBerry Storm2 ineligible prizes. So it comes down to Courtney and Tyler. Who will be able to avoid getting barked at by the toy dog and walk off with a mess of prizes? Let's find out, shall we."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - "Kind of surprising Sadie made it as far as she did. If I had been host, I'd have at least given her one of the items as a consolation. But no, we instead have a jerk running the show."

Chris - /_Fanning himself with paper fan._/ "We did discuss the idea of letting those who made it into the final round to have a consolation prize. Unfortunately, we're on a tight budget. Even tighter considering the prizes that could end up being won."

* * *

Tyler was next to go. With a deep breath, he reached into the bowl and pulled out a bone piece. The toy dog did not wake up. Tyler then read the label. "Hey, check it out," he said with a chuckle. "Says here I got a Samsung DROID CHARGE 4G Android Phone. That sounds like it's awesome!" The gasp from the audience signified their approval.

"Dude, that's really awesome," Geoff said in amazement. "There is so much you can do with that phone, bra."

"Wow," Courtney said in an exhale. "These prizes are good..." She focused and reached in carefully to claim a bone piece without waking up the toy dog. Upon succeeding, she looked at the label, covered her mouth, and gasped. "Ah... Am I reading this right? I got a Samsung Series 5 3G Chromebook?"

"Shut up!" Cody, Harold, and Noah cried together. The vast majority of the audience had similar reactions of disbelief.

"That is not even out yet and you are getting one?" Harold questioned further. "Lucky!"

Tyler took a deep breath and concentrated. He reached in very slowly and very carefully for a bone piece. He pulled it out very quickly as soon as he touched it. The toy dog did not bark. Relieved, he read the label. His eyes shot wide open and he looked over at Chris. "You serious?" he asked. Chris merely nodded with a gleeful smile on his face. Tyler did a double-take of the bone piece in his fingers, still not believing what was written down on it. "Says here I got a 2011 Vespa S 50 4V."

Every male in the amphitheater were dumbstruck with awe. Trent stomped his right foot once in disbelief. Even Duncan shook his head with amazement. While nearly everyone displayed shock, Geoff took off his hat and let out a cheering cry.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Eva - /_Is stunned._/ "... Well... sh-/**censored**/..."

Gwen - /_Lightly laughing._/ "I'm not going to hear the end of this from Trent. What's worse, he's gotta room with the guy."

* * *

"Please let this piece be a car, please let this piece be a car," Courtney quietly muttered as she reached in for a bone piece from the bowl. Only for the toy dog to awaken and bark at her, causing her to let out a scream of frustration. Even the audience screamed, though purely out of the fact that the intense game was finally over. "No!"

"And there we have it, boys and girls!" Chris declared. "Tyler is the winner of Banken Gao Gao!" As the audience cheered, Tyler pumped his fist in the air in victory. But just before he could let out any sort of cry, he was suddenly pounced upon by Lindsay. They immediately fell to the floor, though whatever pain they may have felt was ignored in favor of the passionate kissing they engaged in. "He has won himself a Travelocity Gnome, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D for the 3DS, a Victorinox Swiss Army Explorer, a Printed Jacquard Gown, a Samsung DROID CHARGE 4G Android Phone, and a 2011 Vespa S 50 4V. We'll even throw in a copy of the Banken Gao Gao game just for kicks."

"I was so close..." Courtney pouted, her head pressed hard against the table.

"Congratulations, Tyler!" Chris continued. "But you might want to hold off on the victory celebration until later. Because we have one more challenge to run you kiddies through tonight." The contestants on stage all stopped whatever they were doing and looked at the handsome host with disbelief. Then they groaned upon realizing that he did say there would be two challenges.

"Crud!" Duncan grumbled. "I forgot all about that."

Here's the deal," Chris began to say as stage hands and ninja-clad interns removed everything used in the previous challenge and began setting up the next. "We're going to have ourselves a simple game of... Russian Roulette!"

"Oh no," Trent groaned. "Not another one."

"There will be some minor modifications," Chris said immediately. "First off, it's a different kind of Russian Roulette game. We're splitting you all off by gender. For each gender, there is a table covered with sushi. Ten different rolls of sushi, ten pieces of each roll. So a total of one hundred pieces of sushi."

"What's with the Japanese theme you've got running here?" Courtney asked curiously.

"When I was serving my suspension last week, I happen to have a gig going on in the land of the rising sun," Chris replied. "Saw a buncha things that inspired me, so I brought them over. Now, if I may continue. For each table, there are a select few pieces of sushi that have been laced with super hot wasabi. If you're one of the unfortunate people to bite into that, you are out. The game continues until all of the wasabi-laced pieces have been eaten. You'll all eat one piece at the same time so as to keep track of who has eaten how many should it get that deep into the game."

"I shudder to think what happens if we're out," Heather muttered aloud.

"I'll tell you about that in a minute," Chris said in response. "For now, just know that it will involve Alejandro and Sierra. Any way, I did mention earlier that the advantages and disadvantages earned last week would be applied to this challenge. Well, here's how they'll be used. Harold, Heather, Lindsay, and Owen. You guys don't have to compete." Harold, Heather, and Lindsay let out sighs of relief. Only Owen looked rather upset.

"But I wanted to eat some of the sushi," he whined.

"If there's any left over, big guy, you can down them all," Chris said. That instantly cheered Owen up, allowing the handsome host to continue. "Now then, the advantage for Harold and Heather is that they are automatically safe."

"Yes!" Harold cheered, pumping his fist. Heather had trouble containing the joy she had over the announcement.

"Which means Lindsay and Owen, I'm afraid, are automatically out since they had a disadvantage," Chris added. "Why don't you two head on over and give Alejandro and Sierra some company."

"O-M-G, that is, like, so cool Tyler got you such a beautiful dress, Lindsay," Sierra said as the two outed contestants joined her and Alejandro to one side of the stage. "You're gonna look so cute in it."

"I know, right," Lindsay responded, clearly unconcerned about what she was about to face since she was automatically out and was instead glowing about the result of the last challenge. "I can't wait to wear it for a special occasion."

"Hiya Al," Owen said to the restrained Alejandro. He failed to notice, or rather recognize, that Alejandro flinched when he called him Al. "I'm Owen. Nice to meet you."

"I know who you are, Owen," Alejandro said in a voice that was self-restrained for the annoyance he was feeling. "And I would very much appreciate it if you call me by my full first name, Alejandro."

"But that's so hard to remember," Owen said. "It's easier for me to say Al. I can remember Al and it's not a hard word for me to say. I hope you don't mind if I call you Al, do you Al?" Once again, Owen was not aware of how calling him Al made Alejandro feel very uncomfortable. To the point that a vein was being to form on his temple.

"How can I tell which sushi rolls are vegetable rolls?" Bridgette asked, carefully examining the one hundred pieces of sushi on the table set for the girls. "There's a lot that look the same, you know."

"There's a chart at the end of each table that lists and identifies the ten different rolls we're using," Chris answered. "Now then, let's set the record straight. Each table has four randomly chosen pieces of sushi laced with our super hot wasabi. Meaning four boys and four girls will be out. You will all take each bite at the same time so we can keep count of how many you've had. The game ends for each table when all pieces of wasabi-laced sushi have been eaten. You kiddies ready?" The contestants took their positions around their assigned tables. Each picked up a random piece of sushi, or in Bridgette's case a piece of one of the vegetable rolls, and begrudging let the handsome host know they were ready. "And eat!"

Chef blew a whistle and the eighteen contestants took their first bites. There was a hush in the audience as they awaited with anticipation to see who would be the first to have bitten into a wasabi-laced sushi. It was not long before that person was identified. After a slight flinch, Geoff spat the sushi he had in his mouth onto the floor and started screaming.

"Geoff is out!" Chris proclaimed. "He will be joining Lindsay and Owen."

"Dude!" Geoff managed to say after drenching his mouth with milk provided to him by Jessica. "What kinda harshness did you put in the wasabi, bra? I've never had wasabi like this." Chris said nothing and maintained a smile on his face in response.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - "If you must know, that's a very special super hot wasabi indeed. Because we mixed in one of the hottest naturally grown peppers known to man, the Bhut Jolokia chili pepper. Otherwise known as the ghost chili."

* * *

"One down, seven more to go," Chris announced. "Contestants ready?" The remaining seventeen reluctantly picked up their next random pieces of sushi. "Dig in!"

Chef blew the whistle again and the competitors took their bites. To the sudden surprise of everyone, Eva stopped chewing. Her eyes shot wide open as she began to bang the table a few times with her fist. Then she let out an exhale which saw smoke literally shooting out of her mouth. An obvious sign that her piece was laced with wasabi. But then it was discovered that she was not the only one as Tyler started to choke while tears were instantly streaming down his face.

"A double whammy!" Chris proclaimed. "Eva and Tyler are out!"

The two eliminated contestants made their way to join the other losers. Eva grumbled all the way while Tyler continued drink milk to ease the spiciness he was still feeling. Wanting to cheer Tyler up, Lindsay hopped over and gave him a kiss. Only the intensity in his mouth transferred over into hers and she started screaming in pain.

"Y'ouch," Chris commented. "I bet that smarts. Any way, so that's two boys and one down. We got two boys and three girls left to call out. Competitors in positions?" The fifteen sighed and picked up a random piece of sushi. "Go!"

Chef blew the whistle and the contestants took their bites. They continued eating until there was nothing left of the pieces they had picked up. It looked like that not one would be out in this round until they heard a mighty burp. This coming from Izzy. And when she burped, a blast of fire shot out of her mouth for a short second. Izzy merely giggled in response.

"I'm gonna assume that's one of the pieces that was laced in wasabi," Chris uttered aloud, looking to Chef and Jessica for confirmation. Chef shrugged, but Jessica nodded. "M'kay then. Izzy, you're out."

"Fun!" Izzy said rather happily as she skipped over to join the other losers. Still showing no sign of possibly having eaten something that was apparently as hot as the sushi piece she had eaten.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - "Wouldn't surprise me in the least if that girl was slightly immune to spicy stuff. That girl has done and been through strange thin's, ain't nothin' I can imagine she hasn't tried at least once."

Ezekiel - "Izzy didn't seemed all that w'ooried ab'oot havin' t'oo be 'oot, eh. I didn't like when I l'oost the last R'oossian R'oolette game, s'oo I'd be c'ooncerned ab'oot what Chris had in st'oore f'oor 'oos this time."

Izzy - /_Once again wearing a pirate uniform, has parrots Macadamia and Hornbeam on each shoulder._/ "Alonzo the Cruelty-Free Pirate and his gentle crew have just captured a fat merchant galleon loaded with environmentally friendly cargo. Alonzo stands on the quarterdeck, surveying his men as they break the merchant marines into small groups for short-term counseling. Alonzo reassures these poor souls in his kindest voice that they should not suffer any low self-esteem for having succumbed to his wily attack. Unlike less sensitive pirates, Alonzo does not force his captives to walk the plank. Instead he puts them in the galleon's lifeboats and points them to shore, while his first mate hands out sandwiches." /_Reveals a turkey sandwich in her hand and begins munching on it, then points out something unique about the sandwich._/ "But Alonzo the Cruelty-Free Pirate is no barbarian. He makes sure to trim the crusts first!" /_Cackles._/  
Macadamia - /_Squawks._/ "Short-term counseling."  
Hornbeam - /_Squawks._/ "Cruelty-Free."

* * *

"Four down, four more to go, people," Chris announced. In the meantime, the remaining fourteen picked up their random pieces of sushi, waiting for the word to start eating. "And... go!"

Chef blew the whistle and the contestants started to bite into their sushi. Almost immediately, Bridgette shot her eyes wide open and spat out the sushi had been eating. She started coughing before begging Jessica for some milk. Not long after, someone else was begging for milk to ease the tension in their mouth. That person was Cody.

"And they're falling like flies," Chris proclaimed with a chuckle. "Bridgette and Cody are out. Which means we got one more boy and one more girl to call out and this game of Russian Roulette will come to an end."

"Cody!" Sierra squealed with joy, managing to express her excitement despite being restrained. "We're finally gonna be together! This is the day I've been waiting for my whole life! I can hardly wait to be able to share it with you!"

Hearing Sierra speak made Cody realize why he dreaded being out in the first place. He immediately ducked behind Owen and dropped into a fetal position. Seeing all this, Beth looked gravely concerned and then became determined as she started examining the various pieces of sushi left on the table while the other remaining eleven merely picked up a random piece.

"Guess you kiddies want to get this over with," Chris noted with a chuckle. "Can't say I blame you. Ready? Eat!"

Chef blew the whistle once more and the competitors began to eat. After a short moment, Beth began to violently cough and then spit out the sushi that had been in her mouth. Just as she got a glass of milk to ease the the tension in her mouth, the last person necessarily to be out yelled out in pain. To the surprise of many, it was Duncan.

"What the hell did you put in here, lava?" Duncan cried as he desperately downed an entire glass of milk into his mouth.

"About as close to it as you can get naturally," Chris replied with a chuckle. "And with that, our challenge is finished. Beth, Bridgette, Cody, Duncan, Eva, Geoff, Izzy, and Tyler will join Alejandro, Lindsay, Owen, and Sierra for a very special loser's delight that will get your toes a tapping and your nose a running."

"I still get to eat the remaining sushi, right?" Owen asked.

"Go for it, big guy," Chris answered. "I don't think any one else will wanna eat it simply because they don't trust me enough to believe that there were only eight pieces laced with wasabi. Knock yourself out, Owen."

"Come to papa!" Owen cheered as he rushed over and scooped up all the remaining sushi into his arms, eating them in handfuls.

When Owen moved out of the way, Cody realized that he was now visible again to Sierra. With a slight squeak, he got up and tried to run after Owen only to bump into Beth. The two managed to keep their balance. Looking at each other, they shyly laughed in embarrassment and looked away from one another.

"So what's gonna happen to the losers?" Heather asked. She had her arms crossed, was glaring at Alejandro, and giving him a wicked grin as a means of telling him that he was about to be screwed. "Gonna put them through that off-campus challenge you did the last time we did a game like this?"

"Not exactly," Chris replied. He then turned to the twelve in the losing group. "Hope you kiddies didn't have anything planned for your two week break. Because you guys are going on a vacation." A great many in the amphitheater gasped in disbelief at what they just had heard. Did they hear Chris right when he said that these guys who were supposed to be losers were going on a vacation. "And it'll be a vacation of a lifetime because you kids are going... _BACK TO CAMP WAWANAKWA!_"

The audience exploded with cheers. Virtually all of the losers, even Alejandro and Sierra, looked utterly disheartened and in disbelief as to where they would be going. The only ones who did not seem to mind were Owen and Izzy, who actually appeared excited to be going back to the island. Before any one in the losing group could react any further, the stage hands and ninja-clad interns immediately appeared and pulled them off stage. No doubt getting ready to be shipped off to their horrific destination.

"That is just mean," Gwen commented.

"Yet you're probably feeling fortunate that you didn't lose," Chris noted. "Those who survived our lovely game of Russian Roulette will get to spend their two week break however they wish. The losers, on the other hand, will be experiencing déjà vu as they compete another series of challenges and perils for a cash reward. Ten of your favorite campers and two newbies are about to embark on a glorious... _RETURN TO TOTAL... DRAMA... ISLAND!_ Have fun with your two week break, kids!"

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Car Air Freshener hanging from Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with One Destroyed

* * *

Was going to update Redux next, but working on that Wiki of mine has gotten me to keep writing. That and I am just utterly hooked on the Japanese variety show _Downtown no Gaki no Tsukai ya Arahende!_, or _Downtown's "This is No Task for Kids!"_ It's been giving me a mess of ideas that I wanted to and ended up using for this story. First and foremost, it introduced me to Banken Gao Gao. It is an actual toy game and the most common name in English is Beware of the Dog. I plan on getting myself a copy of the game hopefully soon because it's so much fun to watch. You can see a sample of it being played on YouTube at watch ? v= zxlqvJhW0YY.

_Gaki no Tsukai_ was also the show responsible for introducing the chinko machine. Just simply type it into a search and see for yourself what an evil torture device it is. Chris using it on Alejandro I feel is within character because, to me, Chris would want to make Alejandro and Sierra suffer much more than the original twenty-two simply because these two had managed to pressure their way into a situation they did not deserve. So he was going to make them earn their place onto the show by amping up his deviousness on them. At least, that is the way I see it.

Now for the big one. I am trying to decide if I want to intercut scenes from _Return to Total Drama Island_ into the story or write it as a separate spin-off. Therefore, I need your help. I am going to put up a poll in my forum and my profile bio to see what you guys think. I will let you know when the poll will end, for sure it will be after the next chapter is posted, but I strongly recommend voting right now just so you will not put it off only for it to end when you least expect it to.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** The start of some much needed downtime for some


	30. Break Week 1, Part 1

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Thirty

_(Narrated by Chris McLean)_

Previously on Total Drama Academy...

While the lingering love gas used in the Heartbreak Hotel challenge made some couples a little frisky, all were anxiously anticipating the results of the double date prize. Seemed like Harold and LeShawna had a good time on their first official date as a couple. Heather and Ezekiel... let's just say they're not saying too much about what went down. Even moreso when pirated video of the affair was leaked to those talentless hacks at Celebrity Manhunt. This, along with a certain mega-fan wanting desperately to meet her favorite contestant, forced us behind-the-scenes to take some action.

As if the kiddies weren't already scrutinized enough, it was the last week of the first quarter and everyone was on edge. Heather was picked on by the fact that she went on a date with Ezekiel, Izzy was as crazy as ever impersonating her fellow classmates, and the trio of Gwen, Bridgette, and LeShawna gave themselves a name as a collective: the Sisterhood of Eternal Summer. I'm sure I could have come up with a better name, but if they wanna be the ones to give themselves some cheesy nickname, that's their problem.

Influenced by my recent trip to the Land of the Rising Sun, the final Challenge Night before break saw our students playing a wild game of Banken Gao Gao. Only they weren't alone as we threw in Alejandro and Sierra as punishment for their trouble-making. They wanna be on the show so bad, they'll have to be baptized in the fire, baby! In what could be considered an upset, Tyler managed to outlast Courtney and win himself a mess of prizes that included of Vespa.

But the fun was far from over as the contestants played a second game, this one being a Russian Roulette challenge with sushi. The unfortunate saps who ended up eating pieces laced with super hot wasabi mixed with ghost chili were in for a big surprise. And thus Beth, Bridgette, Cody, Duncan, Eva, Geoff, Izzy, and Tyler joined Lindsay, Owen, Alejandro, and Sierra as they will be making a fantastic and fun-filled... RETURN TO TOTAL... DRAMA... ISLAND!

Who will survive the second go-around at Camp Wawanakwa?

How will the lucky ones who get to stay behind spend their break?

What should I do with the unused footage of Ezekiel and Heather's date?

Let's see how many of the questions and many others will be answered in this edition of...

TOTAL... DRAMA... ACADEMY!

_(cue Theme Song)_

* * *

**(Break Week 1, Day 1 - Saturday)**

It was a generally accepted fact that teenagers do not wake up very often on Saturday mornings. They had just completed a week's worth of school and what better way to spend the weekend than to catch up on some much needed sleep. After all, there was hardly anything to do on a Saturday morning as it was. Barely anything of importance would ever be scheduled for a Saturday morning. What would be the point of losing any more hours of sleep just to wake up and do nothing for several hours.

In the case of Gwen and Trent, it was a chance to spend a lazy day together watching B-level horror movies. Found in Casa Loma, or rather the Riker Hall living space, slouching in one of the most comfortable couches known to man, half-snuggling up to one another with his arm around her shoulders, a bowl of popcorn rested between their lap, wearing their pajamas, and "Wrath of the River Snake III" playing on the massive widescreen television, neither one could really think of a better way to spend a Saturday morning, really.

"Okay, I think I'm missing something," Trent uttered before tossing a popcorn into his mouth. "How was it that the deputy managed to arrive from the other side of town so he could be decapitated?"

"There's no need to find any sort of logic in these films, babe," Gwen replied. She herself tossing a popcorn into her mouth. "As I've told you before, the only thing to enjoy out of these movies are the cheesy special effects and to watch people like the dearly departed deputy eat it."

"I know, I know," Trent said with a chuckle. "I just feel like I would be enjoying this just a little more if there was at least some hint of intelligence on display."

"Think about it this way," Gwen began to suggest. "These flicks are trying to achieve the same level of entertainment value as any Michael Bay movie. Logic need not apply so long as you are in awe of the pretty pictures assaulting your senses in an aggressive manner."

"Well, that's certainly one way of describing such films, beautiful," Trent noted. He let out another chuckle before gently squeezing the goth girl wrapped in his arm.

"It's all about how to get your words to register with the listener, handsome," Gwen stated, letting out a light laugh of her own that followed with a soft, loving sigh as they returned to watching the movie being screened. Their moment of bliss, however, would be short-lived.

"I could never understand how people can watch these movies," a voice spoke from behind the couch. Gwen and Trent turned their heads enough to catch sight of Courtney standing there with her pet raccoon Brittany in her arms. "They are so vile and poorly made. How on Earth Duncan imagines they make great films to watch on a date is something I just cannot fathom."

"It's the perfect set up, really," Gwen started to explain. "Most girls get frightened by what they see, regardless of how tenth-rate they look. And when the girls are frightened, they instinctively wrapped their arms on the nearest thing they believe will shield them from such terror, in this case their boyfriends. Boys like it because they enjoy these types of films in general and it offers them the opportunity of getting lucky with their girlfriends. Cheap thrills equal win-win for the guys."

"So how is it that you're able to stomach these movies like a guy?" Courtney asked curiously.

"I try not to act like a girl," Gwen replied with a laugh.

"Very funny," Courtney said, rolling her eyes with a slight bit of annoyance. She let out a sigh before she spoke again. "Well, you two enjoy not-acting like girls and watch these poor excuses for entertainment. If any one asks, Janet wants to meet with the Student Council Representatives of our class today. I am not sure how long this meeting will take, so I will likely be gone for the majority of the day."

"And you're taking your pet raccoon?" Trent questioned with a curious brow raised.

"I'm not leaving Brittany alone on a Saturday," Courtney proclaimed. "It's hard enough getting her to refrain from making a mess while school is in session. Letting her be on the weekends would be asking for trouble. Unfortunately, Duncan and Bridgette are both being forced to return to that dreadful island, so there's really no one else I can trust to watch over her while I'm away." The raccoon flicked her tail randomly.

"Okay, that we got," Gwen said. "But when exactly did we become your messaging service all of a sudden?"

"I would imagine you of all people would be of the same line of thinking," Courtney stated. "We may be on a two week break and we may have managed to escape going back to that awful camp, but I seriously doubt Chris is just going to allow us to enjoy ourselves during this time as opposed to torturing us in some manner. In case the inevitable should happen while I am away, you can tell him where I am and its importance to my education, since that is one of the things that prevents him from getting to us freely."

"That is a good point," Trent noted. "It would be unlike Chris to allow us any sort of relaxation while we're still under contract."

"Remind me to keep skimming through our contracts so I can find some more loopholes to use against him," Gwen muttered under her breath.

"So now you know where I'm going to be and why I've told you," Courtney declared before departing with Brittany in tow.

"All of a sudden, I don't feel so good at the moment," Gwen stated with a huff. "I'm clearly not comfortable being here just waiting for Chris to do something to us."

"Okay, so we get cleaned up and head out," Trent suggested. "Where do you wanna go?"

"I dunno," Gwen replied with a shrug. "I hardly know what's around town. Even though we've already had two dinner dates out there."

"Well, there you go," Trent proclaimed. "What better way to keep ourselves out of harm's way than to spend a whole day out on the town. Checking out what they've got. I mean, we still have to plan a place for our planned double date with Harold and LeShawna."

"Awww, Trent," Gwen said, acting like a girly-girl in a mocking manner. "You sure know out to treat a girl right." After a slight giggle, she return to her usual self. "That's actually not a bad idea, sweetie. Perhaps we should get Harold and LeShawna to tag along any way so that we won't have to leave them to suffer whatever wrath Chris may attempt to rain down upon us."

"Sounds like we have a plan," Trent stated. "So should we get moving."

"In a minute," Gwen answered, turning her attention back to the movie. "One of my favorite death scenes in coming up. I use it for inspiration whenever I think of ways to finally decide to murder Heather."

"I imagine the river snake bites off the face of the bitchy woman in this," Trent hypothesized aloud.

"Oh, it does more than that, I assure you," Gwen responded with a giant grin forming on her lips.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_Reads from paper._/ "'For legal reasons, we are unable to show you any actual scenes from 'Wrath of the River Snake III' as it is not suitable for family viewing. It contains scenes of violence involving people's heads and arms getting chopped off, their ears nailed to trees, and their toenails pulled out in slow-motion.'" /_Looks up from paper with smirk on his face._/ "There are also scenes of naked women with floppy breasts. And also at one point you can see a pair of buttocks. And there's another bit where I swear you could see everything, but my friend says it's just the way he's holding the spear." /_Clears throat._/ "Any way, it's too bad because that death scene Gwen talked about is killer."

Trent - "I don't really watch horror movies. Not my kind of thing. But since I'm going out with Gwen, I figured I should at least familiarize myself with the genre so that I won't feel left out or stupid whenever she engages the subject in any conversation either with me or with someone while I'm around."

Gwen - "It is flattering that Trent is willing to subject himself to terrible horror movies just so he'll have some kind of voice any time I may end up going on about it during chit-chat. In all honesty, he doesn't really need to do that. He doesn't need to be that knowledgeable on the subject just for my sake. Him being him is all I need to be happy with him."

Jessica - "Since Chris seems less interested in admitting it on camera, I might as well be the one to inform everyone that he is not allowed to pull something on the students during their two week break. Part of the reason has to do with his overspending on the Twenty-Four Hour Off-Campus Challenge, another is that the budget to be used for the two weeks is already being poured into the challenges that are being done back on Camp Wawanakwa. But really, and this is the part where he won't admit it, but he felt the boys and girls deserved the break given all the drama that occurred over the last nine weeks. Kind of like a reward for providing quality entertainment, as it were."

* * *

The Study Garden of Richmore Academy was a small patch of land reserved for students to study under peaceful conditions. Located near the school's training facility, it was chosen for its more ecologically friendly setting. For the most part, students would be too caught up in the majestic setting of nature to study and would instead interact with the local wildlife such as rabbits and deer. Those who did actually study at the Study Garden found themselves in such relaxation that they would often forget about the stress of their academics and literally flow through their work in an enlightening manner.

Such an ideal setting was what made it the primary location for Janet, Courtney, and Chelsea to have their meeting. Although and hour into the so-called meeting showed that it would take a good long while before they actually got started into discussing anything related to student government. It was also a long enough time for Courtney to start questioning whether or not it was a good idea to bring her pet raccoon Brittany as it would be seen that Janet was more engrossed with cooing over the animal than anything else.

"You are such a cutie!" Janet squealed, cradling the raccoon in one arm and using the index finger from her other arm to tickle the animal's tummy. Brittany playfully squirmed at the attention and affection she was receiving. "Yes you are! Yes you are! Such a sweet lil' Brittany!"

"You just had to bring your pest with you," Chelsea grumbled quietly to Courtney. She had her arms crossed over her chest and looked to be far from pleased with the way the day was going, having to come all the way out for a meeting only to have spent the last hour witnessing her class Vice President gushing over a furry critter.

"I'd like to see you try to raise a raccoon as a pet," Courtney responded back sternly.

"Why should I?" Chelsea questioned in return. "They're filthy, disease-ridden vermin that should disallowed from being anywhere near the campus."

"Brittany has received her shots, thank you for asking," Courtney stated, shooting a hard glare at the same time. "Insensitive to animals and nature. It's no wonder you never really had a shot at being elected Vice President and had to instead settle on being a Student Council Representative from the start."

"Oh, like you had any chance either," Chelsea noted. "Everyone and their grandmother knew no one could beat Janet with the way she naturally draws people. If I recall, you're the one who got lucky in making it as a Student Council Representative. I understand a certain dweeb would have buried you in the polls had a most unfortunate situation not arose."

"It is almost as though you know more about this unfortunate situation that befell Harold than everyone else," Courtney said with a curious brow raised. "Something you wish to share?"

"Oh, trying to be all high and mighty with morality?" Chelsea questioned with a retort. "If you really felt as bad about beating the dweeb as you claim to make yourself out to be you would have surrendered your spot on the Student Council to him."

"I'm sure you would love for me to do that," Courtney responded sarcastically.

"Who's the sweetest lil' thing?" Janet asked, continuing to baby Brittany with no regard to what was happening around her. So long as Brittany continued to absorb all of the affection she was receiving. "Who's the sweetest? You are! You're just the sweetest!"

While Courtney and Chelsea continued to wait until Janet finally got their supposed meeting underway, neither were aware that they were being viewed from a distance. Or rather Janet was being viewed from a distance. Justin, male model hunk and the dream of any being that was female, was perched on a bench and watching the blue-haired girl through a pair of binoculars. Perched in the sense that he holding his upper body weight on one elbow and his legs were laid out on the bench as though he was posing for one of his shoots. The sight of Justin being present at all would normally send girls in such a love-struck fever that they would faint in an instant. That did not necessarily happen to one particular female who caught sight of him.

"You, of all people, would be the last person I would expect to be some kinda bird-watcher," she stated. The male model looked over briefly to catch sight of Heather, her arms crossed over her chest and a curious brow raised as she shifted her weight to one side.

"It's not just any bird that I am watching," Justin responded as he turned his attention back to what he had been doing previously.

Heather rolled her eyes, knowing full well just which girl the male model was smitten with. She saw for herself how virtually every male were charmed with the unusually dressed girl the same way girls were charmed with him. She never understood how such an oddity like Janet was able to do such a thing, but thought little of it as she had yet to see how it concerned her.

"Of all the girls you could take your pick from and you choose a girl who paints her nails yellow?" Heather questioned in a condescending manner.

"I see jealousy continues to be the dominant trait of you females," Justin noted aloud.

"Me?" Heather asked in a mocking manner. "Jealous of her?"

"How could you not?" Justin questioned back in response. "She's so beautiful that she makes a glorious sunset look like a big fat turd."

Heather was actually quite taken aback with out dumbfounded she was in her response to his comment. It was one thing to know that there were handsome men who generally had no clue how to be romantic. But Justin proved that there was indeed a species of men who, despite their magnificent beauty, made pigs seem like better lovers than Casanova.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Justin - "People think I don't know a thing or two about how to properly woo a girl just because I could charm any female with my good looks. That's only part of the equation as I have been known for being quite the ideal date in my time. Though for a delicate flower like Janet, only the best would suffice. She's the only kind of person I would allow to warm her freezing hands inside my butt-crack."

Heather - "My opinion on the opposite sex has progressively gotten worse and worse. Since coming to this school, it has not gotten any better. It's like I'm fated to only know the worst kind of males in existence. I have to deal with a delinquent like Duncan, an egotistical lunatic like Chris, a sexist prairie boy like Ezekiel, and a smug rat like Alejandro. Trying to gain his own fifteen minutes of fame at my expense by trying to further damage my reputation. He won't even last fifteen seconds after I'm done with his well-tanned, hot Latin behind." /_Pauses and realizes what she just said in horror._/ "Don't you dare take my words out of context! I'm will swallow him whole!" /_Once again realizes in shock what she just said._/ "Goddammit! I didn't mean it like that!"

Courtney - /_Holds Brittany in arms._/ "Five hours! That's how long it took before Janet finally started our meeting. That's how long she spent babying Brittany. Although the meeting turned out to be quite insightful, with Janet making these great points like how, despite the recent intrusions onto the campus that have occurred, that it we should be cautious in developing improvement to the school's security measures." /_As Courtney talks, Brittany sniffs out another random pink plushie, picks one up, and proceeds to rip its head off._/ "It's like beneath all this shyness and… unique personality, there's a mind for politics that is quite impressive. It makes me wonder why she does not express it more often, most especially now that she is Vice President." /_Is seemingly oblivious when Brittany successfully rips head off pink plushie, causing cotton to scatter about._/

* * *

Gwen and Trent's plan for spending a whole day out on the town with Harold and LeShawna quickly expanded into one giant group of bodies hanging out with them. Being LeShawna's roommate, Katie overheard the idea and immediately begged for her and Noah to tag along. The others relented, but then Katie added that she also wanted to bring Sadie. Again they relented, then Katie did not want Sadie to feel like a third-wheel and see if there was someone else they could get to tag along. Given their limited options, Gwen and Harold finally decided to convince Ezekiel to join the group. The way they looked at it, it would help him gain more insight of the outside world and they could pass off to Izzy that they "attempted" to hook the prairie boy up with a girl while she was away.

While Gwen, Trent, Harold, and LeShawna were actively checking out various restaurants so as to choose a place for their double date, much of the time was spent in the shops. Katie and Sadie gushed over a great number of locally made merchandise only to stop short of buying them when Noah would constantly remind them of their lack of funds to make such purchases. All eight were occasionally stopped by fans for pictures of autographs, an act that Ezekiel was very much not familiar with and was thus left feeling quite uncomfortable at the attention he was receiving. A number of female fans often requested Gwen and Trent to kiss, though the couple politely turned them down by saying that they only displayed affection in private.

As the sun started setting in the west, the group decided to stick around and see what kind of nightlife the city had. As eateries began to fill up with customers and couples out on dates, the group managed to catch sight of a nightclub. Near the front door, it was advertising that a battle of the bands would be taking place shortly. Feeling as though there was nothing else that was important for them to otherwise do, they went in and seated themselves at tables up on the inside balcony, which provided a good view of the stage.

"This ought to be good," Gwen said in a teasing manner. "Looking to see how you compare with the local competition, eh handsome?"

"Oh, come on, beautiful," Trent responded with a chuckle and a light wave of his hand. "You know I've never really been part of a band officially. Just filled in whenever they needed someone to pay guitar here and there."

"Surprisin' considering' just how good you are, Music Man," LeShawna commented.

"I've told you guys a hundred times, my passion is motorcycles," Trent stated. "I just happen to have what my mom calls a natural gift for music."

"And so that you won't let your mom down by letting it waste, you bring that guitar of yours everywhere you go," Gwen said, repeating what her boyfriend would have eventually said. "We got it, Trent. Just know that we wouldn't be surprised in the least if you end up being making a hit record within five years."

"Ohmygosh, this is, like, gonna be so cool!" Sadie exclaimed with excitement. "I, like, so never been to a live music show before!"

"I know, right?" Katie responded with equal enthusiasm. "We so could, like, never afford tickets to concerts we've, like, so always wanted to go to. But we, like, needed to pool our money together so that we could, like, start our own fashion agency. Sadie is, like, gonna look so cool wearing my clothes when she's, like, walking down the runway."

"How much money have you guys saved up so far?" Harold asked curiously.

"You won't believe it," Noah replied.

"He didn't ask you, Egghead," LeShawna stated. Noah simply ignored the way she had spoken to him. "You girls were saying'."

"Two hundred and fifty-three million dollars!" Katie and Sadie proclaimed together happily. This caused virtually everyone else within group to spit out the drinks they had started sipping in shock. Aside from the would-be twins, Noah was the only other one who did not spit out his drink, instead drinking it casually.

"You two have $253 million?" Harold asked, wondering if what he had heard was correct.

"You'd be surprised just how lucrative the ice cream stand business can be over the summer if you know where the hot spots for selling them are," Noah pointed out in a nonchalant manner.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Chris - /_In shock._/ "$253 million?" /_Pauses and blinks._/ "… Well… I guess they're not as idiotic as they make themselves out to be…"

Chef - /_In disbelief._/ "$253 million? From sellin' ice cream? … I gotta get the recipe!"

Noah - "Was I surprised when Katie told me that she and Sadie have saved up $253 million thus far from selling ice cream? Absolutely. But I was more surprised by the fact that they've been able to keep themselves from spending even a penny of that money, thereby staying true to their goal of using it towards launching their fashion agency. If they can maintain this same sense of self-control and patience with their finances when they do open up their agency, then there's a good chance they'll never have to be worried about money problems because they'll have more than enough tucked away to live the rest of their lives in relative comfort. Just another reason why my affections for Katie are honest and true. She knows how to manage a budget."

* * *

"S'oo w'oot's a battle 'ooh the bands, eh?" Ezekiel asked curiously once everyone and everything had calmed. "Are we g'oona see fightin'?"

"It's a competition where a bunch of locally put-together bands play music and the audience decides which one they like the best," Noah answered. "The real question you should be asking is if we'll be lucky enough to find a diamond in the rough amongst these out-of-sync musicians."

"According to the flyer, the winning band gets $500 and a spot in the next competition at the Rockit," Harold said, reading from the flyer he mentioned. The mere mention of money made most within the group to look at Katie and Sadie, both of whom taking no notice of the slight attention they were receiving briefly as the first band was about to play.

"Okay, the first band is from Brampton," the announcer said in a matter-of-fact manner. "And they are… Crash and the Boys." One or two people applauded rather mildly as two barely out of their teenage boys and an Asian girl who had not even reached her teens yet started setting up on stage.

"So what do you think, Zeke?" Noah asked. "Do they rock or suck?"

"They…" Ezekiel started to say, feeling quite bewildered not only at being talked to, but by the question Noah was asking him. "They haven't started plain' yet."

"That was a test, Zeke," Noah proclaimed with a slight smirk on his face. "You passed."

"No-ah!" Katie said firmly, giving him a gentle slap on the shoulder. "Behave yourself."

"Yes, dear," Noah replied. Being called "Dear" by Noah made Katie swoon.

"Good evening," the lead singer of the band said through the microphone. He spoke with a mixture of boredom and depression in his voice. "My name is Crash. These are the Boys."

"Is that girl a boy, too?" Noah called out to the band.

"Yes," Crash replied. He still spoke in what was apparently his normal voice, but there seemed to be a hint of contained rage to go along with the death glare he shot. The Asian girl took it further by flipping Noah the bird aggressively, which caused Katie and Sadie to gasp in horror. Gwen was finding the whole thing rather amusing. "This song is called 'I Am So Sad, I Am So Very Very Sad.' Goes a little something like this."

The drummer banged on the cymbal to set the proper rhythm and then the band started to play.

_"Sooo…  
Sad!"_

Everyone blinked and it was over. A feather that had been dropped was not even close to reaching the ground. No one in the venue knew what to make of what just happened.

"It can't be…" LeShawna uttered, a perplexed brow raised as she stared at the band on the stage. "That song was…"

"0.4 seconds long?" Harold stated in questioning disbelief as he looked at his watch.

"Thank you," Crash said, apparently not caring how the audience really reacted to the song.

"It's not a race, guys!" Noah called out to the band.

"Alright, this next song goes out to the guy who keeps yelling from the balcony," Crash announced, once again shooting Noah a death glare. Noah mockingly pointed to himself in response to being called out by the band's lead singer. "It's called 'We Hate You, Please Die.'"

"Sweet," Noah stated with a proud smug on his face. "Love his one."

While Noah was taking great pleasure in jabbing at the band whenever the opportunity arose, everyone else was experiencing incredible discomfort with the music they were listening to. Rather, it did not really sound like music to them. They were not even sure if it could properly be described or labeled as music. It was some form of noise. Noise that was far from pleasant.

"This song is weird…" Sadie said, sounding as though she might be complaining.

"The rhythm…" Katie added, also in a tone that made it seem like she was complaining. "It's so… wrong."

"Trent, you need to form a band," Gwen proclaimed. "There is no way we're lasting two years going to clubs if this is the kind of crap we will be expected to listen to."

"I'm starting to come around to your line of reasoning, babe," Trent responded. "Only how am I going to put a band together when I barely know any one around here who can play music? And you know I don't like the idea of having to hold auditions."

"I could play keyboards," Harold stated. "Most bands nowadays generally have someone playing keyboards to add a soothing melody."

"He's is a good keyboard playa, guys," LeShawna noted. "And I'm not just sayin' that cause he's my suga."

"And you know I'm good on the drums," Gwen said. "So we got you on guitar, me on drums, Harold on keyboard. We need someone on bass and decide if we need a separate vocalist or not. We've already got some not too shabby singers in the three of us as it is."

"This song is called 'Zog,'" Crash announced as he and the Boys were about to play their next perplexing song.

"So just a bassist and an optional extra body to possibly serve as singer if need be," LeShawna summarized as noise sounded from the stage. "And what kinda music is it that you guys plan on playin'?"

"Whatever it is, it will certainly be a lot better than the noise that's going on right now," Gwen replied at first.

"I think that's something we're going to have to figure out as we start playing together," Trent properly answered. "I'm able to switch genres on a dime, but whoever we add to the group might not be able to do the same depending upon their abilities."

"It is kind of funny, really," Harold stated with a chuckle. "We are putting together a band simply because of how terrible the band that is playing right now is."

"Crazier things have been done for most obscure reasons," Gwen noted with a shrug. "At least we're doing what we're doing because we want to be able to listen to good music for the next two years."

"This song is called 'Last Song Kills Audience,'" Crash announced once more. "And it'll be our last song tonight… for you all."

"Peace," the other male member of the band said in a very quiet, monotone voice.

"D'oo they serve f'ood 'ere?" Ezekiel asked curiously. "I'm gettin' 'oongry, eh."

"Yeah, me too," Sadie said in a bit of a whining voice.

"I'm not as parched, but I could do with something edible to put in my stomach," Noah noted.

"We should probably bail," Gwen suggested. "I don't this place will have anything for us to eat. And if they did, I doubt it would be of acceptable quality. Look at the bands they allow to play here."

"Works for me," LeShawna stated. "Let's book before anything else happens that might further cause my faith in humanity to sink any lower."

_"Baby I was born to destroy you!"_

All eight got up for their seats and were about to start leaving. Their intention was to merely glance over at the scene they were about to leave. One look was all it took to cause them to freeze i place and look in horror. By apparently not paying any further attention to the last song that was played, they were spared the fate that befell everyone else in the venue.

"Oh… my… god!" Katie whispered in a gasp.

"What the…" Gwen managed to utter before her voice trailed off.

"What… happened?" Trent asked aloud.

Unless their eyes were deceiving them, the last song played by Crash and the Boys was so perplexing that it managed to knock everyone unfortunate enough to listen unconscious. Thereby creating what appeared to be an entire floor covered in motionless bodies, as though they had all just been massacred by what they had heard.

"I d'oon't get it, eh," Ezekiel said, scratching the top of his toque-covered head.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

LeShawna - /_Still in disbelief._/ "That was just… wow. That's a whole new level of insanity right there."

Gwen - "I don't know what is crazier. The fact that it happened or that I feel glad I got the opportunity to see it."

Trent - "I think it's pretty safe to say that whatever band Gwen and I put together will definitely be better than these guys. Who in their right mind manages to come up with a song that knocks out the audience for bout twenty-to-thirty minutes?"

Harold - "That is actually intimidating, when you think about it. If they're the opening act, how in the world is any one supposed to successfully follow them?"

Chris - /_Rubs chin._/ "Hmmm… You know what, Harold… I think you just may have given me a great idea for a future challenge." /_Chuckles in a sinister manner._/

* * *

_Dear Momma,_

_Your little Poopydoo is doing alright at Richmore Academy. You will be happy to know that I have not gotten into any real trouble. It has been quite a change from the school back home to the kind that I will be learning at for the next two years. They say that by having attended this school it will provide me with a chance to really be whatever I want to be._

_There is something that has happened since coming here that I would like to let you know. I met a very pretty girl name Janet. She is a really nice and kind person. She was also just elected as Vice President of the Student Council. I hope you don't mind if I ask her out and perhaps be her boyfriend by the time you read this. I think you will like her if you get the chance to meet her._

_Bunny says, "Hi!" And we miss you everyday. Hope everyone is doing okay back home. Let them know I'm doing fine and I will probably see you all during Christmas break._

_Love,  
DJ_

After putting the finishing touches to the letter, DJ carefully folded it up and placed it gently into the envelope. Licking the adhesive, he closed the envelope good and tight. He then looked around his desk for a stamp, but found that there was none. He got up and proceeded to leave his room, intent on looking for a stamp.

He had just reached the door when something caught his eye, causing him to stop dead in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder, wanting to make sure that what he was seeing was indeed what he was seeing. Still in a bit of disbelief, he then turned and slowly made his way over to where Justin's bed was. The male model was absent this evening for whatever reason, DJ never bothered to know or even ask. He continued to step closer and closer to Justin's bed, seeing something that hung above it to one side that had captured his attention. It was not until his nose was literally within inches of touching it that he truly believed that what he was seeing was indeed what he was seeing and not some visual aberration.

For what he was saw was that Justin, his roommate, had a picture of Janet hanging over his bed.

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Car Air Freshener hanging from Electric Fish on top of Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Toronto Maple Leafs Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with Two Destroyed

* * *

Sure has been a while since I last updated this story. Sorry about that. A lot of things have been going on personally and it left me with little time to actually write this chapter. It didn't help one bit that the pesky plot bunnies started nibbling on my brain, along with a need to finish up on some other stories that I had been neglecting. It wasn't until maybe a few weeks ago after **Total Drama: Revenge of the Island** started airing that I finally got around to writing this sucker. Hopefully this long delay won't happen again.

One of the things I realized right off the bat when I was getting back into writing this was that I never really had some sort of idea of what the major storyline of the second quarter was going to be. I guess maybe I felt something would develop once I got to working on **Return to Total Drama Island**, which by the way I have decided will be a spin-off story due to the votes on the poll and the fact that I'm already running well behind where I believe I should be in writing these stories. Those who voted, thank you for doing so as it really helped in deciding how exactly I would be able to map everything out. And I'm rather glad you guys chose to make it a spin-off because there are a number of ideas that I plan to use that would really just be too much to be contained within the short amount of chapters I plan to write for the two week break period the students are on. Any way, I'm hope having written this chapter will get the ball rolling on what could be some major events going into the second quarter.

While it did take me a while to finally get this new chapter up, I must say that it will be some time before the next chapter is up as I've got a couple other stories I need to update and I need to get started on **Return to Total Drama Island**. Hopefully it won't be too long of a delay because I'm liking the new characters introduced in **Total Drama: Revenge of the Island** and I can't wait to add them to this story, which won't happen until maybe **Year Two** at best.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** The Times They Are A-Changin'


	31. Break Week 1, Part 2

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Thirty-One

**(Break Week 1, Day 2 - Sunday)**

It seemed to Courtney that at least one person was occupying Casa Loma at all times. There was hardly a moment where it appeared devoid of a human body present. And why not? It truly was paradise on Earth. Just about anything anyone could ever hope to want or need in life was right there. It would require a truly important reason to ever want to leave such a majestic place. So it was no surprise to her that there was someone there when she emerged from her room to take Brittany out for some fresh air. As it turned out, there were two people occupying Casa Loma. Two she really did not expect to see.

"You sure your mom will be alright with it?" Jessica asked with a curious brow raised. She was seated on one of the extremely comfortable couches in the Riker Hall living space. "I seem to recall last time that she was none too pleased when you made mention of you and me spending a week at her summer house alone."

"Alone being the key emphasis in that regard," Jackson replied with a chuckle. He was seated next to Jessica with an arm loosely draped around her shoulders. Both were paying little attention to whatever it was that was being screened on the 80-inch television. "This time around, we're just going to be with your folks. I'm sure she won't have a problem with that."

"Need I remind you that my dad has been armed with a shotgun in hand ever since the end of freshman year," Jessica noted, though a sly grin seemed to be forming on her lips. "But more importantly, are you really sure you want to spend the holidays away from your folks? Isn't the whole idea of the holidays is to be with loved ones?"

"I thought that's what I was trying to do," Jackson responded, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek.

Courtney could see that Jessica did not blush, but she was quite certain that her resident assistant appeared flattered by the comment he had just made. Almost immediately, the CIT started to feel somber. Duncan was not going to be around for at least another two weeks, having been shipped off forcefully to spend the two week break at that hell-hole Camp Wawanakwa. Though she had been lost in her thoughts for only a brief second, it was long enough for her presence to be recognized by the others.

"Out and about with your pet raccoon, I see," Jessica said to her.

"Hmm?" Courtney managed to utter, having been reared back to reality. "Oh. Yes, I'm taking Brittany out for a bit. She doesn't like being cooped up in her cage for a long while."

"I can imagine," Jackson said.

If anything more was going to be said about the subject, it never happened. Muffled music was suddenly heard, perking Courtney's interest. It seemed to also appeal to Brittany as well as she felt her pet cock her head in the direction of the sound and swished her tail instinctively. If she didn't know any better, Courtney was pretty sure it was coming from the Marshmallow.

"Something going on in there?" she asked aloud curiously.

"That would be the new band trying to get some practice in despite lacking a bassist," Jessica answered.

"New band?" Courtney questioned further.

"Trent, Gwen, and Harold," Jessica replied. "Apparently they decided to put one together after checking out some of the local talent. They've been at it pretty much ever since they came back last night, trying to get a feel for playing together."

"How come this is the first I've heard them play, though?" Courtney asked some more.

"I mentioned they lacked a bassist, didn't I?" Jessica answered in amusement. "Trent is on guitar, Gwen on drums, Harold on keyboards. But as you might be able to tell, the music isn't working without bass. Trent stops play before any song could really kick in. Quite the perfectionist in that regard, really."

Curiosity getting the best of her, Courtney decided to see for herself this trio of musicians trying to play together. Upon entering the Marshmallow, they had started up again. Trent, sitting on a stool, was strumming at his guitar and yet was still able to hit the tone just right. Gwen was banging the beats with a steady flow. Harold creating a sweet melody that was in sync with the others. Jessica had been right though about the lack of bass. Without it, the music just did not come together. A fact that clearly Trent was well aware of it himself as it appeared that he wasn't quite into the music as he could have been.

"Stop," he uttered, waving his hand to get the attention the other two. When the music stopped, he merely shook his head. "Even if we stick to emulating White Stripes, this isn't going to work." He let out a frustrated groan, clutching his hair from either side of his head, and mimicked pulling them tight.

"I know you don't like the idea, babe, but we really need to consider auditions," Gwen stated after letting out a tired sigh. One could easily see just how tired she was, given that she had been playing the drums all night without any rest.

"Maybe if I can tweak the keyboard a bit, I can tune it to sound like a bass," Harold suggested.

"Didn't we try that a minute ago?" Gwen asked, rubbing her eyes.

"Oh yeah," Harold muttered in realization. "It did not sound all that good."

"Lookin' for somethin', Courtney?" a voice suddenly asked from behind Courtney. It startled her for a brief second, nearly squeezing Brittany into being startled herself. She then turned to see LeShawna sitting in a seat that was as far to the back of the amphitheater as possible. She had a peculiar brow raised as she looked at the CIT.

"Oh," Courtney managed to utter before clearing her throat nervously. "I just, um... heard some music going on in here."

"Did we wake you or something?" Gwen asked. The three on stage appeared to have suddenly registered Courtney's appearance in the room when LeShawna spoke up.

"Actually, I didn't know you guys were playing music last night," Courtney replied.

"Is it morning already?" Harold questioned, aghast at the thought that he had been up all night.

"Well, it's really almost noon," Courtney proclaimed. Trent and Gwen groaned, rubbing their eyes some more as they took in the news of just how long they had been at it. Harold was still in a state of shock that he had been awake this whole time.

"Good thing it's just the weekend," Trent muttered.

"Good thing we're still only a day or two into a two week break," Gwen pointed out with a sigh. "There's no way I would have been able to function for class lacking proper sleep."

"So that is why I feel like my mojo is slipping out of my body," Harold stated, on the verge of collapsing atop the keyboard.

"Why don't you guys just call it a day and then try again later to see what more you can do," LeShawna suggested, herself letting out a light yawn. It seemed that she had not slept at all during the night either.

"Knowing now how long we've been at it, that's probably not a bad idea," Trent said in agreement. "I could certainly use some shut eye, a shower, and something to eat."

"Can I join your band?" Courtney asked suddenly and rather sheepishly. This caught the others completely off guard as they all looked at her with a mixture of shock and disbelief.

"Did you just ask if you could join our band?" Gwen questioned, wanting to make sure she heard the CIT correctly and wasn't under the influence of an improperly functioning brain.

"I may not be able to play bass, but the violin can sound similar to one," Courtney noted, as if she needed to make a case for why she should join them in the first place. "And I can play rhythm guitar should you need the extra sound."

The others, specifically the three on stage, examined her as closely as they could. Trying to tell if she was being serious about joining the band. She and Harold might have a truce with one another, but that still did not necessary make them any less uncomfortable when they were together. After a moment of simply staring at her, they finally managed to glance over at each other.

"And you want to join our band because..." Gwen started to say, leaving it open for Courtney to finish.

"Well..." Courtney began to say for hesitating to say further. After biting her bottom lip briefly, she continued. "Mainly it's because I'm required to be doing some sort of extracurricular activity as a Student Council Representative. One that isn't backed or sponsored by the school."

"Doesn't our being on this show count towards that?" Trent asked curiously.

"Apparently not," Courtney answered. "All I know is that I need to do something aside from just being on the show. And I would really like to play the violin with a band if I can."

The three on stage stared at her once again, still trying to figure if she really wanted to be part of their band. They then looked to one another. As tired as they were, they still managed to get their brains to function long enough to put some serious thought into whether or not to let Courtney join. Finally, they all appeared to come to some sort of agreement as they shrugged together before turning back to face her.

"We'll let you know when we'll be practicing next," Trent said.

* * *

**(Confessional Cam)**

Gwen - "So this band of ours currently has myself, Trent, Harold, and now Courtney. How the hell did that happen?"

Trent - "We're still going to need a bassist. But I don't think it would hurt having an extra guitar on hand."

LeShawna - "As long as Ms. CIT not start blamin' my man again if thin's don't go to her likin', I guess I could live."

Harold - "She mentioned wanting to really play the violin in a band. I cannot recall too many bands that have violinists that are not symphonies."

Courtney - /_Holds Brittany who is eying electric fish dangling on Z Necklace._/ "Alright, now I'm covered with the extracurricular activity problem. I probably would have gone to Noah for some advice, given he is supposed to be my chief of staff." /_Brittany claws at electric fish._/ "Fortunately, Gwen, Trent, and Harold were starting a band and they agreed to let me join. Maybe this will help in continuing to ease the tension Harold and I had. I mean, it's like the old saying. Music can sooth a savage beast. So with that kind of thinking, Harold and I would be able to relax and actually get along for a change." /_Brittany snags electric fish and begins tearing into it with mouth._/ "Hopefully Duncan won't mind that I'm in a band. More importantly, in a band with Harold. He still doesn't like the truce I called, but Noah and I have been able to keep him in check." /_Sighs longingly._/ "Oh, how I miss Duncan..." /_Brittany rips electric fish in half._/

* * *

**(Break Week 1, Day 3 - Monday)**

"Beta Gamma Pi, eh?" Noah muttered with a curious brow raised. He began to skim through the information packet that Katie and Sadie had presented to him while they were having lunch in the cafeteria. Though Casa Loma was stocked with food, neither one of them felt like cooking at the moment. "Patience, valor, diligence, liberty, generosity, kindness, and humility. You sure you two would be up for joining a sorority? Particularly in a place like this where academics is of the highest order?"

"Owen, like, joined a fraternity," Sadie pointed out.

"Being a member of Delta Tau Chi isn't necessarily something that would look impressive on a resume," Noah noted. "Not even for a job flipping burgers at a fast food joint. This, on the other hand, is different."

"Oh, come on, Noah," Katie said, putting on her best puppy dog eyes. "It would be, like, so cute for me and Sadie to be in a sorority. And this is, like, the nicest one we've found so far."

"If you manage to actually become a member," Noah responded. "This thing notes that even if they let you join, you're not officially in until you pass their seven secret tests. And you won't know that you're taking them until a member informs you that you've passed one. This is not something you can just waltz in and expect to charm your way to becoming one of them." He watched as the two girls sitting beside him started to pout slightly, disappointed at hearing what he had just told them. "Besides, that would barely leave you enough time to spend on something grandeur."

"What would that be?" Katie asked curiously.

"Me," Noah replied, forming a sly smirk on his lips. Within seconds, Katie was giggling and squealing with delight before throwing herself onto him and rapidly kissing his cheek.

Sadie let out a long sigh, watching her best friend smother the brainiac with endless love. She rested her head on her hand, which itself was supported at the elbow on the table, as she gazed at them. This went on for a moment until they saw someone approaching. It was DJ, carrying a tray of lunch in his hands. He looked very somber. So somber that it seemed to cause Katie to lose all her perkiness in an instant.

"Like, ohmygosh!" Sadie gasped as DJ sat down across from them. "Are you alright, DJ?"

"Tell me you didn't dare tackle the atrocity that is Chef's cooking," Noah said. While he hardly looked as worried or concerned as the girls, he did raise a brow that made it seem as though he appeared interested in uncovering DJ's plight.

"Nah," DJ answered, shaking his head gently. "Already depressed enough to consider eatin' his food."

"What's the matter?" Sadie asked, her worry increasing with each passing second.

"I dunno," DJ sighed as he began to pick at his food. "I ain't been feelin' all that well lately."

"Well, there's obviously a reason for it," Noah noted. "Unless you're suffering from some sort of mental disease, and that's hardly the case since Izzy has redefined the very meaning to the point that extremities are required to be diagnosed as such."

"Come on, DJ," Katie pleaded. "You can tell us. What's wrong?" She once again put on her best puppy dog eyes. And this time, it seemed to have worked as DJ let out another heavy sigh before he spoke following a moment's hesitation.

"You know that girl Janet?" he asked. The others immediately nodded, the girls rather enthusiastically. "Well... I like her, you know. I mean, I really like her."

"No surprise," Noah commented. "Every male student on campus is head over heels for her. She looks nothing like what the perceived beauty queen is supposed to be and yet all worship the ground she walks on."

"Ah, come on, Noah," Katie said, lightly tapping his shoulder in a slapping manner. "Don't, like, tease DJ for having a crush. I think it's so cute."

"Yeah, well, the problem is that..." DJ started to continue saying before he paused. He bit his lip and then once again let out a heavy sigh. "I think she may already be seein' someone else."

"Aww," Sadie uttered. "That is, like, so sad. You, like, find a girl you like and, like, she's already taken."

"What makes you think she's dating someone?" Noah asked, raising a brow.

"I, um..." DJ sheepishly muttered then paused again. "I think she's goin' out with Justin." This drew gasps from the girls, clearly shocked at what they had just heard. Noah did not appear to be phased one bit. "He had a photo of her next to his bed."

"So, the Anti-Me strikes," Noah stated coldly.

"No-ah!" Katie and Sadie hissed.

While Katie was clearly in love with Noah, she never really did like it whenever he insulted Justin. The way she saw it, Justin was too handsome to be treated as badly as her boyfriend did. He had since learned to tolerate this since she had no intention of ever leaving him for any one, even the male model.

"And because he has a picture of her by his bed, you've come to the conclusion that he's going out with Janet," Noah summarized, having slightly ignored the way Katie protested to his insulting Justin. DJ did not necessarily respond, though the way he shrunk his head into his shoulders made it clear that the statement was correct. "Well, you can rest easy. I happen to know for a fact that she's not dating any one. Not even Anti..." He paused when he noticed the stern looks he was receiving from Katie and Sadie. "Not even Justin."

"Really?" DJ asked, perking up in surprise.

"Because Courtney is a Student Council Representative, she makes contact with Janet, who is, of course, the Student Council Vice President," Noah began to explain. "Since I'm Courtney's chief of staff, I have to make sure she's able to function at her job as comfortably as possible. That includes keeping her update to date on the people that she works with so she'll know how to deal with them. Trust me, Janet has not been taken. While every boy in the school is in love with her, none have had the courage to step up and even attempt to befriend her."

"Ohmygosh, that's, like, good news!" Katie cheered.

"You can, like, totally ask Janet out now!" Sadie added, clapping her hands together with excitement. The girls appeared to be quite oblivious to how badly DJ was blushing.

"You... you really think so?" he asked quietly. He had barely spoken above a whisper, yet it seemed that Noah was able to understand very clearly what he was saying.

"You might as well," the egghead replied with a shrug. "If no one else is going to take a chance, this is probably as good of an opportunity as any for you to take your shot."

"But... but..." DJ started to muttered. His voice failed him, too flustered to say anything further.

"Look, just be yourself," Noah explained. "If she doesn't like you for who you are, then she's probably not the girl for you. Yet if she does like you for you, then you should have no problem sweeping her off her feet."

"You really think so?" DJ questioned further, raising a curious brow as he took in the advice that had been given to him.

"Worked for me," Noah answered. "And she was the one who initiated the relationship." Before anything more could be said any further, Katie started to squeal with delight as she wrapped herself ever so tightly around Noah. He merely grinned, displaying just how proud he was of himself.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now without Electric Fish)**

DJ - "Maybe Noah is right. The ball is in my court and I should run with it. Hopefully before Justin does." /_Pauses._/ "But what if he's already asked her out? What if she said yes? Then I'd feel so embarrassed about asking her out when she's already goin' out with Justin. What am I supposed to do then?"

Noah - "Seriously, I've suddenly turned into the problem solver around here. I should start charging people for my services. Twenty bucks for each consultation should do."

Sadie - /_Sighs longingly._/  
Katie - "Sadie?"  
Sadie - "Hmm? Oh, nothing."  
Katie - "Come on, Sadie. You're, like, my best friend forever. You can totally tell me anything."  
Sadie - "I know. It's just that... well..."  
Katie - "Yes?"  
Sadie - "Seeing you with Noah, now seeing DJ having a crush. I, like, feel heartsick, or something like that."  
Katie - "Awww, Sadie. Why didn't you, like, tell me sooner? We could have, like, so already been trying to hook you up."  
Sadie - "I didn't, like, wanna be a bother with the way you and Noah are, like, really hitting it off."  
Katie - "Oh, Sadie, you know we would, like, always lend a help..."  
Sadie - "Ohmygosh! What happened to Mr. Picklesworth?" /_Picks up destroyed plushie._/  
Katie - "Oh no! Not Mr. Picklesworth!" /_Gasps and picks up other destroyed plushie._/ "And Mrs. Pennytoe!"  
Sadie - "Who would, like, do such horrible things?" /_Cries._/

* * *

**(Break Week 1, Day 4 - Tuesday)**

"You think we'll make it past the one minute mark this time?" Gwen asked in a teasing manner.

"I sure hope so," Harold replied, running his fingers down each key on his keyboard. "It would be really cool if we can actually get started in putting some songs together."

"Just remember, guys," Trent said as he was tuning his guitar. "Bands don't usually come together over night."

"Don't we know it," Gwen responded with a light laugh.

"So," Courtney announced after letting out a big exhale. She had her violin in hand and was quite anxious to start playing it. "How are we going to do this again?"

"We'll be practicing exclusively to this song," Trent answered, giving her a copy of the music sheet. "We need to be able to know that all of the sounds are coming together just right."

"We have not made it to the actual singing of the song since Trent stops around thirty seconds in," Harold explained. "Whenever he does, we try do some tweaks and then start again."

"Do you want me to be co-singer as well?" Courtney asked curiously, noting that the song was a duet.

"I'll be doing that," Gwen answered rather firmly.

"While playing drums?" Courtney questioned.

"And that's a problem how?" Gwen asked back with a stern brow raised. Courtney got the message and said nothing further.

"Alright," Trent proclaimed, positioning himself on the stool. "From the top."

As before, the yet-to-be-official band was not alone in the Marshmallow. LeShawna, like last time, was seated as far back as possible. She was joined by Jessica, who it seemed was the only person at present Courtney felt comfortable leaving Brittany with. Not to say LeShawna was bad, just that she was concerned Brittany would do something that might rub LeShawna the wrong way. Thereby putting the truce in jeopardy.

Despite the addition of Courtney, Trent was still calling a stop to every practice run before they got to the actual singing. It was sounding better than it did without her. Nevertheless, all knew that it still was not coming together. The lack of bass was quite evident and it was frustrating Trent even more. At one point, he nearly kicked the stool he was sitting on.

"You want me to start drawing up flyers for an audition, babe?" Gwen asked bluntly.

"Why is it that you don't like auditions any way?" Courtney asked Trent curiously.

"Bad experiences," Trent merely replied. "The last time I had to sit through one, it was brutal. One guy even had the nerve to play a female mannequin torso with a string attached to it."

"We might as well have one any way," Harold noted. "I mean, it is not like a bass player is just going to fall onto our laps." As if on cue, the entrance to the amphitheater swung open.

"Joining us in watching one of my wards break down, sweetie?" Jessica asked the entrant.

"Not really," Jackson replied with a chuckle. "But I do come bearing good news. I found someone who can play bass." Everyone on the stage displayed a mixture of surprise and relief. Jessica, on the other hand, raised an intrigued brow.

"I take it he got kicked out of another one," she commented to her boyfriend, making it almost certain that she knew who it was that he was referring to.

"Actually, the band broke up this morning," Jackson responded as he sat himself next to his girlfriend. "Though he suspects that they broke up as a means of not having to say officially that they were giving him the boot."

"And you expect them to take this guy on?" LeShawna asked, becoming quite concerned over what she was hearing.

"To his credit, the guy is an excellent bassist," Jessica explained. "It's just that he was a rather unique personality. One that tends to rub others the wrong way."

"Sounds like the kind of guy who would've fit in on the show," Trent noted.

"Fair point," Jessica said in agreement.

"Does this bassist have a name?" Courtney asked curiously.

"His name is Thompson," Jackson answered. "He's my roommate."

"Only in the technical sense," Jessica stated, cracking a grin at the thought over what she had just said. "When was the last time he actually slept in his own bedroom, any way?"

"You mean before he applied for another PhD?" Jackson questioned back with another chuckle.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Courtney - "The way Jessica and Jackson put it, this guy could be an even crazier person that Izzy could ever hope to be."

Harold - "I know bands will kick someone out because personalities clash, but I cannot imagine one crazy enough receive the boot as many times as he did when he is applied for all those PhD's."

LeShawna - "There sure be a lotta strange folk goin' to this school. Makes me wonder how it is that it's as prestigious as Chris makes it out to be."

Trent - "Well, it's either him or go through an audition. And trust me, I've had bad luck with auditions back home."

Gwen - "Maybe I should draw up a flyer just in case..."

* * *

**(Break Week 1, Day 5 - Wednesday)**

"'oom, ex'oose me," Ezekiel managed to utter to every person that walked by. None seemed to be bothered to hear him out, if they chose to hear him at all. "Pard'oon me." He had only been trying to get someone's attention for the past five minutes, but it started to feel like he had been at it for an hour.

Having never been to a school before in his life, he had no clue as to what to expect from a building labeled the Gym and Fitness Center. Apparently, it was where the vast majority of all the training and exercise programs were designated. The trouble was that it made no mention about what kind of physical activity took place here. It had been suggested to him from Jessica that he should take up some sort of extracurricular activity as a means of expanding his sociology. He felt relatively at ease with archery and wanted to see if there was some kind of archery club at the school. He figured he would start at the Gym and Fitness center since it sounded like it would at least provide him with some information.

The size and scope literally overwhelmed him at first sight. It was said to have roughly two floors with a basement, but it looked so much bigger than he had pictured a building of such description to be. He thought it was more like twenty floors high than two. Inside, he understood why it was labeled as such given that there were only two levels. Yet each level was massive in its own right. Even the basement, which was apparently where the swimming pool was located. There was a front desk for the building, but the receptionist had stepped out for lunch. It appeared that the only way to access each level was with a card key that several students clearly possessed as they marched in and out with relative ease. Ezekiel was too afraid to try to tail someone entering just to get a look at what he might find inside.

It was another minute before he finally managed to get the attention of someone. A group of well built boys, a couple of them rather heavyset, were just about to make their way toward the basement when Ezekiel called out to them. They immediately stopped and turned, trying to find who it was that was speaking to them. It took them a second before looking down to catch sight of him. Confusion and displeasure painting their faces.

"The heck is this?" one of the heavyset boys muttered.

"Scrawniest thing I've seen all week," another mentioned, illiciting some chuckles from the others.

"Look pipsqueak, we ain't got all day," said a boy that had an air of importance to him. He was tall, skinny, and not quite as muscular as the others, but there was just something about him that made it clear that if he said something they would follow. "What do you want?"

"I, 'oom..." Ezekiel started to say before swallowing nervously. The boys appeared to literally tower over him and it didn't help that he was slowly shrinking into himself. "I w'oonted t'oo kn'oo where I c'ood find the archery cl'oob, eh."

The gang of boys stared at Ezekiel for a moment, seemingly in wonder if they heard him correctly. More importantly, if he was seriously seeking help from them of all people. Soon enough, they started letting out hearty laughs of disbelief. Only one did not laugh. In fact, he did nothing except stand still like a statue. Staring down at the prairie boy with cold, steel eyes. This did nothing to make Ezekiel any less uncomfortable around them.

"Can you guys believe this country shrimp?" the apparent leader of the pack stated in amusement to the others. "He doesn't know where the archery club is." He then proceeded to pull the toque from off of Ezekiel's head and tossed it over his shoulder for the others to catch and mess around with. Then he started knocking on the prairie boy's head. Ezekiel did nothing to fight back. "Hello? Hello? Anybody home? Huh? Crap like the archery club is for a buncha sissies. If you wanna be a real man, you'd join up an actual sport like football, baseball, or swimming. Definitely swimming. Certainly not this bow and arrow nonsense. Normally, me and the boys would do something to correct your ignorant line of thinking. But, I'm feeling a little generous. Since you're new here, I'm gonna cut you a break. Today. So, why don't you make like a tree and get outta here?"

"It's leave, you idiot," a new voice suddenly sounded. Everyone turned to see a few more boys emerging from the gym and looking none too pleased. The speaker was in the middle of this intruding group. "Make like a tree and leave. You sound like a damned fool when you say it wrong."

"Well, look who it is, boys?" the head of the first group proclaimed to the others. "Dallas come to stick his nose where it doesn't belong, like always. What's the matter, have nothing better to do than to inject yourself into other people's business?"

"You sure talk alot for a guy whose idea of fun is to mess with smaller folks, Tannen," the one named Dallas replied, crossing his arms over his chest. "How about trying someone your own size for a change and see if you'll be singing the same tune?"

"Oh, ha-ha-ha!" Tannen responded sarcastically. "That's about as funny as a screen door on a battleship."

"It's 'screen door on a submarine,' you dork," Dallas noted.

"Insult him again," one of the friends of Tannen declared, the formally silent one, stepping up into Dallas' face. "I dare you." He was more muscular than he was heavyset, but that made him no less of an imposing figure. So much so that those who were with Dallas backed up a bit. Dallas, on the other hand, stood his ground.

"My beef is not with you, Kael," Dallas stated. "It's with Tannen. But, if you want to act like the dog that he and the rest of those cronies make you out to be, I'll lay off for now. So long as the kid gets his toque back."

"What, this?" Tannen questioned, snatching the toque from one of the others in his group. He then looked down at Ezekiel, sneering really, and then blew his nose into the toque before tossing it to the prairie boy. Ezekiel stared at the soiled toque in his hands with a disgusted look on his face before glance up to Tannen. "What you looking at, butthead?"

With that, the group made their way down to the basement, satisfied with what they accomplished. Kael lingered for a moment to continue staring at Dallas before he joined the others. Dallas and his group eyed the direction they went before they turned their attention to Ezekiel. The prairie boy was back to looking at his toque with a frown.

"Hey, don't let them bother you too much," Dallas said, placing a reassuring hand on Ezekiel's shoulder. "Even in a school like this, there will always been a bunch of bullies picking on the little guys. Fortunately, there's an equal bunch of decent guys about to even the playing field. At least, we like to think of ourselves as decent."

"I j'oost w'oonted t'oo kn'oo where t'oo find the archery cl'oob," Ezekiel managed to utter.

"Archery club, huh?" Dallas noted with a chuckle. "So you fancy yourself as Robin Hood. Or perhaps one of his Merry Men. I hear it takes a lot of skill to use a bow and arrow. Not much good with both myself, but that's just me."

"You're in the wrong place to sign up for that, any way," one of the others in Dallas' group said as they came forward to crowd around the prairie boy. "You do that over at the Coliseum, since that's where the practices are held."

"We're actually on our way over there," Hemingway stated, a friendly smile forming on his lips. "Part of the basketball team, we are. Stick with us for a minute. We'll get you there in one piece."

"Really?" Ezekiel squeaked, perking up a bit. "Gee, thanks."

"No problem," Dallas said, patting Ezekiel on the shoulder. "Always willing to help out a little guy out. Particularly when they've just been picked on by Tannen and his goons."

"W'oot's there pr'ooblem any way, eh?" Ezekiel asked as he was led out of the building by Dallas and his friends.

"They think of themselves as being above everyone else," Dallas replied. "Just because they're part of some fancy little secret group, they feel they can do whatever they please."

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - "Athena tells me that Poseidon and Ares had a little run-in with Zeke today. Asked me if that was my doing. Not necessarily. And while I would have come up with a different way to deal with the sexist pig, it's not like I'm against what they did." /_Looks up at sports banners, rolls eyes._/ "God, this place is such a dump. I mean, look at the crap these people put in here. I'd do something to class this place up, but I'm certain these idiots would mess it up any way."

Justin - /_Oblivious to Angelina Jolie poster covering both sports banners, staring at Janet picture._/ "Ah, Janet... You could make me sit through _Mamma Mia!_ and I'd still adore you."

* * *

**(Break Week 1, Day 6 - Thursday)**

"You did say that he'd be coming at two, right?" Courtney asked anxiously. She was tapping her right foot every other second while the rest were merely content with maintaining a reasonable sense of patience.

"He said around two, not exactly two," Jackson noted. "He'll be here. Just in his own way." As before, LeShawna and Jessica were seated in the back of the Marshmallow. Jackson had joined them and Brittany was once more in Jessica's care.

"It's not like you're busy or anything, Courtney," Gwen stated, lightly running the tip of one of her drumsticks against the cymbal. "No need to be in a rush."

"I know, I know," Courtney responded, though it did not seem like she was taking Gwen's word to heart. "I just want to know that he'll work out so we can play another song for a change."

"I am more curious to know if he is as eccentric as Jessica and Jackson have been making him out to be," Harold said.

"I'm preparing myself in case he does turn out the way I'm imagining him to be," Trent said, gently strumming at the strings on his guitar. "Pretty much a male version of Izzy."

"And if he is, I wonder how the two would get along when they meet," LeShawna mused with a grin on her face.

Just then, the sound of bass playing was heard. It was a particular tune, one that Harold was quite sure he was familiar with. After a moment, the bass playing was joined by a whistle. Whistling a song that Harold was now very certain he should know. All looked over to see that Thompson had somehow managed to appear on stage.

He wore a frock coat, over his school uniform, that was faded brown and ran down to just below his knees. A dirty wide-brimmed felt fedora hat that covered his mass of brown curls. But perhaps more intriguing was the impractically long scarf that lines alternating between the school colors. It was wrapped once around his neck before both sides draped over the front of his tall, rather lanky figure. He continued to play a fender model precision bass until he stopped the song on his own. Upon looking up at everyone else, he grinned, which displayed his teeth quite prominently.

"I say, you haven't been waiting for me, have you?" he asked rather cheerfully. There was a slight British accent to his somewhat deep voice as he spoke. "It's just that time and I have never gotten along very well. I wish to be fashionably early, time wishes to be fashionably late. And no matter what, we can't seem to come to some sort of a compromise." Barely a second had passed before he outstretched his hand and approached the others on stage. "How do you? I'm Thompson. You're new bassist."

"Um... Trent..." Trent managed to utter as he cautiously took Thompson's hand to shake. "That's Gwen on the drums, Harold on keyboard, and Courtney on rhythm guitar and violin." Harold was the only one willing to wave, albeit in a confused state. Gwen merely stared at Thompson while Courtney had a concerned brow raised.

"A violinist, you say," Thompson said, looking as though he was perking up again even though he had not once dropped his previous expression. He glided right over to Courtney, standing so close that she had to lean back. "Surely you must be a fan of Johann Strauss II, or at least a great admirer of his work. I've always believed that was never a moment that was inappropriate for a good waltz, wouldn't you agree my dear?"

"What?" Courtney squeaked, clearly unsure of what to make of the person before her.

"Perhaps you might consider easing up on the social skills," Jessica suggested, speaking more than loud and clear enough for everyone on stage to hear. "I believe they're more interested in your ability to play the instrument in your hands."

"Oh, this old thing?" Thompson asked, holding up his bass guitar slightly as though he needed to examine it. "Well, it would certainly make sense to prove upon my new companions that I am able to perform the duties of a bassist. What shall I be playing first? A little John Entwistle, Steve Jones perhaps. I can even do Les Claypool or Tetsuya Ogawa, if you want me to."

"How about just this one to start with?" Trent responded, carefully handing out the music sheet. Thompson took it, glanced over it in just a couple seconds, and then handed it back to him.

"Fine choice, my good man," Thompson proclaimed. "Is there a particular position you would like me to stand? I tend to prefer being to the left of whomever is the lead guitarist, but I'm content with whatever set up you wish to go with."

"I take it you're familiar with the song we are going to play," Harold commented.

"Oh, Heaven's no," Thompson responded, still maintaining the pleasant tone of voice with his ever present grin. "I never even heard the song before, actually. Will be familiarizing it for the first time."

"Yet you know how to play it?" LeShawna asked, looking quite perplexed.

"Of course," Thompson answered. "I know it by heart."

The four on stage stared at their new bassist for a moment. Then they looked to one another, greatly concerned and baffled by what they were getting themselves into. They even managed to glance over to those in the back of the amphitheater. LeShawna was just as dumbfounded as they were while Jackson shrugged and Jessica raised a brow, as if to say she had warned them. Each taking individual breaths, they decided to take a chance and proceeded to play.

"Alright," Trent uttered, getting himself into position. "From the top."

The group started to play the same song they had been playing before. This time, it sounded much better. The inclusion of a proper bass made all the difference and everything started to come together. What's more, Thompson did indeed know how to play the song despite the claim that he never heard of it before. It was turning out so well in fact that Trent did not call for a stop. Instead, they kept right on going until they finally reached the lyrics.

**Trent:  
**_Another ringer with the slick trigger finger for Her Majesty_

**Gwen:  
**_Another one with the golden tongue poisoning your fantasy_

**Trent:  
**_Another bill from a killer, turned a thriller to a tragedy_

**Trent and Gwen:  
**_Yeah, a door left open, a woman walking by  
A drop in the water, a look in your eye  
A phone on the table, a man on your side  
Or someone that you think that you can trust  
It's just another way to die_

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with an Angelina Jolie Poster)**

Trent - "Well... He is the excellent bassist he was made out to be, I'll give him that."

Gwen - "I don't think I could quite handle someone like him for a very long time. Fortunately, we don't have to endure his presence everyday. Just whenever we get together as a band."

Harold - "I swear, I feel like I know that song he played he when first showed up. And how did he show up any way?"

Courtney - "You wouldn't be able to see it at first glance, but he certainly has a similar personality to that of Izzy. It's just done in a very different way."

LeShawna - "That's one messed up dude, if you ask me."

Chris - /_Sniggers._/ "I can't wait to see what this guy does to them in the long run. Makes me wish we had him on the show in the first place. Oh well, at least we'll get to see more of him for now."

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Car Air Freshener hanging from Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering _Wing Commander_ Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, _9_ Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, Angelina Jolie Poster covering Toronto Maple Leafs Banner and Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with Two Destroyed

**Removed:**

Electric Fish

* * *

First off, a reminder for those who haven't seen it already. I've launched **Return to Total Drama Island**, which follows the ten that are currently not present at Richmore Academy during the two-week break period. Be sure to check it out to see what trouble they find themselves in as they're forced back onto Camp Wawanakwa with the Outsiders, Alejandro and Sierra.

As you can see, I've started introducing some more original characters. Their purpose will be played out as the story progresses, some may even be sticking around into **Year Two** if all goes to plan. Perhaps you might recognize who Thompson is modeled after. Maybe even Tannen. Can any one figure out Kael? How about the song the band was playing? No cookies this time for correct guesses, because I'm seriously loaded at the moment with stories to write and art to draw at the moment.

I also introduced the Beta Gamma Pi sorority, but I'm still feeling out in my head how to properly included it into the story. I just needed some kind of conversation going for Noah, Katie, and Sadie before they comfort DJ. Beta Gamma Pi was suggested by Aravi Velez through the **Richmore Academy Wiki** and I figured I'd show my appreciation for the work she had done on it in the past.

Speaking of the Richmore Academy Wiki, come on over and help me out in editing the sucker. Granted I will do the vast majority of the heavy work, it would be nice to get some activity rolling.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** What's in a Name


	32. Break Week 1, Part 3

**Total Drama Academy**

**Year One**

a _Total Drama_ fan fiction story

by Lord Akiyama

* * *

**Author's Note:** Just remember that this story is created under the assumption that _Total Drama Action_ does not happen. Though I may consider throwing in elements that I like. Meaning this story should be considered alternate universe. Strange how that works, don't you think?

_Total Drama_ and its characters are copyright © of Fresh TV, Teletoon and Cartoon Network. This story was created purely out of sheer enjoyment so please don't sue. Or throw me off a thousand-foot high cliff into a shark-infested lake. That would so smarts.

* * *

Chapter Thirty-Two

**(Break Week 1, Day 7 - Friday)**

"Ah, here we are," Courtney announced, jogging just slightly to reach the door she had been looking for within the main school facility. "Science Lab Four. And look, his name is on the door. 'Doctor Thompson Newman, M.A., Ph. D., Sc. D.'"

"I hear there is a theoretical physicist in California with a similar credentials and he might just be only a couple years older," Harold noted aloud as he caught up to her with Gwen and Trent just behind him. "I also hear he also has quite the superiority complex that would put Chris to shame. Would probably Noah to shame too."

"Remind us again why we're here, Courtney?" Gwen muttered, rubbing her eyes as though she had just woken up minutes ago.

"Well, I figure this would be a good opportunity to get to know our new bassist in a more personal environment," Courtney answered.

"And we couldn't just wait for him to join us for lunch like he said he would because..." Trent questioned further, raising a brow and crossing his arms over his chest in the process.

"I also thought it would be nice to actually see him at work," Courtney replied. It would seem that she had been prepared for the questions being asked and already knew how to answer them. "I mean, the level of genius he apparently has is off the charts."

"I must admit that I too am interested in seeing how he is as a scientist," Harold said, speaking a bit of enthusiasm that was fairly close to matching that which Courtney was displaying.

"So why the hell did Trent and I get roped along?" Gwen groaned in annoyance.

"Clearly because you're just as curious about what makes him tick as Harold and I are about his intellect," Courtney answered in a rather confident manner. Gwen looked her for a moment before she ultimately shrugged.

"You got me there," Gwen muttered quietly.

Courtney knocked lightly on the door before turning the knob and entering. From the outside, the positioning of all the doors would have made one expect to be entering a room that would cater to a small class, probably no more than ten or fifteen students. It instead looked as though it was the inside of a three room apartment. Which seemed rather curious because the way everything was situated did not make it look as though the other rooms connected at all with the other doors outside. Almost as though they had suddenly stepped into some other dimension where one small room was the size of three big ones.

"Hello?" Courtney called as the four slowly entered. "Dr. Newman? It's us. Your new band-mates." Once all four had stepped inside, the let the door slowly close itself. Which was when the room's occupant presented himself from underneath a nearby desk.

"Don't let the door close!" Thompson cried, trying desperately to get to his feet and hurry over to the door. "Don't let the door-" Too late. The door closed and there was a clicking sound that followed. Thompson stopped in place and made a poor attempt at grinning so that he would look like he was not in a panic. "Oh dear. This is not good."

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry if we're a disturbance," Courtney apologized nervously. "We'll just wait outside until-"

"The door's locked," Trent stated in disbelief. The other three looked over to confirm his finding before turning to Thompson with confusion painted across their faces.

"Of course it is," Thompson responded, looking as though he was admonishing them while he went back over to his desk. "You see, I have programmed the door to automatically lock itself from the inside whenever I am in the middle of conducting an experiment. Keeps whatever I manage to create from running loose on the unsuspecting public. Which, I'm afraid, has happened on occasion." It seemed like he was trying to make the others feel calm. It only made them very uneasy.

"Then why isn't the door also locked on the outside?" Gwen asked curiously, jerking a thumb behind her.

"An unfortunate glitch in the locking mechanism," Thompson replied as he examined the liquid contents of a vile he brought up to eye-level. "Been meaning to fix it. Although I must say having placed a sign on the door that stated clearly 'Warning: Do not enter under any circumstances when the red light above the door is activated unless you accept responsibility for whatever consequences you may suffer from within' has diminished the number of accidents that have occurred."

"How did you miss that sign, Courtney?" Gwen grumbled quietly through gritted teeth at Courtney. The other girl merely responded by giving off an embarrassed smile.

"How did we miss the red light?" Harold thought curiously aloud, scratching his head.

"Might I suggest, since you four are stuck in here, that you refrain from touching anything while I try to finish my experimentation as quickly as possible," Thompson announced as he rushed over to another desk with clipboard in hand. "It would be a terrible inconvenience for everyone should something happen to you just as we got together as a band."

"Thanks a lot, Courtney," Gwen muttered further to Courtney with a hard glare.

"So I didn't read the sign under his name," Courtney responded in a frantic whisper. She appeared to be desperately trying to remain calm under the circumstances. "As long as we don't touch anything, we should be fine."

"Not with our luck," Gwen noted as she merely turned away and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Dr. Newton," Trent began to say in an effort to break the building tension.

"Please, Thompson will do," Thompson responded, looking up just for a brief moment to smile before returning to his work. "That or just simply Doctor. I feel a little queasy when addressed too formally."

"Okay," Trent uttered in bewilderment. He then cleared his throat and continued speaking. "Well, Thompson. Since we're stuck you, you mind telling us what kind of experiment you're doing?"

"A little something one of my younger brothers challenged me to investigate," Thompson answered while going over notes he had just written down on his clipboard. "It has to do with a ridicules notion that the space time continuum could be easily disrupted with the right chemical mixture." The only one of the others who did not appear perplexed after hearing all of that was Harold.

"You mean you are testing the possibility of time travel?" Harold questioned with a mixture of excitement and disbelief.

"Good gracious, I already proved that eons ago," Thompson replied with a nonchalant wave before pressing a few buttons on a nearby control pad. "No, this is more along the lines of whether or not the process of time travel could be stopped suddenly by the use of a controlled substance." The others looked at one another more confused than ever since walking into the room.

"Excuse me?" Gwen asked with a raised brow.

"Ludicrous hypothesis, really," Thompson continued, seemingly unaware of the state the others were in over what he had just said before and monitoring liquids that were boiling. "You see, he believes that, when in the process of time travel, the use of this substance can make an emergency stop should one recognize a break in the continuum, thus allow for them to reserve and not get caught in the rather catastrophic wave of time damage."

"Did any one get what he's talking about?" Trent whispered to the others. They all responded by shaking their heads. It was then that things took an interesting turn rather suddenly.

"Courtney!" Thompson yelled before marching over toward her. He appeared to be trying his best to restrain how miffed he seemed to be. "What did I just say about not touching anything?"

"I wasn't touching anything," Courtney responded innocently.

"I can clearly see your elbow resting on the counter there," Thompson stated, pointing it out for the others to see. They were confused about the behavior he was displaying, though it only added to their bewilderment of what they had gotten themselves into.

"You mean we're literally not to touch anything?" Courtney questioned in disbelief.

"Precisely!" Thompson answered, acting as though something bad was going to happen at any second. "Haven't you been paying attention to what I'm experimenting with? The rules of the space time continuum are still in effect and you caused a disruption, however accidental, just by touching the counter!"

A peculiar event took place just then. They heard the sound of something exploding, looking over just in time to catch a green liquid substance flying at them from one of the desks. And then it froze in place for a moment before seemingly rewinding back to the point before the explosion. With a sudden blink, they suddenly found themselves drenched in an orange liquid substance with the other desk now looking as though it was the one that suffered an explosion. Nothing more happened and all five merely stared at the scene for a brief moment.

"Intriguing," Thompson uttered. He then licked some of the liquid substance around his mouth, taking his time to taste it completely. "Not very often poison tastes like raspberry." The others reacted as one would expect after hearing this.

"We're covered in poison?" Trent yelled in horror.

"One of the many unfortunate side-effects to the components required for the experiment," Thompson answered calmly, examining himself and the others as though there was nothing to worry about. "Just don't ingest and you will be fine."

"What about you?" Harold asked with great concern. "You just swallowed it."

"I have done a lot of things to myself in the name of science," Thompson responded in a rather jolly manner bolstered by a smile that unfortunately did little to ease the others. "And, as a result, my body has been kind enough to develop a natural immunity to poison. I'll be fine. Although I strongly suggest we get ourselves cleaned up immediately. Another side-effect to the components used is a peculiar skin pigmentation which will permanently turn our bodies blue in ten minutes." Hearing this made one of the others respond far worse than they had done thus far.

"Are you serious?" Courtney shrieked.

"Afraid so," Thompson replied. "But not to worry. My canine companion will remove the substance within five minutes. G-4!"

A small panel at the foot of one of the side walls opened. Then a robot figure, shaped to imply the appearance of a dog, rolled out into the room. Among the more curious features present include small dish antennas for ears, one red light panel in place of eyes, and a small tube-shaped object hanging out of where the mouth would normally be.

"MAS-TAH?" the robot called G-4 stated in a computerized voice that tried to sound like a fairly pitched human man.

"Initiate emergency wash procedure delta-nine-echo on five humanoid individuals," Thompson ordered with a nod.

"AH-FUR-MA-TIVE." G-4 stated. "KAH-MEN-SING WASH PRO-SEED-YOUR DEL-TA NINE EH-CO."

"Poor fellow needs some work on his English," Thompson noted aside to the others. "Something else I've been meaning to fix, actually." He was about to put his fingers into his ears when he quickly noticed the others were not doing the same thing. Only continuing to stare at him with confused expressions. "Might I recommend covering your ears, closing your eyes, and holding your breath." They did not hesitate to do as he said before G-4 proceeded to douse them in a soapy substance.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Gwen - /_Wears a fresh set of clothes and wet hair is combed._/ "And today's lesson, boys and girls? Never go anywhere with Courtney at seven in the morning on an off day. In fact, it's given me an idea of something to add to this place."

Courtney - /_Wears a shower robe and has hair wrapped in a towel, sees duplicate of Warning sign over Angelina Jolie poster._/ "Oh come on! Is this really necessary? I get it, I should have looked before I entered. And how was I supposed to know he was being literal about not touching anything?" /_Sighs._/

Harold - /_Still in his regular clothes, soaked in soapy water._/ "Even though I just spent three months on an island with all sort of interesting people, he manages to do things that I do not expect. Nevertheless, I do not find him all that discomforting to be around given the brilliance he possesses." /_Notices Warning sign._/ "You know, this sign would make a lot more sense if we had a red light installed in here to go along with it."

Trent - /_Also wears a fresh set of clothes and wet hair is combed._/ "I'm beginning to see why Jessica would say that he had a unique personality that rubbed people the wrong way. I think Jackson got lucky with Thompson barely sleeping in his actual room. Imagine trying to live under the same roof as him for a week."

Chris - /_Taps his chin thoughtfully._/ "You know, this guy could be very useful in developing cool new challenges..."

* * *

"Okay, DJ," DJ muttered quietly to himself. "You can do this. Just like Noah said. Just be yourself." He peeked around the corner to catch a glimpse of Janet. She was walking toward his general direction sounded by a small group of girls. They were all chatting together rather happily. For whatever reason, it only made Janet look that much more alluring.

"I can't do it," DJ uttered frantically as he reared back in a hiding position behind the wall. "I can't do it." He took a pair of deep breaths and then tried to muster some form of courage. "Yes, you can. Yes, you can." He then took another peek at Janet, staring at her for a moment before he panicked again. "What if she doesn't like me? No, she does like you. Remember? She saw the show and liked when you reunited with Bunny." He unconsciously ran his hand in the air, as though he were stroking his pet rabbit. Only to realize he was not holding Bunny. And then he started to worry again. "But what if she doesn't like me in that way?" He took another pair of deep breaths and turned to look at her. What he did not expect was to suddenly be within inches of her. Nor was he expecting her to catch sight of him.

"Hi, DJ!" Janet spoke in a sing-song voice. Seeing her look at him and smile the way she did caused him to shiver with absolute fright. What in the world was he supposed to do now?

"H-Hi, J-Janet..." he managed to blurt out, almost unconsciously. "N-Nice to s-see y-you here..." The girls that were accompanying Janet started to giggle, though he was not sure in what manner they were doing so.

"Nice to see you here, too," Janet responded. She let out a giggle of her own, but it was clear that it was out of kindness. At least, that was the impression he got. He hoped he was right.

"He's blushing," one of the girls whispered to Janet, though DJ could clearly hear her. "I think he likes you." He had no doubt that he had indeed been blushing. For her to point that out, it caused his cheeks to intensify with heat.

"Quinn, you're embarrassing him," Janet said, trying to scold her friend though she did so in a way so sweet that it almost defeated the purpose. She turned back to DJ and sighed. "I'm so sorry about my friends. They can be such a tease."

"N-No p-problem..." DJ managed to say. The other girls giggled some more, leaving little doubt that they found this amusing.

"Hey, Janet," another girl said, again whispering though she could easily be heard. "Maybe he can come along, too."

"Pam!" Janet nearly screamed. She sounded as though she were the one being embarrassed all of a sudden. Yet it still did not ease the nervousness DJ had been feeling all day.

"Come on," a third girl said, giving Janet a gentle nudge. "You said it yourself. It would be really nice to have a guy around so we can have his perspective. And he's right here. So why don't you ask him."

"You guys," Janet said, giving out an rather embarrassed whine. She was starting to blush, which only made DJ blush even harder himself. She turned back to him in a shy manner and spoke to him again. "My friends and I are thinking of doing a little shopping downtown tomorrow and then maybe eat out for dinner. We were wondering if maybe you would like to join us?"

"M-Me?" he uttered, though it sounded more like a squeak than anything.

"Sure," Janet replied with a gentle nod. "I think you would fit in very nicely."

"Of course you would," the fourth and last of the girls said out loud.

"Velma!" Janet cried. It only encouraged the girls to giggle some more until they suddenly stopped and gasped in unison.

"Oh... my... gosh..." Pam slowly stated. All of the girls, with the exception of Janet, huddled together and began to squirm with absolute delight. DJ turned to look and what it was that had caught their attention. And it caused his heart to sink.

"Why hello there, ladies," Justin said, sounding very much like the most handsome hunk that he was. As if he needed to illustrate that fact even more, his perfectly white teeth shined with a chiming sound. Furthermore, he felt the need to pose whenever the need touched him. Which seemed like the need for him to do so was all the time.

"Hi..." the other girls responded breathlessly. Janet merely smiled and sheepishly tried to look away while blushing.

"DJ, aren't you going to introduce me to these lovely girls?" Justin questioned DJ directly. DJ was not prepared to have his presence be recognized by the boy who was also his roommate. So unprepared that his could barely open his mouth to answer. Fortunately, or maybe unfortunately for him, someone else spoke.

"These are my friends," Janet said, waving her hand at them in a shy manner. She then began to point them out individually. "That's Quinn, Cathy, Velma, and Pam."

"Hi..." Cathy breathlessly said again.

"Gosh, he's gorgeous..." Velma uttered unconsciously.

"And did I happen to overhear you correctly?" Justin asked further. "You're in need of a male perspective in shopping?" If only DJ could sense whether or not there was something deliberate to the way the male model was speaking and presenting himself. Then he would know for sure if this was some attempt at flattering Janet before he could do anything about it.

"Well, I did think it would be nice to have one," Janet replied nervously. She glanced down to watch herself run the toe of her shoe along the ground for a brief second. "And I was going to ask DJ since the girls pointed out that he's right here."

"What about Justin?" Quinn nearly cried.

"How about asking him?" Pam questioned, as if she needed to push her friend into doing so.

"Of course I would like to join you ladies," Justin proclaimed. He paused, waiting for the other girls to finish with their gasping and squealing. Then he spoke again, this time in a lower voice. "That is if you want me to."

This was turning into an absolute nightmare for DJ. Here he was, bumbling his way into possibly hanging out with the girl that he liked when the one person he desperately did not want to compete with for her affection suddenly appeared. What's worse, he froze up and now he was forced to watch as Justin was clearly thrusting himself into being the one that goes shopping with Janet. It seemed only a matter of time before the final nail in the coffin was set.

And yet, there appeared to be a ray of hope. Janet was hesitating. DJ knew from the show back on the island that for a girl to not fall hopelessly for Justin she would have to have had a very good reason. Like how it took Trent throwing himself in her view to get Gwen from being hypnotized by Justin's bare chest. Furthermore, he seemed to recall how she was more entranced by Trent's own bare chest. So what was keeping Janet from sealing the deal with Justin? What was keeping her from outright telling Justin that he was more than welcome to go along with her?

"Well..." Janet started to say, nervously twirling the end of the bushy ponytail that hung over her right shoulder. She then looked as though she was addressing the both of them. Something else DJ didn't expect and neither did Justin or the other girls. "How about this? Would you both like to come along with us? I don't think we would mind the extra company." This caught everyone by surprise. For whatever reason, no one was expecting this. The other girls in particular.

"Why bring both?" Pam asked in disbelief. "We only need Justin..."

"Please say yes, Justin..." Velma pleaded.

Something clicked in DJ's mind. Something about needing to jump at this opportunity that had presented itself. Noah had mentioned that no other boy had ever had the courage to go up and even attempt to befriend her. This was his chance to do what apparently so many others failed to do before him. He needed to do it now before Justin once again tried to snatch it away from him.

"S-Sure!" DJ nearly yelled in a high-pitched voice. Once it was clear that he managed to obtain everyone's attention, he swallowed and returned to his previous state of nervousness. "I'd be w-willing to g-go along with y-you..."

"Really?" Janet responded in delight. "Oh, thank you, DJ. That's so sweet of you."

"In that case, I'd be willing to go, too," Justin quickly proclaimed. This resulted in the other girls nearly passing out with absolute excitement, having to hold on to one another to keep themselves upright.

"Thank you, Justin..." Janet responded sheepishly. "Very nice of you to join us..."

"So nice..." Quinn uttered unconsciously. There came a long moment of silence as everyone simply stared at one another. DJ and Justin at Janet. Janet at her feet. The other girls at Justin.

"Well..." Janet finally managed to say with a soft giggle. "Meet us at the cafeteria tomorrow morning at around ten?"

"Sounds good to me," Justin said with a shrug. "Enough time to get in an extra hour of beauty sleep." The other girls apparently couldn't take any more of it as they swooned in unison and than collapsed, having nearly fainted in the process.

"T-Ten works for me," DJ uttered sheepishly.

"Okay then..." Janet muttered quietly as she giggled. She went to work picking her friends up and setting them each back onto their feet so they could leave. "We'll see you both then... Byeee..." She waved very shyly before pushing her friends into leaving the boys behind. Allowing for both to glance at one another with uncertainty for a moment.

* * *

**(Confession Cam - Now with a "Warning: Do not enter under any circumstances when the red light above the door is activated unless you accept responsibility for whatever consequences you may suffer from within" Sign)**

Justin - "Really? Of all people, DJ is the one that tries to woo Janet? Please. He's suffering from delusions of adequacy."

DJ - /_Curls up in a fetal position and sucks on thumb._/

* * *

"Come on, Noah," Katie pleaded as she dragged her egg-head boyfriend by the arm into her wanna-be twin's room. "We wanna, like, get your opinion about the guy Sadie so wants to date."

"You really sure you want my opinion?" Noah asked with a curious brow raised. "You know as well as any one I hate people not you or myself. Besides, you get on my case for knocking the Anti-Me-"

"No-ah!" Katie cried sternly.

"My point exactly," Noah responded. "With how you react to the way I despise... him... what makes you think I would think any more positively to whatever beefcake you two manage to find?"

"True," Katie began to reply. "But then your reaction will, like, give us a better idea of just how well she might, like, match up with her beau. You so may not like him, but we'll, like, be able to rate Sadie's chances with hooking up with him."

"In other words, you're using me to gauge the probability of whether or not Sadie would successfully pair with whichever boy you two look at," Noah summarized. "Fascinating."

"I found the video!" Sadie cried from the computer. "I found the video!"

"Like, ohmygosh!" Katie gasped with excitement as quickly hurried over to join Sadie. Once she sat down, the video clip played and the girls watched with their arms around each other as the seemingly prospective boyfriend appeared on the screen.

"EEEEEEEEEE!" they squealed at the very sight of him.

Noah watched from a fair enough distance to see that this boy apparently had a well toned body that was slightly covered by a silver white coat that shimmered, shined, and glittered under the lights, which was also the case with the pants he was wearing. He had brown hair that, with the right amount of combing and gel use, had spikes strategically placed so that it would still come off masculine while also having an air of sensitivity. Throw in facial features of a Japanese ethnicity that made him look more cute than handsome, and Noah was able to pin down right away what kind of boy Katie and Sadie were looking at.

"I take it you're into the metro-sexual variety," Noah commented aloud.

"Shh!" both girls hushed at him before turning back to the video. They watched as the boy was dancing to some upbeat techno music along with four girls who were dressed to compliment him in the performance. When the video was over a minute later, Katie and Sadie squealed some more while clapping their hands.

"He's, like, so dreamy!" Katie swooned.

"I know, right?" Sadie cooed. "And the best part is that, like, according to his Facebook status, Hulk, like, goes to school and and, like, better yet... he's single!" The wanna-be twins resumed their squealing.

"His name is Hulk?" Noah asked curiously.

"Uh-huh," Sadie answered, nodding her head rapidly while hopping up and down in her seat. "Have you, like, heard of him?"

"As a matter of fact, I think have," Noah replied, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Really?" Katie gasped in excitement. "Like, ohmygosh! So you can, like, tell us how Sadie can, like, hook up with him!"

"Yeah, about that," Noah respond. "If we're talking about the same Hulk, and chances are that is the case, than I'm afraid you're just gonna end up wasting your time." The two girls looked at him with bewilderment and disbelief.

"Like, how come?" Sadie asked.

"Here's the deal," Noah began to explain. "On one hand, he has no problem going out with any girl. It doesn't matter what their height is, how much they way, their shape, size, color, ethnicity, deformity, whatever. If it's human, he'll willingly accept a date with them." The last sentence he spoke brought about a gasp from the wanna-be twins.

"You mean he's gay?" Katie questioned in shock.

"He swings both ways, if you catch my drift," Noah answered. The girls looked at one another for a moment, seemingly sharing an intrigued through, before turning back to him. "But that's hardly the kicker. The thing is that he's a one and done kind of guy. After one date with someone, he moves on to the next person in line. He rarely ever goes on a second date with any one, and even if he does, he's only doing it as a means of getting him associated with someone else."

"How do you, like, know all this stuff, Noah?" Sadie asked in amazement.

"Working for Courtney, I have to familiarize myself with students who might have an affect on her political career," Noah reminded them simply. "He happens to be on the radar, so I read up on everything I could find about him. His dating habits happens to be something that it pretty well known around the school."

"Are you sure you're, like, not just saying this because you're, like, so jealous of how cute he is?" Katie questioned, looking at her boyfriend in a suspicious manner.

"I'm not saying you should heed my words and not pursue him," Noah responded calmly. "Like Katie told me, I'm merely providing you the basis for which to gauge whether or not he is worth going after. But if you really want a piece of advice from me to consider, I suggest you keep looking for other fish in the sea."

Katie and Sadie looked at one another with concern and then looked at the computer monitor to replay the video clip. Only this time, they lacked the enthusiasm they had moments ago the first time. It was almost as though Noah had managed to change their whole perspective of the boy they had pegged to be the one Sadie would pursue as a boyfriend. That they went from believing he was the perfect Adonis to being an unknown entity.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Sadie - /_Sighs._/ "Am I, like, ever gonna have a boyfriend?"  
Katie - "Like, Of course you will. I'm sure there's, like, so many other guys who would like to go out with you."  
Sadie - "You're, like, just saying that because you're my friend."  
Katie - "True, but I, like, also believe there's so a boyfriend here at this school for you to hook up with."  
Sadie - "You really think so?"  
Katie - "Sure I do."  
Sadie - "What makes you so sure?"  
Katie - "Because you're, like, the cutest girl I know. Even Noah believes in you."  
Sadie - "That's because he's, like, dating you."  
Katie - "True, but he, like, is so helpful to those in need."  
Sadie - "We're, like, talking about the same Noah, right?"  
Katie - "Sure he, like, looks down on other people. But, like, when he cares, he really cares. He's, like, helping DJ try to hook up with Janet and he's, like, looking out for your well-being in, like, finding a boyfriend of your own."  
Sadie - /_Brightens._/ "You're, like, so totally right, Katie. If you believe in me, if, like, Noah believes in me, then I can find my boyfriend, like, somewhere in this school."  
Katie - "That's my BFFFL!" /_Embraces Sadie._/

Noah - "In all honesty, I'm merely helping Katie get Sadie hooked up because that means we don't have to deal with Sadie being a third-wheel any longer. But because I'm dating Katie, I have to really put some effort in making sure there's legs in whatever relationship we get her in." /Pauses./ "What I said about Hulk is true, but I decided not to mention anything about the side of him he doesn't show to the public. Frankly, they probably wouldn't believe me. But even if they did, I'm not sure if they would take seriously just how dangerous this guy really is."

* * *

"Freddy-Baby," the girl with the curly red pig tails said into her cell phone, speaking with a very stern tone. "It's Peggy Sue. The daughter of a certain someone you know. Listen, I need you to make a delivery to the school by next Friday. I'm thinking twelve cases. Yes, I said twelve. Are you deaf or something? So no less than twelve cases by no later than next Friday. You got that? Thank you, Freddy-Baby." After hanging up, she slouched slightly in her throne and groaned. "Retard..."

"What was that about?" Heather asked curiously from her throne.

"You have no idea the crap I have to put up with to fulfill my role as Demeter," Peggy Sue replied with a hint of sarcasm. "It's like these lazy bums want to forget who my father is and don't want to do anything I tell them to. They keep testing my patience and I'll make sure they're homeless by the end of the week."

"You should probably do it any way," Heather suggested, tapping the side of her chin softly with her finger. "They'll only get bolder and bolder the longer you keep having to put up with them."

"If it were only that simple, Heather," Peggy Sue responded, rolling her eyes and letting out a heavy sigh. "I need a damned good reason before I talk to my father. He hates having to hire new people."

"What are the twelves cases for, any way?" Heather asked, again out of curiosity.

"For the party Dionysus got the okay last week to throw," Peggy Sue answered. She was about to say more when she heard the door leading into the room creek open. "Speak of the devil..."

Heather imagined if the boy had walked into the Dodekatheon throne room with accompanying music, it would be Gothic, almost demonic in nature. His dark black hair nearly covered his entire face, with barely any visibility to his eyes and his mouth seemingly the only part fully exposed. Even his lips were painted black, presumably to contrast with how his skin was dangerously close to being pale white. One would believe he looked very much like an emo until they got a further look at him. He wore his toga so loose that it was hardly covering his upper body, which revealed one of the most finely toned and well built frames any one had ever seen. He had the kind of chest that gave Justin a run for his money, even with red wine having been spilled all over it.

"Ladies," he purred, speaking with an apparent Japanese accent. He sat himself lazily in his throne and snapped his fingers. Seconds later, a younger boy, dressed in rags, approached with a bottle of wine that the other took and began to drink from.

"Aren't you hitting the wine a little early?" Peggy Sue questioned, raising a brow at him. "It's only ten in the morning."

"That late?" Dionysus responded with a chuckle, wearing a grin that both charmed and terrified Heather.

"Ah, Artemis," another voice said. "Just the girl I'm looking for." It belonged to a female, also with a Japanese accent, though she seemed to have a better grasp of the English language than Hulk. Before Heather knew it, the owner of the voice slithered into her view, practically sitting on her lap in quite a suggestive position. She had the same skin complexion as Dionysus as well as having painted her lips black, but her hair was not as dark and each strand curled at the ends, which hung below the side of her face as opposed to covering it. Nevertheless, she wore her toga dangerously loose and had a grin that was clearly seductive.

"How can I be of service, Aphrodite?" Heather asked uncomfortably, trying to lean back as much as she could.

"You can be of service to me in bed, Artemis," Aphrodite purred with a slight whisper, edging her head closer to Heather's face. "I'm in desperate need of some warm company, if you know what I mean."

"Not interested," Heather said firmly, turning her face away from the other.

"Shame," Aphrodite responded with seductive gentleness. She inched her head some more so that her lips would be close to Heather's exposed ear. "And here I thought a little of my special intoxication chemical that harlot Jessica used for those silly little games you're forced to play would still be lingering."

"If you recall, I was trying very hard not to breath the gas in," Heather muttered with a slight groan. "Otherwise, I'd be that much closer to locking lips with the Loser Nerdling."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Aphrodite said, trying to give off a pouting voice.

"Tell me you don't find him attractive," Heather responded, turning her head to face the other with contempt and disbelief. "I know you want to bed anything with two legs, but I'm sure you have your limits."

"What can I say?" Aphrodite purred quietly, moving her face so that her lips were inches away from Heather's. "I love the freckles." Heather didn't know if she was joking or not. It only made her feel all the more uncomfortable around this girl.

"Aphrodite, stop trying to seduce Artemis before Zeus and Hera return," Peggy Sue stated, looking and sounding very unnerved by what she was just watching. "You know how much it annoys them when you and your twin brother do that to everyone."

"My offer still stands, Artemis," Aphrodite said to Heather, reluctantly sliding away and then slithering off of her completely. She gave her another seductive look before walking away in a suggestive manner. Heather felt as though she was about to throw up.

Suddenly, a crash was heard. It was not very loud by itself, but in this room, the echoes made it seem bigger. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked over to the source of the crash. The ragged looking boy had apparently dropped another bottle of wine and it had spilled all over Dionysus' feet. Dionysus did not move, did not even flinch, and just sat as though he were a statue. After a while of nothing happening, the boy looked to turn away. In a flash, one of Dionysus' feet caught the boy by the neck and seemingly formed him to turn back. Heather could almost hear psychotic music starting to play right about now.

"Where do you think you're going, peasant?" Dionysus asked in a quiet voice that seemed to be both soothing and sinister at the same time. He then lifted his other foot and waved it in front of the boy's mouth, just inches away from having it pressed against his lips. "You spilled wine on me. Should you not be cleaning it up?"

The boy looked about as nervous as one could be in his position. Sweat starting to roll down the side of his face and hesitating to really do anything. Heather wondered just how soon it would be before the boy finally broke. After what seemed like a long while, the boy once again tried to turn away. His face bare moved an inch before the foot that had been in front of him swiftly went up and then slammed down hard on the crown of his head in a stomping motion. The momentum of the motion caused the boy to smash his face against the marble floor before he rolled and moaned in pain. Dionysus merely chuckled, or rather giggled, before pushing himself up to his feet and towered over the poor boy.

"Dionysus, not another one," Peggy Sue muttered as she placed a hand over her face in frustration.

"This little piggy needs to learn his place, Demeter," Dionysus reasoned with a grin. With the front of his foot, he tapped against the face of the downed boy. When his head was in the right position, Hulk lifted his foot up and swiftly brought it down for an ax kick upon the poor boy.

"Allow me, handsome," Aphrodite said suddenly, strolling up past Dionysus with a sadistic look on her face. He reared back and pulled out a kendo stick fashioned into a fairly long samurai sword. "Look at me, peasant. Do you like what you see?" With the tip of the sword, she tapped at the cheek of the now blood soaked face of the boy and forced him to look up. "Do you find me beautiful? Sexy even?" After a brief moment of hesitation, the boy nervously nodded. "How about my brother? Is he not sexy?" The boy froze, desperate not to give any sort of reaction. "Answer me!" Using the sword, she smacked him hard against the face, a clear mark now present on his cheek. The boy started shaking his head. "No? No what?" The boy merely shook his head more frantically. "No, you won't answer me? Or no, you don't find my brother sexy?" When the boy continued to do nothing more than shake his head, she smacked him harder on the other cheek, drawing blood with the mark that was left. "Well?"

The boy still continued to shake his head, now with tears coming out of his eyes. With a psychotic laugh, Aphrodite proceeded to whip the boy into further submission with the sword. Mark after mark, scar after scar was cut into the boy's back. Then she swung it back against his face and it connected over his eyes, causing him to scream in pain and horror at receiving a new bloody scar.

"Akira, Hulk, enough!" Peggy Sue declared, getting up to her feet. Aphrodite, or Akira, and Dionysus, or Hulk, turned to face her, neither one shedding their sadistic smiles. "You know, it's getting harder and harder to clean up these messes you two make every time you beat a peasant half to death just for fun."

"Sorry, Demeter," Akira responded with a mock pout. "Guess we got a little carried away." She wrapped herself around her brother from behind, her head cradled up against his neck and shoulder, a free hand running slowly over his chest, and rubbing a leg against the front of his. They looked to be enjoying themselves completely.

"Yeah, sure," Peggy Sue scoffed. "If you two psychos weren't so good at what you do, I'd have Ares chuck you out by now." With a sigh, she whipped out her cell phone and proceeded to make a call. No doubt to indeed clean up the mess that was made.

Akira and Hulk meanwhile managed to glance over at Heather. Their smiles only getting wider as they continued to display the kind of affection that was making Heather extremely uncomfortable. She finally had to look away, certain that they would only keep it up if she had not done so.

* * *

**(Confession Cam)**

Heather - /_Shudders._/ "Just being around those two gives me the creeps. You should have seen the first time they both tried to hit on me. At the same time. Together. I imagine they are what Izzy might be like if she ever finally snaps."

Chris - "You're probably wondering why we're not doing anything about what our cameras pick up. Well, for one, we're legally obligated not to interfere with the happenings that go on in the school unless it is of a life-threatening nature. We're guests and besides, we're supposed to concentrate on our kiddies. Furthermore, when we voiced our concerns regarding the twins in particular, we got brushed off like it was nothing to worry about. Even I'm disturbed by all this, folks."

* * *

**Confession Cam Decorations to date:**

Dolphin Sticker on the Camera Lens, Heart-Shaped D+C Graffiti, Car Air Freshener hanging from Z Necklace hanging from Gum on the Ceiling, Kitten Inside a Mug with Face of a Kitten Picture covering Wing Commander Poster covering Justin Headshot covering Horse Poster, 9 Movie Poster, Picture of Janet covering "Courtney vs. Harold" Flyer covering Denzel Washington Poster covering Corey Clark Poster, Portraits of Captains James T. Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard, Booby Trapped Papier-mâché Bust of Izzy with a Frito's Necklace, "Warning: Do not enter under any circumstances when the red light above the door is activated unless you accept responsibility for whatever consequences you may suffer from within" Sign covering Angelina Jolie Poster covering Toronto Maple Leafs Banner and Toronto Blue Jays Banner, Cushioned Chair replacement, Japanese Peace Lily, Cover-Less Book on top of Sally Johnson Professional Make-Up Cabinet, Noah Voodoo Doll on top of Water Cooler, Numerous Pink Plushies with Two Destroyed

**Removed:**

Electric Fish

* * *

So sorry for the long wait. Ran into a lot of things that required my attention more than writing, I'm afraid. But what matters is that I updated an new chapter and that should be seen as a good thing. Though I must admit that the next chapter will not be up for a while until **Return to Total Drama Island** gets all caught up. In the meantime, you folks can help out with the **Richmore Academy Wiki**.

The big thing about this chapter was the introduction of more members to the Dodekatheon. Demeter I actually introduced way back when, but I never really had the chance to identify her until now. Dionysus and Aphrodite, though, those were the two I've been wanting to introduce in this chapter as soon as I started writing it. I will say right here and now that the psycho twins will indeed be major players in the story. It just won't be immediate. See if you can't figure out the many inspirations that went into their development.

**Keep sending in reviews, people! Reviews!** And don't forget suggestions to decorate the Confession Cam with.

**Next Up:** The Out-of-Towners


End file.
